WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:07.280 You take your seats. Turn up again, 1 Corinthians 7, page 955 in the Black Church Bibles. 00:00:08.380 --> 00:00:13.700 And this is where we are. We took a break for Easter, and we're back now in the book of 1 Corinthians, 00:00:13.859 --> 00:00:19.019 and we're dealing with the themes that are here because that's the next page in the story. If you're 00:00:19.019 --> 00:00:23.940 visiting with us this morning, we're simply going through this book section by section. 00:00:25.480 --> 00:00:29.859 Well, on the 2-7 this week, I had that experience that lots of you will be familiar with. 00:00:30.719 --> 00:00:39.480 If you travel on buses, and that is the overheard conversation on the phone, the animated phone call. 00:00:40.980 --> 00:00:45.960 And all the way from Acton Vale to West Ealing Broadway, I can tell you, you would be astonished 00:00:45.960 --> 00:00:53.320 if you knew what she said and what he did and what they're going to do and so on. 00:00:55.159 --> 00:00:58.859 Because I could only hear one side of the conversation, that's how it works. There are 00:00:58.859 --> 00:01:03.880 gaps, aren't there? There are missing details. There's a context that I don't actually have 00:01:03.880 --> 00:01:10.599 access to. The book of 1 Corinthians is a bit like that. It's a bit like that one side of a phone call. 00:01:10.680 --> 00:01:16.299 We can hear what Paul is saying as he is addressing the Corinthians, but we only have his end of the 00:01:16.299 --> 00:01:21.180 call, and we aren't always completely clear on what is being said at the other side. You see, 00:01:21.180 --> 00:01:25.700 there has been some correspondence between Paul and the Corinthian church before this. 00:01:25.700 --> 00:01:31.079 We realize that he began the letter by saying, 1 verse 11, it has been reported to me by Chloe's 00:01:31.079 --> 00:01:36.740 people. So what he's heard and is writing to the Corinthians about has come to him from Chloe's 00:01:36.740 --> 00:01:42.599 people. But here we are, chapter 7 verse 1, and he says, but now about the matters about which you 00:01:42.599 --> 00:01:48.540 wrote. So there's been correspondence and he is now responding. This is his side of the call, 00:01:48.540 --> 00:01:54.700 his side of the conversation. We're not absolutely clear on how they put across what they said and 00:01:54.700 --> 00:02:01.960 what exactly was in there. But responding to their questions, the matters about which he wrote, 00:02:02.300 --> 00:02:10.319 will take up much of the rest of the letter. And although we're not completely sure of the other 00:02:10.319 --> 00:02:15.360 side of the call, we are clear on the topic, certainly the topics this morning. They are sex, 00:02:15.360 --> 00:02:21.980 singleness, and marriage. And Paul's response on those three issues, the first bit of 1 Corinthians 00:02:21.980 --> 00:02:29.920 7, in fact, will be in these themes actually for a while. Paul seems to be concerned with the way the 00:02:29.920 --> 00:02:34.820 Corinthians are approaching these things. In fact, it doesn't seem to be. He is concerned with the way 00:02:34.820 --> 00:02:40.840 they're approaching them. And underlying their problem, it seems to be their selfishness. 00:02:40.840 --> 00:02:47.819 They're being selfish in these areas. Now, before we get stuck in, it's important to say that this is 00:02:47.819 --> 00:02:54.520 not all that the Bible has to say on these matters. We shouldn't build our theology of marriage or our 00:02:54.520 --> 00:02:59.199 theology of singleness from this one chapter. One commentator puts it like this. He says, 00:02:59.300 --> 00:03:05.199 Paul is speaking to, quote, a specific situation at Corinth and is not offering in this chapter a 00:03:05.199 --> 00:03:12.579 compendium of his views on marriage and sexuality. In fact, if you turn over the page and look down 00:03:12.579 --> 00:03:20.679 to verse 26 of the chapter, Paul speaks there about a present distress. In some translations, 00:03:20.899 --> 00:03:27.419 this present crisis. There is something going on in Corinth at the time that is shaping and framing the 00:03:27.419 --> 00:03:33.079 way he is giving his advice and the answers that he's offering. We'll get to that, Lord willing, 00:03:33.080 --> 00:03:38.780 in due time. But the first matter that he turns to is something that the Corinthians have said. Verse 00:03:38.780 --> 00:03:45.720 1, do you see that? It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman. It's in quotes, 00:03:45.820 --> 00:03:50.520 that's what the Corinthians have said, and he takes it out and he begins to address it. Now, 00:03:51.160 --> 00:03:54.520 if you've been with us, and many of you have, you've been with us in these early chapters, 00:03:54.860 --> 00:03:58.000 initially that sounds like a strange thing for the Corinthians to be saying. 00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:03.699 We know that they are a church that have been embracing sexual immorality, for example. 00:04:04.099 --> 00:04:08.460 They've been visiting prostitutes, and that has been considered okay within the life of the church. 00:04:08.879 --> 00:04:15.719 Why would they be holding out celibacy as a virtue now? It is not good for a man to have sexual 00:04:15.719 --> 00:04:22.319 relations with a woman. Why would they be saying that? Well, the fact is promiscuity and celibacy 00:04:22.319 --> 00:04:27.480 aren't actually as far apart in terms of what motivates them as we might think. Of course, 00:04:27.540 --> 00:04:35.259 the behavior is very different, but if you're following your appetites into sex or denying your 00:04:35.259 --> 00:04:43.459 appetites in celibacy, they can actually be opposite ways of the same desire to take control of your body, 00:04:44.199 --> 00:04:49.939 to take control of your life, to have you at the center living on your terms. 00:04:49.939 --> 00:04:55.560 I heard a Trappist monk make this point one time. He said this, he said, 00:04:55.639 --> 00:04:59.680 you can drink your friends under the table as a way of finding significance or self-worth, 00:04:59.980 --> 00:05:05.680 or you can enter a monastery, as he had done, where you fast the other monks under the table for the 00:05:05.680 --> 00:05:14.600 same reason. Very different behaviors, both expressing the same desire, and it's the desire to be in charge of 00:05:14.600 --> 00:05:22.140 your life. It's the desire to take control and put yourself at the center. You taking control of your 00:05:22.140 --> 00:05:32.100 body for your sake is exactly what dozens and dozens of online gurus are selling today, and we are buying in 00:05:32.100 --> 00:05:39.500 our droves. It is a very contemporary thing. Now, of course, there's plenty of good in self-mastery, 00:05:39.500 --> 00:05:48.240 but not if it comes at the detriment of serving others. Not if it comes really as an expression of 00:05:48.240 --> 00:05:53.939 you at the center of everything. The self-mastery, the taking control of things, the denying yourself 00:05:53.939 --> 00:05:59.180 certain things that he's talking about here, that might be a good thing insofar as it enables you to 00:05:59.180 --> 00:06:03.540 serve others. The problem is, in Corinth, people are making everything all about themselves. 00:06:03.540 --> 00:06:12.140 That's the Corinthian problem. So, Paul challenges this in these areas of sex, singleness, and marriage. 00:06:12.340 --> 00:06:18.580 Here's point number one. Paul says this. He says, sex is good. Serve your spouse. That's verses one to 00:06:18.580 --> 00:06:24.200 five. Sex is good. Serve your spouse. Because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should 00:06:24.200 --> 00:06:31.780 have his own wife and each woman her own husband. Now, chapter six, if you remember, Paul has just told us 00:06:31.779 --> 00:06:39.519 that sexual sin is a sin against Christ. It's a sin against your own body, and it is a sin against the 00:06:39.519 --> 00:06:47.219 Holy Spirit. Sexual sin is in a category that is incredibly significant because it desecrates 00:06:47.219 --> 00:06:56.919 something that belongs to God in profound ways. But the sex bit isn't the problem. It's the sinful use 00:06:56.920 --> 00:07:03.180 of it that is the problem. Sex is good, Paul is saying. And in the context that God has created, 00:07:03.319 --> 00:07:10.060 verses two and three, between husband and wife, do you see? It should be, well, verse five, it should 00:07:10.060 --> 00:07:17.060 be pursued. Do not deprive one another so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 00:07:17.060 --> 00:07:25.420 It is natural that men find women attractive and that women find men attractive and that they want 00:07:25.420 --> 00:07:31.519 to have sex. That is a natural thing. And God has created marriage as the place in which these desires 00:07:31.519 --> 00:07:38.379 can be expressed, not just expressed, but pursued and enjoyed. The old Anglican wedding ceremony puts 00:07:38.379 --> 00:07:43.939 this in the introduction. It says, marriage is for mutual companionship. Marriage is for having children, 00:07:43.939 --> 00:07:51.980 but also, quote, in order that the natural instincts and affections implanted by God should be hallowed and 00:07:51.980 --> 00:07:59.420 directed aright. Marriage puts guardrails around the sexual realm so that the desires that we've been 00:07:59.420 --> 00:08:06.600 created with can be exercised with freedom and with joy. But here's the thing, and here's what Paul is 00:08:06.600 --> 00:08:13.319 concerned about in this context. When you don't fulfill these desires as God has designed, they don't go away. 00:08:13.939 --> 00:08:20.719 And because we are sinful, and because those desires themselves are very powerful, and it's a power 00:08:20.719 --> 00:08:26.100 that in our day is ramped up significantly by our hyper-sexualized culture, well, we're tempted to 00:08:26.100 --> 00:08:33.159 follow these desires outside the marriage bed. Amongst the worst animals that exist in the world are urban 00:08:33.159 --> 00:08:44.199 foxes. Urban foxes, I hate urban foxes, with a kind of unmatched arrogance. They swagger around our 00:08:44.199 --> 00:08:50.059 neighborhoods, terrorizing us, scattering rubbish everywhere, digging up our gardens. I went to war 00:08:50.059 --> 00:08:55.939 with the ones that dug up my garden a number of years ago. I went to war with them. It consumed my 00:08:55.940 --> 00:09:04.140 every waking, and sometimes woke me in the night thought, but they beat me. Every time I blocked a 00:09:04.140 --> 00:09:08.540 hole in the fence, every time I put wire up in some way, they found another way to get in. 00:09:09.320 --> 00:09:15.400 They would make their mess, and they would kind of smugly leave a chicken carcass there just to rub my 00:09:15.400 --> 00:09:22.880 nose in it. That's just what foxes are designed to do. Actually, they're just doing simply what they 00:09:22.879 --> 00:09:28.539 were designed to do. Our sexual desires are a bit like urban foxes. If you try and stop them, 00:09:28.600 --> 00:09:33.899 they will always find another avenue for their expression. And so Paul is saying, in this 00:09:33.899 --> 00:09:39.559 situation, don't put off marriage. Don't choose indefinite celibacy. Get married, and in your 00:09:39.559 --> 00:09:44.659 marriage, don't deprive one another. Verse 3, the husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, 00:09:44.980 --> 00:09:49.059 likewise the wife to her husband. Verse 4, the wife does not have authority over her own body, 00:09:49.059 --> 00:09:53.139 but the husband does. Likewise, the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife 00:09:53.139 --> 00:09:59.099 does. This is back to Paul's big point. We'll see it. It's a thread that runs all the way through. In 00:09:59.099 --> 00:10:03.619 fact, you could say it runs through all of his letters. The Christian life is not about you. 00:10:04.379 --> 00:10:10.979 It's about serving others. In this case, serving your spouse. And Paul is saying you're obligated to 00:10:10.979 --> 00:10:16.339 one another in the bedroom. There is complete mutuality in the bedroom, and neither spouse is allowed 00:10:16.340 --> 00:10:23.860 to go on strike. There is one qualifier there in verse 5, if you agree together to abstain for a time 00:10:23.860 --> 00:10:29.700 of prayer, but that's only to be for a short time. Do you see? Otherwise, he says, fulfill your obligations. 00:10:31.540 --> 00:10:39.580 But two things to say. Now, you hear this? Because we like rules, we want to know, well, how often does 00:10:39.580 --> 00:10:46.220 this mean? Give me a number. How often is regular? Well, the answer is as often as your spouse would 00:10:46.220 --> 00:10:53.100 like. You should probably discuss it. That would be a good thing to do. But when Paul says that you 00:10:53.100 --> 00:10:58.540 can abstain for a limited time for prayer, that implies that regular sex is the norm. 00:11:00.300 --> 00:11:05.420 Second thing to say is this. The marriage bed must be governed by the rule of love. 00:11:05.419 --> 00:11:12.379 Paul will say later, 1 Corinthians 13 verse 5, love does not insist on its own way. 00:11:14.379 --> 00:11:18.899 That should guide our approach to all aspects of life, but the marriage bed is included. 00:11:20.179 --> 00:11:25.419 Notice how the obligations are described in terms of giving, not taking. Giving, not demanding. 00:11:26.539 --> 00:11:30.360 If your spouse doesn't fulfill your obligations in the bedroom, that doesn't mean that you can 00:11:30.360 --> 00:11:40.279 insist on them anyway. Paul describes mutual giving, not taking. Mutual love, not give me what I'm owed. 00:11:41.720 --> 00:11:46.600 So we should be willing, the rule of love, but be understanding and patient. 00:11:48.200 --> 00:11:54.039 I think those two things are important that we acknowledge. So, love, it is not selfishness that 00:11:54.039 --> 00:12:01.319 must govern these obligations. He says, sex is good. We should serve our spouse, but love must govern 00:12:01.319 --> 00:12:09.319 these obligations. Before we move on, second point, I do want to say this. I recognize that we could fall 00:12:09.319 --> 00:12:17.959 short of what Paul says here in all kinds of different ways. Sexual sin, delaying marriage for selfish 00:12:17.960 --> 00:12:27.800 reasons, leading to more sexual sin, adultery, getting snared in pornography, being stingy in the bedroom. 00:12:27.800 --> 00:12:35.960 We could fail in multiple ways. So, it's important to remember that the grace of Christ is offered for 00:12:35.960 --> 00:12:43.400 every single sin, and He meets us in our failures. The gospel offers hope to sexual sinners. 00:12:43.399 --> 00:12:51.240 In the Lord Jesus Christ, remember, you are washed, you are sanctified, you are justified. 00:12:53.879 --> 00:13:02.559 So, where we fall, we should repent, lift our heads, put right what we can, and step forward in the grace 00:13:02.559 --> 00:13:08.899 that He supplies. That's the first point. Sex is good. Serve your spouse. Point number two, 00:13:08.899 --> 00:13:16.819 Paul moves on. Singleness is good. Serve the Lord. Singleness is good. Serve the Lord. Verse 7, 00:13:18.500 --> 00:13:24.860 verse 6, now as a concession, not a command, I say this, I wish that all were as I myself am, 00:13:25.559 --> 00:13:30.980 but each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. To the unmarried and the widows, 00:13:30.980 --> 00:13:38.940 I say that it is good for them to remain single as I am. Now, I take the concession here to relate to 00:13:38.940 --> 00:13:45.300 the situation in Corinth, that present distress that he talks about in verse 26. This isn't a command 00:13:45.300 --> 00:13:52.100 from the Old Testament law, nor is it something that was taught by the Lord Jesus. But as a concession to 00:13:52.100 --> 00:13:59.180 this current persecution or famine or whatever the major social upheaval is, Paul says, I actually wish 00:13:59.179 --> 00:14:06.500 that all people were single like me. Now, it's interesting to me that we aren't told what the 00:14:06.500 --> 00:14:16.500 crisis involved, but we are told here that singleness is good. That would have been surprising in the 00:14:16.500 --> 00:14:21.819 cultural context. And yet, Paul is clear, verse 8, if you're not married or if you're widowed, 00:14:22.699 --> 00:14:28.039 then don't think that your singleness makes you spiritually deficient in some way. 00:14:29.179 --> 00:14:37.519 You're in the same situation as the apostle. But can you see, in referring to himself here, 00:14:38.059 --> 00:14:46.379 you see the way he says, single as I am. Paul is highlighting how his singleness serves the kind 00:14:46.379 --> 00:14:53.580 of work that he was doing, single as I am, in order that you could emulate the way that I live. 00:14:55.820 --> 00:14:59.500 He couldn't have done the kind of pioneering mission work. He couldn't have gone on his 00:14:59.500 --> 00:15:05.059 missionary journeys and served a wife or raised children in the way that the Bible expects. 00:15:07.200 --> 00:15:11.500 Missionary biographies often say very little about their spouses, usually because their spouses were 00:15:11.500 --> 00:15:17.919 struggling at home without them. In their mission endeavors, they failed their wives and would have 00:15:17.919 --> 00:15:22.460 been better remaining single. That's his point. Paul is saying singleness is better in those kind 00:15:22.460 --> 00:15:29.500 of contexts. We'll say more on this in a couple of weeks' time, Lord willing. Paul also says that 00:15:29.500 --> 00:15:36.100 singleness is good if you've been gifted with celibacy. Verse 7, each has his own gift from God. He's 00:15:36.100 --> 00:15:41.659 introducing God's gifts into the situation here, one of one kind and one of another. He's just warned 00:15:41.659 --> 00:15:46.879 in the verses before against choosing celibacy when you haven't been gifted in this way. 00:15:47.800 --> 00:15:52.460 And he acknowledges that not everyone is in the same boat as him, but there are some who are, 00:15:52.860 --> 00:16:00.660 and that is good, and it should be used accordingly. That singleness, that gift of celibacy should be 00:16:00.659 --> 00:16:08.179 embraced for all the freedom that it affords in order to serve God. Celibacy, which we could just 00:16:08.179 --> 00:16:16.039 simply describe as sexual purity, is what all of us are called to outside of marriage, but not all of us 00:16:16.039 --> 00:16:22.819 have been gifted with it. How do you know if you have the gift? It's pretty simple. You aren't caught up 00:16:22.819 --> 00:16:26.919 with lust, you're not looking at porn, and you're not troubled by sexual fantasies. 00:16:26.919 --> 00:16:34.399 It is a gift that allows you to stay the right side of verse 9. Look at verse 9. It means that 00:16:34.399 --> 00:16:39.899 you're able to exercise self-control. It means that you're able to live in a way that doesn't burn with 00:16:39.899 --> 00:16:48.919 passion. So Paul, again, is coming back to this need to avoid sexual sin. Singleness is good, and you 00:16:48.919 --> 00:16:53.860 should use it to serve the Lord. But if your singleness is leading you into sin, he's saying then you should 00:16:53.860 --> 00:17:04.380 marry. Find a godly person of the opposite sex and pursue marriage. I can imagine some of you say, 00:17:04.440 --> 00:17:10.880 well, look, it's not that simple. I know some of you want to be married, and it hasn't happened. 00:17:11.660 --> 00:17:18.660 I understand that. I understand that that is painful. I don't know why God holds this back in some cases, 00:17:18.660 --> 00:17:28.120 but I do know that it isn't because he's being mean. If that's you, I want to say keep trusting him, 00:17:29.120 --> 00:17:36.000 and keep using the freedoms that you have to serve him while you wait. Recognize, too, that for some, 00:17:36.600 --> 00:17:42.420 the struggle is the opposite sex bit. Find someone of the opposite sex. You know how God has designed 00:17:42.420 --> 00:17:49.080 marriage, but your desires push you in a different direction. I want to say, in that situation, 00:17:49.900 --> 00:17:56.860 those desires can change, and you can pray that the Lord would do that. So don't rule out marriage as he 00:17:56.860 --> 00:18:03.100 has designed it. But however your desires lead you, if you aren't gifted in the way that Paul is 00:18:03.099 --> 00:18:13.000 describing here, but you fight every day for purity, God delights in your faithfulness. That is a good 00:18:13.000 --> 00:18:23.899 thing. The point is this. Whatever God has or doesn't currently have for you, don't waste your singleness 00:18:23.899 --> 00:18:32.199 by thinking it's inferior, and you have to somehow upgrade to marriage. If you're not married, or you 00:18:32.200 --> 00:18:41.160 were married, you're a valuable part of this church, just as you are. You don't need to move from that 00:18:41.160 --> 00:18:46.460 state to some sort of different state as a way of saying that would be what godliness looks like. 00:18:48.420 --> 00:18:53.240 Marriage is not essential for godliness. Singleness is good. Serve the Lord. 00:18:53.240 --> 00:19:07.440 Thirdly, marriage is good. Serve your vows. Serve your marriage vows. Verse 10, 00:19:07.579 --> 00:19:13.740 to the married I give this charge. Not I, but the Lord. The wife should not separate from her husband. 00:19:14.359 --> 00:19:18.740 But if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband, and the husband 00:19:18.740 --> 00:19:27.500 should not divorce his wife. Now, when Paul says here, not I, but the Lord, he isn't distinguishing 00:19:27.500 --> 00:19:33.759 his teaching from Jesus as if his words didn't have authority. He's not saying, this is something 00:19:33.759 --> 00:19:38.759 from the Lord. This is something I've got a bit of a hunch about. It's not that. It's not just his 00:19:38.759 --> 00:19:44.579 opinion that we can take or leave. No, he is directly applying something that Jesus has taught in the 00:19:44.579 --> 00:19:50.879 Gospels, Mark 10, for example, when he says, not I, but the Lord. He's directly applying something like 00:19:50.879 --> 00:19:58.579 that. And he says here, if you're married, stay married. Now, the suggestion here is that the wife 00:19:58.579 --> 00:20:04.480 is initiating separation, and she's being urged then not to remarry and to reconcile. And the husband 00:20:04.480 --> 00:20:09.059 is being told he can't divorce in order that he's able to reconcile if his wife is willing. 00:20:09.059 --> 00:20:17.480 Marriage is good. It was established by God as a general good. It's not just a Christian good. 00:20:18.059 --> 00:20:22.460 And there are plenty of statistics today that prove this. Marriage holds relationships together. 00:20:23.279 --> 00:20:29.099 Marriage is best for children. Marriage is especially good for boys who grow up with both parents in their 00:20:29.099 --> 00:20:36.519 lives. It is also given by God as a picture of the Christian gospel. It is good in that sense. 00:20:36.519 --> 00:20:42.160 In Ephesians 5, Paul says that marriage points us to Christ and his bride, the church. And so, 00:20:42.259 --> 00:20:47.160 in the same way that Christ doesn't leave his bride, Christ doesn't walk out on his marriage, 00:20:47.240 --> 00:20:56.759 neither should we. And this is true, even verse 12, even verse 12, if your spouse is an unbeliever. 00:20:59.319 --> 00:21:03.859 Paul isn't suggesting that a Christian should knowingly marry an unbeliever. That isn't allowed. 00:21:03.859 --> 00:21:09.199 But the question in Corinth is what happens when somebody is already married and they come to 00:21:09.199 --> 00:21:13.319 faith in Christ. That's what Paul means. Look at verse 12 when he says, 00:21:13.740 --> 00:21:21.439 "'8 to the unmarried, 10 to the married, 12 to the rest.'" Surely you're either unmarried or married. 00:21:21.559 --> 00:21:27.379 What does he mean, the rest? Well, he's talking there about mixed marriages, people who have come 00:21:27.380 --> 00:21:33.480 to faith in the context of a marriage that was between two unbelievers. Jesus' teaching in the 00:21:33.480 --> 00:21:38.140 gospels addressed Jewish men married to Jewish women with a shared understanding of the Bible's 00:21:38.140 --> 00:21:43.120 teaching on covenants in general and marriage in particular. But the Corinthian church is made up 00:21:43.120 --> 00:21:49.840 of people who have converted from idolatrous religions. And so, when Paul says, "'I, not the Lord,' 00:21:49.840 --> 00:21:56.320 he's applying the marriage teaching from the gospels into this kind of context. It was a context that 00:21:56.319 --> 00:22:01.720 Jesus didn't have to address." So, he's taking the principle, the teaching from the gospels, 00:22:01.720 --> 00:22:07.019 and he's applying it into the Corinthian situation. So, verse 12, "'If any brother has a wife who is an 00:22:07.019 --> 00:22:12.139 unbeliever and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband 00:22:12.139 --> 00:22:16.759 who is an unbeliever and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving 00:22:16.759 --> 00:22:22.000 husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. 00:22:22.000 --> 00:22:29.279 Otherwise, your children will be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.'" If the unbelieving spouse will 00:22:29.279 --> 00:22:36.480 stay, Paul says, then stay married. One of the concerns in Corinth, especially with Paul's teaching 00:22:36.480 --> 00:22:43.039 on how—what he said back in chapter 6 on how sex creates a one-flesh union, one of the concerns was 00:22:43.039 --> 00:22:49.279 that staying in a marriage when you've become Christian might defile you. But Paul says, no, 00:22:49.279 --> 00:22:56.240 actually the opposite is the case in marriage. Sex with a prostitute defiles you because it is 00:22:56.240 --> 00:23:02.940 outside the marriage bond. In fact, an unbeliever who is married to a believer, it goes the other way. 00:23:03.039 --> 00:23:09.059 They're sanctified. Verse 14, they're made holy. They benefit from being united to the believer rather 00:23:09.059 --> 00:23:15.619 than the other way around. This is true of the spouse and any children that you have. It doesn't 00:23:15.619 --> 00:23:20.399 obviously mean that they are automatically converted. You are only saved through faith in Jesus Christ, 00:23:20.399 --> 00:23:27.539 but it simply means that God views their marriage union and their household as holy and not defiled. 00:23:30.579 --> 00:23:35.879 Paul emphasizes staying together in marriage because marriage is good. 00:23:35.880 --> 00:23:44.300 Even if you're a Christian and your spouse doesn't share your Christian faith, marriage is good. 00:23:45.900 --> 00:23:50.820 Now, this is hard in a culture where marriage is viewed as a convenience, where marriage is viewed 00:23:50.820 --> 00:23:56.120 as something that we can enter into only for as long as it makes us feel good, and we can get out of it. 00:23:56.200 --> 00:24:02.620 We can divorce on the basis of something called no fault. Well, we just didn't fancy it anymore, 00:24:02.619 --> 00:24:08.579 and so we've decided we're going to divorce. In a culture where that's the case, this kind of teaching 00:24:08.579 --> 00:24:16.659 is difficult. Remember Adele back in 2021? She left her husband, and then she wrote a song saying that 00:24:16.659 --> 00:24:23.639 she knows that this is going to damage her son and damage his life, but he should go easy on her. 00:24:24.919 --> 00:24:29.419 What does it say about a culture where a song like that becomes a massive hit, and she gets loads of 00:24:29.420 --> 00:24:35.600 awards that decorate her for putting this out there. It says that we've lost our way, 00:24:35.960 --> 00:24:43.160 and it tells us that taking a different course, serving your vows, even when you don't feel like it, 00:24:43.740 --> 00:24:45.360 is going to be harder and harder to do. 00:24:48.160 --> 00:24:53.360 Now, again, while this isn't all there is to say on the matter, Paul does say that there are grounds 00:24:53.360 --> 00:24:58.420 where divorce is allowed. It isn't encouraged, but it is permitted. The Lord, not Paul, in his teaching 00:24:58.420 --> 00:25:04.060 on divorce in Matthew 19 verse 9, permits divorce for sexual immorality. Paul now adds to that. If an 00:25:04.060 --> 00:25:12.080 unbelieving spouse walks out, verse 15, the believer is not enslaved. If they leave, you're free. If you 00:25:12.080 --> 00:25:18.080 try to stay married, but they walk out, then you're released from the marriage covenant. It's not ideal 00:25:18.080 --> 00:25:25.759 because, verse 15, God has called you to peace. In the messy world that we live in, staying married to 00:25:25.759 --> 00:25:31.579 an unbeliever won't be easy. But as far as it depends on you, Paul is saying, with whatever 00:25:31.579 --> 00:25:37.379 help you can solicit, don't get divorced. In the end, look at verse 16. In the end, you don't know 00:25:37.379 --> 00:25:42.500 what God might do. However difficult it is, you don't know what God might do. How do you know, 00:25:42.619 --> 00:25:46.599 wife, whether you will save your husband? How do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? 00:25:47.460 --> 00:25:53.039 Just as God brought you to salvation, He might be using you to bring your spouse to salvation as well. 00:25:53.039 --> 00:26:00.859 As you embrace God's teaching, being a wife or a husband, according to His design, 00:26:01.559 --> 00:26:09.019 this might be the means God uses to win your spouse. I've seen this happen. God is very, very gracious. 00:26:10.339 --> 00:26:16.720 So I want to say, if this is your situation, stick in, pray on. May the Lord strengthen you. 00:26:16.720 --> 00:26:24.600 Amen. And again, we mustn't forget, with all of this, there is grace for us in the mess. 00:26:26.640 --> 00:26:34.759 Where we have failed, where perhaps others have failed us, the gospel, this table that we're about 00:26:34.759 --> 00:26:41.180 to come to together holds out forgiveness, cleansing. It holds out hope. 00:26:41.180 --> 00:26:51.620 We shouldn't hear this this morning and have it crush us. The gospel is sufficient to cover everything 00:26:51.620 --> 00:26:59.400 that we've done wrong, that has been done wrong to us. We hear Paul's side of this conversation. 00:26:59.600 --> 00:27:05.480 Some things aren't completely clear, but one thing is, and it's this, just as the Son of Man came 00:27:05.480 --> 00:27:15.620 not to be served, but to serve. So it is for those who follow Him. So whatever situation you're in, 00:27:15.759 --> 00:27:22.440 serve your spouse, serve the Lord, serve your marriage vows. Let's pray together. 00:27:22.440 --> 00:27:52.420 Let's pray together.