WEBVTT

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 The scripture reading comes from Genesis 1 and Matthew 19.

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 Please follow along on the screen, the bulletin of your own Bible.

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 Starting in verses Genesis 1, 26, we read,

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 Then God said,

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 Let us make men in our image, after our likeness,

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 and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea,

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 and over the birds of the heavens,

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 and over the livestock, and over all the earth,

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 and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.

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 So God created men in his own image.

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 In the image of God he created him.

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 Male and female he created them.

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 And God blessed them.

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 And God said to them,

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 Be fruitful, and multiply,

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 and fill the earth and subdue it,

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 and have dominion over the fish of the sea,

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 and over the birds of the heavens,

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 and over every living thing that moves on the earth.

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 Then in Matthew 19, 3, we read,

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 And Pharisees came up to him and test him by asking,

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 Is it lawful to divorce one's wife for any cause?

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 He answered,

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 Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female,

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 and said,

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 Therefore, a man shall leave his father and his mother,

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 and hold fast to his wife,

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 and the two shall become one flesh.

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 So they are no longer two, but one flesh.

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 Whatever God has joined together,

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 let not men separate.

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 This is the word of God.

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 Thank you, Nikki.

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 Well, everybody, it is wonderful to be back with you.

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 It's great to see a couple of faces we haven't seen for a while.

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 And if you are new to Watermark, my name is Kevin, one of the leaders here.

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 It's really great to have you with us this morning.

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 Will you join me?

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 Let's pray together as we dive into this.

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 So let's pray.

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 Father, as we come to your word this morning,

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 like we do every week,

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 we come to your word because we want to hear from you.

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 We want to hear the life-giving word of the living God speaking to our souls.

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 Father, we don't come to church just to hear some interesting advice or some humanistic wisdom.

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 God, we've come to the ancient of days, God,

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 the one who has existed from eternity and whose ways are perfect,

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 who, as we sang about earlier,

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 whose law is perfect, who revives our souls.

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 And so this morning as we come to your word,

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 we do pray that you will revive our souls.

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 We pray, God, that as we look at this subject of marriage and relationships,

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 that you will revive our marriages.

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 God, we come this morning not because we're perfect or we have it together.

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 It's so tempting to come to church with a brave face

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 and to act like we have it together.

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 God, the reality is all of us need your grace.

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 And so this morning come and flood us with your grace.

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 Flood us with your mercy.

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 God, for those of us that carry shame,

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 flood us with your grace, we pray this morning.

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 God, won't you call us back to yourself?

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 Help us to fix our eyes on you, the living God.

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 God, this morning as we think about the subject of marriage and relationships and family,

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 we bring our city before you.

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 This wonderful city of Hong Kong that we love so much

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 and yet which carries so much pain in the area of family and homes.

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 God, won't you come and heal our city?

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 Won't you come and heal the families in our city?

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 Won't you come and heal and restore relationships?

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 God, we pray.

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 God, may your church and followers of Jesus be a light in this city

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 and be an agent of hope and healing in this world, we pray.

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 And so come and start off by doing a work in our own hearts, Lord.

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 Come and revive us.

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 Come and heal us, Lord God, and help us and send us out to be agents of grace in this city.

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 We pray this, Christ, in your wonderful and your very faithful name.

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 Amen.

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 Amen.

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 When I was about nine or ten years old, somewhere around there,

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 my family was on holiday at my grandparents' house,

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 which is on the southern coast of South Africa,

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 in a town called Port Elizabeth.

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 And it was Christmas Day,

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 and normally it's summertime in the southern hemisphere of Christmas,

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 but this day was miserable.

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 It was cold and windy and wet and rainy,

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 and it wasn't a great day.

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 The afternoon, it cleared up a little bit,

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 but my family decided to go to the beach and fly some kites.

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 And so I went down to the beach to fly the kites,

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 but because it was such a miserable day,

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 there was no one else on the beach.

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 We were the only family there.

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 But after a while, I got bored with flying kites,

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 and so I said to my dad,

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 I'm going to go swim in the sea.

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 And so my dad said,

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 just be careful, but okay, I'm watching you.

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 And because it was such a miserable day,

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 the waves were a bit more rough than usual,

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 and the lifeguards had decided,

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 listen, there's no one swimming,

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 we can pack up and go home.

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 And so I'm in the sea, I'm swimming a little bit,

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 but what I didn't realize was there's a rip current

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 that was pulling me out.

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 And by the time I realized this,

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 I was too far gone,

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 and I wasn't strong enough to swim back to shore.

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 Fortunately, my dad was on the shore

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 and could see what was happening.

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 And so he ran up to the car park,

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 and he found the last lifeguard

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 was getting in his car on his way home.

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 And my dad got his attention,

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 and the guy ran down to the beach,

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 and suffice to say, he did his job fairly well, right?

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 I'm still standing here today.

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 Now, I tell you that story

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 because we're starting a series today

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 called Gender, Sex, Relationships, and God.

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 And we're going to be looking over the next five or six weeks

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 at these big topics and areas of life.

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 And the reason why we're doing this

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 is because as citizens in our city in which we live,

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 we live in a culture which is changing so quickly

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 and so ferociously in a way

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 that as we live our lives,

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 we don't realize some of the currents that we're swimming in.

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 I don't think we do it in Hong Kong,

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 at least I haven't seen it yet,

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 but in many other countries around the world,

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 the lifeguards will put flags up in the sand,

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 and they'll tell you,

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 listen, swim between these flags, right?

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 If you swim outside of these flags,

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 there are currents out there,

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 and you can find yourself in danger

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 in a difficult water.

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 But if you stay within these flagpoles,

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 that's a safe area to swim.

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 And in some ways,

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 what we want to do in this series

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 is we want to raise the flag again

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 and say,

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 what does God have to say

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 about these really important areas of life

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 so that we don't find ourselves

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 being swept away by the currents of our culture

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 and we find ourselves in difficult waters?

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 Okay?

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 Sorry.

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 Now, just, by the way,

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 we have this book called

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 The Meaning of Marriage.

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 There's a bunch of them here

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 and there's some outside.

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 This morning,

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 we're going to be talking about marriage.

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 And next week,

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 we're going to talk about sex.

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 The week after that,

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 we're going to talk about cohabitation,

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 living together outside of marriage.

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 The week after that,

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 we're going to talk about transgender

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 and gender issues.

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 And then the week after that,

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 we're going to talk about singleness.

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 Okay?

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 So that's where we're going.

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 This is one of the best books

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 you could ever read on marriage.

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 It's by Tim and Kathy Keller

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 from New York City.

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 I'll encourage you to get it

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 and read it if you haven't.

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 It's $100.

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 There's a bunch of copies here

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 or outside.

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 If you haven't,

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 just grab a copy,

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 drop $100 in the box.

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 I want to encourage you

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 to read that book.

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 Okay.

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 So let's think about marriage.

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 As society has become

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 more secularistic

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 in our worldview

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 and our ideology

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 and our thinking,

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 this has changed many things.

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 And one of the impact,

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 one of the areas it's impacted

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 is the way we view relationships

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 and marriage.

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 And so what is it

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 that our worldview,

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 our culture,

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 how do we think about marriage today?

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 Well, one of the things

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 that's happened

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 is we think of marriage

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 and relationships

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 as personal gratification.

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 It's about me

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 and what I can get out of it.

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 We approach relationships

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 to the viewpoint

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 of how is this relationship

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 going to add

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 or benefit my life?

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 How will this complete me?

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 Many people approach marriage

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 thinking this will fill

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 the void in my heart.

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 This will complete me.

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 And so we approach it

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 from a worldview

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 of personal gratification.

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 We also tend to think

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 of it, our culture,

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 thinks of marriage

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 and relationships

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 in very sentimental values

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 or sentimental terms.

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 So when I first started

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 officiating weddings

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 as a pastor

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 many years ago,

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 I would allow couples

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 to write their own vows.

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 Claire and I wrote

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 our own vows

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 and I thought,

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 this is a good idea.

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 But I quickly changed my mind.

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 And the reason is

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 because couples

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 would write their vows

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 but their vows

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 would be more

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 of a description

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 of how you make me feel

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 rather than a commitment

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 or vow of love, right?

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 So you get people

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 standing up

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 and saying things like,

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 you are the salmon

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 on my sushi roll,

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 you are the Nutella

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 on my bagel, you know.

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 And so I quickly

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 abandoned that idea

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 and said, no, no,

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 I'm going to give you

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 a proper vow to say.

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 You say,

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 for better or for worse,

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 richer or poorer,

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 that's a proper vow, right?

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 And so some of you,

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 I know,

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 are getting married soon.

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 Z and Helen

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 and Justin and Annabelle,

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 just a warning,

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 if you want to be involved

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 in your wedding,

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 there's not going to be

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 any Nutella

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 on your bagel

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 in the vows, okay?

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 But we tend to think

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 of marriage

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 and love

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 in very sentimental terms,

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 right?

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 There's this euphoric

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 kind of feeling

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 of sentimentality.

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 We also tend to think

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 of a good marriage

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 or relationship

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 is based on compatibility.

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 So two people

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 come together

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 and they've got

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 similar backgrounds,

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 similar culture,

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 they are emotionally

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 or financially,

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 even sexually compatible,

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 and if you can work out

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 how compatible you are,

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 you have the same

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 kind of socioeconomic class,

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 then we feel like,

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 okay,

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 this is going to be

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 a good marriage,

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 this is going to work.

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 And so that's kind

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 of the sentimental side.

00:10:22.059 --> 00:10:23.019
 On the other side,

00:10:23.139 --> 00:10:24.239
 we can think of relationships

00:10:24.239 --> 00:10:25.579
 very pragmatically.

00:10:26.379 --> 00:10:26.899
 And so sometimes

00:10:26.899 --> 00:10:28.799
 people approach relationships

00:10:28.799 --> 00:10:30.519
 with a viewpoint of

00:10:30.519 --> 00:10:31.879
 this is a human partnership,

00:10:32.099 --> 00:10:32.339
 right?

00:10:32.759 --> 00:10:33.399
 And so we've both

00:10:33.399 --> 00:10:34.179
 got a contribution

00:10:34.179 --> 00:10:34.559
 to bring,

00:10:34.659 --> 00:10:35.459
 you've got a contribution,

00:10:35.659 --> 00:10:36.619
 I've got a contribution.

00:10:37.119 --> 00:10:38.419
 If we come together,

00:10:38.859 --> 00:10:39.779
 this partnership

00:10:39.779 --> 00:10:40.759
 can work well

00:10:40.759 --> 00:10:41.559
 and together

00:10:41.559 --> 00:10:42.659
 the sum of our parts

00:10:42.659 --> 00:10:45.479
 will be something better

00:10:45.479 --> 00:10:46.539
 than we will individually.

00:10:47.919 --> 00:10:48.739
 And so one article

00:10:48.739 --> 00:10:49.959
 in the Harvard Journal

00:10:49.959 --> 00:10:51.859
 for Law and Public Policy

00:10:51.860 --> 00:10:52.379
 entitled,

00:10:52.639 --> 00:10:53.480
 What is Marriage?

00:10:53.740 --> 00:10:54.580
 summarized our kind

00:10:54.580 --> 00:10:55.440
 of modern view

00:10:55.440 --> 00:10:56.320
 like this.

00:10:56.379 --> 00:10:56.659
 It says,

00:10:57.220 --> 00:10:58.039
 we see marriage

00:10:58.039 --> 00:10:58.840
 as the union

00:10:58.840 --> 00:11:00.259
 of any two people

00:11:00.259 --> 00:11:02.100
 who commit to romantically

00:11:02.100 --> 00:11:03.820
 love and care for each other

00:11:03.820 --> 00:11:05.960
 and to share the burdens

00:11:05.960 --> 00:11:06.960
 and the benefits

00:11:06.960 --> 00:11:08.120
 of domestic life.

00:11:08.379 --> 00:11:08.519
 Okay,

00:11:08.539 --> 00:11:09.600
 that really sums it up.

00:11:09.659 --> 00:11:10.519
 Two people who commit

00:11:10.519 --> 00:11:11.500
 to romantically love

00:11:11.500 --> 00:11:12.259
 and care for each other

00:11:12.259 --> 00:11:13.779
 and share the burdens

00:11:13.779 --> 00:11:14.740
 and the benefits

00:11:14.740 --> 00:11:15.960
 of domestic life.

00:11:16.440 --> 00:11:17.300
 It's essentially

00:11:17.300 --> 00:11:18.560
 a union of hearts

00:11:18.560 --> 00:11:19.180
 and minds

00:11:19.180 --> 00:11:20.000
 and hands

00:11:20.000 --> 00:11:21.080
 enhanced

00:11:21.080 --> 00:11:22.480
 by whatever forms

00:11:22.480 --> 00:11:23.340
 of sexual intimacy

00:11:23.340 --> 00:11:24.279
 both partners

00:11:24.279 --> 00:11:25.419
 find agreeable.

00:11:26.940 --> 00:11:27.580
 And so what's happened

00:11:27.580 --> 00:11:28.460
 is as we've become

00:11:28.460 --> 00:11:29.679
 more secularistic

00:11:29.679 --> 00:11:31.639
 and more in our worldview

00:11:31.639 --> 00:11:32.259
 and our thinking,

00:11:32.620 --> 00:11:34.279
 as we've removed God

00:11:34.279 --> 00:11:35.039
 from the center

00:11:35.039 --> 00:11:36.059
 of our equation,

00:11:36.700 --> 00:11:37.480
 what's happened

00:11:37.480 --> 00:11:38.240
 is that we find

00:11:38.240 --> 00:11:39.639
 two major shifts

00:11:39.639 --> 00:11:40.500
 have taken place

00:11:40.500 --> 00:11:40.820
 in the way

00:11:40.820 --> 00:11:41.299
 that we think

00:11:41.299 --> 00:11:42.139
 about relationships

00:11:42.139 --> 00:11:42.799
 and marriage.

00:11:43.419 --> 00:11:44.460
 And this is summed up

00:11:44.460 --> 00:11:45.440
 so brilliantly

00:11:45.440 --> 00:11:46.019
 in a book

00:11:46.019 --> 00:11:47.059
 called Divine Sex

00:11:47.059 --> 00:11:48.699
 by Jonathan Grant

00:11:48.699 --> 00:11:49.479
 and James Smith.

00:11:50.059 --> 00:11:50.759
 And what they say

00:11:50.759 --> 00:11:51.079
 is this,

00:11:51.119 --> 00:11:51.699
 that essentially

00:11:51.699 --> 00:11:53.019
 as we've removed God

00:11:53.019 --> 00:11:53.699
 from the center

00:11:53.699 --> 00:11:54.699
 of our worldview,

00:11:55.139 --> 00:11:56.599
 we've necessarily

00:11:56.599 --> 00:11:57.919
 become more self-focused.

00:11:58.199 --> 00:11:59.459
 So we define relationships

00:11:59.459 --> 00:12:00.379
 and particularly marriage

00:12:00.379 --> 00:12:01.459
 in terms of myself

00:12:01.459 --> 00:12:02.699
 and how does this benefit me.

00:12:03.419 --> 00:12:04.059
 And secondly,

00:12:04.599 --> 00:12:06.359
 we necessarily deify

00:12:06.359 --> 00:12:08.259
 or idolize our partners.

00:12:08.739 --> 00:12:09.959
 So we look to our partners

00:12:09.959 --> 00:12:10.859
 and ask them

00:12:10.859 --> 00:12:11.679
 to satisfy

00:12:11.679 --> 00:12:13.179
 or do something for us

00:12:13.179 --> 00:12:13.939
 that historically

00:12:13.939 --> 00:12:14.559
 we realized

00:12:14.559 --> 00:12:15.459
 only God could do.

00:12:15.460 --> 00:12:16.900
 Listen to how

00:12:16.900 --> 00:12:17.680
 they describe it.

00:12:17.740 --> 00:12:18.840
 Now it's quite a long quote

00:12:18.840 --> 00:12:19.480
 so you're going to need

00:12:19.480 --> 00:12:20.000
 to bear with me

00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:20.740
 but I think

00:12:20.740 --> 00:12:21.800
 this sums it up

00:12:21.800 --> 00:12:22.300
 really well.

00:12:22.900 --> 00:12:23.720
 They say this,

00:12:24.160 --> 00:12:25.300
 because of our cultures

00:12:25.300 --> 00:12:26.320
 move away

00:12:26.320 --> 00:12:27.600
 from a belief in God

00:12:27.600 --> 00:12:29.040
 as the source of reality,

00:12:29.759 --> 00:12:30.960
 we've come to place

00:12:30.960 --> 00:12:31.920
 the full weight

00:12:31.920 --> 00:12:32.780
 of our identity

00:12:32.780 --> 00:12:33.780
 and our hopes

00:12:33.780 --> 00:12:35.040
 on the material

00:12:35.040 --> 00:12:36.420
 here in our existence.

00:12:37.060 --> 00:12:37.960
 Rather than becoming

00:12:37.960 --> 00:12:39.400
 free and expansive

00:12:39.400 --> 00:12:40.340
 and generous,

00:12:41.019 --> 00:12:41.840
 our relationships

00:12:41.840 --> 00:12:42.940
 have become narrow

00:12:42.940 --> 00:12:43.860
 and constrained,

00:12:43.860 --> 00:12:45.899
 having very little purpose

00:12:45.899 --> 00:12:47.039
 beyond themselves.

00:12:47.879 --> 00:12:48.019
 Okay,

00:12:48.080 --> 00:12:49.460
 that's a very important point.

00:12:50.220 --> 00:12:51.419
 This exclusive focus

00:12:51.419 --> 00:12:52.519
 has seismically

00:12:52.519 --> 00:12:53.440
 destabilized

00:12:53.440 --> 00:12:54.060
 our relationships

00:12:54.060 --> 00:12:54.779
 in two ways.

00:12:55.279 --> 00:12:55.639
 One,

00:12:56.100 --> 00:12:57.300
 the burden they bear

00:12:57.300 --> 00:12:58.480
 becomes overwhelming

00:12:58.480 --> 00:13:00.320
 because of the expectation

00:13:00.320 --> 00:13:01.600
 that all of our needs,

00:13:01.759 --> 00:13:02.159
 psychological,

00:13:02.620 --> 00:13:03.060
 emotional,

00:13:03.200 --> 00:13:03.600
 material,

00:13:03.759 --> 00:13:04.360
 sexual needs,

00:13:04.360 --> 00:13:05.159
 will be met

00:13:05.159 --> 00:13:07.279
 by one remarkable soulmate.

00:13:08.180 --> 00:13:08.620
 And two,

00:13:09.039 --> 00:13:10.120
 the very bond

00:13:10.120 --> 00:13:11.180
 that we crave

00:13:11.179 --> 00:13:12.759
 is now undermined

00:13:12.759 --> 00:13:14.539
 by the inwardly focused nature

00:13:14.539 --> 00:13:15.799
 of our desire

00:13:15.799 --> 00:13:16.939
 for the authentic self.

00:13:17.620 --> 00:13:19.000
 We do not so much

00:13:19.000 --> 00:13:19.759
 give ourselves

00:13:19.759 --> 00:13:20.699
 to a relationship

00:13:20.699 --> 00:13:22.439
 as expect the relationship

00:13:22.439 --> 00:13:24.000
 to give itself to us.

00:13:24.679 --> 00:13:26.239
 Our most intimate relationships

00:13:26.239 --> 00:13:26.899
 are looked to

00:13:26.899 --> 00:13:27.819
 by each partner

00:13:27.819 --> 00:13:29.319
 as a primary source

00:13:29.319 --> 00:13:29.939
 of happiness

00:13:29.939 --> 00:13:31.319
 and self-fulfillment

00:13:31.319 --> 00:13:32.199
 or actualization.

00:13:32.739 --> 00:13:34.120
 Am I getting what I need

00:13:34.120 --> 00:13:35.019
 from this relationship?

00:13:35.479 --> 00:13:36.859
 Does it make me happy?

00:13:37.339 --> 00:13:38.259
 Do the benefits

00:13:38.259 --> 00:13:39.559
 outweigh the costs?

00:13:40.259 --> 00:13:40.439
 Okay?

00:13:41.119 --> 00:13:41.599
 So do you see

00:13:41.599 --> 00:13:42.239
 what they're saying there?

00:13:42.339 --> 00:13:43.979
 As we've removed God

00:13:43.979 --> 00:13:45.099
 from the center of the equation,

00:13:45.839 --> 00:13:46.259
 fundamentally

00:13:46.259 --> 00:13:47.239
 these two things have happened.

00:13:47.339 --> 00:13:49.019
 We've become inward focused

00:13:49.019 --> 00:13:50.479
 and focused on ourselves

00:13:50.479 --> 00:13:51.699
 and we've put

00:13:51.699 --> 00:13:52.819
 this undue burden

00:13:52.819 --> 00:13:53.359
 and pressure

00:13:53.359 --> 00:13:54.379
 on the other partner

00:13:54.379 --> 00:13:55.379
 to satisfy us

00:13:55.379 --> 00:13:55.979
 and to give us

00:13:55.979 --> 00:13:56.599
 what historically

00:13:56.599 --> 00:13:58.279
 only God could give us.

00:13:58.959 --> 00:13:59.719
 And what they

00:13:59.719 --> 00:14:01.459
 so brilliantly explain

00:14:01.459 --> 00:14:03.339
 is that when we remove

00:14:03.339 --> 00:14:04.259
 God from the equation,

00:14:04.799 --> 00:14:05.539
 actually we form

00:14:05.539 --> 00:14:06.399
 this kind of bubble,

00:14:06.519 --> 00:14:06.699
 you know,

00:14:06.759 --> 00:14:07.799
 like market bubbles,

00:14:07.899 --> 00:14:08.079
 right?

00:14:08.139 --> 00:14:09.199
 When there's a lot of hype

00:14:09.200 --> 00:14:10.140
 but there's no substance

00:14:10.140 --> 00:14:11.820
 to underpin that hype.

00:14:12.360 --> 00:14:13.280
 In the same way,

00:14:13.600 --> 00:14:14.140
 the worldview

00:14:14.140 --> 00:14:15.060
 that's removed God

00:14:15.060 --> 00:14:16.160
 from the center of the equation

00:14:16.160 --> 00:14:18.100
 actually falls in on itself.

00:14:18.220 --> 00:14:19.280
 It cannot sustain

00:14:19.280 --> 00:14:20.000
 the hype

00:14:20.000 --> 00:14:20.960
 and the pressure

00:14:20.960 --> 00:14:22.080
 that we put upon it.

00:14:22.780 --> 00:14:23.560
 Augustine famously

00:14:23.560 --> 00:14:24.400
 said it like this,

00:14:24.860 --> 00:14:26.740
 in turning away from God,

00:14:26.940 --> 00:14:28.460
 we have intrinsically

00:14:28.460 --> 00:14:29.879
 turned in on ourselves.

00:14:30.600 --> 00:14:32.259
 But as we all know

00:14:32.259 --> 00:14:33.640
 that as we do that,

00:14:34.160 --> 00:14:35.060
 the self-focus

00:14:35.060 --> 00:14:36.040
 and self-absorption

00:14:36.039 --> 00:14:37.279
 is the very death

00:14:37.279 --> 00:14:38.379
 of any relationship

00:14:38.379 --> 00:14:39.959
 because the relationship

00:14:39.959 --> 00:14:40.679
 cannot handle

00:14:40.679 --> 00:14:41.360
 the pressure

00:14:41.360 --> 00:14:42.679
 that we put on it.

00:14:44.120 --> 00:14:45.179
 And so the consequences

00:14:45.179 --> 00:14:45.679
 of this

00:14:45.679 --> 00:14:46.799
 are devastating.

00:14:47.539 --> 00:14:48.699
 Someone put it like this,

00:14:48.819 --> 00:14:49.639
 to be lonely

00:14:49.639 --> 00:14:50.539
 is difficult,

00:14:50.980 --> 00:14:51.879
 to be married

00:14:51.879 --> 00:14:52.480
 and lonely

00:14:52.480 --> 00:14:53.839
 is utterly devastating.

00:14:54.980 --> 00:14:55.779
 And there are

00:14:55.779 --> 00:14:57.319
 tens of thousands,

00:14:57.579 --> 00:14:58.240
 millions of people

00:14:58.240 --> 00:14:58.860
 around the world

00:14:58.860 --> 00:15:00.099
 that are married

00:15:00.099 --> 00:15:01.139
 and utterly lonely

00:15:01.139 --> 00:15:01.959
 because they went

00:15:01.959 --> 00:15:02.480
 into marriage

00:15:02.480 --> 00:15:02.879
 thinking,

00:15:02.879 --> 00:15:03.620
 this person

00:15:03.620 --> 00:15:04.000
 is going to

00:15:04.000 --> 00:15:04.399
 fool me

00:15:04.399 --> 00:15:05.279
 and complete me

00:15:05.279 --> 00:15:07.240
 and their marriage

00:15:07.240 --> 00:15:07.720
 is not able

00:15:07.720 --> 00:15:08.639
 to live up to the hype

00:15:08.639 --> 00:15:09.639
 that we place on it.

00:15:11.299 --> 00:15:12.019
 We've traded

00:15:12.019 --> 00:15:13.419
 God's profound vision

00:15:13.419 --> 00:15:14.159
 for marriage

00:15:14.159 --> 00:15:15.439
 for cheap counterfeits

00:15:15.439 --> 00:15:16.500
 and we're left wondering

00:15:16.500 --> 00:15:17.480
 why it doesn't last,

00:15:17.639 --> 00:15:18.480
 why it doesn't satisfy.

00:15:19.700 --> 00:15:20.460
 Now in the book

00:15:20.460 --> 00:15:20.939
 of Jeremiah,

00:15:21.080 --> 00:15:21.639
 chapter 6,

00:15:21.720 --> 00:15:22.679
 there's this amazing verse.

00:15:22.759 --> 00:15:23.379
 I know we've spoken

00:15:23.379 --> 00:15:24.299
 about it quite a lot.

00:15:25.019 --> 00:15:26.200
 Jeremiah says this,

00:15:26.200 --> 00:15:28.180
 stand at the crossroads

00:15:28.180 --> 00:15:28.680
 and look,

00:15:29.320 --> 00:15:31.060
 ask for the ancient parts

00:15:31.060 --> 00:15:33.000
 where the good way is

00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:33.780
 and walk in it

00:15:33.780 --> 00:15:35.240
 and you will find rest

00:15:35.240 --> 00:15:36.320
 for your souls.

00:15:37.920 --> 00:15:39.580
 Ask for the ancient parts.

00:15:40.340 --> 00:15:41.280
 And so over and against

00:15:41.280 --> 00:15:41.980
 the secular

00:15:41.980 --> 00:15:43.180
 and exhausting view

00:15:43.180 --> 00:15:43.820
 of relationships

00:15:43.820 --> 00:15:44.440
 and marriage

00:15:44.440 --> 00:15:45.520
 and life and sexuality,

00:15:46.220 --> 00:15:47.220
 God invites us

00:15:47.220 --> 00:15:47.800
 to come back

00:15:47.800 --> 00:15:48.920
 to the ancient parts,

00:15:49.340 --> 00:15:50.120
 to the ways

00:15:50.120 --> 00:15:51.200
 of the ancient of days

00:15:51.200 --> 00:15:52.160
 and to find

00:15:52.160 --> 00:15:53.920
 what he has to say

00:15:53.920 --> 00:15:55.680
 which will both revitalize

00:15:55.679 --> 00:15:56.679
 but also satisfies.

00:15:57.359 --> 00:15:57.500
 Okay?

00:15:57.719 --> 00:15:58.479
 And so that's what we want

00:15:58.479 --> 00:15:59.079
 to do a little bit

00:15:59.079 --> 00:15:59.539
 this morning.

00:16:00.439 --> 00:16:00.679
 Now,

00:16:01.500 --> 00:16:03.019
 our modern secular culture

00:16:03.019 --> 00:16:04.219
 isn't the first culture

00:16:04.219 --> 00:16:05.779
 to try and reframe

00:16:05.779 --> 00:16:06.719
 and redefine

00:16:06.719 --> 00:16:07.899
 marriage and relationships.

00:16:08.500 --> 00:16:09.199
 In the passage

00:16:09.199 --> 00:16:10.519
 that Nikki read to us earlier,

00:16:10.639 --> 00:16:11.359
 Matthew 19,

00:16:11.839 --> 00:16:12.779
 some religious leaders

00:16:12.779 --> 00:16:13.539
 come to Jesus

00:16:13.539 --> 00:16:15.139
 and they want to do the same.

00:16:15.219 --> 00:16:16.479
 They're trying to ask Jesus

00:16:16.479 --> 00:16:18.379
 what is a legitimate marriage

00:16:18.379 --> 00:16:19.019
 and therefore

00:16:19.019 --> 00:16:20.339
 what does legitimate divorce

00:16:20.339 --> 00:16:20.979
 look like?

00:16:21.439 --> 00:16:22.299
 And they're trying to get

00:16:22.299 --> 00:16:23.519
 a handle and grasp

00:16:23.519 --> 00:16:24.419
 on what does marriage

00:16:24.419 --> 00:16:25.479
 really look like.

00:16:26.279 --> 00:16:27.379
 And what Jesus does

00:16:27.379 --> 00:16:28.179
 is he goes back

00:16:28.179 --> 00:16:29.539
 to Genesis 1 and 2,

00:16:29.679 --> 00:16:31.139
 back to the very origins

00:16:31.139 --> 00:16:32.719
 of God's design for marriage

00:16:32.719 --> 00:16:33.679
 and he answers them

00:16:33.679 --> 00:16:34.239
 that way.

00:16:34.799 --> 00:16:35.379
 And so let's look

00:16:35.379 --> 00:16:36.179
 at this passage again.

00:16:36.259 --> 00:16:36.719
 I'm going to read

00:16:36.719 --> 00:16:38.279
 just Matthew 19 to us again

00:16:38.279 --> 00:16:39.339
 and then we're going

00:16:39.339 --> 00:16:40.359
 to see what Jesus says.

00:16:40.639 --> 00:16:41.539
 So let's read it.

00:16:42.279 --> 00:16:43.359
 Pharisees come to Jesus

00:16:43.359 --> 00:16:44.139
 and they test him

00:16:44.139 --> 00:16:44.379
 saying,

00:16:44.539 --> 00:16:45.620
 is it lawful for a man

00:16:45.620 --> 00:16:46.719
 to divorce his wife

00:16:46.719 --> 00:16:47.399
 for any reason?

00:16:48.059 --> 00:16:49.120
 Jesus answers and says,

00:16:49.239 --> 00:16:50.159
 have you not read

00:16:50.159 --> 00:16:52.079
 that he who created them

00:16:52.079 --> 00:16:52.759
 from the beginning

00:16:52.759 --> 00:16:54.199
 made them male and female?

00:16:54.200 --> 00:16:55.259
 And he said,

00:16:55.940 --> 00:16:56.480
 therefore man shall

00:16:56.480 --> 00:16:57.720
 leave his father and mother

00:16:57.720 --> 00:16:59.080
 and hold fast to his wife

00:16:59.080 --> 00:17:00.680
 and the two will become

00:17:00.680 --> 00:17:01.400
 one flesh.

00:17:02.000 --> 00:17:03.320
 So they're no longer two

00:17:03.320 --> 00:17:04.559
 but one.

00:17:04.920 --> 00:17:06.220
 What God has joined together,

00:17:06.720 --> 00:17:08.059
 let not man separate.

00:17:08.840 --> 00:17:09.860
 Now in this passage,

00:17:10.000 --> 00:17:10.819
 I want us just to see

00:17:10.819 --> 00:17:11.480
 three things

00:17:11.480 --> 00:17:13.340
 and there are so many things

00:17:13.340 --> 00:17:14.240
 we could say about marriage.

00:17:14.340 --> 00:17:15.420
 So we're going to hardly

00:17:15.420 --> 00:17:16.980
 even scratch the surface.

00:17:17.440 --> 00:17:18.259
 But I want us to think

00:17:18.259 --> 00:17:20.019
 about God's plan for marriage,

00:17:20.420 --> 00:17:21.660
 God's purpose for marriage

00:17:21.660 --> 00:17:22.560
 and God's pattern.

00:17:22.779 --> 00:17:24.160
 Okay, I'm sorry there are three Ps.

00:17:24.279 --> 00:17:25.240
 I know that's very irritating

00:17:25.240 --> 00:17:26.900
 but it just worked today.

00:17:27.040 --> 00:17:28.180
 Okay, God's plan,

00:17:28.279 --> 00:17:28.759
 God's purpose,

00:17:28.880 --> 00:17:29.440
 God's pattern.

00:17:29.640 --> 00:17:30.480
 Okay, so let's dive in.

00:17:30.540 --> 00:17:32.080
 Firstly, God's plan

00:17:32.080 --> 00:17:33.800
 or God's design for marriage.

00:17:34.060 --> 00:17:35.620
 Let's see what Jesus says

00:17:35.620 --> 00:17:36.920
 God built into marriage.

00:17:38.320 --> 00:17:39.160
 There's a couple of things here

00:17:39.160 --> 00:17:40.120
 but the first thing is this.

00:17:40.320 --> 00:17:41.800
 Rather than a partnership,

00:17:42.200 --> 00:17:43.200
 God designed marriage

00:17:43.200 --> 00:17:44.880
 as a one flesh union.

00:17:45.259 --> 00:17:46.420
 Look at verse four with me.

00:17:47.600 --> 00:17:48.700
 Jesus quotes Genesis,

00:17:48.900 --> 00:17:49.080
 says,

00:17:49.079 --> 00:17:50.500
 Therefore man will leave

00:17:50.500 --> 00:17:51.579
 his father and mother

00:17:51.579 --> 00:17:53.199
 and hold fast his wife

00:17:53.199 --> 00:17:54.960
 and the two will become one flesh.

00:17:55.199 --> 00:17:56.839
 So they are no longer two

00:17:56.839 --> 00:17:58.399
 but one flesh.

00:17:59.139 --> 00:18:01.480
 I have a friend called Davi

00:18:01.480 --> 00:18:02.359
 or David Lowe.

00:18:02.939 --> 00:18:04.099
 In South Africa we call him Davi

00:18:04.099 --> 00:18:05.099
 but the rest of the world

00:18:05.099 --> 00:18:05.759
 we call him David.

00:18:05.899 --> 00:18:07.519
 He pastors a church

00:18:07.519 --> 00:18:08.199
 in New York City.

00:18:08.879 --> 00:18:09.839
 And when he was engaged

00:18:09.839 --> 00:18:10.839
 to his fiancee,

00:18:10.919 --> 00:18:11.960
 I remember him talking to me

00:18:11.960 --> 00:18:12.240
 and saying,

00:18:12.679 --> 00:18:13.740
 he used to think of marriage

00:18:13.740 --> 00:18:14.779
 as like a football field.

00:18:15.119 --> 00:18:16.039
 And you both start

00:18:16.039 --> 00:18:16.899
 on either end,

00:18:16.980 --> 00:18:17.779
 you know, the goal line

00:18:17.779 --> 00:18:19.319
 and you kind of come together

00:18:19.319 --> 00:18:19.859
 and you meet

00:18:19.859 --> 00:18:20.940
 in the halfway line

00:18:20.940 --> 00:18:23.079
 and you both bring 50-50

00:18:23.079 --> 00:18:24.639
 to the table

00:18:24.639 --> 00:18:25.160
 and you meet

00:18:25.160 --> 00:18:25.980
 in the halfway line

00:18:25.980 --> 00:18:27.319
 and you agree

00:18:27.319 --> 00:18:29.700
 to do this life together.

00:18:30.899 --> 00:18:32.139
 But 50-50

00:18:32.139 --> 00:18:33.039
 is the language

00:18:33.039 --> 00:18:33.920
 of partnership,

00:18:34.099 --> 00:18:34.879
 not the language

00:18:34.879 --> 00:18:36.240
 of one flesh union.

00:18:37.339 --> 00:18:38.139
 God's design

00:18:38.139 --> 00:18:39.139
 is not that we come

00:18:39.139 --> 00:18:39.920
 into marriage saying,

00:18:40.039 --> 00:18:40.160
 listen,

00:18:40.279 --> 00:18:41.200
 you bring your contribution,

00:18:41.359 --> 00:18:42.359
 I'll bring my contribution

00:18:42.359 --> 00:18:43.180
 and together

00:18:43.180 --> 00:18:44.200
 one plus one

00:18:44.200 --> 00:18:44.920
 will equal two.

00:18:45.039 --> 00:18:46.480
 We'll form this

00:18:46.480 --> 00:18:47.759
 human partnership.

00:18:48.420 --> 00:18:49.700
 Rather than this partnership,

00:18:49.960 --> 00:18:50.500
 the language

00:18:50.500 --> 00:18:51.120
 of the scriptures

00:18:51.120 --> 00:18:51.860
 is a language

00:18:51.860 --> 00:18:53.200
 of a union,

00:18:53.339 --> 00:18:54.680
 of the two becoming one.

00:18:55.180 --> 00:18:56.460
 And when the two become one,

00:18:56.579 --> 00:18:57.579
 there's something different,

00:18:57.660 --> 00:18:58.740
 there's a new entity

00:18:58.740 --> 00:18:59.460
 that's formed,

00:18:59.880 --> 00:19:00.720
 it's more than just

00:19:00.720 --> 00:19:01.200
 the substance

00:19:01.200 --> 00:19:02.779
 of the sum of the parts.

00:19:03.240 --> 00:19:03.980
 It's kind of like,

00:19:04.019 --> 00:19:04.880
 this is a bad analogy,

00:19:05.039 --> 00:19:05.860
 but it's kind of like,

00:19:06.259 --> 00:19:07.220
 think of hydrogen

00:19:07.220 --> 00:19:07.720
 and oxygen

00:19:07.720 --> 00:19:08.559
 coming together.

00:19:09.220 --> 00:19:09.839
 Two hydrogen,

00:19:10.000 --> 00:19:10.559
 one oxygen.

00:19:10.960 --> 00:19:12.200
 It's not just the sum

00:19:12.200 --> 00:19:13.079
 of two hydrogen,

00:19:13.240 --> 00:19:13.680
 one oxygen.

00:19:13.779 --> 00:19:14.380
 There's some kind

00:19:14.380 --> 00:19:15.180
 of new substance

00:19:15.180 --> 00:19:15.779
 that's formed.

00:19:15.880 --> 00:19:16.840
 It's not just the gas,

00:19:17.279 --> 00:19:18.259
 there's a new water,

00:19:18.380 --> 00:19:18.779
 there's a water

00:19:18.779 --> 00:19:19.440
 that's formed.

00:19:20.920 --> 00:19:22.340
 When the two come together

00:19:22.340 --> 00:19:23.100
 in marriage,

00:19:23.279 --> 00:19:24.060
 God's ideals,

00:19:24.200 --> 00:19:24.799
 there's not just

00:19:24.799 --> 00:19:25.539
 this partnership

00:19:25.539 --> 00:19:26.840
 of you bring your contribution,

00:19:26.980 --> 00:19:27.620
 I'll bring mine.

00:19:27.920 --> 00:19:28.420
 There's something

00:19:28.420 --> 00:19:29.299
 altogether new

00:19:29.299 --> 00:19:29.900
 and distinctive

00:19:29.900 --> 00:19:31.060
 about the oneness,

00:19:31.180 --> 00:19:32.180
 the one flesh union.

00:19:33.259 --> 00:19:33.940
 I don't know if you remember

00:19:33.940 --> 00:19:34.620
 the traditional,

00:19:34.779 --> 00:19:35.500
 the last line

00:19:35.500 --> 00:19:36.560
 of traditional vows.

00:19:37.039 --> 00:19:38.120
 It goes something like this,

00:19:38.519 --> 00:19:39.799
 with all that I have

00:19:39.799 --> 00:19:41.360
 and with all that I am,

00:19:41.460 --> 00:19:42.960
 I give myself to you.

00:19:43.200 --> 00:19:43.320
 Okay,

00:19:43.320 --> 00:19:44.060
 does that sound familiar?

00:19:44.759 --> 00:19:44.940
 Okay,

00:19:44.940 --> 00:19:45.579
 that's much better

00:19:45.579 --> 00:19:46.639
 than salmon and sushi,

00:19:46.819 --> 00:19:47.000
 right?

00:19:47.740 --> 00:19:49.059
 With all that I am

00:19:49.059 --> 00:19:50.099
 and all that I have,

00:19:50.139 --> 00:19:51.259
 I give myself to you.

00:19:51.879 --> 00:19:53.159
 Now imagine saying that

00:19:53.159 --> 00:19:54.339
 in a business partnership,

00:19:54.519 --> 00:19:54.720
 right?

00:19:54.839 --> 00:19:55.460
 Those of you that are

00:19:55.460 --> 00:19:56.460
 involved in M&As,

00:19:56.599 --> 00:19:57.440
 imagine writing that

00:19:57.440 --> 00:19:58.079
 into the agreement,

00:19:58.240 --> 00:19:58.460
 right?

00:19:58.599 --> 00:19:59.460
 I just want you to know,

00:19:59.759 --> 00:20:00.759
 with all that I have

00:20:00.759 --> 00:20:02.000
 and all that I am,

00:20:02.039 --> 00:20:02.599
 all that I have,

00:20:02.639 --> 00:20:03.799
 I give myself to you,

00:20:03.839 --> 00:20:04.000
 right?

00:20:04.339 --> 00:20:05.399
 Your business partner

00:20:05.399 --> 00:20:05.819
 is going to think

00:20:05.819 --> 00:20:06.720
 they've hit the jackpot.

00:20:06.839 --> 00:20:07.099
 They're going to say,

00:20:07.200 --> 00:20:07.379
 just,

00:20:07.779 --> 00:20:07.919
 sorry,

00:20:07.960 --> 00:20:08.619
 what's the password

00:20:08.619 --> 00:20:09.980
 to your personal bank accounts

00:20:09.980 --> 00:20:11.519
 and that holiday home

00:20:11.519 --> 00:20:12.159
 in Seychelles?

00:20:12.160 --> 00:20:13.220
 I'll take that as well.

00:20:14.500 --> 00:20:15.940
 That's covenant,

00:20:16.100 --> 00:20:16.820
 that's union,

00:20:17.019 --> 00:20:17.279
 right?

00:20:17.660 --> 00:20:18.320
 It's not just,

00:20:18.480 --> 00:20:18.640
 listen,

00:20:18.740 --> 00:20:19.540
 this is what I'll bring,

00:20:19.600 --> 00:20:20.279
 this is what you bring,

00:20:20.360 --> 00:20:21.540
 let's see if we can make this work.

00:20:21.700 --> 00:20:23.120
 There's something altogether different.

00:20:24.000 --> 00:20:24.279
 Now,

00:20:24.420 --> 00:20:24.820
 practically,

00:20:24.940 --> 00:20:25.600
 what does that mean?

00:20:25.599 --> 00:20:28.339
 It means one of the most important things

00:20:28.339 --> 00:20:29.659
 for those of us that are married

00:20:29.659 --> 00:20:33.819
 is to fight for the oneness in our marriage,

00:20:34.379 --> 00:20:36.459
 to fight for the oneness and the unity.

00:20:37.339 --> 00:20:38.679
 Remember what we said last week,

00:20:38.939 --> 00:20:40.500
 you can win the battle

00:20:40.500 --> 00:20:41.500
 but lose the war,

00:20:41.579 --> 00:20:41.779
 right?

00:20:41.859 --> 00:20:42.919
 You can win the argument

00:20:42.919 --> 00:20:44.119
 and lose the relationship.

00:20:44.839 --> 00:20:45.919
 One of the things that Claire and I

00:20:45.919 --> 00:20:47.719
 early on in our marriage worked out

00:20:47.719 --> 00:20:49.059
 was that when we have a disagreement

00:20:49.059 --> 00:20:50.759
 and we do have disagreements,

00:20:51.139 --> 00:20:52.059
 I know we always look like

00:20:52.059 --> 00:20:53.779
 we're perfectly in love with church on Sundays,

00:20:53.779 --> 00:20:55.619
 but we do have disagreements.

00:20:56.539 --> 00:20:58.599
 We worked out that when that happens,

00:20:59.039 --> 00:21:00.680
 we've got to quickly remind ourselves,

00:21:00.859 --> 00:21:00.960
 hey,

00:21:01.019 --> 00:21:02.079
 we're on the same team here.

00:21:02.720 --> 00:21:03.680
 We're in this together.

00:21:04.259 --> 00:21:05.599
 And so you are not the enemy,

00:21:05.779 --> 00:21:06.700
 I'm not the enemy,

00:21:06.879 --> 00:21:08.480
 the issue that's come between us

00:21:08.480 --> 00:21:09.059
 is the enemy,

00:21:09.200 --> 00:21:09.420
 right?

00:21:09.779 --> 00:21:11.099
 I'm not here to attack you,

00:21:11.200 --> 00:21:12.019
 you don't attack me.

00:21:12.099 --> 00:21:13.779
 Let's attack what's coming between us.

00:21:14.180 --> 00:21:14.420
 Yes,

00:21:14.460 --> 00:21:15.139
 I'm being selfish,

00:21:15.420 --> 00:21:15.599
 yes,

00:21:15.639 --> 00:21:16.319
 I'm being a dork,

00:21:16.579 --> 00:21:16.819
 okay,

00:21:16.899 --> 00:21:17.960
 let's attack that

00:21:17.960 --> 00:21:19.879
 but let's not attack one another.

00:21:20.019 --> 00:21:20.920
 We're in this together,

00:21:21.059 --> 00:21:22.119
 we're on the same team,

00:21:22.119 --> 00:21:24.159
 even in the midst of an argument.

00:21:25.079 --> 00:21:26.159
 And so practically,

00:21:26.439 --> 00:21:28.819
 fight for the oneness in your marriage.

00:21:29.199 --> 00:21:30.519
 The second thing it means is this,

00:21:30.699 --> 00:21:32.919
 do whatever it takes to build

00:21:32.919 --> 00:21:35.699
 and possibly rebuild the bond of trust.

00:21:36.279 --> 00:21:38.399
 Every management book in the world will tell you,

00:21:38.459 --> 00:21:38.559
 right,

00:21:38.659 --> 00:21:40.279
 Jim Collins and Patrick Lencioni,

00:21:40.339 --> 00:21:41.179
 these guys will tell you

00:21:41.179 --> 00:21:43.319
 that trust in a leadership team,

00:21:43.379 --> 00:21:43.839
 in a business,

00:21:44.059 --> 00:21:45.579
 is the most critical thing.

00:21:45.979 --> 00:21:46.979
 If you don't have trust,

00:21:47.319 --> 00:21:48.119
 you're in deep trouble.

00:21:48.119 --> 00:21:49.599
 Within a marriage,

00:21:49.699 --> 00:21:50.719
 do whatever you can

00:21:50.719 --> 00:21:51.899
 to build and rebuild

00:21:51.899 --> 00:21:52.919
 the bond of trust

00:21:52.919 --> 00:21:54.299
 because when the trust is broken,

00:21:54.479 --> 00:21:56.159
 that oneness is so difficult.

00:21:56.919 --> 00:21:57.079
 Okay,

00:21:57.219 --> 00:21:58.719
 so that's the first part of God's design.

00:21:59.219 --> 00:22:00.319
 Notice something else here.

00:22:00.979 --> 00:22:03.559
 God's design is that it's a divine union,

00:22:03.679 --> 00:22:04.899
 not a human union.

00:22:05.539 --> 00:22:07.099
 Look at what he says here in verse six.

00:22:07.619 --> 00:22:09.199
 They're no longer two but one flesh.

00:22:09.679 --> 00:22:11.519
 What God has joined together,

00:22:12.079 --> 00:22:13.319
 let not man separate.

00:22:14.159 --> 00:22:15.799
 Marriage is not just the coming together

00:22:15.799 --> 00:22:17.619
 of two humans.

00:22:18.240 --> 00:22:20.500
 There's something of God's divine,

00:22:20.720 --> 00:22:21.299
 supernatural,

00:22:21.500 --> 00:22:23.579
 divine work,

00:22:23.759 --> 00:22:25.619
 his handiwork that brings them together.

00:22:26.339 --> 00:22:27.299
 I don't know how many of you

00:22:27.299 --> 00:22:28.940
 are artists or creatives, okay?

00:22:29.220 --> 00:22:31.000
 I know most of us here are lawyers

00:22:31.000 --> 00:22:31.879
 or finance people

00:22:31.879 --> 00:22:33.960
 but let's imagine some of us are artists.

00:22:34.059 --> 00:22:36.099
 You try your hand at sketching or drawing

00:22:36.099 --> 00:22:38.119
 and you don't like what you do, right?

00:22:38.419 --> 00:22:39.240
 So what do you do?

00:22:39.460 --> 00:22:40.960
 You scrunch it up and you throw it away

00:22:40.960 --> 00:22:41.819
 and you try again.

00:22:41.980 --> 00:22:42.220
 Okay,

00:22:42.379 --> 00:22:42.559
 well,

00:22:42.659 --> 00:22:43.480
 you're allowed to do that.

00:22:43.539 --> 00:22:44.099
 It's your work.

00:22:44.099 --> 00:22:46.879
 But try doing that to someone else's work,

00:22:46.939 --> 00:22:47.159
 right?

00:22:47.879 --> 00:22:48.759
 You're in an art class

00:22:48.759 --> 00:22:50.500
 and you don't like the person's art next to you

00:22:50.500 --> 00:22:51.439
 and so you scrunch it up

00:22:51.439 --> 00:22:52.179
 and you throw it away.

00:22:52.399 --> 00:22:54.159
 It's not going to go down very well,

00:22:54.240 --> 00:22:54.519
 right?

00:22:55.639 --> 00:22:58.379
 Marriage is not a human institution.

00:22:59.459 --> 00:23:01.259
 God says it's his handiwork.

00:23:01.419 --> 00:23:02.779
 It's his creative genius.

00:23:03.459 --> 00:23:04.899
 It's he who's designed it

00:23:04.899 --> 00:23:07.459
 and it's he who unites two people together.

00:23:07.919 --> 00:23:09.559
 What God has joined together,

00:23:10.079 --> 00:23:11.079
 let not man separate.

00:23:11.079 --> 00:23:12.279
 Now,

00:23:12.539 --> 00:23:13.720
 what that means is

00:23:13.720 --> 00:23:14.500
 the point here

00:23:14.500 --> 00:23:15.679
 is that partly

00:23:15.679 --> 00:23:17.619
 divorce is really serious.

00:23:17.779 --> 00:23:18.619
 It defaces

00:23:18.619 --> 00:23:20.039
 God's artwork,

00:23:20.199 --> 00:23:21.460
 God's creative handiwork.

00:23:22.000 --> 00:23:23.099
 But the other point here

00:23:23.099 --> 00:23:24.460
 is that marriage

00:23:24.460 --> 00:23:26.000
 is not just a human partnership.

00:23:26.460 --> 00:23:27.740
 It's a divine union.

00:23:27.960 --> 00:23:28.980
 God is its architect

00:23:28.980 --> 00:23:29.659
 and designer,

00:23:29.799 --> 00:23:30.439
 its creator,

00:23:30.779 --> 00:23:31.619
 but also the one

00:23:31.619 --> 00:23:32.799
 that unites us together.

00:23:33.460 --> 00:23:34.240
 And that means

00:23:34.240 --> 00:23:35.359
 that in order for marriages

00:23:35.359 --> 00:23:36.079
 to flourish,

00:23:36.539 --> 00:23:37.779
 we need to not just do it

00:23:37.779 --> 00:23:39.220
 according to God's instructions

00:23:39.220 --> 00:23:40.279
 and his recipe,

00:23:40.480 --> 00:23:41.960
 we actually need to invite God

00:23:41.960 --> 00:23:42.720
 into the center

00:23:42.720 --> 00:23:43.940
 of our marriages.

00:23:44.700 --> 00:23:45.420
 Another way of saying that

00:23:45.420 --> 00:23:46.660
 is in every marriage,

00:23:47.019 --> 00:23:49.160
 there's not just a horizontal component

00:23:49.160 --> 00:23:50.279
 between me and Claire.

00:23:50.360 --> 00:23:52.319
 There's a vertical component as well.

00:23:52.900 --> 00:23:54.539
 God wants us to invite himself

00:23:54.539 --> 00:23:55.400
 into the center

00:23:55.400 --> 00:23:56.240
 of our marriages.

00:23:57.079 --> 00:23:57.299
 Now,

00:23:57.440 --> 00:23:58.299
 practically speaking,

00:23:58.380 --> 00:23:59.000
 what does that mean?

00:23:59.600 --> 00:24:00.920
 For those of us that are married

00:24:00.920 --> 00:24:02.500
 or those of you that are dating,

00:24:03.279 --> 00:24:04.360
 when was the last time

00:24:04.360 --> 00:24:05.000
 you prayed

00:24:05.000 --> 00:24:05.980
 with your spouse

00:24:05.980 --> 00:24:06.600
 or your boyfriend

00:24:06.599 --> 00:24:07.199
 and your girlfriend?

00:24:07.799 --> 00:24:08.519
 And not just prayed

00:24:08.519 --> 00:24:09.740
 for the meal at dinner time

00:24:09.740 --> 00:24:10.959
 or prayed when there's a crisis.

00:24:11.740 --> 00:24:12.299
 When was the last time

00:24:12.299 --> 00:24:12.919
 we prayed to you

00:24:12.919 --> 00:24:13.679
 and invited God

00:24:13.679 --> 00:24:14.500
 into our relationship?

00:24:15.339 --> 00:24:16.279
 When Claire and I were dating,

00:24:16.419 --> 00:24:17.219
 we were actually better

00:24:17.219 --> 00:24:18.139
 at this dating

00:24:18.139 --> 00:24:20.219
 than we are when we married.

00:24:21.039 --> 00:24:22.359
 But just say,

00:24:22.399 --> 00:24:22.559
 God,

00:24:22.639 --> 00:24:23.319
 come and have your way

00:24:23.319 --> 00:24:23.819
 in our marriage.

00:24:24.119 --> 00:24:24.299
 God,

00:24:24.359 --> 00:24:24.859
 this week,

00:24:24.939 --> 00:24:25.859
 you know the challenges

00:24:25.859 --> 00:24:26.539
 that we're going to face.

00:24:26.619 --> 00:24:27.359
 Come and have your way.

00:24:27.859 --> 00:24:28.079
 God,

00:24:28.099 --> 00:24:29.039
 we want to surrender to you.

00:24:29.039 --> 00:24:29.519
 We want you to be

00:24:29.519 --> 00:24:30.240
 at the very center,

00:24:30.959 --> 00:24:31.679
 inviting God

00:24:31.679 --> 00:24:32.359
 into the center

00:24:32.359 --> 00:24:33.119
 of our relationships.

00:24:33.919 --> 00:24:35.299
 So part of God's design

00:24:35.299 --> 00:24:37.119
 is it's this divine union

00:24:37.119 --> 00:24:38.480
 of two becoming one.

00:24:38.899 --> 00:24:39.819
 But there's something else

00:24:39.819 --> 00:24:40.839
 in God's design here

00:24:40.839 --> 00:24:41.659
 and that is

00:24:41.659 --> 00:24:43.619
 that we see from these verses

00:24:43.619 --> 00:24:45.079
 that for those who are married,

00:24:45.859 --> 00:24:47.859
 this becomes the most significant

00:24:47.859 --> 00:24:49.319
 of human relationships.

00:24:49.859 --> 00:24:51.399
 Look at what Jesus says here.

00:24:51.819 --> 00:24:52.659
 Have you not read

00:24:52.659 --> 00:24:53.960
 that he who created them

00:24:53.960 --> 00:24:54.579
 from the beginning

00:24:54.579 --> 00:24:55.779
 made them male and female?

00:24:56.339 --> 00:24:57.039
 And he said,

00:24:57.039 --> 00:24:57.519
 therefore,

00:24:57.919 --> 00:24:59.639
 man shall leave his father and mother

00:24:59.639 --> 00:25:01.940
 and hold fast to his wife.

00:25:01.940 --> 00:25:03.539
 Now,

00:25:03.680 --> 00:25:04.700
 if you grew up

00:25:04.700 --> 00:25:05.960
 in the Western world,

00:25:06.059 --> 00:25:06.900
 America or Europe,

00:25:07.039 --> 00:25:08.500
 or if that's your cultural background,

00:25:08.820 --> 00:25:10.299
 this is not even shocking,

00:25:10.460 --> 00:25:10.660
 right?

00:25:10.740 --> 00:25:12.200
 This is like obvious.

00:25:12.860 --> 00:25:13.299
 Why?

00:25:13.400 --> 00:25:14.559
 Because as Westerners,

00:25:14.660 --> 00:25:15.240
 myself included,

00:25:15.380 --> 00:25:17.180
 we are so individualistic,

00:25:17.420 --> 00:25:17.620
 okay?

00:25:17.640 --> 00:25:18.860
 We don't have a good understanding

00:25:18.860 --> 00:25:20.299
 of the family unit

00:25:20.299 --> 00:25:21.080
 and the family tie.

00:25:21.700 --> 00:25:22.640
 But for those of us

00:25:22.640 --> 00:25:24.400
 that are Asian by culture

00:25:24.400 --> 00:25:25.320
 or grew up in Asia,

00:25:25.860 --> 00:25:27.820
 you guys are infinitely better

00:25:27.820 --> 00:25:29.140
 at family relationships

00:25:29.140 --> 00:25:30.279
 than Westerners,

00:25:30.320 --> 00:25:30.500
 right?

00:25:30.500 --> 00:25:31.460
 You know what it means

00:25:31.460 --> 00:25:32.539
 to honor your parents

00:25:32.539 --> 00:25:34.099
 and you can teach us Westerners

00:25:34.099 --> 00:25:34.740
 a whole lot.

00:25:35.500 --> 00:25:36.000
 Can I be honest?

00:25:36.099 --> 00:25:37.720
 I didn't really understand that

00:25:37.720 --> 00:25:38.880
 until I moved to Asia,

00:25:39.140 --> 00:25:40.720
 just how individualistic I was.

00:25:40.779 --> 00:25:41.740
 I've learned so much

00:25:41.740 --> 00:25:43.680
 from my Hong Kong brothers

00:25:43.680 --> 00:25:44.579
 and sisters, right?

00:25:45.960 --> 00:25:46.980
 But at the same time,

00:25:47.079 --> 00:25:48.880
 for us who are Asian culture

00:25:48.880 --> 00:25:49.400
 and ethnicity,

00:25:50.039 --> 00:25:51.099
 this can be challenging

00:25:51.099 --> 00:25:53.440
 because notice what Jesus says here.

00:25:54.240 --> 00:25:55.700
 Jesus says something shocking.

00:25:56.559 --> 00:25:56.900
 He says,

00:25:57.019 --> 00:25:58.160
 the marriage bond

00:25:58.160 --> 00:25:59.740
 is thicker than blood.

00:26:00.500 --> 00:26:01.819
 Okay?

00:26:02.819 --> 00:26:04.400
 And that can be very challenging

00:26:04.400 --> 00:26:06.279
 for us here in Hong Kong.

00:26:06.759 --> 00:26:08.240
 Now that obviously doesn't mean

00:26:08.240 --> 00:26:09.619
 that we dishonor our parents,

00:26:09.680 --> 00:26:10.980
 we don't care about our parents,

00:26:11.039 --> 00:26:11.619
 or our children

00:26:11.619 --> 00:26:12.819
 aren't important to us.

00:26:13.099 --> 00:26:14.019
 Jesus is not saying that.

00:26:14.059 --> 00:26:14.420
 He's not saying

00:26:14.420 --> 00:26:15.400
 it's the only relationship.

00:26:16.059 --> 00:26:16.559
 But he says

00:26:16.559 --> 00:26:17.259
 there's something

00:26:17.259 --> 00:26:19.059
 so profoundly significant

00:26:19.059 --> 00:26:20.539
 that it becomes

00:26:20.539 --> 00:26:21.759
 the most significant

00:26:21.759 --> 00:26:22.599
 and important

00:26:22.599 --> 00:26:23.440
 of your relationships.

00:26:24.440 --> 00:26:24.819
 Okay?

00:26:24.819 --> 00:26:26.799
 Now what does that mean?

00:26:27.579 --> 00:26:27.919
 Well,

00:26:28.519 --> 00:26:29.740
 one of the things that it means,

00:26:29.819 --> 00:26:31.099
 and all psychology students

00:26:31.099 --> 00:26:32.079
 will tell us this,

00:26:32.720 --> 00:26:34.099
 that one of the things it means

00:26:34.099 --> 00:26:34.619
 is that

00:26:34.619 --> 00:26:35.740
 for those of us

00:26:35.740 --> 00:26:36.259
 that are married

00:26:36.259 --> 00:26:37.039
 and have kids,

00:26:37.759 --> 00:26:39.299
 the very best thing

00:26:39.299 --> 00:26:40.000
 that we can do

00:26:40.000 --> 00:26:40.759
 for our children

00:26:40.759 --> 00:26:42.419
 is to have a healthy marriage.

00:26:43.240 --> 00:26:44.480
 And all psychology students

00:26:44.480 --> 00:26:45.240
 will tell us this,

00:26:45.319 --> 00:26:46.639
 that as long as

00:26:46.639 --> 00:26:48.819
 people living in Asia,

00:26:48.819 --> 00:26:50.619
 we put so much

00:26:50.619 --> 00:26:52.220
 emphasis on our kids

00:26:52.220 --> 00:26:53.720
 that the tendency

00:26:53.720 --> 00:26:54.379
 is to sometimes

00:26:54.379 --> 00:26:55.359
 neglect our marriages

00:26:55.359 --> 00:26:56.379
 to serve our kids.

00:26:57.179 --> 00:26:58.599
 But Jesus actually tells us

00:26:58.599 --> 00:26:59.919
 that the very best thing

00:26:59.919 --> 00:27:00.919
 we can do for our kids,

00:27:01.039 --> 00:27:02.659
 the most secure thing

00:27:02.659 --> 00:27:03.339
 we can do for them

00:27:03.339 --> 00:27:04.879
 is to have a healthy marriage.

00:27:05.740 --> 00:27:05.899
 Okay?

00:27:06.720 --> 00:27:07.879
 But there's many ways

00:27:07.879 --> 00:27:08.519
 that we cannot

00:27:08.519 --> 00:27:09.559
 leave our parents.

00:27:09.939 --> 00:27:10.399
 Tim Keller,

00:27:10.619 --> 00:27:11.460
 I heard him say this

00:27:11.460 --> 00:27:12.220
 many years ago

00:27:12.220 --> 00:27:13.220
 and it's always impacted me.

00:27:13.339 --> 00:27:13.899
 He said this,

00:27:14.419 --> 00:27:16.240
 some people are so angry,

00:27:16.539 --> 00:27:17.240
 so bitter

00:27:17.240 --> 00:27:18.240
 with their parents

00:27:18.240 --> 00:27:19.359
 that they promise

00:27:19.359 --> 00:27:20.819
 to never be like them,

00:27:20.920 --> 00:27:22.220
 to do everything they can

00:27:22.220 --> 00:27:23.319
 to be different from them.

00:27:23.940 --> 00:27:24.779
 But don't you see

00:27:24.779 --> 00:27:26.019
 that you're still tied to them?

00:27:26.500 --> 00:27:27.759
 They're still controlling you.

00:27:28.220 --> 00:27:29.599
 You actually haven't left them.

00:27:30.380 --> 00:27:31.120
 And his point is

00:27:31.120 --> 00:27:32.099
 that there's many ways

00:27:32.099 --> 00:27:33.019
 to not leave

00:27:33.019 --> 00:27:34.019
 our parents' home

00:27:34.019 --> 00:27:35.039
 and for our parents

00:27:35.039 --> 00:27:35.500
 to still have

00:27:35.500 --> 00:27:36.660
 a controlling relationship

00:27:36.660 --> 00:27:37.319
 over us,

00:27:37.539 --> 00:27:38.680
 even if it's our anger

00:27:38.680 --> 00:27:39.460
 and our bitterness

00:27:39.460 --> 00:27:40.680
 towards them.

00:27:41.359 --> 00:27:41.519
 Okay?

00:27:41.579 --> 00:27:42.180
 So all of that

00:27:42.180 --> 00:27:43.460
 is God's design,

00:27:43.640 --> 00:27:45.200
 God's plan for marriage

00:27:45.200 --> 00:27:46.660
 is this divine,

00:27:46.960 --> 00:27:47.980
 one flesh,

00:27:47.980 --> 00:27:48.460
 union

00:27:48.460 --> 00:27:49.539
 with God

00:27:49.539 --> 00:27:50.259
 at the center

00:27:50.259 --> 00:27:51.539
 of our marriages.

00:27:51.660 --> 00:27:51.860
 Okay?

00:27:51.980 --> 00:27:52.680
 Does that make sense?

00:27:53.519 --> 00:27:54.000
 Okay.

00:27:54.200 --> 00:27:54.539
 Great.

00:27:54.900 --> 00:27:55.319
 Thank you.

00:27:55.900 --> 00:27:56.299
 Secondly,

00:27:56.559 --> 00:27:57.920
 God's purpose for marriage.

00:27:58.740 --> 00:27:59.799
 God's purpose for marriage.

00:28:00.160 --> 00:28:00.460
 Now,

00:28:00.579 --> 00:28:01.420
 when the Pharisees

00:28:01.420 --> 00:28:02.180
 come to Jesus

00:28:02.180 --> 00:28:03.019
 and they ask him

00:28:03.019 --> 00:28:04.079
 about marriage and divorce,

00:28:04.200 --> 00:28:05.120
 they're asking him

00:28:05.120 --> 00:28:06.299
 a legal question.

00:28:06.779 --> 00:28:07.700
 They're saying to him,

00:28:08.200 --> 00:28:09.519
 based on the law

00:28:09.519 --> 00:28:10.759
 that God gave to Moses,

00:28:11.140 --> 00:28:12.319
 what is the right thing

00:28:12.319 --> 00:28:12.759
 to do?

00:28:12.960 --> 00:28:13.240
 Okay?

00:28:13.759 --> 00:28:14.779
 And when Jesus

00:28:14.779 --> 00:28:15.559
 answers them,

00:28:15.720 --> 00:28:16.960
 Jesus doesn't go back

00:28:16.960 --> 00:28:17.819
 to the law of Moses.

00:28:18.000 --> 00:28:18.579
 He goes back

00:28:18.579 --> 00:28:19.500
 prior to that

00:28:19.500 --> 00:28:20.759
 to Genesis 1 and 2.

00:28:21.160 --> 00:28:21.779
 He goes back

00:28:21.779 --> 00:28:23.380
 to God's original design

00:28:23.380 --> 00:28:24.480
 and purpose for marriage.

00:28:25.140 --> 00:28:26.500
 And in Genesis 1 and 2,

00:28:26.860 --> 00:28:28.640
 we see God's intention

00:28:28.640 --> 00:28:29.799
 and purpose for marriage.

00:28:29.940 --> 00:28:30.680
 Now, again,

00:28:30.759 --> 00:28:31.860
 there's lots of things here,

00:28:31.920 --> 00:28:32.620
 but I want to focus

00:28:32.620 --> 00:28:33.519
 on just one of them.

00:28:34.680 --> 00:28:35.579
 In Genesis 1,

00:28:35.799 --> 00:28:37.140
 Nikki read it for us earlier,

00:28:37.140 --> 00:28:39.420
 we see that the triune God,

00:28:39.520 --> 00:28:40.440
 Father, Son, and Spirit,

00:28:40.860 --> 00:28:41.980
 say amongst themselves,

00:28:42.520 --> 00:28:43.420
 let us make mankind

00:28:43.420 --> 00:28:44.259
 in our image,

00:28:44.440 --> 00:28:45.360
 after our likeness.

00:28:45.740 --> 00:28:46.880
 So God created man

00:28:46.880 --> 00:28:47.480
 in his image.

00:28:47.600 --> 00:28:48.360
 In the image of God,

00:28:48.420 --> 00:28:49.160
 he created him.

00:28:49.560 --> 00:28:50.340
 Male and female,

00:28:50.480 --> 00:28:51.259
 he created them.

00:28:52.200 --> 00:28:53.340
 And God blessed them.

00:28:53.380 --> 00:28:54.120
 And he said to them,

00:28:54.480 --> 00:28:55.740
 be fruitful and multiply,

00:28:56.280 --> 00:28:57.040
 fill the earth

00:28:57.040 --> 00:28:57.780
 and subdue it

00:28:57.780 --> 00:28:58.920
 and have dominion over it.

00:28:59.400 --> 00:29:00.560
 And then in chapter 2,

00:29:00.720 --> 00:29:01.920
 we see the same thing,

00:29:01.960 --> 00:29:02.600
 but from a slightly

00:29:02.600 --> 00:29:03.420
 different perspective.

00:29:04.160 --> 00:29:05.200
 God speaks to Adam

00:29:05.200 --> 00:29:05.559
 and he says,

00:29:05.680 --> 00:29:07.259
 Adam, I've made you

00:29:07.259 --> 00:29:08.940
 to care and cultivate

00:29:08.940 --> 00:29:09.600
 the world,

00:29:09.960 --> 00:29:11.340
 to steward my creation,

00:29:11.620 --> 00:29:13.220
 to keep it and look after it,

00:29:13.240 --> 00:29:14.319
 to see it flourish,

00:29:14.660 --> 00:29:14.900
 okay?

00:29:15.480 --> 00:29:16.700
 But Adam is alone.

00:29:16.840 --> 00:29:17.279
 He doesn't,

00:29:17.420 --> 00:29:18.380
 he needs a helpmate.

00:29:18.460 --> 00:29:19.000
 He needs someone

00:29:19.000 --> 00:29:20.200
 to come alongside him

00:29:20.200 --> 00:29:21.299
 in his calling

00:29:21.299 --> 00:29:22.539
 as a human being.

00:29:23.080 --> 00:29:24.680
 And so God brings Eve,

00:29:24.779 --> 00:29:25.519
 his spouse,

00:29:26.100 --> 00:29:27.240
 to come and help him

00:29:27.240 --> 00:29:28.120
 fulfill his calling.

00:29:28.819 --> 00:29:29.700
 Now, Eve

00:29:29.700 --> 00:29:31.360
 wasn't just a companion

00:29:31.360 --> 00:29:32.819
 because Adam was lonely

00:29:32.819 --> 00:29:34.539
 and needed friends, right?

00:29:34.539 --> 00:29:35.319
 Or he needed

00:29:35.319 --> 00:29:36.259
 a sexual partner.

00:29:37.220 --> 00:29:38.240
 God brought Eve

00:29:38.240 --> 00:29:39.000
 into his life

00:29:39.000 --> 00:29:40.500
 to help Adam

00:29:40.500 --> 00:29:41.859
 fulfill his calling

00:29:41.859 --> 00:29:42.899
 as a human being.

00:29:43.559 --> 00:29:44.619
 God gives Adam

00:29:44.619 --> 00:29:45.680
 a commissioning

00:29:45.680 --> 00:29:47.339
 to nurture the world,

00:29:47.700 --> 00:29:48.700
 to establish it,

00:29:48.799 --> 00:29:49.960
 to preserve God's

00:29:49.960 --> 00:29:50.960
 shalom in the world,

00:29:51.379 --> 00:29:53.180
 to steward God's agenda,

00:29:53.700 --> 00:29:54.899
 to build the kingdom

00:29:54.899 --> 00:29:56.159
 of God on earth.

00:29:56.519 --> 00:29:57.680
 But Adam can't do it

00:29:57.680 --> 00:29:58.200
 on his own

00:29:58.200 --> 00:29:59.420
 without his spouse.

00:29:59.759 --> 00:30:00.740
 He needs Eve

00:30:00.740 --> 00:30:01.859
 to come alongside him.

00:30:02.460 --> 00:30:03.240
 One commentator

00:30:03.240 --> 00:30:04.099
 said it like this,

00:30:04.099 --> 00:30:05.959
 marriage is meant

00:30:05.959 --> 00:30:06.759
 to strengthen

00:30:06.759 --> 00:30:07.819
 and complement

00:30:07.819 --> 00:30:09.139
 God's call

00:30:09.139 --> 00:30:09.879
 on our lives.

00:30:10.439 --> 00:30:11.199
 Apart from this

00:30:11.199 --> 00:30:11.779
 understanding,

00:30:11.939 --> 00:30:12.939
 we'll reduce marriage

00:30:12.939 --> 00:30:13.500
 to something

00:30:13.500 --> 00:30:14.639
 that merely fulfills

00:30:14.639 --> 00:30:15.379
 my needs,

00:30:15.619 --> 00:30:16.519
 which ironically

00:30:16.519 --> 00:30:17.619
 is one way

00:30:17.619 --> 00:30:18.219
 to destroy

00:30:18.219 --> 00:30:19.179
 any relationship,

00:30:19.679 --> 00:30:20.559
 including marriage.

00:30:21.299 --> 00:30:22.019
 Now, of course,

00:30:22.099 --> 00:30:22.779
 this is not saying

00:30:22.779 --> 00:30:23.699
 that if you're not married,

00:30:23.799 --> 00:30:24.799
 you're not fully human,

00:30:24.899 --> 00:30:25.139
 right?

00:30:25.519 --> 00:30:26.599
 Some of the very best

00:30:26.599 --> 00:30:28.159
 people in the world

00:30:28.159 --> 00:30:29.299
 have not been married.

00:30:29.379 --> 00:30:30.359
 Think of Jesus Christ.

00:30:30.759 --> 00:30:31.879
 Think of the Apostle Paul.

00:30:32.460 --> 00:30:33.120
 In our own day,

00:30:33.200 --> 00:30:34.120
 think of John Stott

00:30:34.120 --> 00:30:35.180
 and tons of others,

00:30:35.240 --> 00:30:35.460
 right?

00:30:35.780 --> 00:30:37.080
 So marriage doesn't

00:30:37.080 --> 00:30:38.060
 complete you.

00:30:38.340 --> 00:30:39.300
 Like, if you're single,

00:30:39.400 --> 00:30:40.520
 you're not fully human.

00:30:41.200 --> 00:30:42.600
 But what this is saying

00:30:42.600 --> 00:30:44.400
 is that for those of us

00:30:44.400 --> 00:30:45.240
 that are married,

00:30:45.820 --> 00:30:46.560
 marriage is meant

00:30:46.560 --> 00:30:47.620
 to be a divine union

00:30:47.620 --> 00:30:48.680
 that empowers

00:30:48.680 --> 00:30:50.040
 us to live out

00:30:50.040 --> 00:30:50.960
 our calling

00:30:50.960 --> 00:30:53.020
 as commissioned agents

00:30:53.020 --> 00:30:53.900
 to bring heaven

00:30:53.900 --> 00:30:54.720
 to earth,

00:30:55.100 --> 00:30:55.940
 to care for

00:30:55.940 --> 00:30:57.040
 and cultivate God's will,

00:30:57.140 --> 00:30:57.740
 to bring heaven

00:30:57.740 --> 00:30:58.280
 to earth,

00:30:58.440 --> 00:30:59.700
 to establish shalom

00:30:59.700 --> 00:31:00.460
 and to advance

00:31:00.460 --> 00:31:01.080
 God's kingdom

00:31:01.080 --> 00:31:01.759
 in the world.

00:31:02.460 --> 00:31:03.200
 In other words,

00:31:03.799 --> 00:31:04.740
 marriage is not just

00:31:04.740 --> 00:31:05.620
 about your happiness.

00:31:06.380 --> 00:31:07.620
 Now, you are meant

00:31:07.620 --> 00:31:08.400
 to be happily married,

00:31:08.480 --> 00:31:08.640
 okay?

00:31:09.019 --> 00:31:09.519
 So just,

00:31:09.900 --> 00:31:10.819
 sometimes as Christians,

00:31:10.980 --> 00:31:11.440
 have you ever heard

00:31:11.440 --> 00:31:12.019
 Christians say,

00:31:12.160 --> 00:31:12.900
 marriage is not about

00:31:12.900 --> 00:31:13.299
 happiness,

00:31:13.460 --> 00:31:14.100
 it's about holiness?

00:31:14.279 --> 00:31:15.059
 Have you ever heard that?

00:31:15.840 --> 00:31:16.120
 Okay?

00:31:16.259 --> 00:31:17.019
 And that's true.

00:31:17.539 --> 00:31:18.500
 Marriage is this agent

00:31:18.500 --> 00:31:19.920
 where God sanctifies us

00:31:19.920 --> 00:31:20.960
 and He purifies us

00:31:20.960 --> 00:31:21.539
 and He makes us

00:31:21.539 --> 00:31:22.259
 more like Jesus

00:31:22.259 --> 00:31:23.420
 and He refines us.

00:31:23.480 --> 00:31:24.000
 That's true.

00:31:24.460 --> 00:31:24.640
 Okay?

00:31:24.660 --> 00:31:25.480
 It's about our holiness.

00:31:26.019 --> 00:31:27.180
 It's also about happiness.

00:31:27.319 --> 00:31:27.400
 Okay?

00:31:27.420 --> 00:31:27.900
 You are allowed

00:31:27.900 --> 00:31:28.980
 to enjoy your marriage.

00:31:28.980 --> 00:31:29.759
 You don't need

00:31:29.759 --> 00:31:30.660
 to just think like,

00:31:31.079 --> 00:31:31.460
 okay,

00:31:31.819 --> 00:31:32.539
 this is God's

00:31:32.539 --> 00:31:33.420
 sanctifying process,

00:31:33.559 --> 00:31:34.480
 I'll just get through it.

00:31:34.860 --> 00:31:35.000
 Okay?

00:31:35.039 --> 00:31:35.559
 You actually,

00:31:35.740 --> 00:31:36.680
 you should be friends.

00:31:36.759 --> 00:31:37.839
 You should laugh as well.

00:31:38.200 --> 00:31:39.180
 But it's not just

00:31:39.180 --> 00:31:39.720
 about happiness.

00:31:39.920 --> 00:31:40.400
 It's not just

00:31:40.400 --> 00:31:40.940
 about holiness.

00:31:41.480 --> 00:31:42.980
 It's also about mission.

00:31:43.680 --> 00:31:44.940
 It's about God's calling

00:31:44.940 --> 00:31:46.039
 to make the world

00:31:46.039 --> 00:31:46.920
 a better place.

00:31:47.059 --> 00:31:47.860
 And your marriage,

00:31:47.960 --> 00:31:48.620
 your union,

00:31:49.000 --> 00:31:50.059
 is God's calling

00:31:50.059 --> 00:31:51.099
 on your life

00:31:51.099 --> 00:31:53.799
 to sanctify the world

00:31:53.799 --> 00:31:54.599
 and to make the world

00:31:54.599 --> 00:31:55.500
 a better place.

00:31:55.500 --> 00:31:59.779
 And so part of this

00:31:59.779 --> 00:32:00.420
 happens through

00:32:00.420 --> 00:32:01.119
 having children

00:32:01.119 --> 00:32:02.019
 and bringing them up

00:32:02.019 --> 00:32:02.720
 in God's ways

00:32:02.720 --> 00:32:03.420
 to honor Him

00:32:03.420 --> 00:32:03.980
 and know Him.

00:32:04.539 --> 00:32:05.500
 Parenting is not just

00:32:05.500 --> 00:32:06.339
 about having children

00:32:06.339 --> 00:32:07.039
 and getting them

00:32:07.039 --> 00:32:08.019
 good education,

00:32:08.220 --> 00:32:08.960
 going to university

00:32:08.960 --> 00:32:09.619
 and then getting

00:32:09.619 --> 00:32:10.299
 a good job.

00:32:10.839 --> 00:32:11.920
 We should shape

00:32:11.920 --> 00:32:12.500
 our children

00:32:12.500 --> 00:32:13.220
 to be agents

00:32:13.220 --> 00:32:14.259
 of salt and life

00:32:14.259 --> 00:32:14.799
 in the world.

00:32:15.319 --> 00:32:16.259
 We teach our children

00:32:16.259 --> 00:32:16.839
 the gospel.

00:32:16.980 --> 00:32:17.319
 We help them

00:32:17.319 --> 00:32:18.660
 to love and trust Jesus

00:32:18.660 --> 00:32:20.039
 so that our children

00:32:20.039 --> 00:32:21.119
 become people

00:32:21.119 --> 00:32:21.940
 that bring shalom

00:32:21.940 --> 00:32:23.000
 and heaven to earth.

00:32:23.000 --> 00:32:24.200
 So marriage,

00:32:24.359 --> 00:32:25.099
 children is part

00:32:25.099 --> 00:32:25.380
 of the way

00:32:25.380 --> 00:32:26.000
 of doing that.

00:32:26.599 --> 00:32:27.279
 But the other way

00:32:27.279 --> 00:32:27.799
 we do that

00:32:27.799 --> 00:32:28.660
 is through serving

00:32:28.660 --> 00:32:30.039
 together as married couples,

00:32:30.220 --> 00:32:30.880
 seeing your marriage

00:32:30.880 --> 00:32:31.619
 as a calling,

00:32:32.059 --> 00:32:32.900
 not just to build

00:32:32.900 --> 00:32:33.420
 your kingdom

00:32:33.420 --> 00:32:34.039
 but to build

00:32:34.039 --> 00:32:34.779
 Christ's kingdom.

00:32:35.680 --> 00:32:36.740
 In the book of Acts

00:32:36.740 --> 00:32:37.839
 we see this amazing

00:32:37.839 --> 00:32:38.680
 juxtaposition

00:32:38.680 --> 00:32:39.799
 of these two couples.

00:32:40.380 --> 00:32:40.900
 The one is

00:32:40.900 --> 00:32:41.920
 in Acts chapter 5.

00:32:42.039 --> 00:32:42.539
 There's this couple

00:32:42.539 --> 00:32:44.759
 called Ananias

00:32:44.759 --> 00:32:45.480
 and Sapphira.

00:32:45.859 --> 00:32:46.160
 Do you remember

00:32:46.160 --> 00:32:46.980
 what happens to them?

00:32:47.799 --> 00:32:48.960
 They actually team

00:32:48.960 --> 00:32:49.940
 really well together.

00:32:50.079 --> 00:32:50.319
 They're actually

00:32:50.319 --> 00:32:51.220
 a pretty good team.

00:32:51.680 --> 00:32:52.319
 The problem is

00:32:52.319 --> 00:32:53.419
 that they team together

00:32:53.419 --> 00:32:54.339
 for evil, right?

00:32:54.759 --> 00:32:55.740
 So they come and collude

00:32:55.740 --> 00:32:56.259
 and they say,

00:32:56.619 --> 00:32:57.779
 listen, I've got this plan.

00:32:58.099 --> 00:32:58.859
 If we do this

00:32:58.859 --> 00:32:59.480
 and this and this

00:32:59.480 --> 00:33:00.740
 we can pretend

00:33:00.740 --> 00:33:01.779
 that we're more godly

00:33:01.779 --> 00:33:02.339
 than we are.

00:33:02.659 --> 00:33:03.779
 We will lie to the apostles.

00:33:04.000 --> 00:33:04.839
 We will lie to the church.

00:33:04.939 --> 00:33:05.679
 We will lie to God

00:33:05.679 --> 00:33:06.500
 and then we can

00:33:06.500 --> 00:33:07.700
 sort ourselves up

00:33:07.700 --> 00:33:08.599
 and promote ourselves.

00:33:09.159 --> 00:33:09.899
 And so they team

00:33:09.899 --> 00:33:10.759
 well together

00:33:10.759 --> 00:33:11.839
 but actually

00:33:11.839 --> 00:33:12.399
 for their own

00:33:12.399 --> 00:33:13.439
 self-centered agenda

00:33:13.439 --> 00:33:13.879
 and do you know

00:33:13.879 --> 00:33:14.379
 what happens?

00:33:14.960 --> 00:33:15.939
 They end up dead.

00:33:16.960 --> 00:33:18.259
 And a few chapters later

00:33:18.259 --> 00:33:19.000
 in Acts

00:33:19.000 --> 00:33:20.019
 we see this other couple

00:33:20.019 --> 00:33:21.220
 called Priscilla and Aquila.

00:33:21.220 --> 00:33:23.019
 And they team together

00:33:23.019 --> 00:33:23.500
 beautifully.

00:33:23.660 --> 00:33:24.759
 They open up their homes

00:33:24.759 --> 00:33:26.299
 in three different cities

00:33:26.299 --> 00:33:26.799
 in the world.

00:33:26.920 --> 00:33:27.420
 In Athens

00:33:27.420 --> 00:33:28.039
 and Ephesus

00:33:28.039 --> 00:33:29.299
 and I think it's in Antioch

00:33:29.299 --> 00:33:30.640
 we see them opening up

00:33:30.640 --> 00:33:31.100
 their homes

00:33:31.100 --> 00:33:31.960
 inviting people

00:33:31.960 --> 00:33:32.740
 and they teach them

00:33:32.740 --> 00:33:33.200
 the gospel.

00:33:33.360 --> 00:33:34.079
 They share together.

00:33:34.420 --> 00:33:35.000
 At one point

00:33:35.000 --> 00:33:35.920
 the wife is teaching

00:33:35.920 --> 00:33:36.620
 and then the husband

00:33:36.620 --> 00:33:37.100
 is teaching.

00:33:37.519 --> 00:33:38.319
 They actually team

00:33:38.319 --> 00:33:39.319
 together beautifully

00:33:39.319 --> 00:33:41.220
 as establish the kingdom

00:33:41.220 --> 00:33:41.519
 of God

00:33:41.519 --> 00:33:42.920
 and the church

00:33:42.920 --> 00:33:43.940
 in Acts advances

00:33:43.940 --> 00:33:45.019
 because of this couple.

00:33:45.799 --> 00:33:46.319
 Here you get

00:33:46.319 --> 00:33:47.200
 two couples

00:33:47.200 --> 00:33:48.480
 Ananias and Sapphira

00:33:48.480 --> 00:33:49.480
 Priscilla and Aquila

00:33:49.480 --> 00:33:51.160
 one for their own agenda

00:33:51.160 --> 00:33:52.000
 one for the kingdom

00:33:52.000 --> 00:33:52.579
 of God.

00:33:53.480 --> 00:33:53.720
 And friends

00:33:53.720 --> 00:33:54.519
 my prayer is that

00:33:54.519 --> 00:33:55.440
 for our church

00:33:55.440 --> 00:33:56.480
 and actually

00:33:56.480 --> 00:33:57.279
 if I can just

00:33:57.279 --> 00:33:58.620
 I know you won't

00:33:58.620 --> 00:33:59.400
 want me to do this

00:33:59.400 --> 00:34:00.059
 but I was thinking

00:34:00.059 --> 00:34:01.299
 about this this week

00:34:01.299 --> 00:34:02.180
 and I think

00:34:02.180 --> 00:34:02.920
 Franklin and Teresa

00:34:02.920 --> 00:34:03.700
 I think you're a great

00:34:03.700 --> 00:34:04.599
 example of this

00:34:04.599 --> 00:34:05.920
 of Priscilla and Aquila

00:34:05.920 --> 00:34:06.880
 opening up your homes

00:34:06.880 --> 00:34:07.559
 in all these cities

00:34:07.559 --> 00:34:07.940
 of the world

00:34:07.940 --> 00:34:08.420
 Beijing

00:34:08.420 --> 00:34:09.139
 and LA

00:34:09.139 --> 00:34:09.960
 and Hong Kong

00:34:09.960 --> 00:34:11.440
 and serving together

00:34:11.440 --> 00:34:12.440
 and teaming together

00:34:12.440 --> 00:34:12.940
 beautifully.

00:34:13.740 --> 00:34:14.740
 And maybe that we see

00:34:14.740 --> 00:34:15.300
 our marriages

00:34:15.300 --> 00:34:16.340
 like that

00:34:16.340 --> 00:34:17.159
 as well.

00:34:17.159 --> 00:34:18.639
 So this is God's purpose

00:34:18.639 --> 00:34:19.639
 there's lots of other

00:34:19.639 --> 00:34:20.299
 things to be said

00:34:20.299 --> 00:34:21.359
 but one of them

00:34:21.359 --> 00:34:22.179
 is that our marriages

00:34:22.179 --> 00:34:23.420
 is not just happiness

00:34:23.420 --> 00:34:24.420
 it's not just holiness

00:34:24.420 --> 00:34:25.460
 it's mission

00:34:25.460 --> 00:34:26.339
 to see the kingdom

00:34:26.339 --> 00:34:26.879
 of God

00:34:26.879 --> 00:34:28.299
 come to earth.

00:34:29.339 --> 00:34:30.219
 Then there's another

00:34:30.219 --> 00:34:31.319
 purpose for our marriage

00:34:31.319 --> 00:34:32.699
 and this stands

00:34:32.699 --> 00:34:33.859
 in direct contrast

00:34:33.859 --> 00:34:35.000
 with the consumeristic

00:34:35.000 --> 00:34:36.279
 view of our modern culture

00:34:36.279 --> 00:34:37.599
 and that is that

00:34:37.599 --> 00:34:38.559
 marriage is one way

00:34:38.559 --> 00:34:39.719
 to know and experience

00:34:39.719 --> 00:34:40.440
 grace

00:34:40.440 --> 00:34:42.119
 and I've called this

00:34:42.119 --> 00:34:43.099
 actually the pattern

00:34:43.099 --> 00:34:43.920
 for marriage.

00:34:45.139 --> 00:34:45.980
 Many years ago

00:34:45.980 --> 00:34:47.400
 when soon after

00:34:47.400 --> 00:34:47.960
 Claire and I

00:34:47.960 --> 00:34:49.340
 got engaged

00:34:49.340 --> 00:34:49.880
 or married

00:34:49.880 --> 00:34:50.719
 there were some

00:34:50.719 --> 00:34:51.500
 very good friends

00:34:51.500 --> 00:34:51.900
 of ours

00:34:51.900 --> 00:34:52.400
 who were looking

00:34:52.400 --> 00:34:53.240
 to get engaged

00:34:53.240 --> 00:34:55.599
 and I remember

00:34:55.599 --> 00:34:56.300
 the guy

00:34:56.300 --> 00:34:57.260
 saying

00:34:57.260 --> 00:34:58.079
 or telling me

00:34:58.079 --> 00:34:58.519
 the story

00:34:58.519 --> 00:34:59.360
 retrospectively

00:34:59.360 --> 00:35:00.059
 but he wanted

00:35:00.059 --> 00:35:00.760
 to propose

00:35:00.760 --> 00:35:01.300
 to his girlfriend

00:35:01.300 --> 00:35:03.400
 but he had become

00:35:03.400 --> 00:35:03.840
 a Christian

00:35:03.840 --> 00:35:04.599
 kind of a little bit

00:35:04.599 --> 00:35:06.039
 later in life

00:35:06.039 --> 00:35:06.699
 at university

00:35:06.699 --> 00:35:08.139
 and there's a whole

00:35:08.139 --> 00:35:08.760
 lot of history

00:35:08.760 --> 00:35:09.460
 in his life

00:35:09.460 --> 00:35:10.780
 and he thought

00:35:10.780 --> 00:35:11.960
 before I get

00:35:11.960 --> 00:35:12.559
 into marriage

00:35:12.559 --> 00:35:13.460
 I've got to

00:35:13.460 --> 00:35:14.599
 tell my girlfriend

00:35:14.599 --> 00:35:15.340
 what she's getting

00:35:15.340 --> 00:35:15.940
 into right

00:35:15.940 --> 00:35:16.780
 if we're going

00:35:16.780 --> 00:35:17.180
 to be a one

00:35:17.180 --> 00:35:17.860
 flesh union

00:35:17.860 --> 00:35:19.039
 I don't want

00:35:19.039 --> 00:35:19.480
 her finding

00:35:19.480 --> 00:35:19.980
 out later

00:35:19.980 --> 00:35:20.800
 all this stuff

00:35:20.800 --> 00:35:22.200
 and so he

00:35:22.200 --> 00:35:23.059
 summons up

00:35:23.059 --> 00:35:23.780
 all this courage

00:35:23.780 --> 00:35:24.760
 and he said

00:35:24.760 --> 00:35:24.980
 to her

00:35:24.980 --> 00:35:25.160
 listen

00:35:25.160 --> 00:35:26.519
 I want to tell

00:35:26.519 --> 00:35:26.840
 you some

00:35:26.840 --> 00:35:27.300
 of my life

00:35:27.300 --> 00:35:27.660
 story

00:35:27.660 --> 00:35:28.059
 and some

00:35:28.059 --> 00:35:28.640
 of the mess

00:35:28.640 --> 00:35:29.880
 and the pain

00:35:29.880 --> 00:35:30.380
 involved

00:35:30.380 --> 00:35:31.840
 and so they

00:35:31.840 --> 00:35:32.579
 have this

00:35:32.579 --> 00:35:33.980
 discussion

00:35:33.980 --> 00:35:34.539
 one night

00:35:34.539 --> 00:35:34.920
 and he says

00:35:34.920 --> 00:35:35.160
 listen

00:35:35.160 --> 00:35:35.600
 this is where

00:35:35.600 --> 00:35:36.240
 God has taken

00:35:36.240 --> 00:35:36.539
 me

00:35:36.539 --> 00:35:37.579
 this is what's

00:35:37.579 --> 00:35:37.900
 happened

00:35:37.900 --> 00:35:38.519
 this is where

00:35:38.519 --> 00:35:38.960
 I've had to

00:35:38.960 --> 00:35:39.460
 repent

00:35:39.460 --> 00:35:40.360
 so I have to

00:35:40.360 --> 00:35:40.780
 bring God

00:35:40.780 --> 00:35:41.380
 into my life

00:35:41.380 --> 00:35:42.280
 and I want

00:35:42.280 --> 00:35:42.820
 you to know

00:35:42.820 --> 00:35:43.320
 some of my

00:35:43.320 --> 00:35:43.740
 stories

00:35:43.740 --> 00:35:44.420
 that if we get

00:35:44.420 --> 00:35:44.820
 married

00:35:44.820 --> 00:35:45.800
 you know

00:35:45.800 --> 00:35:46.539
 the best

00:35:46.539 --> 00:35:46.960
 and the worst

00:35:46.960 --> 00:35:47.320
 of me

00:35:47.320 --> 00:35:48.460
 and he said

00:35:48.460 --> 00:35:49.139
 it was the scariest

00:35:49.139 --> 00:35:49.920
 night of his life

00:35:49.920 --> 00:35:51.039
 because he wanted

00:35:51.039 --> 00:35:51.639
 to marry her

00:35:51.639 --> 00:35:52.159
 but he also

00:35:52.159 --> 00:35:52.599
 didn't know

00:35:52.599 --> 00:35:53.000
 what is she

00:35:53.000 --> 00:35:53.539
 going to think

00:35:53.539 --> 00:35:54.539
 is she going

00:35:54.539 --> 00:35:54.920
 to say

00:35:54.920 --> 00:35:55.380
 listen

00:35:55.380 --> 00:35:55.780
 you're too

00:35:55.780 --> 00:35:56.240
 damaged

00:35:56.240 --> 00:35:56.639
 you're too

00:35:56.639 --> 00:35:57.019
 broken

00:35:57.019 --> 00:35:57.320
 I don't

00:35:57.320 --> 00:35:57.500
 want to

00:35:57.500 --> 00:35:57.820
 marry you

00:35:57.820 --> 00:35:58.119
 anymore

00:35:58.119 --> 00:35:59.280
 and so he

00:35:59.280 --> 00:36:00.019
 tells her

00:36:00.019 --> 00:36:00.320
 everything

00:36:00.320 --> 00:36:01.079
 and she says

00:36:01.079 --> 00:36:01.940
 listen

00:36:01.940 --> 00:36:02.480
 I need some

00:36:02.480 --> 00:36:02.800
 time to

00:36:02.800 --> 00:36:03.599
 process this

00:36:03.599 --> 00:36:04.500
 and so they

00:36:04.500 --> 00:36:05.220
 go home

00:36:05.220 --> 00:36:05.539
 to their

00:36:05.539 --> 00:36:06.180
 own respective

00:36:06.180 --> 00:36:06.599
 homes

00:36:06.599 --> 00:36:07.380
 and he says

00:36:07.380 --> 00:36:07.800
 he doesn't

00:36:07.800 --> 00:36:08.500
 sleep that night

00:36:08.500 --> 00:36:08.720
 right

00:36:08.720 --> 00:36:09.039
 it's like

00:36:09.039 --> 00:36:09.740
 he's just

00:36:09.740 --> 00:36:10.659
 thinking over

00:36:10.659 --> 00:36:11.200
 his mind

00:36:11.200 --> 00:36:11.800
 is she still

00:36:11.800 --> 00:36:11.980
 going to

00:36:11.980 --> 00:36:12.380
 want to marry

00:36:12.380 --> 00:36:12.660
 me

00:36:12.660 --> 00:36:14.019
 and the next

00:36:14.019 --> 00:36:14.360
 day they

00:36:14.360 --> 00:36:14.940
 come together

00:36:14.940 --> 00:36:15.400
 and she's

00:36:15.400 --> 00:36:15.880
 written him

00:36:15.880 --> 00:36:16.340
 a letter

00:36:16.340 --> 00:36:18.140
 and he opens

00:36:18.140 --> 00:36:18.700
 up the letter

00:36:18.700 --> 00:36:19.400
 and this is

00:36:19.400 --> 00:36:19.780
 what she

00:36:19.780 --> 00:36:20.140
 says

00:36:20.140 --> 00:36:21.880
 something to

00:36:21.880 --> 00:36:22.480
 this effect

00:36:22.480 --> 00:36:24.160
 she says

00:36:24.159 --> 00:36:27.079
 I choose

00:36:27.079 --> 00:36:27.839
 to love you

00:36:27.839 --> 00:36:28.980
 the way

00:36:28.980 --> 00:36:29.500
 that Christ

00:36:29.500 --> 00:36:29.899
 has loved

00:36:29.899 --> 00:36:30.179
 me

00:36:30.179 --> 00:36:31.420
 with all

00:36:31.420 --> 00:36:32.179
 my failings

00:36:32.179 --> 00:36:32.500
 and all

00:36:32.500 --> 00:36:33.339
 my shortcomings

00:36:33.339 --> 00:36:35.179
 Christ's love

00:36:35.179 --> 00:36:35.879
 has washed

00:36:35.879 --> 00:36:36.579
 over me

00:36:36.579 --> 00:36:38.019
 in such a way

00:36:38.019 --> 00:36:38.440
 that he's not

00:36:38.440 --> 00:36:39.099
 only forgiven

00:36:39.099 --> 00:36:39.920
 me but he's

00:36:39.920 --> 00:36:40.579
 also changing

00:36:40.579 --> 00:36:40.899
 me

00:36:40.899 --> 00:36:42.379
 and Christ's

00:36:42.379 --> 00:36:42.960
 love is busy

00:36:42.960 --> 00:36:43.940
 sanctifying me

00:36:43.940 --> 00:36:44.759
 and redeeming

00:36:44.759 --> 00:36:45.059
 me

00:36:45.059 --> 00:36:46.639
 and as Christ's

00:36:46.639 --> 00:36:47.259
 love has washed

00:36:47.259 --> 00:36:47.859
 over me

00:36:47.859 --> 00:36:49.059
 he's making me

00:36:49.059 --> 00:36:49.559
 the kind of

00:36:49.559 --> 00:36:50.559
 person that can

00:36:50.559 --> 00:36:51.179
 love others

00:36:51.179 --> 00:36:52.739
 and as I love

00:36:52.739 --> 00:36:53.399
 you that way

00:36:53.400 --> 00:36:54.079
 and you love

00:36:54.079 --> 00:36:54.280
 me

00:36:54.280 --> 00:36:54.900
 as we work

00:36:54.900 --> 00:36:55.680
 towards marriage

00:36:55.680 --> 00:36:56.380
 with that kind

00:36:56.380 --> 00:36:56.880
 of love

00:36:56.880 --> 00:36:58.119
 God's going to

00:36:58.119 --> 00:36:58.639
 heal us

00:36:58.639 --> 00:36:59.619
 and restore us

00:36:59.619 --> 00:37:00.460
 and going to

00:37:00.460 --> 00:37:00.920
 make us the

00:37:00.920 --> 00:37:01.460
 kind of people

00:37:01.460 --> 00:37:02.039
 that can love

00:37:02.039 --> 00:37:02.380
 each other

00:37:02.380 --> 00:37:02.900
 selflessly

00:37:02.900 --> 00:37:03.440
 and love

00:37:03.440 --> 00:37:03.880
 this broken

00:37:03.880 --> 00:37:04.300
 world

00:37:04.300 --> 00:37:06.500
 do you see

00:37:06.500 --> 00:37:06.880
 what she's

00:37:06.880 --> 00:37:07.360
 doing there

00:37:07.360 --> 00:37:09.180
 she's directly

00:37:09.180 --> 00:37:10.000
 applying the

00:37:10.000 --> 00:37:10.619
 gospel of

00:37:10.619 --> 00:37:11.400
 God's grace

00:37:11.400 --> 00:37:12.460
 to this

00:37:12.460 --> 00:37:13.039
 relationship

00:37:13.039 --> 00:37:13.660
 and saying

00:37:13.660 --> 00:37:14.639
 the foundation

00:37:14.639 --> 00:37:15.019
 of this

00:37:15.019 --> 00:37:15.480
 relationship

00:37:15.480 --> 00:37:16.660
 has got to

00:37:16.660 --> 00:37:17.099
 be the love

00:37:17.099 --> 00:37:17.680
 that we see

00:37:17.680 --> 00:37:18.539
 in the gospel

00:37:18.539 --> 00:37:20.360
 and that's

00:37:20.360 --> 00:37:20.780
 what the New

00:37:20.780 --> 00:37:21.519
 Testament says

00:37:21.519 --> 00:37:22.300
 again and

00:37:22.300 --> 00:37:22.840
 again and

00:37:22.840 --> 00:37:23.160
 again

00:37:23.159 --> 00:37:23.579
 it says

00:37:23.579 --> 00:37:24.259
 that Christian

00:37:24.259 --> 00:37:24.879
 marriage

00:37:24.879 --> 00:37:26.059
 is built

00:37:26.059 --> 00:37:26.299
 on

00:37:26.299 --> 00:37:26.980
 patterned

00:37:26.980 --> 00:37:27.219
 on

00:37:27.219 --> 00:37:28.379
 God's

00:37:28.379 --> 00:37:28.960
 profound

00:37:28.960 --> 00:37:29.539
 love for

00:37:29.539 --> 00:37:29.819
 us

00:37:29.819 --> 00:37:30.659
 in the gospel

00:37:30.659 --> 00:37:32.440
 that Christian

00:37:32.440 --> 00:37:33.039
 marriage is

00:37:33.039 --> 00:37:33.639
 both meant to

00:37:33.639 --> 00:37:34.199
 pattern

00:37:34.199 --> 00:37:34.980
 to picture

00:37:34.980 --> 00:37:35.739
 to others

00:37:35.739 --> 00:37:36.920
 but also to

00:37:36.920 --> 00:37:37.759
 picture ourselves

00:37:37.759 --> 00:37:38.659
 the grace of

00:37:38.659 --> 00:37:39.219
 God in the

00:37:39.219 --> 00:37:39.559
 gospel

00:37:39.559 --> 00:37:40.779
 that's what

00:37:40.779 --> 00:37:41.619
 Paul says to

00:37:41.619 --> 00:37:42.679
 married couples

00:37:42.679 --> 00:37:43.420
 in Ephesians 5

00:37:43.420 --> 00:37:43.739
 he says

00:37:43.739 --> 00:37:44.839
 husbands love

00:37:44.839 --> 00:37:45.739
 your wives

00:37:45.739 --> 00:37:46.719
 the way that

00:37:46.719 --> 00:37:47.619
 Christ loved

00:37:47.619 --> 00:37:48.199
 the church

00:37:48.199 --> 00:37:50.639
 we took

00:37:50.639 --> 00:37:51.000
 communion

00:37:51.000 --> 00:37:51.359
 earlier

00:37:51.359 --> 00:37:51.759
 and Dan

00:37:51.759 --> 00:37:52.099
 led us

00:37:52.099 --> 00:37:52.599
 so well

00:37:52.599 --> 00:37:53.579
 that Jesus

00:37:53.579 --> 00:37:54.139
 on the night

00:37:54.139 --> 00:37:54.639
 before he was

00:37:54.639 --> 00:37:54.919
 betrayed

00:37:54.919 --> 00:37:55.579
 he knew

00:37:55.579 --> 00:37:55.939
 what was

00:37:55.939 --> 00:37:56.139
 going to

00:37:56.139 --> 00:37:56.460
 happen

00:37:56.460 --> 00:37:57.480
 Jesus

00:37:57.480 --> 00:37:57.939
 was going

00:37:57.939 --> 00:37:58.179
 to have

00:37:58.179 --> 00:37:59.500
 his body

00:37:59.500 --> 00:38:00.039
 nailed to

00:38:00.039 --> 00:38:00.339
 the cross

00:38:00.339 --> 00:38:00.759
 Jesus

00:38:00.759 --> 00:38:01.139
 was going

00:38:01.139 --> 00:38:01.299
 to have

00:38:01.299 --> 00:38:01.759
 his body

00:38:01.759 --> 00:38:02.460
 broken

00:38:02.460 --> 00:38:03.739
 week in and

00:38:03.739 --> 00:38:04.079
 week out

00:38:04.079 --> 00:38:04.559
 we take

00:38:04.559 --> 00:38:04.939
 communion

00:38:04.939 --> 00:38:05.619
 to remind

00:38:05.619 --> 00:38:06.039
 us of

00:38:06.039 --> 00:38:06.699
 Christ's

00:38:06.699 --> 00:38:07.500
 unbelievable

00:38:07.500 --> 00:38:08.219
 day by

00:38:08.219 --> 00:38:08.960
 day mercy

00:38:08.960 --> 00:38:09.460
 and grace

00:38:09.460 --> 00:38:09.939
 for us

00:38:09.940 --> 00:38:11.280
 and Jesus

00:38:11.280 --> 00:38:11.559
 says

00:38:11.559 --> 00:38:11.980
 husbands

00:38:11.980 --> 00:38:12.480
 love your

00:38:12.480 --> 00:38:12.740
 wives

00:38:12.740 --> 00:38:13.139
 the same

00:38:13.139 --> 00:38:13.420
 way

00:38:13.420 --> 00:38:14.460
 and Jesus

00:38:14.460 --> 00:38:14.659
 says

00:38:14.659 --> 00:38:15.179
 wives

00:38:15.179 --> 00:38:15.539
 as you

00:38:15.539 --> 00:38:15.900
 relate to

00:38:15.900 --> 00:38:16.280
 husbands

00:38:16.280 --> 00:38:16.740
 let it

00:38:16.740 --> 00:38:17.039
 be the

00:38:17.039 --> 00:38:17.340
 same

00:38:17.340 --> 00:38:18.460
 let the

00:38:18.460 --> 00:38:18.840
 gospel

00:38:18.840 --> 00:38:19.119
 the

00:38:19.119 --> 00:38:20.039
 unconditional

00:38:20.039 --> 00:38:21.079
 sacrificial

00:38:21.079 --> 00:38:21.920
 unmerited

00:38:21.920 --> 00:38:22.720
 grace of

00:38:22.720 --> 00:38:23.099
 God

00:38:23.099 --> 00:38:24.960
 that Christ

00:38:24.960 --> 00:38:25.400
 has for

00:38:25.400 --> 00:38:25.700
 us

00:38:25.700 --> 00:38:26.240
 let that

00:38:26.240 --> 00:38:26.599
 be the

00:38:26.599 --> 00:38:27.000
 pattern

00:38:27.000 --> 00:38:27.340
 and the

00:38:27.340 --> 00:38:27.659
 picture

00:38:27.659 --> 00:38:28.579
 of our

00:38:28.579 --> 00:38:29.079
 relationships

00:38:29.079 --> 00:38:29.740
 as well

00:38:29.740 --> 00:38:31.500
 Christian

00:38:31.500 --> 00:38:31.840
 marriage

00:38:31.840 --> 00:38:32.200
 is meant

00:38:32.200 --> 00:38:33.019
 to reveal

00:38:33.019 --> 00:38:33.579
 the gospel

00:38:33.579 --> 00:38:34.039
 and God's

00:38:34.039 --> 00:38:34.260
 grace

00:38:34.260 --> 00:38:34.920
 to ourselves

00:38:34.920 --> 00:38:35.460
 and also

00:38:35.460 --> 00:38:36.139
 to those

00:38:36.139 --> 00:38:36.860
 that are

00:38:36.860 --> 00:38:37.260
 watching

00:38:37.260 --> 00:38:38.000
 those outside

00:38:38.000 --> 00:38:38.920
 as they

00:38:38.920 --> 00:38:39.659
 see the

00:38:39.659 --> 00:38:40.399
 day by

00:38:40.399 --> 00:38:41.099
 day mercies

00:38:41.099 --> 00:38:41.639
 of God

00:38:41.639 --> 00:38:42.619
 they see

00:38:42.619 --> 00:38:43.339
 unconditional

00:38:43.339 --> 00:38:44.399
 sacrificial

00:38:44.399 --> 00:38:45.379
 unmerited

00:38:45.379 --> 00:38:46.539
 the love

00:38:46.539 --> 00:38:47.500
 that Christ

00:38:47.500 --> 00:38:48.159
 has for us

00:38:48.159 --> 00:38:48.440
 on our

00:38:48.440 --> 00:38:49.000
 worst days

00:38:49.000 --> 00:38:49.420
 and on our

00:38:49.420 --> 00:38:50.099
 best days

00:38:50.099 --> 00:38:51.019
 when the

00:38:51.019 --> 00:38:51.639
 world sees

00:38:51.639 --> 00:38:51.960
 that it

00:38:51.960 --> 00:38:52.500
 will show

00:38:52.500 --> 00:38:52.739
 us a

00:38:52.739 --> 00:38:53.019
 picture

00:38:53.019 --> 00:38:54.039
 of grace

00:38:54.039 --> 00:38:55.039
 you know

00:38:55.039 --> 00:38:55.440
 the Bible

00:38:55.440 --> 00:38:56.139
 says that

00:38:56.139 --> 00:38:57.619
 the Bible

00:38:57.619 --> 00:38:58.139
 starts off

00:38:58.139 --> 00:38:58.339
 with the

00:38:58.339 --> 00:38:58.599
 marriage

00:38:58.599 --> 00:38:59.099
 in Genesis

00:38:59.099 --> 00:38:59.440
 2

00:38:59.440 --> 00:38:59.839
 and it

00:38:59.839 --> 00:39:00.279
 ends off

00:39:00.279 --> 00:39:00.719
 the marriage

00:39:00.719 --> 00:39:01.199
 in Revelation

00:39:01.199 --> 00:39:01.779
 21

00:39:01.779 --> 00:39:02.779
 and the

00:39:02.779 --> 00:39:03.000
 marriage

00:39:03.000 --> 00:39:03.219
 at the

00:39:03.219 --> 00:39:03.339
 end

00:39:03.339 --> 00:39:03.500
 of the

00:39:03.500 --> 00:39:03.759
 Bible

00:39:03.759 --> 00:39:04.319
 is how

00:39:04.319 --> 00:39:04.940
 Christ

00:39:04.940 --> 00:39:05.339
 is pictured

00:39:05.339 --> 00:39:05.639
 as the

00:39:05.639 --> 00:39:06.119
 bridegroom

00:39:06.119 --> 00:39:06.480
 and the

00:39:06.480 --> 00:39:06.859
 church

00:39:06.859 --> 00:39:07.279
 is the

00:39:07.279 --> 00:39:07.559
 bride

00:39:07.559 --> 00:39:07.940
 and God

00:39:07.940 --> 00:39:08.399
 says we're

00:39:08.399 --> 00:39:08.679
 going to be

00:39:08.679 --> 00:39:09.339
 united

00:39:09.340 --> 00:39:10.340
 like a

00:39:10.340 --> 00:39:10.539
 married

00:39:10.539 --> 00:39:10.900
 couple

00:39:10.900 --> 00:39:12.480
 but Jesus

00:39:12.480 --> 00:39:13.240
 doesn't marry

00:39:13.240 --> 00:39:13.840
 us because

00:39:13.840 --> 00:39:14.480
 we're perfectly

00:39:14.480 --> 00:39:15.240
 compatible with

00:39:15.240 --> 00:39:15.380
 him

00:39:15.380 --> 00:39:16.820
 Jesus doesn't

00:39:16.820 --> 00:39:17.200
 look at us

00:39:17.200 --> 00:39:17.720
 and say hey

00:39:17.720 --> 00:39:18.019
 I think

00:39:18.019 --> 00:39:18.579
 emotionally

00:39:18.579 --> 00:39:19.680
 vocationally

00:39:19.680 --> 00:39:20.460
 you know

00:39:20.460 --> 00:39:21.500
 good socioeconomic

00:39:21.500 --> 00:39:21.880
 status

00:39:21.880 --> 00:39:22.260
 we're going to

00:39:22.260 --> 00:39:22.780
 be a good

00:39:22.780 --> 00:39:23.200
 match

00:39:23.200 --> 00:39:24.940
 Jesus marries

00:39:24.940 --> 00:39:25.579
 us not

00:39:25.579 --> 00:39:26.140
 because of

00:39:26.140 --> 00:39:26.800
 how lovely

00:39:26.800 --> 00:39:27.280
 we are

00:39:27.280 --> 00:39:27.740
 but because

00:39:27.740 --> 00:39:28.160
 of the love

00:39:28.160 --> 00:39:28.680
 in his own

00:39:28.680 --> 00:39:29.120
 heart that

00:39:29.120 --> 00:39:29.760
 he pours out

00:39:29.760 --> 00:39:30.260
 for us

00:39:30.260 --> 00:39:31.519
 and Jesus

00:39:31.519 --> 00:39:32.240
 says to us

00:39:32.240 --> 00:39:32.780
 that that is

00:39:32.780 --> 00:39:33.240
 the picture

00:39:33.240 --> 00:39:33.840
 and the pattern

00:39:33.840 --> 00:39:34.519
 of marriage

00:39:34.519 --> 00:39:34.980
 as well

00:39:34.980 --> 00:39:35.860
 and so

00:39:35.860 --> 00:39:36.219
 what that

00:39:36.219 --> 00:39:36.599
 means is

00:39:36.599 --> 00:39:37.039
 that until

00:39:37.039 --> 00:39:37.679
 we understand

00:39:37.679 --> 00:39:38.119
 God's

00:39:38.119 --> 00:39:38.679
 eternal

00:39:38.679 --> 00:39:39.519
 unconditional

00:39:39.519 --> 00:39:40.500
 unmerited

00:39:40.500 --> 00:39:41.380
 sacrificial

00:39:41.380 --> 00:39:41.900
 love for

00:39:41.900 --> 00:39:42.340
 those of us

00:39:42.340 --> 00:39:42.559
 that are

00:39:42.559 --> 00:39:43.039
 in Christ

00:39:43.039 --> 00:39:43.820
 we will

00:39:43.820 --> 00:39:44.099
 never

00:39:44.099 --> 00:39:44.579
 understand

00:39:44.579 --> 00:39:45.159
 the pattern

00:39:45.159 --> 00:39:45.500
 and the

00:39:45.500 --> 00:39:45.820
 picture

00:39:45.820 --> 00:39:46.519
 of marriage

00:39:46.519 --> 00:39:46.860
 that God

00:39:46.860 --> 00:39:47.460
 has for

00:39:47.460 --> 00:39:47.780
 us

00:39:47.780 --> 00:39:49.059
 but there's

00:39:49.059 --> 00:39:49.579
 something else

00:39:49.579 --> 00:39:49.960
 about the

00:39:49.960 --> 00:39:50.280
 gospel

00:39:50.280 --> 00:39:51.699
 and that is

00:39:51.699 --> 00:39:52.340
 that God's

00:39:52.340 --> 00:39:52.900
 grace doesn't

00:39:52.900 --> 00:39:53.559
 only forgive

00:39:53.559 --> 00:39:53.920
 us

00:39:53.920 --> 00:39:54.940
 it also

00:39:54.940 --> 00:39:55.860
 heals

00:39:55.860 --> 00:39:56.219
 us

00:39:56.219 --> 00:39:56.659
 it also

00:39:56.659 --> 00:39:57.199
 changes

00:39:57.199 --> 00:39:57.639
 us

00:39:57.639 --> 00:39:58.500
 in the

00:39:58.500 --> 00:39:58.900
 language of

00:39:58.900 --> 00:39:59.260
 the Bible

00:39:59.260 --> 00:40:00.059
 God's grace

00:40:00.059 --> 00:40:01.139
 also redeems

00:40:01.139 --> 00:40:01.599
 us

00:40:01.599 --> 00:40:02.839
 it takes

00:40:02.839 --> 00:40:03.239
 that which

00:40:03.239 --> 00:40:03.759
 is broken

00:40:03.759 --> 00:40:04.500
 and flawed

00:40:04.500 --> 00:40:05.380
 sometimes

00:40:05.380 --> 00:40:05.920
 dead

00:40:05.920 --> 00:40:06.960
 and revives

00:40:06.960 --> 00:40:07.279
 us and

00:40:07.279 --> 00:40:07.679
 makes us

00:40:07.679 --> 00:40:08.259
 new again

00:40:08.259 --> 00:40:09.799
 and do you

00:40:09.799 --> 00:40:09.980
 know what

00:40:09.980 --> 00:40:10.500
 that means

00:40:10.500 --> 00:40:11.000
 it means

00:40:11.000 --> 00:40:11.599
 no matter

00:40:11.599 --> 00:40:12.319
 how bad

00:40:12.319 --> 00:40:12.739
 your marriage

00:40:12.739 --> 00:40:13.000
 is

00:40:13.000 --> 00:40:13.860
 no matter

00:40:13.860 --> 00:40:14.619
 how flawed

00:40:14.619 --> 00:40:14.980
 it is

00:40:14.980 --> 00:40:15.699
 how broken

00:40:15.699 --> 00:40:16.259
 it is

00:40:16.259 --> 00:40:17.599
 no marriage

00:40:17.599 --> 00:40:18.119
 is beyond

00:40:18.119 --> 00:40:18.579
 redemption

00:40:18.579 --> 00:40:19.880
 no marriage

00:40:19.880 --> 00:40:20.319
 is beyond

00:40:20.319 --> 00:40:20.659
 healing

00:40:20.659 --> 00:40:21.519
 because the

00:40:21.519 --> 00:40:22.259
 very pattern

00:40:22.259 --> 00:40:22.860
 of marriage

00:40:22.860 --> 00:40:23.639
 is the grace

00:40:23.639 --> 00:40:24.039
 of God

00:40:24.039 --> 00:40:24.719
 that heals

00:40:24.719 --> 00:40:25.139
 and takes

00:40:25.139 --> 00:40:25.980
 broken things

00:40:25.980 --> 00:40:26.319
 and makes

00:40:26.319 --> 00:40:26.699
 them whole

00:40:26.699 --> 00:40:26.980
 again

00:40:26.980 --> 00:40:27.779
 that takes

00:40:27.779 --> 00:40:28.219
 ashes

00:40:28.219 --> 00:40:29.000
 and transforms

00:40:29.000 --> 00:40:29.380
 them into

00:40:29.380 --> 00:40:29.699
 beauty

00:40:29.699 --> 00:40:30.139
 that takes

00:40:30.139 --> 00:40:30.639
 mourning

00:40:30.639 --> 00:40:31.539
 and transforms

00:40:31.539 --> 00:40:32.099
 it into

00:40:32.099 --> 00:40:32.719
 rejoicing

00:40:32.719 --> 00:40:33.679
 the heart

00:40:33.679 --> 00:40:33.900
 of the

00:40:33.900 --> 00:40:34.199
 gospel

00:40:34.199 --> 00:40:34.440
 is that

00:40:34.440 --> 00:40:34.639
 God

00:40:34.639 --> 00:40:34.920
 takes

00:40:34.920 --> 00:40:35.259
 that

00:40:35.259 --> 00:40:35.519
 which

00:40:35.519 --> 00:40:35.739
 is

00:40:35.739 --> 00:40:36.679
 beyond

00:40:36.679 --> 00:40:37.460
 disrepair

00:40:37.460 --> 00:40:38.259
 and he

00:40:38.259 --> 00:40:38.619
 heals

00:40:38.619 --> 00:40:39.179
 and revives

00:40:39.179 --> 00:40:39.420
 it and

00:40:39.420 --> 00:40:39.759
 makes it

00:40:39.759 --> 00:40:40.219
 new again

00:40:40.219 --> 00:40:41.099
 as a

00:40:41.099 --> 00:40:41.259
 friends

00:40:41.259 --> 00:40:41.619
 I don't

00:40:41.619 --> 00:40:42.079
 know what

00:40:42.079 --> 00:40:42.559
 your marriage

00:40:42.559 --> 00:40:42.880
 is like

00:40:42.880 --> 00:40:43.279
 it could

00:40:43.279 --> 00:40:43.739
 be great

00:40:43.739 --> 00:40:44.039
 it could

00:40:44.039 --> 00:40:44.559
 be terrible

00:40:44.559 --> 00:40:45.539
 you could

00:40:45.539 --> 00:40:45.719
 have

00:40:45.719 --> 00:40:46.159
 gone

00:40:46.159 --> 00:40:46.340
 through

00:40:46.340 --> 00:40:46.759
 the most

00:40:46.759 --> 00:40:47.900
 intense

00:40:47.900 --> 00:40:48.920
 trust

00:40:48.920 --> 00:40:49.539
 breaking

00:40:49.539 --> 00:40:50.480
 difficulty

00:40:50.480 --> 00:40:51.800
 no marriage

00:40:51.800 --> 00:40:52.340
 is beyond

00:40:52.340 --> 00:40:53.019
 redemption

00:40:53.019 --> 00:40:54.179
 because the

00:40:54.179 --> 00:40:54.559
 gospel

00:40:54.559 --> 00:40:55.500
 always gives

00:40:55.500 --> 00:40:56.019
 us hope

00:40:56.019 --> 00:40:59.079
 I want us

00:40:59.079 --> 00:40:59.460
 to land

00:40:59.460 --> 00:41:00.000
 with one

00:41:00.000 --> 00:41:01.039
 brief

00:41:01.039 --> 00:41:01.659
 application

00:41:01.659 --> 00:41:02.759
 so what

00:41:02.759 --> 00:41:03.099
 does this

00:41:03.099 --> 00:41:03.519
 all mean

00:41:03.519 --> 00:41:04.599
 and I

00:41:04.599 --> 00:41:04.820
 want to

00:41:04.820 --> 00:41:05.300
 apply this

00:41:05.300 --> 00:41:05.719
 to both

00:41:05.719 --> 00:41:06.179
 those of us

00:41:06.179 --> 00:41:06.440
 that are

00:41:06.440 --> 00:41:06.759
 married

00:41:06.759 --> 00:41:07.119
 and those

00:41:07.119 --> 00:41:07.360
 of us

00:41:07.360 --> 00:41:07.619
 that are

00:41:07.619 --> 00:41:07.860
 not

00:41:07.860 --> 00:41:08.239
 married

00:41:08.239 --> 00:41:09.420
 about

00:41:09.420 --> 00:41:10.099
 10 years

00:41:10.099 --> 00:41:10.480
 ago

00:41:10.480 --> 00:41:11.539
 Claire and I

00:41:11.539 --> 00:41:12.119
 knew a couple

00:41:12.119 --> 00:41:13.239
 that were in

00:41:13.239 --> 00:41:13.579
 the same

00:41:13.579 --> 00:41:13.980
 church

00:41:13.980 --> 00:41:14.500
 and they

00:41:14.500 --> 00:41:14.900
 were quite

00:41:14.900 --> 00:41:15.440
 involved in

00:41:15.440 --> 00:41:15.779
 church

00:41:15.779 --> 00:41:16.800
 and their

00:41:16.800 --> 00:41:17.219
 marriage

00:41:17.219 --> 00:41:18.199
 very painfully

00:41:18.199 --> 00:41:18.900
 came to an

00:41:18.900 --> 00:41:19.039
 end

00:41:19.039 --> 00:41:19.900
 ended up in

00:41:19.900 --> 00:41:20.320
 divorce

00:41:20.320 --> 00:41:21.279
 very very

00:41:21.279 --> 00:41:21.779
 painfully

00:41:21.779 --> 00:41:23.800
 and I was

00:41:23.800 --> 00:41:24.219
 talking to the

00:41:24.219 --> 00:41:24.639
 guy about

00:41:24.639 --> 00:41:25.179
 six months

00:41:25.179 --> 00:41:25.579
 to a year

00:41:25.579 --> 00:41:25.980
 later

00:41:25.980 --> 00:41:27.079
 and one of the

00:41:27.079 --> 00:41:27.360
 things that

00:41:27.360 --> 00:41:28.300
 was so confusing

00:41:28.300 --> 00:41:29.039
 for him

00:41:29.039 --> 00:41:30.200
 was that he

00:41:30.200 --> 00:41:30.960
 said we did

00:41:30.960 --> 00:41:31.960
 everything God's

00:41:31.960 --> 00:41:32.260
 way

00:41:32.260 --> 00:41:32.720
 right

00:41:32.720 --> 00:41:33.600
 we didn't live

00:41:33.600 --> 00:41:34.200
 together before

00:41:34.200 --> 00:41:34.760
 we were married

00:41:34.760 --> 00:41:35.500
 we didn't sleep

00:41:35.500 --> 00:41:36.100
 together before

00:41:36.100 --> 00:41:36.700
 we were married

00:41:36.700 --> 00:41:37.480
 we got married

00:41:37.480 --> 00:41:38.100
 in a church

00:41:38.100 --> 00:41:38.900
 with a pastor

00:41:38.900 --> 00:41:39.880
 we did pre-marriage

00:41:39.880 --> 00:41:40.360
 counseling

00:41:40.360 --> 00:41:41.519
 we even prayed

00:41:41.519 --> 00:41:42.039
 about it

00:41:42.039 --> 00:41:43.260
 we followed

00:41:43.260 --> 00:41:44.800
 God's recipe

00:41:44.800 --> 00:41:45.840
 down to the T

00:41:45.840 --> 00:41:46.840
 I don't understand

00:41:46.840 --> 00:41:47.560
 why it didn't

00:41:47.560 --> 00:41:48.220
 work out

00:41:48.220 --> 00:41:49.519
 and as I've

00:41:49.519 --> 00:41:49.920
 thought about

00:41:49.920 --> 00:41:50.500
 that over the

00:41:50.500 --> 00:41:50.780
 years

00:41:50.780 --> 00:41:51.260
 one of the

00:41:51.260 --> 00:41:51.680
 conclusions

00:41:51.680 --> 00:41:52.060
 that I've

00:41:52.060 --> 00:41:52.500
 come to

00:41:52.500 --> 00:41:53.060
 is this

00:41:53.060 --> 00:41:54.780
 that the

00:41:54.780 --> 00:41:55.280
 kinds of

00:41:55.280 --> 00:41:55.600
 marriages

00:41:55.600 --> 00:41:56.019
 that God

00:41:56.019 --> 00:41:56.420
 wants us

00:41:56.420 --> 00:41:56.780
 to have

00:41:56.780 --> 00:41:57.200
 are not

00:41:57.200 --> 00:41:58.240
 formulaic

00:41:58.240 --> 00:41:59.420
 or transactional

00:41:59.420 --> 00:42:00.400
 they are

00:42:00.400 --> 00:42:01.000
 dynamic

00:42:01.000 --> 00:42:02.039
 and relational

00:42:02.039 --> 00:42:03.380
 and what I

00:42:03.380 --> 00:42:03.960
 mean by that

00:42:03.960 --> 00:42:04.480
 is that the

00:42:04.480 --> 00:42:05.240
 thing that's

00:42:05.240 --> 00:42:05.460
 going to

00:42:05.460 --> 00:42:05.860
 give you

00:42:05.860 --> 00:42:06.139
 a great

00:42:06.139 --> 00:42:06.460
 marriage

00:42:06.460 --> 00:42:06.820
 is not

00:42:06.820 --> 00:42:07.360
 just following

00:42:07.360 --> 00:42:07.880
 the do's

00:42:07.880 --> 00:42:08.380
 and don'ts

00:42:08.380 --> 00:42:08.880
 according to

00:42:08.880 --> 00:42:09.360
 the scripture

00:42:09.360 --> 00:42:10.200
 even though

00:42:10.200 --> 00:42:10.840
 that's important

00:42:10.840 --> 00:42:12.059
 it's actually

00:42:12.059 --> 00:42:13.220
 inviting God

00:42:13.220 --> 00:42:13.740
 into your

00:42:13.740 --> 00:42:14.260
 life and

00:42:14.260 --> 00:42:14.599
 into your

00:42:14.599 --> 00:42:14.960
 marriage

00:42:14.960 --> 00:42:15.539
 day by

00:42:15.539 --> 00:42:15.880
 day

00:42:15.880 --> 00:42:16.539
 hour by

00:42:16.539 --> 00:42:16.900
 hour

00:42:16.900 --> 00:42:17.680
 week by

00:42:17.680 --> 00:42:18.079
 week

00:42:18.079 --> 00:42:19.240
 in other

00:42:19.240 --> 00:42:19.579
 words

00:42:19.579 --> 00:42:20.800
 you can't

00:42:20.800 --> 00:42:21.059
 just say

00:42:21.059 --> 00:42:21.440
 I follow

00:42:21.440 --> 00:42:21.900
 the rules

00:42:21.900 --> 00:42:22.380
 therefore

00:42:22.380 --> 00:42:23.159
 pop my

00:42:23.159 --> 00:42:23.440
 marriage

00:42:23.440 --> 00:42:23.680
 in the

00:42:23.680 --> 00:42:23.940
 oven

00:42:23.940 --> 00:42:24.860
 and out

00:42:24.860 --> 00:42:25.300
 comes this

00:42:25.300 --> 00:42:25.579
 beautiful

00:42:25.579 --> 00:42:26.019
 marriage

00:42:26.019 --> 00:42:26.300
 right

00:42:26.300 --> 00:42:27.240
 it's not

00:42:27.240 --> 00:42:27.440
 like

00:42:27.440 --> 00:42:27.860
 baking

00:42:27.860 --> 00:42:28.860
 not that

00:42:28.860 --> 00:42:29.080
 I'm a

00:42:29.080 --> 00:42:29.280
 baker

00:42:29.280 --> 00:42:30.480
 but I'm

00:42:30.480 --> 00:42:30.880
 told that

00:42:30.880 --> 00:42:31.120
 if you

00:42:31.120 --> 00:42:31.320
 bake

00:42:31.320 --> 00:42:31.780
 follow the

00:42:31.780 --> 00:42:32.200
 instructions

00:42:32.200 --> 00:42:32.600
 right

00:42:32.600 --> 00:42:33.640
 it's not

00:42:33.640 --> 00:42:34.039
 just pop

00:42:34.039 --> 00:42:34.220
 in the

00:42:34.220 --> 00:42:34.320
 oven

00:42:34.320 --> 00:42:34.580
 out

00:42:34.580 --> 00:42:34.900
 comes a

00:42:34.900 --> 00:42:35.080
 beautiful

00:42:35.080 --> 00:42:35.340
 marriage

00:42:35.340 --> 00:42:35.620
 it's

00:42:35.620 --> 00:42:36.280
 day by

00:42:36.280 --> 00:42:36.539
 day

00:42:36.539 --> 00:42:36.780
 saying

00:42:36.780 --> 00:42:37.200
 Christ

00:42:37.200 --> 00:42:37.580
 come and

00:42:37.580 --> 00:42:37.700
 have

00:42:37.700 --> 00:42:37.980
 your way

00:42:37.980 --> 00:42:38.320
 in my life

00:42:38.320 --> 00:42:38.700
 Christ

00:42:38.700 --> 00:42:39.060
 come and

00:42:39.060 --> 00:42:39.460
 shape me

00:42:39.460 --> 00:42:39.780
 by the

00:42:39.780 --> 00:42:40.140
 gospel

00:42:40.140 --> 00:42:41.260
 Jonathan

00:42:41.260 --> 00:42:41.600
 Grant

00:42:41.600 --> 00:42:42.019
 and James

00:42:42.019 --> 00:42:42.300
 Smith

00:42:42.300 --> 00:42:42.820
 I quoted

00:42:42.820 --> 00:42:43.380
 them earlier

00:42:43.380 --> 00:42:44.140
 they said

00:42:44.140 --> 00:42:44.380
 this

00:42:44.380 --> 00:42:45.400
 that many

00:42:45.400 --> 00:42:45.840
 people in

00:42:45.840 --> 00:42:46.500
 their 20s

00:42:46.500 --> 00:42:46.700
 think

00:42:46.700 --> 00:42:47.039
 listen

00:42:47.039 --> 00:42:47.680
 my 20s

00:42:47.680 --> 00:42:47.940
 is my

00:42:47.940 --> 00:42:48.380
 age of

00:42:48.380 --> 00:42:49.340
 exploration

00:42:49.340 --> 00:42:49.840
 self

00:42:49.840 --> 00:42:50.420
 discovery

00:42:50.420 --> 00:42:50.860
 self

00:42:50.860 --> 00:42:51.620
 actualization

00:42:51.620 --> 00:42:52.600
 see the

00:42:52.600 --> 00:42:52.840
 world

00:42:52.840 --> 00:42:53.340
 do what I

00:42:53.340 --> 00:42:53.600
 want to

00:42:53.599 --> 00:42:53.799
 do

00:42:53.799 --> 00:42:54.519
 and when

00:42:54.519 --> 00:42:54.839
 I hit

00:42:54.839 --> 00:42:55.239
 30

00:42:55.239 --> 00:42:55.960
 then I'm

00:42:55.960 --> 00:42:56.159
 going to

00:42:56.159 --> 00:42:56.679
 settle down

00:42:56.679 --> 00:42:57.179
 get married

00:42:57.179 --> 00:42:57.480
 and have

00:42:57.480 --> 00:42:57.819
 kids

00:42:57.819 --> 00:42:58.099
 right

00:42:58.099 --> 00:42:59.139
 and they

00:42:59.139 --> 00:42:59.619
 say that

00:42:59.619 --> 00:43:00.179
 that's like

00:43:00.179 --> 00:43:00.779
 an Olympic

00:43:00.779 --> 00:43:01.500
 hopeful

00:43:01.500 --> 00:43:02.920
 leaving training

00:43:02.920 --> 00:43:03.639
 to the night

00:43:03.639 --> 00:43:04.019
 before

00:43:04.019 --> 00:43:05.319
 that's not

00:43:05.319 --> 00:43:05.779
 going to work

00:43:05.779 --> 00:43:06.440
 out very well

00:43:06.440 --> 00:43:06.739
 for you

00:43:06.739 --> 00:43:07.000
 right

00:43:07.000 --> 00:43:08.099
 and so the

00:43:08.099 --> 00:43:08.639
 key is

00:43:08.639 --> 00:43:09.019
 actually

00:43:09.019 --> 00:43:09.519
 what makes

00:43:09.519 --> 00:43:09.960
 an Olympic

00:43:09.960 --> 00:43:10.360
 athlete

00:43:10.360 --> 00:43:10.779
 brilliant

00:43:10.779 --> 00:43:11.239
 is that

00:43:11.239 --> 00:43:11.739
 10 or

00:43:11.739 --> 00:43:12.440
 15 years

00:43:12.440 --> 00:43:12.900
 before

00:43:12.900 --> 00:43:13.659
 they were

00:43:13.659 --> 00:43:14.079
 becoming

00:43:14.079 --> 00:43:14.480
 the kind

00:43:14.480 --> 00:43:15.059
 of person

00:43:15.059 --> 00:43:15.699
 that could

00:43:15.699 --> 00:43:16.059
 perform

00:43:16.059 --> 00:43:16.440
 on that

00:43:16.440 --> 00:43:16.860
 stage

00:43:16.860 --> 00:43:18.440
 in other

00:43:18.440 --> 00:43:18.739
 words

00:43:18.739 --> 00:43:19.339
 what makes

00:43:19.339 --> 00:43:19.599
 you a

00:43:19.599 --> 00:43:20.380
 great spouse

00:43:20.380 --> 00:43:21.019
 is the same

00:43:21.019 --> 00:43:21.339
 thing that

00:43:21.339 --> 00:43:21.639
 makes you

00:43:21.639 --> 00:43:21.940
 a great

00:43:21.940 --> 00:43:22.480
 son or

00:43:22.480 --> 00:43:22.839
 daughter

00:43:22.839 --> 00:43:23.219
 or a

00:43:23.219 --> 00:43:23.360
 great

00:43:23.360 --> 00:43:24.000
 CG member

00:43:24.000 --> 00:43:24.440
 or church

00:43:24.440 --> 00:43:24.700
 member

00:43:24.700 --> 00:43:25.480
 or colleague

00:43:25.480 --> 00:43:26.500
 or employee

00:43:26.500 --> 00:43:27.519
 it's the

00:43:27.519 --> 00:43:27.840
 kind of

00:43:27.840 --> 00:43:28.120
 person

00:43:28.120 --> 00:43:28.420
 that's been

00:43:28.420 --> 00:43:29.660
 so changed

00:43:29.660 --> 00:43:30.180
 by God's

00:43:30.180 --> 00:43:30.519
 grace

00:43:30.519 --> 00:43:31.220
 and so ravished

00:43:31.220 --> 00:43:31.539
 by the

00:43:31.539 --> 00:43:31.860
 gospel

00:43:31.860 --> 00:43:32.280
 that has

00:43:32.280 --> 00:43:33.039
 been

00:43:33.039 --> 00:43:34.640
 so blown

00:43:34.640 --> 00:43:35.039
 away by

00:43:35.039 --> 00:43:35.740
 who Christ

00:43:35.740 --> 00:43:36.019
 is

00:43:36.019 --> 00:43:36.539
 that actually

00:43:36.539 --> 00:43:37.019
 able to

00:43:37.019 --> 00:43:37.620
 pour your

00:43:37.620 --> 00:43:38.280
 life out

00:43:38.280 --> 00:43:38.940
 for the

00:43:38.940 --> 00:43:39.559
 other person

00:43:39.559 --> 00:43:40.340
 it's the

00:43:40.340 --> 00:43:40.620
 kind of

00:43:40.620 --> 00:43:40.880
 person

00:43:40.880 --> 00:43:41.220
 that's so

00:43:41.220 --> 00:43:41.760
 secure

00:43:41.760 --> 00:43:42.059
 in who

00:43:42.059 --> 00:43:42.400
 Christ

00:43:42.400 --> 00:43:42.519
 is

00:43:42.519 --> 00:43:42.820
 that you're

00:43:42.820 --> 00:43:43.340
 not looking

00:43:43.340 --> 00:43:43.800
 to others

00:43:43.800 --> 00:43:44.380
 to complete

00:43:44.380 --> 00:43:44.720
 you

00:43:44.720 --> 00:43:45.640
 but because

00:43:45.640 --> 00:43:45.860
 you're

00:43:45.860 --> 00:43:46.220
 completing

00:43:46.220 --> 00:43:46.660
 Christ

00:43:46.660 --> 00:43:46.960
 you can

00:43:46.960 --> 00:43:47.160
 pour

00:43:47.160 --> 00:43:47.500
 yourself

00:43:47.500 --> 00:43:47.760
 out

00:43:47.760 --> 00:43:48.340
 for others

00:43:48.340 --> 00:43:49.260
 and so

00:43:49.260 --> 00:43:49.660
 what that

00:43:49.660 --> 00:43:50.019
 means is

00:43:50.019 --> 00:43:50.360
 that if

00:43:50.360 --> 00:43:50.980
 you married

00:43:50.980 --> 00:43:52.079
 the way to

00:43:52.079 --> 00:43:52.519
 have a great

00:43:52.519 --> 00:43:53.039
 marriage

00:43:53.039 --> 00:43:53.659
 the kind

00:43:53.659 --> 00:43:54.059
 of marriage

00:43:54.059 --> 00:43:54.380
 that God

00:43:54.380 --> 00:43:54.880
 has designed

00:43:54.880 --> 00:43:55.300
 for us

00:43:55.300 --> 00:43:55.960
 is not just

00:43:55.960 --> 00:43:56.659
 reading a certain

00:43:56.659 --> 00:43:57.380
 book or going

00:43:57.380 --> 00:43:57.980
 on a course

00:43:57.980 --> 00:43:59.099
 and then saying

00:43:59.099 --> 00:43:59.840
 great

00:43:59.840 --> 00:44:00.440
 all done

00:44:00.440 --> 00:44:01.440
 it's actually

00:44:01.440 --> 00:44:02.460
 day by day

00:44:02.460 --> 00:44:03.239
 living a life

00:44:03.239 --> 00:44:03.900
 of confession

00:44:03.900 --> 00:44:04.659
 and repentance

00:44:04.659 --> 00:44:06.239
 examining our

00:44:06.239 --> 00:44:06.519
 heart

00:44:06.519 --> 00:44:07.139
 saying Jesus

00:44:07.139 --> 00:44:07.719
 come and have

00:44:07.719 --> 00:44:08.119
 your way in

00:44:08.119 --> 00:44:08.480
 my life

00:44:08.480 --> 00:44:09.739
 come and change

00:44:09.739 --> 00:44:10.340
 me and transform

00:44:10.340 --> 00:44:10.960
 me to live

00:44:10.960 --> 00:44:11.320
 for you

00:44:11.320 --> 00:44:12.380
 and if you're

00:44:12.380 --> 00:44:12.920
 not married

00:44:12.920 --> 00:44:13.519
 if you're single

00:44:13.519 --> 00:44:14.019
 and you hope

00:44:14.019 --> 00:44:14.539
 to get married

00:44:14.539 --> 00:44:14.980
 one day

00:44:14.980 --> 00:44:16.079
 the way to a

00:44:16.079 --> 00:44:16.619
 great marriage

00:44:16.619 --> 00:44:17.320
 is not just

00:44:17.320 --> 00:44:17.860
 pre-marriage

00:44:17.860 --> 00:44:18.219
 course

00:44:18.219 --> 00:44:19.000
 reading a book

00:44:19.000 --> 00:44:20.079
 or getting

00:44:20.079 --> 00:44:20.960
 married in a church

00:44:20.960 --> 00:44:21.619
 with a pastor

00:44:21.619 --> 00:44:22.739
 it's actually

00:44:22.739 --> 00:44:23.599
 by entering

00:44:23.599 --> 00:44:24.400
 into the love

00:44:24.400 --> 00:44:25.099
 story of the

00:44:25.099 --> 00:44:25.400
 Bible

00:44:25.400 --> 00:44:26.059
 it's entering

00:44:26.059 --> 00:44:26.819
 into the gospel

00:44:26.819 --> 00:44:27.799
 story of scripture

00:44:27.799 --> 00:44:29.219
 it's letting Jesus

00:44:29.219 --> 00:44:30.139
 so capture your

00:44:30.139 --> 00:44:30.880
 heart and life

00:44:30.880 --> 00:44:32.460
 responding to his

00:44:32.460 --> 00:44:33.460
 initiating love

00:44:33.460 --> 00:44:34.179
 towards you

00:44:34.179 --> 00:44:35.559
 and surrendering

00:44:35.559 --> 00:44:36.039
 to him

00:44:36.039 --> 00:44:37.059
 that you become

00:44:37.059 --> 00:44:37.859
 the kind of person

00:44:37.859 --> 00:44:38.539
 who one day

00:44:38.539 --> 00:44:39.319
 can stand at the

00:44:39.319 --> 00:44:39.599
 altar

00:44:39.599 --> 00:44:41.139
 and can legitimately

00:44:41.139 --> 00:44:42.440
 say all that I am

00:44:42.440 --> 00:44:43.880
 and all that I have

00:44:43.880 --> 00:44:44.900
 like Jesus

00:44:44.900 --> 00:44:45.539
 towards me

00:44:45.539 --> 00:44:46.579
 I give myself

00:44:46.579 --> 00:44:47.759
 to you

00:44:47.759 --> 00:44:49.139
 friends

00:44:49.139 --> 00:44:49.500
 there's so much

00:44:49.500 --> 00:44:49.960
 more we could

00:44:49.960 --> 00:44:50.259
 say

00:44:50.259 --> 00:44:50.940
 but this is

00:44:50.940 --> 00:44:51.839
 God's plan

00:44:51.839 --> 00:44:52.440
 for marriage

00:44:52.440 --> 00:44:53.900
 that one flesh

00:44:53.900 --> 00:44:54.519
 one man

00:44:54.519 --> 00:44:54.980
 one woman

00:44:54.980 --> 00:44:55.900
 come together

00:44:55.900 --> 00:44:56.500
 and give

00:44:56.500 --> 00:44:57.319
 themselves to

00:44:57.319 --> 00:44:57.779
 one another

00:44:57.779 --> 00:44:58.339
 in one flesh

00:44:58.339 --> 00:44:58.619
 union

00:44:58.619 --> 00:44:59.960
 this is God's

00:44:59.960 --> 00:45:01.119
 purpose for marriage

00:45:01.119 --> 00:45:01.859
 that our marriage

00:45:01.859 --> 00:45:02.639
 will be an agent

00:45:02.639 --> 00:45:03.599
 of light and salt

00:45:03.599 --> 00:45:04.639
 of kingdom blessing

00:45:04.639 --> 00:45:05.699
 of heaven on earth

00:45:05.699 --> 00:45:06.879
 this is God's

00:45:06.879 --> 00:45:07.879
 pattern for marriage

00:45:07.879 --> 00:45:09.179
 after the glory

00:45:09.179 --> 00:45:09.920
 of Christ's love

00:45:09.920 --> 00:45:10.440
 for us

00:45:10.440 --> 00:45:11.579
 we will live

00:45:11.579 --> 00:45:12.519
 and love one

00:45:12.519 --> 00:45:13.079
 another too

00:45:13.079 --> 00:45:14.259
 let's pray together

00:45:14.260 --> 00:45:17.500
 Lord Jesus

00:45:17.500 --> 00:45:18.280
 as we look

00:45:18.280 --> 00:45:19.200
 at these topics

00:45:19.200 --> 00:45:19.640
 we

00:45:19.640 --> 00:45:22.980
 we are both

00:45:22.980 --> 00:45:23.660
 as we look

00:45:23.660 --> 00:45:24.260
 at your word

00:45:24.260 --> 00:45:24.500
 God

00:45:24.500 --> 00:45:25.100
 we are both

00:45:25.100 --> 00:45:27.160
 drawn with hope

00:45:27.160 --> 00:45:28.140
 because we know

00:45:28.140 --> 00:45:28.640
 the gospel

00:45:28.640 --> 00:45:29.600
 is always good news

00:45:29.600 --> 00:45:31.040
 and even

00:45:31.040 --> 00:45:32.000
 in the very worst

00:45:32.000 --> 00:45:32.180
 news

00:45:32.180 --> 00:45:32.580
 when we were

00:45:32.580 --> 00:45:33.620
 dead in our sins

00:45:33.620 --> 00:45:34.120
 your gospel

00:45:34.120 --> 00:45:35.180
 gave us new life

00:45:35.180 --> 00:45:35.500
 God

00:45:35.500 --> 00:45:36.440
 where our relationships

00:45:36.440 --> 00:45:37.320
 might feel dead

00:45:37.320 --> 00:45:38.220
 you God

00:45:38.220 --> 00:45:39.180
 can breathe new life

00:45:39.180 --> 00:45:40.360
 and so we are

00:45:40.360 --> 00:45:41.100
 encouraged God

00:45:41.100 --> 00:45:41.680
 but we also

00:45:41.680 --> 00:45:42.600
 we come with

00:45:42.600 --> 00:45:43.500
 sober reality

00:45:43.500 --> 00:45:45.079
 God

00:45:45.079 --> 00:45:45.519
 marriage

00:45:45.519 --> 00:45:46.320
 and relationships

00:45:46.320 --> 00:45:47.179
 and even

00:45:47.179 --> 00:45:48.219
 dating relationships

00:45:48.219 --> 00:45:49.119
 and other relationships

00:45:49.119 --> 00:45:50.179
 are also a source

00:45:50.179 --> 00:45:51.179
 of much pain

00:45:51.179 --> 00:45:52.460
 much shame

00:45:52.460 --> 00:45:53.079
 much guilt

00:45:53.079 --> 00:45:56.719
 Jesus

00:45:56.719 --> 00:45:57.460
 we come before you

00:45:57.460 --> 00:45:57.860
 this morning

00:45:57.860 --> 00:45:58.539
 because we need

00:45:58.539 --> 00:45:59.039
 your grace

00:45:59.039 --> 00:46:01.139
 we don't just need

00:46:01.139 --> 00:46:01.639
 a formula

00:46:01.639 --> 00:46:02.480
 we don't just need

00:46:02.480 --> 00:46:03.059
 instructions

00:46:03.059 --> 00:46:03.940
 we don't just need

00:46:03.940 --> 00:46:04.460
 a sermon

00:46:04.460 --> 00:46:05.659
 we need your

00:46:05.659 --> 00:46:06.320
 Holy Spirit

00:46:06.320 --> 00:46:07.840
 and God

00:46:07.840 --> 00:46:08.539
 as Angie

00:46:08.539 --> 00:46:09.300
 reminded us

00:46:09.300 --> 00:46:10.099
 last week

00:46:10.099 --> 00:46:10.639
 Sunday

00:46:10.639 --> 00:46:12.179
 the same spirit

00:46:12.179 --> 00:46:12.880
 that raised

00:46:12.880 --> 00:46:13.360
 Jesus

00:46:13.360 --> 00:46:14.000
 from the dead

00:46:14.000 --> 00:46:14.599
 is at work

00:46:14.599 --> 00:46:15.140
 in our hearts

00:46:15.140 --> 00:46:15.680
 and lives

00:46:15.680 --> 00:46:16.680
 and is able

00:46:16.680 --> 00:46:17.280
 to raise

00:46:17.280 --> 00:46:18.019
 our marriages

00:46:18.019 --> 00:46:18.820
 our relationships

00:46:18.820 --> 00:46:19.700
 back from the dead

00:46:19.700 --> 00:46:21.579
 Jesus

00:46:21.579 --> 00:46:22.120
 we ask you

00:46:22.120 --> 00:46:22.579
 to come

00:46:22.579 --> 00:46:23.380
 and fill us

00:46:23.380 --> 00:46:23.760
 with hope

00:46:23.760 --> 00:46:24.120
 again

00:46:24.120 --> 00:46:25.860
 won't you come

00:46:25.860 --> 00:46:26.079
 God

00:46:26.079 --> 00:46:26.760
 and shape us

00:46:26.760 --> 00:46:27.200
 and make us

00:46:27.200 --> 00:46:27.680
 the kind

00:46:27.680 --> 00:46:28.220
 of people

00:46:28.220 --> 00:46:29.260
 that

00:46:29.260 --> 00:46:30.599
 will have

00:46:30.599 --> 00:46:31.200
 a great marriage

00:46:31.200 --> 00:46:31.820
 won't you come

00:46:31.820 --> 00:46:32.700
 for those of us

00:46:32.700 --> 00:46:33.200
 that are single

00:46:33.200 --> 00:46:33.480
 God

00:46:33.480 --> 00:46:34.039
 won't you start

00:46:34.039 --> 00:46:34.700
 to shape us

00:46:34.700 --> 00:46:35.460
 by the gospel

00:46:35.460 --> 00:46:36.059
 for those of us

00:46:36.059 --> 00:46:36.599
 that are married

00:46:36.599 --> 00:46:37.420
 shape our hearts

00:46:37.420 --> 00:46:37.740
 God

00:46:37.740 --> 00:46:38.700
 and Lord

00:46:38.700 --> 00:46:39.220
 we pray

00:46:39.220 --> 00:46:39.519
 that

00:46:39.519 --> 00:46:40.220
 in

00:46:40.220 --> 00:46:41.280
 Watermark

00:46:41.280 --> 00:46:42.000
 and Hong Kong

00:46:42.000 --> 00:46:42.200
 God

00:46:42.200 --> 00:46:43.200
 that your people

00:46:43.200 --> 00:46:44.500
 your families

00:46:44.500 --> 00:46:45.340
 in Hong Kong

00:46:45.340 --> 00:46:46.140
 will be agents

00:46:46.140 --> 00:46:46.680
 for good

00:46:46.680 --> 00:46:48.580
 agents for shalom

00:46:48.580 --> 00:46:49.600
 agents for peace

00:46:49.600 --> 00:46:50.600
 that heaven

00:46:50.600 --> 00:46:51.360
 will come to us

00:46:51.360 --> 00:46:52.200
 because you God

00:46:52.200 --> 00:46:52.760
 have invaded

00:46:52.760 --> 00:46:53.780
 our own hearts

00:46:53.780 --> 00:46:55.640
 with your heavenly grace

00:46:55.640 --> 00:46:57.720
 we pray this Christ

00:46:57.720 --> 00:46:58.860
 in your wonderful

00:46:58.860 --> 00:47:00.280
 and your gracious name

00:47:00.280 --> 00:47:01.860
 Amen

00:47:01.860 --> 00:47:02.000
 Amen