WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 This morning's sermon is difficult. It's been difficult to prepare and it's certainly difficult to preach. 00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:23.000 ! And it's difficult on lots of different levels. My guess is that there's not a single person in this room who's not been affected in some way by divorce. 00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:34.000 In our families there are people who we deeply love and have experienced it. There are friends out there that we know who are walking through a divorce. 00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:41.000 Maybe a bitter one. Maybe few that personally you know the pain of it. 00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:49.000 Part of my reason for teaching on it this morning is we've come to that part of Matthew. We've come to Matthew 19. 00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:53.000 But we all need to know, don't we? The Bible doesn't hide these things from us. 00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:58.000 We need to know what love looks like in hard places. 00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:03.000 And there are difficult sermons to preach because sometimes life is difficult. 00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:08.000 More brutally difficult than we ever imagined it would be. 00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 And so this morning it may be that this morning is not what you need. 00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 Maybe it's what someone else needs. 00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:21.000 And it may be that one day it is what you need. 00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:25.000 Certainly it's what you need to help someone else. 00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:31.000 And I want to dive right in. I'm going to give you six Biblical principles on divorce. 00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:34.000 Mainly based in Matthew 19. 00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:38.000 And I want to be upfront. I'm going to lean quite heavily. I've read quite a lot this week. 00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:41.000 I'm going to lean quite heavily on a report by the Free Church of Scotland. 00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:45.000 And that they produced on an article by Kevin DeYoung. 00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.000 First of all, my first principle is this. 00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:54.000 Jesus says start with the intention before concession. 00:01:54.000 --> 00:02:05.000 Jesus tells us that when you do your difficult thinking about this difficult issue of divorce. 00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:09.000 Start your thinking with God's intention for marriage. 00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:13.000 Before you come to the concessions which God gives for divorce. 00:02:13.000 --> 00:02:16.000 Start with what God intended. 00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:19.000 Before you look at what he concedes. 00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:21.000 And where you start from is so important. 00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:24.000 And in Matthew 19, do you see the Pharisees? 00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:26.000 And those kind of religious leaders. 00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:30.000 They're coming to Jesus and getting to comment on divorce. 00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:35.000 And they're asking him what he thinks about something way down the line. 00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:37.000 In the Bible story. 00:02:37.000 --> 00:02:39.000 And Jesus says, we'll come to that in a moment. 00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:41.000 He says, I know what you're asking about. 00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:43.000 And I know where you're going with this. 00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:44.000 I know your line of travel. 00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:47.000 But you're forgetting the Bible's beginning. 00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:51.000 And so he says, look at what the Bible at the beginning says about marriage. 00:02:51.000 --> 00:02:54.000 Chapter 19 in verse 3. 00:02:54.000 --> 00:02:57.000 And they ask this question, don't they? 00:02:57.000 --> 00:03:03.000 They come to test him by asking, is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause? 00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:10.000 And the question comes directly from Deuteronomy chapter 24, the fourth book of the Bible. 00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:13.000 The fifth book of the Bible. 00:03:13.000 --> 00:03:15.000 It's a very important passage. 00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:17.000 And we'll look at it in a moment. 00:03:17.000 --> 00:03:20.000 Deuteronomy is book five of the law. 00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:28.000 It is Moses speaking to the people of Israel as they're about to go into the promised land. 00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:32.000 And Jesus says, I see you've got your copy of Deuteronomy. 00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:35.000 But have you got your copy of Genesis with you? 00:03:35.000 --> 00:03:39.000 He answered verse 4. 00:03:39.000 --> 00:03:46.000 Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female? 00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:54.000 And said, therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. 00:03:54.000 --> 00:03:56.000 That is hugely important for you and I. 00:03:56.000 --> 00:03:58.000 For two reasons. 00:03:59.000 --> 00:04:03.000 The main thing that Jesus says to us about divorce is this. 00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:05.000 Don't do it. 00:04:05.000 --> 00:04:07.000 Don't do it. 00:04:07.000 --> 00:04:18.000 You're talking to me, says Jesus, about the acceptable concessions for one, that God has made one to become two again. 00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:23.000 That God's original intention for two to become one and to stay one. 00:04:23.000 --> 00:04:29.000 And so marriage is a sacred union between one man and one woman. 00:04:29.000 --> 00:04:36.000 And God gave it to help men and women live together in the world that he has created. 00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:41.000 And God's intention and his plan for marriage is for it to last a lifetime. 00:04:41.000 --> 00:04:47.000 The principle here is that the original is weightier, heavier. 00:04:47.000 --> 00:04:50.000 Yes, there are concessions. 00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:53.000 But the original intention is the best. 00:04:53.000 --> 00:04:58.000 Advertising uses this again and again, doesn't it? 00:04:58.000 --> 00:05:03.000 Levi jeans, still the original and still the best. 00:05:03.000 --> 00:05:09.000 And it may be that some of us who are married to you today, maybe you're delightfully, happily married. 00:05:09.000 --> 00:05:15.000 It may be that one day you find yourself looking for a way out. 00:05:15.000 --> 00:05:20.000 You find yourself looking for a valid reason to walk away. 00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:27.000 And Jesus says, you start with what God intends for your marriage before you do anything else. 00:05:27.000 --> 00:05:30.000 Here's why, the second thing. 00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:33.000 And the original intention shows God's tender heart. 00:05:33.000 --> 00:05:41.000 That's the original intention, that it shows God's tender heart and the concessions reveal our hard hearts. 00:05:41.000 --> 00:05:46.000 You see that in verse 7 and 8? 00:05:46.000 --> 00:05:52.000 Yes, Jesus may be raising the bar for us, keeping it high, but he's tender. 00:05:52.000 --> 00:05:53.000 He's also tender. 00:05:53.000 --> 00:05:59.000 Do you notice in verse 3 why the Pharisees came to him? 00:05:59.000 --> 00:06:02.000 They came to him to test him. 00:06:02.000 --> 00:06:10.000 The Pharisees are not church elders in perplexity, desperately trying to help someone in their congregation. 00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:12.000 That's not what they are. 00:06:12.000 --> 00:06:18.000 They're not grappling pastorally with this, with wisdom and with grace and with love. 00:06:18.000 --> 00:06:25.000 No, here's a chance to trap Jesus himself. 00:06:25.000 --> 00:06:27.000 It's a trap. 00:06:27.000 --> 00:06:32.000 Will you be conservative or will you be liberal? 00:06:32.000 --> 00:06:39.000 And in Jesus' day, this question, is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause? 00:06:39.000 --> 00:06:47.000 Some literally were saying, if she burns the evening meal, that is a reason that you can get rid of her. 00:06:47.000 --> 00:06:52.000 If she does something in the day that you find offensive, well you can divorce her. 00:06:52.000 --> 00:06:55.000 Is that okay, Jesus? 00:06:55.000 --> 00:06:58.000 Is that grounds for divorce? 00:06:58.000 --> 00:07:05.000 And before he answers, and he will answer, Jesus goes back all the way to Genesis. 00:07:05.000 --> 00:07:11.000 He says, look, the reason we're asking this question shows how far we've fallen. 00:07:11.000 --> 00:07:19.000 For when somebody leaves in a marriage, they are pulling apart what God has joined together. 00:07:19.000 --> 00:07:23.000 It's very, very important to know that. 00:07:23.000 --> 00:07:33.000 Every marriage in every part of the world, in every religion, whether it happens in a church or a registry office or a beach or a golf course, 00:07:33.000 --> 00:07:36.000 every marriage happens before God. 00:07:38.000 --> 00:07:42.000 And he designs the gluing together. 00:07:42.000 --> 00:07:44.000 And every divorce tears it apart. 00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:47.000 And the Pharisees just want to know, don't they? 00:07:47.000 --> 00:07:49.000 Well, when's it okay just to tear it apart? 00:07:49.000 --> 00:07:55.000 And Jesus says, why are there no tears in your eyes when you talk about divorce? 00:07:56.000 --> 00:08:03.000 And I think Jesus is tender here because he sees two people join, a man and a woman. 00:08:03.000 --> 00:08:06.000 The Pharisees see the men. 00:08:06.000 --> 00:08:10.000 And what they're allowed to do to their wives. 00:08:10.000 --> 00:08:15.000 But Jesus says, sees what God loves to unite. 00:08:15.000 --> 00:08:18.000 Humankind always divides, doesn't it? 00:08:18.000 --> 00:08:23.000 But Jesus is saying that the original intention matters so much. 00:08:23.000 --> 00:08:26.000 Because God didn't just put your wife beside you. 00:08:26.000 --> 00:08:29.000 He glued you to each other. 00:08:29.000 --> 00:08:33.000 And you are saying that divorce is sending away. 00:08:33.000 --> 00:08:38.000 But actually Jesus says, I want to teach you that divorce is amputation. 00:08:42.000 --> 00:08:46.000 One of these approaches to divorce is cruel and the other is tender. 00:08:46.000 --> 00:08:52.000 Jesus knows the immense pain that divorce can bring. 00:08:52.000 --> 00:08:57.000 You're wrapping presents and you get salad tape. 00:08:57.000 --> 00:09:01.000 And you cut the salad tape and it folds back on itself. 00:09:01.000 --> 00:09:03.000 You know that feeling? 00:09:03.000 --> 00:09:08.000 And you try to unstick it but you can't, can you? 00:09:09.000 --> 00:09:11.000 You get an envelope. 00:09:11.000 --> 00:09:13.000 And you lick the envelope. 00:09:13.000 --> 00:09:16.000 And then you remember, oh, I forgot to put the gift token in. 00:09:16.000 --> 00:09:17.000 I forgot to put the cash in. 00:09:17.000 --> 00:09:24.000 And so you go to open up the envelope and it's dried and you rip the envelope. 00:09:24.000 --> 00:09:27.000 Children, you get two pieces of paper and you glue them together. 00:09:27.000 --> 00:09:29.000 And then you realise, oh, I shouldn't have done that. 00:09:29.000 --> 00:09:30.000 So you've got to pull them apart. 00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:32.000 And they're different colours of pieces of paper. 00:09:32.000 --> 00:09:34.000 And as you pull them apart, what happens? 00:09:34.000 --> 00:09:36.000 It is messy, isn't it? 00:09:36.000 --> 00:09:39.000 And there's bits of paper on the other bits of paper. 00:09:39.000 --> 00:09:42.000 And you can't cleanly break it because it's like amputation. 00:09:42.000 --> 00:09:52.000 So divorce people often speak how the divorce tears apart the very fabric of who they are. 00:09:53.000 --> 00:09:54.000 As a man and a woman. 00:09:54.000 --> 00:10:03.000 And two people cannot be united in a one flesh union and then be separated and be just the same as they ever were. 00:10:03.000 --> 00:10:08.000 Divorce means nothing will ever be the same again. 00:10:08.000 --> 00:10:14.000 And our Lord Jesus knows the price of separation is very, very high. 00:10:14.000 --> 00:10:17.000 And the Pharisees, they look at the data. 00:10:17.000 --> 00:10:19.000 But Jesus looks at the people. 00:10:19.000 --> 00:10:23.000 And the Pharisees want to tick boxes and make hard and fast rules. 00:10:23.000 --> 00:10:25.000 And Jesus sees a world of pain. 00:10:25.000 --> 00:10:28.000 And so number one, start with the intention. 00:10:28.000 --> 00:10:29.000 Number two. 00:10:29.000 --> 00:10:32.000 Number two, divorce is not always sinful. 00:10:32.000 --> 00:10:36.000 Divorce is not always sinful. 00:10:36.000 --> 00:10:38.000 You start with God's intention. 00:10:38.000 --> 00:10:42.000 One man, one woman in a union for life. 00:10:42.000 --> 00:10:44.000 But there is a but, isn't there? 00:10:44.000 --> 00:10:50.000 We know that God's gardeners, Adam and Eve, actually became vandals. 00:10:50.000 --> 00:10:55.000 And with them, every man and woman who's lived after them have had the same problem. 00:10:55.000 --> 00:11:05.000 And there is now no one flesh union of any man and woman that is not in some way spoiled. 00:11:05.000 --> 00:11:09.000 And which does not in some way continue the spoiling of the world. 00:11:09.000 --> 00:11:11.000 We are fallen. 00:11:11.000 --> 00:11:15.000 And fallen unions sometimes fail. 00:11:15.000 --> 00:11:19.000 And here is what we need to say. 00:11:19.000 --> 00:11:23.000 Every divorce is the product of sin. 00:11:23.000 --> 00:11:27.000 But not every divorce is therefore sinful. 00:11:27.000 --> 00:11:29.000 Do you get that? 00:11:29.000 --> 00:11:33.000 Every divorce is the product of sin. 00:11:33.000 --> 00:11:37.000 But not every divorce is therefore sinful. 00:11:37.000 --> 00:11:43.000 In Malachi chapter 2, the Bible very clearly says God hates divorce. 00:11:43.000 --> 00:11:44.000 So do you. 00:11:44.000 --> 00:11:47.000 So do you. 00:11:47.000 --> 00:11:54.000 And some Christians have argued and do argue that there can only be some very, very extreme cases for divorce. 00:11:54.000 --> 00:11:59.000 And a minority of Christians have argued that there can be no grounds for divorce ever. 00:11:59.000 --> 00:12:03.000 And I think that view does immense damage. 00:12:03.000 --> 00:12:08.000 What that view gets right is that every divorce is the product of sin. 00:12:08.000 --> 00:12:12.000 But what it gets wrong is to assume that every divorce is therefore sinful. 00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:15.000 So if you'll come with me to Jeremiah chapter 3. 00:12:15.000 --> 00:12:18.000 So if you'll come back, it's on page 6 to 9. 00:12:18.000 --> 00:12:21.000 I do want you to go there because it's a remarkable passage. 00:12:21.000 --> 00:12:22.000 Jeremiah chapter 3. 00:12:22.000 --> 00:12:26.000 And again, if you haven't got a Bible, do that walk of shame to the back and grab one. 00:12:26.000 --> 00:12:29.000 Jeremiah chapter 3, page 6 to 9. 00:12:29.000 --> 00:12:34.000 And I want to read you from verses 6 to 8. 00:12:34.000 --> 00:12:40.000 Jeremiah chapter 3, page 6 to 9 in the church Bible. 00:12:40.000 --> 00:12:42.000 So I'm going to jump around a little bit this morning. 00:12:42.000 --> 00:12:46.000 Jeremiah says, 00:12:46.000 --> 00:12:49.000 The Lord said to me in the days of King Josiah, 00:12:49.000 --> 00:12:51.000 Have you seen what she did? 00:12:51.000 --> 00:12:53.000 That's the people of Israel, the church. 00:12:53.000 --> 00:12:56.000 That faithless one, Israel. 00:12:56.000 --> 00:13:01.000 How she went up every high hill and under every green tree. 00:13:01.000 --> 00:13:03.000 And there she played the whore. 00:13:03.000 --> 00:13:09.000 And I thought, after she has done all this, she will return to me. 00:13:09.000 --> 00:13:11.000 But she did not return. 00:13:11.000 --> 00:13:16.000 And her treacherous sister, Judah, did not fear. 00:13:16.000 --> 00:13:18.000 It's going to be split into two. 00:13:18.000 --> 00:13:20.000 But she too went. 00:13:20.000 --> 00:13:22.000 And she played the whore. 00:13:22.000 --> 00:13:29.000 Because she took her whoredom lightly, she polluted the land, committing adultery with stone and tree. 00:13:29.000 --> 00:13:30.000 Sorry. 00:13:30.000 --> 00:13:31.000 Verse 8. 00:13:31.000 --> 00:13:38.000 She saw that for all the adulteries of that faithful one Israel, I had sent her away. 00:13:38.000 --> 00:13:39.000 And here's the key point. 00:13:39.000 --> 00:13:41.000 With a decree of divorce. 00:13:41.000 --> 00:13:48.000 Israel's worship of her false god. 00:13:48.000 --> 00:13:50.000 God says it's like prostitution. 00:13:50.000 --> 00:13:51.000 It's sinful. 00:13:51.000 --> 00:13:53.000 And do you see what he does? 00:13:53.000 --> 00:13:54.000 Verse 8. 00:13:54.000 --> 00:13:56.000 He divorces her. 00:13:56.000 --> 00:14:02.000 It's actually an amazing picture of what the exile is. 00:14:02.000 --> 00:14:09.000 That she's been sent off into captivity. 00:14:09.000 --> 00:14:15.000 And God says it's like my wife being sent away with a certificate of divorce. 00:14:15.000 --> 00:14:18.000 Every divorce is a product of sin. 00:14:18.000 --> 00:14:23.000 And yet God himself is not sinning by cutting her off from the land. 00:14:23.000 --> 00:14:26.000 Do you see that? 00:14:26.000 --> 00:14:33.000 Many people in churches have had to live with the stigma of divorce and the shadow of suspicion. 00:14:33.000 --> 00:14:37.000 That's cast a long and dark shadow over them. 00:14:37.000 --> 00:14:38.000 And it's not right. 00:14:38.000 --> 00:14:48.000 Because God himself at one time, in an incredible way, dare I say it, God becomes a divorcee. 00:14:48.000 --> 00:14:53.000 And many people, maybe you this morning, you feel a deep sense of shame today. 00:14:53.000 --> 00:14:59.000 Because we've not been clear enough about the fact that not every divorce is sinful. 00:14:59.000 --> 00:15:03.000 We need to be clear that some divorces are, certainly. 00:15:03.000 --> 00:15:05.000 But not everyone. 00:15:05.000 --> 00:15:12.000 And so what are the grounds for a divorce that is not itself an act of sin? 00:15:12.000 --> 00:15:16.000 And I think there are three, and here they are, the next three principles. 00:15:16.000 --> 00:15:23.000 Number three, divorce is permitted, but not compulsory for sexual immorality. 00:15:23.000 --> 00:15:26.000 Just notice the language there. 00:15:26.000 --> 00:15:29.000 Divorce is permitted, not compulsory. 00:15:29.000 --> 00:15:33.000 I'm going to use that language for the next two points as well. 00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:36.000 Permitted, but not compulsory. 00:15:36.000 --> 00:15:42.000 And we're going to look at the permission each time, and then I'm going to say something at the end about the not compulsory bit. 00:15:42.000 --> 00:15:47.000 Here's the first ground. Permitted, but not compulsory. And it's sexual immorality. 00:15:47.000 --> 00:15:52.000 This is Matthew chapter 19 and verse 9. 00:15:52.000 --> 00:15:57.000 And what we need to see here is that Jesus has been asked to walk into a very specific trap. 00:15:57.000 --> 00:16:02.000 Verse 9 is his answer to the question of verse 3. 00:16:02.000 --> 00:16:05.000 And verse 3 comes from Deuteronomy chapter 24 verse 1. 00:16:05.000 --> 00:16:10.000 This little phrase in verse 1, if a man finds some indecency in his wife. 00:16:10.000 --> 00:16:12.000 What does that mean? 00:16:12.000 --> 00:16:14.000 It's a really ambiguous term. 00:16:14.000 --> 00:16:19.000 And even to us as we look in our Bibles, it's ambiguous. 00:16:19.000 --> 00:16:22.000 And it was as ambiguous as the Jews in their day. 00:16:22.000 --> 00:16:24.000 They argued about it constantly. 00:16:24.000 --> 00:16:28.000 In general, the word means something repulsive. 00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:30.000 But what exactly? 00:16:30.000 --> 00:16:35.000 And as usually happens when there's a really contentious issue, a spirit emerges. 00:16:35.000 --> 00:16:43.000 And so there are those who are on the more conservative side that say that this phrase, some indecency, 00:16:43.000 --> 00:16:47.000 it means unchastity, it means kind of sexual expression outside of marriage. 00:16:47.000 --> 00:16:49.000 Sexual unfaithfulness. 00:16:49.000 --> 00:16:51.000 That's what's in the frame here. 00:16:51.000 --> 00:16:55.000 The other school of thought, which is more liberal if you like, widened it. 00:16:55.000 --> 00:17:00.000 And so said basically anything that's offensive is a grounds for a divorce. 00:17:00.000 --> 00:17:02.000 Spoiled dinner at the table. 00:17:02.000 --> 00:17:03.000 That's something anti-sook. 00:17:03.000 --> 00:17:04.000 Which is it to be? 00:17:04.000 --> 00:17:06.000 But it's a really significant issue, isn't it? 00:17:06.000 --> 00:17:12.000 One opens the door very wide to divorce for almost anything. 00:17:12.000 --> 00:17:16.000 Anything the husband deems worthy of divorce. 00:17:16.000 --> 00:17:20.000 The other narrows the door of divorce to sexual misconduct. 00:17:20.000 --> 00:17:28.000 So Matthew 19 verse 3, when the Pharisees ask Jesus, is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause for some indecency? 00:17:28.000 --> 00:17:31.000 What they want to know is, which side will you take Jesus? 00:17:31.000 --> 00:17:39.000 You come from the synagogue or walking in the vineyard and the house is a mess at the end of a day's work. 00:17:39.000 --> 00:17:41.000 You have an argument. 00:17:41.000 --> 00:17:48.000 You enter in your marriage into a kind of season of difficulty where it just seems you rub each other up the wrong way and you don't get on. 00:17:48.000 --> 00:17:52.000 Or there's a distance in your marriage and you think it's your wife's fault. 00:17:52.000 --> 00:17:56.000 Jesus, is it time for the divorce courts? 00:17:56.000 --> 00:18:05.000 Or is divorce only possible when that one flesh union has been breached in some way? 00:18:05.000 --> 00:18:08.000 And Jesus is really explicit, isn't he? 00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:12.000 He says the more limited ground for divorce is right. 00:18:12.000 --> 00:18:14.000 Sexual immorality. 00:18:14.000 --> 00:18:16.000 Isn't he tender? 00:18:16.000 --> 00:18:20.000 Isn't he protective of women? 00:18:20.000 --> 00:18:25.000 The men who want to discard their women? 00:18:25.000 --> 00:18:31.000 No, you may not cast her away quickly, easily, sir. 00:18:31.000 --> 00:18:39.000 The word here, sexual immorality, I think it includes, but it is not limited just to sexual intercourse. 00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:42.000 Gross lewdness. 00:18:43.000 --> 00:18:48.000 Something which brings catastrophic damage to a marriage. 00:18:48.000 --> 00:18:50.000 To the one flesh union. 00:18:50.000 --> 00:18:57.000 You see, marriage at its heart is a sexual union. 00:18:57.000 --> 00:19:03.000 And you cannot set fire to that without in some way tearing at the very heart of marriage. 00:19:04.000 --> 00:19:09.000 For nothing will arouse such intense anger and pain and jealousy as sexual unfaithfulness. 00:19:12.000 --> 00:19:19.000 And where there seems to be a profound damaging or severing of that one flesh union, divorce is permitted. 00:19:19.000 --> 00:19:26.000 So I think that this means that Matthew 19 is addressing a particular debate in that day. 00:19:26.000 --> 00:19:33.000 When he says here that the only ground for divorce is sexual immorality. 00:19:34.000 --> 00:19:40.000 He does not mean in my view that that is the only ground for divorce kind of period, full stop. 00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:41.000 The end. 00:19:41.000 --> 00:19:42.000 The end. 00:19:42.000 --> 00:19:43.000 You know what he means? 00:19:43.000 --> 00:19:50.000 In this debate, over the meaning of the phrase, any cause some indecency, in that particular war of words, 00:19:51.000 --> 00:19:55.000 Jesus is on the side of those who say, indecency means sexual indecency. 00:19:55.000 --> 00:20:01.000 This cannot mean that it's the only ground for divorce because principle number four. 00:20:02.000 --> 00:20:07.000 Divorce is permitted but not compulsory for desertion. 00:20:08.000 --> 00:20:09.000 For desertion. 00:20:09.000 --> 00:20:11.000 So again, come with me. 00:20:11.000 --> 00:20:13.000 Stick with me to 1 Corinthians chapter 7. 00:20:15.000 --> 00:20:17.000 Which is on page 9, 5, 5. 00:20:17.000 --> 00:20:18.000 1 Corinthians chapter 7. 00:20:22.000 --> 00:20:23.000 Ok, 1 Corinthians chapter 7. 00:20:24.000 --> 00:20:25.000 I'm going to read you from verse 12. 00:20:26.000 --> 00:20:26.000 00:20:26.000 --> 00:20:26.000 00:20:26.000 --> 00:20:28.000 On page 9, 5, 5. 00:20:28.000 --> 00:20:29.000 He says. 00:20:29.000 --> 00:20:43.000 To the rest I say, I not the Lord, that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. 00:20:43.000 --> 00:20:48.000 If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. 00:20:48.000 --> 00:20:50.119 him. For the unbelieving 00:20:50.119 --> 00:20:52.200 husband is made holy because of his wife 00:20:52.200 --> 00:20:53.960 and the unbelieving wife 00:20:53.960 --> 00:20:55.859 is made holy because of her husband. 00:20:57.019 --> 00:20:57.880 Otherwise your children 00:20:57.880 --> 00:21:00.119 would be unclean, but as it is they are holy. 00:21:00.980 --> 00:21:02.200 But if the unbelieving 00:21:02.200 --> 00:21:04.180 partner separates, let it be so. 00:21:04.279 --> 00:21:06.039 In such cases the brother or sister is not 00:21:06.039 --> 00:21:06.539 enslaved. 00:21:08.039 --> 00:21:09.019 God has called you in peace. 00:21:10.200 --> 00:21:11.980 For how do you know wife whether you will save your 00:21:11.980 --> 00:21:14.039 husband? Or how do you know husband whether you will save your 00:21:14.039 --> 00:21:14.299 wife? 00:21:15.599 --> 00:21:17.579 So here are the Christians in the church in Corinth. 00:21:19.000 --> 00:21:20.420 And they're asking, what does my 00:21:20.420 --> 00:21:21.960 new love for the Lord Jesus 00:21:21.960 --> 00:21:24.339 mean for my old love 00:21:24.339 --> 00:21:24.960 for my husband? 00:21:26.299 --> 00:21:27.220 Or my wife? 00:21:29.400 --> 00:21:30.200 This person 00:21:30.200 --> 00:21:32.359 who has not followed me in my 00:21:32.359 --> 00:21:33.400 devotion to the Lord Jesus. 00:21:34.059 --> 00:21:35.319 What does it mean for our marriage? 00:21:36.220 --> 00:21:38.380 It's so important to see the principle. Trusting in 00:21:38.380 --> 00:21:40.519 Jesus does not 00:21:40.519 --> 00:21:42.339 mean that you're airlifted out of your 00:21:42.339 --> 00:21:44.400 situation, out of the world, 00:21:44.480 --> 00:21:45.980 out of your network of relationships. 00:21:45.980 --> 00:21:46.180 Jesus. 00:21:46.779 --> 00:21:48.779 One flesh means one flesh. 00:21:50.200 --> 00:21:51.360 Means one flesh. 00:21:52.180 --> 00:21:53.299 One flesh for life. 00:21:54.640 --> 00:21:55.620 So stay as you are. 00:21:57.640 --> 00:21:59.720 And Paul knows that not every 00:21:59.720 --> 00:22:01.599 unbelieving spouse 00:22:01.599 --> 00:22:02.360 likes their 00:22:02.360 --> 00:22:04.200 partner's new love for the Lord Jesus. 00:22:04.200 --> 00:22:08.420 Jesus in the home 00:22:08.420 --> 00:22:12.559 can make the other partner want to leave that home. 00:22:14.519 --> 00:22:17.160 And if that happens, if there's a desertion, 00:22:18.160 --> 00:22:22.160 then the person who has been deserted is not bound in any way. 00:22:22.160 --> 00:22:25.000 There have been two 00:22:25.000 --> 00:22:27.060 traditional grounds 00:22:27.060 --> 00:22:28.220 for divorce in 00:22:28.220 --> 00:22:30.360 Protestant theology, very Protestant church. 00:22:31.540 --> 00:22:33.240 Sexual immorality and desertion. 00:22:33.320 --> 00:22:34.000 I'll give you them both. 00:22:35.580 --> 00:22:36.540 In both 00:22:36.540 --> 00:22:39.080 cases, the marriage 00:22:39.080 --> 00:22:40.180 covenant is broken. 00:22:41.259 --> 00:22:41.680 Seven. 00:22:42.820 --> 00:22:44.640 One because a sexual 00:22:44.640 --> 00:22:47.100 intimacy takes place 00:22:47.100 --> 00:22:48.300 with someone else. 00:22:48.299 --> 00:22:49.980 and the other because the other 00:22:49.980 --> 00:22:50.879 part he does isn't there. 00:22:50.980 --> 00:22:51.399 They've left. 00:22:53.559 --> 00:22:54.200 But I do 00:22:54.200 --> 00:22:55.180 want to argue quite strongly 00:22:55.180 --> 00:22:56.399 that there is another ground 00:22:56.399 --> 00:22:59.000 which has been 00:22:59.000 --> 00:22:59.759 strangely 00:22:59.759 --> 00:23:01.859 neglected by the church. 00:23:03.359 --> 00:23:03.500 And so 00:23:03.500 --> 00:23:04.519 can you come with me to Exodus, 00:23:04.680 --> 00:23:05.659 the second book of the Bible. 00:23:06.799 --> 00:23:07.879 And I've not got a page number 00:23:07.879 --> 00:23:08.319 for this. 00:23:08.440 --> 00:23:09.319 Exodus 21. 00:23:12.319 --> 00:23:13.399 Exodus 21. 00:23:14.399 --> 00:23:15.220 Just after the 00:23:15.220 --> 00:23:15.940 Ten Commandments. 00:23:15.940 --> 00:23:18.039 It's the last passage 00:23:18.039 --> 00:23:19.420 we're going to turn to this morning. 00:23:20.920 --> 00:23:22.039 Exodus 21 00:23:22.039 --> 00:23:23.340 verses 9 and 10. 00:23:32.940 --> 00:23:33.600 And so 00:23:33.600 --> 00:23:35.100 the fifth point is this. 00:23:35.320 --> 00:23:36.259 Divorce is permitted 00:23:36.259 --> 00:23:37.980 but not compulsory 00:23:37.980 --> 00:23:41.080 for humiliating neglect and abuse. 00:23:43.539 --> 00:23:44.460 Divorce is permitted 00:23:44.460 --> 00:23:45.660 but not compulsory 00:23:45.660 --> 00:23:46.960 for humiliating neglect 00:23:46.960 --> 00:23:47.720 and abuse. 00:23:48.880 --> 00:23:49.720 Let me read you from 00:23:49.720 --> 00:23:50.900 Exodus 21 00:23:50.900 --> 00:23:51.980 verses 9 and 10. 00:23:56.460 --> 00:23:57.559 If he designates 00:23:57.559 --> 00:23:58.299 for his son 00:23:58.299 --> 00:23:59.579 he shall deal with her 00:23:59.579 --> 00:24:00.420 as with a daughter. 00:24:01.680 --> 00:24:02.140 Here it is. 00:24:02.200 --> 00:24:02.900 If he takes 00:24:02.900 --> 00:24:04.279 another wife to himself 00:24:04.279 --> 00:24:05.940 he shall not 00:24:05.940 --> 00:24:06.779 diminish her 00:24:06.779 --> 00:24:07.519 food 00:24:07.519 --> 00:24:08.600 her clothing 00:24:08.600 --> 00:24:11.799 or her marital rights. 00:24:11.799 --> 00:24:14.980 The context here 00:24:14.980 --> 00:24:15.960 is slave marriages. 00:24:17.259 --> 00:24:17.940 But of course 00:24:17.940 --> 00:24:18.460 those marriages 00:24:18.460 --> 00:24:19.299 are still marriages. 00:24:21.419 --> 00:24:22.099 And it is clear 00:24:22.099 --> 00:24:22.419 isn't it 00:24:22.419 --> 00:24:23.119 that something 00:24:23.119 --> 00:24:24.839 short of adultery 00:24:24.839 --> 00:24:26.240 or sexual immorality 00:24:26.240 --> 00:24:26.980 is given 00:24:26.980 --> 00:24:27.919 as permissible 00:24:27.919 --> 00:24:29.159 ground for divorce. 00:24:31.659 --> 00:24:32.680 For some reason 00:24:32.680 --> 00:24:33.339 the debate 00:24:33.339 --> 00:24:34.180 about the meaning 00:24:34.180 --> 00:24:34.799 of Deuteronomy 24 00:24:35.359 --> 00:24:36.579 and that any 00:24:36.579 --> 00:24:37.500 cause language 00:24:37.500 --> 00:24:38.299 has dominated 00:24:38.299 --> 00:24:38.839 the church's 00:24:38.839 --> 00:24:39.399 understanding 00:24:39.399 --> 00:24:40.480 of divorce. 00:24:42.099 --> 00:24:42.659 But in fact 00:24:42.659 --> 00:24:43.579 it is most likely 00:24:43.579 --> 00:24:44.220 that rabbis 00:24:44.220 --> 00:24:44.939 in the Old Testament 00:24:44.939 --> 00:24:45.740 and at the time 00:24:45.740 --> 00:24:46.119 of Jesus 00:24:46.119 --> 00:24:47.059 took it for granted 00:24:47.059 --> 00:24:47.899 that to refuse 00:24:47.899 --> 00:24:48.619 food 00:24:48.619 --> 00:24:50.720 and clothing 00:24:50.720 --> 00:24:53.480 and sexual rights 00:24:53.480 --> 00:24:54.359 to a wife 00:24:54.359 --> 00:24:55.519 to your marriage 00:24:55.519 --> 00:24:56.159 partner 00:24:56.159 --> 00:24:57.579 constituted a form 00:24:57.579 --> 00:24:58.699 of humiliating abuse 00:24:58.699 --> 00:25:00.099 of that partner 00:25:00.099 --> 00:25:01.679 which she 00:25:01.679 --> 00:25:02.480 should not have 00:25:02.480 --> 00:25:02.899 to endure 00:25:02.899 --> 00:25:03.459 for life. 00:25:05.619 --> 00:25:05.980 In fact 00:25:05.980 --> 00:25:06.460 the ideas 00:25:06.460 --> 00:25:07.519 of Exodus 21 00:25:07.519 --> 00:25:08.920 have made it 00:25:08.920 --> 00:25:09.539 into our marriage 00:25:09.539 --> 00:25:09.740 though 00:25:09.740 --> 00:25:10.099 haven't they? 00:25:11.200 --> 00:25:11.799 We know that 00:25:11.799 --> 00:25:12.400 on a wedding day 00:25:12.400 --> 00:25:13.200 a husband promises 00:25:13.200 --> 00:25:13.700 to his wife 00:25:13.700 --> 00:25:14.680 to forsake all others 00:25:14.680 --> 00:25:15.360 and hurt him 00:25:15.360 --> 00:25:16.480 there's a sexual 00:25:16.480 --> 00:25:17.519 immorality to him. 00:25:18.279 --> 00:25:18.740 And what else 00:25:18.740 --> 00:25:19.240 does he promise? 00:25:19.339 --> 00:25:19.700 He promises 00:25:19.700 --> 00:25:20.640 will you take this woman 00:25:20.640 --> 00:25:21.299 to be your wife? 00:25:21.400 --> 00:25:22.079 Will you love her? 00:25:22.180 --> 00:25:22.640 Comfort her? 00:25:22.720 --> 00:25:23.120 Honour her? 00:25:23.200 --> 00:25:23.839 And protect her? 00:25:24.279 --> 00:25:25.640 It's a beautiful rendering 00:25:25.640 --> 00:25:26.279 of the ideas 00:25:26.279 --> 00:25:27.140 of Exodus 21. 00:25:29.019 --> 00:25:29.420 Adultery 00:25:29.420 --> 00:25:30.620 can end a marriage 00:25:30.620 --> 00:25:31.160 yes. 00:25:32.860 --> 00:25:33.259 Desertion 00:25:33.259 --> 00:25:34.039 can end 00:25:34.039 --> 00:25:34.720 a marriage 00:25:34.720 --> 00:25:35.380 yes. 00:25:35.380 --> 00:25:36.360 but one of the 00:25:36.360 --> 00:25:36.940 most cruel 00:25:36.940 --> 00:25:37.660 forms of 00:25:37.660 --> 00:25:39.120 desertion 00:25:39.120 --> 00:25:39.620 can be 00:25:39.620 --> 00:25:40.100 the one 00:25:40.100 --> 00:25:40.460 that takes 00:25:40.460 --> 00:25:41.180 place emotionally 00:25:41.180 --> 00:25:44.060 or psychologically 00:25:44.060 --> 00:25:44.700 or physically 00:25:44.700 --> 00:25:47.240 even while 00:25:47.240 --> 00:25:47.860 the abuser 00:25:47.860 --> 00:25:48.620 is standing 00:25:48.620 --> 00:25:49.320 there right 00:25:49.320 --> 00:25:50.260 next to you 00:25:50.260 --> 00:25:53.140 present 00:25:53.140 --> 00:25:54.400 to a spouse 00:25:54.400 --> 00:25:55.980 but present 00:25:55.980 --> 00:25:56.760 only to harm 00:25:56.760 --> 00:25:59.200 and that too 00:25:59.200 --> 00:25:59.780 in my view 00:25:59.780 --> 00:26:00.540 the humiliation 00:26:00.540 --> 00:26:01.500 of neglect 00:26:01.500 --> 00:26:02.260 and abuse 00:26:02.260 --> 00:26:03.320 means divorce 00:26:03.320 --> 00:26:04.100 may be permitted 00:26:04.099 --> 00:26:06.819 and we need 00:26:06.819 --> 00:26:07.240 to be clear 00:26:07.240 --> 00:26:07.579 about this 00:26:07.579 --> 00:26:07.959 don't we 00:26:07.959 --> 00:26:09.259 crystal clear 00:26:09.259 --> 00:26:11.319 that the sanctity 00:26:11.319 --> 00:26:12.359 of marriage 00:26:12.359 --> 00:26:15.079 the oneness 00:26:15.079 --> 00:26:15.980 of a marriage 00:26:15.980 --> 00:26:16.939 is never 00:26:16.939 --> 00:26:17.759 a sanctuary 00:26:17.759 --> 00:26:19.159 for a man 00:26:19.159 --> 00:26:19.879 or a woman 00:26:19.879 --> 00:26:21.000 in wreaking 00:26:21.000 --> 00:26:21.819 devastating 00:26:21.819 --> 00:26:22.439 physical 00:26:22.439 --> 00:26:23.279 or emotional 00:26:23.279 --> 00:26:24.519 or psychological 00:26:24.519 --> 00:26:25.159 abuse 00:26:25.159 --> 00:26:25.839 on their spouse 00:26:25.839 --> 00:26:29.220 the Bible 00:26:29.220 --> 00:26:29.899 does not 00:26:29.899 --> 00:26:31.039 it does not 00:26:31.039 --> 00:26:31.799 provide 00:26:31.799 --> 00:26:33.099 warrant for 00:26:33.099 --> 00:26:34.079 domestic abuse 00:26:34.079 --> 00:26:34.779 or violence 00:26:34.779 --> 00:26:35.439 in any form 00:26:35.439 --> 00:26:35.939 does it 00:26:35.939 --> 00:26:39.099 particularly in churches 00:26:39.099 --> 00:26:39.539 we have the 00:26:39.539 --> 00:26:40.659 incredible privilege 00:26:40.659 --> 00:26:41.699 of living with 00:26:41.699 --> 00:26:42.720 an extended family 00:26:42.720 --> 00:26:44.779 sometimes 00:26:44.779 --> 00:26:45.839 that family 00:26:45.839 --> 00:26:46.819 needs to provide 00:26:46.819 --> 00:26:47.599 a world of 00:26:47.599 --> 00:26:48.459 shelter and love 00:26:48.459 --> 00:26:50.079 for men 00:26:50.079 --> 00:26:50.699 and for women 00:26:50.699 --> 00:26:51.519 while people 00:26:51.519 --> 00:26:52.559 try to get involved 00:26:52.559 --> 00:26:53.519 and bring about 00:26:53.519 --> 00:26:54.220 the right kind 00:26:54.220 --> 00:26:54.879 of end 00:26:54.879 --> 00:26:56.899 to devastating 00:26:56.899 --> 00:26:57.319 happening 00:26:57.319 --> 00:26:58.819 devastating damage 00:26:58.819 --> 00:26:59.259 that happens 00:26:59.259 --> 00:26:59.819 in marriage 00:26:59.819 --> 00:27:02.859 the sixth point 00:27:02.859 --> 00:27:03.579 and the last point 00:27:03.579 --> 00:27:04.240 is this 00:27:04.240 --> 00:27:06.299 divorce 00:27:06.299 --> 00:27:07.319 is not the end 00:27:07.319 --> 00:27:07.960 of the story 00:27:07.960 --> 00:27:10.700 divorce 00:27:10.700 --> 00:27:11.500 is not the end 00:27:11.500 --> 00:27:12.079 of the story 00:27:12.079 --> 00:27:14.379 it's not the final 00:27:14.379 --> 00:27:14.819 chapter 00:27:14.819 --> 00:27:15.700 of anyone's story 00:27:15.700 --> 00:27:19.179 did you notice 00:27:19.179 --> 00:27:20.220 the other correction 00:27:20.220 --> 00:27:21.339 that Jesus makes 00:27:21.339 --> 00:27:22.159 to the Pharisees 00:27:22.159 --> 00:27:23.379 in Matthew chapter 19 00:27:23.379 --> 00:27:27.119 and they look to him 00:27:27.119 --> 00:27:27.519 and they say 00:27:27.519 --> 00:27:28.179 oh yeah yeah 00:27:28.179 --> 00:27:28.819 Jesus 00:27:28.819 --> 00:27:29.419 and we know 00:27:29.419 --> 00:27:30.119 about the one flesh 00:27:30.119 --> 00:27:30.819 that you need 00:27:30.819 --> 00:27:31.439 to be in the Bible 00:27:31.439 --> 00:27:32.199 but why then 00:27:32.199 --> 00:27:32.659 did Moses 00:27:32.659 --> 00:27:33.359 give a certificate 00:27:33.359 --> 00:27:33.899 of divorce 00:27:33.899 --> 00:27:35.439 why did he allow it 00:27:35.439 --> 00:27:37.980 see what Jesus does 00:27:37.980 --> 00:27:39.859 Matthew 19 00:27:39.859 --> 00:27:40.639 in verse 8 00:27:40.639 --> 00:27:43.419 he said to them 00:27:43.419 --> 00:27:44.179 because of your 00:27:44.179 --> 00:27:44.859 hardness 00:27:44.859 --> 00:27:45.939 of heart 00:27:45.939 --> 00:27:48.639 Moses allowed you 00:27:48.639 --> 00:27:49.819 to divorce your wives 00:27:49.819 --> 00:27:51.039 but from the beginning 00:27:51.039 --> 00:27:53.539 it was not so 00:27:53.539 --> 00:27:55.119 correct gentlemen 00:27:55.119 --> 00:27:55.559 Moses 00:27:55.559 --> 00:27:57.259 commanded 00:27:57.259 --> 00:27:59.319 no 00:27:59.319 --> 00:28:01.920 Moses didn't command 00:28:01.920 --> 00:28:04.539 Moses commanded 00:28:04.539 --> 00:28:05.359 no such thing 00:28:05.359 --> 00:28:05.740 did he 00:28:05.740 --> 00:28:07.599 do you see the difference 00:28:07.599 --> 00:28:10.159 Moses allowed it 00:28:10.159 --> 00:28:12.480 Jesus says 00:28:12.480 --> 00:28:13.460 Moses permitted it 00:28:13.460 --> 00:28:14.019 because of the 00:28:14.019 --> 00:28:15.000 hardness of heart 00:28:15.000 --> 00:28:16.659 divorce is permitted 00:28:16.659 --> 00:28:18.119 but not commanded 00:28:18.119 --> 00:28:20.899 it's not compulsory 00:28:20.899 --> 00:28:23.779 sometimes sin 00:28:23.779 --> 00:28:26.219 spreads its tentacles 00:28:26.219 --> 00:28:27.859 around our hearts 00:28:27.859 --> 00:28:28.439 and it weaves 00:28:28.439 --> 00:28:29.719 such strong cords 00:28:29.719 --> 00:28:30.459 that we can never 00:28:30.459 --> 00:28:31.419 seem to break it 00:28:31.419 --> 00:28:34.299 sometimes the fallenness 00:28:34.299 --> 00:28:35.179 of our world 00:28:35.179 --> 00:28:36.059 and our relationship 00:28:36.059 --> 00:28:37.259 spreads its reach 00:28:37.259 --> 00:28:38.419 so far 00:28:38.419 --> 00:28:39.019 that some 00:28:39.019 --> 00:28:39.939 marriage unions 00:28:39.939 --> 00:28:40.619 just become 00:28:40.619 --> 00:28:41.739 irretrievably broken 00:28:41.740 --> 00:28:43.960 and divorce 00:28:43.960 --> 00:28:44.599 is permitted 00:28:44.599 --> 00:28:45.420 for immorality 00:28:45.420 --> 00:28:46.299 and for desertion 00:28:46.299 --> 00:28:46.720 and abuse 00:28:46.720 --> 00:28:47.200 but it's not 00:28:47.200 --> 00:28:47.759 commanded for 00:28:47.759 --> 00:28:48.180 any of those 00:28:48.180 --> 00:28:48.579 things 00:28:48.579 --> 00:28:50.079 does that 00:28:50.079 --> 00:28:50.660 surprise you 00:28:50.660 --> 00:28:51.319 I think it 00:28:51.319 --> 00:28:51.579 should 00:28:51.579 --> 00:28:55.720 when we see 00:28:55.720 --> 00:28:56.680 people suffer 00:28:56.680 --> 00:28:57.420 in marriage 00:28:57.420 --> 00:28:58.859 yet no divorce 00:28:58.859 --> 00:28:59.759 is not 00:28:59.759 --> 00:29:00.319 commanded 00:29:00.319 --> 00:29:03.680 forgiveness 00:29:03.680 --> 00:29:04.720 might yet 00:29:04.720 --> 00:29:05.279 win through 00:29:05.279 --> 00:29:08.839 God is not 00:29:08.839 --> 00:29:09.299 just 00:29:09.299 --> 00:29:10.879 a divorcee 00:29:10.879 --> 00:29:13.139 he remarries 00:29:13.139 --> 00:29:16.000 he calls 00:29:16.000 --> 00:29:16.579 back his 00:29:16.579 --> 00:29:17.420 exiled people 00:29:17.420 --> 00:29:18.099 from Babylon 00:29:18.099 --> 00:29:20.700 he sets 00:29:20.700 --> 00:29:21.220 his love 00:29:21.220 --> 00:29:21.680 upon the 00:29:21.680 --> 00:29:22.019 people who 00:29:22.019 --> 00:29:22.519 trampled 00:29:22.519 --> 00:29:23.339 on his love 00:29:23.339 --> 00:29:24.299 and trashed 00:29:24.299 --> 00:29:24.899 his garden 00:29:24.899 --> 00:29:26.039 and vandalised 00:29:26.039 --> 00:29:26.599 his house 00:29:26.599 --> 00:29:27.599 and spurned 00:29:27.599 --> 00:29:27.960 his love 00:29:27.960 --> 00:29:28.579 and he calls 00:29:28.579 --> 00:29:29.160 them back 00:29:29.160 --> 00:29:30.279 and he marries 00:29:30.279 --> 00:29:30.980 the prostitute 00:29:30.980 --> 00:29:31.460 girl 00:29:31.460 --> 00:29:33.700 and so it 00:29:33.700 --> 00:29:34.180 is with us 00:29:34.180 --> 00:29:36.960 divorce is 00:29:36.960 --> 00:29:37.360 permitted 00:29:37.360 --> 00:29:40.620 but the 00:29:40.620 --> 00:29:41.200 deeply 00:29:41.200 --> 00:29:42.000 broken 00:29:42.000 --> 00:29:43.060 spurned 00:29:43.060 --> 00:29:43.519 lover 00:29:43.519 --> 00:29:45.380 may with 00:29:45.380 --> 00:29:46.180 God's grace 00:29:46.180 --> 00:29:46.799 forgive 00:29:46.799 --> 00:29:48.440 if the 00:29:48.440 --> 00:29:48.799 deserter 00:29:48.799 --> 00:29:49.299 will return 00:29:49.299 --> 00:29:52.220 and the 00:29:52.220 --> 00:29:52.600 wonder of 00:29:52.600 --> 00:29:52.920 wonders 00:29:52.920 --> 00:29:53.259 is that 00:29:53.259 --> 00:29:53.480 through 00:29:53.480 --> 00:29:54.019 gospel 00:29:54.019 --> 00:29:54.480 grace 00:29:54.480 --> 00:29:54.740 the 00:29:54.740 --> 00:29:55.120 deserter 00:29:55.120 --> 00:29:55.360 may 00:29:55.360 --> 00:29:55.820 return 00:29:55.820 --> 00:29:56.340 in tears 00:29:56.340 --> 00:29:58.279 and shame 00:29:58.279 --> 00:30:00.019 and repentance 00:30:00.019 --> 00:30:00.920 to find bread 00:30:00.920 --> 00:30:01.340 and wine 00:30:01.340 --> 00:30:01.960 on the table 00:30:01.960 --> 00:30:03.700 and the 00:30:03.700 --> 00:30:04.220 best robe 00:30:04.220 --> 00:30:04.500 on her 00:30:04.500 --> 00:30:05.059 shoulders 00:30:05.059 --> 00:30:05.980 and a 00:30:05.980 --> 00:30:06.220 ring on 00:30:06.220 --> 00:30:06.900 her hand 00:30:06.900 --> 00:30:08.420 and a 00:30:08.420 --> 00:30:08.720 fatten 00:30:08.720 --> 00:30:09.019 calf 00:30:09.019 --> 00:30:09.299 coat 00:30:09.299 --> 00:30:11.759 is that 00:30:11.759 --> 00:30:12.140 possible 00:30:12.140 --> 00:30:15.720 or is 00:30:15.720 --> 00:30:16.000 the good 00:30:16.000 --> 00:30:16.480 news of the 00:30:16.480 --> 00:30:16.900 Lord Jesus 00:30:16.900 --> 00:30:17.279 too weak 00:30:17.279 --> 00:30:17.539 to do 00:30:17.539 --> 00:30:17.759 that 00:30:17.759 --> 00:30:21.120 the abuser 00:30:21.120 --> 00:30:21.759 may repent 00:30:21.759 --> 00:30:24.100 and there 00:30:24.100 --> 00:30:24.360 may be 00:30:24.360 --> 00:30:24.840 healing for 00:30:24.840 --> 00:30:25.140 what they 00:30:25.140 --> 00:30:25.380 did 00:30:25.380 --> 00:30:28.200 Saul 00:30:28.200 --> 00:30:28.500 do you 00:30:28.500 --> 00:30:28.880 remember him 00:30:28.880 --> 00:30:29.460 he held 00:30:29.460 --> 00:30:30.100 the coats 00:30:30.100 --> 00:30:31.460 of men 00:30:31.460 --> 00:30:32.840 who murdered 00:30:32.840 --> 00:30:33.440 Christians 00:30:33.440 --> 00:30:33.920 and he 00:30:33.920 --> 00:30:34.380 approved of 00:30:34.380 --> 00:30:34.860 it 00:30:34.860 --> 00:30:39.660 but he 00:30:39.660 --> 00:30:39.800 was 00:30:39.800 --> 00:30:40.100 wonderfully 00:30:40.100 --> 00:30:40.760 transformed 00:30:40.760 --> 00:30:42.840 Jesus 00:30:42.840 --> 00:30:43.520 always 00:30:43.520 --> 00:30:43.980 always 00:30:43.980 --> 00:30:44.620 always 00:30:44.620 --> 00:30:44.920 brings 00:30:44.920 --> 00:30:45.440 the promise 00:30:45.440 --> 00:30:45.900 of gospel 00:30:45.900 --> 00:30:46.600 transformation 00:30:46.600 --> 00:30:49.220 some people 00:30:49.220 --> 00:30:50.040 head towards 00:30:50.040 --> 00:30:50.500 divorce 00:30:50.500 --> 00:30:50.840 and the 00:30:50.840 --> 00:30:51.360 gospel can 00:30:51.360 --> 00:30:52.340 stop it 00:30:52.340 --> 00:30:55.080 divorce is 00:30:55.080 --> 00:30:55.740 the solution 00:30:55.740 --> 00:30:56.480 only when 00:30:56.480 --> 00:30:57.100 all else 00:30:57.100 --> 00:30:57.600 fails 00:30:57.599 --> 00:31:01.359 and we 00:31:01.359 --> 00:31:01.639 need to 00:31:01.639 --> 00:31:01.980 say that 00:31:01.980 --> 00:31:02.419 it's just 00:31:02.419 --> 00:31:02.799 as true 00:31:02.799 --> 00:31:03.339 where divorce 00:31:03.339 --> 00:31:04.319 has happened 00:31:04.319 --> 00:31:06.959 where divorce 00:31:06.959 --> 00:31:07.419 had to 00:31:07.419 --> 00:31:07.799 happen 00:31:07.799 --> 00:31:10.059 it's just 00:31:10.059 --> 00:31:10.359 as true 00:31:10.359 --> 00:31:10.779 whether a 00:31:10.779 --> 00:31:11.099 sinful 00:31:11.099 --> 00:31:11.480 divorce 00:31:11.480 --> 00:31:12.059 took place 00:31:12.059 --> 00:31:12.379 or a 00:31:12.379 --> 00:31:12.679 divorce 00:31:12.679 --> 00:31:13.179 caused 00:31:13.179 --> 00:31:13.819 by sin 00:31:13.819 --> 00:31:14.500 but which 00:31:14.500 --> 00:31:14.879 was not 00:31:14.879 --> 00:31:15.379 in itself 00:31:15.379 --> 00:31:15.899 sinful 00:31:15.899 --> 00:31:17.859 in none 00:31:17.859 --> 00:31:18.259 of those 00:31:18.259 --> 00:31:18.719 cases 00:31:18.719 --> 00:31:19.439 none of 00:31:19.439 --> 00:31:19.980 those cases 00:31:19.980 --> 00:31:20.480 does God 00:31:20.480 --> 00:31:21.079 ever pull 00:31:21.079 --> 00:31:21.459 down the 00:31:21.459 --> 00:31:21.759 curtain 00:31:21.759 --> 00:31:23.159 and say 00:31:23.159 --> 00:31:23.539 well that's 00:31:23.539 --> 00:31:23.959 the final 00:31:23.959 --> 00:31:24.219 act 00:31:24.219 --> 00:31:24.619 that's the 00:31:24.619 --> 00:31:25.219 story over 00:31:25.219 --> 00:31:26.019 divorce is 00:31:26.019 --> 00:31:26.619 not the 00:31:26.619 --> 00:31:27.240 unforgivable 00:31:27.240 --> 00:31:27.700 sin 00:31:27.700 --> 00:31:29.779 it's not 00:31:29.779 --> 00:31:30.140 the end 00:31:30.140 --> 00:31:30.440 of you 00:31:30.440 --> 00:31:33.819 and the 00:31:33.819 --> 00:31:34.259 pain of 00:31:34.259 --> 00:31:34.900 divorce can 00:31:34.900 --> 00:31:35.339 be healed 00:31:35.339 --> 00:31:35.599 with the 00:31:35.599 --> 00:31:36.079 gospel of 00:31:36.079 --> 00:31:36.380 grace 00:31:36.380 --> 00:31:39.980 now what 00:31:39.980 --> 00:31:40.460 is the 00:31:40.460 --> 00:31:41.059 only thing 00:31:41.059 --> 00:31:41.599 that marks 00:31:41.599 --> 00:31:42.059 the end 00:31:42.059 --> 00:31:42.359 of the 00:31:42.359 --> 00:31:42.819 road 00:31:42.819 --> 00:31:43.759 for someone's 00:31:43.759 --> 00:31:44.240 walk with 00:31:44.240 --> 00:31:44.539 Jesus 00:31:44.539 --> 00:31:47.720 the only 00:31:47.720 --> 00:31:48.220 thing that 00:31:48.220 --> 00:31:48.900 marks the 00:31:48.900 --> 00:31:49.480 end of the 00:31:49.480 --> 00:31:50.059 road 00:31:50.059 --> 00:31:50.740 for someone's 00:31:50.740 --> 00:31:51.120 walk with 00:31:51.120 --> 00:31:51.420 Jesus 00:31:51.420 --> 00:31:52.299 is hardness 00:31:52.299 --> 00:31:53.099 of heart 00:31:53.099 --> 00:31:55.959 and may 00:31:55.959 --> 00:31:56.519 God give 00:31:56.519 --> 00:31:56.980 us as a 00:31:56.980 --> 00:31:57.579 church family 00:31:57.579 --> 00:31:59.259 in his 00:31:59.259 --> 00:31:59.679 kindness 00:31:59.679 --> 00:32:00.779 cause to 00:32:00.779 --> 00:32:01.679 cherish his 00:32:01.679 --> 00:32:02.619 original intention 00:32:02.619 --> 00:32:03.279 for marriage 00:32:03.279 --> 00:32:05.639 our refusal 00:32:05.639 --> 00:32:06.639 to stigmatise 00:32:06.639 --> 00:32:07.359 anyone 00:32:07.359 --> 00:32:09.659 a profound 00:32:09.659 --> 00:32:10.579 compassion for 00:32:10.579 --> 00:32:11.159 others in this 00:32:11.159 --> 00:32:11.740 broken world 00:32:11.740 --> 00:32:12.159 in which we 00:32:12.159 --> 00:32:12.439 live 00:32:12.439 --> 00:32:14.939 repentance for 00:32:14.939 --> 00:32:15.459 our sin 00:32:15.459 --> 00:32:18.299 protection for 00:32:18.299 --> 00:32:18.679 the weak 00:32:18.680 --> 00:32:21.460 faithfulness to 00:32:21.460 --> 00:32:22.299 those we 00:32:22.299 --> 00:32:22.720 are bound 00:32:22.720 --> 00:32:23.460 to today 00:32:23.460 --> 00:32:25.440 and love 00:32:25.440 --> 00:32:26.519 for Christ 00:32:26.519 --> 00:32:26.960 and his 00:32:26.960 --> 00:32:27.480 word 00:32:27.480 --> 00:32:29.279 in first 00:32:29.279 --> 00:32:29.700 place in 00:32:29.700 --> 00:32:30.240 our hearts 00:32:30.240 --> 00:32:31.080 all our 00:32:31.080 --> 00:32:31.440 days 00:32:31.440 --> 00:32:33.279 amen