I was actually thinking of the concept of planting versus established.
Me and trees have this kind of battle we've been doing for the last three years of like,
I am going to plant trees that live, and then they say, no, we will die.
And I have this pine tree that I planted at the beginning of the year.
I planted four of them.
One of them, it's planted, right?
It's planted.
But it is not established.
And I feel like it's dying from the bottom up.
So just the very top has got this green part, and then all the rest is brown.
And I don't think that one's going to make it.
But you can plant something without it being established.
And so this church is planted, but is it established?
Not quite yet.
We're working on that, right?
And we're all doing our part.
So I want to speak into that a little bit today.
And the message that I want to preach today is becoming relationship poor so that others can become relationship rich.
Okay?
Becoming relationship poor so others can become relationship rich.
Now, in this church plant, we got this group of people together that the Lord put together.
And we are building relationships and trying to get to know one another and build family together.
Some of those are existing stronger relationships.
Some aren't as much.
And you got the mix of both.
And then we have other relationships elsewhere.
And so there's all kinds of dynamics in that.
But some of the relational pressing into one another, sometimes it can be difficult, right?
Sometimes it can start off good.
And then it's like, okay, there's a little bit of wonkiness, right?
As you get into the nitty-gritty of stuff.
And that's, first of all, that's normal, right?
That's...
What relationship doesn't have a little wonkiness at some point in time?
Or a little difficulty at some time?
That is the nature of relationships.
But I think there's ways that we can promote a certain level of unity and oneness and depth.
And then there are ways that we can kind of shoot ourselves in the foot with that.
And so I was having a conversation with a couple a few weeks ago, a month ago.
And we were talking about what is required to build healthy church culture.
And ended up talking about kind of this topic.
I had been reading in 1 Corinthians and 2 Corinthians.
And so some of these themes were...
I was getting language for them.
These are themes that we've been talking about for years.
But I felt like some verses gave me better language for some of them.
So I'm going to jump into that.
Basically, I'm mostly going to be in 2 Corinthians in this whole message.
We'll bounce around a little bit out of that.
But mostly in 2 Corinthians.
But I'm going to actually start in 1 Corinthians.
To give you a little backdrop before we get into 2 Corinthians.
And I'm going to start in 1 Corinthians chapter 12, 21 to 27.
1 Corinthians 12, 21 to 27 is talking about the necessity of all the parts of the body.
And it says, verse 21,
On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable.
On those parts of the body that we think less honorable, we bestow the greater honor.
And our unpresentable parts are treated with greater modesty, which our more presentable parts do not require.
But God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it,
that there may be no division in the body,
but that the members may have the same care for one another.
If one member suffers, all suffer together.
If one member is honored, all rejoice together.
Now you are the body of Christ and individually members of it.
But, okay.
Side note, by the way, I know I told this to some of you,
but just so you know, you guys deciding to go over to Bellicose to support the church,
going through the grieving process with the loss of Caspian Vaughn,
that meant a lot to a lot of people.
So, good move on that one.
Good job.
That was, that blessed.
I heard from a number of people that they were really appreciative
that you guys all came over there and just mourned with them and comforted them.
So, I just love that.
And that's, to me, just an example of when one part suffers, we all suffer, you know.
But he says the members, he says the reason that he's thinking about all this stuff
is so that the members may have the same care for one another.
And he starts that off by saying, hey, the eye can't say to the hand, I have no need of you,
nor the head to the feet, I have no need of you.
And so, in a real direct sense, we would all say, well, no one would ever say that, right?
I would never like literally say, hey, listen, I have no need of you, you know.
We wouldn't say it that outright, but we can actually live in such a way where we
kind of live like that, you know.
We might not say it, like, hey, I have no need of you.
I'm fine on my own.
But we can live in a way that I have these certain people that are my go-tos.
I got my people where these are the people if I need to kind of open up, if I need to
just relax, if I need to just get some quality time or some deep time, or if we're going to
do something impactful together, those are my people.
But I don't really need you for that because I have that with other people.
So especially when you have new missional community starting and a new church starting,
you can give off that impression that, hey, we're doing this because, you know, that's
what we're supposed to do, right?
You know, I'm supposed to be with you.
I'm in your missional community.
I'm with this church.
But, I mean, I don't really need you because I got these people that are my people.
I got these people where I get my life from.
And so I do this with you, but I don't really need you for that.
And what ends up happening is some people don't get the same care.
And his concern here is that the members may have the same care for one another.
Sometimes we're not able to give the right care to other people because we are too focused
on these people where it's become easy.
Your besties, the kind of people you've developed a relationship, you've already pushed through
the wonkiness and the relational hardship.
These are your people.
You just know you can count on them.
You know, yeah, we've had our thing, but that's kind of in the past.
But since we've been there, done that, it's not going to happen anymore.
So those are my people.
And so you, I don't really want to do that again with you.
I've already did that with a group of people.
And that was a lot of work.
So I'm just going to stick with these group of people.
And I'll kind of, I'll hang around you and I'll do the church thing and I'll fulfill
my religious obligation.
But, you know, I'm not going to go, I don't really need you.
And again, you wouldn't say it, but you say it.
Does that make sense?
Not so much?
You with me?
Okay, good.
You have the same kind of thing when he talks about communion, actually.
In 1 Corinthians 11, chapter before, verse 20, he says,
when you come together, it's not the Lord's supper that you eat.
For in eating, each one goes ahead with his own meal.
One goes hungry and another gets drunk.
And then he says in verse 24 with an exclamation point, what?
What?
Do you not have houses to eat and drink in?
Or do you despise the church of God and humiliate those who have nothing?
What shall I say to you?
Shall I commend you in this?
No, I will not.
Skip in verse 29.
He says, for anyone who eats and drinks without discerning the body,
eats and drinks judgment on himself.
And then in verse 33, he says, so then, my brothers, when you come together to eat,
wait for one another.
If anyone's hungry, let them eat at home.
So when you come together, it will not be for judgment.
Essentially, he's saying you can't live church life together in a way that's independent of the body.
You can't just say, well, I'm hungry.
I'm thirsty.
I'm going to eat as much as I want, drink as much as I want.
And then you find out, oh, there's not enough for everybody.
But I don't really care about that.
He's saying, hey, you have to care about that.
And it's one thing to do that with food.
But we could do that relationally, right?
Where you just say, well, I have this relational thing with some people,
but I don't really need it with other people.
And I don't really, I just, I got my thing here going and it's good.
But it's kind of the same thing.
One goes hungry and another gets drunk, right?
One is hungry for relationship.
Another one has plenty of relationship,
but we don't care as much about the people who don't have as close a relationship.
And that can be a problem, right?
Some people might say, even going into this church plant,
they might have said six months ago, I'm good at relationships.
I'm good at all the work that it takes to build that and get close to one another.
I'm good at that.
And my question to you is, are you?
Because if you're only good with some people, then you're not necessarily good at it.
You may have thought maybe that you're good at something because you have it with some people.
But if you're not able to spread that with other people,
you're not as good as you think you are at building relationships.
And some of us, I believe in this church, need to stretch our relational muscles.
Some of us haven't worked out in a while relationally.
We're a little stiff.
We're a little wonky.
And you might say, well, what are you even talking about?
I'm saying, it's like, you're saying we don't do relationships?
I'm saying, no, you do easy relationships maybe.
But what about the ones that are harder?
What about the ones that take more work?
What about the ones you don't have a history with?
What about the ones where you haven't worked through that stuff
and you got to start from scratch with some people that you don't know as well?
Have you worked out the soreness?
Have you worked out the stiffness and said, I'm going to press through that
and get to a place where the relationship is loose in a good sense,
where it's flexible, where it's real?
I think that there's some people who maybe have come into this thinking,
oh, this is going to be easy because I'm good at relationship.
But you can think you're good at relationship
because you have certain people that you're good at it with.
But if you're not good at it with everybody, you're probably not that good at it.
And that's something I want to challenge us with,
to at least just think about.
Ask that question.
How am I with that?
How am I with relationship?
And don't base it on your best friends.
Base it on how it is with the stranger.
Base it on how it is with the person who's new.
Base it on the person who you don't have history with in Christchurch
that you're getting to know.
How are you doing with that?
Is it wonky?
Is it difficult?
And do you give up or do you persevere?
That's the question I want to ask you.
So let's get into our main text though.
2 Corinthians chapter 6 and 2 Corinthians chapter 8.
So we'll start with the verse in 2 Corinthians chapter 6 verse 10.
There's just this little phrase here
that kind of frames what I'm talking about
and then it gets elaborated more in 2 Corinthians chapter 8.
2 Corinthians 6.10 he says,
there's this phrase in there where he says,
we are poor yet making many rich.
We're poor yet making many rich.
Love that phrase.
And then he elaborates on it in 2 Corinthians chapter 8.
If you're in there you can move to chapter 8 verse 1.
2 Corinthians chapter 8 verse 1 says,
We want you to know brothers about the grace of God
that has been given among the churches of Macedonia.
For in a severe test of affliction their abundance of joy
and their extreme poverty have overflowed in a wealth of generosity on their part.
For they gave according to their means,
as I can testify,
and beyond their means of their own accord,
begging us earnestly for the favor of taking part in the relief of the saints.
Okay?
And this not as we expected,
but they gave themselves first to the Lord
and then by the will of God to us.
Accordingly we urge Titus that as he had started,
so he should complete among you this act of grace.
But as you excel in everything,
in faith and speech and knowledge and all earnestness,
and in our love for you,
see that you excel in this act of grace also.
So he's talking about this monetary gift they're giving.
These guys were giving above and beyond their means,
and they didn't have a lot,
and yet they were begging earnestly for the favor of taking part in this relief.
Okay?
So then in verse 8 he says,
I say this not as a command,
to see that you excel in this act of grace also,
I say this not as a command,
but to prove by the earnestness of others
that your love also is genuine.
Then in verse 9 he says,
and this is the key verse here,
For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ,
that though he was rich,
yet for your sake he became poor,
so that you by his poverty might become rich.
Okay?
So he's talking about money there,
but then when he talks about the motive for doing that,
he speaks of how Jesus became poor
so that others could become rich.
And he's not talking about money there.
He's not talking about Jesus had a lot of money,
and then he decided to become poor,
and he gave us a lot of money.
Like, that's not what he's saying there.
He's saying, no, this is bigger.
And the specific of giving money,
he then goes bigger and says,
this is what Jesus modeled in a much bigger way.
That this is a picture of the grace of God.
That though Jesus was rich,
yet for your sake he became poor,
so that you by his poverty might become rich.
Okay?
So,
do you do this to other people?
Do you ever become poor so that others become rich?
And I'm not talking about even monetarily,
although you could.
There are things sometimes that we have
that we give up to make other people have more.
Right?
And that's,
Jesus modeled that better than anybody else.
Okay?
Let's look at this in the context of relationships.
Romans 15 verse 7 says,
welcome one another as Christ has welcomed you
for the glory of God.
Okay?
So, we just got a picture of how Christ has welcomed us.
So, we need to do the same thing.
How has he welcomed us?
Well, he took on poverty
so that other people could take on being rich.
Are we willing to do that?
That involves sacrifice.
To say,
I will sacrifice what I have
if it means that other people could have more.
Right?
James chapter 2, 15 through 17 says,
if a brother or sister is poorly clothed
and lacking in daily food,
and one of you says to them,
go in peace,
be warmed and filled,
without giving them the things needed for the body,
what good is that?
So also by faith,
so also faith by itself,
if it does not have works,
is dead.
Let me reword this
in thinking of it like relationships.
Okay?
If a brother or sister is relationship poor,
lacking in relationship,
and one of you says to them,
go in peace,
I hope you find good relationships.
Without spending and being spent
to give them deep familiar relationships,
what good is that?
So also faith by itself,
if it does not have works,
is dead.
Going to church meetings out of obligation,
with no intention to connect deeply
with the people that are there,
because you already have your people
you do that with,
is one of the greatest ways
to build shallow,
insincere,
off-putting church culture
that no one needs,
no one wants,
no one likes,
and that certainly falls short
of the glory of God.
Okay?
We can't just say,
well,
yeah,
I'm supposed to be a part
of this missional community,
or I'm supposed to relate
to these people,
so I'll do that
out of religious obligation,
but really,
if I really want the goods,
if I really want the deep stuff,
if I really want that relational juices,
you know,
that I,
I'm going to go to this person
who's not in my missional community.
I'm going to go to this person
who's not even a part of our church,
and I'm going to get it from them
because I already know
that one works.
Right?
We've got years together.
We've got history together.
And I know if I need the goods,
I can always go to them
to get the goods.
Well,
if you're always supplementing
with that relationship
outside of your missional community
or outside of your church in general,
what you're doing is
making sure that it never happens
in your missional community
and it never happens in your church.
Do you understand
what I'm saying here?
That's a really important thing.
And so you can end up having
this church culture
where you basically do things
out of religious obligation
because it's like,
well,
I'm supposed to be with these people.
This is my church
or this is even more specifically,
this is my smaller part of the church.
This is my missional community.
And so I'm going to spend time with them
because that's what I'm supposed to do.
But really,
I'm not really in it to win it.
My heart's not there.
My heart's actually with these other people.
And when I really need to get comfort
or I really need to get friendship
or I really want to have fun
or I really want to do mission,
I'll deal with them
because I don't really know these people.
And if everybody does that,
then church really is lame.
And God is not glorified
because it's required
that we connect in that deep way.
and new people coming in,
they need to experience that.
You might say,
well, I already have that.
Well, so what?
What about the person
who doesn't have that?
Are you going to be indifferent to them
and just say,
I'm good?
If everybody did that,
then new people
would never experience
the deeper life
and the relationship
that's necessary.
So people might just say,
well, can I,
because I hear this all the time.
I've heard this for years.
Can't I just build
with the people I'm close to?
Right?
I mean, yeah,
I get this whole
missional community thing.
That's cute, Josh.
You got,
you like your church planning stuff
and you like all your ideas
and that's good for you, Josh.
That's cool.
But I mean,
I don't really get into those people.
Can I just build with,
can we just form
like a super missional community
with like all the people
who are my best friends?
I mean,
we would be awesome.
And guess what?
You probably would be.
But then what about
all those new people?
What about the people
who don't have
the relationships you have?
You just going to selfishly
do your thing
in the name of church
while they don't have that?
You can't do that.
We can't do that.
You know,
it can't just be us four no more.
Okay,
what about the people
who aren't close to anyone?
How do they get close
to other people?
By sacrificing
your best relationships
to give the necessary time,
energy,
and heart
to build with other people,
you basically are becoming
relationship poor
so others can become
relationship rich
just like Jesus.
What I'm saying is
there's an element
of sacrifice
of the relationships
you already have
that's required
to build those
same kind of relationships
with people
you don't yet have.
okay?
Because you usually
can't do both.
There's not enough time
in the day,
weeks,
months.
You only have so much
relational capital
that you can build with
and if it's all in this
these relationships
that are existing
you're not going to be able
to do it with other people
but
not to mention
if you wanted to just
hang out with the same people
then you don't sign up
for a church plant.
You don't start
you don't like
no one put a gun
to your head
no one said
hey you had to be
a part of the church plant
but by being a part
of the church plant
you're literally saying
I'm going to sacrifice
the time spent
with the people
who I already have developed
and I'm going to get
out of my comfort zone
I'm going to become
relationship poor
on purpose
sacrificing existing
relationships
in order that I may
give other people
relationship richness.
I'm going to
sacrifice this
to work towards this
and it's going to cost.
Healthy church
is expensive.
It's expensive
and at the end of the day
some people don't want
to pay the price.
Some people don't want
the price.
It costs though.
I think of
my own experience
in this
you know
over the years
you know
even when we've
just
anytime we've wanted to
we've started
a new missional community
or a new iteration
of a missional community
we had to say
okay
I'm diverting
my attention
to these people
in order to go
deep with them.
I'm going to sacrifice
what I have
with these other people
to go deep
with these people
and a lot of times
what happens is
you have this kind of
fear of relationship loss.
Well
if I do that
I'm going to lose
those relationships
that are really good
but that's the catch.
In God's kingdom
that's not how it works.
If those are real
if that's a real relationship
you're not going to lose that
you just gain new ones.
Because
Mark 8.35 says
whoever would save his life
will lose it
but whoever loses his life
for my sake
and the gospel
will save it.
And so
we think
oh if I
if I sacrifice
my existing relationships
and the depth
that I have with them
in order to build
to put the right
relational capital
into a different relationship
and build that
I will lose this
but no
by
by losing it
you gain.
And over time
what's happened is
when
Gene and I
have done that
with our family
it's not that
we've lost those relationships
it's just been added
on and on and on.
And now we have
so many great relationships
because in different
seasons of time
we gave a lot
of relational capital
to go deep
with a few.
and then
but we didn't
lose the other ones.
We didn't lose
the other ones.
It just keeps growing.
And I know people
psychologists
and people
will say like
you can only handle
so many.
Says who?
Does the word of God
say that?
Does the word of God
say that you
can't have that many
good relationships?
I don't care
what those guys say.
You can.
I've seen it by experience.
I've seen it
in other people's lives
but it takes sacrifice.
It takes sacrifice.
Are you willing
to become
relationship poor
in one area
so that someone else
can become
relationship rich?
What kind of
what a great gift
to be able to give people
but to multiply family
and say
I want to give you
relationship richness.
I've experienced something
and now I want to
give it to you.
Because the question is
is relationship generosity
optional?
Is it optional
to be relationship generous?
I don't think it is.
Let's take a look.
Let's look in 2 Corinthians
a little bit more.
There's this concept
in 2 Corinthians
that's hit
a bunch of times
and it's a biblical concept
not just 2 Corinthians
it's in the rest
of scripture
but just looking
in 2 Corinthians
here primarily
it's this concept
that when you're blessed
the purpose
of your blessing
is to bless.
So blessed
to be a blessing.
Blessed to bless.
Let's take a look at it.
2 Corinthians chapter 1
verses 3 to 4
it says
Blessed be the God
and Father
of our Lord Jesus Christ
the Father of mercies
and God of all comfort
who comforts us
in all our affliction.
Stop there.
Why?
Comfort is a blessing.
We've been blessed
with comfort.
Why does God
give us comfort?
Just for us?
Just for us to enjoy?
He comforts us
in all our affliction
next word
so that
okay
so now he's telling us
why
so that we may be able
to comfort those
who are in any affliction
with the comfort
with which we ourselves
are comforted by God.
So God comforts us
so we can do what?
Comfort others.
He blesses us
so we can bless others.
Is it not true
in the same way
that he gives us
an experience
of deep relationship
and family
so that we can give it
to other people
who don't have that?
Is that not what God wants?
You know how many people
I mean by far
over the last 13 years
almost every single person
who I meet
who's coming into church
or is looking for a church
they all say the same thing.
Like what are you after here?
What's going on?
I just want community.
You know if you
there's studies done
there's a loneliness epidemic
right now in the world.
People are just so lonely.
Loneliness is the norm.
Our technological culture
right now
is literally designed
to create loneliness.
Right?
The way we do life
is built that way.
And so people
don't have relationships.
People don't know
how to talk to one another.
Texting has made it
really weird.
You know?
People don't know
how to talk face to face.
They don't understand
body language.
They don't understand
relating to one another.
They certainly don't
understand family.
They don't understand
what it's like
to have relationships
outside of blood
that are like family.
And most of the people
don't even understand
what it's like
in an actual blood family.
and if you have
experienced that
in family
and outside of family
in a spiritual family
and you have
a whole bunch of people
all over Raytown
all over Kansas City
who have not experienced that
and you have a whole bunch
of other people
even professing Christians
who have not experienced that
and you've been given
that revelation
and you know how to build it
you know how to experience it
you're relationship rich.
If you then are not willing
to become relationship poor
so others can become
relationship rich
what does that say about us?
Is that not selfish?
Is that not just a slap
in the face
of the one who taught us
to be relationship poor
so others can be
relationship rich?
Jesus himself
who became poor
so that we could become rich?
Isn't that just like
a total forgetting
of the gospel
and that we've been cleansed
from our past sin?
We've been blessed
to be a blessing.
2 Corinthians chapter 8
verse 14
he says this
he says
your abundance
at the present time
should supply their need
so that their abundance
may supply your need
that there be any fairness.
So again
it's the same concept.
Why are you given abundance?
So that your abundance
can supply their need.
You've been blessed
to be a blessing.
Do you have an abundance
of healthy relationships?
Are you just so content
with them
that you're not
willing to do the work
to give other people that
and to find that
with other people?
We can't be selfish in that.
Your abundance
at the present time
is there
so that you can supply
someone else's need.
Same thing
in 2 Corinthians chapter 9
next chapter
verse 6
he's speaking
of finances again here
but I think
there's a bigger picture
of giving.
The point is this
in verse 6
whoever sows sparingly
will also reap sparingly
whoever sows bountifully
will also reap bountifully.
Each one must give
as he has decided
in his heart
not reluctantly
under compulsion
for God loves
a cheerful giver
and God is able
to make all grace
abound to you
so that having
all sufficiency
in all things
at all times
you may abound
in every good work.
As it is written
he has distributed freely
he has given to the poor
his righteousness
endures forever.
he who supplies
seed to the sower
and bread for food
will supply and multiply
your seed for sowing
and increase the harvest
of your righteousness.
You will be enriched
in every way
to be generous
in every way
which through us
will produce
thanksgiving to God.
So he's literally saying
when you give
he'll multiply
your ability to give
so you can give more
because some people
are like
if I do this
I won't have enough
in the tank.
that's not true.
The Bible says
that when you give
faithfully
he gives you power
and ability
he enriches you
in every way
to be generous
in every way.
You say
if I become
relationship poor
I won't have enough
to make others
relationship rich.
He says no
you will be enriched
in every way
to be generous
in every way.
Your giving
and becoming poor
only makes it
so that God
gives you more
to keep giving.
That's the economy
of God.
Well if I give
I won't have any left.
No you will be
he will supply
and multiply
your seed
not for yourself
but for sowing.
He'll multiply
your seed
for sowing
and you'll be
enriched in every way
to be generous
in every way
which through us
will produce
thanksgiving to God
which is why we do it.
It's for the glory of God.
It produces
thanksgiving to God
for the ministry
of this service
is not only supplying
the needs of the saints
but is also overflowing
in many thanksgivings
to God.
By their approval
of this service
they will glorify God
because of your submission
that comes from
your confession
of the gospel of Christ
and the generosity
of your contribution
for them
and for all others
while they long
for you
and pray for you
because of the surpassing
grace of God
upon you.
Thanks be to God
for this inexpressible gift.
Okay?
So
essentially
God has given us
the gift
if you've
ever experienced
close relationship
if you've ever
experienced
church as family
some of you
maybe you haven't
you've seen it
from a distance
you've heard it
talked about
but you haven't
really experienced that
but if you have
you now have
a responsibility
if you've experienced
church as family
in that deep
abiding relationship
where you have
relationships
that are even
stronger than blood
you now have
a responsibility
to give that
away to others
to sacrifice
what you have
built there
so that you can
spend more time
building it
with other people
and
this is a
submission
that comes
from your
confession
of the gospel
of Christ
and the generosity
of your contribution
for them and others
when you believe
the gospel
you then submit
to a
gospel lifestyle
meaning
when you know
that God
became poor
so that you
could become
rich
you then submit
out of your
confession of the gospel
and say
I'm going to do
the same
I'm not just going
to preach the gospel
I'm going to
demonstrate it
by my very life
and so it
becomes normative
for us
in hopefully
church culture
to say
I'm willing to
sacrifice my
time
energy
and even
relationships
that are so good
that I love
and I get so much
life from
but I'm going to
sacrifice the time
I spend with them
in order
that I can
focus on
a few people
that I don't
have that with
or who don't
have that all
together
to give them
that
what great
gift is that
to give people
relationship richness
and what does it
result in
thanksgiving to God
what does it result
in
glorifying
of God
this is
they will glorify
God because
of your submission
that comes from
your confession
of the gospel
this is unto
God's glory
basically what
this is
is just
being others
focused
and what the
tendency can be
is that I only
think about myself
I want my
good relationships
I want my
time with my
best friend
like I just
love being with
so and so
it's so easy
it's so light
it's so natural
and then
when I
you know
when I spent
that with my
missional community
who I don't know
as well
it's just
it's not the same
you know
when I spent
time with even
maybe people
in Christchurch
because maybe
I got better
relationships
outside of
Christchurch
so yeah
I do the
Christchurch thing
because I signed
up for that
and I'm here
but you know
outside of
Christchurch
I got this
one relationship
or there's
two or three
or four
it's like
if I really
want to get
the goods
that's where
I go
and you
need to
understand
that will
that
that will
grind the
gears
of our
progress
forward
as a
church
both for
our
relational
wholeness
our
evangelistic
outreach
and the
glory
of God
and it's
important to
see that
that that's
not without
consequence
we do that
and it's
essentially
selfish
we should
be other
centered
2nd
Corinthians
chapter 1
you see this
concept in
all throughout
2nd
Corinthians
2nd
Corinthians
1
24
he says
not that
we lord
it over
your faith
but we
work with
you
for your
joy
for you
stand firm
in your
faith
for your
joy
so it's
basically
saying
I'm going
to work
with you
not just
for my
joy
and that's
maturity
says
I don't
seek
relationships
just for
my joy
I'm working
with you
for
your joy
I've been
blessed
I already
have so many
great
relationships
I want
to give
them to
you
I want
to make
you
relationship
rich
I'm working
with you
for
your joy
do you
do that
do you
work for
others
joy
is it
only
for you
is only
what I
can get
out of
it
when you
say
how's
your
missional
community
it's
just
like
oh
it's
alright
is
it's
not
that
great
are you
saying
that
because
you're
not
getting
much
out
of
it
or
because
the
people
in
your
missional
community
aren't
getting
much
from
you
ever
thought
about
that
well
it's
not
very
good
because
I'm
not
getting
anything
why aren't
you a little
selfish
person
oh I'm
sorry I
forgot that
the whole
world revolves
around you
you know
no what
about if we
thought well
it's actually
not going
that good
because
I'm not
giving
other people
joy
that'd be
legitimate
right
or it's
going great
why
because I'm
getting so
much
no it's
going great
because I've
found many
ways now
to give
other people
relationship
joy and
richness
and it's
awesome
do you see
the difference
there
it's an
important
distinction
2 Corinthians
5
just a
classic
one of my
faves
in our
gospel
motivation
2 Corinthians
5 14
to 15
says
for the
love of
Christ
controls
us
because
we have
concluded
this
that one
has died
for all
therefore
all have
died
and he
died
for all
why
he died
for all
that
those
who
live
might
no
longer
live
for
themselves
but
for him
who
for their
sake
died
and was
raised
okay
so
again
it's
that
gospel
reality
that
caused
us
to
say
I
don't
live
for
myself
anymore
this is
what the
Moravians
had
carved
in their
rings
none
lives
for
themselves
if you
want to
be a
people
that makes
people
relationship
rich
we have
to not
live for
ourselves
and be
able to
become
relationship
poor
for their
sake
and how
do we
do that
like how
how could
you
how do you
sacrifice
something you
really love
you have to be able to have something that you love more
you have to have something that's better
to be able to actually say
I'm going to give this up
well why are you doing that
because
the love of Christ
controls me
another version says
the love of Christ
compels me
you know
we love because he first loved us
1 John 4 19
you know Luke 7 47
those have been forgiven much
love much
uh
Romans 12 verse 1
in view of God's mercy
offer your body's living sacrifice
it's all this
something else proceeds
it's the gospel
it's who God is
and what he's done
and when you know that
and you believe it
it says
I will no longer live for myself
I'm dead
so
it's not about me
you
you decided to become a part of this church plant
you know
some from the beginning
some have come later
I'm asking you
are you in it
for others
because of Christ
right
are you in it
for others
or are you in it for you
if you're in it for you
roadblock
wonkiness
difficulty
little gear grinding
this engine ain't working so hot
yeah
or it's working a little too hot right now
we need a little lubricating
of the relationships there
we need some
relationship oil in there
right
2 Corinthians chapter 8
verse 23
it says
as for Titus
2 Corinthians 8 verse 23
as for Titus
he is my partner
and fellow worker
for your benefit
you see it again
there's a theme
all throughout 2 Corinthians
Titus is my partner
and fellow worker
for your benefit
that's partnership
right
that's partnership
where you just say
you could say
someone else in this church
you could say
hey
so and so
is my partner
and my fellow worker
and what does that mean
for your benefit
not for themselves
but for somebody else
for your benefit
for you to become
a relationship rich
moving to 2 Corinthians chapter 12
2 Corinthians 12 verse 15
Paul makes this
amazing statement
regarding the Corinthians
and he says
I will most gladly spend
and be spent
for
your souls
okay
if I love you more
am I to be loved less
he says
I will most gladly spend
and be spent
for your souls
so it's not just spending
but it's being spent
so it's not just giving
of your resources
it's giving of yourself
it's like
that's what Paul said
to the Thessalonians
right
he said
I share with you
not only the gospel
but our very lives
he's saying here
I'm not just spending
but I'm being spent
and in order to build
relationship richness
in other people
you have to spend
and be spent
how are we doing on that
how are we doing
on spending
and being spent
in our relationships
are we pressing through
and saying
alright
this is going to cost
it's not just going to cost
my stuff
my money
my time
it's going to cost me
I'm not just going to spend
but I'm going to be spent
that's what it takes
to build relational depth
relational familial
experience of church
it takes us
spending and being spent
and notice what he says though
I will most gladly spend
and be spent
how do you do it gladly
the gospel
you remember the gospel
are you
some of you are spending
and being spent
and maybe a little bit
of the gladness wore off
you know
it's like hey
I'm doing it man
get off my case
I'm spending
and being spent
don't tell me
I'm not doing it
I'm doing it
are you glad
no
you know
we have to be glad in it
I'm spent
I'm being spent
but Paul added
one other thing
he said
I will most gladly
spend and be spent
and that's the key
you can spend
and be spent
and everyone's just
a bunch of grumpy
church curmudgeons
and we don't really have
like you know
that kind of relationship
oil lubricating
the relationship
so all the gears
are working well
and we're just
enjoying one another
and there's grace
and compassion
and forgiveness
and it's just
you know
understanding that
yeah you're not like me
but that's okay
I love you
yeah you don't
understand how to do
this that great
but I love you
and I don't understand
how to do some things either
so I'm gonna be merciful
for you
hopefully you're merciful
to me
and there's this
give and take relationship
and I'll most gladly
spend and be spent
for you
when you have a culture
of gladly being spent
and being spent
or another way to say it
see when you spend
and you're spent
you're becoming poor
right
so gladly spending
and being spent
even giving up
relationships
you know are easier
you know you could get
more life from immediately
you'll gladly spend
those relationships
in order
to build it
with other people
gladly spent
and being spent
jumping out of there
for two more verses here
Romans 13 verse 8
says
owe no one anything
except to love one another
okay
you basically say
I owe it
to other people
to love them
like I have a debt
to them
to love them
like that's
I'm constantly looking
like how can I just
pay this debt
to love one another
that's the thing
I want to owe
and then Philippians 2
last verse
the classic
selfless verse
Philippians 2
3 to 4
do nothing from selfish
ambition or conceit
but in humility
count others
more significant
than yourselves
let each of you
not look only
to his own interests
but also
to the interest
of others
are we doing that
do you specifically
have some relationships
in Christchurch
or outside of Christchurch
that you need to sacrifice
in order to focus
your time and energy
with some different
relationships
in Christchurch
do you
if you do
I'm challenging you
do it
but it's not
death unto death
it's death unto life
okay
if you think
it's death unto death
that's not very motivating
just wait
you want me to give up
these relationships
to not get any relationships
no no no
I'm saying
give up those relationships
to get new relationships
while you keep
the other ones
that's what you get
you get it all
this is why Jesus said
if you give up lands
and homes
and your life
will you not just gain
even more
in this life
and in the life to come
right
how is he saying that
because that's what happens
but it comes on the back
of sacrifice
and so we're not willing
to do that
I think some of us
are thinking
why am I not gaining
traction
in some of these
relationships
in Christchurch
why am we
we stuck in certain
relationships
in the missional community
and there could be
other reasons
I'm not saying
this is the only reason
but I think
some of it
is because
we're supplementing
somewhere else
and we're ruining
our relationship dinner
right
we've been snacking
over here
and getting all
the stuff here
and then we get over
to the table
of the relationships
in our missional community
and saying
yeah I'm already full
I'm good
I'm not really hungry
and then the other
people who are hungry
they don't get anything
to eat
and that's unfortunate
and we have to make sure
that we don't do that
amen
let's persevere
with gratitude
into these things
you guys can come up
that's one other thing
I want to remind us of
before we were sent out
as the church here
at Bellacos
three of the words
that God gave us
to focus on this year
was build
persevere
and gratitude
and just starting this church
is definitely building
right
I mean
you guys
are very much
in the world
of building
but don't forget
the other two things
because I think
they're really important
and especially now
to persevere
with gratitude
gratitude
you know
even like what
Seth was saying
during our time
in communion together
when he was talking
about grumbling
like
once you hit
those relationship walls
are you grumbling
or are you persevering
with gratitude
God gave us those words
for a reason
and just because
you guys were sent out
doesn't mean
that it wasn't
still spoken to you
at the beginning
of the year as well
and I think
they're just as
applicable for
applicable for us now
that we would
persevere with gratitude
and just say
hey
whatever
whatever difficulty
there is
I'm going to
persevere through it
I'm going to
build these relationships
I'm going to
do what it takes
Amen