WEBVTT

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 Take your problems this morning, turn over to Hebrews chapter 5, Hebrews chapter 5 this morning,

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!

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 Parenting with Patience.

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 And part of parenting, and Father's Day I think is important because the Bible tells us that

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 the father sets the tone in the home.

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 You know, as a father you are a guide, a direction, you set a direction for the home.

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 That's the biblical reality that we are to live under, that the father has that influence

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 and that direction.

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 You know, and we understand the picture that is there.

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 And we're going to look today at a very important dynamic because unless the Lord is part of

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 your household, the Bible tells us that you build it in vain.

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 Unless the Lord gives and guides and directs, and as believers we ought to desire to listen

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 to what God says and not what a so-called expert might say.

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 Because you know what, I've learned one thing over the years, usually the designer is the

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 best expert on something.

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 If they designed it, they understand every parameter around it.

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 How it's to function, what it's to do, all the nuances and details of things about it.

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 And so this morning we're going to be looking at a very important topic when it comes to

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 dads and even moms.

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 Because it has to do with families and that's raising of our children.

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 But to discipline with love.

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 To discipline with love.

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 You know, that's an important element because discipline is that, because you think about

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 what's the purpose of discipline?

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 What's the purpose of disciplining a child?

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 That's something that every parent, everybody that works with kids needs to understand and

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 get a picture of what is the purpose.

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 What is the objective?

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 What did God design how for this to work?

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 Because some people get the idea that discipline is to punish a child for what they've done.

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 But it's also, when you consider biblically, it's to prepare them for who they are to become.

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 Punishment for just the moment is in the moment.

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 Now we're going to look at those things because punishment is a means of character building.

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 Used appropriately can be beneficial.

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 Because certain things need dealt with in the moment.

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 But when you deal with those things, we're going to see here this morning from the Word

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 of God that you need to understand the why are you doing it.

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 Are you doing it for the moment?

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 Are you doing it for what you want them to become?

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 Because what they are to become is what God designed the family to do.

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 Because remember, you're not raising children.

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 You ought to be raising mature adults.

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 Adults who understand and have grown and matured to do what they ought to do,

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 and especially in following the Lord.

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 And so today we're going to be looking on this Father's Day at Hebrews 12 here,

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 and it gives us really a parenting model.

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 And the model we have is God to his children.

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 But you know what?

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 The same model applies for parents today to our children.

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 And this is important because whether you're a parent or a grandparent,

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 no matter what you did or what backgrounds you came from or how things used to operate,

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 I want you to grab a hold of today, we need to do things God's way,

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 and not the world's way or some expert's way.

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 You know, it's always amazed me as over the years as I've looked and seen how many experts

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 write books about children who have never had kids.

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 You know?

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 It's like, why would you want to listen to somebody who has no experience?

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 Because dealing with children and disciplining them and directing them in the direction they ought to go

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 is a very complex thing.

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 It's complex in many ways.

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 But let's look this morning.

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 If you found Hebrews chapter 12,

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 I encourage you to stand here together with me as we look together in God's Word.

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 And we'll read a few verses here, then we'll pray,

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 and then we'll get in to the message here this morning.

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 But look what the Word of God tells us.

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 And it says,

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 And ye have forgotten the exhortation which speaketh unto you as unto children.

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 My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord,

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 nor faint when thou art rebuked of him.

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 For whom the Lord loveth, he chasteneth,

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 and scourges every son whom he receiveth.

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 If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons.

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 For what son is he whom the Father chasteneth not?

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 But if ye be without chastisement, whereof all are partakers,

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 then are ye bastards and not sons.

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 Furthermore, we have had fathers of our flesh, which corrected us,

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 and we gave them reverence.

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 Shall we not much rather be in subjection unto the Father of spirits and live?

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 For they verily for a few days chastened us after their own pleasure.

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 But he for our profit that we might be partakers of his holiness.

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 Now, no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous.

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 Nevertheless, afterward, it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness

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 unto them which are exercised thereby.

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 Let's pray.

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 Heavenly Fathers, we come before you this morning.

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 Lord, as we take a few moments to look into your word here,

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 this principle of chastisement or correction.

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 Lord, that we find here of the example that you give to us.

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 And that, Lord, is an example of your love for us.

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 Lord, that you chastise your children.

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 Lord, you don't treat us evil or against what is for our benefit.

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 But, Lord, as we look at these things today,

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 Lord, help us to grab a hold of those things in a mighty way of just the principles of your word,

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 that that might be the driving factor in all that we do.

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 And, Lord, we ask it all in your precious name.

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 Amen.

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 You may be seated.

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 As we look today, when it comes to discipline and disciplining children,

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 there's a lot of different ideas out there today.

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 And I think oftentimes parents are oftentimes afraid to discipline.

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 We live in a culture where parents are sometimes afraid to discipline their children.

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 Sometimes laziness may be an element for some,

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 but a lot of times I think parents are just afraid.

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 They don't know what to do or how to do it to make sure that it's accomplished in the right way.

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 And sometimes that's because of the direction and the information they've been given.

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 They're afraid because they've been told over and over that,

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 well, if you correct them, you're going to hurt little Johnny's feelings.

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 Or, you know, you're going to warp them in some ideology of a mental capacity of some kind.

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 And we find here that culture has pushed that direction.

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 You know, we find for decades the culture around us has prized a child's comfort over a child's character.

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 You know, the objective of raising up children is to give them character.

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 Now, they may be a character, but they need to have character.

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 There's a difference.

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 Okay?

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 Now, when we look at that reality of character,

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 until the very word discipline sometimes gets twisted around,

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 because oftentimes when people hear discipline, they hear cruelty.

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 That's the mindset.

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 And there are some cases of that that take place.

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 That's very real.

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 And we understand that dynamic of physical correction.

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 Some people automatically connect any type of physical correction with abuse.

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 I want you to understand there's a difference.

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 There's a distinct difference.

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 And we need to understand what that difference is and how it's different

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 when it comes to discipline.

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 Because we can oftentimes get caught up in that idea or imagery,

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 and we're worried about those things.

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 You know, we find parents today are afraid of corporal punishment

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 because they're afraid somebody might turn them in.

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 Now, I want you to understand that while that may be a legitimate thing,

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 it doesn't remove your responsibility before God to deal with your children correctly.

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 To understand that what God has instructed us is more important than anything else.

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 Because when a mother or a father who gives even measured loving correction,

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 you know, I'm a firm believer in corporal punishment,

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 but it ought not to be administered in anger,

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 it ought to be administered in patience with direction.

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 Because we're going to look here today that sometimes a little bit of pain goes a long ways

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 in the moment to deal with the thought process.

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 And it's a means of communicating the right thing that's short-lived

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 in a sense that it's not causing them a harm,

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 but it's getting their attention to understand that choices have consequences.

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 And we have to balance those things because when we understand that God's Word does not blur the line

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 between discipline and abuse,

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 because correction given in anger or rage is sin.

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 I want you to understand that has to do with the heart of the person administering.

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 What's your purpose?

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 You know, for years we've had a lot of that where people disciplined out of their own anger

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 instead of looking to say,

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 how is this benefiting to build the character of the child?

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 What's the purpose behind it?

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 How does that play out?

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 And we're going to look at some of these things here this morning

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 that this generation that we live in

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 has quietly set loving correction down

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 and picked up negotiation, explanation, and distraction in its place.

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 We're going to find here in Hebrews chapter 12,

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 here we're going to find here,

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 it answers that fear head on.

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 The Bible makes it very clear that God disciplines those that He loves.

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 So in other words, discipline and love are connected.

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 And we need to understand how those are connected by the image

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 and the representation of how God deals with us.

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 Because I want you to understand as parents,

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 that Word of God gives you permission to discipline your children without guilt.

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 Whatever fear has hindered you from doing what you ought to do,

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 you need to understand that the truth of God's Word

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 ought to set you free of those things.

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 To correct your child in love is not harm,

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 it's the very thing your Heavenly Father does for you.

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 You know, we need to realize when you're training a child,

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 it's helping them understand even how God corrects them.

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 And God will correct you if you're His child.

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 You say, preacher, why would He do that?

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 Because He loves you.

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 He understands that there's parameters,

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 there's things that set dynamics around you,

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 there's a fence that protects you.

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 You know, isn't that the reason we have fences?

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 It's for protection.

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 Keep certain things in and other things out.

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 God's Word gives us the placement of that fence in our life.

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 We need to teach our children that God does the same thing

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 and allow them to see that by building those things into their life.

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 And to understand there's no better day than Father's Day to say,

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 no matter what was in my past,

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 I want to move forward in the truth of God's Word.

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 Whether it's giving advice to people or helping people

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 or being a parent yourself and saying,

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 how do I do this properly?

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 Because, you know, that's the best thing you can do for your children

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 is to raise them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord,

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 correcting them and guiding them into what God would have.

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 And so we need to grab a hold of that reality.

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 You know, the Bible tells us in John 15,

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 the Word of God tells us this.

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 I want you to understand, notice what it tells us here in John 15.

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 It says,

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 I am the true vine, and the Father is the husbandman.

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 And every branch in me that beareth not fruit,

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 he taketh away.

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 And every branch that beareth fruit,

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 he purges it that it may bring forth more fruit.

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 You know what?

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 John chapter 15, Jesus is talking to his disciples.

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 He's talking to them as a father to a child dynamic,

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 but he's using an analogy of a husbandman

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 who has vines and says,

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 these vines need to be guided, directed,

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 they need to be purged.

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 Purging is that same dynamic of correction,

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 that dynamic of cutting off.

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 There is some dynamic, you might say,

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 of pain implied, discomfort implied,

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 not out of cruelty, but out of benefit.

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 To say there's a purpose behind it,

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 so it might bring forth more fruit

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 because of the guidance of those things.

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 It's the father who holds the pruning knife,

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 and notice which branch he cuts.

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 He's not talking about the dead one,

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 but the branch he cuts is the one that's bearing fruit,

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 that it will still bear more fruit.

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 Nobody thinks about pruning a bush as hurting the bush.

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 We understand that when you prune correctly,

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 what's it do?

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 It helps it multiply, helps it to grow.

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 The same thing is with your children.

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 We need to look at it,

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 is how am I helping through this to help them to grow?

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 Help them to mature,

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 to become who God wants them to be.

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 Because the God who is our perfect father

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 shows us what loving discipline looks like.

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 Not in theory, but in his own dealings with us.

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 You know, I want you to understand this morning,

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 if you've never been chastised by God,

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 you need to check your salvation.

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 That one I will say.

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 Because you know what?

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 The Bible makes it very clear that God chastises those that are his

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 because he wants them to be sanctified.

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 He wants them to mature and grow in the Lord.

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 There's going to be correction,

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 because we're going to need course correction during life.

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 But I want you to understand,

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 first thing here this morning,

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 is look here in Hebrews chapter 12, verse 6.

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 Notice what it says,

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 For whom the Lord loveth,

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 he chasteneth and scourges every son whom he receiveth.

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 Point number one this morning is this,

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 discipline is an expression of love, not anger.

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 You know what gets discipline in trouble with parents?

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 Is anger.

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 When you react with anger instead of control,

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 with patience,

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 we talked about that last week,

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 it's an important dynamic to grab a hold of

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 that the Lord loves us and he chastens us.

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 You know, love and discipline are not opposites.

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 Matter of fact, I want you to understand,

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 love and discipline are inseparable.

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 Because if you don't discipline your children,

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 you don't love them.

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 Parents today let their kids just do whatever they want to do.

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 You know what?

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 That's not love.

00:16:59.440 --> 00:17:01.160
 That's actually the opposite.

00:17:03.360 --> 00:17:06.299
 Because you're allowing them to go and to do

00:17:06.299 --> 00:17:09.799
 and to act in ways that are contrary

00:17:09.799 --> 00:17:13.039
 to them being able to grow up and mature

00:17:13.039 --> 00:17:16.360
 into the adults that God wants them to be.

00:17:17.360 --> 00:17:20.840
 Because a father who refuses to discipline his child

00:17:20.840 --> 00:17:24.100
 does not love him more, he loves him less.

00:17:25.180 --> 00:17:27.400
 You know, take a look over to Proverbs chapter 13.

00:17:27.400 --> 00:17:30.300
 Proverbs chapter 13 and verse 24.

00:17:30.759 --> 00:17:32.320
 The Bible makes it very clear.

00:17:32.460 --> 00:17:32.620
 It says,

00:17:32.800 --> 00:17:35.000
 He that spareth his rod does what?

00:17:36.220 --> 00:17:37.720
 Hateth his son.

00:17:39.080 --> 00:17:42.700
 But he that loveth him chases him betimes.

00:17:43.000 --> 00:17:44.860
 In other words, diligently,

00:17:45.600 --> 00:17:48.400
 he chastens them appropriately.

00:17:49.120 --> 00:17:50.880
 He chases them when the moment

00:17:50.880 --> 00:17:52.800
 and the direction is correct.

00:17:53.780 --> 00:17:56.040
 The discipline of love is motivated

00:17:56.039 --> 00:17:58.159
 by care for this child's future,

00:17:58.539 --> 00:18:01.039
 not frustration over the child's present.

00:18:03.339 --> 00:18:05.859
 You know, oftentimes we discipline in the present

00:18:05.859 --> 00:18:07.619
 but lose sight of the distance.

00:18:08.859 --> 00:18:10.879
 Where's this taking them to the future?

00:18:12.879 --> 00:18:14.240
 With that in mind,

00:18:14.299 --> 00:18:15.519
 it'll change what you do.

00:18:16.659 --> 00:18:18.339
 It'll change how you react.

00:18:18.460 --> 00:18:20.759
 It'll change what's guiding you.

00:18:20.759 --> 00:18:24.599
 That you might do that in the right dynamic with love.

00:18:25.559 --> 00:18:26.579
 You know, think for a moment.

00:18:26.700 --> 00:18:27.940
 Very familiar story.

00:18:28.039 --> 00:18:29.200
 And it's kind of good this morning

00:18:29.200 --> 00:18:32.279
 as we're looking at a nice ocean scene

00:18:32.279 --> 00:18:34.980
 and all the things that are going on here.

00:18:35.200 --> 00:18:36.539
 But you know, the book of Jonah.

00:18:37.859 --> 00:18:38.379
 Jonah.

00:18:39.079 --> 00:18:40.640
 God disciplined Jonah.

00:18:43.099 --> 00:18:45.359
 Jonah went a direction opposite

00:18:45.359 --> 00:18:47.000
 of what God instructed him.

00:18:47.000 --> 00:18:50.400
 God told, came to Jonah and said,

00:18:50.500 --> 00:18:51.960
 Jonah, you're to go to Nineveh

00:18:51.960 --> 00:18:55.299
 and preach that destruction's gonna come to the city

00:18:55.299 --> 00:18:56.160
 if they don't repent.

00:18:58.299 --> 00:18:59.519
 What did Jonah do?

00:19:01.680 --> 00:19:02.579
 He ran.

00:19:03.759 --> 00:19:05.099
 He ran fast.

00:19:06.480 --> 00:19:08.099
 He tried to run far.

00:19:09.819 --> 00:19:11.539
 Matter of fact, I think he made himself

00:19:11.539 --> 00:19:13.099
 thinking he got the escape.

00:19:13.099 --> 00:19:16.719
 Because it's kind of funny

00:19:16.719 --> 00:19:19.199
 that he was asleep in the ship

00:19:19.199 --> 00:19:20.959
 when the rest of the ship's waving around

00:19:20.959 --> 00:19:22.799
 like he's comfortable with where he's at.

00:19:23.659 --> 00:19:26.579
 Do an opposite of what God instructed him to do.

00:19:27.039 --> 00:19:29.199
 And we find out as we go through that account,

00:19:29.299 --> 00:19:32.559
 we won't take time to read it all this morning.

00:19:33.139 --> 00:19:34.799
 But we know the Bible says

00:19:34.799 --> 00:19:38.459
 a great fish took up Jonah

00:19:38.459 --> 00:19:39.659
 when they threw him overboard.

00:19:41.059 --> 00:19:42.740
 Now let me ask you a question.

00:19:42.740 --> 00:19:44.960
 What was God's purpose in that fish?

00:19:45.220 --> 00:19:47.819
 Was it punishment or was it rescuing him?

00:19:48.460 --> 00:19:49.640
 I want you to understand

00:19:49.640 --> 00:19:51.640
 when God disciplines his children,

00:19:52.279 --> 00:19:54.920
 the goal is always restoration,

00:19:55.259 --> 00:19:56.440
 not condemnation.

00:19:56.900 --> 00:19:59.380
 What was God doing with Jonah through that?

00:19:59.420 --> 00:20:02.579
 He wanted to get Jonah back on track.

00:20:03.259 --> 00:20:04.259
 Now I want you to understand

00:20:04.259 --> 00:20:06.180
 that sometimes correction's not comfortable.

00:20:06.779 --> 00:20:09.019
 If correction was comfortable,

00:20:09.359 --> 00:20:10.819
 would it have any effect upon you?

00:20:10.819 --> 00:20:13.779
 Think about it for a moment.

00:20:13.879 --> 00:20:14.839
 As human beings,

00:20:14.939 --> 00:20:16.740
 where do we react or change?

00:20:16.819 --> 00:20:18.779
 Do we react in comfort to change?

00:20:19.179 --> 00:20:20.879
 Do we change when things are comfortable?

00:20:23.359 --> 00:20:24.559
 No, we don't, do we?

00:20:25.439 --> 00:20:27.799
 We're perfectly content to stay comfortable.

00:20:28.220 --> 00:20:29.859
 But when things are uncomfortable

00:20:29.859 --> 00:20:32.939
 is when we start contemplating,

00:20:33.099 --> 00:20:34.980
 considering when change needs to happen.

00:20:34.980 --> 00:20:38.519
 And we see that God does that.

00:20:39.019 --> 00:20:40.019
 So when you think about

00:20:40.019 --> 00:20:41.940
 when you discipline your child,

00:20:42.200 --> 00:20:43.279
 what's the goal?

00:20:43.440 --> 00:20:45.299
 Ask yourself before you act,

00:20:45.559 --> 00:20:48.059
 am I responding to my frustration

00:20:48.059 --> 00:20:51.279
 or am I responding to my child's need?

00:20:51.839 --> 00:20:53.259
 You know, I'll be honest with you this morning.

00:20:53.319 --> 00:20:54.640
 As a dad, there were some times

00:20:54.640 --> 00:20:55.779
 that it was out of frustration

00:20:55.779 --> 00:20:56.819
 instead of my children.

00:20:58.299 --> 00:20:59.099
 You know why?

00:20:59.200 --> 00:21:00.180
 As a dad sometimes,

00:21:00.180 --> 00:21:01.000
 I want you to understand

00:21:01.000 --> 00:21:02.980
 as an earthly dad,

00:21:05.060 --> 00:21:07.340
 sometimes we don't do what we ought to do.

00:21:07.900 --> 00:21:10.160
 The important thing is you recognize that

00:21:10.160 --> 00:21:14.320
 and you take correction.

00:21:15.000 --> 00:21:16.880
 Because we're going to look here a little bit

00:21:16.880 --> 00:21:18.620
 that God even points that out

00:21:18.620 --> 00:21:19.900
 a little later here

00:21:19.900 --> 00:21:20.960
 as we read earlier

00:21:20.960 --> 00:21:24.259
 about a earthly father who corrects us

00:21:24.259 --> 00:21:26.440
 because sometimes an earthly father corrects

00:21:26.440 --> 00:21:27.799
 because of what they want

00:21:27.799 --> 00:21:30.039
 instead of what's best for the child

00:21:30.039 --> 00:21:31.820
 and understanding those things.

00:21:32.400 --> 00:21:34.279
 You know, I want to encourage you this morning

00:21:34.279 --> 00:21:37.100
 because discipline rooted in love

00:21:37.100 --> 00:21:39.100
 can sometimes wait a minute

00:21:39.100 --> 00:21:42.340
 to make sure it's love that's speaking.

00:21:42.940 --> 00:21:43.600
 You know, as a parent,

00:21:43.700 --> 00:21:44.960
 I encourage you to slow down

00:21:44.960 --> 00:21:46.299
 and ask yourself that question.

00:21:46.380 --> 00:21:47.960
 When your child needs correction,

00:21:48.820 --> 00:21:52.539
 what, why, and how am I doing this?

00:21:52.539 --> 00:21:57.000
 Is it being done from my frustration

00:21:57.000 --> 00:22:01.279
 or because I want to direct them

00:22:01.279 --> 00:22:04.839
 in a direction that's going to benefit their future?

00:22:05.379 --> 00:22:07.119
 Do you think it would change a generation

00:22:07.119 --> 00:22:08.740
 if all the parents followed that?

00:22:10.759 --> 00:22:13.339
 It would change an entire generation.

00:22:14.500 --> 00:22:16.319
 But we see here, number two,

00:22:16.659 --> 00:22:17.539
 here this morning,

00:22:17.619 --> 00:22:18.799
 look down at verse 11

00:22:18.799 --> 00:22:20.519
 and he tells us this.

00:22:20.519 --> 00:22:20.920
 He says,

00:22:20.920 --> 00:22:22.720
 Now no chastening for the present

00:22:22.720 --> 00:22:24.480
 seemeth to be joyous, but grievous.

00:22:25.300 --> 00:22:26.480
 Nevertheless, afterwards,

00:22:26.620 --> 00:22:28.860
 it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness

00:22:28.860 --> 00:22:32.120
 unto them that are exercised thereby.

00:22:32.920 --> 00:22:36.720
 You know, here's an honest verse for sure.

00:22:36.860 --> 00:22:38.539
 There's no question about it

00:22:38.539 --> 00:22:39.960
 when God tells us this,

00:22:40.380 --> 00:22:41.920
 that chastening correction

00:22:41.920 --> 00:22:44.580
 is not joyous, but grievous.

00:22:48.259 --> 00:22:50.580
 Correction always involves

00:22:50.579 --> 00:22:52.519
 something that's going to make you uncomfortable.

00:22:53.519 --> 00:22:55.379
 It may even include pain.

00:22:57.319 --> 00:22:58.220
 Because you know what?

00:22:58.279 --> 00:22:59.899
 Those are the things that get our attention.

00:23:01.859 --> 00:23:03.339
 But notice what it says.

00:23:03.419 --> 00:23:05.199
 It may hurt in the moment,

00:23:05.319 --> 00:23:06.119
 but afterwards,

00:23:06.319 --> 00:23:08.659
 it bears the peaceable fruit of what?

00:23:10.240 --> 00:23:10.679
 Righteousness.

00:23:10.740 --> 00:23:11.619
 That's the goal.

00:23:12.139 --> 00:23:14.379
 When we understand the purpose of discipline

00:23:14.380 --> 00:23:16.800
 is not only immediate compliance,

00:23:17.080 --> 00:23:18.780
 but long-term character.

00:23:19.720 --> 00:23:19.980
 You know,

00:23:20.080 --> 00:23:22.180
 we want to look for things long-term.

00:23:22.180 --> 00:23:22.840
 You know,

00:23:22.940 --> 00:23:24.460
 when we know and understand

00:23:24.460 --> 00:23:26.040
 that it's not just about,

00:23:26.420 --> 00:23:27.940
 we want to build in our children

00:23:27.940 --> 00:23:28.960
 self-control

00:23:28.960 --> 00:23:30.220
 and accountability

00:23:30.220 --> 00:23:33.560
 and the ability to live under authority.

00:23:33.940 --> 00:23:34.340
 You know,

00:23:34.380 --> 00:23:35.460
 we live in a generation

00:23:35.460 --> 00:23:37.700
 that has been told something

00:23:37.700 --> 00:23:41.340
 that's very destructive.

00:23:41.339 --> 00:23:43.939
 When a child gets told

00:23:43.939 --> 00:23:45.480
 the authority is themselves

00:23:45.480 --> 00:23:47.559
 and then you match it

00:23:47.559 --> 00:23:48.740
 with another philosophy,

00:23:49.559 --> 00:23:51.259
 follow your heart.

00:23:51.720 --> 00:23:51.959
 You know,

00:23:52.000 --> 00:23:53.019
 those two things sound like

00:23:53.019 --> 00:23:53.879
 they work out well.

00:23:54.199 --> 00:23:55.039
 Not by a chance,

00:23:55.099 --> 00:23:55.379
 do they?

00:23:56.079 --> 00:23:57.619
 Instead of what sounds like

00:23:57.619 --> 00:23:58.599
 for their benefit

00:23:58.599 --> 00:24:00.199
 becomes their destruction.

00:24:01.699 --> 00:24:03.119
 Because what are they following?

00:24:03.240 --> 00:24:04.339
 They're following something

00:24:04.339 --> 00:24:05.199
 that's counter

00:24:05.199 --> 00:24:09.000
 to what's going to benefit them.

00:24:09.000 --> 00:24:11.099
 to live under authority.

00:24:11.299 --> 00:24:11.480
 You know,

00:24:11.539 --> 00:24:12.579
 we need to understand

00:24:12.579 --> 00:24:15.799
 the dynamic of authority

00:24:15.799 --> 00:24:16.859
 and maybe we'll have to talk

00:24:16.859 --> 00:24:17.599
 about this a little later

00:24:17.599 --> 00:24:18.259
 because I don't have time

00:24:18.259 --> 00:24:19.299
 to get into it this morning.

00:24:20.740 --> 00:24:21.920
 But for your children

00:24:21.920 --> 00:24:23.039
 to understand

00:24:23.039 --> 00:24:24.420
 how authority works

00:24:24.420 --> 00:24:26.160
 and what's appropriate authority

00:24:26.160 --> 00:24:28.920
 is important.

00:24:28.980 --> 00:24:29.559
 Because you know what

00:24:29.559 --> 00:24:30.640
 the opposite of living

00:24:30.640 --> 00:24:31.660
 under authority is?

00:24:33.859 --> 00:24:34.259
 Rebellion.

00:24:34.819 --> 00:24:35.059
 You know,

00:24:35.099 --> 00:24:36.359
 I've yet to see a parent

00:24:36.359 --> 00:24:36.839
 that says,

00:24:37.000 --> 00:24:38.099
 I want to raise my kids

00:24:38.099 --> 00:24:39.000
 to be rebellious.

00:24:39.619 --> 00:24:40.279
 But oftentimes,

00:24:40.539 --> 00:24:41.980
 the very choices they make,

00:24:42.919 --> 00:24:43.819
 that's what they're promoting.

00:24:45.500 --> 00:24:46.599
 And then they're upset

00:24:46.599 --> 00:24:48.019
 that they got rebellious children.

00:24:48.779 --> 00:24:49.759
 It wasn't that

00:24:49.759 --> 00:24:52.319
 your child in itself was bad.

00:24:52.399 --> 00:24:53.179
 Sometimes it has to do

00:24:53.179 --> 00:24:53.839
 with the parenting.

00:24:54.959 --> 00:24:56.379
 Because as you understand

00:24:56.379 --> 00:24:56.939
 this morning,

00:24:56.939 --> 00:24:58.639
 we talked last week

00:24:58.639 --> 00:24:59.299
 a little bit about

00:24:59.299 --> 00:25:00.259
 gentle parenting.

00:25:02.559 --> 00:25:03.419
 And how sometimes

00:25:03.419 --> 00:25:04.639
 even the dynamic

00:25:04.639 --> 00:25:05.500
 of this pendulum

00:25:05.500 --> 00:25:07.059
 that we see in society,

00:25:07.059 --> 00:25:08.679
 society never seems

00:25:08.679 --> 00:25:10.139
 to land on the right direction.

00:25:12.019 --> 00:25:12.579
 You know,

00:25:12.619 --> 00:25:13.019
 we saw,

00:25:13.139 --> 00:25:14.039
 we talked last week

00:25:14.039 --> 00:25:14.799
 about where we had

00:25:14.799 --> 00:25:16.099
 a very dynamic

00:25:16.099 --> 00:25:17.039
 where people almost

00:25:17.039 --> 00:25:18.279
 promoted abuse

00:25:18.279 --> 00:25:20.039
 to a pendulum swing

00:25:20.039 --> 00:25:20.740
 the other way

00:25:20.740 --> 00:25:20.919
 where,

00:25:21.220 --> 00:25:22.220
 just talk to Johnny,

00:25:22.299 --> 00:25:23.099
 it'll be fine.

00:25:23.659 --> 00:25:24.700
 I want you to understand

00:25:24.700 --> 00:25:25.599
 both of those

00:25:25.599 --> 00:25:27.379
 are counter to what God wants.

00:25:28.059 --> 00:25:28.740
 God doesn't,

00:25:28.859 --> 00:25:29.460
 God's word

00:25:29.460 --> 00:25:30.779
 doesn't swing a pendulum,

00:25:31.019 --> 00:25:31.460
 it gives you

00:25:31.460 --> 00:25:32.480
 the pointed truth.

00:25:32.480 --> 00:25:34.640
 it gives you

00:25:34.640 --> 00:25:36.039
 a direction to go.

00:25:36.519 --> 00:25:37.559
 And we understand

00:25:37.559 --> 00:25:39.019
 that this gentle

00:25:39.019 --> 00:25:40.220
 parenting mindset

00:25:40.220 --> 00:25:41.480
 prizes warmth

00:25:41.480 --> 00:25:42.279
 and connection

00:25:42.279 --> 00:25:43.920
 and even wants

00:25:43.920 --> 00:25:45.099
 what scripture wants

00:25:45.099 --> 00:25:45.519
 in a way

00:25:45.519 --> 00:25:46.319
 because it wants

00:25:46.319 --> 00:25:47.319
 to form

00:25:47.319 --> 00:25:49.819
 a formed heart

00:25:49.819 --> 00:25:50.480
 in your child

00:25:50.480 --> 00:25:51.140
 not merely

00:25:51.140 --> 00:25:52.599
 out of outward compliance,

00:25:53.059 --> 00:25:54.059
 but we understand

00:25:54.059 --> 00:25:56.299
 there is where

00:25:56.299 --> 00:25:57.400
 we part ways

00:25:57.400 --> 00:25:58.240
 is over the kind

00:25:58.240 --> 00:25:58.880
 of correction

00:25:58.880 --> 00:25:59.900
 it calls for.

00:25:59.900 --> 00:26:00.820
 You know,

00:26:00.860 --> 00:26:01.600
 we want to have

00:26:01.600 --> 00:26:02.259
 a connection

00:26:02.259 --> 00:26:03.080
 with our kids

00:26:03.080 --> 00:26:03.800
 we need to know

00:26:03.800 --> 00:26:04.920
 that they need to know

00:26:04.920 --> 00:26:05.980
 that you love them.

00:26:07.600 --> 00:26:09.560
 But passive correction

00:26:09.560 --> 00:26:11.759
 will not get them

00:26:11.759 --> 00:26:12.440
 the direction

00:26:12.440 --> 00:26:13.400
 and understanding

00:26:13.400 --> 00:26:14.240
 of security

00:26:14.240 --> 00:26:15.720
 and love

00:26:15.720 --> 00:26:16.600
 that they need.

00:26:17.259 --> 00:26:18.400
 Direct correction

00:26:18.400 --> 00:26:19.400
 is what's needed.

00:26:20.220 --> 00:26:21.120
 Sometimes you need

00:26:21.120 --> 00:26:22.380
 to address the point

00:26:22.380 --> 00:26:23.380
 pointedly.

00:26:24.000 --> 00:26:24.700
 Don't beat around

00:26:24.700 --> 00:26:25.220
 the bush.

00:26:25.800 --> 00:26:25.960
 You know,

00:26:26.019 --> 00:26:26.700
 sometimes we even

00:26:26.700 --> 00:26:27.800
 do that with adults

00:26:27.800 --> 00:26:28.360
 and sometimes

00:26:28.360 --> 00:26:29.640
 it gets us

00:26:29.640 --> 00:26:30.080
 in trouble

00:26:30.080 --> 00:26:30.759
 because we don't

00:26:30.759 --> 00:26:31.320
 want to actually

00:26:31.320 --> 00:26:32.140
 just call it out.

00:26:32.240 --> 00:26:32.380
 You know,

00:26:32.420 --> 00:26:32.920
 we want to have

00:26:32.920 --> 00:26:33.480
 all sorts of

00:26:33.480 --> 00:26:35.360
 sort of euthanisms

00:26:35.360 --> 00:26:36.420
 and everything else

00:26:36.420 --> 00:26:37.120
 that we have

00:26:37.120 --> 00:26:38.200
 to try to say

00:26:38.200 --> 00:26:39.720
 this is this

00:26:39.720 --> 00:26:40.640
 or that's that

00:26:40.640 --> 00:26:41.040
 and they're just

00:26:41.040 --> 00:26:41.700
 saying this is

00:26:41.700 --> 00:26:42.520
 what it is.

00:26:44.520 --> 00:26:45.020
 You know,

00:26:45.040 --> 00:26:45.740
 there's an account

00:26:45.740 --> 00:26:46.759
 in the Old Testament

00:26:46.759 --> 00:26:48.340
 with King David

00:26:48.340 --> 00:26:48.960
 and a man

00:26:48.960 --> 00:26:49.640
 by the name

00:26:49.640 --> 00:26:50.160
 of Nathan.

00:26:50.720 --> 00:26:51.320
 That account

00:26:51.320 --> 00:26:51.820
 can give us

00:26:51.820 --> 00:26:52.700
 a good dynamic

00:26:52.700 --> 00:26:55.060
 because I want you

00:26:55.060 --> 00:26:55.720
 to see what

00:26:55.720 --> 00:26:56.660
 Nathan did.

00:26:57.020 --> 00:26:57.880
 If you remember

00:26:57.880 --> 00:26:58.540
 that story,

00:26:58.680 --> 00:26:59.660
 Nathan came

00:26:59.660 --> 00:27:00.780
 and told David

00:27:00.780 --> 00:27:03.160
 about an account

00:27:03.160 --> 00:27:04.040
 of an individual

00:27:04.040 --> 00:27:04.880
 who was taking

00:27:04.880 --> 00:27:06.500
 abuse of somebody

00:27:06.500 --> 00:27:07.480
 who didn't have

00:27:07.480 --> 00:27:08.720
 as much as them

00:27:08.720 --> 00:27:10.800
 and he goes

00:27:10.800 --> 00:27:11.280
 through this

00:27:11.280 --> 00:27:12.480
 whole spill

00:27:12.480 --> 00:27:13.380
 about how

00:27:13.380 --> 00:27:14.200
 all these things

00:27:14.200 --> 00:27:14.940
 come together

00:27:14.940 --> 00:27:16.220
 because what he did

00:27:16.220 --> 00:27:17.380
 is he played it out

00:27:17.380 --> 00:27:18.120
 to the fact

00:27:18.120 --> 00:27:19.120
 that David

00:27:19.120 --> 00:27:20.040
 would understand

00:27:20.040 --> 00:27:20.560
 because David

00:27:20.560 --> 00:27:21.360
 got upset.

00:27:21.740 --> 00:27:21.860
 You know,

00:27:21.880 --> 00:27:22.140
 he says,

00:27:22.220 --> 00:27:23.000
 where's this guy?

00:27:23.100 --> 00:27:23.840
 This needs to be

00:27:23.840 --> 00:27:24.360
 corrected.

00:27:25.140 --> 00:27:25.640
 But that's where

00:27:25.640 --> 00:27:26.360
 it gets direct

00:27:26.359 --> 00:27:26.919
 because what

00:27:26.919 --> 00:27:27.779
 did Nathan do?

00:27:28.259 --> 00:27:29.159
 Thou art the man.

00:27:29.699 --> 00:27:30.359
 That's direct

00:27:30.359 --> 00:27:30.979
 correction

00:27:30.979 --> 00:27:32.699
 to say,

00:27:32.799 --> 00:27:32.959
 hey,

00:27:33.199 --> 00:27:34.439
 it's you

00:27:34.439 --> 00:27:36.699
 and you need

00:27:36.699 --> 00:27:37.479
 to deal with it.

00:27:38.019 --> 00:27:38.259
 You know,

00:27:38.439 --> 00:27:39.439
 you can't pass

00:27:39.439 --> 00:27:40.000
 the buck.

00:27:40.219 --> 00:27:41.039
 It's not somebody

00:27:41.039 --> 00:27:41.959
 else's fault.

00:27:43.819 --> 00:27:44.779
 The motive

00:27:44.779 --> 00:27:46.039
 behind a gentler

00:27:46.039 --> 00:27:46.619
 correction

00:27:46.619 --> 00:27:47.379
 is empathy.

00:27:48.039 --> 00:27:48.479
 They want,

00:27:48.659 --> 00:27:49.719
 you want to feel

00:27:49.719 --> 00:27:50.879
 what your child

00:27:50.879 --> 00:27:51.339
 feels

00:27:51.339 --> 00:27:52.219
 and spare them

00:27:52.219 --> 00:27:52.759
 the hurt.

00:27:53.000 --> 00:27:53.819
 But I want you

00:27:53.819 --> 00:27:54.939
 to understand this.

00:27:54.940 --> 00:27:55.920
 Empathy cannot

00:27:55.920 --> 00:27:57.240
 do the hard

00:27:57.240 --> 00:27:57.740
 thing

00:27:57.740 --> 00:27:59.240
 and it's not

00:27:59.240 --> 00:27:59.940
 compassion.

00:28:00.059 --> 00:28:00.600
 There's a difference

00:28:00.600 --> 00:28:01.440
 between compassion

00:28:01.440 --> 00:28:02.100
 and empathy.

00:28:03.100 --> 00:28:03.620
 Compassion

00:28:03.620 --> 00:28:04.140
 is built

00:28:04.140 --> 00:28:04.980
 out of love

00:28:04.980 --> 00:28:05.759
 doing what's

00:28:05.759 --> 00:28:06.620
 needful

00:28:06.620 --> 00:28:07.640
 and not just

00:28:07.640 --> 00:28:08.220
 what feels

00:28:08.220 --> 00:28:08.640
 good.

00:28:10.519 --> 00:28:11.700
 We need people

00:28:11.700 --> 00:28:12.580
 of compassion

00:28:12.580 --> 00:28:13.420
 not of empathy.

00:28:15.240 --> 00:28:15.960
 I've talked

00:28:15.960 --> 00:28:16.420
 about that

00:28:16.420 --> 00:28:16.799
 before.

00:28:16.900 --> 00:28:17.320
 We live in a

00:28:17.320 --> 00:28:18.080
 generation that

00:28:18.080 --> 00:28:18.960
 lives by empathy.

00:28:19.100 --> 00:28:19.820
 Empathy is not

00:28:19.820 --> 00:28:20.420
 a good word.

00:28:21.180 --> 00:28:22.279
 It sounds good

00:28:22.279 --> 00:28:22.900
 but it really

00:28:22.900 --> 00:28:23.500
 isn't doing

00:28:23.500 --> 00:28:24.100
 what it says

00:28:24.100 --> 00:28:24.620
 it does.

00:28:24.940 --> 00:28:28.100
 Compassion

00:28:28.100 --> 00:28:31.920
 means I have

00:28:31.920 --> 00:28:32.640
 a loving

00:28:32.640 --> 00:28:33.840
 care for the

00:28:33.840 --> 00:28:34.259
 outcome

00:28:34.259 --> 00:28:35.320
 and I will

00:28:35.320 --> 00:28:36.160
 do what's

00:28:36.160 --> 00:28:36.620
 needed

00:28:36.620 --> 00:28:37.539
 to help

00:28:37.539 --> 00:28:37.960
 them

00:28:37.960 --> 00:28:38.600
 that they

00:28:38.600 --> 00:28:39.140
 might get

00:28:39.140 --> 00:28:39.759
 accomplished

00:28:39.759 --> 00:28:40.220
 and go

00:28:40.220 --> 00:28:40.440
 to the

00:28:40.440 --> 00:28:40.920
 direction

00:28:40.920 --> 00:28:41.299
 that they

00:28:41.299 --> 00:28:41.660
 need to

00:28:41.660 --> 00:28:41.980
 go.

00:28:43.620 --> 00:28:44.220
 Compassion

00:28:44.220 --> 00:28:44.700
 says I

00:28:44.700 --> 00:28:45.140
 want a

00:28:45.140 --> 00:28:45.720
 solution

00:28:45.720 --> 00:28:46.140
 to the

00:28:46.140 --> 00:28:46.539
 problem

00:28:46.539 --> 00:28:47.279
 and not

00:28:47.279 --> 00:28:47.680
 wather

00:28:47.680 --> 00:28:48.340
 with them

00:28:48.340 --> 00:28:48.740
 in the

00:28:48.740 --> 00:28:49.180
 problem.

00:28:50.779 --> 00:28:51.360
 Empathy

00:28:51.360 --> 00:28:52.039
 says let's

00:28:52.039 --> 00:28:52.980
 wather together

00:28:52.980 --> 00:28:53.720
 in the mud.

00:28:53.720 --> 00:28:55.420
 compassion

00:28:55.420 --> 00:28:56.059
 says let me

00:28:56.059 --> 00:28:56.400
 help you

00:28:56.400 --> 00:28:56.819
 out of the

00:28:56.819 --> 00:28:57.160
 mud and

00:28:57.160 --> 00:28:57.579
 clean you

00:28:57.579 --> 00:28:57.920
 up.

00:28:58.620 --> 00:28:59.120
 I'm glad

00:28:59.120 --> 00:28:59.799
 God has

00:28:59.799 --> 00:29:00.480
 compassion.

00:29:02.360 --> 00:29:03.019
 I'm glad

00:29:03.019 --> 00:29:03.660
 God doesn't

00:29:03.660 --> 00:29:04.259
 have empathy.

00:29:04.980 --> 00:29:05.360
 He doesn't

00:29:05.360 --> 00:29:05.660
 want to

00:29:05.660 --> 00:29:05.880
 come

00:29:05.880 --> 00:29:06.579
 wather in

00:29:06.579 --> 00:29:06.980
 the mud

00:29:06.980 --> 00:29:07.559
 with us.

00:29:07.880 --> 00:29:08.240
 He doesn't

00:29:08.240 --> 00:29:08.740
 want to

00:29:08.740 --> 00:29:08.920
 come

00:29:08.920 --> 00:29:09.700
 wather in

00:29:09.700 --> 00:29:10.059
 sin.

00:29:10.380 --> 00:29:10.819
 He says

00:29:10.819 --> 00:29:11.180
 I want

00:29:11.180 --> 00:29:11.579
 to lift

00:29:11.579 --> 00:29:12.019
 you up

00:29:12.019 --> 00:29:12.539
 out of

00:29:12.539 --> 00:29:12.980
 that.

00:29:12.980 --> 00:29:13.039
 that.

00:29:15.319 --> 00:29:15.900
 That's

00:29:15.900 --> 00:29:16.319
 the same

00:29:16.319 --> 00:29:17.019
 dynamic

00:29:17.019 --> 00:29:18.000
 because

00:29:18.000 --> 00:29:19.180
 compassion

00:29:19.180 --> 00:29:19.740
 cares

00:29:19.740 --> 00:29:20.279
 enough to

00:29:20.279 --> 00:29:20.740
 do what

00:29:20.740 --> 00:29:21.299
 is right

00:29:21.299 --> 00:29:22.099
 even when

00:29:22.099 --> 00:29:22.940
 it grieves

00:29:22.940 --> 00:29:23.700
 the individual

00:29:23.700 --> 00:29:24.539
 empathy.

00:29:24.700 --> 00:29:24.980
 The other

00:29:24.980 --> 00:29:25.460
 problem you

00:29:25.460 --> 00:29:25.980
 have with

00:29:25.980 --> 00:29:26.460
 that in

00:29:26.460 --> 00:29:26.900
 today's

00:29:26.900 --> 00:29:27.259
 world

00:29:27.259 --> 00:29:29.079
 is that

00:29:29.079 --> 00:29:29.720
 the child

00:29:29.720 --> 00:29:30.440
 will never

00:29:30.440 --> 00:29:32.140
 learn that

00:29:32.140 --> 00:29:33.099
 actions have

00:29:33.099 --> 00:29:33.980
 consequences,

00:29:34.519 --> 00:29:35.660
 that boundaries

00:29:35.660 --> 00:29:36.660
 are real,

00:29:37.000 --> 00:29:37.559
 and that

00:29:37.559 --> 00:29:38.579
 character is

00:29:38.579 --> 00:29:39.099
 built through

00:29:39.099 --> 00:29:40.779
 difficulty and

00:29:40.779 --> 00:29:41.519
 not around

00:29:41.519 --> 00:29:41.799
 it.

00:29:43.339 --> 00:29:44.160
 Notice what

00:29:44.160 --> 00:29:44.779
 it tells us

00:29:44.779 --> 00:29:45.200
 here in our

00:29:45.200 --> 00:29:45.500
 text.

00:29:45.579 --> 00:29:46.059
 Look back

00:29:46.059 --> 00:29:46.519
 in verse

00:29:46.519 --> 00:29:46.960
 11.

00:29:47.519 --> 00:29:48.019
 It says

00:29:48.019 --> 00:29:48.480
 this,

00:29:48.819 --> 00:29:49.400
 it says

00:29:49.400 --> 00:29:50.119
 nevertheless

00:29:50.119 --> 00:29:51.160
 afterwards

00:29:51.160 --> 00:29:52.220
 it yielded

00:29:52.220 --> 00:29:53.000
 the peaceable

00:29:53.000 --> 00:29:53.599
 fruit of

00:29:53.599 --> 00:29:53.920
 what?

00:29:55.379 --> 00:29:55.940
 Righteousness.

00:29:56.379 --> 00:29:56.920
 That which

00:29:56.920 --> 00:29:57.920
 is right.

00:29:59.319 --> 00:29:59.579
 You know

00:29:59.579 --> 00:30:00.220
 today we

00:30:00.220 --> 00:30:00.539
 have a lot

00:30:00.539 --> 00:30:01.000
 of parents

00:30:01.000 --> 00:30:01.339
 who want

00:30:01.339 --> 00:30:01.799
 to remove

00:30:01.799 --> 00:30:02.519
 consequences.

00:30:03.299 --> 00:30:03.440
 You know

00:30:03.440 --> 00:30:03.700
 what the

00:30:03.700 --> 00:30:04.319
 problem is

00:30:04.319 --> 00:30:04.700
 with our

00:30:04.700 --> 00:30:05.240
 kids and

00:30:05.240 --> 00:30:05.819
 our schools?

00:30:07.519 --> 00:30:08.160
 Is we

00:30:08.160 --> 00:30:08.519
 don't have

00:30:08.519 --> 00:30:09.160
 parents that

00:30:09.160 --> 00:30:09.539
 want to hold

00:30:09.539 --> 00:30:09.920
 their kids

00:30:09.920 --> 00:30:10.339
 accountable.

00:30:10.940 --> 00:30:11.259
 They don't

00:30:11.259 --> 00:30:11.799
 want to live

00:30:11.799 --> 00:30:12.039
 under

00:30:12.039 --> 00:30:12.559
 authority.

00:30:14.480 --> 00:30:15.440
 And understand

00:30:15.440 --> 00:30:16.299
 that person

00:30:16.299 --> 00:30:16.720
 is there,

00:30:16.799 --> 00:30:17.359
 that teacher

00:30:17.359 --> 00:30:18.440
 is there to

00:30:18.440 --> 00:30:19.119
 give them

00:30:19.119 --> 00:30:19.920
 something that

00:30:19.920 --> 00:30:20.980
 they need to

00:30:20.980 --> 00:30:21.740
 be prepared

00:30:21.740 --> 00:30:22.500
 for life.

00:30:23.079 --> 00:30:23.559
 When a kid

00:30:23.559 --> 00:30:24.079
 doesn't get

00:30:24.079 --> 00:30:25.220
 an A, it's

00:30:25.220 --> 00:30:25.839
 probably because

00:30:25.839 --> 00:30:26.259
 they didn't

00:30:26.259 --> 00:30:26.720
 earn it.

00:30:28.680 --> 00:30:29.460
 Let me give

00:30:29.460 --> 00:30:29.859
 you another

00:30:29.859 --> 00:30:30.119
 clue.

00:30:30.220 --> 00:30:30.700
 Even if they

00:30:30.700 --> 00:30:31.259
 earned it and

00:30:31.259 --> 00:30:31.640
 the teacher

00:30:31.640 --> 00:30:32.279
 didn't give

00:30:32.279 --> 00:30:33.039
 it, I want

00:30:33.039 --> 00:30:33.299
 you to

00:30:33.299 --> 00:30:34.099
 understand it's

00:30:34.099 --> 00:30:34.559
 going to build

00:30:34.559 --> 00:30:35.920
 character in

00:30:35.920 --> 00:30:36.420
 them because

00:30:36.420 --> 00:30:37.000
 you can do

00:30:37.000 --> 00:30:37.940
 everything right

00:30:37.940 --> 00:30:38.500
 and still not

00:30:38.500 --> 00:30:38.980
 get the right

00:30:38.980 --> 00:30:39.480
 outcome.

00:30:39.480 --> 00:30:41.620
 you're

00:30:41.620 --> 00:30:42.200
 teaching them

00:30:42.200 --> 00:30:42.860
 some lessons

00:30:42.860 --> 00:30:43.599
 in life.

00:30:46.079 --> 00:30:46.759
 That's the

00:30:46.759 --> 00:30:47.279
 goal of

00:30:47.279 --> 00:30:47.759
 parenting.

00:30:48.519 --> 00:30:49.019
 Parenting

00:30:49.019 --> 00:30:49.559
 isn't to

00:30:49.559 --> 00:30:50.099
 coddle,

00:30:50.559 --> 00:30:51.059
 it's to

00:30:51.059 --> 00:30:51.700
 correct and

00:30:51.700 --> 00:30:52.299
 to guide.

00:30:54.500 --> 00:30:55.059
 Disciplining

00:30:55.059 --> 00:30:55.720
 in love

00:30:55.720 --> 00:30:56.299
 says I

00:30:56.299 --> 00:30:56.839
 want to,

00:30:57.019 --> 00:30:57.559
 I'm looking

00:30:57.559 --> 00:30:58.460
 long term.

00:30:59.599 --> 00:30:59.880
 You know

00:30:59.880 --> 00:31:00.279
 what God

00:31:00.279 --> 00:31:00.740
 does in

00:31:00.740 --> 00:31:01.279
 your life

00:31:01.279 --> 00:31:01.579
 when he

00:31:01.579 --> 00:31:02.039
 corrects

00:31:02.039 --> 00:31:02.120
 you?

00:31:02.200 --> 00:31:02.360
 He's

00:31:02.360 --> 00:31:02.620
 looking

00:31:02.620 --> 00:31:03.279
 long term.

00:31:03.279 --> 00:31:05.980
 He's

00:31:05.980 --> 00:31:06.480
 looking in

00:31:06.480 --> 00:31:06.660
 your

00:31:06.660 --> 00:31:07.399
 spiritual,

00:31:07.940 --> 00:31:08.240
 mental,

00:31:08.500 --> 00:31:08.839
 physical

00:31:08.839 --> 00:31:09.619
 development

00:31:09.619 --> 00:31:10.899
 that you

00:31:10.899 --> 00:31:11.639
 might become

00:31:11.639 --> 00:31:13.359
 more like

00:31:13.359 --> 00:31:14.420
 him.

00:31:15.920 --> 00:31:16.500
 That's

00:31:16.500 --> 00:31:16.819
 called the

00:31:16.819 --> 00:31:17.500
 process of

00:31:17.500 --> 00:31:18.319
 sanctification.

00:31:19.139 --> 00:31:19.299
 You know

00:31:19.299 --> 00:31:20.359
 today as

00:31:20.359 --> 00:31:21.139
 parents are

00:31:21.139 --> 00:31:21.779
 you disciplined

00:31:21.779 --> 00:31:22.740
 towards character?

00:31:23.579 --> 00:31:24.500
 Thinking about

00:31:24.500 --> 00:31:24.960
 who your

00:31:24.960 --> 00:31:25.500
 child is

00:31:25.500 --> 00:31:26.059
 becoming?

00:31:26.059 --> 00:31:27.119
 Or only

00:31:27.119 --> 00:31:28.000
 compliance?

00:31:29.240 --> 00:31:30.160
 Because the

00:31:30.160 --> 00:31:31.339
 long view

00:31:31.339 --> 00:31:32.679
 changes the

00:31:32.679 --> 00:31:33.439
 method and

00:31:33.439 --> 00:31:34.139
 the tone.

00:31:34.619 --> 00:31:35.240
 Here's the

00:31:35.240 --> 00:31:36.019
 test in the

00:31:36.019 --> 00:31:37.079
 next hard

00:31:37.079 --> 00:31:37.519
 moment.

00:31:37.619 --> 00:31:37.959
 Did your

00:31:37.959 --> 00:31:38.759
 child pass

00:31:38.759 --> 00:31:39.139
 through a

00:31:39.139 --> 00:31:39.959
 real consequence

00:31:39.959 --> 00:31:41.039
 or did you

00:31:41.039 --> 00:31:41.679
 rescue him

00:31:41.679 --> 00:31:42.119
 from it?

00:31:42.859 --> 00:31:43.099
 Because

00:31:43.099 --> 00:31:43.720
 understand,

00:31:43.819 --> 00:31:44.339
 look back up

00:31:44.339 --> 00:31:45.220
 in verse 10

00:31:45.220 --> 00:31:46.399
 as we look

00:31:46.399 --> 00:31:46.819
 here in our

00:31:46.819 --> 00:31:47.299
 text in

00:31:47.299 --> 00:31:48.019
 Hebrews chapter

00:31:48.019 --> 00:31:48.539
 12.

00:31:48.980 --> 00:31:49.459
 Notice what

00:31:49.459 --> 00:31:49.799
 it says,

00:31:49.899 --> 00:31:50.740
 for verily for

00:31:50.740 --> 00:31:51.459
 a few days

00:31:51.459 --> 00:31:52.359
 chastening us

00:31:52.359 --> 00:31:53.599
 after their

00:31:53.599 --> 00:31:54.359
 own pleasure

00:31:54.359 --> 00:31:55.199
 but for our

00:31:55.199 --> 00:31:56.359
 profit that

00:31:56.359 --> 00:31:57.559
 we might be

00:31:57.559 --> 00:31:58.539
 partakers of

00:31:58.539 --> 00:31:59.899
 his holiness.

00:32:00.599 --> 00:32:00.919
 Let's

00:32:00.920 --> 00:32:01.519
 understand,

00:32:01.700 --> 00:32:02.120
 effective

00:32:02.120 --> 00:32:02.880
 discipline

00:32:02.880 --> 00:32:03.539
 requires

00:32:03.539 --> 00:32:04.480
 consistency

00:32:04.480 --> 00:32:06.160
 and grace.

00:32:06.759 --> 00:32:07.279
 Here this

00:32:07.279 --> 00:32:08.620
 verse contrasts

00:32:08.620 --> 00:32:09.519
 human discipline

00:32:09.519 --> 00:32:10.519
 which sometimes

00:32:10.519 --> 00:32:11.660
 is inconsistent

00:32:11.660 --> 00:32:12.660
 and self-serving.

00:32:13.120 --> 00:32:13.360
 You know

00:32:13.360 --> 00:32:14.140
 as a parent

00:32:14.140 --> 00:32:14.840
 sometimes you

00:32:14.840 --> 00:32:15.100
 can be

00:32:15.100 --> 00:32:15.660
 inconsistent.

00:32:18.240 --> 00:32:19.240
 Sometimes you'll

00:32:19.240 --> 00:32:20.240
 do things because

00:32:20.240 --> 00:32:21.080
 it's self-serving

00:32:21.080 --> 00:32:21.860
 it's what benefits

00:32:21.860 --> 00:32:23.220
 me but you

00:32:23.220 --> 00:32:23.580
 know the good

00:32:23.580 --> 00:32:24.220
 part is?

00:32:25.820 --> 00:32:26.840
 Is when God

00:32:26.840 --> 00:32:27.660
 disciplines you

00:32:27.660 --> 00:32:28.440
 it's not about

00:32:28.440 --> 00:32:29.820
 him, it's about

00:32:29.820 --> 00:32:30.140
 you.

00:32:30.140 --> 00:32:31.020
 Why?

00:32:31.200 --> 00:32:32.820
 Because nobody

00:32:32.820 --> 00:32:33.640
 loves you

00:32:33.640 --> 00:32:35.280
 like God

00:32:35.280 --> 00:32:35.759
 loves you.

00:32:36.100 --> 00:32:36.840
 We need to

00:32:36.840 --> 00:32:37.820
 understand the

00:32:37.820 --> 00:32:38.259
 picture.

00:32:39.000 --> 00:32:40.040
 God's discipline

00:32:40.040 --> 00:32:40.740
 is always

00:32:40.740 --> 00:32:41.840
 purposeful and

00:32:41.840 --> 00:32:43.060
 aimed for our

00:32:43.060 --> 00:32:44.480
 profit or benefit

00:32:44.480 --> 00:32:45.700
 making us

00:32:45.700 --> 00:32:46.800
 partakers of

00:32:46.800 --> 00:32:47.360
 his holiness.

00:32:49.160 --> 00:32:49.720
 You know as a

00:32:49.720 --> 00:32:50.720
 human father you

00:32:50.720 --> 00:32:51.980
 might discipline

00:32:51.980 --> 00:32:53.780
 imperfectly but

00:32:53.780 --> 00:32:54.220
 we need to

00:32:54.220 --> 00:32:55.240
 understand that

00:32:55.240 --> 00:32:56.140
 we still need to

00:32:56.140 --> 00:32:57.420
 discipline with

00:32:57.420 --> 00:32:57.880
 as much

00:32:57.880 --> 00:33:00.600
 intentionality and

00:33:00.600 --> 00:33:01.600
 consistency as

00:33:01.600 --> 00:33:02.600
 grace allows.

00:33:03.860 --> 00:33:04.320
 Because you

00:33:04.320 --> 00:33:04.600
 know what

00:33:04.600 --> 00:33:05.060
 happens?

00:33:05.200 --> 00:33:06.000
 Oftentimes this

00:33:06.000 --> 00:33:06.800
 is another

00:33:06.800 --> 00:33:08.000
 dynamic is you

00:33:08.000 --> 00:33:08.279
 have an

00:33:08.279 --> 00:33:09.300
 inconsistency in

00:33:09.300 --> 00:33:09.820
 the household.

00:33:10.400 --> 00:33:10.840
 You know pretty

00:33:10.840 --> 00:33:11.519
 much I would

00:33:11.519 --> 00:33:12.220
 say you could

00:33:12.220 --> 00:33:12.920
 talk to April

00:33:12.920 --> 00:33:13.500
 too but I

00:33:13.500 --> 00:33:14.360
 think April and

00:33:14.360 --> 00:33:14.920
 I did a pretty

00:33:14.920 --> 00:33:15.560
 good job at

00:33:15.560 --> 00:33:16.100
 this and that

00:33:16.100 --> 00:33:16.700
 was always being

00:33:16.700 --> 00:33:17.180
 on the same

00:33:17.180 --> 00:33:17.560
 page.

00:33:19.320 --> 00:33:19.680
 Because you know

00:33:19.680 --> 00:33:20.240
 what kids love

00:33:20.240 --> 00:33:20.460
 to do?

00:33:20.500 --> 00:33:20.740
 Have you ever

00:33:20.740 --> 00:33:21.200
 noticed this?

00:33:21.259 --> 00:33:21.519
 You don't even

00:33:21.519 --> 00:33:22.000
 have to teach

00:33:22.000 --> 00:33:22.120
 them?

00:33:22.119 --> 00:33:24.519
 Mom tells

00:33:24.519 --> 00:33:24.979
 them no.

00:33:25.059 --> 00:33:25.379
 Where do they

00:33:25.379 --> 00:33:25.919
 go next?

00:33:27.059 --> 00:33:27.759
 Sometimes grandma

00:33:27.759 --> 00:33:28.459
 needs a spanking.

00:33:28.919 --> 00:33:29.439
 They go to the

00:33:29.439 --> 00:33:29.979
 other parent.

00:33:30.039 --> 00:33:30.319
 What are they

00:33:30.319 --> 00:33:31.059
 looking for?

00:33:33.739 --> 00:33:34.219
 Inconsistencies.

00:33:34.839 --> 00:33:35.379
 That's the reason

00:33:35.379 --> 00:33:36.519
 as a parent you

00:33:36.519 --> 00:33:37.079
 need to be on

00:33:37.079 --> 00:33:37.959
 the same page.

00:33:38.519 --> 00:33:40.079
 Because inconsistency

00:33:40.079 --> 00:33:41.259
 causes a problem.

00:33:42.019 --> 00:33:43.000
 Permissive parenting

00:33:43.000 --> 00:33:44.299
 is nothing new but

00:33:44.299 --> 00:33:45.000
 it's become a

00:33:45.000 --> 00:33:46.879
 cultural default for

00:33:46.879 --> 00:33:47.679
 our generation.

00:33:47.839 --> 00:33:48.159
 You know what

00:33:48.159 --> 00:33:48.899
 happens when you're

00:33:48.899 --> 00:33:49.479
 inconsistent?

00:33:49.819 --> 00:33:50.699
 It's whatever the

00:33:50.699 --> 00:33:51.659
 moment calls for

00:33:51.660 --> 00:33:52.420
 will allow.

00:33:52.880 --> 00:33:53.480
 Instead of saying

00:33:53.480 --> 00:33:54.320
 no this is the

00:33:54.320 --> 00:33:54.860
 boundaries.

00:33:56.580 --> 00:33:58.160
 When we understand

00:33:58.160 --> 00:33:59.779
 that it's not the

00:33:59.779 --> 00:34:00.680
 path of least

00:34:00.680 --> 00:34:02.320
 resistance because

00:34:02.320 --> 00:34:03.200
 when you do that

00:34:03.200 --> 00:34:04.160
 you avoid hard

00:34:04.160 --> 00:34:05.000
 conversations.

00:34:05.560 --> 00:34:06.460
 You soften the

00:34:06.460 --> 00:34:07.759
 consequence and

00:34:07.759 --> 00:34:08.900
 you prize your

00:34:08.900 --> 00:34:09.920
 child's happiness

00:34:09.920 --> 00:34:11.539
 today over what

00:34:11.539 --> 00:34:12.039
 they ought to

00:34:12.039 --> 00:34:12.559
 become.

00:34:13.079 --> 00:34:13.500
 You know take a

00:34:13.500 --> 00:34:14.039
 look over into

00:34:14.039 --> 00:34:14.780
 Proverbs chapter

00:34:14.780 --> 00:34:15.440
 29.

00:34:16.400 --> 00:34:17.880
 Proverbs 29

00:34:17.880 --> 00:34:19.079
 and verse 15.

00:34:19.079 --> 00:34:22.119
 Notice what it

00:34:22.119 --> 00:34:22.719
 tells us here.

00:34:22.840 --> 00:34:23.440
 The rod and

00:34:23.440 --> 00:34:24.259
 reproof give

00:34:24.259 --> 00:34:25.759
 wisdom but a

00:34:25.759 --> 00:34:26.659
 child left to

00:34:26.659 --> 00:34:27.659
 himself bringeth

00:34:27.659 --> 00:34:28.500
 his mother to

00:34:28.500 --> 00:34:28.920
 shame.

00:34:31.239 --> 00:34:32.039
 Boy there's a lot

00:34:32.039 --> 00:34:32.719
 of truth to that.

00:34:33.420 --> 00:34:33.900
 You know what it's

00:34:33.900 --> 00:34:34.259
 telling me?

00:34:34.299 --> 00:34:34.659
 There was an

00:34:34.659 --> 00:34:35.579
 inconsistency.

00:34:36.239 --> 00:34:36.980
 You know consistent

00:34:36.980 --> 00:34:38.619
 discipline asks of

00:34:38.619 --> 00:34:39.639
 you something that

00:34:39.639 --> 00:34:41.579
 our culture doesn't

00:34:41.579 --> 00:34:42.259
 value.

00:34:43.059 --> 00:34:44.259
 The willingness to

00:34:44.259 --> 00:34:45.500
 be a parent not a

00:34:45.500 --> 00:34:45.799
 friend.

00:34:46.420 --> 00:34:46.900
 You know I want

00:34:46.900 --> 00:34:47.780
 you to understand

00:34:47.780 --> 00:34:48.660
 your job as a

00:34:48.660 --> 00:34:49.519
 parent is not to

00:34:49.519 --> 00:34:50.220
 be your kid's

00:34:50.220 --> 00:34:50.500
 friend.

00:34:51.079 --> 00:34:52.079
 There's a lot of

00:34:52.079 --> 00:34:52.539
 messed up

00:34:52.539 --> 00:34:53.800
 relationships because

00:34:53.800 --> 00:34:55.079
 people want their

00:34:55.079 --> 00:34:55.860
 kids to be their

00:34:55.860 --> 00:34:56.740
 friends instead of

00:34:56.740 --> 00:34:57.240
 you being their

00:34:57.240 --> 00:34:57.579
 parent.

00:34:59.740 --> 00:35:00.599
 I want you to

00:35:00.599 --> 00:35:01.300
 understand a

00:35:01.300 --> 00:35:02.119
 parent-child

00:35:02.119 --> 00:35:04.000
 relationship is a

00:35:04.000 --> 00:35:05.280
 distinct relationship

00:35:05.280 --> 00:35:06.079
 from a friendship

00:35:06.079 --> 00:35:08.200
 because you are not

00:35:08.200 --> 00:35:08.700
 peers.

00:35:09.380 --> 00:35:10.460
 There's a distinct

00:35:10.460 --> 00:35:12.180
 established relationship

00:35:12.180 --> 00:35:12.900
 that's there.

00:35:14.200 --> 00:35:14.840
 Now I want you to

00:35:14.840 --> 00:35:15.539
 understand when your

00:35:15.539 --> 00:35:16.220
 kids get to be

00:35:16.219 --> 00:35:17.119
 adults you'll have to

00:35:17.119 --> 00:35:17.879
 enjoy time together.

00:35:17.939 --> 00:35:18.579
 I'm not saying you

00:35:18.579 --> 00:35:19.419
 can't do that but

00:35:19.419 --> 00:35:20.619
 there's always got to

00:35:20.619 --> 00:35:21.619
 understand there is a

00:35:21.619 --> 00:35:23.319
 distinct dynamic that

00:35:23.319 --> 00:35:23.939
 takes place.

00:35:24.439 --> 00:35:25.939
 Your mom or dad is not

00:35:25.939 --> 00:35:26.459
 your buddy.

00:35:29.039 --> 00:35:29.859
 I want you to

00:35:29.859 --> 00:35:30.980
 understand if mom or

00:35:30.980 --> 00:35:31.879
 dad is their buddy you

00:35:31.879 --> 00:35:32.279
 know what they do?

00:35:32.299 --> 00:35:33.139
 They look at God like

00:35:33.139 --> 00:35:33.559
 their buddy.

00:35:37.819 --> 00:35:39.199
 God is not your buddy.

00:35:39.199 --> 00:35:40.659
 He's your loving

00:35:40.659 --> 00:35:44.339
 heavenly father who

00:35:44.340 --> 00:35:46.240
 came and died for

00:35:46.240 --> 00:35:46.960
 your sin.

00:35:47.480 --> 00:35:48.780
 He loved you enough to

00:35:48.780 --> 00:35:50.059
 step outside of his

00:35:50.059 --> 00:35:51.700
 comfort for your

00:35:51.700 --> 00:35:52.260
 benefit.

00:35:54.300 --> 00:35:55.760
 When we understand

00:35:55.760 --> 00:35:56.840
 that need of

00:35:56.840 --> 00:35:57.579
 consistency.

00:35:59.500 --> 00:36:00.680
 You know we talked

00:36:00.680 --> 00:36:01.559
 last week about

00:36:01.559 --> 00:36:01.900
 Eli.

00:36:04.300 --> 00:36:05.780
 The Bible tells us

00:36:05.780 --> 00:36:06.860
 that his sons made

00:36:06.860 --> 00:36:08.180
 themselves vile and he

00:36:08.180 --> 00:36:09.460
 restrained them not.

00:36:10.600 --> 00:36:11.440
 You know that's a

00:36:11.440 --> 00:36:12.800
 great picture of what

00:36:12.800 --> 00:36:13.960
 Eli did wrong.

00:36:14.060 --> 00:36:14.760
 It's not that he

00:36:14.760 --> 00:36:15.800
 didn't try to correct

00:36:15.800 --> 00:36:17.140
 them but he didn't

00:36:17.140 --> 00:36:18.380
 continue to guide them.

00:36:18.440 --> 00:36:19.160
 He didn't hold them

00:36:19.160 --> 00:36:19.900
 to account.

00:36:21.380 --> 00:36:23.460
 Because discipline is

00:36:23.460 --> 00:36:24.640
 more than setting the

00:36:24.640 --> 00:36:25.100
 standard.

00:36:25.260 --> 00:36:26.280
 It's enforcing the

00:36:26.280 --> 00:36:26.740
 standard.

00:36:29.019 --> 00:36:29.880
 Establishing those

00:36:29.880 --> 00:36:30.380
 things.

00:36:31.180 --> 00:36:31.880
 You know let me ask

00:36:31.880 --> 00:36:32.720
 the parents in here

00:36:32.720 --> 00:36:34.120
 this morning what are

00:36:34.120 --> 00:36:35.180
 two or three non

00:36:35.180 --> 00:36:36.840
 negotiable standards in

00:36:36.840 --> 00:36:37.320
 your home?

00:36:37.920 --> 00:36:38.440
 You know you think

00:36:38.440 --> 00:36:39.180
 about that for a

00:36:39.180 --> 00:36:39.400
 moment.

00:36:40.400 --> 00:36:41.620
 Do you have and do

00:36:41.619 --> 00:36:42.500
 your kids know?

00:36:42.880 --> 00:36:43.920
 Better yet if I went

00:36:43.920 --> 00:36:44.920
 downstairs and asked

00:36:44.920 --> 00:36:45.679
 your kids what are

00:36:45.679 --> 00:36:46.299
 some things your

00:36:46.299 --> 00:36:47.359
 parents absolutely

00:36:47.359 --> 00:36:47.960
 hold to?

00:36:50.440 --> 00:36:51.319
 Because if you have

00:36:51.319 --> 00:36:52.739
 non-negotiable standards

00:36:52.739 --> 00:36:54.940
 in your household your

00:36:54.940 --> 00:36:55.779
 kids will know them.

00:36:56.339 --> 00:36:56.960
 You know how I know

00:36:56.960 --> 00:36:57.859
 because that's what

00:36:57.859 --> 00:36:58.599
 they're listening to all

00:36:58.599 --> 00:36:58.960
 the time.

00:37:00.259 --> 00:37:01.099
 That's the direction.

00:37:01.259 --> 00:37:01.980
 That's the guidance.

00:37:02.539 --> 00:37:04.000
 When we understand are

00:37:04.000 --> 00:37:04.819
 they enforced

00:37:04.819 --> 00:37:05.659
 consistently?

00:37:07.719 --> 00:37:08.619
 You know one thing I

00:37:08.619 --> 00:37:09.639
 want to encourage you is

00:37:09.639 --> 00:37:10.879
 ask your spouse to hold

00:37:10.879 --> 00:37:13.440
 you accountable because

00:37:13.440 --> 00:37:15.059
 discipline works best

00:37:15.059 --> 00:37:17.179
 when both parents are

00:37:17.179 --> 00:37:17.639
 aligned.

00:37:18.199 --> 00:37:18.759
 There's a lot of

00:37:18.759 --> 00:37:20.039
 challenges in that today

00:37:20.039 --> 00:37:21.079
 with the type of family

00:37:21.079 --> 00:37:22.400
 dynamics that many kids

00:37:22.400 --> 00:37:23.139
 grow up in.

00:37:23.819 --> 00:37:24.319
 You know one of the

00:37:24.319 --> 00:37:26.359
 results we see in

00:37:26.359 --> 00:37:27.980
 society today is because

00:37:27.980 --> 00:37:28.639
 of divorce.

00:37:30.339 --> 00:37:31.879
 And the sad thing I see

00:37:31.879 --> 00:37:32.759
 with a lot of divorce

00:37:32.759 --> 00:37:35.819
 couples is they're not

00:37:35.819 --> 00:37:37.440
 even on the same page of

00:37:37.440 --> 00:37:38.379
 raising their children.

00:37:38.380 --> 00:37:40.960
 Well I get to do this

00:37:40.960 --> 00:37:42.180
 at dad's and mom doesn't

00:37:42.180 --> 00:37:43.220
 let me do this and mom

00:37:43.220 --> 00:37:44.660
 lets me do this and dad

00:37:44.660 --> 00:37:45.260
 doesn't do that.

00:37:45.320 --> 00:37:46.000
 You know what that does?

00:37:46.059 --> 00:37:47.099
 That destroys children.

00:37:47.720 --> 00:37:48.380
 That's the destructiveness.

00:37:49.680 --> 00:37:50.420
 You know even if two

00:37:50.420 --> 00:37:52.519
 parents can't see fit to

00:37:52.519 --> 00:37:53.660
 reconcile you know what

00:37:53.660 --> 00:37:54.579
 ought to unite them and

00:37:54.579 --> 00:37:55.059
 their children.

00:37:57.000 --> 00:37:58.700
 To say I want them to

00:37:58.700 --> 00:37:59.840
 have something better than

00:37:59.840 --> 00:38:00.559
 what I have.

00:38:01.700 --> 00:38:03.300
 I want to be consistent.

00:38:03.300 --> 00:38:06.980
 Not because I don't want

00:38:06.980 --> 00:38:08.160
 to get even with my

00:38:08.160 --> 00:38:09.740
 spouse or something else.

00:38:09.840 --> 00:38:10.820
 I want to be what's best

00:38:10.820 --> 00:38:11.560
 for my children.

00:38:12.019 --> 00:38:13.000
 That'd make a big change

00:38:13.000 --> 00:38:13.680
 in society.

00:38:14.240 --> 00:38:15.480
 When we understand the

00:38:15.480 --> 00:38:17.180
 picture of what God has

00:38:17.180 --> 00:38:17.940
 for us.

00:38:18.620 --> 00:38:20.080
 Because understand this

00:38:20.080 --> 00:38:21.360
 morning you know because

00:38:21.360 --> 00:38:23.140
 when it talks about God

00:38:23.140 --> 00:38:24.560
 being our heavenly father

00:38:24.560 --> 00:38:28.140
 God's not everybody's

00:38:28.140 --> 00:38:28.460
 father.

00:38:28.460 --> 00:38:33.079
 Jesus said to many you

00:38:33.079 --> 00:38:34.300
 of your father the devil.

00:38:34.420 --> 00:38:35.199
 Why did he say that?

00:38:35.260 --> 00:38:36.880
 Because we are born with

00:38:36.880 --> 00:38:38.340
 a sin nature that's

00:38:38.340 --> 00:38:39.559
 counter to the things of

00:38:39.559 --> 00:38:39.900
 God.

00:38:40.559 --> 00:38:42.059
 God becomes your heavenly

00:38:42.059 --> 00:38:43.199
 father the moment you

00:38:43.199 --> 00:38:44.820
 call upon Jesus Christ

00:38:44.820 --> 00:38:46.740
 the only begotten son of

00:38:46.740 --> 00:38:48.720
 God that died on the

00:38:48.720 --> 00:38:50.639
 cross of Calvary for you.

00:38:51.679 --> 00:38:53.500
 The Bible says Jesus when

00:38:53.500 --> 00:38:53.920
 he was talking to

00:38:53.920 --> 00:38:55.139
 Nicodemus used that term

00:38:55.139 --> 00:38:56.159
 you must be what?

00:38:56.880 --> 00:38:57.920
 Born again.

00:38:57.920 --> 00:38:59.019
 What's he talking about?

00:38:59.059 --> 00:39:00.400
 Being born into God's

00:39:00.400 --> 00:39:00.840
 family.

00:39:02.320 --> 00:39:04.139
 You're born into God's

00:39:04.139 --> 00:39:05.559
 family at the moment you

00:39:05.559 --> 00:39:06.820
 recognize you're a sinner

00:39:06.820 --> 00:39:08.460
 and need a savior and

00:39:08.460 --> 00:39:09.260
 call upon him.

00:39:09.659 --> 00:39:10.740
 You're now a member of

00:39:10.740 --> 00:39:11.420
 God's family.

00:39:11.980 --> 00:39:13.079
 You're part of the family.

00:39:13.240 --> 00:39:15.000
 He is now your heavenly

00:39:15.000 --> 00:39:15.460
 father.

00:39:15.539 --> 00:39:16.039
 But I want you to

00:39:16.039 --> 00:39:17.740
 understand God loved you

00:39:17.740 --> 00:39:20.400
 enough even before he was

00:39:20.400 --> 00:39:22.119
 your heavenly father to

00:39:22.119 --> 00:39:23.139
 say I'm going to provide

00:39:23.139 --> 00:39:24.579
 a way for you to become

00:39:24.579 --> 00:39:25.300
 my child.

00:39:25.800 --> 00:39:26.680
 You know what it's called

00:39:26.680 --> 00:39:27.900
 when a father accepts

00:39:27.900 --> 00:39:29.300
 a child that wasn't his

00:39:29.300 --> 00:39:29.820
 naturally.

00:39:30.960 --> 00:39:31.639
 You're adopted.

00:39:31.760 --> 00:39:32.480
 You know the Bible says

00:39:32.480 --> 00:39:33.700
 you're adopted in at the

00:39:33.700 --> 00:39:34.539
 moment of salvation.

00:39:34.940 --> 00:39:36.639
 What a powerful picture.

00:39:37.160 --> 00:39:38.700
 If you've never understood

00:39:38.700 --> 00:39:40.579
 the reality of salvation

00:39:40.579 --> 00:39:43.420
 I encourage you today to

00:39:43.420 --> 00:39:45.800
 call upon him because he

00:39:45.800 --> 00:39:46.500
 is the one.

00:39:46.579 --> 00:39:47.360
 He didn't come to

00:39:47.360 --> 00:39:48.059
 condemn you.

00:39:48.240 --> 00:39:49.680
 He came to set you free.

00:39:51.240 --> 00:39:52.539
 That he might be your

00:39:52.539 --> 00:39:54.960
 loving heavenly father.

00:39:54.960 --> 00:39:55.039
 father.

00:39:57.539 --> 00:39:59.159
 But this morning I want to

00:39:59.159 --> 00:40:00.559
 challenge fathers here on

00:40:00.559 --> 00:40:02.000
 Father's Day but also just

00:40:02.000 --> 00:40:02.500
 parents.

00:40:04.360 --> 00:40:05.699
 I want you to understand

00:40:05.699 --> 00:40:08.199
 that don't take this

00:40:08.199 --> 00:40:09.659
 discouragingly but just a

00:40:09.659 --> 00:40:10.059
 reality.

00:40:10.220 --> 00:40:11.079
 You will not parent

00:40:11.079 --> 00:40:11.599
 perfectly.

00:40:12.300 --> 00:40:13.199
 We are not God.

00:40:13.699 --> 00:40:14.940
 You may not parent

00:40:14.940 --> 00:40:16.460
 perfectly but I encourage

00:40:16.460 --> 00:40:17.880
 you to parent faithfully.

00:40:17.880 --> 00:40:20.900
 to be faithful to the

00:40:20.900 --> 00:40:21.780
 things of God.

00:40:21.780 --> 00:40:23.460
 Because God does not

00:40:23.460 --> 00:40:25.039
 require your perfection.

00:40:25.599 --> 00:40:27.240
 He requires your presence,

00:40:27.619 --> 00:40:28.420
 your consistency,

00:40:28.960 --> 00:40:30.220
 and your love.

00:40:31.059 --> 00:40:32.640
 You know Psalm 103 says

00:40:32.640 --> 00:40:32.900
 this,

00:40:32.960 --> 00:40:34.440
 As a father pitieth his

00:40:34.440 --> 00:40:36.180
 children, so the Lord

00:40:36.180 --> 00:40:37.940
 pitieth them that fear him.

00:40:39.180 --> 00:40:41.460
 So trust the process that

00:40:41.460 --> 00:40:42.680
 God has laid out.

00:40:42.679 --> 00:40:47.019
 But I want you also to let

00:40:47.019 --> 00:40:48.079
 this free you.

00:40:48.379 --> 00:40:49.960
 Even the perfect father's

00:40:49.960 --> 00:40:52.199
 discipline yields its

00:40:52.199 --> 00:40:54.419
 fruit only, notice back in

00:40:54.419 --> 00:40:56.199
 verse 11, to them that are

00:40:56.199 --> 00:40:57.719
 exercised thereby.

00:40:58.519 --> 00:41:00.199
 As a parent your charge is

00:41:00.199 --> 00:41:01.139
 faithfulness.

00:41:02.519 --> 00:41:03.279
 But I'm going to tell you

00:41:03.279 --> 00:41:04.219
 something very clearly.

00:41:04.379 --> 00:41:06.339
 Your child's choice is their

00:41:06.339 --> 00:41:06.619
 own.

00:41:07.339 --> 00:41:08.179
 You know sometimes as

00:41:08.179 --> 00:41:09.679
 parents when our kids don't

00:41:09.679 --> 00:41:11.159
 do what we think we raised

00:41:11.159 --> 00:41:13.000
 them to do, we start asking

00:41:13.000 --> 00:41:13.759
 all sorts of weird

00:41:13.759 --> 00:41:14.299
 questions.

00:41:14.940 --> 00:41:16.059
 But the only question you

00:41:16.059 --> 00:41:17.279
 ought to ask, did I do

00:41:17.279 --> 00:41:19.139
 what I should have done

00:41:19.139 --> 00:41:20.819
 the right way?

00:41:22.219 --> 00:41:23.119
 Because you know what the

00:41:23.119 --> 00:41:23.879
 Bible tells us?

00:41:23.899 --> 00:41:25.039
 That child has a choice.

00:41:25.659 --> 00:41:26.940
 The prodigal son, the

00:41:26.940 --> 00:41:28.019
 father understood the

00:41:28.019 --> 00:41:29.159
 child had a choice.

00:41:30.099 --> 00:41:31.019
 And sometimes you got to

00:41:31.019 --> 00:41:31.899
 allow them to make their

00:41:31.899 --> 00:41:32.379
 choice.

00:41:33.059 --> 00:41:34.460
 But it ought not to change

00:41:34.460 --> 00:41:35.839
 who you are or what you

00:41:35.839 --> 00:41:36.139
 do.

00:41:36.639 --> 00:41:38.059
 You need to be consistent.

00:41:38.059 --> 00:41:42.639
 You can hold the line with

00:41:42.639 --> 00:41:45.259
 love, but your son or

00:41:45.259 --> 00:41:46.840
 daughter must still choose

00:41:46.840 --> 00:41:48.259
 to submit to the things

00:41:48.259 --> 00:41:48.840
 of God.

00:41:49.900 --> 00:41:52.380
 If you've been faithful and

00:41:52.380 --> 00:41:53.799
 those things that harvest

00:41:53.799 --> 00:41:56.000
 of that, you know, that if

00:41:56.000 --> 00:41:57.119
 we're faithful to those

00:41:57.119 --> 00:42:00.099
 things, has not yet come, I

00:42:00.099 --> 00:42:01.239
 want to encourage you, don't

00:42:01.239 --> 00:42:02.980
 carry guilt that belongs to a

00:42:02.980 --> 00:42:05.400
 choice only your child can

00:42:05.400 --> 00:42:05.759
 make.

00:42:05.760 --> 00:42:09.040
 Keep sowing, keep loving,

00:42:09.520 --> 00:42:11.100
 keep believing, keep trusting

00:42:11.100 --> 00:42:15.380
 God and following the truth

00:42:15.380 --> 00:42:16.740
 of His Word.

00:42:18.940 --> 00:42:20.300
 As heads are bowed and eyes

00:42:20.300 --> 00:42:22.160
 are closed this morning, maybe

00:42:22.160 --> 00:42:23.700
 God spoke to your heart this

00:42:23.700 --> 00:42:23.960
 morning.

00:42:25.680 --> 00:42:27.220
 Maybe as a parent there's some

00:42:27.220 --> 00:42:30.980
 things that you say, Lord, I

00:42:30.980 --> 00:42:31.800
 need your forgiveness.

00:42:32.020 --> 00:42:32.980
 Maybe it's even you have to go

00:42:32.980 --> 00:42:34.720
 maybe a little later today you

00:42:34.719 --> 00:42:36.779
 need to go and talk to your

00:42:36.779 --> 00:42:39.419
 kids and say, hey, I was

00:42:39.419 --> 00:42:39.679
 wrong.

00:42:40.239 --> 00:42:41.359
 Maybe you seem to spend some

00:42:41.359 --> 00:42:42.119
 time with the Lord.

00:42:42.219 --> 00:42:43.659
 Maybe that child that's way

00:42:43.659 --> 00:42:44.639
 where you just need to take

00:42:44.639 --> 00:42:48.480
 some time and say, Lord, spark

00:42:48.480 --> 00:42:49.619
 those things they've been

00:42:49.619 --> 00:42:50.000
 taught.

00:42:50.599 --> 00:42:51.699
 Lord, help me, though, to be

00:42:51.699 --> 00:42:52.259
 consistent.

00:42:54.439 --> 00:42:55.879
 This morning, whatever the need

00:42:55.879 --> 00:42:58.699
 might be, whether it's to come

00:42:58.699 --> 00:43:01.439
 to the Father that loves you and

00:43:01.439 --> 00:43:02.839
 cares for you, that wants you to

00:43:02.840 --> 00:43:03.700
 be His child.

00:43:04.920 --> 00:43:06.579
 Or if you're His child and

00:43:06.579 --> 00:43:09.140
 you're struggling with those

00:43:09.140 --> 00:43:10.220
 other things, maybe you're

00:43:10.220 --> 00:43:11.840
 struggling with kids today,

00:43:12.140 --> 00:43:13.320
 whether they're little ones,

00:43:13.660 --> 00:43:17.420
 whether they're two or 40.

00:43:17.960 --> 00:43:19.220
 Will you turn that over to the

00:43:19.220 --> 00:43:20.960
 Lord and say, Lord, help me to

00:43:20.960 --> 00:43:22.559
 do my part.

00:43:23.480 --> 00:43:25.840
 Heavenly Fathers, we just come to

00:43:25.840 --> 00:43:27.220
 you this morning once again,

00:43:27.300 --> 00:43:28.820
 Lord, knowing the truth of your

00:43:28.820 --> 00:43:29.120
 Word.

00:43:29.240 --> 00:43:30.920
 Lord, your Word is what sets us

00:43:30.920 --> 00:43:33.480
 free as we guide and are guided

00:43:33.480 --> 00:43:35.700
 and directed by the truth of

00:43:35.700 --> 00:43:36.119
 your Word.

00:43:36.220 --> 00:43:37.500
 Lord, we pray just be with each

00:43:37.500 --> 00:43:38.300
 one here today.

00:43:39.200 --> 00:43:40.760
 Lord, you know each situation.

00:43:41.700 --> 00:43:43.559
 You know the details that nobody

00:43:43.559 --> 00:43:44.380
 else knows.

00:43:45.920 --> 00:43:47.280
 But Lord, I pray that you would

00:43:47.280 --> 00:43:49.800
 encourage and challenge and even

00:43:49.800 --> 00:43:51.260
 convict, Lord, because your

00:43:51.260 --> 00:43:52.760
 chastening is for a reason.

00:43:54.440 --> 00:43:55.700
 Lord, I pray that you just work

00:43:55.700 --> 00:43:57.420
 mightily in an opportunity for

00:43:57.420 --> 00:43:59.579
 each one here today to come to

00:43:59.579 --> 00:44:03.119
 you, humbly just seeking your

00:44:03.119 --> 00:44:04.659
 direction and your guidance.

00:44:05.440 --> 00:44:06.699
 Lord, if there's one here today

00:44:06.699 --> 00:44:08.259
 that doesn't understand what it

00:44:08.259 --> 00:44:10.279
 means to be truly your child,

00:44:11.599 --> 00:44:13.519
 that they might get that settled

00:44:13.519 --> 00:44:16.360
 in their heart today, that we

00:44:16.360 --> 00:44:17.900
 might not leave and go out those

00:44:17.900 --> 00:44:19.599
 doors the same way we came in.

00:44:20.420 --> 00:44:21.880
 And Lord, we ask it all in your

00:44:21.880 --> 00:44:22.719
 precious name.

00:44:23.599 --> 00:44:23.900
 Amen.

00:44:24.099 --> 00:44:25.579
 As piano plays, what about you

00:44:25.579 --> 00:44:26.000
 today?

00:44:26.000 --> 00:44:26.099
 Amen.

00:44:26.099 --> 00:44:26.139
 Amen.

00:44:26.139 --> 00:44:26.139


00:44:26.139 --> 00:44:26.139


00:44:26.139 --> 00:44:26.139


00:44:26.139 --> 00:44:26.139


00:44:26.139 --> 00:44:26.139


00:44:26.139 --> 00:44:26.139


00:44:26.139 --> 00:44:26.139


00:44:26.139 --> 00:44:26.139