Genesis chapter 2 verses 18 to 25.
The Lord God said,
It is not good for man to be alone.
I will make a helper suitable for him.
Now the Lord God has formed out of the ground
all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air.
He brought them to the man to see what he would name them
and whatever the man called each living creature,
that's what its name.
That was its name.
So the man gave names to all the livestock,
the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field.
But for Adam, no suitable helper was found.
So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep
and while he was sleeping,
he took one of the man's ribs
and closed up the place with flesh.
Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib
that he had taken out of the man
and he brought her to the man.
The man said,
This is now bones of my bones and flesh of my flesh.
She shall be called woman,
for she was taken out of man.
For this reason,
a man will leave his father and mother
and be united to his wife
and they will become one flesh.
The man and his wife were both naked
and they felt no shame.
Our next reading is in 1 Corinthians 7,
verses 1-9.
And that's from page 1148.
Chapter 7, verses 1-9.
Now for the matters you wrote about.
It is good for a man not to marry.
But since there is so much immorality,
each man should have his own wife
and each woman her own husband.
The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife
and likewise the wife to her husband.
The wife's body does not belong to her alone,
but also to her husband.
In the same way,
the husband's body does not belong to him alone,
but also to his wife.
Do not deprive each other
except by mutual consent and for a time,
so that you may devote yourselves to prayer.
Then come together again
so that Satan will not tempt you
because of your lack of self-control.
I say this as a concession,
not as a command.
I wish that all men were as I am,
but each man has his own gift from God.
One has this gift,
another has that.
Now to the unmarried and the widows,
I say,
it is good for them to stay unmarried as I am.
But if they cannot control themselves,
they should marry,
for it is better to marry
than to burn with passion.
Thank you.
Well, it's getting very hot and spicy, isn't it?
Reading like that.
Well, we need God's help
as we look at his word together.
So have your pens and your paper at the ready
to take notes.
Your Bible's open
and we'll ask God for his help
as we look at this together.
Father, there are many things
that we take for granted in this world,
not least our relationships one to another.
And we see that very often
our relationships one to another
can become distorted
and not what they ought to be.
And so we come this morning
with just a newness
wanting to hear again from you
your design for marriage
and what it's all about.
We pray for your help
for each one of us
to understand clearly
for myself as I speak this message.
and we ask, Father,
that you would pour out
your Holy Spirit upon us
to help us to apply it
and to work it into our lives
so that our marriage is everything
that it ought to be.
And whatever situation
that we find ourselves here this morning,
whether we are married
or whether we are on our own,
we pray, Lord,
that you would speak to us
and show us all
the kind of people
that we should be.
In Jesus' name.
Amen.
So, as we've said
at the very beginning,
this is a series
which we're calling Pure.
And this morning,
we start by looking at
God's design for marriage.
I don't intend to cover
absolutely everything
that the Bible says about marriage.
We have done other talks
from Colossians
and also Ephesians.
And I'm sure you can look
in the website
to get talks on that
or I can give you notes for it.
But here we're going to be looking
at 1 Corinthians 7.
So, marriage,
what's the point?
So, you're married then.
Oh no, I would never get married.
What's the point in that?
We much prefer living together.
It's far less complicated.
Now, 20 years ago,
such a conversation
would have been very rare.
In fact,
it would have been even frowned upon.
Living in sin
was the phrase.
But today,
as we rapidly move
from a conservative
and religious culture
to a more liberal
and irreligious culture,
the opposite we find
is very true.
To talk about getting married
is outdated
and overrated.
Having a partner
or a live-in boyfriend
or girlfriend
is much easier
to deal with.
After all,
you might discover
that you're not suited
to each other.
According to the Iona Institute
for Religion and Society,
in 1986,
there were no figures available
for people
who were cohabiting.
It was so rare.
In 2006,
the number of cohabiting couples
is almost 122,000.
You might think
that's a small number,
but double it
because they're a couple
and you're almost
at a quarter of a million,
which is quite a lot
for our small population.
Marriage
no longer seems
to be a suitable option.
And perhaps the reason
for this is
marriage breakdown
has increased
by 10%
since 1986,
from 40,000
to over 200,000.
In fact,
today,
marital breakdown
stands at 27%.
So marriage
no longer seems
to be a viable
or a stable option.
So people say,
what's the point
of getting married?
It seems
an unnecessary cost.
It's complicated
if things don't work out.
And to be honest,
well,
it suits
if we don't have
any formal ties.
It seems like
there's not a lot
going for marriage
and even Scripture
sends out a warning
to those
who do consider marriage.
Have a look
at 1 Corinthians 7
and the middle
of verse 28.
Do you see it there
in verse 28?
Halfway down
in the verse.
But those
who marry
will face
many troubles
in this life.
And I want
to spare you this.
And all the married
couples are
nodding their head.
So why
bother with marriage?
marriage?
Why don't we all,
as they used to say
in ages past,
let's all live in sin?
Well,
I think we've lost
our way about marriage
and we need to get back
to the designer
of marriage,
the one who created us,
the one who loves us
and who knows
what is best for us.
We need to go back
to God's design
for marriage.
marriage.
And we ask the question,
what marriage is?
Look at verse 1
of chapter 7.
Now for the matters
you wrote about,
it is good for a man
not to marry.
1 Corinthians
is a letter
written to a church
in a culture
that was up to its eyes
in sexual freedom.
People did
whatever they wanted
with whoever
they wanted.
It was a promiscuous
and licentious city
where anything goes,
except,
it seems,
marriage.
The Christians thought,
verse 1,
that it was good
for a person
not to marry.
Or if you look
at the note
in the bottom
of your page,
there's probably
a little A
or something
at the end
of verse 1
and in the note
at the bottom
it says,
it is good for a man
not to have
sexual relations
with a woman.
In other words,
the only way
that they were to live
in such a sex-crazed society
was to live a life
of celibacy
whether you were
single or married.
The Christians thought
it was actually
more spiritual.
It was more holy
to abstain
even if you were married.
And in an attempt
to be counter-cultural,
they went from
one extreme
to the other.
So Paul seems
to address this balance.
He wants to put
things right.
So he says
in verse 2,
but since there is
so much immorality,
each man should have
his own wife
and each woman
her own husband.
In fact,
back in chapter 6,
just a couple of verses
back up,
in verse 16,
he's already referred
to God's good order.
He's actually
for marriage.
It was the people
in the church
who were saying
it wasn't good
for people to marry.
And Paul's trying
to get across
the point that,
yes,
there is a place
for marriage.
marriage.
And in chapter 6,
verse 16,
there he quotes
from Genesis chapter 2,
verse 24,
where he talks
about the two
becoming one flesh.
So what I want us
to do now
is to jump back
into Genesis chapter 2
to get the foundation
of which Paul
builds his whole argument.
So let's go back
to Genesis chapter 2
and verse 20.
Genesis chapter 2
and starting in
at verse 20.
We read there,
But for Adam
no suitable helper
was found.
So the Lord
caused the man
to fall into a deep sleep
and while he was sleeping
he took one of the man's ribs
and closed up the place
with flesh.
Then the Lord God
made a woman
from the rib.
He had taken out
of the man
and he brought her
to the man
and the man said
with his roses
in hands
and his great romance,
this is now
bone of my bones,
flesh of my flesh
and she shall be called
woe man
for she was taken
out of man.
For this reason
a man will leave
his father and mother
and be united
to his wife
and they will become
one flesh.
The man and his wife
were both naked
and they felt
no shame.
So marriage
is part of God's
good design
and order for the world.
It was one of the things
he established
at creation.
It is a gift
to us
but it comes
with special conditions.
We see this
in verses 24.
It is to be exclusive
between a man
and a woman
and not involving
anyone else
or any other partners.
It is also
to be permanent.
They are to leave
their father and mother.
They are not to live in
with their father and mother
but they are to set up
home together
and be united
together.
To be permanent
together.
And it is to be sexual
as they become
one flesh.
A seal of their
commitment
to one another.
Now while all of this
is true
it doesn't tell us
what the real purpose
of marriage is.
If you ask people today
why they get married
you will get a range
of answers.
You will get something
like this
because I love him.
Because I want to spend
the rest of my days
with her.
So I can have sex.
To get legal status
and benefit
from the tax breaks.
Because I am lonely
and needed security.
There are all the reasons
people might give.
But none of those
is the reason
that God gives.
Look at chapter 2
verse 18.
The Lord God said
it is not good
for the man
to be alone.
I will make
a suitable helper
for him.
Now when God
says that
we read it
and we think
poor Adam
he is all alone.
He needs someone
to satisfy
his loneliness.
And that is why
you get married
so that you are
not lonely anymore.
But that is not
what he actually
says is it?
God does not say
I am going to
make a suitable
companion.
No, God says
I am going to
make a suitable
helper.
And it is the same
in verse 20.
In the middle
of verse 20
but for Adam
no suitable
helper was found.
So God did
the rib thing
and he got a woman
and he presented
the woman
before the man
and there became
one flesh.
Now the purpose
for them coming
together
the reason why
God brought
them together
we have to go
back to Genesis
chapter 1
verse 27.
And there we read
in chapter 1
verse 27
God created man
in his own image.
In the image
of God
he created him
male and female.
He created them.
God blessed
them and he said
to them
be fruitful
and increase
in number
fill the earth
and subdue it
rule over the fish
of the sea
and the birds
of the air
and over every
living creature
that moves
on the ground.
So the man
and the woman
were to come
together for the
purpose of being
fruitful
that they would
increase in number
so that they
would have kids.
But that's
not all.
Together
they are to
rule over
the world
in which
they live.
They are to
rule over it.
They are to
care for the
world in which
they live.
They are to
manage it.
Now if Adam
was to do this
on his own
it would be
a pretty big
task wouldn't
it?
He couldn't do
all that work
on his own.
He needed a
helper.
Somebody who
would come
alongside and
help in the
work.
And so
a woman was
provided.
And to be
honest
the man and
woman they
couldn't do
it on their
own either.
They needed
a family.
So God
had said they
were to be
fruitful and
increase.
They were to
have a family
of gardeners
to take care
of God's
good creation.
Now of course
that doesn't
mean that they
all headed off
to university
to become
horticulturalists.
Gardeners is
simply a
metaphor for
serving God
the way that
he has
planned.
Christopher
Ash,
the author,
put it in
his book,
like this.
It's called
Married for
God.
And this is
what he says,
as we rejoice
with the
lovers in
the garden,
we must not
forget that
there is work
to be done.
The garden
needs gardening.
God's world
needs careful
watch and
careful work.
You see,
God's purpose
for marriage
is mission.
This is God's
mission for
his people.
people.
It's not
just to
meet the
need of
loneliness.
It's not
just so
people can
have sex.
It's about
serving God's
greater plan
and purpose.
And as we
look at the
world today,
we see that
over the
centuries,
people have
been fruitful.
The world
has been
populated.
They have
obeyed the
command.
There's now
over 10
billion people
in the
world.
But rather
than gardeners
who care
for the
world,
we've become
vandals,
haven't we?
Mankind
has wrecked
the world
in which we
live.
We don't
take care
of it.
And the
world is
broken,
not just
physically,
but socially.
Marriages
break up,
families fall
apart,
children are
having to
live with
people who
aren't their
parents.
And socially
things are
broken down,
and morally
and spiritually.
And this
is the
world in
which we
live.
And God
has a
purpose for
the marriage
unit in
the context
of all this
mess.
To quote
again from
Christopher
Ash,
he says,
the creator
entrusts to
married couples
the awesome
privilege and
responsibility of
procreating
potential gardeners
to join his
team.
In other
words,
to build a
family.
They are to
work,
to teach,
to discipline
and pray
that they
will grow
up into
adult actual
gardeners who
learn to
love God
and care
for his
world.
So God's
whole design,
his whole
purpose for
marriage is
to be like a
little unit
living under
God's rule
within the
community in
which they
live,
love.
Demonstrating
to the
world and
witnessing to
the world
what it
actually looks
like to
live under
God's care
and under
his rule
and to
express God's
love out
through the
family to
others.
So marriage
is a witness
and a
demonstration of
how we should
live in this
world.
It's all part
of God's
mission and
it is God's
means for
bringing change
and healing
to a broken
and a
hurting world.
So marriage
isn't just
something that's
kind of come
up from
nowhere.
It was God's
design from
the very
beginning to
show people
what it is
to live
orderly and
correctly in
God's world.
So that
kind of looks
at the first
thing, a
definition if
you like,
of what
marriage is.
Which brings
us on to,
well, why
should we
marry?
Why should
we marry?
And we
need to
take all
of what
we've said
so far and
bring it with
us back to
1 Corinthians
chapter 7.
Because that
is the
foundation to
which Paul
builds the
rest of
what he
goes on to
say.
Now while
mission may
be the
primary reason
for marriage,
and I want
to underline
primary,
there is also
a very
practical
reason.
Look at
1 Corinthians
chapter 7
verses 1
and 2.
Now he
said,
for the
matters you
wrote about,
it is good
for a man
not to
marry,
but since
there is so
much immorality,
each man
should have
his own
wife,
and each
woman her
own
husband.
Verse
8.
Now to
the unmarried
and the
widows,
I say,
it is good
for them to
stay unmarried
as I
am,
and we'll
be looking
at that
more next
week.
But if
they cannot
control
themselves,
they should
marry,
for it is
better to
marry than
to burn
with passion.
Now Corinth
was known
for its
sexual freedom
and its
loose
lifestyle.
In fact,
it was so
prominent
that it
had become
integrated
into the
life of
the church.
So have a
look back at
chapter 5,
verse 1.
chapter 5,
verse 1.
It is actually
reported that
there is sexual
immorality among
you, and of a
kind that does
not even occur
even among the
pagans, amongst
those who aren't
Christians.
A man has
his father's
wife.
So somebody's
run off with
his stepmother.
And in
chapter 6,
verse 16.
As quick as
they were to
go off to
the prayer
meeting on
a Wednesday
night,
they were as
quick to run
down to visit
the local
prostitute.
Verse 16 of
chapter 6.
Do you know
that he who
unites himself
with a
prostitute is
one with her
in body?
For it is
said the two
will become
one flesh.
Verse 18.
Flee from
sexual immorality.
So it was an
anything-goes
society,
immorality, and
it was becoming
acceptable within
church life.
And so Paul's
pastoral response
is so very
practical.
Verse 2 of
chapter 7.
Since there is
so much
immorality,
each man should
have his own
wife, and each
woman should have
her own husband.
So he's saying
to them very
clearly, there is
a place for
sexual expression.
But it's not
down in the
local brothel.
And it's not
with your
stepmother.
It's to be
within the
context of
marriage.
Now, listening
here, we may be
trying to relate
all of this to
us, and you
might not be
particularly
attracted to
your stepmother
or stepfather
if you have
one.
And you
might be
visiting the
local brothel.
But we
can't deny
the sexual
temptation that
surrounds us
every day.
Easy access
to internet
porn in the
chat rooms.
Films and
TV programs.
Our culture
is continually
bombarding us,
telling us that
sexual freedom
is good.
It's satisfying
and it's
fulfilling, and
it's okay.
Everybody else
is at it, so
why don't
you?
And the
point is
simply this,
that it's
actually very
hard to
remain very
pure in a
sex-crazed
world.
The sex
drive is
very real,
and when
continually
aroused by
our culture,
and when
it's driven
to the heart
through temptation,
it is very
difficult for
us all,
whoever we
are, to
live rightly.
So to
save and
to help the
poor Christian
who is
trying to
live a
pure life
in this
mad society,
and let's
face it,
our society
is no
different today,
so to
try and
help the
Christian who
is trying to
live a
pure life,
Paul says,
get married.
Look at
verse 9.
But if
they cannot
control
themselves,
if they
can't live
properly,
they should
marry,
for it is
better to
marry than
to burn
with passion.
Now some
of you know
that Kirstie
and I
were met
and engaged
and married
within nine
months,
so it was
quite clear
that Kirstie
was burning
with passion
and she
couldn't keep
away from
me.
But what
Paul is
saying here
in this
is,
look,
don't be
trying to
force people
to remain
single.
Don't be
trying to
force people
to live a
celibate life.
It's not the
way to deal
with it.
We'll look at
this next week,
but he says
there is a
gift for
singleness
and there is
a gift for
getting married.
And he is
saying in a
very practical
way,
that the
sexual
passion
that burns
within us,
the only
place in
which it
is cooled
is within
the context
of marriage.
And it
saves you
from a
life of
brokenness
and a
life of
destruction.
And instead
what happens
within the
marriage unit,
it becomes
the context
for bringing
help and
bringing healing
to a
sexually
disorientated
world.
So he's
being very
practical about
these things.
And I want
to speak,
I suppose,
generally but
specifically to
younger people.
Don't be
following the
ways of the
world.
Sexual freedom
is not good.
It will lead
to all kinds of
difficulties and
all kinds of
hurts and
suffering.
We must
follow God's
good order.
He has
designed the
world the
way it is
and this
is the
right way
to live.
There is a
place for
sexual passion
and that is
only within
the context
of marriage.
But I
suppose as we
look at this,
it does raise
the question,
and we're all
probably wanting
to ask it,
but far too
embarrassed to
ask it,
does that mean
that when I get
married that I
can have sex
whenever I want
to?
Well, I
don't think
that's what
he's saying.
There is a
primary reason
for marriage
and that's
mission,
God's design
and God's
order.
There's a
very practical
reason as
well as we
live in a
very sexual
immoral world
and we have
those struggles
and there's a
way to deal
with it,
but there's
also a way
in which we
should conduct
our marriage.
Look at
verse 3.
The husband
should fulfill
his marital
duty to
his wife
and likewise
the wife
to her
husband.
Now,
contrary to
what many
people think,
and I'm
talking of
people outside
the church,
perhaps even
within the
church as
well,
God is
actually for
sex.
He's not
against it.
It's not a
naughty thing
or a bad
thing.
It's a good
thing.
And if you
want to know
more about
that,
have a read
of Proverbs
chapter 5
or read
through Song
of Solomon
and you
will see
that it
is really
celebrated.
But again,
it is only
to be in
the context
of marriage.
And spouses,
and here I
speak particularly
to spouses,
we have
responsibilities
to each
other,
as he
explains in
verse 4.
Have a look
at verse 4.
The wife
this body
does not
belong to
her alone,
but also
to her
husband.
But he
doesn't stop
there.
There's an
equality.
In the
same way,
the husband's
body does
not belong
to him
alone,
but also
to his
wife.
Now,
what he's
talking about
here is,
I'm calling
mutual
submission
and service.
Now,
before you
all come
down on
me like
a ton
of bricks,
let me
try to
explain and
work this
one out.
Our
culture
views
sexual
activity
as all
about
fulfilling
my needs
and my
wants.
It's all
very me
centered.
It says
get what
you can
when you
can.
You
treat the
person
however you
like to
satisfy your
own needs.
So the
person who
you are
with is
just simply
treated as
an object,
a means of
gratification.
And what
that does
is it
just degrades
people.
It destroys
who they
are.
It creates
fear and
it creates
mistrust.
That's the
way in which
the world
operates.
But that's
not the
way it
has to
be with
marriage.
In
marriage,
it's about
submission.
You don't
take from
the other
person.
You give
to the
other
person.
You don't
demand from
your wife.
You seek
their good.
You don't
force something
from your
husband.
You want
their best.
Your body,
when you get
married,
when we
looked at
Genesis,
the two
become one
flesh.
When you
come together,
and as it
says here in
verse 4,
your body
doesn't
belong to
you alone
anymore.
It belongs
also to
the other.
And that
means that
it's not
about your
rights and
what you
want,
but it's
about their
rights and
what they
need.
So within
the context
of marriage,
you are
submitting
yourself to
the other
person.
in
marriage,
you are
entrusting
yourself,
and it
is a
trust
exercise
in coming
to be
married,
you are
entrusting
yourself
into the
loving care
because you
know that
you are
going to
be treated
sensitively,
carefully,
and lovingly.
So
submission is
a mutual
submission,
one to
the other.
In
summary,
we could
put it like
this,
that sexual
expression,
sexual
expression
within the
marriage,
should never
be demanded,
and it
should never
be withheld.
Now that's
all he says
about that
in these
verses.
It doesn't
say how
often,
how much,
and that's
for each
couple here
to work out
for themselves,
and that
will be
different
for every
couple.
And they've
got to
work that
out within
a loving
and caring
relationship.
But the
first thing
is mutual
submission.
Not about
your rights,
but their
rights.
But it's
not just
mutual
submission,
there's also
to be
mutual
agreement.
Look at
verse 5.
Do not
deprive
each other
except by
mutual
consent
and for
a time,
so that
you may
devote
yourselves
to prayer.
Then come
together again
so that
Satan will
not tempt
you because
your lack
of self-control.
Now,
I just
find scripture
so practical,
isn't it?
There are
times when
the married
couple need
to put
everything
else to
one side
and give
themselves
not to
each other
but to
prayer.
And the
prayer life
of a
married
couple
is crucial
and time
needs to
be given
to pray
for specific
needs,
not least
for the
marriage
itself
and for
the
family.
And once
again,
as it
was in
verse 4,
this isn't
to be
forced
or demanded,
but it
is to be
agreed upon.
There is
to be
mutual
consent.
Now,
when I was
reading through
this,
I found
it a
real
challenge.
When was
the last
time,
and I
speak again
to married
couples,
when was
the last
time that
you took
time out
to pray
together
as husband
and wife?
When did
you last
do that?
Can you
remember?
I
think there's
a real
imbalance
in our
lives.
People
will rush
to the
counselor
because their
sex life
is in
trouble,
but you
ever hear
of people
rushing to
their pastor
or to
somebody
else because
their prayer
life is
in trouble?
there are
times when
we have
to kneel
beside the
bed instead
of jumping
into the
bed.
And I
want to
encourage us
to think
about what
it is to
pray together
as couples.
You need
to plan.
I need
to plan.
to take
time out
with my
wife.
To pray
together.
To pray
for your
children if
you have
children.
To pray
not only
that they
would have
a great
career and
they'd be
very healthy
and successful,
but ultimately
that your
children would
come to
love God
and follow
God.
That they
would become
people who
would example
what a
marriage is
meant to
look like.
I had
parents who
prayed for
me in
that way.
Right from
the very
beginning,
if it was
God's will,
they prayed
that I
would have
a wife.
And the
first day
that I
brought
Kirstie
back home,
in a very
embarrassing
way,
my mother
said,
oh,
you're the
one we've
been praying
for.
How
embarrassing
was that?
Anyway,
thanks,
mum.
She still
stayed with
me.
It was
Kirstie,
by the way.
Although she
called her
by the
wrong name,
she called
her Denise
instead of
Kirstie.
I'll tell
you about
Denise
another day.
But the
point is
that marriage
is good.
Marriage is
important.
Sorry,
prayer is
important.
And we
need to
conduct that
rightfully and
in the proper
place within
marriage.
But,
and there's
a big but
there in
verse 5,
never
use prayer
as an
excuse
for
withholding
yourself
from your
spouse.
So,
none of
this,
sorry dear,
can we
pray again
tonight.
Look at
what it
says at
the end
of verse
5.
Come
together
again
so that
Satan
will not
tempt
you
because of
your lack
of self
control.
he is
just so
practical.
There are
enough
temptations
outside of
marriage,
there are
enough
things
bombarding
us.
Marriages
are under
so much
pressure
that married
people should
live in such
a way that
they don't
give Satan
a chance
to ruin
and destroy
the marriage
relationship.
So,
there is
to be
mutual
submission
and there
is to
be
mutual
agreement.
Which
brings us
to,
I suppose,
our summary,
the point
of marriage.
Look at
verse 6.
He says,
I say
this as
a concession,
not as
a command.
I wish
that all
men were
as I am,
but each
man has
his own
gift from
God.
One has
this gift
and another
has that.
Marriage
is a gift
from God.
It's a
wonderful gift
from God.
And we
will see
that next
week that
singleness
is also
a gift
from God.
And what
is said
here in
these few
verses of
chapter 7
is practical
advice for
those who
do get
married.
So,
when we
look at
verse 6,
it says,
I say
this as a
concession,
not as
a command.
Paul is
not
commanding
that
everybody
gets
married.
He's
not
saying
this is
what
you
all
have
to
do.
And he
is not
commanding
that
everybody
has to
stay
single.
But for
those who
are married,
for those
who are
going to
get married,
this is
what it
looks like.
And we
need to
spend time
reading through
the passages
in Scripture
that tell us
about marriage
because sadly
many marriages
do break
down and
the Christian
marriage is
not immune
to the
pressures.
Kirsty and I
are only married
still only a few
years,
but many of
our friends,
or quite a few,
some of those we
were in college
with,
their marriages
are no longer
together.
And very often
the reason is
because people
begin to look
outside of
their marriage,
they look
outside of
their spouse
to meet
their own
selfish needs,
whether through
affairs,
or through
porn,
or through
some other
means.
And God's
word here
gives us
some very
clear direction
to those
who are
married.
And if we
follow it,
it will
bring unity,
it will
deepen
trust and
oneness.
It will
strengthen
the relationship.
And the
stronger the
marriage is,
the more at
one together
we are going
to be,
and the
better position
we are going
to be in
to serve
God's
ultimate
purpose.
And I
want to
finish with
this,
because this
is God's
ultimate
purpose.
Marriage
is
mission.
God has
brought you
together in
his plan
and in
his design,
and if you
have children,
God has
blessed you
with children.
And he
is saying
to you,
I want
your marriage
unit to
be a light,
to be a
witness.
Your
marriage is
to be a
means of
bringing
healing to
a broken
world.
And just
as much
as through
the marriage
unit,
God can
bring healing
to a broken
world,
marriages.
God can
also,
by his
grace,
bring healing
to broken
marriages.
God can
help.
God can
restore.
Having
difficulties
and having
struggles
is not
uncommon.
It's
normal.
That's why
he said
in verse
28,
those who
marry will
face many
troubles.
And I
want to
spare you
this.
So if
you find
you are
going
through
struggles
and you
are going
through
difficulties,
don't hide
it.
Speak to
somebody.
Come and
speak to
me.
Come and
speak to
Kirsty.
Go and
talk to
an older
Christian
that you
know.
Because if
our marriages
are breaking,
we can
heal no
one.
First of
all, we
must get
ourselves
right.
So,
this is
God's
design for
marriage.
It is
foundational.
He set it
out at
creation.
And it is
very practical
and it
needs to
be worked
on.
So I
encourage us
all to
think through
these things
more.
Talk it
through with
your spouse,
with your
husband and
with your
wife.
Seek to
encourage your
children in
the way that
they should
go.
Let's pray
together.
God, we
thank you so
much that you
don't leave
us alone.
You don't
just put us
into this
world and
tell us now
you just
make the
best job
that you
can.
but that
you have
given us
your commands
and your
direction as
to how we
should live,
particularly
within marriage.
Again,
Father, we
pray that you
would protect
every marriage
represented here.
Make it
strong and
make it
healthy.
May it be a
witness and a
demonstration of
your love.
may it be a
mission within
the community
where they
live.
We pray,
Father, too,
that if there
is any marriage
that is
struggling or
finding it
difficult at
this time,
we pray that
you would pour
out your
grace,
that you
would enable
them to find
the help and
the support.
And we pray
for each one
of us here,
whatever situation
we find
ourselves in,
whether we're
looking forward
to marriage,
whether we're
looking back
on marriage,
that all of
us would pray
for one another,
pray for the
strengthening of
the relationships,
seeking purity
in every way.
And we ask,
Lord, that we
would ever come
to you and
find the
forgiveness that
we need for
where we get
it wrong.
Please forgive
us and help
us to follow
your pure and
good design.
In Jesus'
name,
Amen.
we're going to
sing together.
Amen.
This song reminds
us of the love
of Jesus towards
us.
Amen.