Well, good evening.
Happy Fourth of July weekend.
Greg and Chris here are keeping a high line if you've been watching the World Cup.
They're my defensive high line, keeping me from even getting closer to you as I preach.
But that's all right.
We're glad you guys are sitting up in the front.
And we're glad all of you are here tonight.
We're continuing in a series in the Sermon on the Mount.
And so we're going to be looking at that in a minute.
This weekend, my son, Eli, went to a birthday party.
And the theme was pirates, which is perfect.
He's five years old, about to be six.
And he loved it.
He got a bandana.
He got an eye patch.
He came home with a glow-in-the-dark sword.
We were able to take to the fireworks on Saturday night and enjoy its glow-in-the-darkness as he ran around before the fireworks began at dusk.
And so as we came home, he said, Daddy, can we play pirates tonight?
We said, no, we've got to go to bed.
Can we play pirates tomorrow?
Yes, we can play pirates tomorrow.
I woke up in the morning.
I had other things to do.
Daddy, can we play pirates?
Yes, yes, we can play pirates sometime.
But, you know, at the end of the day, I didn't actually end up playing pirates with him.
It's not that I didn't intend to at one level, but at the end of the day, I wanted to do other things more.
And later in the day, the Lord convicted me that I didn't do what I had said I would do.
I was convicted that I didn't keep my word the way I ought to.
And, you know, I've been reflecting on this theme a little bit.
We'll see it in our passage in a few minutes.
But I've reflected that our culture has experienced an erosion of the fidelity of spoken words,
that we say things in our culture and it doesn't matter if they're true or if we're actually intending to keep them or not.
I could name names, and I will, just to keep us awake here.
So everyone from sports people like Lance Armstrong or Marion Jones, if you remember her, the Olympic sprinter,
to some of our great political leaders, whether it be Bill Clinton or Colin Powell,
or all of these people have said things publicly and have testified that they were true,
when in fact they weren't.
We live in a culture where talk radio uses words as entertainment,
not as an exchange about truth.
And I think even in our daily lives, in our culture today,
being someone whose word is faithful and true is not as valued as it used to be.
I think that we make promises and we think,
I'll try to keep it.
I'll do my best.
I hope I can.
In a generation past, it might have been different.
I notice it sometimes in culture of making plans.
Hey, can we meet next Thursday?
Sure, let's do it.
All right, one o'clock, let's see you there.
And then I get a call the day before.
Oh, I can't make it.
Something came up.
And, you know, at one level, sometimes that happens.
But that's pretty common in our culture today.
And I think a generation ago, it would have been very different.
And I was reflecting on why is it?
Why do we do these things?
Why did I do it to my son?
Why did I say something when I really didn't mean it and hadn't thought through?
Why?
And I was realizing that for me,
it's because I want to say things as long as it's convenient for me in the moment.
I said that to my son so that Eli,
so that he'd stop bugging me, to be honest with you.
So he'd stop asking me every five minutes,
Daddy, can we play pirates?
Yes, we'll do it.
Stop talking to me.
I have other things to do.
What I realized is that if I made a promise,
yes, Eli, we will play pirates this morning,
it impinges on my freedom.
It impinges on my ability to choose.
What am I going to do this morning?
It creates an obligation for me to follow through on something.
And ultimately, it violates my selfishness.
It violates my sovereignty to do what I want to do with my time
at any moment in my life.
Keeping our word is costly because we give up the freedom to do what we want.
We live, I think, so often, I live so often at times,
in this in-the-moment ethics of I'll do whatever I need to
to get through the situation.
So what does Jesus have to say about that?
If you want to turn with me in your Bibles, page 810,
we're going to look at the Sermon on the Mount.
We're going to be starting in verse 31.
And as you turn there, just to remind you briefly,
the Sermon on the Mount is the Gospel of Matthew.
The first four chapters is laid out Jesus as this king who's come.
And as he comes, he pronounces to you, the kingdom of heaven is at hand.
And he gathers his disciples in chapter 4,
and then in the beginning of chapter 5,
he launches into this long sermon about what life in his kingdom
will really look like.
What does it look like when people are under him as king?
How are our lives transformed and changed?
And what does it look like as a result of that transformation?
And we're in this list now that starts back in verse 17
of this seven times when Jesus says,
you have heard it said, but I say to you.
Where he's talking to a bunch of Jewish people
about what they've heard said about the Old Testament
and about the old way.
And then, but I say to you,
it's this whole pattern of,
but this is what the kingdom of God is really like.
And so, this is where we're at in the Sermon on the Mount.
Look with me in verse 31, chapter 5.
It was also said,
whoever divorces him,
or whoever divorces his wife,
let him give her a certificate of divorce.
But I say to you,
that everyone who divorces his wife,
except on the grounds of sexual immorality,
makes her commit adultery,
and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
Again, you have heard it said,
you have heard that it was said to those of old,
you shall not swear falsely,
but shall perform to the Lord what you have sworn.
But I say to you,
do not take an oath at all,
either by heaven, for it is the throne of God,
or by the earth, for it is his footstool,
or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great king.
And do not take an oath by your head,
for you cannot make one hair white or black.
Let what you say be simply yes or no.
Anything more than this comes from evil.
Let's pray as we continue to look at God's word together.
God, I pray tonight that you would help us
to understand this part of your word.
Help us to understand what you are saying to us through it.
Help us to see, Lord,
how it is that you want us to live in this world
under you as our king.
Help us to understand how it is that you,
as our king, enable us to do this.
God, I pray you would help me tonight
to speak your word,
Lord, that you would be with us by your spirit.
We pray these things in Jesus' name.
Amen.
So what does the kingdom of God look like
in issues of marriage
and of taking oaths?
Neither of these are probably the things
that jump to our mind
about how to think about topics,
but they're ones that Jesus feels like
are so important
that he includes them in this sermon.
So we're going to look at them in this order
and try to explain or understand
how it is,
what it is that Jesus is saying to us.
So as we look at verses 31 and 32,
let me just,
as we dive into this particular passage,
this particular passage,
a brief pastoral note,
the issue of divorce is a particularly painful one
in our culture today.
It's a particularly difficult one
because it's a pain that many people have gone through.
And there's a huge diversity of views on it
in our world.
And I want to say tonight
that I want to speak faithfully
from the scriptures,
what it says,
but I want you to also know
that in my pastoral counseling
and in my care,
and even for some of you,
I want you to know
that I know how painful it can be.
If this is something
that has been a part of your story
up until now,
please know that God's heart
and my heart for you
is that you'd experience
the grace of the gospel
in the midst of that pain.
So let me just start with that
and we'll come around at the end
when we talk about some application.
This may be a hard word for some of us.
It's going to challenge
some of our cultural assumptions potentially,
but it's a good word for us.
So let's look at it together.
Jesus begins in verse 31
and he's talking about,
he jumps right into the issue of divorce,
but one of the things
that's really important to see
is that there's an assumption
that Jesus is making.
He's starting with an assumption
as he's talking about marriage
that a vow was made.
A vow was made between two people
to have and to hold
from this day forward
for better, for worse,
for richer, for poorer,
in sickness and in health,
to love and to cherish
till death do us part.
That's the old classic prayer book
vows that happen in a wedding.
And Jesus is assuming
that that's the basis
upon which marriage
has been entered into.
And in light of that then,
he's trying to deal with something
that was going on
in the first century
that was based on an understanding
of a part of the Old Testament law.
If you went back to Deuteronomy 24,
verses 1 through 4,
you would see this long sentence
that says,
now if a man divorces his wife
and gives her a certificate of divorce
and then he marries another one
and then he divorces that wife
and then,
and it has this long set of conditions
that seems to be,
when you read it carefully,
the whole point is,
of the law in Deuteronomy
is to say
that if you've divorced someone,
you can't remarry them
after they've married someone
and been divorced again.
Okay?
That seems to be actually
the point of it.
And it's, at some level,
a pretty obscure part of the law
and its purpose,
as you look at it in context,
is to deal with
what happens when marriage doesn't work
the way it's supposed to.
Right?
What happens when marriage
isn't all,
isn't all that we hope it would be?
What happens when divorce,
and, and the particular regulations
were meant to protect
and to care for people
in the middle of this broken situation.
Okay?
So that's the Deuteronomy context
from which this idea
of a certificate of divorce
came about.
Now, in the first century,
and you can read through,
there were rabbinical schools
that taught,
that sort of had a debate
about how did this happen.
There's a conservative school
that said,
well, there is this thing,
but really,
this certificate of divorce
can only be given
in very,
in a very circumscribed
set of conditions.
And then there was
a broader category
under the Rabbi Hillel,
actually,
whose name is still
kicked around today,
where, in fact,
it had a very expansive view
that a man could divorce his wife
for all sorts of reasons.
In fact, it specified
that he could divorce his wife
because she burned the food
or simply because
he found another woman
that he liked better
than his wife.
It was a very broad understanding.
And somehow,
in the first century,
this text in Deuteronomy
that had a very narrow,
circumstantial application
became the basis
for a whole theology
of men who were saying,
I can leave my wife
whenever I feel like it,
whenever it seems good to me,
whenever I don't like
something about her,
or I like something else more.
This viewpoint
was what Jesus was addressing
in verses 31 and 32.
Look at it with me again.
It was said,
whoever divorces his wife,
let him give her
a certificate of divorce.
Okay?
So he's saying,
that's what the old law is.
And in that
was all of this understanding
of this expansive freedom
for men to just
abandon their wives
and give them
a certificate of divorce
so they could remarry
someone else
so they wouldn't be abandoned.
And in the first century society,
that would be a terrible thing
because a woman
who had been divorced
was basically on her own
and she'd have very little means
to support herself.
She would have very little opportunity
to take care of herself.
And it's really,
it would,
so that certificate of divorce
was not completely
without merit.
But he's,
but this was the understanding of it.
And then he goes on,
he says,
but I say to you,
everyone who divorces his wife,
except on the grounds
of sexual immorality,
makes her commit adultery,
and whoever marries a divorced woman
commits adultery.
What is he saying here?
Turn with me really quickly
to Matthew 19.
You don't have to,
we're not going to read the whole thing,
but it's really helpful
to see that Jesus kind of
summarizes in this passage
in verse 5
what he's saying
more broadly in verse 19.
The Pharisees come to him
and say,
you know,
when is it lawful to divorce?
And Jesus expansively says,
you're asking me about,
on what conditions
can I break my promise
of marriage?
And he comes back
and he says,
he quotes from Genesis
and he says
that God created humanity,
male and female,
and that the two,
right,
that a man,
verse 4,
right,
God,
in the beginning
he made the male and female
and then he said,
and he's quoting from Genesis 2,
now,
therefore,
a man shall leave
his father and his mother
and hold fast to his wife
and the two shall become
one flesh.
They are no longer two,
but one flesh,
what therefore God
has joined together,
let not man separate.
So people are coming to him
saying,
hey,
what are the grounds
on which I can do this?
And he's saying,
whoa,
let's step back
and make sure we get
the right things right first.
God wants you to understand
what he's doing in marriage.
Marriage is this sacred,
beautiful union
that he has created
and it was in the very fabric
of creating humanity
that men and women
would come together
in this marital relationship
and in their coming together
the two would become
one flesh
and they would become
a union
that is not simply
a contract.
It's not simply
a mutually beneficial
agreement
for as long as they both think
that it's beneficial,
but instead
it's a mystical,
spiritual,
but very real union
where two become
one flesh.
Right?
It's like
when I was in high school
I went to this
Saturday morning
like science thing
and I don't remember
very much.
I was a history major.
My science acumen
was pretty low,
but I remember
they did really cool experiments.
That's what I remember.
We like stuck a rose
in liquid nitrogen
and shattered it
and that was really cool
and we figured out
about gravity
and deceleration.
One of the things
we did was polymers.
Right?
And I can't tell you
a bit about
the chemistry of polymers,
but all I know
is that polymers
can be made
where you take two things
and you stick them together.
Right?
And the place
where they gather together,
all I remember
is this big jar.
You guys,
some of you are chemistry majors.
You're like,
yeah, I know exactly
what you're talking about.
A big jar that was clear
and had a blue liquid on top
and a red liquid on the bottom
and the guy reached in
with some tweezers
and grabbed the place
where those two things met
and he started to pull it out.
And the place
where those two things
came together,
a polymer was formed
by the chemical reaction
between the two of them
and the fiber of it
became something else.
And once he pulled it out,
you couldn't then
separate it back out
into blue and red.
It was a new thing.
And this is what God
does in marriage.
He takes two people,
two independent people
created in the image of God
and he brings them together
in a union
that is unique,
that is special,
and that is meant
to be lifelong.
And that union
is meant to be
unbroken.
Marriage vows
unseat our
independent selfishness
by saying,
I'm committing to you.
And it's a huge cost,
isn't it?
For those of you
who are married,
it's a huge cost
to say,
I will have you
no matter what.
But in that,
there's a great gift.
There's joy
and freedom
and beauty
and power
in that two
becoming one
in that union.
And so when Jesus
hears a question
about divorce,
he goes back
and he wants
to remind you,
God wants you
to maintain
your marriage.
That's the first thing
he wants you to do.
And he wants you
to recognize
that any time
divorce happens,
it's a rending
of something
that was meant
to be together.
It's trying
to pull apart
a polymer.
And he goes on
and he says,
oh,
and if adultery
has happened,
that's already
been a rending
of that relationship.
And so that may be
a case where divorce
may be legitimate.
But if it's not,
if you divorce someone
for some other reason
and then you send
them out
and the assumption
is they would get remarried,
then you make
your spouse
an adulterer.
If you divorce
your wife
and she goes out
and she's alone
in the world,
well, of course
she's going to remarry.
But by remarrying,
she's now,
you've now rent
the thing
that God
has put together
and sent her off
to do this thing
that she ought
not to do.
So Jesus
is saying to us,
this is life
in the kingdom
where we take
very seriously
our marriage vows.
We count the cost.
We count the cost
of the loss
of our freedom
when we enter
into it.
And we don't
take lightly
divorce
because divorce
is a violation
of those vows
and of the meaning
that God gave
to marriage.
marriage.
And even
when divorce
may be legitimate,
it is only
in the context
where that marriage
has already
been broken.
Biblically,
there are a few
other grounds.
Desertion
is the one
most obvious one
where you're
abandoned
by a spouse.
There are other
grounds
potentially
where divorce
may be
legitimate
biblically.
But I think
we maybe live
in a culture
where we're
very much
like the first
century,
where people
think,
hey,
we're going
to get married
as long as
it's convenient
for us.
And, you know,
I mean,
what's the classic
line when you
read celebrities
who break up?
Irreconcilable
differences.
We're still
friends,
we just don't
want to be
married anymore.
God wants us
to take our
vows far,
far more
seriously than
that because
he has made
it far,
far more
significant
than that.
For those
of you who
aren't married
and for those
of you who
are married,
another
implication of
this is to
recognize that
the physical
union of
sex is
meant to be
a consummation
of a marriage
relationship.
And so it's
really significant.
And adultery
is a rending
of that.
And sexual
union outside
of marriage
is a violation
of God's
intended purpose
for that.
We need to
recognize that
this is meant
to be a hole
for us
in God's
kingdom.
And again,
to recognize
that our
selfish use
of our
physical bodies
with other
people outside
of marriage
is not
characteristic
of God's
kingdom.
God wants
us to count
the cost
of living
in his
kingdom
and pursue
sexual purity
in our
lives.
Finally,
why is this
so important
to God?
Well,
you should read
the book of
Hosea.
It'll talk
about how
faithful God
is to his
promises to
his people,
even in the
face of
unfaithfulness.
Even he
talks about
his people
as being
prostituting
spiritual
people who
run around
and sleep
with other
gods spiritually.
And yet,
in it,
there's this
picture of a
God who
relentlessly
pursues his
people.
He will be
faithful to
his promises
to pursue
his love
that he
has set
on his
people.
And marriage
is meant
to be a
physical
picture of
that in
the world.
So,
Jesus says,
this is what
it looks like
in the
kingdom as
we think
about marriage.
And then he
goes on,
he talks
about oaths.
Go back
to Matthew
6,
if you're,
or Matthew
5,
starting in
verse 33.
Now,
I don't know
how many of
you grew up
with the
King James
Bible,
but you
even see
it here
in verse
33.
And you've
heard it
said to
those of
old,
you shall
not swear
falsely.
When I was
growing up,
the only part
of that I
ever heard
was,
you should
not swear,
which I
thought meant
don't curse,
don't use
foul language
towards other
people,
because that's
ungodly,
that's bad,
don't do
that.
I thought
it was just
about not
having a
clean mouth
instead of
having a
potty mouth.
But it's
not that
at all.
Right here,
what he's
talking about
is making
an oath,
making a
promise,
or swearing
by something
in two
contexts.
One,
when you're
publicly
testifying,
right?
So if you
go into
a courtroom,
I swear to
tell the
truth,
the whole
truth,
nothing but
the truth,
so help
me God,
right?
You put
your hand
on a
Bible,
you put
your hand
up in
the air,
and you
swear that
you're
going to
testify that
what you
are saying
is true.
Or the
other time
is sometimes
we use it
to try to
give greater
weight to
a promise.
I swear
in my
mother's
grave,
I'll be
there.
Right?
Sometimes we
even vote
God,
by God,
I promise
I will be
there.
And when
we say it
that way,
what we
mean is,
in the
old-fashioned
sense of
it,
may God
judge me
if I
do not
do what
I say
I'm going
to do.
It's calling
God as
a witness.
And so you
see this in
the Old
Testament at
times.
You see
people making
oaths,
you see
them swearing
even by
the name
of God.
In fact,
this is what
the third
commandment is
about in
Exodus 20
verse 7.
You shall
not take the
Lord's name
in vain.
Again,
most of the
time I
thought that
just meant
don't curse,
don't use
Jesus' name
when you
stubbed your
toe and
you're really
angry.
Right?
But what
he's actually
saying is
don't swear
by God.
Don't
presume
to bring
God in
and to
make him
the guarantor
that your
word is
true.
There are
other places,
Leviticus 19,
Numbers 30,
Deuteronomy 31,
where there
are other
places where
you see
what Jesus
is referring
to in the
Old Testament
basically saying
don't swear
by the
Lord falsely.
If you
swear by
the Lord,
you better
make sure
you do
it because
otherwise
God will
come and
judge you.
That's the
Old Testament
picture that
you see.
But by the
first century,
the Jewish
rabbis,
the Pharisees
had developed
an incredibly
complex
system
by which
you could
swear
by some
things and
you'd have
to do it
and it
would mean
it.
And you
could swear
by other
things and
if you did
it, it's
okay, but
if you
didn't, it's
okay too.
Right?
It's kind of
like when in
grade school
you'd like,
yeah, I
promise I'll
come over to
your house
after school
but I'm
not going
to come
because I
crossed my
fingers behind
my back.
Right?
So there
was this
whole system
whereby, and
it was a
religiously
sanctioned
system whereby
you could
swear some
things and
you kind of
had to do
them but
then you
could swear
other things
and it
didn't matter
if you did
them or not.
Right?
And people
were selfishly
using this
system to
manipulate their
words with
others in
order to get
what they
wanted, in
order to
manage their
life so that
they wouldn't
be over
committed.
They wouldn't
lose their
freedom by
actually having
to follow
through with
the things
that they
said.
And that's
why Jesus
says, but
I tell you,
don't make
an oath at
all.
Let your
yes be
yes and
your no be
no.
It doesn't
matter what
you swear
by.
And part
of what he's
getting at
is if you
swear by the
throne of
God, you're
swearing by
God himself.
If you
swear by
earth, well
that's no
better because
the earth is
God's footstool.
If you swear by
Jerusalem, well
that's no better
because that's the
city of the
king.
If you swear by
your own head,
the fact is you
don't have any
sovereignty over
your own head.
God is the
one who makes
your hair white
or black or
brown or whatever
it is.
And so no
matter what you're
swearing by in
this world,
ultimately you're
swearing by God.
And Jesus
says, in my
kingdom you
should not
need to
swear by God
because you
can simply let
your yes be
yes and your
no be no.
no.
How hard is
this for us to
let our yes be
yes and our no
be no?
When you make a
promise to meet
someone for lunch
and it becomes
inconvenient, how
hard do you work
to keep your
appointment?
I know this is
unlikely in our
current economic
culture, but if you
have two job
offers, do you
play them along
for a while to
figure out how
you can get the
best deal out of
it?
How quick are
you to make
sure that when
people say things
about you that
sound good but
may not be true,
that you are
willing to
clarify to make
sure that your
presentation of
truth is consistent
and real?
How about your
big promises?
Things like
marriage, things
like financial
commitments to
other people.
I'll pay my
bills.
Part of that is
because you've
made a promise in
some ways.
I get a service
from you and I'm
going to pay you.
I'm going to do
everything I can to
follow through to be
a person whose word
is trustworthy in
that.
When we follow this,
we need to recognize
that it's costly,
isn't it?
It's costly to keep
our marriage vows no
matter what.
It's costly to keep
our word no
matter what.
It's costly for me
to say to my
young son,
yes, Eli, I will
play pirates with
you and to put
everything else
aside, all the
other things I
hope to do that
day, all the
other things I
think I need to
do that day,
and simply to be
with him because I
told him that I
would be.
I would be.
Why does Jesus
care about this so
much?
Well, because he
wants us to be
characteristic of us
in his kingdom
because it's
characteristic of
him.
In 2 Corinthians
chapter 1, the
apostle Paul is
writing to the
church in
Corinth, and
they've accused
him of
waffling.
Are you
coming or
are you not
coming?
Are you
coming or
are you not
coming?
He said, I
am coming.
I'm doing
everything.
Verse 17, he
says, what is I
vacillating when I
wanted to do this?
Do I make plans
according to my
flesh and say yes,
yes, and no, no,
at the same time?
As surely as God
is faithful, our
word to you has
not been yes and
no.
For the Son of
God, Jesus Christ,
whom we proclaimed
among you, Silvanus
and Timothy and I,
was not yes and no,
but in him it is
always yes.
For all the
promises of God
find their yes in
him.
That is why it is
through him that we
utter our amen to
God for his glory.
Friends, this is why
it's so important for
God's people in God's
kingdom to be people
who keep their word
because we follow a
God who has kept his
word.
And he has kept his
word by promising to
redeem for himself a
people from every tribe
and tongue and nation.
If you listen to the
scripture from 1 Peter
that was read earlier,
that God was going to
gather people from every
tribe and nation not
because they were
righteous, but because
they were sinful people.
And in gathering them
to be his people, he
knew that he could not
simply overlook their
sin for that would be
not keeping his word
because his word is that
sin must be punished, that
evil must be dealt
with.
But he counted the cost of
that promise that he
made.
And he sent his own son,
Jesus Christ.
And in Jesus Christ, all
the promises, the promise
to punish sin, the promise
to rescue people who are
sinful and to make them his
own.
Those promises are kept in
Jesus because Jesus came
and lived the sinless life
that we couldn't live and
died the death that we
deserve for our sin and
rose from the dead so that
in him he could both be
just in punishing sin and
the justifier, that is, the
one who welcomes in ungodly
people and accepts them
because of what Jesus has
done.
He counted the cost, the
cost of his very own son when
he set his love on us and
pursued us.
He counted the cost and he
gave Christ for us so that in
Christ all the promises of God
might be yes for us.
And friends, because Jesus has
paid this price for us, because
he has given us new life in
him, because he works then in
our heart to know God, we are
able now to count the cost and be
men and women of our word in our
marriages and in every other
context.
Let's pray.
God, these are sobering words, for
they challenge us to think about
how we live in very practical
ways.
God, I pray that you would help
us, Lord, to think deeply about
what it really looks like to live
in your kingdom.
Lord, I pray you would expose our
selfishness and the ways that we
so easily want to live for
ourselves.
God, I pray that we would see
Christ who did not live for
himself but gave himself up for
us so that, Lord, we might become
his.
And in seeing him, we might know
how to walk down this path of being
oath keepers, vow keepers, people
who pursue your kingdom for your
glory, for your name's sake.
We pray this in Jesus' name.
Amen.