I'd like an amen on this next statement.
Being a Christian parent is challenging.
Amen.
It is challenging.
I mean, we're living in a world right now,
in a culture right now,
where we're one step closer to moral bankruptcy.
We seem like we are being handed over, Romans 1,
by God to the desires of the flesh of our culture.
And so it's challenging for us individually
to navigate this season we're in in our culture.
It's even more challenging to navigate our children
to help them walk on the path of wisdom.
In fact, many of us as parents,
we will encounter hardship with our children.
We're going to have head-scratching moments of confusion.
We're going to experience heartache
when our children choose foolish ways.
It's going to be difficult.
And when we encounter those kinds of things,
this is what our temptations are.
We can be kind of like want to give up and check out.
That's one option.
Another option is to kind of withdraw
and to isolate within kind of a Christian holy huddle.
And then there's always the, you know,
I don't care at all whatsoever or anything.
And you just kind of blend into everybody else.
Well, I'm so grateful that God's Word
speaks directly to parents, Christian parents.
And God has us a way to walk, brothers and sisters,
in order to raise our children in the fear of the Lord.
And so here is the call that I want to put out early
on all of you as parents and grandparents,
brothers and sisters, moms and dads,
grandmas and grandpas.
The call this morning is to be faithful to the Lord
in your parenting.
To be faithful to God in your parenting.
Eugene Peterson wrote a book entitled
A Long Obedience in the Same Direction.
Parenting is a long faithfulness in the same direction.
Aiming our children at God over and over and over again.
So this morning, as part of our study in the book of Proverbs,
I'm going to do a bit of a survey of the book of Proverbs.
And I'm going to point you to six wise ways,
six wise ways we parent our children to the Lord,
how to be faithful to the Lord.
And the first way is that wise parents fear God first.
Wise parents fear God first.
Christian parenting doesn't start with your children.
Christian parenting does not start with a parenting book
and learning some skills.
Christian parenting starts first with God.
Fear God first.
In Proverbs 9.10, we learn that the fear of the Lord
is the beginning of wisdom.
Wisdom is a life skill of crafting a life
that is pleasing to God.
And you craft a life according to the fear of the Lord.
And that word fear is better understood
as kind of a reverence,
a controlling reverence of your entire life.
It's this controlling reality that governs all that you do.
And all throughout this series,
I've been trying to put a little bit of an illustration in your minds
as to the central operating system of your computer, your life.
Proverbs depicts two ways to live, wisdom and folly.
And there's two different operating systems at work in each of us.
There's the operating system of the flesh,
which moves towards folly.
And then there's the operating system of faith,
which moves towards wisdom.
And the operating system of the flesh,
what is the governing reality of that system is me,
is you, is what we want.
The world revolves around me.
It's me centered.
But the operating system of the faith,
of wisdom, is God centered.
It's God is the controlling reality of all of our lives.
And this is where I get to preach the cross right now to you.
Because it's the cross of Jesus Christ
that delivers us daily
from the operating system of the flesh
and delivers us to the operating system of faith.
From living a life for me
to living a life for God and His glory.
Every day,
the cross of Jesus Christ
delivers me from the flesh to faith.
faith.
An operating system in a computer
controls all of a computer's applications.
And the operating system of faith,
fearing God above all else,
it governs the application of parenting in our lives.
We will either be governed by our flesh in our parenting,
or we will be governed by faith.
If you turn in your Bibles to Proverbs 14,
chapter 14, verse 26,
we read this.
In the fear of the Lord,
one has strong confidence,
and his children will have a refuge.
You see the logic?
When I fear God above all else,
God uses that to refuge my children.
There's two applications of this.
Moms and dads,
grandmas and grandpas.
The greatest way to love your children,
to raise your children where it all starts,
the greatest thing that you can do for your children
is to love God with all that you've got.
To fear Him above all else.
To see who He is
and allow that to govern all that you are.
Every day,
every morning,
you need to go into the settings of your heart
and disable, by faith,
the old operating system of flesh.
You say no to that,
and you flip on through the cross and say,
I am going to live for the glory of God today.
I am going to fear Him above all else
because He is worthy.
Daily, you turn from living for yourself
to trusting in Christ,
and that's the best thing that you can do for your children.
In the fear of the Lord,
one has strong confidence,
and his children will have a refuge.
But it also,
another application of this
is when you fear the Lord,
and that's the governing reality of your life.
It's the operating system,
the program that's governing all other applications.
You start to understand
what the goal is in your parenting.
For every parent,
the goal is to raise their children
to be a responsible adult.
That's the baseline.
But it doesn't go far enough
for Christian parents.
For Christian parents,
the goal is to raise your children
to be responsible adults
who fear the Lord.
And that becomes the governing reality
of our lives,
of their lives.
And I think you're probably starting to feel right now
this sense of,
this is beyond me.
And well, you should.
The goal is to raise our children
to become responsible adults
who fear the Lord.
The strategy, then,
is not behavioral modification.
The strategy to that goal
is to address our children's hearts
over and over and over again.
Because your child's heart
is the control center of their life.
And when you address that as a parent
over and over and over again,
you train them.
You train them in fearing the Lord.
So we have the goal.
The goal is to train your children
to fear the Lord.
The strategy is to attend to their heart.
And now there are tactics to that.
The way that you train a young child
in addressing their heart
so that they fear the Lord
is going to be different tactically
than addressing a teenager
and addressing their heart
to fear the Lord.
The same goal, same strategy,
different tactics.
Wise parents,
fear God first.
Moms and dads,
grandmas and grandpas.
The call on your life
is to be faithful to the Lord
in your parenting.
Wise way number two.
Wise parents,
obey God's call.
Obey God's call.
If you flip in your Bible
to Proverbs 22, verse 6,
this is a classic Bible verse
many of you are familiar with
if you've been around the church.
But oftentimes,
it's somewhat misunderstood.
Train up a child
in the way he should go.
Even when he's old,
he will not depart from it.
And we can use that proverb
as a promise.
But that's not how proverbs work.
A proverb isn't a promise per se
as much as it is a truism.
Generally speaking,
typically,
when you raise up a child
in the fear of the Lord,
when he's old,
he will not depart from it.
What I want to emphasize
in this verse
is not the second half of it,
but the first half.
Because in the first half
is a command.
It's an imperative.
Train up a child
in the way he should go,
in the way of wisdom,
in fearing the Lord.
It's a command,
brothers and sisters,
moms and dads,
grandmas and grandpas.
It's a command to us.
God is calling us
to train up our children
in God's ways.
It's not just a good idea.
It's not something
you acknowledge as a parent
and then move on
with the rest of your day.
It's something you obey.
Take it to heart
and you act on it.
Now, I want you to imagine
a dude ranch in Wyoming.
And as you're looking
at this dude ranch,
you come into sight
of this circular pen.
It's fenced in.
And in that pen,
in the middle of that pen,
is an old-season cowboy.
And in his left hand,
there is a rope
leading to this thoroughbred stallion.
And that stallion
is running around
the circumference
of that pen.
And that rope
is attached to the stallion,
the bit and the bridle
on that horse.
And on the right hand
of this cowboy
is a long stick.
And he is tapping
the rear end
of that stallion.
And he's prodded on.
And that stallion
is moving around,
going from right to left
in the pen,
day after day,
week after week.
That cowboy
is training
that stallion
to feel the pressure.
Feel the pressure
on the bridle and bit
and respond
to the slightest tug
in the bit and bridle.
And it turns left.
And then he turns
that stallion around
and puts the rod
in his left hand
and the lead
in his right.
And he trains
that stallion
to pull to the right
day after day.
Week after week.
Training.
Purposeful.
Diligent.
This cowboy
sees the potential
in this stallion.
And above all else,
he wants that stallion
to ride trails well.
We're not raising stallions.
We're raising image bearers.
We're raising worshipers.
And it takes
careful,
diligent,
patient,
purposeful training
over and over
and over again
to help our children
respond to the slightest
tug of God's word.
To go to the left
as God would have them
or go to the right
and to walk on the path
of wisdom.
Our goal
as moms and dads
is to train our children
to fear the Lord
so that they fear Him
when they leave our homes.
So that they know
how to walk
the path of wisdom.
Because we have
labored to that end
in their lives.
Now, I want to let you know
that a family
is not a boot camp.
The way we train
our children
is not by
having a sergeant
yelling at our kids.
The way
that we raise
our children
is what Paul Tripp
calls
a loving,
learning community.
That's what a family is.
That's God's design.
That's Deuteronomy
chapter 6,
4 through 7,
the Shema.
Hear, O Israel,
the Lord your God
the Lord is one.
You shall love Him
with everything you've got.
His word should be
on your hearts, parents.
And then you speak
that word
to your children
24-7
wherever you go
always
teaching your children
God's words.
The family
is a learning community.
And moms and dads
you've been called
to train your children
to get them ready
to get them used
to God's word.
And here's
what's so sweet.
God in His
glorious sovereignty
has placed
each one
of your children
and grandchildren
in your life.
He intends
for you
to train them.
He wants to show
His goodness
to your children
through you
that they would
follow Him
and you would
show them the way
which means
you've been sent.
God has sent
you moms and dads
to your learning
communities
to train your children
to fear Him
to love Him
to learn
to respond
to His words.
Wise parents
obey God's call.
Do you know
that you've been called?
Are you aware
of what God
requires of you
moms and dads?
That this is
His word.
So the question is
have you been
neglecting it?
Have you been
avoiding
or minimizing
this good
responsibility
entrusted to you?
Do you need
to take
a humble
U-turn
in the way
that you have
been living
and utilizing
your time
with your children?
If you're married
are you and your
spouse on the same
page?
Despite what
others may say
or model
being a
Christian parent
is one of the
greatest
responsibilities
and privileges
of your
entire life.
Your life.
Wise parents
obey God's call.
The goal
brothers and sisters
is to be faithful
to the Lord
in our
parenting.
Which brings
me to
the third
way.
Wise parents
pray God's
will.
Now I can
only imagine
coming off that
last point
some of you
are thinking
I am such
a loser
of a parent
and you become
ashamed of
yourself.
You think about
all the ways
you blew it.
You think of
yourself as a
failure.
Or maybe
you are just
kind of like
hearing this
and you are
hearing it for
the first time
and I am like
I never knew
that this is
what God
required of
me.
And now you
feel overwhelmed.
You feel like
you are out of
your league.
And so you are
starting to doubt
yourself.
I can't do
that.
Or maybe
yet there is
another group
of parents in
the room.
They are like
yeah.
Just give me
the plan.
I will rock
this thing.
And so it is
not being
ashamed of
yourself.
It is not
doubting
yourself.
It is like
trusting in
yourself.
I can do
this.
Yeah.
No big
deal.
Well you
don't need
to be ashamed
nor do you
need to doubt
yourself nor
should you
trust yourself
because Proverbs
3, 5, and 6
says what?
Trust in the
Lord with
all of your
heart.
Lean not
on your own
understanding
and in
all of your
parenting ways
acknowledge
him
and he
will make
straight your
paths.
And the
principal way
in which we
acknowledge God
is by praying
to him.
And not just
saying acknowledging
God's existence
yes Lord I know
you're there
but you're
praying God's
will.
You're taking
your cues from
Jesus himself
who taught us
to pray.
Our Father
who is in
heaven.
Hallowed be
your name.
Your kingdom
come.
Your will
be done.
On earth
in my home
as it is in
heaven.
You're praying
God's will
as you
acknowledge him
in your
parenting ways.
Wise parents
just to let
you know
wise parents
are always
desperately
praying for
their children.
That kind
of desperation
crazy praying
that's normal
for Christian
parents.
It's normal
for Christian
grandparents.
You're so
burdened for
your children
and recognize
that it's
God alone
that can
change their
hearts.
You just
cry out to
him regularly.
Wise parents
pray God's
will.
You know
parenting is like
firefighting.
When your
four-year-old
melts down
in front of
you they are
producing kind
of this kind
of heat.
Or when your
middle schooler
and your high
schooler are at
odds again and
it leads to
tears and then
doors are
slammed and
then there's
this he says
she says not
that Jenny and
I have experienced
that in our
home.
Same fight
different day.
These kind of
meltdowns and
sibling fights
they generate
this kind of
heat and
then you find
out one of
your children
is looking at
pornography on
the side.
That's heat.
And the
mistake that we
can make as
parents is run
from the fire
when it actually
is it's God
giving you an
opportunity
brothers and
sisters.
this is an
opportunity to
train before a
firefighter runs
into a burning
building they
make sure that
their mask is
affixed and
that their oxygen
tank is turned
on and they
go in for the
rescue.
Prayer is the
means by which
we access
God's life
giving grace
in times of
heated
situations.
A wise
parent is
seeking
the Lord
when they
encounter
heat
from their
children
and they
prayerfully
move towards
the fire
trusting God's
going to provide
the grace
in the moment
to rescue
their children
yet again.
when confronted
with heated
parenting
opportunities
we must
be aligning
ourselves
with the
will of
our
Father.
So let
me ask you
this.
Are you
in your
parenting
ways
acknowledging
Him?
Are you
looking to
your God
regularly
when it
comes to
parenting
your
children
or
grandparenting
your
grandchildren?
Are you
seeking
Him?
Are you
prayerfully
crying out
to Him
for help?
Is there
a specific
reoccurring
parenting
opportunity?
It's a
hot spot
that regularly
lights up
again in
your children.
Maybe it's
your four-year-old
melting down,
maybe it's
your 16-year-old
provoking your
10-year-old,
start seeing
that as an
opportunity to
parent your
children, to
train them.
Start praying
towards that.
God's will be
done in your
family on
earth as it
is in
heaven.
Wise parents
pray God's
will.
Moms and
dads, are you
praying?
You must be
faithful to God
in your
parenting.
Four.
Wise parents
minister God's
word.
Wise parents
minister God's
word constantly.
Maybe you're
like, I did
not know I
signed up to
this for this.
God has
deputized you,
mom and
dad.
He has
called you
and authorized
you to
minister his
word to each
of your
children.
If you would
flip back to
Deuteronomy
chapter 6,
4 through 7.
This is called
the Shema.
Hear,
O Israel,
the Lord our
God, the Lord
is one.
That's verse 4.
That's saying
there's no other
God but this
God, Yahweh.
Verse 5,
how we respond,
you shall love
the Lord your
God with all
your heart and
with all your
soul and with
all your
might.
The response
to the one
and only God
is to worship
him with
everything you
got, moms
and dads.
And then in
verse 6, we
see, and
these words that
I command you
today shall be
on your heart.
Before it can
get to your
kids, it needs
to come through
you.
God's word
on your
heart,
ready,
governing,
affecting.
And then
verse 7,
you shall teach
them diligently
to your
children and
shall talk
of them when
you sit in
your house and
when you walk
by the way and
when you lie
down and when
you rise.
God's word
is living
and active.
It penetrates
separating bone
from marrow.
God's word,
every word is
breathed out by
God and
profitable for
teaching,
correcting,
reproof, and
training in
righteousness.
We want to get
these words into
our children's
hearts.
And God has
called us to do
this 24-7
everywhere we
go.
Speaking God's
word in season
and out of
season, when
it's convenient
and when it's
inconvenient.
Here's what you
need to
understand.
There is this
phrase all
throughout the
book of
Proverbs.
It goes
something like
this.
My son,
listen.
Hear my
son.
My son,
do not forsake
my words.
Do not spurn
your mother's
instruction.
My son,
hear me out.
My son,
don't go that
way.
My son,
my son,
over 40
times in
the book of
Proverbs,
you have this
repeated phrase
of a dad
calling his
son to hear
his words.
And in his
father's words
are God's
words.
We're seeing
Deuteronomy 6,
4-7 played
out all
throughout the
book of
Proverbs.
It's a
call.
Time and
time again.
This dad
and this
mom,
both moms
and dads,
we see that
in 1-8 and
6-20,
both moms
and dads
are communicating
God's word to
their children.
Now, if you're a
single mom or
dad, don't
fear.
God's word
is powerful.
He can use
you.
He used
Timothy's mom
to raise
him up
with his
grandma
to become
one who
fears the
Lord.
What we
see modeled
in the book
of Proverbs
is a
parent
regularly
speaking
God's
words to
his sons
and children
again and
again.
1-8,
2-1,
3-1,
4-1 through
4,
4-20,
5-1,
and on
over 40
times.
And in
those 40
or so
times,
this
father
addresses
the fear
of the
Lord,
the contrast
between
wisdom and
folly,
who your
companions
are,
he who is
wise who
walks with
the wise,
but a
companion of
fools will
suffer harm,
whether that
is in the
physical world
or whether
that's in
the virtual
world with
social media.
Has anybody
seen the
social dilemma
yet on
Netflix?
It doesn't
address the
biggest problem
of sin in
the human
heart,
but it
does help
us understand
the extent
and the
manipulation
of social
media.
We're going
to watch it
with our
own children
so that they
understand what's
at stake.
So your
companions
matter.
Self-control,
sexual purity,
speech,
not envying
sinners,
hard work,
ethic,
stewardship of
your resources.
What we see
modeled in
Proverbs is
that moms
and dads
minister God's
word.
In our
house, we
have a third
story room.
I call it the
pastoral
workshop.
I write a lot
of sermons up
there.
And so I'm
usually up there
Thursday,
Friday,
Saturday,
writing a
sermon.
And I have
this great
view of our
neighborhood.
Three nice
big windows.
I'm looking at
our neighborhood
and I always
see the mail
carrier making
his or her
way to every
house.
He's got this
addressed parcel
of words that
he is going to
bring to a
specific house
and he's going
to drop that
into the mail
slot of the
house.
And at that
point, it's
up to the
resident to do
with the mail
with what the
mail needs to
be done.
Respond
accordingly.
Parents, we
deliver the mail.
We deliver the
mail of God's
word.
Every day.
Multiple times
a day.
We're bringing
God's word
addressed uniquely
to each of our
children because we
know them.
children and
we're going to
bring it to each
of our children
and drop it
into the mail
slot of their
heart and then
we're going to
trust that to
them and the
Lord.
They need to
respond to that.
We pray that
they will.
We pray that God
would open their
hearts but we're
constantly delivering
the mail of God's
very words.
So let me ask you
a couple questions.
When you hear that
wise parents minister
God's word, do you
feel the weight and
privilege of that?
You should.
You realize that God
has called you to
this.
This is one of the
greatest responsibilities
and privileges of
your life as a
Christian.
This is what it
means to make
disciples of Jesus
of our children.
children.
Second question, are
you actively taking
God's word into
your own heart?
Are you coming
before God in his
word?
It's the Deuteronomy
6 part of the
Shema.
Is God's word
functioning in your
heart, governing
your life, changing
you from the inside
out?
There is an
integrity principle
here, brothers and
sisters.
Be sure you're
taking it in before
you start dishing it
out.
Be a man or woman
of integrity.
Are you seeing
areas of your life,
your children's life,
that you need to
deliver God's word
to?
Take it.
Deliver the mail.
Trust God with it.
Trust God that he
can use his word to
bring about a heart
change in your child
forever.
There is a particular
area that I want you
to consider, moms and
dads.
There is an encroachment
in our culture on
Sunday mornings.
It's children's sports.
I'm all for sports.
But Sunday morning
when the church
gathers to receive
God's word and
sing God's praises,
that is a very
important value to
show our children,
to instruct them.
So moms and dads,
if you have not
wrestled through this
one yet, you need
to.
How to manage your
family and your
children's activities
in sports on
Sundays.
There's a way to
trust God there.
In our family, we
made it a very clear
rule that the
Salvadis were not
going to participate
in group sports
on Sunday mornings
because as for me
and my house, we're
going to worship the
Lord on Sunday
mornings.
We're going to
establish that as a
norm.
And there will be
exceptions from time
to time, but it's
the norm.
Because it's about
values.
If you're saying no to
this, what are you
saying?
There's much to
consider here.
But moms and dads,
we are to minister
God's word.
We must be faithful
to God in our
parenting.
Point five.
Wise parents redeem
God-given
opportunities.
You might be asking
now, well, how do I
do this?
How do I train up my
child in the way he or
she should go?
How do I do this?
What does that look
like?
Well, I want to give
you an aid, an A-I-D
to anticipate, to
intervene, and to
debrief as a parent.
You're chilled.
But before we can talk
about the parent aid, I
just want to help you
think about something
else that doesn't get
talked about, but we
need to talk about it.
It's about the context
the relationships with
your children.
Training our children
to fear the Lord is
best done, best done,
in a context of love
and trust.
If you look at Proverbs
23, 26, we read this.
My son, give me your
heart and let your eyes
observe my ways.
Do you know what that
means?
Give me your heart.
Trust me, son.
Give me your confidence.
It's trust.
And in order for someone
to see, observe your
ways, you need to be
close.
Proximity.
So, before we talk
about the parent aid, we
need to talk about
relationships.
To invest in your
children.
To establish rhythms in
your family's life.
Reading the Bible.
Eating meals together.
Driving your children
to school.
These are all
opportunities to build
trust and proximity
with your children.
So you can deliver the
mail.
To delight in them.
To know them.
Watching TV together.
Reading at night
together.
There's so many things
that we can be doing
to build our
relationship.
To establish this
context of love and
trust.
Because we've got
training to do,
brothers, sisters.
So let's talk about
the parent aid.
A good coach is going
to not only just know
his team.
He's going to know
the individual players
on his team.
He's going to know
how individual players
respond to different
situations.
And so a good coach is
going to anticipate how
his player is going to
respond to this
particular situation and
he's going to prepare
him for it.
And then before the game
starts, he's going to
anticipate and prepare.
And then during the game,
he's going to intervene.
Because when his
quarterback starts flipping
out, he's going to say,
time out.
Quarterback comes over.
He's going to correct him
on some things.
And even might exercise
some discipline.
Your bench buddy, all for
that player's good.
And then he puts him
back in.
He intervenes.
And then after the game,
they debrief.
Hey, what did we learn
from this play?
Hey, what did we learn
from that?
And it helps anticipate
the next time around.
parents are coaches.
We're coaching our kids,
cheering them on, to fear
the Lord, to walk in
wisdom.
And there are going to be
some things that we need
to anticipate with our
children.
We need to help them think
things through, understand
consequences.
What will happen if you
step off the path of
wisdom into folly?
Help them think that
through.
Right now, I'm helping
my youngest daughter,
Mary.
Every day we go to school,
I'm asking her.
I'm building a relationship.
I'm praying with her.
We're pulling up to
K-Tech West.
And I am asking her a
series of questions.
I'm trying to build into
her a Christian worldview.
Here's the four questions
I ask her on a regular
basis.
Mary, where do we come
from?
God.
God created us.
Mary, every human being
in the K-Techs building
is an image bearer of God.
They're going to worship
something.
Second question.
Mary, what's our biggest
problem?
Our biggest problem is our
disobedience to God.
It's sin.
Mary, there's going to be
people in the building
saying our greatest problem
is something else.
But that's not what God's
word says.
Mary, what is God's
greatest solution to that
problem?
Jesus.
on the cross.
Mary, every person in
that building needs
Jesus.
Mary, what's the greatest
hope we have?
When Jesus comes back,
Dad, he's going to make
all wrongs right.
In those four questions,
I'm training my daughter
to anticipate what she
will encounter.
Not just that day in
K-Tech, but for the rest
of our lives.
us.
How to view the world.
But it also means we're
preparing our children for
pointed issues.
In Proverbs 5, 6, and 7,
that wise dad prepares his
son when he encounters an
adulteress.
He knows it's coming.
He prepares him beforehand.
Don't go that way, son.
It's going to happen, and
when it happens, you bolt.
We need to be having
conversations now.
Right now, Jenny and I
have conversations with our
children about what marriage
is between one man, one
woman, together, for life.
We're framing things.
We're getting ahead of
conversations that will
surely come.
We're anticipating things,
both on a larger scale
and smaller scale.
And of course, there's going
to be times when we need
to intervene.
When we call a timeout,
when our four-year-old's
melting down, when our
teenagers are fighting again,
we need to call a timeout,
and sometimes we're going to
have to discipline.
The book of Proverbs doesn't
shy away from discipline.
It doesn't shy away with the
application of the rod.
I'm not going to expand on
that right now, but I do
have some Proverbs I want to
give you to look it up if
that seems new to you.
Proverbs 22.6, 22.15, 23,
13 through 14, 29.15, 29.17.
Wisdom uses discipline to
train our children to
get off the way of
folly and back on the way
of wisdom.
There's a way to exercise
discipline that is pleasing
to God and loving of our
children.
There's a really helpful book.
It's old now.
It's called Shepherding a
Child's Heart.
It's by Paul Tripp's brother,
Ted Tripp.
And in this book, there's a
very helpful piece on the use
of the rod.
I would encourage you to look
it up.
There's another very helpful
book by Paul Tripp.
It's called Parenting.
It's his latest release on
parenting.
I would recommend it to
parents and grandparents
alike.
If you're parenting a
teenager, Paul David Tripp
wrote this book, Age of
Opportunity.
It's a little dated now, but
it's very helpful.
I would recommend them all
to you.
When you discipline your
children, what you want to be
sure you're doing is you're
being clear in what the
expectations are, clear in
what the consequences will be,
and then consistent in the
application of it.
We intervene.
We call timeouts.
And when we intervene, it is
always a gospel opportunity,
moms and dads.
When our children step off the
path of blessing into folly,
they sin.
And we say that too, son,
daughter.
That's why Jesus died.
That's why we need him to,
why he shed his blood.
For that.
And we lead them in seeking
God's forgiveness.
A-I-D, debrief.
Later during the day, you
circle back to stuff.
Hey, have you thought further
about that?
Any further thoughts?
How are you going to deal
with it next time?
And so, our anticipating, our
intervening, our debriefing,
this is the way we do
parenting.
In the context of loving,
trusting relationships.
So the question is, what is the
opportunity right now?
God is giving you to aid your
children.
Can you identify it?
Are you ready to bring the
mail?
Show the love?
Train them up?
We need to redeem God's,
God-given opportunities.
We need to be faithful to the
Lord.
The last piece, and I'll be
quick.
Wise parents trust in God's
grace.
Parenting is a long faithfulness
in the same direction.
You're going to be parenting your
children through different seasons
of their life.
It's hard work.
There's head scratching
confusion.
There will be heartache.
Your children will choose to do
foolish things.
You will do foolish things.
You will make mistakes.
You will sin against your
children.
You're going to be needing God's
grace over and over and over
again.
And our great God is lavish with
his grace.
He gives it to parents.
He gives it to children.
He wants his grace permeating
our lives because God wants your
children to fear him more than you
do.
And he's got the power to do
that.
Because of the challenging nature
of parenting, we are in constant
need of God's grace.
Constant need of God's grace.
So we're always calling out for it.
And God's always given it.
Every Christian has somewhere to
turn in their parenting.
You're never without options.
Every Christian parent needs to
turn to Jesus to abide in him
through prayer and obedience to
his word.
We attach ourselves to Jesus
every day.
He's the vine.
We are the branches.
Apart from him, we can do no good
parenting thing.
But we also have each other.
We get to abide in Jesus together
as we raise our children.
We have this unique privilege as a
church to follow Jesus together
and to raise up the next
generation together.
Parenting is hard.
So we get to encourage one another
when there's hardship.
We get to share wisdom with one
another when we're scratching our
heads wondering what to do.
We get to comfort one another
when one of us learns our child
has done something very foolish.
And we get to rejoice with one
another when God does a work.
And we say hallelujah.
We've been praying for that.
We're in this together, moms and dads,
grandmas and grandpas.
So not do we just seek Jesus.
We seek each other.
Fear God first.
Obey God's call.
Pray God's will.
Minister God's word.
Redeem God's opportunities.
Trust God's grace.
That's how we do it.
That's how we make disciples of our
children and fulfill the great
commission in our homes.
Pray with me.
God in heaven,
this is a lot of information.
And I pray now, God,
for those who are feeling
like they don't measure up,
they're ashamed of themselves,
or they feel overwhelmed,
or their tendency is to trust
in themselves.
God, we ask that you would help us
to trust you with all of our hearts.
To lean not on our own understanding.
In all of our ways,
acknowledge you,
and you will make straight our paths.
God, would you pour out your Holy Spirit
in us and through us
to affect heart change in our children
that only you can do.
God, raise up for yourself
a generation to follow us
who love you with everything they got.
In Jesus' name, amen.