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[0:00] Ephesians 5.21 The context there is of speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing!

[0:30] Verse 21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands as unto the Lord.

[0:40] For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church. And he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.

[0:56] Husbands, love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it, that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, that he might present it to himself, a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that it should be holy and without blemish.

[1:21] So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies, he that loveth his wife loveth himself. Talking about the family, the family, the Christian family, and it's really the most important task is the building of a godly home.

[1:43] Building a godly home. There was a little boy named Danny. He lived in a caravan park, in just some caravan with his family.

[1:55] And one day someone asked him, don't you wish you had a real home? And Danny's reply was wise beyond his years. He said, we have a real home.

[2:07] We just don't have a house to put it in. You know, he had a home. It was the family. It's not so much the house, it's the home. It's the home life.

[2:18] It's the family unit. And thank God, God is in the home building business. He's building homes. He's building families. In Psalm 127, verse 1, it says, Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it.

[2:39] Except the Lord keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain. Now we know families go through all kinds of stresses and troubles and not always how we'd ideally like them to see.

[2:54] We know sadly families can break up and sometimes through no fault of one of the parties. Yet we know that God's ideal is for a family to be strong and godly.

[3:07] And that's what I want to exhort to tonight. God wants families to live together in a healthy relationship, in that harmony that comes from him.

[3:18] We know the world we're living in is a world where marriage is under attack. It's being assaulted, as it were, by the powers of darkness. It's being threatened, the sacredness of marriage, of godly marriage, of godly family.

[3:33] As we see, it's broken frequently through divorce, where the marriage ceremony and what it stands for is lost. It's shredded and in tatters and trampled upon.

[3:45] We see feminism abounding. We're seeing a public disrespect for parents, for authority in general. An escalating of juvenile delinquency, of promiscuity and of rebellion.

[3:59] It's the stand that our world is taking on such things. And it's as a result of the crumbling of the family unit. As people are refusing the traditional marriage and our family responsibilities.

[4:15] As there's an undermining of the headship of the home, of God's ideal order. As there's an increasing adultery and immorality and such things.

[4:27] We see that the family is very much in the enemy's target sides. He's got the crosshairs, as it were, on the families, on godly families.

[4:40] And God wants us to see families that are strong and godly. It's about priorities. It's about priorities. We all need to make priorities for our lives, for our homes.

[4:51] And really, the essential is, seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness. In Matthew 6, verse 33. That's the starting point.

[5:03] That's the first essential. And we must place that responsibility on our relationship with God. On that reverence for Him.

[5:13] On that devotion towards Him. Then we see of the relationship, of the children to the parents. of honouring and obeying. And we see the relationship of a husband to his wife, to love and to lead.

[5:31] Of a wife's relationship to her husband, to support as a helpmate and to submit. In a godly framework. And I'd like to put it to you tonight, some of the principles of a godly family.

[5:48] And that which we can aspire to as God's people. And one is godly order. Godly order. As we see in this text that I read.

[5:59] Husbands, love your wives. Wives, submit to your own husbands. There's a godly order. A godly relationship.

[6:11] Not a brow beating. Not an under your thumb. But a godly submission. As you submit yourselves one to another. There is a submitting to one another in the fear of God.

[6:24] There's a godly structure. A godly authority. That God has designed for the home unit. A godly submission.

[6:35] Godly submission. Godly headship. And who is the head? The Lord Jesus. The Lord Jesus Christ must be the head of the home.

[6:48] Colossians 3.16. It says, Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly. In all wisdom. Teaching and admonishing one another.

[6:59] In psalms and hymns and spiritual songs. Singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatsoever you do in word or deed.

[7:10] Do all in the name of the Lord Jesus. Giving thanks to God and the Father by him. Christ must be pre-eminent.

[7:21] Pre-eminent. That he would have the pre-eminence. And that applies to the family unit. To the home. That his word would dwell in us richly.

[7:34] That his praise would sound forth from our lips. In psalms and hymns and spiritual songs. That his name would be honoured in our homes.

[7:45] And in our works. Christ must be pre-eminent. His word. His praise. His name. To be given the greatest honour and respect.

[7:58] Christ is the head of the church. And he ought to be the head. As it were. Of the home. That is under his authority. His word must dwell richly.

[8:09] Within the whole family. And that's something we want to engender. Isn't it? As godly parents. God helping us. To see our children.

[8:20] Trust him. We know it's not always the case. But God helping us. And according to his will. We see many blessings.

[8:32] For the godly parent. As much as we may see tragedy too. But there's a saying that goes like this. Christ is the head of this house.

[8:42] The unseen guest at every meal. And the silent listener to every conversation. That's a good motto isn't it? You see that in some homes today. Where Christ is the head of this house.

[8:55] They make that statement. He's the unseen guest at our table. He's the silent listener to every conversation. Christ having the pre-eminence. It's godly order in the home.

[9:07] There's a story of a company. That was created in California. A lady Karen Donovan created this company. It was called Rent a Wife.

[9:22] Now this company was designed. To help clients decorate their homes. Keep their checkbooks balanced. And run errands. And this lady Donovan.

[9:34] Launched her business through a small ad. In the local newspaper. And it's already thinking big. After four months of operation. This goes on to say.

[9:45] She wants to hire her father. To initiate Rent a Husband. And her two teens. To start Rent a Family. She says this.

[9:57] We can do what any family does. This is the Rent a Family. If you're interested. We'll have to get you the details later. Rent a Family.

[10:08] She says this. We can come over. And eat all the food. Turn on all the lights. Put handprints on the walls. Take showers.

[10:19] And leave the towels on the floor. And when clients are finished. With Rent a Family. They'll have to call Rent a Wife. Rent a Wife. There's a godly order. In the home.

[10:29] Isn't there? I know. I'm blessed with a loving wife. Who always looks after me so good. And I was thinking really. I wanted to really preach a sermon to praise her.

[10:40] But I don't want her to get her too big a hair. Tonight. So that she still can get out the door. After the sermon. But you know. It says that her husband will praise her. And I love to praise my beloved wife.

[10:53] As much as she's got many faults. And she's married to the one as well. But we thank God for the godly order of a home.

[11:05] And where there's a mutual respect. And a loving order. And there's a loving submission of a wife to her husband. And the husband will give a selfless love to the wife.

[11:17] To lead the family in godliness and truth. There's a story about a man. He just went to the hands of the earth for his wife. Here's the story.

[11:29] It says. To prove his love for her. He swam the deepest river. He crossed the widest desert. And climbed the highest mountain. She divorced him.

[11:42] He was never home. So sometimes it's about being home. Fellas. And I know. I'm one guilty of that. And it's one of my greatest faults. That sometimes we can get so busy.

[11:54] That we neglect our wife and family. And I'm certainly one of the biggest. The biggest. What's the word? The biggest culprits.

[12:04] So this is a sermon to Andrew Craig's in mind. And then it goes on in Ephesians 5. 25. Husbands, love your wives. Even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it.

[12:18] That's love. That's love. Isn't it, fellas? Love your wives. Even as Christ also loved the church. His assembly of the saved.

[12:30] Those that he loved so much that he bled and died. To transform us into his children by faith. Love your wives that much.

[12:41] That's a lot, isn't it? A godly order. That's what we need to aspire to. God helping us to. And secondly, godly communication. We need godly communication in the home.

[12:56] I know I overheard my brother over dinner tonight referring to this very verse. In Deuteronomy 6, verses 4 to 7. Deuteronomy 4 to 7 of chapter 6.

[13:09] It says, So in other words, 24 by 7.

[13:50] By 365. That's what it's saying, isn't it? You shall teach them the words of God. The Lord our God is one Lord. Teach them diligently to your children.

[14:03] Day and night. Morning and evening. When you're walking. When you're sitting. When you're lying down. When you're rising up. Teach them to your children. Friends, that's godly conversation.

[14:14] A godly conversation. Talk about the word of God. I know there's some godly families in our church. And I've said it before. They're absolute fanatics. For Christ.

[14:24] Have you heard about graffiti? These people have got Bible verses. These people have got Bible verses plastered over the walls of their house. You know, absolutely radical people.

[14:36] And that's something good. The Bible says to put them on the doorposts of your home, doesn't it? And have them around about. And have them around about. Where you live. The word of God.

[14:47] Talk about it. Apply it. Write it. And read it. Maintaining a godly conversation is a good thing. Because why? In him we live and move and have our being.

[15:01] He has life. To know him. His life. Converse the word of God. Show to your children how the Bible applies to their lives.

[15:12] Their decisions. The everyday. You know, it's a blessing. I was blessed of late. To sit down to a meal with our children and our grandchildren.

[15:24] And the grandchildren were fighting over who was going to say grace. And that's a blessing, isn't it? To think, well, I'm glad they're arguing about such a thing as that. That's a good thing.

[15:35] It's a godly conversation. To want to pray. To want to give thanks for our daily bread. And thank God. Godly communication is happening in that home.

[15:48] And we thank God. As much as we all could do better. That some of our children are showing that godly communication in their homes.

[15:58] In Ephesians 4.29 it says, Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying. Building people up.

[16:09] That they minister grace to the hearers. We want that kind of communication, don't we? A communication that builds people up. That lifts people. That encourages. That is not a corrupt communication.

[16:21] There's enough of that. On the airwaves. And the skywaves. Isn't there? Through the idiot box. There's much godless communication. And corrupt communication.

[16:32] We want to counteract that. In our homes. And in our conversation. And it means a listening to one another. That godly communication. It means a forgiving one another.

[16:43] It means a seeking the interests of others. That's what godly communication is all about. So we see a godly order in a home. We see a godly communication.

[16:54] That we can aspire to. Another aspect is a godly discipline. A godly discipline in the home. We show our love to our children at times by setting boundaries.

[17:10] By establishing authority. By loving authority. In nurture and admonition of the Lord. As that familiar one goes in Proverbs 22. Verse 6.

[17:21] Train up a child in the way he should go. And when he is old. He will not depart from it. And we know there aren't godly families. Where children don't follow the same pathway.

[17:34] We can still keep praying. Can't we? Parents so affected. You can still keep praying. For those that are straying from the path. You've given that which is truth to them.

[17:45] As they've grown up. And God will help. Still. Convict and draw them unto himself. Train up a child in the way he should go.

[17:56] It says. Of that godly discipline. He that spareth his rod. Hateth his son. He that loveth him. Chasteneth him. Be times or promptly.

[18:08] So there's a promptness to the discipline. And the use of a rod. It's called for. It shows love. The world will think. Wow.

[18:19] That's radical. The Bible says that. Loving discipline. Is necessary. And it's. Commended. And we know.

[18:31] We're not talking about. A child abuse. Or any such thing. We're talking about. Godly loving discipline. It says. Chasten thy son. While there is hope.

[18:42] And let not thy soul spare. For he's crying. Proverbs 19. Verse 18. There's a godly. Discipline. That is good for us.

[18:53] And we. Old people. I'm talking about. People like me. We're great here. We need it too. I need. Some godly discipline. We all need discipline. We heard about discipleship.

[19:04] This morning. We need. To have that discipline. Godly disciplines. The discipline. Of study. Of fellowship. Of prayer. Of. Memorising.

[19:15] And meditating. On God's word. We all need. Godly discipline. And as parents. We want to help our children. To grow. As strong. Trees. As strong.

[19:25] As strong vines. As it were. To have strength. And that can come. As we heard this morning. Through the hard times. I know. It's been said that. The stronger trees.

[19:36] Are those that have braced the storms. And so it is when. We. As godly parents. Seek. To bring our children up. In that fear. That admonition. That discipline. That training.

[19:47] That. There will be times. Well. They'll have to. Take. That authority. You know. We're living in a world. Where.

[19:58] That's very lacking. It's lacking. And we see that. I know. I wouldn't want to be a teacher. These days. That thing. To see what. Some folk have to. Manage. In the school place.

[20:09] When. Children. Who. Have never had that discipline. Just run riot. You know. There's a story told. In Colorado. There was. A man. He sued his parents.

[20:20] He sued his parents. For. $350,000. On the grounds. Of malpractice. Of parenting. So you don't have one of those lawsuits. Do you? So. Parents.

[20:30] And grandparents. We've got to watch it. We've got to watch it. The mum and dad. Had boxed his upbringing. So badly. That he charged in his suit. That he would need years. Of costly. Psychiatric treatment.

[20:41] You know. Maybe if he'd got a few more paddles. When he was growing up. It wouldn't have happened. But brother and sister. It's been in godly. Discipline. Godly discipline. You know. There was a Harvard University study.

[20:52] Of family life. And makes a powerful case. For the traditional family structure. It found basically. So goes the children. So goes the culture. Or so goes the family.

[21:03] So goes society. So we've seen many troubles in society today. I put it to you. That I would say some of it. Certainly in part would stem. From a lack of godly discipline.

[21:15] From lack of rules. Of course rules without morals lead to children without character. Talking about godly frameworks. And Ephesians 6. We read. Children.

[21:26] Obey your parents. For this is right. Honour thy father and thy mother. Which is the first commandment. With promise. That it may be well with you. And you may live long on the earth.

[21:39] And ye fathers. Provoke not your children to wrath. But bring them up. In the nurture. And admonition. Of the Lord. Godly parenting. Is commanded. Is commanded.

[21:49] Godly parenting. Will lead the children. And we'll see. A development. And a growth. That will be good for them. And you won't get sued. Hopefully. So.

[22:00] We see a godly order. We see a godly communication. We see a godly discipline. And lastly. A godly heritage. When we see those. Building blocks.

[22:10] Of the Christian home. As it were. A godly order. A godly communication. A godly discipline. There's many more we could say. But these are just some. We see a godly heritage.

[22:22] A godly heritage. I know we hear of a preacher. We've had him. Share with us before. And he's got the. View of.

[22:34] Multi-generational faithfulness. As we see. Children. Grandchildren. We see. Parents. Grandparents. It doesn't always happen.

[22:45] But we can see. Where there's a godly heritage. Can happen. A godly heritage. And I personally can thank God. For godly parents. Myself. They weren't always godly.

[22:56] I can remember. When my mum and dad were. Smoking like a train. And acting. Pretty bad. Well. They weren't all that bad. But they were still sinners. And. And. But thank God.

[23:08] They got saved. They trusted Christ. As their lord and saviour. And there was a transformation. And not only in their lives. But in their children. And their grandchildren. And their great grandchildren.

[23:19] I trust. A godly heritage. A godly heritage. We read of that in Psalm 78. It says. Give ear. O my people. To my lord.

[23:30] And verse 3. Which we have heard and known. And our fathers have told us. We will not hide them. From their children. Showing to the generation to come. The praises of the lord.

[23:41] And his strength. And his wonderful works. That he hath done. It goes on. Verse 5. They should make them known. To their children. That the generation to come. Might know them.

[23:52] Even the children. Which should be born. Who should arise. And declare them. To their children. That they might set their hope in God. And not forget the works of God. But keep his commandments.

[24:03] And might not be. As their fathers. A stubborn and rebellious generation. A generation that set not. Their heart aright. And whose spirit was not steadfast. With God.

[24:14] God. Now through the pages of the Old Testament. We see various kings. And various families. They don't always follow one another. Some are godly.

[24:25] Some are godless. But we see. Oft times there is a. A consecutive godly. Nature. To some of the kings. And to some of the.

[24:36] Recorded. Men and women of God. Through. The pages of scripture. There was a godly heritage. As we say. It wasn't always the case. Sometimes there was. A king who was godless.

[24:47] Who was apostate. Who was an idolatrous king. Who. Forsook. God. And the truth. And that might be the case for you.

[24:58] I know there's. There's some folk. There was a young man this morning. Who was telling me that. His parents were. Were not Christians. And that can be. A tougher.

[25:09] Situation. I'm sure. But we can thank God. We that are godly. Parents. And grandparents. God helping us. We can see. We can pray for our children.

[25:20] And our grandchildren. Can't we? And I trust. We will see fruit. For that prayer. Of course we know. It's ultimately a personal step. It's ultimately. God's will. As to who.

[25:31] Is saved. But we can. Have an influence. As godly. Parents. And we all want to see. A godly heritage. A godly legacy. That's left behind us.

[25:42] That there'll be something. Left behind us. When we're gone. When we're just ashes. Or dust. There'll still be something. Left behind. There'll still be some. Following Christ. In part.

[25:54] Our influence. Has played. Some. Some measure. In that. Step. That they take. And there's a famous study. That's. Been undertaken. Some of you might have heard this before.

[26:06] About. A. Couple of families. Who lived in the state. Of New York. It's a familiar story. You might have heard it before. There's one man. His name was Max. Jukes.

[26:17] He did not believe in. Religion. And he was not. A saved man. And he married a girl. Of the same opinion. And from this union. Of these two.

[26:27] Came 1,026 descendants. And studies showed. That 300. Died prematurely. 100. 100. Were sent to the penitentiary. They went to jail. For various crimes.

[26:39] 190. Sold themselves to vice. Into immorality. Prostitution. 100. Were drunkards. In the family. It was reckoned. This one family.

[26:50] Of Max. Jukes. And his descendants. Cost the state of New York. Over 1 million dollars. And that was. In those days. So. Certainly. A great cost to the state. Another man.

[27:01] Jonathan Edwards. Believed in God. Of the same time period. And he married a Christian woman. And. They were of light character. From this union.

[27:13] 729 descendants. Were studied. And they discovered. That 300 were preachers. 65 were college professors. 13 were university presidents.

[27:23] 6 were authors. And 3 were congressmen. And 1 was a vice president. Of the United States. What a difference. Between those two streams.

[27:34] Two legacies. Two heritages. Friends. Well we have a godly heritage. Low children are a heritage.

[27:45] Of the Lord. The fruit. Of the word. Is his reward. Psalm 127. Verse 3. It's a reward. Now there's some rewards. Still in the cooker. Here in this church.

[27:56] There's still. There's still some. On the way. You know. We. Our. One of our grandchildren. Is still in the oven. As well. As it were. Just ready to pop.

[28:07] Pretty soon. And. Children. Are a heritage. Of the Lord. They're a blessing. They're a blessing. Even. Even when. They can act up. And test us.

[28:18] And your children. Will learn from you. Fathers. Mothers. Your children. Are watching you. Your children. Are watching you. I've heard it said.

[28:29] That what. The. Parents allow. In moderation. The children. Will. Undertake. To access. You know. We need to be good examples. We need to be good. Models. And.

[28:40] I know. I haven't always been such. Myself. And I. I'm ashamed. That I wasn't more. Of a testimony. When I look back. In my life.

[28:50] And we can all think. How can I be. A better testimony. How can I be. A better witness. A better example. To my children. And my grandchildren. How can it be. That they can be.

[29:01] A heritage. Of the Lord. As our children. Watch us. And friends. We want to pray. Let's pray. Let's pray. Let's pray. Let's pray. That God will help us. To be. Godly men.

[29:12] And women. Godly mums. And dads. Grandfathers. And grandmothers. And great ones. That there will be a godly purpose. There will be a godly character.

[29:24] There will be a godly heritage. Pray. That you will. Hear the scriptures. There will be a godly communication.

[29:38] You will speak. With that. Conversation. Where Christ is preeminent. There will be a godly discipline. Where you will exercise. Loving authority.

[29:50] And there will be a godly heritage. Friends. It takes a godly decision. A godly decision. In Joshua 24. Verse 15. There was a place. Where there was a.

[30:02] A crossroads. As it were. And. Where the people. Had. A choice to make. And Joshua. Spoke to the people.

[30:14] And he said. If it seem evil unto you. To serve the Lord. Choose you this day. Whom you will serve. Whether the gods. Which your fathers served.

[30:24] That were on the other side. Of the flood. Or the gods of the Amorites. In whose land you dwell. But. As for me.

[30:35] And my house. We will. Serve the Lord. That's a good choice. Isn't it? That's a good choice. We can make. And friends. So let's. Take. Those.

[30:47] Necessary steps. That we can take. And for some. It might be. There's still broken homes. There's still broken relationships. There's still an influence. That you can play. Even still.

[30:59]  As God helps you.ยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยยย