WEBVTT

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 My name's Andy and those of you who I haven't met before, hello.

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 I am together with Jay and Lydia, one of three trainee vicars

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 who are placed with a Christchurch here for this year.

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 I'm the one that you won't have met before, so hello.

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 We arrived, Lucy and Gideon and I, in Bristol in August of last year.

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 It was a bit of a rush getting here.

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 We'd found out quite late that we'd been accepted to come and train at Trinity

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 and we had to organise lots of things.

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 We had to let out our flat.

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 We had to find a place to live here.

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 We needed to, you know, arrange for moving and so on.

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 And so by the time we got here, it felt like a rush getting into the course.

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 And then, you know, a new course like that, it's a new way of life,

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 a new routine to learn, new knowledge to pick up, new friends to meet.

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 And so it was busy.

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 And then we got sick.

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 All three of us managed to get sick in the first half term.

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 And then the deadlines mounted up.

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 And with one thing and another, we went through the entire year

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 and I didn't feel like I had a chance to take a breath.

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 And it was June.

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 It was June by the time I felt like I had a little bit of time

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 and a little bit of space to consider the really huge step that I'd made in my life

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 by agreeing to train to be a vicar.

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 And do you know what flooded into my life, flooded into my heart and my mind

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 on that day when I stopped in a church and thought?

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 It was fear.

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 It was absolute blind terror.

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 Because, you know, I had a good life.

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 I had a good job.

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 We had a nice flat in a nice, exciting part of London.

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 We went to a great church.

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 We were members of a great church.

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 Who wants more than to be a member of a great church?

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 But there I was considering giving up all of that for something really uncertain.

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 You know, becoming a vicar.

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 Becoming a vicar means, Clive will tell you, poor salary.

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 Fewer choices than you get as an independent person following your own career.

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 And also the Church of England is great at times, but sometimes can be a bit funny.

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 And also being a vicar, Clive really does his best to...

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 But it's not cool being a vicar, really.

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 And I realized that I'm somebody for whom it's far, far, far too important

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 to look cool, to look good, to be impressive.

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 So there were lots of genuine reasons why I might be afraid,

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 but I came to realize that most of those were not to do with the C of E.

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 They were to do with me.

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 They were inside of me.

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 So when Clive offered me the chance to preach,

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 and there was the chance to preach on this passage,

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 on this topic,

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 when you love God but you don't love his church,

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 then I was like, that's for me.

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 That's a topic I can speak on.

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 So the book that we've been working through in the series,

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 The Christian Atheist by Craig Rochelle,

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 this chapter is all about people that he comes across in his life

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 who are really committed Christians, love God,

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 but for whatever reason haven't found a commitment to the church,

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 haven't found a way into the church family.

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 And he talks about all the reasons that they give for that,

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 but he also talks about just how important it is

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 to overcome those barriers and to become part of the church,

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 and that's what we're going to talk about today.

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 Craig Rochelle mentions a number of reasons

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 why people don't commit to church,

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 and I can relate to a lot of them.

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 How about you?

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 He talks about people who've been hurt in the past,

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 who've had a bad experience,

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 and that that puts them off committing.

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 People who don't feel that they've got anything to offer,

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 who don't feel confident,

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 who feel like they'd rather play it safe

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 and not commit and not be part of it.

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 And people who just don't feel they can find the right church,

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 the right one that suits them.

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 I can relate to every single one of those reasons,

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 and those reasons hold me back

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 from something that could be a real blessing in my life.

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 The passage we're going to look at today

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 is one of the few times that Jesus mentions the church directly.

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 Jesus had been ministering for a few years by this point.

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 He'd received some praise and some acclaim,

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 but he'd also experienced some opposition.

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 And he just heard at this point some really bad news.

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 His cousin, John the Baptist, had lost his life

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 because of his following the call on his life.

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 So Jesus, knowing what was ahead for him

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 and needing to process this news,

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 he took the disciples off to a solitary place,

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 a place where they could be away from the crowds,

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 where they could talk and have some time.

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 It was quite an amazing time for the disciples.

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 They saw Jesus feed 5,000 people.

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 They saw Jesus walk on water.

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 They saw Jesus transfigured before their eyes

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 into, you know, white clothes and shiningness.

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 And Jesus also talked to them about some tough stuff.

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 He told them that he was going to go on to Jerusalem

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 and he was going to lose his life there.

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 And he wanted really to make sure

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 that they knew who he was as well.

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 So he talked to them about who he was.

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 So in the passage we've just heard,

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 Jesus says,

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 So who do people say that I am?

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 Who do people say the Son of Man is?

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 By which he meant this person in front of you, me.

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 And they said,

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 Oh yes, some say Elijah,

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 some say the prophets,

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 some say John the Baptist.

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 But then he turns the focus on them

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 and he says to them,

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 What about you?

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 What about you?

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 Who do you say I am?

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 And then at that moment,

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 it's Peter's big moment.

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 Peter stands up and he says,

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 Oh, I think I've got the right answer.

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 It's like that Sunday school moment

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 or that school moment, isn't it?

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 I think I've got the right answer.

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 It's inside me.

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 It's coming up.

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 I can feel it.

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 I think it's the right answer.

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 I'm going to say it.

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 I'm going to say it.

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 I'm going to say it.

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 You're the Messiah.

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 You're the Son of God.

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 I can really relate to Peter in that moment.

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 That kind of,

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 he'd seen Jesus ministering.

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 He'd seen a lot of stuff.

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 And he felt like it was adding up for him.

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 He knew what it was all about.

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 There was something in Jesus that was different,

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 that was important,

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 that was special,

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 something of God.

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 And in that moment,

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 when Jesus asked that question,

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 he thought,

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 I'm going to say it.

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 I don't care if I look foolish.

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 I'm going to say it.

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 And that was a moment that changed everything for Peter.

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 Jesus says to him,

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 Blessed are you,

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 Simon,

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 son of Jonah,

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 because this has not been revealed to you

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 by flesh and blood,

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 but by my Father in heaven.

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 He says that Peter,

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 Simon Peter,

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 is blessed

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 because he's heard from God.

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 And that's a blessing.

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 And because he's had the courage

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 to follow up on what he's heard

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 and follow it with his life.

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 And because he's right,

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 because he's got the right answer.

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 He's onto the source of life.

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 And Jesus goes on to say,

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 and I tell you that you are Peter.

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 So often,

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 this disciple's called Simon Peter

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 because Jesus is giving him a new name.

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 Jesus says,

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 you are Peter,

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 and on this rock,

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 I will build my church.

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 This was a humble guy,

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 a bumbling guy.

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 He came from,

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 he was a fisherman.

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 And he came from a backward part of Israel.

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 And he was a guy

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 who got stuff wrong all the time.

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 He was keen,

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 but he got the wrong end of the stick.

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 He failed.

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 He did silly things.

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 And he was going to continue

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 to be all of those things.

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 But actually,

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 in this moment,

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 Jesus is saying,

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 I see beyond that.

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 I see something else beyond that.

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 I see strength in you.

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 I see faithfulness in you.

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 I see something in you

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 that a church can be built on.

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 And it's really significant

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 that he gives Peter

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 this new name,

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 Peter,

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 because of course,

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 Peter is a play on words of rock.

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 So I'm going to build

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 on this rock,

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 my church.

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 But just the mere idea

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 of changing a name

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 is significant in the Bible.

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 Names in the Bible

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 are never coincidental.

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 They're never random.

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 They've always got a deep meaning.

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 And there were two other famous people

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 in the history of God's people

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 whose name was changed.

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 Abraham.

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 His name was changed

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 from Abraham to Abraham.

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 Jacob's name was changed

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 to Israel.

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 And in both cases,

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 God wanted to say something

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 through that change.

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 He wanted to say

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 something about their character,

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 but also something about

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 the role that they were going to play.

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 In all of those,

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 in those two people,

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 God was going to build

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 a new people of God.

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 They were going to be

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 the foundation stones

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 for a new people,

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 a new family,

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 a new people group.

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 And it was the same for Peter.

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 Abraham and Jacob

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 had incredible encounters

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 with God.

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 But not everybody

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 was going to have

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 that kind of encounter.

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 So God created through them

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 a people

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 who could show the world

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 what God was like.

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 And that's what he's doing

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 with Peter as well.

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 Peter was able to walk

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 face to face

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 with Jesus

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 in the years

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 that Jesus was on this planet

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 ministering.

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 How few people

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 get that opportunity.

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 And so God creates

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 through Peter

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 a people group

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 that can show

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 God to the world.

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 It takes a people

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 to change the world.

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 God knows

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 what he's doing.

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 That's always been

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 his way of doing it.

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 And it's his way

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 of doing it now.

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 The church

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 that was described

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 in Acts,

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 in Acts 2

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 and in Acts 4

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 the church

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 that just erupted

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 in Jerusalem.

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 It turned Jerusalem

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 upside down.

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 And some of that

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 was through

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 amazing preaching

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 because Peter

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 became this amazing preacher

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 and the others did too.

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 But as much as that

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 it was about

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 the lives

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 that they lived

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 and people witnessing

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 their lives

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 and going

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 wow

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 there's something

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 different there.

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 There's something

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 important there.

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 There's something

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 life changing there.

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 There's something

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 of God

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 in these people

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 and I want to know more.

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 It's great to be

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 welcoming Joy

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 and Edie

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 into the church

00:10:48.240 --> 00:10:48.920
 family today.

00:10:49.180 --> 00:10:49.879
 And it's exciting

00:10:49.879 --> 00:10:50.460
 to think

00:10:50.460 --> 00:10:51.600
 about Donna

00:10:51.600 --> 00:10:52.120
 and Dave

00:10:52.120 --> 00:10:53.259
 and those two guys.

00:10:53.779 --> 00:10:53.960
 You know

00:10:53.960 --> 00:10:54.960
 what is their family

00:10:54.960 --> 00:10:55.800
 going to become?

00:10:56.600 --> 00:10:57.000
 And who

00:10:57.000 --> 00:10:57.379
 you know

00:10:57.379 --> 00:10:58.480
 what will people

00:10:58.480 --> 00:10:59.259
 that witness

00:10:59.259 --> 00:10:59.899
 their family

00:10:59.899 --> 00:11:01.120
 see in them?

00:11:01.320 --> 00:11:02.240
 Will they see God?

00:11:02.600 --> 00:11:03.480
 I'm sure that they will

00:11:03.480 --> 00:11:04.200
 and it's exciting.

00:11:05.840 --> 00:11:06.259
 I was

00:11:06.259 --> 00:11:07.379
 I stare

00:11:07.379 --> 00:11:08.179
 share a study

00:11:08.179 --> 00:11:09.960
 at my college

00:11:09.960 --> 00:11:10.820
 with a guy called

00:11:10.820 --> 00:11:11.740
 Ben who's amazing.

00:11:11.860 --> 00:11:12.460
 I'm totally

00:11:12.460 --> 00:11:13.399
 in awe of Ben.

00:11:13.939 --> 00:11:14.559
 He and his

00:11:14.559 --> 00:11:15.659
 wife Sarah

00:11:15.659 --> 00:11:16.860
 have got six kids

00:11:16.860 --> 00:11:18.100
 under the age

00:11:18.100 --> 00:11:18.779
 of ten.

00:11:20.220 --> 00:11:21.059
 Six kids.

00:11:21.960 --> 00:11:22.220
 And

00:11:22.220 --> 00:11:23.580
 I had lunch

00:11:23.580 --> 00:11:24.019
 with the

00:11:24.019 --> 00:11:24.919
 on a Friday

00:11:24.919 --> 00:11:25.559
 they often bring

00:11:25.559 --> 00:11:26.960
 their six kids in

00:11:26.960 --> 00:11:28.539
 and I had lunch

00:11:28.539 --> 00:11:28.879
 with them

00:11:28.879 --> 00:11:29.279
 all of them

00:11:29.279 --> 00:11:29.980
 on one big table.

00:11:30.080 --> 00:11:30.539
 It was amazing.

00:11:31.460 --> 00:11:32.299
 They're lovely kids.

00:11:32.840 --> 00:11:33.299
 And I was just

00:11:33.299 --> 00:11:34.460
 talking to Sarah

00:11:34.460 --> 00:11:35.120
 and she was saying

00:11:35.120 --> 00:11:36.580
 God uses their family

00:11:36.580 --> 00:11:37.340
 so much

00:11:37.340 --> 00:11:38.940
 to do his work.

00:11:39.940 --> 00:11:41.280
 They just invite people

00:11:41.280 --> 00:11:42.160
 to come and be part

00:11:42.160 --> 00:11:42.759
 of their family

00:11:42.759 --> 00:11:44.840
 and those people

00:11:44.840 --> 00:11:45.420
 see something

00:11:45.420 --> 00:11:46.000
 in that family

00:11:46.000 --> 00:11:46.519
 that they've not

00:11:46.519 --> 00:11:47.300
 experienced elsewhere.

00:11:47.980 --> 00:11:49.000
 Earlier this year

00:11:49.000 --> 00:11:50.400
 an eleven year old

00:11:50.400 --> 00:11:51.100
 girl who was

00:11:51.100 --> 00:11:52.280
 their neighbour

00:11:52.280 --> 00:11:53.280
 gave her life

00:11:53.280 --> 00:11:53.680
 to Jesus.

00:11:53.860 --> 00:11:55.200
 She doesn't have

00:11:55.200 --> 00:11:56.080
 a church family.

00:11:56.420 --> 00:11:57.019
 She's got no

00:11:57.019 --> 00:11:58.000
 background in church

00:11:58.000 --> 00:11:59.480
 but she was just

00:11:59.480 --> 00:12:00.160
 around their house

00:12:00.160 --> 00:12:00.639
 all the time

00:12:00.639 --> 00:12:01.519
 and she saw

00:12:01.519 --> 00:12:01.960
 in them

00:12:01.960 --> 00:12:03.079
 something amazing

00:12:03.079 --> 00:12:04.720
 and she gave

00:12:04.720 --> 00:12:05.480
 her life to Jesus.

00:12:06.740 --> 00:12:07.279
 I'm sure

00:12:07.279 --> 00:12:08.159
 you could tell

00:12:08.159 --> 00:12:09.139
 stories like that

00:12:09.139 --> 00:12:11.480
 of your family

00:12:11.480 --> 00:12:12.519
 or your friends

00:12:12.519 --> 00:12:13.559
 of your church.

00:12:13.659 --> 00:12:14.259
 I could tell you

00:12:14.259 --> 00:12:14.699
 a story.

00:12:17.100 --> 00:12:18.480
 In my church

00:12:18.480 --> 00:12:19.079
 in King's Cross

00:12:19.079 --> 00:12:19.899
 every year

00:12:19.899 --> 00:12:20.899
 we do a social

00:12:20.899 --> 00:12:21.740
 outreach project

00:12:21.740 --> 00:12:22.919
 in a deprived

00:12:22.919 --> 00:12:23.919
 estate near us

00:12:23.919 --> 00:12:26.000
 and we do

00:12:26.000 --> 00:12:27.100
 improvement works

00:12:27.100 --> 00:12:28.159
 in the estate

00:12:28.159 --> 00:12:28.919
 we do social

00:12:28.919 --> 00:12:29.399
 activities

00:12:29.399 --> 00:12:29.980
 and sometimes

00:12:29.980 --> 00:12:30.539
 we decorate

00:12:30.539 --> 00:12:31.340
 people's houses

00:12:31.340 --> 00:12:32.700
 and there was

00:12:32.700 --> 00:12:33.120
 one guy

00:12:33.120 --> 00:12:33.560
 a couple of

00:12:33.560 --> 00:12:34.080
 years ago

00:12:34.080 --> 00:12:34.879
 who had

00:12:34.879 --> 00:12:35.879
 just so profound

00:12:35.879 --> 00:12:36.259
 needs

00:12:36.259 --> 00:12:37.080
 such multiple

00:12:37.080 --> 00:12:37.560
 needs

00:12:37.560 --> 00:12:38.460
 his name

00:12:38.460 --> 00:12:39.019
 was Joseph

00:12:39.019 --> 00:12:40.399
 and when we

00:12:40.399 --> 00:12:41.019
 went round

00:12:41.019 --> 00:12:41.620
 to his house

00:12:41.620 --> 00:12:42.379
 they'd ask

00:12:42.379 --> 00:12:42.800
 could we help

00:12:42.800 --> 00:12:43.240
 to decorate

00:12:43.240 --> 00:12:43.700
 his house

00:12:43.700 --> 00:12:44.200
 and it was

00:12:44.200 --> 00:12:45.920
 phenomenal

00:12:45.920 --> 00:12:46.800
 to see the

00:12:46.800 --> 00:12:47.540
 state that he

00:12:47.540 --> 00:12:48.080
 was living in

00:12:48.080 --> 00:12:48.960
 I couldn't

00:12:48.960 --> 00:12:49.440
 believe it

00:12:49.440 --> 00:12:51.540
 it was dirty

00:12:51.540 --> 00:12:52.800
 it was untidy

00:12:52.800 --> 00:12:54.280
 it was dilapidated

00:12:54.280 --> 00:12:56.980
 and so we went

00:12:56.980 --> 00:12:57.280
 in there

00:12:57.280 --> 00:12:58.220
 and we decorated

00:12:58.220 --> 00:12:59.340
 and we did

00:12:59.340 --> 00:12:59.860
 a great job

00:12:59.860 --> 00:13:00.440
 we cleaned it

00:13:00.440 --> 00:13:00.879
 and cleaned it

00:13:00.879 --> 00:13:02.419
 and we redecorated

00:13:02.419 --> 00:13:02.860
 and it looked

00:13:02.860 --> 00:13:03.500
 great at the end

00:13:03.500 --> 00:13:04.439
 but much more

00:13:04.439 --> 00:13:05.179
 profound than

00:13:05.179 --> 00:13:05.700
 the decoration

00:13:05.700 --> 00:13:06.299
 of his flat

00:13:06.299 --> 00:13:07.340
 was the experience

00:13:07.340 --> 00:13:08.439
 that Joseph had

00:13:08.439 --> 00:13:09.200
 in those days

00:13:09.200 --> 00:13:10.379
 as I say

00:13:10.379 --> 00:13:10.960
 he's an elderly

00:13:10.960 --> 00:13:11.919
 guy with really

00:13:11.919 --> 00:13:13.000
 profound needs

00:13:13.000 --> 00:13:14.000
 and he was

00:13:14.000 --> 00:13:14.720
 very lonely

00:13:14.720 --> 00:13:16.679
 it says in the

00:13:16.679 --> 00:13:17.159
 bible that

00:13:17.159 --> 00:13:18.279
 God puts the

00:13:18.279 --> 00:13:19.120
 lonely in families

00:13:19.120 --> 00:13:21.519
 and for those

00:13:21.519 --> 00:13:22.000
 days

00:13:22.000 --> 00:13:23.360
 we had to get

00:13:23.360 --> 00:13:23.779
 him out of his

00:13:23.779 --> 00:13:24.220
 flat because we

00:13:24.220 --> 00:13:24.960
 were decorating it

00:13:24.960 --> 00:13:25.659
 and so we just

00:13:25.659 --> 00:13:26.700
 surrounded him

00:13:26.700 --> 00:13:27.259
 with people who

00:13:27.259 --> 00:13:28.000
 looked after him

00:13:28.000 --> 00:13:28.580
 and loved him

00:13:28.580 --> 00:13:30.200
 and it affected

00:13:30.200 --> 00:13:30.940
 him profoundly

00:13:30.940 --> 00:13:31.600
 we stayed in

00:13:31.600 --> 00:13:32.139
 touch with him

00:13:32.139 --> 00:13:33.200
 sadly a few

00:13:33.200 --> 00:13:33.759
 months later he

00:13:33.759 --> 00:13:35.179
 died but do you

00:13:35.179 --> 00:13:36.120
 know what I know

00:13:36.120 --> 00:13:37.220
 that those days

00:13:37.220 --> 00:13:37.860
 and the months

00:13:37.860 --> 00:13:39.220
 afterwards were an

00:13:39.220 --> 00:13:39.960
 experience of heaven

00:13:39.960 --> 00:13:42.259
 for him because he

00:13:42.259 --> 00:13:44.059
 had been he'd

00:13:44.059 --> 00:13:44.700
 experienced love

00:13:44.700 --> 00:13:45.240
 he'd experienced

00:13:45.240 --> 00:13:46.639
 God in meeting us

00:13:46.639 --> 00:13:47.980
 I know you can tell

00:13:47.980 --> 00:13:48.879
 stories just like

00:13:48.879 --> 00:13:51.259
 that that's why the

00:13:51.259 --> 00:13:52.080
 church exists

00:13:52.080 --> 00:13:54.919
 because it takes a

00:13:54.919 --> 00:13:56.000
 people it takes a

00:13:56.000 --> 00:13:57.460
 family it takes a

00:13:57.460 --> 00:13:58.480
 group to change

00:13:58.480 --> 00:13:59.559
 the world it takes

00:13:59.559 --> 00:14:00.840
 a group to show

00:14:00.840 --> 00:14:03.179
 God and that's the

00:14:03.179 --> 00:14:04.860
 invitation that is

00:14:04.860 --> 00:14:05.779
 ours this morning

00:14:05.779 --> 00:14:08.240
 God is God has

00:14:08.240 --> 00:14:09.039
 always worked through

00:14:09.039 --> 00:14:09.639
 a group of people

00:14:09.639 --> 00:14:10.620
 he needs a group of

00:14:10.620 --> 00:14:11.940
 people to show the

00:14:11.940 --> 00:14:14.419
 world himself and

00:14:14.419 --> 00:14:15.519
 his invitation to you

00:14:15.519 --> 00:14:16.379
 and his invitation to

00:14:16.379 --> 00:14:17.139
 me is do you want to

00:14:17.139 --> 00:14:19.360
 be part of that do you

00:14:19.360 --> 00:14:20.220
 want to be part of

00:14:20.220 --> 00:14:22.100
 something like that and

00:14:22.100 --> 00:14:22.720
 I don't know about you

00:14:22.720 --> 00:14:24.000
 but my answer is yes

00:14:24.000 --> 00:14:27.200
 but then my courage

00:14:27.200 --> 00:14:30.340
 fails it took courage

00:14:30.340 --> 00:14:31.519
 for Peter to respond

00:14:31.519 --> 00:14:32.500
 in that moment that

00:14:32.500 --> 00:14:33.019
 we've been talking

00:14:33.019 --> 00:14:34.340
 about I know who

00:14:34.340 --> 00:14:35.700
 Jesus is I know it's

00:14:35.700 --> 00:14:37.379
 inside of me I can see

00:14:37.379 --> 00:14:38.379
 it but it would have

00:14:38.379 --> 00:14:39.379
 been terrifying to have

00:14:39.379 --> 00:14:40.340
 said that thing that he

00:14:40.340 --> 00:14:41.200
 had to say in front of

00:14:41.200 --> 00:14:42.879
 everybody and it would

00:14:42.879 --> 00:14:43.799
 have been terrifying for

00:14:43.799 --> 00:14:44.779
 him to have followed

00:14:44.779 --> 00:14:45.799
 the call that was on his

00:14:45.799 --> 00:14:46.759
 life from that day on

00:14:46.759 --> 00:14:48.860
 he followed Jesus to

00:14:48.860 --> 00:14:50.200
 Jerusalem watched him

00:14:50.200 --> 00:14:52.740
 executed his friends and

00:14:52.740 --> 00:14:55.360
 families scattered he

00:14:55.360 --> 00:14:56.320
 went on to speak in

00:14:56.320 --> 00:14:57.419
 front of thousands of

00:14:57.419 --> 00:14:59.879
 people in Jerusalem he

00:14:59.879 --> 00:15:00.539
 spoke in front of

00:15:00.539 --> 00:15:01.340
 authorities that were

00:15:01.340 --> 00:15:01.980
 trying to put him

00:15:01.980 --> 00:15:02.779
 behind bars they

00:15:02.779 --> 00:15:03.820
 succeeded in putting him

00:15:03.820 --> 00:15:05.399
 behind bars he

00:15:05.399 --> 00:15:07.680
 eventually died in Rome

00:15:07.680 --> 00:15:08.759
 because of his faith

00:15:08.759 --> 00:15:10.460
 he's martyred in Rome

00:15:10.460 --> 00:15:12.820
 they say that he was

00:15:12.820 --> 00:15:15.639
 crucified upside down

00:15:15.639 --> 00:15:16.879
 right because he didn't

00:15:16.879 --> 00:15:18.100
 want to be crucified the

00:15:18.100 --> 00:15:19.139
 way that Jesus had been

00:15:19.139 --> 00:15:22.000
 so huge huge consequences

00:15:22.000 --> 00:15:22.860
 from follow that call

00:15:22.860 --> 00:15:24.279
 but I don't think he

00:15:24.279 --> 00:15:25.200
 would have chosen anything

00:15:25.200 --> 00:15:28.379
 different you know he's

00:15:28.379 --> 00:15:29.779
 he was part of founding a

00:15:29.779 --> 00:15:30.700
 movement that literally

00:15:30.700 --> 00:15:32.240
 billions and billions and

00:15:32.240 --> 00:15:33.580
 billions of people have

00:15:33.580 --> 00:15:35.779
 signed up to since then I

00:15:35.779 --> 00:15:36.700
 don't think he'd choose

00:15:36.700 --> 00:15:40.659
 anything different as for

00:15:40.659 --> 00:15:43.379
 me I feel God is calling

00:15:43.379 --> 00:15:45.340
 me to consider this thing

00:15:45.340 --> 00:15:48.580
 about vicaring it's just a

00:15:48.580 --> 00:15:49.720
 from it's that's the

00:15:49.720 --> 00:15:50.899
 particular type of calling

00:15:50.899 --> 00:15:51.980
 that he seems to be

00:15:51.980 --> 00:15:54.500
 talking to me about and my

00:15:54.500 --> 00:15:57.180
 courage fails I'm terrified

00:15:57.180 --> 00:15:59.220
 but I'm determined to

00:15:59.220 --> 00:16:01.820
 follow the call somehow

00:16:01.820 --> 00:16:04.080
 anyway Lucy and I my wife

00:16:04.080 --> 00:16:05.000
 we're talking about this

00:16:05.000 --> 00:16:06.580
 fear what is this fear that

00:16:06.580 --> 00:16:07.740
 you've got in you Andy where

00:16:07.740 --> 00:16:09.720
 does it come from why is that

00:16:09.720 --> 00:16:10.800
 holding you back how can we

00:16:10.800 --> 00:16:12.920
 change that and I'm hopeful

00:16:12.920 --> 00:16:16.200
 that we'll manage but I

00:16:16.200 --> 00:16:17.300
 wanted to ask you what about

00:16:17.300 --> 00:16:20.720
 you what's the step that

00:16:20.720 --> 00:16:22.420
 you feel God is asking of

00:16:22.420 --> 00:16:25.500
 you what's the commitment to

00:16:25.500 --> 00:16:27.360
 his church or to him in your

00:16:27.360 --> 00:16:29.720
 life that he's asking of you

00:16:29.720 --> 00:16:30.280
 today

00:16:30.279 --> 00:16:47.740
 you

00:16:47.740 --> 00:16:49.139
 me

00:16:49.139 --> 00:16:53.519
 yeah