WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.440 Well, I'd like us to turn together for a moment back to Philharmon. 00:00:05.440 --> 00:00:12.359 We've been studying this, we started studying this book last week, we're doing a short study 00:00:12.359 --> 00:00:17.280 over four weeks, this is part two. 00:00:17.280 --> 00:00:20.440 Last week we set the scene a little bit. 00:00:20.440 --> 00:00:26.000 We saw that this letter was written by Paul from prison, probably in Rome, probably in 00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.120 the early 60s in the first century. 00:00:29.120 --> 00:00:34.439 He's writing to Philharmon who lives in Colossae or near Colossae and he's someone whom Paul 00:00:34.439 --> 00:00:40.000 has known for some time and he has a prominent role in the church there. 00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:46.600 The reason the letter is being written is all about a man called Onesimus, a slave in 00:00:46.600 --> 00:00:52.000 Philharmon's household who had run away but has now come to faith and has been a great 00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.240 help to Paul. 00:00:54.240 --> 00:01:00.840 Now Paul is sending Onesimus back to the man that he ran away from and Paul's asking 00:01:00.840 --> 00:01:08.560 Philharmon to receive him not just as a slave but now as a beloved brother in Christ. 00:01:08.560 --> 00:01:12.520 I don't have my clicker for the slides so I just have to ask you at the back to move 00:01:12.520 --> 00:01:14.560 it for me at the moment. 00:01:14.560 --> 00:01:16.960 So if we can flick over to the next slide. 00:01:16.960 --> 00:01:22.520 I want us to focus on these verses. 00:01:22.520 --> 00:01:24.000 We can read again from verse eight. 00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.239 We'll focus on verses eight to seventeen but we can just read verses eight to ten as our 00:01:28.239 --> 00:01:30.359 text if you like. 00:01:30.359 --> 00:01:35.319 Accordingly though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do all what is required 00:01:35.319 --> 00:01:38.920 yet for love's sake I prefer to appeal to you. 00:01:38.920 --> 00:01:44.200 I, Paul, an old man and now a prisoner also for Christ Jesus. 00:01:44.200 --> 00:01:51.879 I appeal to you for my child Onesimus whose father I became in my imprisonment. 00:01:51.879 --> 00:01:57.920 Last week we were saying that this letter is written really in a very delicate situation 00:01:57.920 --> 00:02:04.079 and it's a window into the complex realities of real life church. 00:02:04.079 --> 00:02:05.840 Wonderful. 00:02:05.840 --> 00:02:10.479 This is the source of all my power. 00:02:10.479 --> 00:02:14.560 So it's a delicate situation that this has been written into and what we've been saying 00:02:14.560 --> 00:02:20.199 with this series is that it's a window into real life church and all the complexities 00:02:20.199 --> 00:02:21.199 that that can be. 00:02:21.199 --> 00:02:28.679 So our title tonight is an awkward conversion and our three headings are real people, real 00:02:28.679 --> 00:02:32.639 maturity and real theology. 00:02:32.639 --> 00:02:35.519 So the first of these is real people. 00:02:35.519 --> 00:02:39.719 To help us see the awkwardness of the circumstances surrounding Philomon, I'm going to start by 00:02:39.719 --> 00:02:43.479 doing something a little bit different and something that's maybe a little bit strange. 00:02:43.479 --> 00:02:48.719 I want you to all imagine that Paul and Philomon are meeting on Zoom. 00:02:48.719 --> 00:02:53.199 Now, I know that's a bit weird, but just bear with me. 00:02:53.199 --> 00:02:59.319 So picture in your minds, Paul and Philomon have just begun a Zoom call. 00:02:59.319 --> 00:03:00.960 Paul says, hi, Philomon. 00:03:00.960 --> 00:03:01.960 Great to see you. 00:03:01.960 --> 00:03:03.759 It's been ages. 00:03:03.759 --> 00:03:05.079 Philomon starts to speak. 00:03:05.079 --> 00:03:06.280 No sound is made. 00:03:06.280 --> 00:03:08.319 So Paul says, Philomon, you're muted. 00:03:08.319 --> 00:03:12.639 You need to unmute yourself and then follows the awkward unmuting moment that we've all 00:03:12.639 --> 00:03:14.800 become accustomed to. 00:03:14.800 --> 00:03:17.599 Philomon then speaks, Paul, it's so good to see you. 00:03:17.599 --> 00:03:19.199 I've been meaning to catch up for ages. 00:03:19.199 --> 00:03:21.120 We heard that you've been arrested. 00:03:21.120 --> 00:03:22.680 Really hope you're okay. 00:03:22.680 --> 00:03:25.280 We've been praying for you. 00:03:25.280 --> 00:03:27.000 Paul replies, thanks so much, Philomon. 00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:29.159 I'm doing fine really despite everything. 00:03:29.159 --> 00:03:31.919 I've got Mark, Aristarchus and Luke and the others. 00:03:31.919 --> 00:03:33.840 They're nearby, so they're a huge help. 00:03:33.840 --> 00:03:39.159 Listen, I wanted to get in touch because you will not believe who has been converted. 00:03:39.159 --> 00:03:42.240 You will never guess who it is. 00:03:42.240 --> 00:03:44.199 Brilliant, replies Philomon. 00:03:44.199 --> 00:03:46.120 Give me a second to sit down at the desk. 00:03:46.120 --> 00:03:48.560 Oh man, this place is a mess. 00:03:48.560 --> 00:03:51.960 Did you hear that my servant Onesimus did a run-out? 00:03:51.960 --> 00:03:53.360 I can't believe it. 00:03:53.360 --> 00:03:57.200 I am so disappointed and to be honest, I am really annoyed. 00:03:57.200 --> 00:03:58.680 I was so good to him. 00:03:58.680 --> 00:04:03.120 You know, a lot of the guys around here who have got slaves, they're not very nice to 00:04:03.120 --> 00:04:04.120 them. 00:04:04.120 --> 00:04:07.759 They can be pretty hard on their guys, but as a Christian, I've always tried to teet 00:04:07.759 --> 00:04:09.920 out household slaves well. 00:04:09.920 --> 00:04:11.480 I was so good to Onesimus. 00:04:11.480 --> 00:04:13.120 I gave him a good salary. 00:04:13.120 --> 00:04:14.520 I made sure he was well fed. 00:04:14.520 --> 00:04:18.199 I even made sure that he could come along to church with us, not that he ever paid much 00:04:18.199 --> 00:04:19.199 attention. 00:04:19.199 --> 00:04:25.360 But a few weeks ago, he just took off and now it looks as though some money is missing 00:04:25.360 --> 00:04:29.280 and all my papers and accounts are a complete mess without him. 00:04:29.280 --> 00:04:31.800 I cannot believe that he did that to me. 00:04:31.800 --> 00:04:33.879 The guy is useless. 00:04:33.879 --> 00:04:36.280 I am absolutely raging. 00:04:36.280 --> 00:04:39.840 Anyway, that's me at the desk. 00:04:39.840 --> 00:04:42.960 Who's the new convert? 00:04:42.959 --> 00:04:46.399 Paul takes a deep breath and replies, Onesimus. 00:04:46.399 --> 00:04:56.399 Now, that, of course, is a fictional Zoom call, but I hope that it captures the awkwardness 00:04:56.399 --> 00:04:59.079 of Onesimus's conversion. 00:04:59.079 --> 00:05:01.159 And there's several reasons why it's awkward. 00:05:01.159 --> 00:05:05.439 It's awkward because there's a history between Philharmon and Onesimus. 00:05:05.439 --> 00:05:09.359 They had a relationship in the past, but that's now been damaged. 00:05:09.360 --> 00:05:13.040 It's awkward because there's distance between them in the here and now. 00:05:13.040 --> 00:05:15.480 They're separated and alienated. 00:05:15.480 --> 00:05:20.439 And it's awkward because there needs to be a future together. 00:05:20.439 --> 00:05:26.800 The alienation needs to be addressed, but achieving that reconciliation is probably not 00:05:26.800 --> 00:05:29.160 going to be easy. 00:05:29.160 --> 00:05:35.480 And the point we'll keep coming back to in this series is that all of this is so relevant 00:05:35.480 --> 00:05:38.680 to real life in the church today. 00:05:38.680 --> 00:05:46.000 When you have real people, real congregations, real life pressures, these situations, these 00:05:46.000 --> 00:05:50.000 awkward situations are inevitably going to arise. 00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:55.160 Real life church will sometimes be awkward. 00:05:55.160 --> 00:06:01.840 But all too often when we face those kind of situations, we can conclude that the best 00:06:01.840 --> 00:06:06.519 thing to do is just accept the awkwardness and carry on. 00:06:06.519 --> 00:06:10.719 So Paul could easily have thought, well, Onesimus is miles away from Philharmon now. 00:06:10.719 --> 00:06:12.519 Their paths are probably never going to cross. 00:06:12.519 --> 00:06:16.319 We could just get on with life and they can just carry on as it is. 00:06:16.319 --> 00:06:17.519 And we can be the same. 00:06:17.519 --> 00:06:21.879 People can make a mess of things and relationships can be broken down. 00:06:21.879 --> 00:06:22.879 People can get hurt. 00:06:22.879 --> 00:06:27.159 And yet it's so easy to think, well, the least awkward solution is just to act as if the 00:06:27.159 --> 00:06:30.759 problem isn't there. 00:06:30.759 --> 00:06:39.199 But we need to recognize that that's an enormous mistake because it's basically saying, I'd 00:06:39.199 --> 00:06:46.759 rather be permanently broken than be temporarily awkward. 00:06:46.759 --> 00:06:52.719 Because dealing with brokenness is awkward because when we do so, we are exposing ourselves 00:06:52.719 --> 00:06:57.719 to all the vulnerability that that awkwardness will involve. 00:06:57.720 --> 00:07:04.920 But if we just avoid the awkwardness and avoid the vulnerability, then that means that things 00:07:04.920 --> 00:07:08.360 will inevitably just stay broken. 00:07:08.360 --> 00:07:10.120 That's true medically. 00:07:10.120 --> 00:07:14.240 If you want to get a diagnosis and treatment, then you need to go through the awkwardness 00:07:14.240 --> 00:07:16.280 of an examination. 00:07:16.280 --> 00:07:19.360 It's true in terms of education. 00:07:19.360 --> 00:07:22.880 If you want to learn something, you need to go through the awkwardness of being the one 00:07:22.880 --> 00:07:26.000 who hasn't a clue and who needs to be taught. 00:07:26.000 --> 00:07:31.600 And it's definitely through spiritually to fix broken relationships and difficult situations 00:07:31.600 --> 00:07:37.959 we need to be ready to make ourselves vulnerable to the awkwardness that that might bring instead 00:07:37.959 --> 00:07:41.319 of trying to pretend it's not there. 00:07:41.319 --> 00:07:49.279 The key thing I think that we need to remember is that in situations like this, choosing 00:07:49.279 --> 00:08:01.359 to stay broken in order to avoid being temporarily vulnerable is bonkers. 00:08:01.359 --> 00:08:06.319 But addressing awkward situations like this doesn't mean kind of charging in and just 00:08:06.319 --> 00:08:08.279 fixing everything. 00:08:08.279 --> 00:08:12.319 These situations need to be handled with great care. 00:08:12.319 --> 00:08:18.159 And that's exactly what we see in Paul, which brings us to the second heading, real maturity. 00:08:18.160 --> 00:08:23.320 I think Paul's handling of this whole situation is remarkable. 00:08:23.320 --> 00:08:28.880 And we see that if we look a little bit more closely at the language that he uses in this 00:08:28.880 --> 00:08:31.320 kind of middle section of the letter. 00:08:31.320 --> 00:08:33.680 I want to notice three things under this heading. 00:08:33.680 --> 00:08:40.480 How Paul describes himself, how he talks about onesimus, and how he speaks to Philomon. 00:08:40.480 --> 00:08:47.879 So how does Paul describe himself with pop verses 8 to 16 and will highlight certain 00:08:47.879 --> 00:08:48.879 key things. 00:08:48.879 --> 00:08:53.279 There's three phrases in particular that Paul uses to describe himself. 00:08:53.279 --> 00:08:58.639 Verse 9, he calls himself an old man and he calls himself a prisoner. 00:08:58.639 --> 00:09:03.879 And then in verse 10, he describes himself as onesimus's father. 00:09:03.879 --> 00:09:08.439 Even in these three terms, there's a lot we could say, I want to focus especially on 00:09:08.439 --> 00:09:13.759 the fact that Paul describes himself as an old man. 00:09:13.759 --> 00:09:19.879 And the reason I want to focus on that phrase old man is not so much because Paul is near 00:09:19.879 --> 00:09:27.840 the end of his life, but it's more because I think Paul displays great maturity in what 00:09:27.840 --> 00:09:29.600 he says. 00:09:29.600 --> 00:09:35.600 This maturity is crucial for resolving this awkward situation. 00:09:35.600 --> 00:09:39.679 And it's crucial in our lives as Christians as well. 00:09:39.679 --> 00:09:46.599 Now, to help us think about this, I am going to teach you two Gaelic words. 00:09:46.599 --> 00:09:50.759 These are two Gaelic words that you will probably know, but if you do not know them, 00:09:50.759 --> 00:09:54.000 you will be delighted that you do know them in a moment. 00:09:54.000 --> 00:09:57.599 So these two Gaelic words are Badaach and Kayach. 00:09:57.599 --> 00:10:00.199 Does anyone know what they mean? 00:10:00.199 --> 00:10:01.759 I know some of you do. 00:10:01.759 --> 00:10:06.000 They mean an old man and an old woman. 00:10:06.000 --> 00:10:10.879 So these are two Gaelic words you want to learn, Badaach and Kayach. 00:10:10.879 --> 00:10:14.840 When Paul speaks here, he says, I'm a Badaach. 00:10:14.840 --> 00:10:15.840 He's an old man. 00:10:15.840 --> 00:10:19.240 In other words, he's a mature Christian. 00:10:19.240 --> 00:10:23.879 And that has a big influence on what he says. 00:10:23.879 --> 00:10:26.559 So how does he talk to Onesimus? 00:10:26.559 --> 00:10:33.279 Well, in verse 10, you'll see he uses the phrase, my child, in describing Onesimus. 00:10:33.279 --> 00:10:36.439 And he refers to himself as Onesimus' father. 00:10:36.439 --> 00:10:42.199 That kind of language is revealing a strong paternal care in Paul. 00:10:42.199 --> 00:10:44.439 He sees himself as Onesimus' father. 00:10:44.439 --> 00:10:46.679 He looks upon him as his child. 00:10:46.679 --> 00:10:50.679 Elsewhere in the New Testament, Paul does exactly the same thing in regard to Timothy 00:10:50.679 --> 00:10:53.480 and Titus. 00:10:53.480 --> 00:10:59.559 Then in verse 11, we see that Paul talks about Onesimus being useless and then useful. 00:10:59.559 --> 00:11:06.759 That's actually a very clever use of words because the name Onesimus actually means useful. 00:11:06.759 --> 00:11:10.439 Here Paul is showing that he's got a kind of broader perspective. 00:11:10.439 --> 00:11:13.759 He's got the maturity to see that, yes, Onesimus was useless. 00:11:13.759 --> 00:11:16.039 He let Philomondown. 00:11:16.039 --> 00:11:21.119 But that uselessness of that moment is not the end of the story. 00:11:21.119 --> 00:11:27.559 He can see that there's no great potential in Onesimus to be useful. 00:11:27.559 --> 00:11:31.639 And then in verse 12, when he talks about sending Onesimus back, he says, I'm sending 00:11:31.639 --> 00:11:34.159 my very heart. 00:11:34.159 --> 00:11:41.879 And down in verse 16, you can see he describes him as a beloved brother, especially to me. 00:11:41.879 --> 00:11:47.079 And this language reveals a really strong family instinct in Paul. 00:11:47.079 --> 00:11:52.399 It's always looking at Onesimus and Philomondown as his descendants, as his family. 00:11:52.399 --> 00:11:56.839 And just as an old man can look down on his children and grandchildren and see part of 00:11:56.840 --> 00:12:04.200 him in them, Paul sees part of himself in Onesimus and Philomondown and he seeks to bring them 00:12:04.200 --> 00:12:05.200 together. 00:12:05.200 --> 00:12:11.280 Now, all of this is pointing us towards a fascinating emphasis in the New Testament 00:12:11.280 --> 00:12:15.600 that I think we very often neglect today. 00:12:15.600 --> 00:12:22.519 So let me ask the question, when we describe other Christians, what do we tend to say? 00:12:22.519 --> 00:12:30.519 Well, we say things like our church family, our brothers and sisters, our fellow believers, 00:12:30.519 --> 00:12:33.240 our fellow Christians. 00:12:33.240 --> 00:12:41.879 Do we ever describe other Christians as our parents or as our children? 00:12:41.879 --> 00:12:48.199 Yet that's exactly what Paul is doing here. 00:12:48.200 --> 00:12:52.420 And here we're being reminded of the fact that in the Christian church, there is always 00:12:52.420 --> 00:12:56.280 a desperate need for buttocks and kayaks. 00:12:56.280 --> 00:13:02.560 And what I mean by that is the fact that each new generation of Christians needs the support, 00:13:02.560 --> 00:13:07.560 the care and the wisdom of those who are further on in their faith. 00:13:07.560 --> 00:13:13.080 And that makes perfect sense because the journey that we embark on as Christians is one that 00:13:13.080 --> 00:13:18.180 takes us from immaturity to maturity. 00:13:18.179 --> 00:13:22.679 You must never forget that the CV for becoming a Christian is completely blank. 00:13:22.679 --> 00:13:27.799 In other words, no one becomes a Christian because they already know this or they've 00:13:27.799 --> 00:13:32.159 already experienced that or they've already achieved this, that and the next thing. 00:13:32.159 --> 00:13:37.959 We only ever become Christians because of what God does for us through Jesus and in 00:13:37.959 --> 00:13:40.719 us by the Holy Spirit. 00:13:40.719 --> 00:13:47.439 And for that reason, the Bible does not describe a new believer as a graduate who has just qualified. 00:13:47.440 --> 00:13:55.400 It describes a new believer as an infant who has just been born. 00:13:55.400 --> 00:14:00.360 And if you think of any newborn baby, what is the one thing that that baby cannot survive 00:14:00.360 --> 00:14:04.000 without? 00:14:04.000 --> 00:14:07.160 Other people. 00:14:07.160 --> 00:14:15.040 The journey to maturity is totally dependent on mature people helping us along. 00:14:15.039 --> 00:14:19.759 As true in life, Paul is reminding us that it's exactly the same in the church. 00:14:19.759 --> 00:14:25.599 That's why the Christian church always needs to be an intergenerational body of people. 00:14:25.599 --> 00:14:31.199 So if you're a younger Christian, how is it that you know Jesus? 00:14:31.199 --> 00:14:36.159 It's because of the Botox and Chiox that God raised up before you and through whom you 00:14:36.159 --> 00:14:39.879 heard the message of Jesus. 00:14:39.879 --> 00:14:44.839 And if you are an older Christian, how is that message of Jesus going to continue into 00:14:44.840 --> 00:14:47.080 generations to come? 00:14:47.080 --> 00:14:52.759 It is through the new generation that God is raising up. 00:14:52.759 --> 00:14:57.759 The whole advancement of the gospel and the success of the mission of God in Jesus Christ 00:14:57.759 --> 00:15:04.600 is bound up in the fact that we are all fathers, mothers, children, grandparents in the faith. 00:15:04.600 --> 00:15:09.560 Now, as I say all that, the key thing is not actually age. 00:15:09.560 --> 00:15:13.519 The key thing is maturity. 00:15:13.519 --> 00:15:18.319 So in the Christian church, often the Botox and the Chiox will be old men and women, but 00:15:18.319 --> 00:15:20.720 not always. 00:15:20.720 --> 00:15:23.159 And a good example of that is Paul. 00:15:23.159 --> 00:15:28.240 So with Philharmonic, how old do you think Paul was when he wrote this letter? 00:15:28.240 --> 00:15:30.240 Do you know? 00:15:30.240 --> 00:15:36.039 Well, you can guess in your mind, but we're not 100% sure, but it's probably that he 00:15:36.039 --> 00:15:40.240 was about 55. 00:15:40.240 --> 00:15:44.600 It's the same age as Derrick or just about. 00:15:44.600 --> 00:15:51.080 So from my perspective, of course, that's ancient, but for many of you, I'm sure that 00:15:51.080 --> 00:15:53.639 still seems young. 00:15:53.639 --> 00:15:59.039 And Paul at 55, even at that age, he'd been a mature Christian for a long time, a long 00:15:59.039 --> 00:16:00.600 time. 00:16:00.600 --> 00:16:06.120 So you don't need to be in your 80s to be a spiritual father or mother to someone coming 00:16:06.120 --> 00:16:07.360 behind you. 00:16:07.360 --> 00:16:12.039 It's just a case of being further on in your journey to maturity in the faith. 00:16:12.039 --> 00:16:14.399 That can be someone in their 30s. 00:16:14.399 --> 00:16:18.440 Sometimes it can be even younger than that. 00:16:18.440 --> 00:16:23.519 So if you're a younger Christian, you need Botox and Chiox. 00:16:23.519 --> 00:16:30.080 So please look at the more mature Christians around you, not just as brothers and sisters, 00:16:30.080 --> 00:16:36.240 but as fathers, mothers, grannies, grandpas, and please spend time with them and get to 00:16:36.240 --> 00:16:39.960 know them because they will teach you many important things. 00:16:39.960 --> 00:16:42.480 They'll teach you how to pray. 00:16:42.480 --> 00:16:45.799 They'll tell you about God's faithfulness in their lives. 00:16:45.799 --> 00:16:47.560 They'll help you read the Bible. 00:16:47.560 --> 00:16:52.159 They'll be able to share about all the big changes in life, becoming an adult, getting 00:16:52.159 --> 00:16:58.039 a job, getting married, having children, serving in the church, suffering loss, facing illness. 00:16:58.039 --> 00:17:03.200 The Botox and the Chiox have walked all these paths before you, and they are a brilliant 00:17:03.200 --> 00:17:05.079 help. 00:17:05.079 --> 00:17:11.480 And if you are a Botox or a Chiox, please look at younger Christians as your precious 00:17:11.480 --> 00:17:17.079 children and please remember that they need you. 00:17:17.079 --> 00:17:21.799 They need to know that you're there for them, that you've got their back, that you're praying 00:17:21.799 --> 00:17:24.799 for them, and that you love them. 00:17:24.799 --> 00:17:27.480 Now, that doesn't mean having all the answers. 00:17:27.480 --> 00:17:29.579 Even Paul didn't have all the answers. 00:17:29.579 --> 00:17:35.799 It just means that every new Christian in this church has an army of mothers, fathers, 00:17:35.799 --> 00:17:40.960 grannies and grandpas ready to help them as they begin to grow. 00:17:40.960 --> 00:17:46.119 And if we think like that, we realize that an older generation in the church is not an 00:17:46.119 --> 00:17:49.319 inconvenience that's out of touch. 00:17:49.319 --> 00:17:53.919 And we realize that a new generation in the church is not a threat. 00:17:53.920 --> 00:18:00.480 We are a family where every generation is dependent on the next. 00:18:00.480 --> 00:18:03.840 But maybe you're asking yourself the question, well, how do I know which one I am? 00:18:03.840 --> 00:18:08.320 Am I still new and needing help, or am I further on and able to provide help? 00:18:08.320 --> 00:18:13.160 I think the answer to that question is that unless you are a very, very new convert or 00:18:13.160 --> 00:18:21.080 unless your foot is on the doorstep to heaven, you're probably both. 00:18:21.079 --> 00:18:25.079 And so you may feel like you still need the help of those who've gone before you. 00:18:25.079 --> 00:18:26.159 That's absolutely true. 00:18:26.159 --> 00:18:30.559 But you can still also give help to those who are coming behind. 00:18:30.559 --> 00:18:37.199 It's all a brilliant reminder that God's design for his church is one where we all need each 00:18:37.199 --> 00:18:39.879 other. 00:18:39.879 --> 00:18:49.480 And that, of course, is why reconciliation in this awkward situation is so important, 00:18:49.480 --> 00:18:55.279 which brings us to the language that Paul uses in addressing Philimon. 00:18:55.279 --> 00:18:56.559 So how does he speak to him? 00:18:56.559 --> 00:18:59.360 Well, I want you to notice two things. 00:18:59.360 --> 00:19:04.319 First of all, I want you to see that Paul shows great maturity in the request that 00:19:04.319 --> 00:19:06.480 he makes towards Philimon. 00:19:06.480 --> 00:19:09.960 Notice the language in verses eight and nine or nine and ten. 00:19:09.960 --> 00:19:11.200 Nine and ten it is. 00:19:11.200 --> 00:19:16.039 He speaks about appealing to Philimon. 00:19:16.039 --> 00:19:24.359 So yes, he has the authority to demand Philimon to do what he wants, but he deliberately chooses 00:19:24.359 --> 00:19:26.359 not to do that. 00:19:26.359 --> 00:19:28.599 And he explains that more in verse 14. 00:19:28.599 --> 00:19:30.399 He says, I'm looking for your consent. 00:19:30.399 --> 00:19:32.519 I don't want you to do anything out of compulsion. 00:19:32.519 --> 00:19:36.799 I want you to act on your own accord. 00:19:36.799 --> 00:19:40.000 Here Paul is showing deep respect towards Philimon. 00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:46.000 He recognizes not an easy situation for him, but he appeals to him to follow a certain 00:19:46.000 --> 00:19:48.279 course of action. 00:19:48.279 --> 00:19:55.799 Now I think this is a very good example of a mature use of authority. 00:19:55.799 --> 00:20:00.079 Paul as he says himself here, he has the authority to demand the outcome that he wants, but he 00:20:00.079 --> 00:20:02.319 deliberately refuses to do that. 00:20:02.319 --> 00:20:09.279 Instead, he reasons with Philimon and he makes an appeal to him and in doing so he shows 00:20:09.279 --> 00:20:11.720 him great respect. 00:20:11.720 --> 00:20:17.680 And I think this is a great reminder that real authority is not about forcing someone 00:20:17.680 --> 00:20:23.400 to do something so that they're coerced by you. 00:20:23.400 --> 00:20:33.120 Real authority is about showing someone a better path so that they are convinced by you. 00:20:33.120 --> 00:20:40.600 When we are immature, we tend to think that if I have authority, then people will respect 00:20:40.600 --> 00:20:41.600 me. 00:20:41.599 --> 00:20:44.240 I get thought like that as a more immature man. 00:20:44.240 --> 00:20:49.199 If I have authority, people should show me respect. 00:20:49.199 --> 00:20:53.559 Maturity tells us that the truth is the other way around. 00:20:53.559 --> 00:21:00.079 If you show people respect, then you will gain authority. 00:21:00.079 --> 00:21:02.559 So if you want authority, you can't coerce people. 00:21:02.559 --> 00:21:03.679 Paul is showing us that. 00:21:03.679 --> 00:21:07.759 The moment you impose your authority, you lose it. 00:21:07.759 --> 00:21:09.759 And I think we've probably all experienced that. 00:21:09.759 --> 00:21:17.920 When you're in school and your teacher is just really hard on you, they lose your respect. 00:21:17.920 --> 00:21:23.799 And any authority they have is one that you will escape from as quickly as you possibly 00:21:23.799 --> 00:21:24.799 can. 00:21:24.799 --> 00:21:29.359 Same with a colleague or a boss that tries to exert themselves. 00:21:29.359 --> 00:21:36.480 It will instantly antagonize you and make you just want to remove yourself from being 00:21:36.480 --> 00:21:38.079 under them. 00:21:38.079 --> 00:21:43.480 If you want to have authority, real authority, you won't gain it if you coerce people. 00:21:43.480 --> 00:21:47.799 You will have it if you can convince people. 00:21:47.799 --> 00:21:50.240 And that's exactly what Paul is doing. 00:21:50.240 --> 00:21:55.839 Moreover, Paul has the maturity to know that forcing Philharmon into submission is only 00:21:55.839 --> 00:21:58.559 going to achieve something superficial. 00:21:58.559 --> 00:22:02.519 Any goodness that comes by compulsion is going to be shallow. 00:22:02.519 --> 00:22:05.960 And under the surface, things will still be awkward. 00:22:05.960 --> 00:22:12.200 But by appealing to Philharmon in this way with respect and sincerity, then it's much 00:22:12.200 --> 00:22:16.519 more likely to bring real restoration. 00:22:16.519 --> 00:22:20.799 So he shows great maturity in the request he makes of Philharmon. 00:22:20.799 --> 00:22:27.400 He also shows his maturity in the perspective that Paul has of the situation. 00:22:27.400 --> 00:22:28.400 Look at verse 15. 00:22:28.400 --> 00:22:33.640 I've just highlighted it there for you on the screen. 00:22:33.640 --> 00:22:40.360 Another Paul is offering an explanation as to why this whole situation has arisen. 00:22:40.360 --> 00:22:43.840 And he gives this brilliant contrast, we say, well, maybe the reason he was parted for you 00:22:43.840 --> 00:22:46.520 for a while was that you might have him back forever. 00:22:46.520 --> 00:22:50.400 And that's a wonderful perspective to have. 00:22:50.400 --> 00:22:56.880 Instead of focusing on the pain and difficulty of the moment, he's looking at the bigger 00:22:56.880 --> 00:22:59.880 picture. 00:22:59.880 --> 00:23:05.920 He's recognizing the fact that the brokenness of their circumstances does not need to be 00:23:05.920 --> 00:23:06.920 the end of the story. 00:23:06.920 --> 00:23:10.760 There is always hope of healing. 00:23:10.760 --> 00:23:18.960 But in making this comment, Paul uses, I think, a very interesting and a very important word. 00:23:18.960 --> 00:23:27.360 It's a word that is crucial, I think, for any attempts that we make to analyze the experiences 00:23:27.359 --> 00:23:30.519 that we have in our lives. 00:23:30.519 --> 00:23:34.039 Can you see the word? 00:23:34.039 --> 00:23:42.000 It is the word, perhaps. 00:23:42.000 --> 00:23:44.039 I think that's a really important word. 00:23:44.039 --> 00:23:47.519 And I think it's a word that displays great maturity. 00:23:47.519 --> 00:23:52.279 Because so often we can kind of walk up to situations and see things going on in other 00:23:52.279 --> 00:23:55.719 people's lives and say, oh, this is why it's happening. 00:23:55.720 --> 00:23:59.880 And we confidently offer our own conclusions. 00:23:59.880 --> 00:24:07.480 Paul, a wise botoch, has the maturity to know that anything he says by way of analysis or 00:24:07.480 --> 00:24:13.759 explanation in someone else's life should always begin with the word, perhaps. 00:24:13.759 --> 00:24:15.160 That's not to say he's guessing. 00:24:15.160 --> 00:24:16.799 I think he was probably right. 00:24:16.799 --> 00:24:22.920 But he has the maturity to recognize that he is not the source of all authority and 00:24:22.920 --> 00:24:25.840 wisdom in circumstances like that. 00:24:25.840 --> 00:24:29.600 And if we're trying to understand the circumstances in our lives or in other people's lives, if 00:24:29.600 --> 00:24:37.039 we're trying to give people answers, we will be wise to always remember the word, perhaps. 00:24:37.039 --> 00:24:46.200 So Paul is respectful, he's warm, he's optimistic in his language. 00:24:46.200 --> 00:24:50.720 And over it all is a beautiful phrase at the start of verse nine. 00:24:50.720 --> 00:24:52.480 I forgot to highlight it. 00:24:52.480 --> 00:24:53.480 So please forgive me. 00:24:53.480 --> 00:24:58.680 But I want you to imagine that the first four words of verse nine are highlighted because 00:24:58.680 --> 00:25:04.079 Paul says, yet for love's sake. 00:25:04.079 --> 00:25:11.120 And that phrase, I think, is like an umbrella over everything that he is saying. 00:25:11.120 --> 00:25:17.000 And these are three words for love's sake, three words that need to be written onto all 00:25:17.000 --> 00:25:19.079 of our hearts. 00:25:19.079 --> 00:25:26.439 Because in awkward situations, so often we choose the wrong sake. 00:25:26.439 --> 00:25:29.480 Now, what do I mean by that? 00:25:29.480 --> 00:25:35.000 Well, in an awkward situation, we think, well, we need to sort this person out for the sake 00:25:35.000 --> 00:25:37.240 of justice. 00:25:37.240 --> 00:25:42.679 Or we need to address this situation for the sake of order. 00:25:42.679 --> 00:25:47.480 Or we need to interrogate this person for the sake of truth. 00:25:47.480 --> 00:25:52.640 Or we need to reprimand this person for the sake of our reputation. 00:25:52.640 --> 00:25:57.480 Now, these things are not necessarily bad in their appropriate place. 00:25:57.480 --> 00:26:02.599 But in awkward situations where people are hurt and where relationships are broken, on 00:26:02.599 --> 00:26:09.480 their own, these other sakes will only make things worse. 00:26:09.480 --> 00:26:12.759 So justice will tell you that anesimist should be punished. 00:26:12.759 --> 00:26:15.799 Order will tell you that this slave should have known his place. 00:26:15.799 --> 00:26:19.240 Truth tells you that terrible mistakes have been made. 00:26:19.240 --> 00:26:22.519 Reputation tells you that you need to be proved right. 00:26:22.519 --> 00:26:27.960 Love says, I don't care about any of that. 00:26:27.960 --> 00:26:34.480 I just want this relationship to be restored. 00:26:34.480 --> 00:26:40.680 In awkward situations, love is the governing principle to which everything else must come 00:26:40.680 --> 00:26:41.680 second. 00:26:41.680 --> 00:26:46.640 I've seen this for love's sake, love for Philharmon, love for anesimist, and love for 00:26:46.640 --> 00:26:47.799 his church. 00:26:47.799 --> 00:26:55.440 And the reason he thinks like that is because he sees these people as his children. 00:26:55.440 --> 00:27:01.799 And when someone makes a mistake at work among your friends in your family or even in church, 00:27:01.799 --> 00:27:09.039 always ask yourself the question, what would I do if the person who made this mistake was 00:27:09.039 --> 00:27:13.559 my child? 00:27:13.559 --> 00:27:22.399 Throughout this whole situation, Paul is showing us what real maturity looks like. 00:27:22.399 --> 00:27:27.839 But that raises the question, how could Paul think like that? 00:27:27.839 --> 00:27:31.200 And how can we? 00:27:31.200 --> 00:27:37.720 Well I think the answer to that question is because Paul knew his theology. 00:27:37.720 --> 00:27:42.200 And that brings us to our last heading. 00:27:42.200 --> 00:27:48.039 The apostle Paul is generally regarded as one of the greatest, if not the greatest, theologian 00:27:48.039 --> 00:27:50.360 in the history of the Christian church. 00:27:50.360 --> 00:27:56.880 He wrote 13 New Testament epistles and in these he articulates so many of the key truths 00:27:56.880 --> 00:27:58.920 of Christian theology. 00:27:58.920 --> 00:28:04.759 So you have Romans, an outstanding explanation of how the gospel works, where we learn about 00:28:04.759 --> 00:28:08.920 justification by faith, adoption and union with Christ. 00:28:08.920 --> 00:28:14.519 You have Galatians speaking about our freedom from the law through faith in Jesus. 00:28:14.519 --> 00:28:20.700 You have Ephesians telling us about the eternal, predestinating love of God and the restoration 00:28:20.700 --> 00:28:25.799 of humanity across the dividing lines of Jew and Gentile. 00:28:25.799 --> 00:28:30.920 You have Colossians speaking about the cosmic rule and authority of Jesus. 00:28:30.920 --> 00:28:35.240 You have Corinthians explaining the unity of the church, the gifts of the Holy Spirit 00:28:35.240 --> 00:28:37.519 and the beauty and greatness of love. 00:28:37.519 --> 00:28:43.080 You have Philippians explaining the incredible journey that Jesus undertook from heaven all 00:28:43.080 --> 00:28:47.560 the way to the cross and the joy that that brings to us now. 00:28:47.560 --> 00:28:53.800 All of Paul's letters are bursting with amazing theology. 00:28:53.799 --> 00:29:01.399 And what we need to recognize is that the letter which proves that Paul is a truly great 00:29:01.399 --> 00:29:09.960 theologian is not Romans, not Galatians, not any of these. 00:29:09.960 --> 00:29:16.799 The letter which proves that Paul is a great theologian is Philemon. 00:29:16.799 --> 00:29:21.359 Now, how is that? 00:29:21.359 --> 00:29:31.719 Well, if we ask the question, what is the acid test of a great theologian? 00:29:31.719 --> 00:29:34.899 Is it how much you know? 00:29:34.899 --> 00:29:37.599 Is it how many books you've written? 00:29:37.599 --> 00:29:41.439 Is it how many conferences you've spoken at? 00:29:41.439 --> 00:29:43.639 No. 00:29:43.640 --> 00:29:53.040 The acid test of a great theologian is how you treat other people. 00:29:53.040 --> 00:29:56.360 That's why when Jesus speaks about the day of judgment in Matthew 25, he doesn't say 00:29:56.360 --> 00:29:58.360 a word about your theological knowledge. 00:29:58.360 --> 00:30:03.520 Instead, he asks whether your theology has changed the way you treat other people. 00:30:03.520 --> 00:30:07.800 That's why in John 13, he said, by this, all people will know that you're my disciples 00:30:07.800 --> 00:30:11.240 if you have love for one another. 00:30:11.240 --> 00:30:14.559 That loving one another is absolutely the acid test. 00:30:14.559 --> 00:30:18.200 And of course, Jesus himself is the ultimate example of that. 00:30:18.200 --> 00:30:24.400 And it is this letter to Philemon that shows us that Paul's theology has not just filled 00:30:24.400 --> 00:30:26.039 his head. 00:30:26.039 --> 00:30:31.880 It has transformed the way he treats other people. 00:30:31.880 --> 00:30:36.960 So Paul, the theologian, has a doctrine of anthropology. 00:30:36.960 --> 00:30:39.720 So that means that his theology doesn't just help him understand God. 00:30:39.720 --> 00:30:41.680 It helps him understand people. 00:30:41.680 --> 00:30:47.360 And he looks at Onesimus and he knows that this is a man made in the image of God, but 00:30:47.360 --> 00:30:50.480 who has been broken by sin and who desperately needs Jesus. 00:30:50.480 --> 00:30:53.240 So when he met this runaway slave, he did not shun him. 00:30:53.240 --> 00:30:57.799 He came alongside him and shared the good news of Jesus with him. 00:30:57.799 --> 00:31:00.279 Paul the theologian has a doctrine of the atonement. 00:31:00.279 --> 00:31:06.120 That means he knows that the cross is fully capable of forgiving sin and restoring sinners. 00:31:06.119 --> 00:31:12.719 So he looks at this useless runaway slave and he knows that there is hope for him. 00:31:12.719 --> 00:31:15.599 Paul the theologian has a doctrine of sanctification. 00:31:15.599 --> 00:31:19.439 That means he knows that salvation is not the end of the journey. 00:31:19.439 --> 00:31:21.479 It's just the start. 00:31:21.479 --> 00:31:25.319 And that sanctification is progressive. 00:31:25.319 --> 00:31:28.839 That means that he knows that Onesimus is not the finished article. 00:31:28.839 --> 00:31:32.559 He's got a long way to go, but he's not completely useless anymore. 00:31:32.559 --> 00:31:36.720 He can most definitely be useful in the future. 00:31:36.720 --> 00:31:39.519 Paul the theologian has an ecclesiology. 00:31:39.519 --> 00:31:43.480 That means he knows that the cross does not just bring vertical reconciliation between 00:31:43.480 --> 00:31:44.639 us and God. 00:31:44.639 --> 00:31:51.759 It also brings a horizontal reconciliation between us and which unites us as brothers 00:31:51.759 --> 00:31:54.119 and sisters and Jesus. 00:31:54.119 --> 00:31:59.679 That's why this awkward tension between Philemon and Onesimus needs to be resolved. 00:31:59.680 --> 00:32:04.279 The relationship needs to be restored and for Paul, regarding a fellow Christian as 00:32:04.279 --> 00:32:10.840 an enemy and remaining divided from them is absolutely unthinkable. 00:32:10.840 --> 00:32:14.519 And Paul the theologian has an eschatology. 00:32:14.519 --> 00:32:20.039 So he knows that there's a day of judgment coming and he knows that God alone is the 00:32:20.039 --> 00:32:22.080 judge. 00:32:22.080 --> 00:32:24.560 And that means he knows that he is not the judge. 00:32:24.559 --> 00:32:30.480 Neither is Philemon and God is most definitely big enough to sort out everything on that 00:32:30.480 --> 00:32:32.119 final day. 00:32:32.119 --> 00:32:37.119 Paul's theology has transformed the way he treats others. 00:32:37.119 --> 00:32:44.240 And that means that the best theologians will be the kindest of people because they know 00:32:44.240 --> 00:32:49.079 that we are to display God's goodness as his image bearer. 00:32:49.079 --> 00:32:54.319 The best theologians will be the most patient mentors because they understand that sanctification 00:32:54.319 --> 00:32:55.799 is a process. 00:32:55.799 --> 00:33:01.000 The best theologians will be the most forgiving church members because they know that grace 00:33:01.000 --> 00:33:03.639 is never deserved. 00:33:03.639 --> 00:33:08.279 They will be the most optimistic evangelists because they know that Jesus is risen and 00:33:08.279 --> 00:33:10.879 that the Holy Spirit is empowering us. 00:33:10.879 --> 00:33:21.619 And they will be the least judgmental because they know that God alone is judge. 00:33:21.619 --> 00:33:28.519 And if I am not these things, then I'm an immature theologian. 00:33:28.519 --> 00:33:32.279 And the knowledge I have doesn't count for much. 00:33:32.279 --> 00:33:40.359 Paul sums this up incredibly powerfully in a verse that's written about theologians. 00:33:40.359 --> 00:33:48.679 He says, if I have prophetic powers and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I 00:33:48.680 --> 00:33:59.320 have all faith so as to remove mountains but have not love, I'm nothing. 00:33:59.320 --> 00:34:07.240 For all of us, we're actually all theologians, but we all need that theology to shape the 00:34:07.240 --> 00:34:13.360 way we treat other people. 00:34:13.360 --> 00:34:17.680 So in this letter, we see real people, real maturity and real theology. 00:34:17.679 --> 00:34:21.399 I want to conclude with two very brief questions. 00:34:21.399 --> 00:34:28.759 One, what would an awkward convert look like today? 00:34:28.759 --> 00:34:40.199 An ex, an addict, someone who's transitioned, an enemy, someone who's treated us badly or 00:34:40.199 --> 00:34:44.759 who we just really struggle with. 00:34:44.760 --> 00:34:51.000 In these situations, our prayer needs to be, by God's grace, let us show God's grace. 00:34:51.000 --> 00:34:57.160 Onesimus must have felt very awkward coming back to Philemon, but one thing he knew was 00:34:57.160 --> 00:35:03.120 that he had Paul's heart and Paul had his back. 00:35:03.120 --> 00:35:07.840 And we wanted to always be the case that whoever connects with us as a church, that they would 00:35:07.840 --> 00:35:16.519 come away knowing that they have got our very heart and we have got their backs. 00:35:16.519 --> 00:35:25.440 The second question is, do you feel like the awkward one? 00:35:25.440 --> 00:35:28.000 Maybe you do. 00:35:28.000 --> 00:35:33.720 Maybe you feel like everybody else has got it together or is further on than you are 00:35:33.719 --> 00:35:40.639 and that you are the awkward one when it comes to church and faith and Jesus. 00:35:40.639 --> 00:35:48.159 Well, one of the amazing things that this letter is teaching us is that nothing and 00:35:48.159 --> 00:35:53.159 no one is ever too awkward for Jesus. 00:35:53.159 --> 00:35:56.519 And the truth is we're all awkward. 00:35:56.519 --> 00:35:57.839 We all have baggage. 00:35:57.839 --> 00:36:01.559 It's just that some people's mess is easier to hide. 00:36:01.559 --> 00:36:06.639 But no matter how awkward you feel about yourself, no matter how much you feel like the odd one 00:36:06.639 --> 00:36:11.759 out, no matter how much you feel like everyone else is in a better place than you, Jesus 00:36:11.759 --> 00:36:15.880 is saying, you have got my very heart. 00:36:15.880 --> 00:36:18.920 You have a place in my family. 00:36:18.920 --> 00:36:23.079 You are so precious to me. 00:36:23.079 --> 00:36:31.880 And the reason we know that is because our three headings apply to Jesus as well. 00:36:31.880 --> 00:36:36.759 So Jesus is the most realistic of all people. 00:36:36.759 --> 00:36:41.159 He knows your story, every detail of it. 00:36:41.159 --> 00:36:43.319 Nothing will shock him. 00:36:43.319 --> 00:36:46.039 Jesus is the most mature person of all. 00:36:46.039 --> 00:36:49.239 That means he's not a never an idiot. 00:36:49.239 --> 00:36:53.279 He's not going to jump to conclusions about you. 00:36:53.279 --> 00:36:57.399 And Jesus is the greatest theologian of all. 00:36:57.399 --> 00:37:03.199 And that means that he knows when it comes to his grace, there is enough for you. 00:37:03.199 --> 00:37:07.839 When it comes to his family, there is room for you. 00:37:07.839 --> 00:37:15.839 When it comes to his love, Jesus is saying, I died for you too. 00:37:15.840 --> 00:37:24.079 You will never, ever be too awkward for him. 00:37:24.079 --> 00:37:31.840 I guess the question we all have to ask is, is Jesus too awkward for you? 00:37:31.840 --> 00:37:33.840 Let's pray. 00:37:33.840 --> 00:37:49.280 Dear Father, we thank you so much that everything you teach us is not just for our heads, but 00:37:49.280 --> 00:37:52.519 it's to shape our lives. 00:37:52.519 --> 00:38:01.760 And we pray that in every way that we can, we would show your love to others, that we 00:38:01.760 --> 00:38:06.960 really would be those who love you and who love our neighbor. 00:38:06.960 --> 00:38:13.200 Please keep writing your truth on our hearts until it transforms the way that we treat 00:38:13.200 --> 00:38:15.720 other people. 00:38:15.720 --> 00:38:23.440 Forgive us for the times that we have been, just for the times we failed to show your 00:38:23.440 --> 00:38:27.120 goodness to others in our lives. 00:38:27.119 --> 00:38:31.799 And instead, may we see people as you see them. 00:38:31.799 --> 00:38:35.839 May we love people in the way that you love them. 00:38:35.839 --> 00:38:44.119 And may we just show your kindness and goodness in every way that we can in the week ahead. 00:38:44.119 --> 00:38:47.359 Please draw us all closer to you and closer to each other. 00:38:47.359 --> 00:38:50.719 We need you and we need one another so much. 00:38:50.719 --> 00:39:00.119 Amen.