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[0:00] I'm going to talk to you today about combating the constant friction of evil suspicions.! Combating the constant friction of evil suspicions.

[0:10] This phrase, constant friction of evil suspicions, this is from 1 Timothy 6, verses 4-5.

[0:21] In 1 Timothy 6, 4-5, Paul warns Timothy about those who have an unhealthy craving for controversy and for quarrels about words, which produce envy, dissension, slander, evil suspicions, and constant friction.

[0:38] I've been doing a lot of thinking and praying about Christchurch this last week, and I've overall been encouraged by the last 14 months in how far we've come, what God has established for us as a church.

[0:53] But as I look back on the last 14 months, I think there's been one nagging sin that has been kind of tripping us up since day one.

[1:05] And I've been praying into that, thinking into that, and especially in seeing this verse, I think God is shedding light on it. I think it's evil suspicions. Evil suspicions.

[1:17] What I mean by that is being suspicious of people. What I'm not talking about is just actually seeing something outright and blatant. I'm talking about when you don't see, but you're not giving people the benefit of the doubt.

[1:31] You're suspicious of them. You're not trusting that motives or actions are right. Here's some examples of what I mean that people have been suspicious of.

[1:42] So, first one would be just general motives. Okay? Just assuming that, oh, their motives are bad. What they're doing is motivated out of things that aren't good, that aren't godly.

[1:55] Okay? Another thing that people might be suspicious of is whether or not people are sincere or genuine. Okay? Like, you know, I'm not really convinced that that's sincere.

[2:07] I think they're being fake. I think they don't really mean that. They don't really mean what they said. They don't really mean what they're doing. So, doubting, being suspicious of whether people are sincere or genuine.

[2:22] Another one is being suspicious of whether people are loving. Okay? Like, I don't really know if they're doing this because they love me, or I don't really know if these people do love me.

[2:33] I'm really doubting that this person loves me. I kind of feel like I'm a project. I kind of feel like they're just kind of doing what they're doing. But I don't really know. I'm pretty suspicious that what they're doing is loving towards me, that they really love me.

[2:47] Okay? Some people have maybe been suspicious about how we do partnership or membership at our church. Some people have been suspicious about how we bring in new people into our church.

[2:59] Some have been suspicious of who's leading now, myself or current lead partners or people who have been lead partners. Some are suspicious of possible future leaders and how they will lead.

[3:16] Okay? And there's been comments made and things said about maybe suspicion about who could potentially be leading in the future and how they're going to lead. There's been suspicion about church planting methods or apostolicity.

[3:31] So how apostles are supposed to function and how that even works. Suspicion about ministry ambition. That, oh, really, this is just all about, it's just this kind of ministry ambitious machine.

[3:44] Some people have been ambitious, or I mean, sorry, have been suspicious of whether you belong and suspicious of others' attempts to include you.

[3:57] Maybe you're thinking, you know, I don't even know if I really belong here. And I'm suspicious of whether people really want me here. I'm suspicious of whether people even are really trying to include me.

[4:07] Okay? Maybe you've been suspicious of that. Maybe you've been suspicious of your husband or your wife. Maybe you've been suspicious of... Okay, that word is hard to say.

[4:18] I'm going to keep screwing it up. Maybe you've been suspicious of preaching motives or topics that have been covered. Maybe you're suspicious about this preaching topic.

[4:34] Maybe you've been suspicious about men being misogynistic or domineering towards women. Or maybe you've been suspicious of women being feministic or usurpatious towards men.

[4:46] Okay? So there's all kinds of ways that we can be suspicious of one another. Not giving each other the benefit of the doubt, but, hmm, I don't know about this person.

[4:57] I don't know about their motives or what they're thinking. Okay? But I think this is really important. And I think it's really important for the life of Christchurch.

[5:08] I will go as far as to say this could be the most important sermon I've given at Christchurch so far. Because evil suspicions and the frictions that result from them could have the power to destroy us from the inside out.

[5:23] Okay? So let me give you a couple disclaimers. Number one, I am not speaking to one person or two people or any specific people. I'm speaking to everyone, including myself.

[5:38] Okay? Including myself and my family. Okay? In fact, I've been convicted lately. Just, you know, we just, Gene and I just had our 26-year wedding anniversary.

[5:49] And, you know, whenever you do that, you kind of take inventory of your own marriage and your own relationship, as one does on those days. And one of the things that I was thinking of and convicted of, and we were both convicted of, is over time how even you can become suspicious of each other in your marriage.

[6:09] Mistrusting. Not giving the other person the benefit of the doubt. Thinking that the reason, you know, your spouse is bringing something up is for some nefarious reason or purpose or selfish reason.

[6:20] And I think Gene and I really realized that that's crept in too much in our marriage. Where there's this unhealthy suspicion of each other. This mistrust. And we were really convicted of that.

[6:32] And that needs to stop in our marriage. And I know that, I guarantee that affects our kids as well in how they see things. And we don't want to have a family that is defaulting to suspicion.

[6:45] Okay? We don't want to have a family that's defaulting to suspicion. So that's the first thing. Disclaimer. Talking to everybody. Okay? Including myself. Okay, number two. What I am not saying.

[6:57] I am not saying that we should, I am not saying that we should be undiscerning. Okay? To be undiscerning is to make the opposite error of evil suspicions.

[7:10] Okay? How we discern and what we do with it is very important. Okay? How we discern and what we do with it is very important. So please hear me on that. Discernment is a big deal.

[7:21] Very important. Okay? So I want to get a few people I want to read from that I think are helpful on this. But Greg Morse, who's one of the writers on Desiring God, says this.

[7:34] Cynicism and suspicion, I know firsthand, crawl into our minds and make us traitors to ourselves. Dangers to our families and toxins to our church.

[7:46] Our suspicions can make us strike at those dearest to us. This is why this sometimes happens in a marriage, right? Of all people, you wouldn't want to be antagonistic towards a spouse.

[7:59] But these suspicions can make us strike at those dearest to us. They contain a self-fulfilling prophecy. The more we suspect, the more reasons we find to suspect.

[8:10] The more we distrust, the more reasons we find to distrust. Every creak of the floor becomes a burglar. Does that make sense?

[8:20] So you start hearing those things and watching those things. All of a sudden, everything becomes a, oh, yep, see, that's a confirmation of that. That's, you know, becomes almost confirmation bias. Every creak of the floor becomes a burglar.

[8:33] He goes on, he says, Thinking the worst of our loved ones or our neighbors is unjust and often unreliable. And it passes too easily unnoticed. Yet if our sins have been unimaginably forgiven by God, and in Christ they have been, then we have been set free to lay down our subtle suspicions, our default distrust, and to assume the best of others.

[9:00] That phrase, default distrust, that's a convicting one. Do you have any, is your default distrust or is your default love?

[9:11] We'll look at that in a second. Now, where sin is apparent, things may change, but suspicion would have us confront possible sins with the same conviction and severity as obvious ones.

[9:25] Okay? Suspicion would have us confront possible sins with the same conviction and severity as obvious ones. And this shouldn't be. Okay? Obvious ones should definitely be confronted.

[9:35] But possible ones should be treated differently. Okay? We really have been freed by Christ to hope the best, to assume the best of others' intentions, and to leave the secret sins of others to their creator.

[9:49] This is the love that covers a multitude of sins, actual or imagined. This is that glory of a godly person who passes over affronts. As Proverbs 19.11 says, Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.

[10:07] Okay? I also was reading, Charles Spurgeon has a chapter on this in his book, Letters to My Students. And the chapter is called The Blind Eye and the Deaf Ear.

[10:18] I want to read a couple quotes from that that I thought were really good and helpful on this topic. He says, Many a friend has been transformed into an enemy by being suspected.

[10:28] And he says, It would be better to be deceived a hundred times than to live a life of suspicion. Think about that one for a second. Maybe you're thinking, No, I don't know about that.

[10:42] But think about that. It would be better to be deceived a hundred times than to live a life of suspicion. I agree with that phrase, and I think the reason he's saying that is because living a life of suspicion is no way to live.

[10:55] Plus, it's also devoid of God. It makes us think that we're the ones who have to control everything and make sure of everything, rather than trusting God, and that we do our part, he does his part.

[11:07] But, you know, I would rather be deceived a hundred times than to live a life of suspicion, because to live a life of suspicion is no real life at all. He says, Suspicion is a moral evil, and it injures the character of the man who harbors it.

[11:22] He says, Learn to disbelieve those who have no faith in their brethren. Suspect those who would lead you to suspect others. Okay? I've been thinking long and hard about what it is that makes some relationships feel real close, and then other relationships, real close, not just close, but like comfortable, safe, and why others feel distant, uncomfortable, and unsettling.

[11:52] And I believe it's the difference between suspicion and giving people the benefit of the doubt. Like, if I think of all the people who feel most closest to me, those are people who give me the benefit of the doubt.

[12:04] Like, they're not, their default isn't distrust. Their default is, hey, I'm going to give this person the benefit of the doubt. And I feel more free to be open with those people. I feel more myself around those people.

[12:15] I feel more relaxed around those people. The people that are, you know, harder to be close to, that feel more distant, are people who I feel are always kind of checking me out.

[12:28] Like, what about this guy? You know, kind of the default distrust. Like, I don't know if I can be myself. That's not what you want, and that is not what we would ever want in a church culture.

[12:41] Okay? We want people who do 1 Corinthians chapter 13, verse 7. This is that love chapter that describes what love is like. And at the end of the list of all the things, in verse 7, he says, love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things.

[13:00] Okay? Bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. That's the opposite of suspicion. That's the opposite. Okay? Four different things.

[13:12] Love bears all things. Okay? Love doesn't say, oh, because this is hard, that absolutely means that there's definitely something wrong here with the other person.

[13:22] It could be us. It could be nothing. It could just be two personalities that are hard to get, you know, to get along with. Right? But love bears all things.

[13:35] It bears all things. Love believes all things. Essentially saying like, I'm going to believe the, love believes the best of the other person. It doesn't assume the worst. It doesn't assume bad motives.

[13:45] It doesn't assume, oh, that must be because of this. Now, if, you know, if, it's like with your, if a kid, if your kid hauls up and hits your, the other, your other kid.

[13:57] It's like, it's okay to say, hey, don't hit your brother or sister. It's like, well, you're being awfully suspicious of me. It's like, no, listen, I don't know your motives, but I know your behavior.

[14:08] And that was wrong. Like, you can't hit somebody. Right? So, I'm not, again, hear what I'm saying, not what I'm not saying. I'm talking about when you're, there are certain things that are super obvious.

[14:19] You haul off and just hit someone and hurt someone. It's like, that's wrong. Don't do that. You say something really mean to someone. That's wrong. Right? You, you, you curse someone or slander someone.

[14:31] That's wrong. You know, there's certain things that are very obviously wrong. All right? But then there's things where you're not necessarily sure. Or maybe you have an inclination or an impression or a thought about them.

[14:42] Love believes all things. It says, you know what? I'm going to hope the best for them. I'm going to hope the best for them. Love hopes all things. Okay? Hopes what?

[14:53] Hopes the best. And love endures all things. We might say, well, man, I don't know. This is probably, this is probably something bad.

[15:06] You know? It's got to be something bad. It's like, but I don't know for sure because it hasn't manifested in some specific fruit I confront. But I got a really good hankering that it is. Well, in that instance, you got to endure.

[15:20] You got to keep praying and asking the Lord that if there's sin there, that it will be exposed. That it will be brought to the surface. And 1 Timothy 5.24 says, some sins go before us and some sins trail behind.

[15:32] But at the end of the day, what that verse is saying is, they're always going to show up. But they don't always show up when we want them to. We can inspect and be the detective and think we got it all figured out.

[15:48] Yep, it's definitely there. But I don't really have any hard evidence. But I know it's there. You got to endure and trust. And during that time, you're enduring. Is it enduring with the default mistrust?

[15:59] It's enduring with the other things. Bearing things, believing all things, and hoping all things. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Let me ask you the question in light of that verse.

[16:10] Are you loving? Are you loving people in this church? Are you loving people in your family? Are you loving everyone in this church? Not just most of them. What about that person that's hard to love?

[16:22] Are you loving them in the sense that you are bearing all things, believing all things, hoping all things, and enduring all things? You're hoping the best. You're giving them the benefit of the doubt. You're believing the best.

[16:32] You're praying for them if you are concerned for them. Are you doing that? And again, don't think you're so great. If you're able to do that with most everybody, except for one or two or whatever, maybe.

[16:51] Because that's the one where it really counts. That's the one that's really telling, hey, are you loving? Are you able to love that person and hope the best for them?

[17:04] I'm telling you, when we create an atmosphere of love, Bible-defined love, not some weird worldly love, but Bible-defined love, where we bear all things, believe all things, hope all things, and endure all things, that's the kind of love that is conducive for real-life open-heartedness, where people can be themselves, not worrying about people judging them or trying to fix them in an unhealthy way, but where people can be family with one another.

[17:37] And that's what we want. That's what we need. That's important. So I want us to think about that. I want us to think about that verse and ask that question. That's a convicting verse. It's so easy to have our default be to mistrust.

[17:50] Okay? So let's look at how we judge. Tom Schmidt, pastor, writes, Many of us have chosen the pleasure of evil suspicions above the pleasure of knowing Christ.

[18:05] An evil suspicion is when we believe something wicked about someone, someone else, based on speculation rather than evidence. Okay? Let me read that again. An evil suspicion is when we believe something wicked about someone based on speculation rather than evidence.

[18:23] Okay? To believe the worst in someone, to assume they are against you, to assume they have committed some perverse act, to assume they are acting out of evil motives, etc., without evidence produces a prideful pleasure and an idolatrous security in our hearts.

[18:42] The pleasure we experience in this sin comes from believing that we have a superior knowledge or awareness of a situation. Okay? That's really important. Let me read that again.

[18:53] The pleasure we experience in this sin comes from believing that we have a superior knowledge or awareness of a situation which others are blind to.

[19:04] Kind of like this exclusive insight or information. And our assessment of what is happening is more righteous than the person engaging in the act. The pleasure is in the pride.

[19:14] The pleasure is in the pride. The security we receive comes from trusting in our assessment of the situation above resting in and submitting to God.

[19:26] This is idolatry. That is a super important point. Okay? The security we receive comes from trusting in our assessment of the situation above resting in and submitting to God.

[19:39] And this is idolatry. What he's saying there is that we oftentimes, there's this insidious, subtle pleasure with just assessing people.

[19:51] With having accurate knowledge of where people are at or what we think is accurate knowledge. And then our, like, almost feeling the need to control or be God in that situation to make sure that people see things, understand things, or experience our revelation of what we're seeing.

[20:11] And the pleasure is in the pride because what we're not doing is resting in and submitting to God. And that's idolatry. Can we trust God in our spouses, in our children, in the people in our church?

[20:27] Can we trust God to do the work that he does so good, to convict people of sin, to bring sin to the surface? Can we trust God, who only knows their hearts, not us, to do heart surgery?

[20:43] Can we trust the word of God to do what only the word of God can do? Hebrews 4, 12, it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Will we trust God's word, God's authority, God's intervention, God's heart towards people to do the work and to have the right view of things?

[21:02] Or do we take pleasure over and above God himself and resting in him, the pleasure that comes from resting in him, do we find pleasure in our having everything figured out?

[21:13] That's a dangerous thing. Our pursuit of evil suspicions is folly and rebellion against our creator, who calls us to take our neighbor's words at face value, love believes all things, and commands us to reject hypocritical, self-righteous judgments, like in Matthew 7.

[21:30] In other words, you can't judge people's hearts. Okay? You can't judge people's hearts. Why? Because you don't know people's hearts. Only God knows people's hearts.

[21:42] You can judge their fruit, and I would say you should. I would say you have a responsibility to, and we'll look at that in a second. But you can't judge people's hearts because you can never know someone's heart.

[21:54] Now, you can ask people about their hearts based on fruit, maybe do a little digging. Proverbs says that the heart is a deep well, and a man of understanding is able to draw things out of it.

[22:11] Okay? And so that's a good thing to do, but you have to be very careful in that. It takes a man of understanding. It's not saying, well, I know what's in your heart. It's saying, I know what fruit is in your life, and because of this fruit, maybe I'll ask some probing questions.

[22:27] But I'm not going to ask them in a way that I am assuming the worst of you. I'm going to ask them in a way that I'm loving you, and I'm assuming the best. But I'm considering that some of these things could possibly be there.

[22:39] Okay? Okay? So, Luke 6 talks about this. Luke 6, 37 to 45. It says, Judge not, and you will not be judged. So again, some of you might say, yeah, I thought we're not supposed to judge.

[22:52] The Bible says it right there. Right? Judge not, and you will not be judged. You know, don't judge me, bro. Condemn not, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.

[23:03] Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you. He also told them a parable.

[23:14] Can a blind man lead a blind man? Will they not both fall into a pit? A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone when he is fully trained will be like his teacher. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?

[23:29] How can you say to your brother, Brother, let me take out the speck that is in your eye, when you yourself do not see the log that is in your own eye? You hypocrite.

[23:40] First, take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take out the speck that is in your brother's eye. So he's clearly not, if you just take the first verse and say judge not, you'd say, yeah man, are you talking about you're not supposed to judge?

[23:57] You're not supposed to judge, but that's just taking that verse out of context. When he reads the rest of it, he's saying, no, you're to judge, but you should be careful how you judge. You should judge a certain way.

[24:07] First of all, knowing that whatever way you judge, whatever measure you use is going to be measured back to you. You know, in other words, I think a singer once said, the mercy you don't give is the mercy you don't get.

[24:22] He said the same measure, press down, and you know, prosperity preachers love to take this verse out of context and say, yeah man, it's about giving. You just give, and then it just pours back on you. And it's like, no, that's not about giving.

[24:33] It's about judgment and mercy, which is what they need. Ironically. It's like, actually, we should be judging your false teaching.

[24:46] Okay, this is a verse that Jesus is saying. He's saying, don't judge in an unrighteous way. Don't judge in an unhealthy way. When you judge, first of all, realize, whatever way you use, hey, that's how it's going to be used on you, so be careful.

[24:59] Okay? The mercy you don't give is the most mercy you don't get. And then he tells us how to actually judge the right way. He's saying, how can you say to your brother, brother, let me take out the speck that is in your eye when you yourself do not see the log that is in your own eye?

[25:18] You hypocrite. First take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take out the speck that is in your brother's eye. So he's saying, this is how you judge. In order to judge, you have to be able to see.

[25:31] Like, judgment is a certain level of seeing. So to judge well, to judge rightly, you have to see. You can't see when a log is sticking out of your eye. Right? So he's saying, take that out first, examine yourself first, make sure you're not in pride, arrogance, exulting in your revelation or your insight into someone and your, you know, evaluation of them.

[25:53] Okay? Take your, and then take a good look at yourself, say, hey, how are you doing here, bro? Remove that log, and then now, you can see clearly to see the speck and to take it out.

[26:06] And he's saying you should, and that's judgment. Judgment is saying, hey, you got a speck in your eye. But that's not loving. Like, if you saw that I had a speck in my eye, and you saw that my eye was watering, and it was all red, but you could see the speck, you'd say, hold on, let me just, I'm not going to be like, bro, don't judge me.

[26:24] Like, how do you know I have a speck in my eye? It's like, I'm trying to help you. Like, your eye is clearly, like, infected. Can I just, yeah, and then take the speck out, and you'd say, oh, maybe you do love me.

[26:35] Yes, that is love. Real righteous judgment is actually love. Taking speck out of people's eyes is loving, because those specks are causing discomfort and harm.

[26:48] Now, again, read this whole thing in context. So we know, the context of judge not is in the context of take the log out of your eye, but there's still more context here. After he says, you will see clearly to take out the speck that is in your brother eye, your brother's eye, the very next verse says, for no good, and it says for, so it's connecting these two together.

[27:09] So don't separate this judgment from this next verse, because it says for. So put them together. Verse 43, this is Luke 6, 43. For no good tree bears bad fruit, nor again does a bad tree bear good fruit, for each tree is known by its own fruit.

[27:29] Okay? For figs are not gathered from thorn bushes, nor are grapes picked from a bramble bush. The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of the evil treasure produces evil.

[27:41] For out of the abundance of the heart, his mouth speaks. So you can't judge the heart, but you can judge what comes out of the mouth. You can judge the fruit, and you should, and you should.

[27:52] Okay? So, not only is he telling us how to judge, he's telling us what to judge. You're not judging a person's heart, you're judging the fruit in their life.

[28:04] If you can't see fruit, but you have an inclination that something's there, you need to, you need to wait. You need to pray. You need to trust God, and ask God and just say, God, is there something here?

[28:17] If there is, bring it to the surface and you trust. And in the meantime, you give them the benefit of the doubt. It's like, how can I give them the benefit of the doubt if I have this, I feel like I see this, I discern this. It's like, you can't judge your heart.

[28:30] You may be right. You may be right, but you have to be patient. You have to be loving. You have to hope the best. And you have to let God do his job and you do yours.

[28:42] And God's job is to bring that stuff to light. Your job is to pray. And I think sometimes we so underestimate the power of prayer, we so minimize the power of prayer that we think that that's like a lesser work.

[28:57] Like, no, actually the real work is that I tell them what I think is there, even if I haven't seen any fruit of it yet. No, the real work is to pray that God would bring that to them and that they would be convicted of it and they would see it.

[29:12] Will you do that? Everybody wants to discern things. Everybody wants to see things. Everybody wants to get things right on things. But where are the people who will pray into things?

[29:25] A lot smaller crowd when it comes to that. And I'm telling you, the real discerners, the real people who are in it not for their own glory and their own satisfaction, but are in it for the glory of God are the ones who are willing to pray into things for days, months, maybe years, that they think they see and they're willing to pray and pray and pray until God brings it forth and causes them to be convicted themselves and new fruit is born.

[29:59] Who's willing to do that? Who's willing to do that work? Who's willing to do that work in a new church plant to do the work of building a good foundation in this church? Not of evil suspicion, skepticism, and cynicism, but of love that hopes the best for people and is praying through all those impressions, discernments, and things that we think are there.

[30:24] Again, I'm not telling anybody that they're seeing things right or wrong. That's not my place right now in this sermon. The whole point is what do you do with it? What do you do with it? And how do you view things?

[30:36] How do you view things? If our default is mistrust, we're not building a good culture. And I'm afraid that we have had little pockets of distrust ever since day one that have been hindering our church.

[30:51] And we've overcome some, and so please hear me. I'm not saying, man, we're just a really mistrusty church. This church is messed up and bad. You guys suck. I'm not saying that. I'm saying, this is here.

[31:04] It's been here. It was literally there from day one. I was surprised how it came up in the beginning. And we've been dealing with it and there's been good repentance. But I'm saying there's still, it's still there.

[31:17] And it needs to be repented of. Because it's not loving. It's not loving. Okay? 1 Corinthians 4 verse 5 says, do not pronounce judgment before the time before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart.

[31:38] Then each one will receive his commendation from God. That's God's work. He will for sure do it at the end, but sometimes he brings those things up earlier through our prayers. 1 Corinthians 5 9-13 says, I wrote you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people, not at all meaning the sexually immoral of this world, or the greedy and swindlers or idolaters.

[32:00] Since then, you would need to go out of the world. But now I'm writing you not to associate with anyone who bears the name of brother if he's guilty of sexual immorality or greed or is an idolater, reviler, drunkard, or swindler.

[32:16] Not even to eat with such a one. For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Is it not those inside the church whom you are to judge? God judges those outside, purge the evil person from among you.

[32:29] So here he's saying, if you're wondering, are we supposed to judge? Yes, yes, yes. He goes on to say, we're actually going to judge angels. So we should be able to be able to judge matters within the church.

[32:40] We just need to be doing it the way that Jesus taught to do it. Okay? We need to render true judgments. Zechariah 8-16 says, These are the things that you shall do.

[32:51] Speak the truth to one another. Render in your gates judgments that are true and make for peace. Not judgment that you think are true. Judgments that are true.

[33:02] Not judgments that you assume are true. Not judgments that might be true. Render judgments that are true. This is what we need to do. Same thing is kind of said in Ephesians 4-25.

[33:15] It says, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members of one another. The start of that is to put off falsehood. It's to say, I don't know for sure if this is true, so I'm going to put it off either altogether or I'm going to put it off by giving it to the Lord in prayer.

[33:34] And I'm going to speak what I know to be true to my neighbor. If I don't know, then I shouldn't be speaking it. If I don't know, then I shouldn't be speaking it to someone else. Shouldn't be speaking it to someone else.

[33:46] In fact, Ecclesiastes 7-21-22 says, do not take to heart all the things that people say lest you hear your servant cursing you. Your heart knows that many times you yourself have cursed others.

[34:01] Spurgeon was saying in that chapter I was reading that you should basically give people a pass when they say things out of passion because how many things have you said out of passion that you wish you could take back?

[34:14] I was like, yeah, that's probably true. I hope people will give me a pass for some of the things I've said in passion over the years because I know I have. And it's easy to latch onto those things.

[34:30] That's why he's saying have blind eyes and deaf ears to those things. Basically, David says the same thing. Psalm 38, 13-14. He said, I'm like a deaf man. I do not hear like a mute man who does not open his mouth.

[34:43] I have become like a man who does not hear and in whose mouth are no rebukes. Sometimes you hear things and you just got to be like, you know what? Or you think things and you want to know a format.

[34:56] Here, I'm going to tell you a little secret of how to get really stressed out. In case you're wondering, you probably didn't know how to get really stressed out but a really good way. He's like, no, don't.

[35:09] If you want to get really stressed out, try to do God's job for him. Try to put on those God-sized shoes, right? It'll crush you.

[35:20] It'll weigh on you. And I think even from good motives, listen to me on this, I think even from good motives where you're literally wanting to bless other people, to bless our church, to do good to the people in our church, we can inadvertently take on God's job and do a bad job at it, number one.

[35:43] But then two, just like be really weighed down and screw things up. Even though we're, our motive is, I just want to love them. If this is in them, I don't want it to be there.

[35:53] That's not good. That's not going to benefit them. It's not going to benefit the kingdom. So even sometimes you can have these suspicions with the, and have the right motives. It's just, you end up veering into God's job description instead of our own, which is to trust God, pray into these things, submit them to him.

[36:17] Sometimes just have blind eyes and deaf ears to certain things we see or think we see or hear from other people. Just like, you know what? I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt. I'm going to bear all things.

[36:30] I'm going to believe all things. I'm going to hope all things. I'm going to, I'm going to do that. But man, this is probably, it's probably there. No, but I'm going to believe all things, hope all things. And I'm going to, I'm going to do it.

[36:43] You know, I'm going to do that. And then when I do see things that I know that fruit has come forth, I'm still not going to speak it right away. I'm going to pray for God to give me the right timing, the right way.

[36:56] Pray to be a father, a mother, to be a good brother, a good sister. I'm going to pray that I would do it in the spirit of the Lord. Right? I'm going to pray for the right timing. Timing helps.

[37:06] Okay? If you're married, you know that, right? Sometimes you bring things up at the worst possible time. I feel, I'm not going to go there.

[37:20] I'm sure Gene would say the same thing. Like, why would you bring this up now? It's a great point. Great point. Ephesians 4, 1 to 3 says, I, therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you've been called with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the spirit and the bond of peace.

[37:46] Are you eager to maintain the unity of the spirit and the bond of peace? If you are, don't default to mistrust. Don't default to suspicion. Because that's not going to maintain the unity of the spirit and the bond of peace.

[37:58] Romans 12, 10 says, outdo one another in showing honor. I think hoping the best for someone, believing the best for someone is a great way to outdo one another in showing honor.

[38:11] It's saying, you know what? I honor you as a child of God and I'm going to give you, I'm going to honor you by giving you the benefit of the doubt.

[38:22] I'm going to love you by giving you the benefit of the doubt. I'm going to outdo you in showing honor by giving you the benefit of the doubt. Imagine if that was our default, what that would do in our marriages, what that would do in our church, what that would do in our, even maybe work relationships sometimes.

[38:39] I mean, think of some of your work relationships where you're just like, oh my gosh. It's like default mistrust, right? Now, I'm not telling you to be, you know, just, okay, fine, just let in all this bad stuff and just like, I'm going to give everybody the benefit of the doubt.

[38:52] No. But, you know what I'm saying? Like, there's a way to think. Romans 12, 17 says, repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all.

[39:05] Give thought. So I'm asking you to take heed to what the scripture says here and to give thought to this, to give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all.

[39:16] I want you to think about this. I want you to think about how you're, what is your default, how your mind works, how you're thinking about the different people in this church. Maybe even go through the list and think, am I loving all of these people?

[39:30] Am I defaulting to love or defaulting to suspicion? And then I'm saying, let's remove all the obstacles of evil suspicions. Let's, let's get them out of the way.

[39:40] All right? I believe that all my heart God wants to establish this church. I believe he's going to. I believe he has been. And I believe this is an obstacle that's standing in the way. 2 Corinthians 6, 3 says, we put no obstacle in anyone's way so that no fault may be found with our ministry.

[39:55] We need to say the same thing. We need to say, if I have put an obstacle in the way of this ministry of this church by being, have this unhealthy skepticism, cynicism, or suspicion, I need to repent from it and turn to God and love the way 1 Corinthians 13, 7 says.

[40:13] Romans 12, 18 says, if possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Okay, one caveat with this. If you believe that you've been suspicious of some people in a way that you should not, don't go to people and say, I've been suspicious of you.

[40:31] Okay? That's not going to help. That will probably just bring up more suspicion. Okay? Take care of that between you and the Lord.

[40:43] Now, if you like were a jerk to somebody, say, I'm sorry for being a jerk. If you were mean to someone, say, I'm sorry for being unloving to you. But, as far as being, you know, suspicious and skeptical and cynical with someone, take care of that with you and the Lord because if you just go to them with that, it's going to cause more problems and you can have this subtle kind of, this is my way to kind of, you know, tell them that they have something wrong but by not telling them and like me looking like I'm humble at the same time, you know, this kind of sophisticated thing.

[41:15] So, it's best just to take care of that with you and the Lord. Alright? Repent and go to God and then start loving that person by hoping the best for them. Okay? This is a healthy, loving church when we bear all things, believe all things, hope all things, and endure all things.

[41:33] That's why Psalm 133 verse 1 says, Behold, how good and pleasant it is when brothers dwell together in unity. Behold, it's good when we dwell together in unity and we're not defaulting to mistrust, it's a good thing.

[41:50] It's a good church. It's a good experience. Alright? Close with Romans 15, 5 through 6. May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another in accord with Christ Jesus that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.

[42:11]  Amen? Amen? Amen.