WEBVTT

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 I'm turning to Ephesians chapter 5, Ephesians 5, verse 22, on page 979.

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 Obviously, last week's sermon on marriage, and I'm looking at fatherhood last Sunday night for Acer issues,

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! And I want to recommend two books to you. First of all, they're both on the book called The Meaning of Marriage.

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 Timothy and Kathy Keller is a terrific book. Just a very, very helpful book. It's an honest book.

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 I think it's by far the best thing out there on marriage, so I'd really recommend that.

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 And then a book on fatherhood by Tony Payne. What is it? And what's it for?

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 And it's readable and simple and a really, really good book. So I'd recommend that. I think it's about six quid.

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 And then one more thing is, we're going to have at the end of February on a Sunday night, hopefully the start of something regular,

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 we're going to have a question and answer session. And so this sermon, I hope every sermon raises questions.

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 And Church Life raises questions. And you might think, why on earth can they do it that way?

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 And so there's a question box at the back. It's in the blue file. We're hoping we get a nicely decorated question box soon.

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 But if you've got any questions, put them in there. And we'll seek to try and answer them on the last Sunday night of February.

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 And I hope it'll be the start of a regular thing. But I think it's a good thing for us to do.

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 So, second sermon on marriage. And this is the last one.

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 Here are the headlines from last week. If you missed last week, here they are.

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 A marriage works when it copies the divine marriage between Christ and the church.

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 A marriage works when it copies the divine marriage between Christ and the church.

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 And a marriage works when the husband and wife play different roles.

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 For the wife, the part of submission and respect.

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 And for the husband, the part of headship and love.

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 Last week was a sermon on the pattern of marriage.

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 Christ is like a groom who loves us covenantally and unbreakably.

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 And we, the church, are his bride.

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 Christ did certain things for us.

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 And in return, we do certain things towards him.

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 And that, says Paul, is the pattern for marriage.

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 The pattern for all marriages.

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 Which, over time, become deeply beautiful marriages.

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 The man acts like Christ, who is the head of his body.

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 And the husband is the head.

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 Now I said last week that I take that to mean that the husband is completely responsible for everything that happens in a marriage.

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 Completely responsible.

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 For everything that happens in a marriage.

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 And you might want to listen to that last week to see why I say that and what it means.

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 Because Christ is completely responsible.

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 For everything that happens in a marriage.

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 The woman acts like the church, who is the bride of Christ.

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 And has a role of submission to her head.

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 Like the church submits to Christ.

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 So what does it actually mean?

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 What does it actually look like?

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 What are we saying that a marriage that does these things looks like?

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 So four points.

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 And I'm going to give you them at the front.

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 Because I might not spell them out clearly enough as we go on.

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 First of all, headship carries a deadly cross.

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 And then secondly, love bestows loveliness.

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 And submission, thirdly, creates a voluntary unity.

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 And thirdly, respect bestows dignity.

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 They're really catchy, aren't they?

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 Headship carries a deadly cross.

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 Love bestows loveliness.

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 Submission creates a voluntary unity.

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 And respect bestows dignity.

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 Now I don't know whether you noticed.

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 Two points for the husband.

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 Two points for the wife.

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 And the first of these points is this.

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 About the practical application and the meaning of their roles.

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 What headship looks like, what it means,

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 is that a husband has an instrument of execution strapped to his back.

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 That's what headship means.

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 And what submission actually means,

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 it looks like a woman who brings into existence

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 one new unity of two.

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 One new entity of two.

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 So two points related to the meaning of their roles.

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 And then two points related to what the wife and the husband actually do.

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 So men, husbands, your job is to bestow loveliness on your wife.

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 And wives, your job is to bestow dignity on your husbands.

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 So I'm going to reverse the passage.

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 I hope you don't mind me doing that.

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 I'm going to speak to husbands first.

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 And then wives.

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 My reason for that is the weight of Paul's argument falls on husbands.

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 So in the original text there are 40 words to wives.

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 But 115 words to husbands.

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 And culturally at the time, I think this is profoundly significant.

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 Because it was very commonplace in the New Testament era

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 for wives to be told to submit to their husbands.

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 But it was commonly joined with injunctions.

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 With husbands being told, you keep your wives in submission.

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 So wives submit.

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 And husbands, you make sure they submit.

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 An order at home, a submissive wife, obedient children.

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 Good standing in society and all is well.

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 But that is not the way the Bible says it.

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 And that is not so with the Apostle Paul.

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 With Christian men and Christian husbands,

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 in Colossians 3, Paul simply tells husbands

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 not to be harsh with their wives.

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 And I wonder if it's any less true

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 that male harshness and male unkindness

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 is endemic in marriage.

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 And I would want to say that male harshness

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 is endemic regardless of whether somebody

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 accepts or rejects

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 what we might call from this parish

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 traditional gender roles in marriage.

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 It's a problem that every male faces.

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 Because it's perfectly possible, isn't it,

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 for somebody, maybe for you to say,

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 in our marriage we're not going to go in

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 for all this headship and all this submission.

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 That is simply demeaning to a woman.

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 And we're going to have completely identical roles

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 in our marriage in every way.

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 And it's possible for a couple to do that.

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 But for harshness still to surface

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 in the male heart.

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 And it's possible,

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 even when you have identical roles

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 and say, I'm not going in for this,

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 for lack of respect,

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 it still surfaced in the female heart.

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 Now what is going to fix it?

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 And I want to suggest this.

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 What will begin to fix it,

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 or will at least begin to suck the poison

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 of male harshness,

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 where it matters in our hearts,

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 is understanding who I am in my marriage.

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 And how I'm meant to be who I am.

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 Who I am.

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 Husbands are heads.

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 That is who I am.

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 That is who you are.

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 And I think Paul shows us

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 that headship

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 carries a deadly cross.

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 That is, if you like,

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 the basic principle of the passage.

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 Remember chapter 5, verse 25.

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 Husbands, love your wives

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 as Christ loved the church

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 and gave himself a prayer.

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 Do you see the meaning?

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 Husbands, love your wives

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 in the same way that Christ loved his bride.

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 How did Christ love his bride?

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 By dying for her.

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 By sacrificing himself for her.

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 Now Christ's death does many things

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 for all his people

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 which we can never imitate

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 and we can never copy, can we?

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 So, we cannot be forsaken by God

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 for each other.

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 Or we cannot

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 take the punishment for one another

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 in place of each other.

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 We cannot bear God's wrath for sin

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 in place of each other.

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 But,

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 the principle here is

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 we can lay down our lives

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 for each other.

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 And Paul says,

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 if you want to know

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 what a husband's headship looks like,

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 it looks like a man

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 on 30 or 40

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 or 50 years

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 on death row.

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 So we went in America

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 and stayed with one of Chuck's friends

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 who was a great character

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 and he got married

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 and after his marriage

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 the first words

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 that his father-in-law said to him

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 we shook his hand and said

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 it's a death sentence.

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 However long God gives you

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 in your marriage

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 headship carries

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 a deadly cross.

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 Because the head,

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 the husband,

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 is copying the one

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 who carried a deadly cross.

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 Christian headship in marriage

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 is in the shape of a cross.

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 Now this is why I think

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 nothing, nothing comes close

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 to the beauty

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 and the power of this marriage

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 in any kind of contemporary thought

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 or relationship advice.

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 I read in a Christian book

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 on marriage this week

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 that marriage is all about 50-50.

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 Each couple has to give 50%

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 to make 100%.

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 Absolute rubbish.

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 What about if each person

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 gives 100%?

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 100% of themselves.

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 Well surely that is better.

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 It's nonsense to think about that.

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 I have in my life

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 people who I know

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 who would literally die for me.

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 I know for instance

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 my parents in their late 70s

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 even at my age now

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 they would still give their life for me

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 if they had to.

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 And there is incredible beauty

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 isn't there?

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 And blessing

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 in knowing that you are loved

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 to the point of death

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 by another human being.

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 So Paul says to Ephesian husbands

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 and he says to IPC husbands

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 your wife needs a husband

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 who dies for her.

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 Now please obviously

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 it's not literal.

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 But it is to the point

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 of constant

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 and willing sacrifice

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 of yourself for her.

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 And we men

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 need to be told this

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 because we don't really do it.

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 So if you watch

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 a young mum

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 with her children

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 if you watch the young mums

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 in IPC

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 with their children

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 when you watch closely

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 you see

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 the natural self-sacrifice

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 on behalf of their children.

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 A mother has a kind of

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 built-in mechanism

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 doesn't she

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 of laying down her life.

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 Young mums do that.

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 To allow their children

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 to thrive

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 and fathers

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 well we can do it as well

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 and some do do it

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 but generally

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 it is true

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 that women

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 are much better

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 at surrendering themselves

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 for the sake

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 of another.

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 So here is a very

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 very simple

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 diagnostic question

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 for you

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 of your husband

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 this morning.

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 I ask the children

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 to ask their dancers

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 in Sunday school.

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 What are you going

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 without husbands?

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 What are you doing

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 with?

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 What are you knowing

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 the loss of

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 so that your wife

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 can flourish?

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 Where are you

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 tasting death

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 for her?

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 Loss of

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 man cave time?

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 Loss of mate time?

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 Less advancement

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 in your career

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 than you would have

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 hoped on?

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 Less of just

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 me time?

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 This is C.S. Lewis

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 writing beautifully

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 on the husband's

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 headship.

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 The headship then

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 C.S. Lewis says

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 is most fully embodied

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 not in the husband

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 we sure wish to be

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 but in him

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 whose marriage

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 is the most

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 like a crucifixion.

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 Whose wife

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 receives most

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 and gives least

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 whose wife

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 is the most

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 unworthy of him

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 whose wife

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 is the least

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 lovable

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 the anointing

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 of this terrible

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 coronation

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 is not to be seen

00:11:41.800 --> 00:11:42.360
 in the joys

00:11:42.360 --> 00:11:43.200
 of any man's

00:11:43.200 --> 00:11:43.639
 marriage

00:11:43.639 --> 00:11:44.460
 but it is

00:11:44.460 --> 00:11:45.500
 in its sorrows

00:11:45.500 --> 00:11:46.240
 in the sickness

00:11:46.240 --> 00:11:47.200
 and sufferings

00:11:47.200 --> 00:11:48.060
 of a good wife

00:11:48.060 --> 00:11:48.759
 or the faults

00:11:48.759 --> 00:11:49.700
 of a bad wife.

00:11:50.700 --> 00:11:52.139
 It is unwearying

00:11:52.139 --> 00:11:53.440
 and never paraded

00:11:53.440 --> 00:11:53.940
 care

00:11:53.940 --> 00:11:54.820
 or in his

00:11:54.820 --> 00:11:55.780
 inexhaustible

00:11:55.780 --> 00:11:56.280
 forgiveness.

00:11:56.780 --> 00:11:57.280
 Lewis says

00:11:57.280 --> 00:11:58.019
 the sternest

00:11:58.019 --> 00:11:59.080
 feminist critic

00:11:59.080 --> 00:12:00.360
 need not grudge

00:12:00.360 --> 00:12:01.019
 my sex

00:12:01.019 --> 00:12:01.580
 the crown

00:12:01.580 --> 00:12:02.000
 off it

00:12:02.000 --> 00:12:02.320
 to it

00:12:02.320 --> 00:12:03.019
 for it is

00:12:03.019 --> 00:12:03.460
 a crown

00:12:03.460 --> 00:12:04.159
 of thorns.

00:12:07.060 --> 00:12:07.560
 And that is why

00:12:07.560 --> 00:12:08.180
 when I spoke to the

00:12:08.180 --> 00:12:08.759
 children this morning

00:12:08.759 --> 00:12:09.500
 before the sermon

00:12:09.500 --> 00:12:10.620
 I said to them

00:12:10.620 --> 00:12:11.779
 marriage is

00:12:11.779 --> 00:12:13.800
 can someone

00:12:13.800 --> 00:12:14.200
 shout it out?

00:12:15.360 --> 00:12:15.779
 Death.

00:12:17.259 --> 00:12:17.700
 Death.

00:12:18.960 --> 00:12:19.399
 Marriage

00:12:19.399 --> 00:12:20.139
 is

00:12:20.139 --> 00:12:21.139
 death.

00:12:24.139 --> 00:12:24.779
 And that is how

00:12:24.779 --> 00:12:25.240
 we live

00:12:25.240 --> 00:12:26.259
 Christ's example

00:12:26.259 --> 00:12:27.919
 by dying.

00:12:29.779 --> 00:12:30.700
 And no marriage

00:12:30.700 --> 00:12:31.519
 which does not

00:12:31.519 --> 00:12:32.200
 have death

00:12:32.200 --> 00:12:33.639
 death of itself

00:12:33.639 --> 00:12:34.919
 of death of self

00:12:34.919 --> 00:12:35.399
 at its heart

00:12:35.399 --> 00:12:36.139
 will ever live long

00:12:36.139 --> 00:12:37.379
 or will ever thrive.

00:12:38.600 --> 00:12:39.340
 And no marriage

00:12:39.340 --> 00:12:39.860
 which does not

00:12:39.860 --> 00:12:40.399
 have the death

00:12:40.399 --> 00:12:40.779
 of the husband

00:12:40.779 --> 00:12:41.919
 as the dominating

00:12:41.919 --> 00:12:42.680
 feature of his head

00:12:42.680 --> 00:12:43.379
 will ever produce

00:12:43.379 --> 00:12:44.120
 a beautiful wife.

00:12:45.680 --> 00:12:46.180
 Now I want to

00:12:46.180 --> 00:12:47.000
 pause for a little bit

00:12:47.000 --> 00:12:47.720
 because I've done

00:12:47.720 --> 00:12:48.320
 quite a bit of

00:12:48.320 --> 00:12:49.060
 reading on this.

00:12:50.700 --> 00:12:51.440
 In preparation

00:12:51.440 --> 00:12:51.840
 for this

00:12:51.840 --> 00:12:52.600
 I came across

00:12:52.600 --> 00:12:53.560
 the best definition

00:12:53.560 --> 00:12:54.240
 for masculinity

00:12:54.240 --> 00:12:55.139
 I've ever seen.

00:12:56.039 --> 00:12:56.399
 And it goes

00:12:56.399 --> 00:12:56.779
 to the heart

00:12:56.779 --> 00:12:57.299
 of this issue.

00:12:58.159 --> 00:12:58.519
 Masculinity

00:12:58.519 --> 00:13:00.779
 is the glad

00:13:00.779 --> 00:13:01.460
 assumption

00:13:01.460 --> 00:13:03.700
 of sacrificial

00:13:03.700 --> 00:13:04.560
 responsibility.

00:13:07.560 --> 00:13:07.879
 Masculinity

00:13:07.879 --> 00:13:09.060
 is the glad

00:13:09.060 --> 00:13:09.620
 assumption

00:13:09.620 --> 00:13:12.019
 of sacrificial

00:13:12.019 --> 00:13:12.639
 responsibility.

00:13:12.840 --> 00:13:13.299
 Now the reason

00:13:13.299 --> 00:13:14.100
 I think that works

00:13:14.100 --> 00:13:14.600
 is because it

00:13:14.600 --> 00:13:15.840
 so closely fits

00:13:15.840 --> 00:13:16.240
 with what Paul

00:13:16.240 --> 00:13:16.759
 is saying here

00:13:16.759 --> 00:13:17.180
 doesn't it?

00:13:18.519 --> 00:13:19.200
 Remember Paul

00:13:19.200 --> 00:13:19.960
 is not saying

00:13:19.960 --> 00:13:22.299
 husbands be the

00:13:22.299 --> 00:13:22.639
 heads.

00:13:23.539 --> 00:13:23.899
 He's simply

00:13:23.899 --> 00:13:24.220
 saying you

00:13:24.220 --> 00:13:24.779
 are the head.

00:13:24.980 --> 00:13:25.279
 That's what you

00:13:25.279 --> 00:13:25.560
 are.

00:13:26.560 --> 00:13:27.379
 The only question

00:13:27.379 --> 00:13:27.840
 is what kind

00:13:27.840 --> 00:13:28.060
 of head

00:13:28.060 --> 00:13:28.340
 are you going

00:13:28.340 --> 00:13:28.680
 to be?

00:13:30.240 --> 00:13:30.800
 Are you going

00:13:30.800 --> 00:13:31.320
 to dominate

00:13:31.320 --> 00:13:31.779
 your home

00:13:31.779 --> 00:13:32.660
 by abdicating

00:13:32.660 --> 00:13:33.080
 from your

00:13:33.080 --> 00:13:33.560
 responsibility

00:13:33.560 --> 00:13:34.560
 or are you

00:13:34.560 --> 00:13:34.899
 going to

00:13:34.899 --> 00:13:35.620
 dominate your

00:13:35.620 --> 00:13:36.000
 home by

00:13:36.000 --> 00:13:37.279
 gladly assuming

00:13:37.279 --> 00:13:39.120
 your sacrificial

00:13:39.120 --> 00:13:40.000
 responsibility?

00:13:41.639 --> 00:13:42.080
 Here's the other

00:13:42.080 --> 00:13:42.600
 thing I learnt

00:13:42.600 --> 00:13:43.500
 alongside this

00:13:43.500 --> 00:13:44.040
 definition of

00:13:44.040 --> 00:13:44.379
 masculinity.

00:13:45.300 --> 00:13:45.779
 Authority

00:13:45.779 --> 00:13:47.800
 flows to

00:13:47.800 --> 00:13:48.160
 those who

00:13:48.160 --> 00:13:48.960
 take responsibility.

00:13:50.460 --> 00:13:51.560
 That is genius.

00:13:51.559 --> 00:13:53.819
 authority flows

00:13:53.819 --> 00:13:55.279
 to those who

00:13:55.279 --> 00:13:56.579
 take responsibility.

00:13:58.119 --> 00:13:58.500
 You see the

00:13:58.500 --> 00:13:59.179
 foundation of

00:13:59.179 --> 00:13:59.759
 Christ's

00:13:59.759 --> 00:14:00.419
 authority

00:14:00.419 --> 00:14:06.099
 in the church

00:14:06.099 --> 00:14:07.299
 is the blood

00:14:07.299 --> 00:14:08.039
 that he shed

00:14:08.039 --> 00:14:08.519
 isn't it?

00:14:09.959 --> 00:14:10.619
 He took

00:14:10.619 --> 00:14:11.399
 responsibility

00:14:11.399 --> 00:14:12.779
 through sacrificial

00:14:12.779 --> 00:14:14.419
 service and

00:14:14.419 --> 00:14:15.039
 therefore all

00:14:15.039 --> 00:14:15.759
 authority in

00:14:15.759 --> 00:14:16.079
 heaven and

00:14:16.079 --> 00:14:17.059
 earth has been

00:14:17.059 --> 00:14:17.519
 given to him

00:14:17.519 --> 00:14:18.199
 as flow to him.

00:14:18.200 --> 00:14:20.020
 Sacrificial

00:14:20.020 --> 00:14:20.680
 responsibility

00:14:20.680 --> 00:14:21.860
 creates authority.

00:14:21.960 --> 00:14:22.379
 Now you see

00:14:22.379 --> 00:14:23.140
 that in work.

00:14:24.700 --> 00:14:25.160
 Somebody who's

00:14:25.160 --> 00:14:25.500
 in a more

00:14:25.500 --> 00:14:26.140
 senior position

00:14:26.140 --> 00:14:27.759
 and you are

00:14:27.759 --> 00:14:28.200
 meant to

00:14:28.200 --> 00:14:28.780
 respect their

00:14:28.780 --> 00:14:29.440
 authority over

00:14:29.440 --> 00:14:30.100
 you but they

00:14:30.100 --> 00:14:31.120
 clearly take no

00:14:31.120 --> 00:14:32.660
 loving care over

00:14:32.660 --> 00:14:33.000
 you.

00:14:33.660 --> 00:14:34.200
 There's no

00:14:34.200 --> 00:14:34.960
 sacrificial

00:14:34.960 --> 00:14:36.020
 responsibility for

00:14:36.020 --> 00:14:36.100
 you.

00:14:36.320 --> 00:14:36.800
 How do you

00:14:36.800 --> 00:14:37.320
 feel about your

00:14:37.320 --> 00:14:37.960
 boss when they're

00:14:37.960 --> 00:14:38.379
 like that?

00:14:38.860 --> 00:14:39.180
 How do you

00:14:39.180 --> 00:14:39.460
 feel about

00:14:39.460 --> 00:14:39.960
 submitting to

00:14:39.960 --> 00:14:40.420
 someone like

00:14:40.420 --> 00:14:40.660
 that?

00:14:40.879 --> 00:14:41.580
 I'm in charge

00:14:41.580 --> 00:14:41.940
 but I'm not

00:14:41.940 --> 00:14:42.460
 interested in

00:14:42.460 --> 00:14:42.700
 you.

00:14:43.520 --> 00:14:43.940
 And I'm not

00:14:43.940 --> 00:14:44.440
 interested in

00:14:44.440 --> 00:14:44.840
 serving you.

00:14:45.040 --> 00:14:45.620
 I'm the boss

00:14:45.620 --> 00:14:46.140
 you do what I

00:14:46.140 --> 00:14:46.520
 say.

00:14:48.200 --> 00:14:49.140
 So there's no

00:14:49.140 --> 00:14:50.680
 responsibility for

00:14:50.680 --> 00:14:51.379
 you or modeled

00:14:51.379 --> 00:14:52.040
 to you or given

00:14:52.040 --> 00:14:52.500
 to you.

00:14:53.520 --> 00:14:54.140
 It's the kind of

00:14:54.140 --> 00:14:54.840
 authorities that we

00:14:54.840 --> 00:14:55.360
 all resent.

00:14:55.480 --> 00:14:56.040
 None of us like

00:14:56.040 --> 00:14:56.800
 bosses like that.

00:14:57.660 --> 00:14:58.640
 We hate it.

00:14:59.320 --> 00:15:00.280
 And it is a

00:15:00.280 --> 00:15:02.759
 million miles from

00:15:02.759 --> 00:15:04.140
 the authority of

00:15:04.140 --> 00:15:05.900
 God that he has

00:15:05.900 --> 00:15:06.460
 over his people.

00:15:07.300 --> 00:15:07.800
 The kind of

00:15:07.800 --> 00:15:08.560
 authority that

00:15:08.560 --> 00:15:09.400
 Christ has over

00:15:09.400 --> 00:15:09.960
 his bride.

00:15:10.320 --> 00:15:10.860
 And Paul says

00:15:10.860 --> 00:15:11.640
 that is a million

00:15:11.640 --> 00:15:12.480
 miles away from

00:15:12.480 --> 00:15:13.060
 the kind of

00:15:13.060 --> 00:15:14.820
 authority a

00:15:14.820 --> 00:15:15.560
 husband's head

00:15:15.560 --> 00:15:16.320
 should carry in

00:15:16.320 --> 00:15:16.680
 the home.

00:15:18.200 --> 00:15:19.240
 Here's what he's

00:15:19.240 --> 00:15:19.620
 saying.

00:15:20.620 --> 00:15:21.560
 When a man

00:15:21.560 --> 00:15:22.680
 becomes a

00:15:22.680 --> 00:15:23.700
 husband he is

00:15:23.700 --> 00:15:24.340
 shouldering the

00:15:24.340 --> 00:15:25.759
 responsibility of

00:15:25.759 --> 00:15:27.160
 being masculine in

00:15:27.160 --> 00:15:27.840
 that setting.

00:15:28.259 --> 00:15:28.720
 And so he's

00:15:28.720 --> 00:15:29.820
 called to bleed for

00:15:29.820 --> 00:15:30.280
 others.

00:15:32.100 --> 00:15:33.040
 It's very very

00:15:33.040 --> 00:15:33.820
 sobering isn't it

00:15:33.820 --> 00:15:34.140
 biblical

00:15:34.140 --> 00:15:34.720
 masculinity.

00:15:38.040 --> 00:15:39.060
 It's very

00:15:39.060 --> 00:15:39.800
 sobering.

00:15:40.280 --> 00:15:41.220
 It is heavy.

00:15:42.600 --> 00:15:43.060
 And biblical

00:15:43.060 --> 00:15:43.900
 masculinity can

00:15:43.900 --> 00:15:44.980
 only be carried

00:15:44.980 --> 00:15:46.720
 by the miracle of

00:15:46.720 --> 00:15:47.440
 a changed heart.

00:15:48.200 --> 00:15:49.879
 And a

00:15:49.879 --> 00:15:50.440
 willingness to

00:15:50.440 --> 00:15:51.720
 die to myself

00:15:51.720 --> 00:15:52.660
 and my dreams

00:15:52.660 --> 00:15:53.120
 and my

00:15:53.120 --> 00:15:54.060
 preferences and

00:15:54.060 --> 00:15:55.100
 my tiredness

00:15:55.100 --> 00:15:56.900
 and my goals

00:15:56.900 --> 00:15:57.680
 and my ambitions

00:15:57.680 --> 00:15:58.560
 and my hobbies

00:15:58.560 --> 00:15:59.560
 and my perfect

00:15:59.560 --> 00:16:00.480
 neat and tidy

00:16:00.480 --> 00:16:01.200
 worlds.

00:16:02.240 --> 00:16:02.860
 That I'm

00:16:02.860 --> 00:16:03.620
 willing to die

00:16:03.620 --> 00:16:04.379
 to it for

00:16:04.379 --> 00:16:04.940
 you.

00:16:07.120 --> 00:16:07.660
 And that is

00:16:07.660 --> 00:16:08.000
 what it means

00:16:08.000 --> 00:16:08.920
 to be a

00:16:08.920 --> 00:16:09.400
 married man.

00:16:11.440 --> 00:16:12.020
 That's what it

00:16:12.020 --> 00:16:12.400
 means to be a

00:16:12.400 --> 00:16:12.840
 husband.

00:16:13.780 --> 00:16:14.620
 And a head.

00:16:14.620 --> 00:16:17.039
 If she had

00:16:17.039 --> 00:16:18.960
 to, can

00:16:18.960 --> 00:16:19.679
 your wife

00:16:19.679 --> 00:16:20.360
 point to the

00:16:20.360 --> 00:16:20.860
 blood on the

00:16:20.860 --> 00:16:21.220
 walls?

00:16:23.139 --> 00:16:23.919
 If she had

00:16:23.919 --> 00:16:24.240
 to, could

00:16:24.240 --> 00:16:24.639
 your wife

00:16:24.639 --> 00:16:25.139
 point to the

00:16:25.139 --> 00:16:25.500
 blood on the

00:16:25.500 --> 00:16:25.740
 floor?

00:16:27.480 --> 00:16:28.240
 Can you show

00:16:28.240 --> 00:16:29.039
 her the point

00:16:29.039 --> 00:16:29.879
 where she

00:16:29.879 --> 00:16:31.200
 knows your

00:16:31.200 --> 00:16:32.000
 love for her

00:16:32.000 --> 00:16:32.919
 cost you

00:16:32.919 --> 00:16:34.679
 and led to

00:16:34.679 --> 00:16:35.179
 your own life

00:16:35.179 --> 00:16:36.279
 ebbing away

00:16:36.279 --> 00:16:37.100
 so that she

00:16:37.100 --> 00:16:38.159
 grew and

00:16:38.159 --> 00:16:38.879
 flourished?

00:16:38.879 --> 00:16:41.960
 Because this

00:16:41.960 --> 00:16:42.840
 is point two.

00:16:43.080 --> 00:16:43.439
 The whole

00:16:43.439 --> 00:16:45.100
 point of

00:16:45.100 --> 00:16:45.720
 your love

00:16:45.720 --> 00:16:46.360
 husbands for

00:16:46.360 --> 00:16:46.919
 your wife is

00:16:46.919 --> 00:16:47.360
 to bestow

00:16:47.360 --> 00:16:47.919
 loveliness.

00:16:49.439 --> 00:16:50.000
 The whole

00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:50.559
 point of your

00:16:50.559 --> 00:16:51.080
 love for your

00:16:51.080 --> 00:16:51.500
 wife is to

00:16:51.500 --> 00:16:52.360
 bestow loveliness

00:16:52.360 --> 00:16:53.439
 on her, to

00:16:53.439 --> 00:16:53.960
 her, for

00:16:53.960 --> 00:16:54.159
 her.

00:16:54.419 --> 00:16:55.059
 See here is

00:16:55.059 --> 00:16:55.600
 what Paul is

00:16:55.600 --> 00:16:55.919
 saying to

00:16:55.919 --> 00:16:56.299
 husbands.

00:16:56.639 --> 00:16:57.100
 Husbands who

00:16:57.100 --> 00:16:58.960
 are sacrificially

00:16:58.960 --> 00:16:59.600
 responsible.

00:17:00.419 --> 00:17:00.960
 Pairs love

00:17:00.960 --> 00:17:01.320
 their wives

00:17:01.320 --> 00:17:01.659
 and they love

00:17:01.659 --> 00:17:02.019
 them in two

00:17:02.019 --> 00:17:02.240
 ways.

00:17:02.320 --> 00:17:02.480
 Look at

00:17:02.480 --> 00:17:03.039
 verse 25.

00:17:03.440 --> 00:17:03.779
 They love

00:17:03.779 --> 00:17:04.039
 them as

00:17:04.039 --> 00:17:04.420
 Christ loved

00:17:04.420 --> 00:17:04.880
 the church.

00:17:05.700 --> 00:17:06.119
 So to the

00:17:06.119 --> 00:17:06.380
 point of

00:17:06.380 --> 00:17:06.680
 death.

00:17:07.579 --> 00:17:07.839
 And verse

00:17:07.839 --> 00:17:08.319
 28.

00:17:08.880 --> 00:17:10.880
 They love

00:17:10.880 --> 00:17:11.240
 their wives

00:17:11.240 --> 00:17:11.480
 as they

00:17:11.480 --> 00:17:11.740
 love their

00:17:11.740 --> 00:17:12.240
 own bodies.

00:17:12.820 --> 00:17:13.300
 To the

00:17:13.300 --> 00:17:13.560
 point of

00:17:13.560 --> 00:17:14.260
 maximum care.

00:17:15.960 --> 00:17:16.360
 So two

00:17:16.360 --> 00:17:16.920
 examples for

00:17:16.920 --> 00:17:17.100
 you to

00:17:17.100 --> 00:17:17.340
 copy.

00:17:18.480 --> 00:17:19.220
 Christ's love

00:17:19.220 --> 00:17:19.920
 for you

00:17:19.920 --> 00:17:20.420
 men.

00:17:21.760 --> 00:17:22.360
 And copy

00:17:22.360 --> 00:17:22.680
 your own

00:17:22.680 --> 00:17:22.980
 love for

00:17:22.980 --> 00:17:23.220
 your own

00:17:23.220 --> 00:17:23.500
 body.

00:17:25.280 --> 00:17:25.800
 This is

00:17:25.800 --> 00:17:26.420
 very corny

00:17:26.420 --> 00:17:27.000
 but it

00:17:27.000 --> 00:17:27.360
 might help

00:17:27.360 --> 00:17:27.540
 you to

00:17:27.540 --> 00:17:27.920
 understand

00:17:27.920 --> 00:17:28.100
 it.

00:17:28.200 --> 00:17:28.560
 Husbands

00:17:28.560 --> 00:17:29.220
 are both

00:17:29.220 --> 00:17:29.720
 to be a

00:17:29.720 --> 00:17:30.840
 beautician

00:17:30.840 --> 00:17:31.800
 and a

00:17:31.800 --> 00:17:32.480
 dietician.

00:17:34.360 --> 00:17:34.800
 Husbands

00:17:34.800 --> 00:17:35.140
 are to be

00:17:35.140 --> 00:17:35.460
 both a

00:17:35.460 --> 00:17:35.880
 beautician

00:17:35.880 --> 00:17:36.260
 and a

00:17:36.260 --> 00:17:36.760
 dietician.

00:17:37.020 --> 00:17:37.440
 Your role

00:17:37.440 --> 00:17:37.680
 is to

00:17:37.680 --> 00:17:37.960
 make you

00:17:37.960 --> 00:17:38.360
 beautiful

00:17:38.359 --> 00:17:39.019
 and keep

00:17:39.019 --> 00:17:39.119
 her

00:17:39.119 --> 00:17:39.459
 healthy.

00:17:41.159 --> 00:17:41.639
 So look

00:17:41.639 --> 00:17:42.039
 what Christ

00:17:42.039 --> 00:17:42.279
 did to

00:17:42.279 --> 00:17:42.539
 make her

00:17:42.539 --> 00:17:42.819
 bright,

00:17:42.899 --> 00:17:43.099
 beautiful.

00:17:43.199 --> 00:17:43.379
 Look at

00:17:43.379 --> 00:17:44.000
 verse 25.

00:17:45.259 --> 00:17:45.559
 Husbands

00:17:45.559 --> 00:17:45.899
 love your

00:17:45.899 --> 00:17:46.319
 wives as

00:17:46.319 --> 00:17:46.719
 Christ loved

00:17:46.719 --> 00:17:47.019
 the church

00:17:47.019 --> 00:17:47.319
 and gave

00:17:47.319 --> 00:17:47.799
 himself up

00:17:47.799 --> 00:17:48.119
 for her.

00:17:50.079 --> 00:17:50.399
 That he

00:17:50.399 --> 00:17:50.579
 might

00:17:50.579 --> 00:17:51.240
 sanctify her,

00:17:51.240 --> 00:17:51.479
 he might

00:17:51.479 --> 00:17:51.799
 set her

00:17:51.799 --> 00:17:52.179
 apart,

00:17:52.279 --> 00:17:52.559
 have him

00:17:52.559 --> 00:17:53.339
 cleansed her

00:17:53.339 --> 00:17:53.599
 by the

00:17:53.599 --> 00:17:54.039
 washing of

00:17:54.039 --> 00:17:54.319
 water,

00:17:55.059 --> 00:17:55.459
 with the

00:17:55.459 --> 00:17:55.719
 word,

00:17:55.799 --> 00:17:56.099
 so that he

00:17:56.099 --> 00:17:56.579
 might present

00:17:56.579 --> 00:17:57.000
 the church

00:17:57.000 --> 00:17:58.000
 to himself

00:17:58.000 --> 00:17:58.719
 in splendour,

00:17:58.779 --> 00:17:59.319
 without spot

00:17:59.319 --> 00:17:59.659
 or wrinkle,

00:17:59.659 --> 00:17:59.979
 or any

00:17:59.979 --> 00:18:00.379
 such thing,

00:18:00.419 --> 00:18:00.639
 that she

00:18:00.639 --> 00:18:00.939
 might be

00:18:00.939 --> 00:18:01.240
 holy and

00:18:01.240 --> 00:18:01.439
 without

00:18:01.439 --> 00:18:01.839
 blemish.

00:18:03.719 --> 00:18:04.099
 It's a

00:18:04.099 --> 00:18:04.619
 way of saying

00:18:04.619 --> 00:18:05.639
 right now we

00:18:05.639 --> 00:18:06.059
 are in the

00:18:06.059 --> 00:18:06.979
 engagement stage of

00:18:06.980 --> 00:18:07.539
 our marriage to

00:18:07.539 --> 00:18:07.819
 Christ,

00:18:07.900 --> 00:18:08.240
 aren't we?

00:18:09.819 --> 00:18:10.160
 And he

00:18:10.160 --> 00:18:10.759
 died for us

00:18:10.759 --> 00:18:11.099
 in order that

00:18:11.099 --> 00:18:11.360
 he might

00:18:11.360 --> 00:18:11.720
 wash us

00:18:11.720 --> 00:18:12.039
 clean,

00:18:13.099 --> 00:18:13.339
 and he

00:18:13.339 --> 00:18:13.860
 might perfect

00:18:13.860 --> 00:18:14.220
 us in

00:18:14.220 --> 00:18:15.039
 sinless beauty

00:18:15.039 --> 00:18:15.460
 on our

00:18:15.460 --> 00:18:15.880
 wedding day,

00:18:16.019 --> 00:18:16.500
 and at the

00:18:16.500 --> 00:18:16.980
 end of the

00:18:16.980 --> 00:18:17.440
 day when we

00:18:17.440 --> 00:18:18.099
 stand there

00:18:18.099 --> 00:18:18.799
 before him,

00:18:19.799 --> 00:18:20.120
 he'll be

00:18:20.120 --> 00:18:20.680
 radiant,

00:18:21.819 --> 00:18:22.819
 nothing dirty,

00:18:23.140 --> 00:18:23.759
 nothing broken,

00:18:24.079 --> 00:18:24.460
 the law be

00:18:24.460 --> 00:18:24.839
 gone and

00:18:24.839 --> 00:18:25.140
 finished,

00:18:25.279 --> 00:18:25.940
 Christ died to

00:18:25.940 --> 00:18:26.200
 make us

00:18:26.200 --> 00:18:26.599
 beautiful,

00:18:27.000 --> 00:18:27.460
 and husbands

00:18:27.460 --> 00:18:28.039
 died to make

00:18:28.039 --> 00:18:28.440
 their wives

00:18:28.440 --> 00:18:28.839
 beautiful.

00:18:28.839 --> 00:18:31.559
 And I

00:18:31.559 --> 00:18:31.859
 think it

00:18:31.859 --> 00:18:32.439
 is the

00:18:32.439 --> 00:18:32.980
 idea,

00:18:33.099 --> 00:18:33.439
 isn't it,

00:18:33.459 --> 00:18:33.699
 in the

00:18:33.699 --> 00:18:34.059
 passage,

00:18:34.220 --> 00:18:34.720
 of the

00:18:34.720 --> 00:18:36.259
 husband taking

00:18:36.259 --> 00:18:36.899
 on himself

00:18:36.899 --> 00:18:37.939
 the goal of

00:18:37.939 --> 00:18:38.659
 leading his

00:18:38.659 --> 00:18:39.299
 wife into

00:18:39.299 --> 00:18:41.439
 growth and

00:18:41.439 --> 00:18:42.399
 wholeness,

00:18:43.319 --> 00:18:44.740
 personally and

00:18:44.740 --> 00:18:45.199
 spiritually.

00:18:45.319 --> 00:18:45.559
 So she

00:18:45.559 --> 00:18:46.279
 develops.

00:18:48.500 --> 00:18:49.079
 So the

00:18:49.079 --> 00:18:49.539
 goal of your

00:18:49.539 --> 00:18:50.039
 marriage is not

00:18:50.039 --> 00:18:50.359
 your own

00:18:50.359 --> 00:18:50.980
 self fulfillment,

00:18:51.980 --> 00:18:53.199
 but her

00:18:53.199 --> 00:18:53.799
 blossoming.

00:18:55.519 --> 00:18:55.839
 And I

00:18:55.839 --> 00:18:56.079
 think we

00:18:56.079 --> 00:18:56.399
 want to know

00:18:56.399 --> 00:18:56.899
 exactly what

00:18:56.899 --> 00:18:57.299
 that means.

00:18:57.399 --> 00:18:57.519
 Okay,

00:18:57.579 --> 00:18:57.879
 very well,

00:18:57.919 --> 00:18:58.240
 what do I

00:18:58.240 --> 00:18:58.699
 have to do?

00:18:58.700 --> 00:18:59.080
 What do I

00:18:59.080 --> 00:18:59.700
 have to do?

00:19:00.940 --> 00:19:01.380
 But that's

00:19:01.380 --> 00:19:01.680
 going to look

00:19:01.680 --> 00:19:01.980
 different,

00:19:02.039 --> 00:19:02.420
 isn't it?

00:19:03.420 --> 00:19:03.779
 It's going to

00:19:03.779 --> 00:19:04.380
 look different

00:19:04.380 --> 00:19:05.019
 in different

00:19:05.019 --> 00:19:05.640
 marriages.

00:19:07.360 --> 00:19:07.740
 I don't

00:19:07.740 --> 00:19:07.940
 think it's

00:19:07.940 --> 00:19:08.279
 particularly

00:19:08.279 --> 00:19:09.480
 helpful to

00:19:09.480 --> 00:19:09.920
 me to tell

00:19:09.920 --> 00:19:10.140
 you the

00:19:10.140 --> 00:19:10.759
 specifics.

00:19:11.900 --> 00:19:12.279
 I was at a

00:19:12.279 --> 00:19:12.559
 minister's

00:19:12.559 --> 00:19:13.019
 conference this

00:19:13.019 --> 00:19:13.319
 week and

00:19:13.319 --> 00:19:14.400
 the guy

00:19:14.400 --> 00:19:14.720
 said,

00:19:14.779 --> 00:19:15.340
 he sings

00:19:15.340 --> 00:19:15.620
 to his

00:19:15.620 --> 00:19:16.200
 wife while

00:19:16.200 --> 00:19:16.440
 making

00:19:16.440 --> 00:19:16.860
 breakfast

00:19:16.860 --> 00:19:17.200
 every morning,

00:19:17.240 --> 00:19:17.559
 he makes

00:19:17.559 --> 00:19:18.140
 up songs.

00:19:19.480 --> 00:19:20.019
 And husbands

00:19:20.019 --> 00:19:20.440
 need to have

00:19:20.440 --> 00:19:20.960
 nicknames for

00:19:20.960 --> 00:19:21.240
 their work,

00:19:21.279 --> 00:19:21.519
 I can't

00:19:21.519 --> 00:19:21.740
 think of

00:19:21.740 --> 00:19:22.319
 anything worse.

00:19:23.240 --> 00:19:23.559
 It wouldn't

00:19:23.559 --> 00:19:24.000
 do any good

00:19:24.000 --> 00:19:24.240
 to my

00:19:24.240 --> 00:19:24.700
 marriage through

00:19:24.700 --> 00:19:24.980
 that.

00:19:27.299 --> 00:19:27.799
 So the

00:19:27.799 --> 00:19:28.220
 things that

00:19:28.220 --> 00:19:28.759
 specifically

00:19:28.759 --> 00:19:29.319
 apply to

00:19:29.319 --> 00:19:29.880
 me,

00:19:30.880 --> 00:19:31.319
 they don't

00:19:31.319 --> 00:19:31.680
 apply in

00:19:31.680 --> 00:19:31.860
 your

00:19:31.860 --> 00:19:32.400
 marriage.

00:19:33.620 --> 00:19:34.160
 But notice

00:19:34.160 --> 00:19:34.460
 some of the

00:19:34.460 --> 00:19:35.079
 general principles,

00:19:35.220 --> 00:19:35.400
 okay?

00:19:35.539 --> 00:19:36.059
 This love is

00:19:36.059 --> 00:19:37.680
 particular and

00:19:37.680 --> 00:19:38.220
 it's exclusive.

00:19:38.440 --> 00:19:38.660
 Do you see

00:19:38.660 --> 00:19:38.880
 that?

00:19:39.420 --> 00:19:40.220
 Christ loved

00:19:40.220 --> 00:19:40.759
 the church

00:19:40.759 --> 00:19:43.100
 and he gave

00:19:43.100 --> 00:19:43.700
 himself up for

00:19:43.700 --> 00:19:43.860
 her.

00:19:44.900 --> 00:19:45.920
 One bride for

00:19:45.920 --> 00:19:46.120
 him,

00:19:46.819 --> 00:19:47.779
 one woman for

00:19:47.779 --> 00:19:48.240
 your husbands.

00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:48.680


00:19:48.680 --> 00:19:50.860
 I've come across men

00:19:50.860 --> 00:19:51.740
 and particularly preachers

00:19:51.740 --> 00:19:53.620
 who seem to be fantastic experts

00:19:53.620 --> 00:19:54.640
 in women generally

00:19:54.640 --> 00:19:55.259
 have you met them?

00:19:56.000 --> 00:19:56.779
 women do this

00:19:56.779 --> 00:19:58.259
 women do that

00:19:58.259 --> 00:20:00.720
 well praise the Lord

00:20:00.720 --> 00:20:02.420
 we're never called to be experts

00:20:02.420 --> 00:20:04.880
 in womankind generally

00:20:04.880 --> 00:20:05.299
 are we?

00:20:06.420 --> 00:20:07.120
 just one woman

00:20:07.120 --> 00:20:08.160
 in particular

00:20:08.160 --> 00:20:10.380
 if your husband

00:20:10.380 --> 00:20:11.100
 it's just one woman

00:20:11.100 --> 00:20:12.060
 it's a particular love

00:20:12.060 --> 00:20:13.240
 but it's an initiating love

00:20:13.240 --> 00:20:13.779
 do you see that?

00:20:13.880 --> 00:20:14.360
 verse 25

00:20:14.360 --> 00:20:15.640
 Christ loved the church

00:20:15.640 --> 00:20:16.840
 and gave himself up for her

00:20:16.839 --> 00:20:19.399
 the presence of that word

00:20:19.399 --> 00:20:20.319
 himself

00:20:20.319 --> 00:20:22.480
 is significant

00:20:22.480 --> 00:20:24.099
 it was his own initiative

00:20:24.099 --> 00:20:27.639
 father didn't kick Jesus out of heaven

00:20:27.639 --> 00:20:30.199
 it was Jesus' own initiative

00:20:30.199 --> 00:20:31.699
 no one told him he had to do it

00:20:31.699 --> 00:20:32.839
 it is unconditional love

00:20:32.839 --> 00:20:34.959
 Christ takes a bride of ungliness

00:20:34.959 --> 00:20:36.039
 and he transforms her

00:20:36.039 --> 00:20:36.899
 into something beautiful

00:20:36.899 --> 00:20:38.019
 that is the picture

00:20:38.019 --> 00:20:38.299
 isn't it?

00:20:38.359 --> 00:20:39.019
 verse 27

00:20:39.019 --> 00:20:41.879
 the idea is that the bride

00:20:41.879 --> 00:20:43.059
 the church had those things

00:20:43.059 --> 00:20:44.119
 that we see the stains

00:20:44.119 --> 00:20:44.639
 on the church

00:20:44.639 --> 00:20:45.119
 and the wrinkles

00:20:45.119 --> 00:20:45.819
 and the blemishes

00:20:45.819 --> 00:20:47.259
 and Christ took them away

00:20:47.259 --> 00:20:48.639
 she had those things

00:20:48.639 --> 00:20:51.119
 until he took responsibility for it

00:20:51.119 --> 00:20:52.359
 and he began to erase them

00:20:52.359 --> 00:20:53.500
 it's a purposeful love

00:20:53.500 --> 00:20:54.500
 it's a particular love

00:20:54.500 --> 00:20:55.700
 it's an initiating love

00:20:55.700 --> 00:20:57.119
 it's an unconditional love

00:20:57.119 --> 00:20:58.960
 now you husbands decide

00:20:58.960 --> 00:21:00.139
 what it will mean

00:21:00.139 --> 00:21:02.980
 to love with that example

00:21:02.980 --> 00:21:03.859
 it will mean something

00:21:03.859 --> 00:21:04.339
 won't it?

00:21:05.779 --> 00:21:08.359
 it will take concrete form

00:21:08.359 --> 00:21:13.220
 possibly something that you are not doing already

00:21:13.220 --> 00:21:14.279
 but notice too

00:21:14.279 --> 00:21:14.880
 verse 28

00:21:14.880 --> 00:21:16.240
 the husband is a dietician

00:21:16.240 --> 00:21:16.980
 look at verse 28

00:21:16.980 --> 00:21:18.519
 in the same way

00:21:18.519 --> 00:21:19.700
 husbands should love their wives

00:21:19.700 --> 00:21:20.400
 as their own bodies

00:21:20.400 --> 00:21:21.319
 he who loves his wife

00:21:21.319 --> 00:21:21.900
 loves himself

00:21:21.900 --> 00:21:25.880
 for no one ever

00:21:25.880 --> 00:21:26.660
 hates his own flesh

00:21:26.660 --> 00:21:28.120
 but nourishes and cherishes

00:21:28.120 --> 00:21:29.779
 just as Christ does the church

00:21:29.779 --> 00:21:32.079
 nourishing

00:21:32.079 --> 00:21:35.019
 and tenderly caring

00:21:35.019 --> 00:21:37.339
 as he cherishes

00:21:37.339 --> 00:21:38.200
 his own body

00:21:38.200 --> 00:21:39.059
 nourishing and cherishing

00:21:39.059 --> 00:21:40.000
 it's a brilliant picture

00:21:40.000 --> 00:21:41.039
 isn't it?

00:21:41.039 --> 00:21:42.220
 what it's saying

00:21:42.220 --> 00:21:43.859
 is that Jesus cares for you

00:21:43.859 --> 00:21:45.759
 he cares for his body

00:21:45.759 --> 00:21:46.980
 he cares for the church

00:21:46.980 --> 00:21:48.059
 in that way

00:21:48.059 --> 00:21:48.619
 he nourishes

00:21:48.619 --> 00:21:50.480
 Jesus cherishes you

00:21:50.480 --> 00:21:53.079
 and so the husband

00:21:53.079 --> 00:21:54.079
 must show his wife

00:21:54.079 --> 00:21:56.220
 all the same love

00:21:56.220 --> 00:21:56.960
 and care

00:21:56.960 --> 00:21:58.879
 that he daily devotes

00:21:58.879 --> 00:21:59.700
 to his own body

00:21:59.700 --> 00:22:02.460
 let's think for a moment

00:22:02.460 --> 00:22:03.180
 let's have a slightly

00:22:03.180 --> 00:22:04.259
 strange scenario

00:22:04.259 --> 00:22:05.099
 let's imagine

00:22:05.099 --> 00:22:06.039
 that your body

00:22:06.039 --> 00:22:06.879
 Mr. Husband

00:22:06.879 --> 00:22:08.720
 could come up here

00:22:08.720 --> 00:22:09.500
 alright

00:22:09.500 --> 00:22:12.059
 I won't use one

00:22:12.059 --> 00:22:12.720
 here as an example

00:22:12.720 --> 00:22:14.400
 but let's have

00:22:14.400 --> 00:22:15.640
 generic husband Bob

00:22:15.640 --> 00:22:16.240
 I don't think we've got

00:22:16.240 --> 00:22:17.140
 a Bob in the church

00:22:17.140 --> 00:22:18.259
 I don't think we have

00:22:18.259 --> 00:22:18.839
 have we got a Bob

00:22:18.839 --> 00:22:20.960
 so let's imagine

00:22:20.960 --> 00:22:21.619
 Bob's body

00:22:21.619 --> 00:22:22.579
 Mr. Marry

00:22:22.579 --> 00:22:23.140
 if Bob's body

00:22:23.140 --> 00:22:23.619
 could come up here

00:22:23.619 --> 00:22:24.000
 and speak

00:22:24.000 --> 00:22:24.640
 it would say something

00:22:24.640 --> 00:22:25.000
 like this

00:22:25.000 --> 00:22:25.380
 wouldn't it?

00:22:26.440 --> 00:22:27.440
 his body would say

00:22:27.440 --> 00:22:28.240
 Bob is fantastic

00:22:28.240 --> 00:22:29.059
 he is wonderful

00:22:29.059 --> 00:22:31.039
 he always thinks

00:22:31.039 --> 00:22:31.660
 of my needs

00:22:31.660 --> 00:22:33.940
 and when I'm hungry

00:22:33.940 --> 00:22:35.420
 Bob feeds me

00:22:35.420 --> 00:22:36.759
 when I'm not hungry

00:22:36.759 --> 00:22:37.920
 sometimes Bob feeds me

00:22:37.920 --> 00:22:39.519
 when I'm tired

00:22:39.519 --> 00:22:40.460
 he's so understanding

00:22:40.460 --> 00:22:41.279
 he puts me to bed

00:22:41.279 --> 00:22:42.220
 in fact he lets me

00:22:42.220 --> 00:22:42.660
 fall asleep

00:22:42.660 --> 00:22:43.580
 pretty much anywhere

00:22:43.580 --> 00:22:46.360
 Bob puts designer

00:22:46.360 --> 00:22:47.019
 labels on me

00:22:47.019 --> 00:22:47.440
 every day

00:22:47.440 --> 00:22:48.380
 he combes my hair

00:22:48.380 --> 00:22:49.380
 he sheaves me

00:22:49.380 --> 00:22:51.360
 in fact he looks

00:22:51.360 --> 00:22:52.060
 at me every day

00:22:52.060 --> 00:22:52.440
 in the mirror

00:22:52.440 --> 00:22:52.980
 and tells me

00:22:52.980 --> 00:22:53.460
 I'm the best

00:22:53.460 --> 00:22:54.259
 body in the world

00:22:54.259 --> 00:22:57.380
 isn't it true

00:22:57.380 --> 00:22:58.140
 if your body

00:22:58.140 --> 00:22:59.080
 could speak

00:22:59.080 --> 00:22:59.900
 it would tell us

00:22:59.900 --> 00:23:01.320
 you are wonderful

00:23:01.320 --> 00:23:04.220
 you see husbands

00:23:04.220 --> 00:23:04.920
 imagine if we

00:23:04.920 --> 00:23:05.700
 swapped roles

00:23:05.700 --> 00:23:06.360
 and it's your wife

00:23:06.360 --> 00:23:07.120
 that comes up here

00:23:07.120 --> 00:23:08.900
 and she tells the world

00:23:08.900 --> 00:23:09.600
 what she thinks

00:23:09.600 --> 00:23:11.480
 of her husband

00:23:11.480 --> 00:23:12.059
 what would a wife

00:23:12.059 --> 00:23:12.620
 say about you?

00:23:14.059 --> 00:23:14.819
 your wife

00:23:14.819 --> 00:23:17.059
 if she was honest

00:23:17.059 --> 00:23:18.000
 we know what a new bride

00:23:18.000 --> 00:23:18.980
 would say on her wedding day

00:23:18.980 --> 00:23:19.380
 don't we?

00:23:20.480 --> 00:23:21.080
 but what about

00:23:21.080 --> 00:23:22.120
 what would the wife

00:23:22.120 --> 00:23:22.860
 say in 5 years

00:23:22.860 --> 00:23:23.580
 15 years

00:23:23.580 --> 00:23:24.140
 30 years

00:23:24.140 --> 00:23:24.720
 50 years

00:23:24.720 --> 00:23:25.640
 and I think the challenge

00:23:25.640 --> 00:23:26.460
 of this passage

00:23:26.460 --> 00:23:28.080
 to husbands

00:23:28.080 --> 00:23:29.140
 is what will your wife

00:23:29.140 --> 00:23:29.940
 say about you

00:23:29.940 --> 00:23:30.640
 what your wife

00:23:30.640 --> 00:23:31.360
 will say about you

00:23:31.360 --> 00:23:31.960
 depends on how

00:23:31.960 --> 00:23:32.600
 you love her

00:23:32.599 --> 00:23:34.899
 so we know

00:23:34.899 --> 00:23:35.919
 how the caricature

00:23:35.919 --> 00:23:36.899
 of Mrs. Married

00:23:36.899 --> 00:23:38.319
 turns out

00:23:38.319 --> 00:23:39.619
 there's Mrs. Married

00:23:39.619 --> 00:23:40.059
 in the office

00:23:40.059 --> 00:23:40.699
 with her colleagues

00:23:40.699 --> 00:23:41.799
 she's at the school gates

00:23:41.799 --> 00:23:43.599
 with the children

00:23:43.599 --> 00:23:44.699
 and she's complaining

00:23:44.699 --> 00:23:45.419
 about her husband

00:23:45.419 --> 00:23:47.099
 he's hopeless

00:23:47.099 --> 00:23:47.719
 with the kids

00:23:47.719 --> 00:23:48.759
 you know what he's like

00:23:48.759 --> 00:23:50.419
 he doesn't know

00:23:50.419 --> 00:23:50.759
 what they're doing

00:23:50.759 --> 00:23:51.619
 from one day to the next

00:23:51.619 --> 00:23:52.319
 he never does anything

00:23:52.319 --> 00:23:52.879
 around the house

00:23:52.879 --> 00:23:53.439
 he's always late

00:23:53.439 --> 00:23:53.959
 home from work

00:23:53.959 --> 00:23:55.039
 he never surprises me

00:23:55.039 --> 00:23:55.500
 anymore

00:23:55.500 --> 00:23:56.599
 I know what's coming

00:23:56.599 --> 00:23:57.359
 all the time

00:23:57.359 --> 00:23:57.879
 our bodies

00:23:57.879 --> 00:23:58.859
 would never say that

00:23:58.859 --> 00:24:01.799
 our bodies

00:24:01.799 --> 00:24:02.379
 would never say that

00:24:02.379 --> 00:24:03.000
 about ourselves

00:24:03.000 --> 00:24:04.359
 imagine instead

00:24:04.359 --> 00:24:05.139
 a wife who's full

00:24:05.139 --> 00:24:05.859
 of respect

00:24:05.859 --> 00:24:06.979
 and support for you

00:24:06.979 --> 00:24:09.099
 imagine a wife

00:24:09.099 --> 00:24:09.879
 who tells everybody

00:24:09.879 --> 00:24:10.740
 how glad she is

00:24:10.740 --> 00:24:11.599
 to be married to you

00:24:11.599 --> 00:24:12.740
 because of how

00:24:12.740 --> 00:24:13.500
 you love her

00:24:13.500 --> 00:24:16.000
 I think Paul says

00:24:16.000 --> 00:24:16.759
 if you want a wife

00:24:16.759 --> 00:24:17.500
 who says that

00:24:17.500 --> 00:24:18.119
 then husbands

00:24:18.119 --> 00:24:19.039
 you learn

00:24:19.039 --> 00:24:20.419
 at the foot of the cross

00:24:20.419 --> 00:24:22.740
 you learn

00:24:22.740 --> 00:24:23.439
 at the foot of the cross

00:24:23.439 --> 00:24:23.979
 that Christ

00:24:23.979 --> 00:24:25.079
 laid down his life

00:24:25.079 --> 00:24:25.259
 for you

00:24:25.259 --> 00:24:26.899
 not counting the cross

00:24:26.899 --> 00:24:28.099
 he laid down

00:24:28.099 --> 00:24:29.659
 you lay down

00:24:29.659 --> 00:24:30.079
 your life

00:24:30.079 --> 00:24:30.659
 for your wife

00:24:30.659 --> 00:24:31.679
 by nourishing her

00:24:31.679 --> 00:24:32.759
 and giving yourself

00:24:32.759 --> 00:24:33.559
 up for her

00:24:33.559 --> 00:24:35.859
 not counting the cross

00:24:35.859 --> 00:24:38.279
 ask her what it means

00:24:38.279 --> 00:24:39.119
 to nourish

00:24:39.119 --> 00:24:40.579
 and cherish her

00:24:40.579 --> 00:24:43.559
 I'm embarrassed about this

00:24:43.559 --> 00:24:44.439
 but I can't confess to you

00:24:44.439 --> 00:24:44.819
 that I had

00:24:44.819 --> 00:24:46.519
 I had to ask my wife

00:24:46.519 --> 00:24:47.259
 what does that mean

00:24:47.259 --> 00:24:48.159
 because I didn't know

00:24:48.159 --> 00:24:50.099
 what does it mean

00:24:50.099 --> 00:24:51.099
 to nourish

00:24:51.099 --> 00:24:52.779
 and cherish you

00:24:52.779 --> 00:24:53.779
 those words

00:24:53.779 --> 00:24:55.719
 to nourish and cherish

00:24:55.719 --> 00:24:56.500
 it may well be

00:24:56.500 --> 00:24:56.919
 that a husband

00:24:56.919 --> 00:24:57.339
 is sitting here

00:24:57.339 --> 00:24:57.579
 and somebody

00:24:57.579 --> 00:24:58.319
 and he hasn't got a clue

00:24:58.319 --> 00:24:59.240
 what that means

00:24:59.240 --> 00:25:01.119
 it's not standard

00:25:01.119 --> 00:25:02.159
 male vocabulary

00:25:02.159 --> 00:25:02.839
 is it

00:25:02.839 --> 00:25:04.379
 well ask her

00:25:04.379 --> 00:25:06.960
 ask what it means

00:25:06.960 --> 00:25:08.619
 well to wives

00:25:08.619 --> 00:25:09.339
 what does this passage

00:25:09.339 --> 00:25:09.859
 say to wives

00:25:09.859 --> 00:25:10.579
 from verse 22

00:25:10.579 --> 00:25:12.419
 wives submit to your

00:25:12.419 --> 00:25:13.039
 own husbands

00:25:13.039 --> 00:25:13.659
 and ask to the Lord

00:25:13.659 --> 00:25:14.379
 verse 33

00:25:14.379 --> 00:25:17.419
 however let each one of you

00:25:17.419 --> 00:25:18.019
 love his wife

00:25:18.019 --> 00:25:18.419
 as himself

00:25:18.419 --> 00:25:19.000
 and let the wife

00:25:19.000 --> 00:25:19.759
 see that she respects

00:25:19.759 --> 00:25:20.299
 her husband

00:25:20.299 --> 00:25:23.539
 it's really vital

00:25:23.539 --> 00:25:24.859
 that we don't let the world

00:25:24.859 --> 00:25:25.539
 mislead us

00:25:25.539 --> 00:25:26.379
 into what the word

00:25:26.380 --> 00:25:27.340
 submission means

00:25:27.340 --> 00:25:29.280
 so you can imagine

00:25:29.280 --> 00:25:30.020
 Cosmopolitan

00:25:30.020 --> 00:25:31.980
 runs an article

00:25:31.980 --> 00:25:33.080
 27 ways

00:25:33.080 --> 00:25:34.040
 to submit to your husband

00:25:34.040 --> 00:25:34.440
 number one

00:25:34.440 --> 00:25:35.660
 always do what he says

00:25:35.660 --> 00:25:36.960
 number two

00:25:36.960 --> 00:25:37.560
 never disagree

00:25:37.560 --> 00:25:38.280
 with his opinions

00:25:38.280 --> 00:25:38.860
 when he wants

00:25:38.860 --> 00:25:39.740
 your opinion

00:25:39.740 --> 00:25:40.920
 he'll give it to you

00:25:40.920 --> 00:25:42.160
 number three

00:25:42.160 --> 00:25:42.760
 always do the cooking

00:25:42.760 --> 00:25:43.220
 the cleaning

00:25:43.220 --> 00:25:44.100
 and have his dinner

00:25:44.100 --> 00:25:44.460
 on time

00:25:44.460 --> 00:25:45.520
 that is a gross

00:25:45.520 --> 00:25:46.220
 distortion

00:25:46.220 --> 00:25:49.760
 of what submission is

00:25:49.759 --> 00:25:52.359
 it's what people

00:25:52.359 --> 00:25:53.220
 understand when they

00:25:53.220 --> 00:25:53.559
 hear the word

00:25:53.559 --> 00:25:54.160
 but it's not what it

00:25:54.160 --> 00:25:54.660
 means

00:25:54.660 --> 00:25:57.480
 submission is a

00:25:57.480 --> 00:25:58.279
 Christian term

00:25:58.279 --> 00:25:58.819
 with a Christian

00:25:58.819 --> 00:25:59.140
 meaning

00:25:59.140 --> 00:25:59.740
 which is this

00:25:59.740 --> 00:26:01.539
 voluntary submission

00:26:01.539 --> 00:26:03.119
 to the will

00:26:03.119 --> 00:26:03.660
 of another

00:26:03.660 --> 00:26:05.879
 it is not

00:26:05.879 --> 00:26:06.759
 forced submission

00:26:06.759 --> 00:26:07.220
 to the will

00:26:07.220 --> 00:26:07.660
 of another

00:26:07.660 --> 00:26:09.779
 not when it's used

00:26:09.779 --> 00:26:10.299
 in the context

00:26:10.299 --> 00:26:10.960
 of marriage

00:26:10.960 --> 00:26:13.339
 both types of

00:26:13.339 --> 00:26:13.839
 submission

00:26:13.839 --> 00:26:16.220
 both forced

00:26:16.220 --> 00:26:16.619
 submission

00:26:16.619 --> 00:26:17.400
 and voluntary

00:26:17.400 --> 00:26:17.839
 submission

00:26:17.839 --> 00:26:18.640
 exist in the Bible

00:26:18.640 --> 00:26:19.560
 both of their

00:26:19.560 --> 00:26:20.060
 place

00:26:20.060 --> 00:26:22.120
 but voluntary

00:26:22.120 --> 00:26:22.840
 submission

00:26:22.840 --> 00:26:23.900
 is what the

00:26:23.900 --> 00:26:24.400
 wife's

00:26:24.400 --> 00:26:25.040
 is

00:26:25.040 --> 00:26:26.700
 it's not

00:26:26.700 --> 00:26:27.200
 a forced

00:26:27.200 --> 00:26:27.600
 kind of

00:26:27.600 --> 00:26:27.980
 submission

00:26:27.980 --> 00:26:29.340
 her submission

00:26:29.340 --> 00:26:30.640
 is exactly

00:26:30.640 --> 00:26:31.440
 like

00:26:31.440 --> 00:26:32.780
 Christ's own

00:26:32.780 --> 00:26:33.060
 kind of

00:26:33.060 --> 00:26:33.340
 submission

00:26:33.340 --> 00:26:34.220
 and Cathy Caller's

00:26:34.220 --> 00:26:34.759
 chapter in that

00:26:34.759 --> 00:26:35.320
 book on marriage

00:26:35.320 --> 00:26:35.680
 helped me

00:26:35.680 --> 00:26:36.180
 enormously

00:26:36.180 --> 00:26:37.040
 so come with me

00:26:37.040 --> 00:26:37.860
 to 1 Corinthians

00:26:37.860 --> 00:26:38.980
 chapter 15

00:26:38.980 --> 00:26:40.420
 1 Corinthians

00:26:40.420 --> 00:26:41.440
 chapter 15

00:26:41.440 --> 00:26:41.960
 and let me just

00:26:41.960 --> 00:26:42.460
 show you that

00:26:42.460 --> 00:26:42.700
 alright

00:26:42.700 --> 00:26:43.440
 1 Corinthians

00:26:43.440 --> 00:26:43.759
 15

00:26:43.759 --> 00:26:45.180
 come on

00:26:45.180 --> 00:26:46.960
 page 961

00:26:46.960 --> 00:26:49.039
 and let me

00:26:49.039 --> 00:26:49.319
 read you

00:26:49.319 --> 00:26:49.980
 verses 24

00:26:49.980 --> 00:26:50.460
 to 27

00:26:50.460 --> 00:26:50.860
 1 Corinthians

00:26:50.860 --> 00:26:51.319
 15

00:26:51.319 --> 00:26:52.380
 page 961

00:26:52.380 --> 00:26:54.740
 then comes

00:26:54.740 --> 00:26:55.259
 the end

00:26:55.259 --> 00:26:58.140
 when

00:26:58.140 --> 00:26:59.240
 Jesus

00:26:59.240 --> 00:26:59.940
 delivers the

00:26:59.940 --> 00:27:00.340
 kingdom of

00:27:00.340 --> 00:27:00.680
 God

00:27:00.680 --> 00:27:01.460
 the kingdom

00:27:01.460 --> 00:27:01.980
 to God

00:27:01.980 --> 00:27:02.340
 the Father

00:27:02.340 --> 00:27:03.000
 after destroying

00:27:03.000 --> 00:27:03.440
 every rule

00:27:03.440 --> 00:27:03.720
 and every

00:27:03.720 --> 00:27:04.059
 authority

00:27:04.059 --> 00:27:04.559
 in power

00:27:04.559 --> 00:27:06.799
 that's

00:27:06.799 --> 00:27:07.059
 forced

00:27:07.059 --> 00:27:07.460
 submission

00:27:07.460 --> 00:27:09.600
 for he

00:27:09.600 --> 00:27:10.180
 must reign

00:27:10.180 --> 00:27:10.519
 until he

00:27:10.519 --> 00:27:10.720
 has put

00:27:10.720 --> 00:27:11.180
 all his

00:27:11.180 --> 00:27:11.700
 enemies

00:27:11.700 --> 00:27:12.600
 under his

00:27:12.600 --> 00:27:13.440
 feet

00:27:13.440 --> 00:27:15.180
 forced

00:27:15.180 --> 00:27:15.480
 submission

00:27:15.480 --> 00:27:15.740
 again

00:27:15.740 --> 00:27:16.120
 the last

00:27:16.120 --> 00:27:16.339
 enemy

00:27:16.339 --> 00:27:16.559
 to be

00:27:16.559 --> 00:27:16.819
 destroyed

00:27:16.819 --> 00:27:16.980
 is

00:27:16.980 --> 00:27:17.240
 death

00:27:17.240 --> 00:27:17.880
 for God

00:27:17.880 --> 00:27:18.140
 has put

00:27:18.140 --> 00:27:18.660
 all things

00:27:18.660 --> 00:27:19.900
 in subjection

00:27:19.900 --> 00:27:20.400
 under his

00:27:20.400 --> 00:27:20.740
 feet

00:27:20.740 --> 00:27:22.160
 but when it

00:27:22.160 --> 00:27:22.519
 says all

00:27:22.519 --> 00:27:22.819
 things are

00:27:22.819 --> 00:27:23.019
 put in

00:27:23.019 --> 00:27:23.440
 subjection

00:27:23.440 --> 00:27:23.900
 it is plain

00:27:23.900 --> 00:27:24.220
 that he

00:27:24.220 --> 00:27:24.759
 is accepted

00:27:24.759 --> 00:27:25.099
 who put

00:27:25.099 --> 00:27:25.559
 all things

00:27:25.559 --> 00:27:26.140
 in subjection

00:27:26.140 --> 00:27:26.559
 under him

00:27:26.559 --> 00:27:27.940
 when all

00:27:27.940 --> 00:27:28.299
 things are

00:27:28.299 --> 00:27:28.759
 subjected

00:27:28.759 --> 00:27:29.039
 him

00:27:29.039 --> 00:27:29.680
 for submission

00:27:29.680 --> 00:27:30.319
 then the

00:27:30.319 --> 00:27:30.599
 Son of

00:27:30.599 --> 00:27:30.799
 Man

00:27:30.799 --> 00:27:31.339
 will also

00:27:31.339 --> 00:27:32.759
 be subjected

00:27:32.759 --> 00:27:34.460
 to him

00:27:34.460 --> 00:27:34.839
 who put

00:27:34.839 --> 00:27:35.440
 all things

00:27:35.440 --> 00:27:36.160
 in subjection

00:27:36.160 --> 00:27:36.539
 under him

00:27:36.539 --> 00:27:37.059
 that God

00:27:37.059 --> 00:27:37.380
 may be

00:27:37.380 --> 00:27:37.779
 all in all

00:27:37.779 --> 00:27:38.120
 now those

00:27:38.120 --> 00:27:38.500
 are difficult

00:27:38.500 --> 00:27:38.740
 places

00:27:38.740 --> 00:27:39.059
 I wish I

00:27:39.059 --> 00:27:39.299
 had more

00:27:39.299 --> 00:27:39.799
 time

00:27:39.799 --> 00:27:42.180
 but Paul

00:27:42.180 --> 00:27:42.420
 is saying

00:27:42.420 --> 00:27:42.680
 at the

00:27:42.680 --> 00:27:43.000
 end of

00:27:43.000 --> 00:27:43.420
 time

00:27:43.420 --> 00:27:44.840
 God

00:27:44.840 --> 00:27:44.980
 the

00:27:44.980 --> 00:27:45.160
 Father

00:27:45.160 --> 00:27:45.320
 will

00:27:45.320 --> 00:27:45.580
 make

00:27:45.580 --> 00:27:45.740
 the

00:27:45.740 --> 00:27:45.980
 world

00:27:45.980 --> 00:27:46.360
 submit

00:27:46.360 --> 00:27:46.640
 to

00:27:46.640 --> 00:27:47.019
 Christ

00:27:47.019 --> 00:27:47.460
 there

00:27:47.460 --> 00:27:47.560
 will

00:27:47.560 --> 00:27:47.660
 be

00:27:47.660 --> 00:27:47.800
 a

00:27:47.800 --> 00:27:48.080
 forced

00:27:48.080 --> 00:27:48.380
 submission

00:27:48.380 --> 00:27:48.720
 every

00:27:48.720 --> 00:27:48.980
 evil

00:27:48.980 --> 00:27:49.279
 vow

00:27:49.279 --> 00:27:49.600
 every

00:27:49.600 --> 00:27:49.840
 temple

00:27:49.840 --> 00:27:50.480
 confess

00:27:50.480 --> 00:27:51.440
 of all

00:27:51.440 --> 00:27:51.640
 things

00:27:51.640 --> 00:27:51.860
 at the

00:27:51.860 --> 00:27:52.060
 end

00:27:52.060 --> 00:27:52.900
 but then in

00:27:52.900 --> 00:27:53.400
 verse 28

00:27:53.400 --> 00:27:53.940
 when he's done

00:27:53.940 --> 00:27:54.340
 this

00:27:54.340 --> 00:27:55.940
 when he's done

00:27:55.940 --> 00:27:56.200
 this in

00:27:56.200 --> 00:27:56.700
 verse 28

00:27:56.700 --> 00:27:57.019
 when all

00:27:57.019 --> 00:27:57.300
 things are

00:27:57.300 --> 00:27:57.539
 subjected

00:27:57.539 --> 00:27:57.860
 to him

00:27:57.860 --> 00:27:58.220
 then the

00:27:58.220 --> 00:27:58.380
 Son

00:27:58.380 --> 00:27:58.740
 himself

00:27:58.740 --> 00:27:59.160
 will also

00:27:59.160 --> 00:27:59.400
 be

00:27:59.400 --> 00:27:59.860
 subjected

00:27:59.860 --> 00:28:00.560
 to him

00:28:00.560 --> 00:28:02.200
 and it

00:28:02.200 --> 00:28:03.019
 looks like

00:28:03.019 --> 00:28:03.700
 Christ

00:28:03.700 --> 00:28:04.120
 is being

00:28:04.120 --> 00:28:04.539
 made

00:28:04.539 --> 00:28:04.759
 to

00:28:04.759 --> 00:28:05.060
 submit

00:28:05.060 --> 00:28:05.300
 doesn't

00:28:05.300 --> 00:28:05.400
 it

00:28:05.400 --> 00:28:05.600
 that's

00:28:05.600 --> 00:28:05.820
 what it

00:28:05.820 --> 00:28:06.080
 looks

00:28:06.080 --> 00:28:06.380
 like

00:28:06.380 --> 00:28:07.060
 but look

00:28:07.060 --> 00:28:07.340
 at that

00:28:07.340 --> 00:28:07.340


00:28:07.460 --> 00:28:08.000
 look at

00:28:08.000 --> 00:28:08.600
 verse 24

00:28:08.600 --> 00:28:08.740
!

00:28:13.420 --> 00:28:13.820
 when Jesus

00:28:13.820 --> 00:28:14.320
 hands over

00:28:14.320 --> 00:28:14.759
 the world

00:28:14.759 --> 00:28:16.060
 to God

00:28:16.060 --> 00:28:17.420
 Christ's

00:28:17.420 --> 00:28:17.980
 submission to

00:28:17.980 --> 00:28:18.460
 the Father

00:28:18.460 --> 00:28:18.820
 is not

00:28:18.820 --> 00:28:19.140
 forced

00:28:19.140 --> 00:28:19.460
 it is

00:28:19.460 --> 00:28:19.960
 voluntary

00:28:19.960 --> 00:28:22.259
 it is

00:28:22.259 --> 00:28:22.620
 voluntary

00:28:22.620 --> 00:28:23.039
 and willing

00:28:23.039 --> 00:28:23.820
 he who

00:28:23.820 --> 00:28:25.400
 was equal

00:28:25.400 --> 00:28:25.660
 with God

00:28:25.660 --> 00:28:25.960
 did not

00:28:25.960 --> 00:28:26.600
 consider equality

00:28:26.600 --> 00:28:26.900
 with God

00:28:26.900 --> 00:28:27.300
 something to be

00:28:27.300 --> 00:28:27.600
 grasped

00:28:27.600 --> 00:28:27.820
 but made

00:28:27.820 --> 00:28:28.060
 himself

00:28:28.060 --> 00:28:28.279
 nothing

00:28:28.279 --> 00:28:28.580
 it is

00:28:28.580 --> 00:28:29.100
 voluntary

00:28:29.100 --> 00:28:31.519
 and willing

00:28:31.519 --> 00:28:32.160
 he's not

00:28:32.160 --> 00:28:32.620
 forced to

00:28:32.620 --> 00:28:32.800
 submit

00:28:32.800 --> 00:28:33.160
 he wants

00:28:33.160 --> 00:28:33.500
 to submit

00:28:33.500 --> 00:28:33.940
 he takes

00:28:33.940 --> 00:28:34.300
 the kingdom

00:28:34.300 --> 00:28:34.800
 that belongs

00:28:34.800 --> 00:28:35.039
 to him

00:28:35.039 --> 00:28:35.320
 and gives

00:28:35.320 --> 00:28:35.539
 it to

00:28:35.539 --> 00:28:35.660
 his

00:28:35.660 --> 00:28:35.980
 father

00:28:35.980 --> 00:28:37.920
 it's the

00:28:37.920 --> 00:28:38.240
 idea

00:28:38.240 --> 00:28:38.580
 you see

00:28:38.580 --> 00:28:39.160
 of voluntary

00:28:39.160 --> 00:28:39.680
 submission

00:28:39.680 --> 00:28:40.259
 creating

00:28:40.259 --> 00:28:40.700
 perfect

00:28:40.700 --> 00:28:41.200
 unity

00:28:41.200 --> 00:28:43.700
 so the

00:28:43.700 --> 00:28:43.980
 Father

00:28:43.980 --> 00:28:44.259
 Son

00:28:44.259 --> 00:28:44.600
 and Holy

00:28:44.600 --> 00:28:44.860
 Spirit

00:28:44.860 --> 00:28:45.160
 they all

00:28:45.160 --> 00:28:45.600
 agree

00:28:45.600 --> 00:28:47.000
 and they

00:28:47.000 --> 00:28:47.400
 all want

00:28:47.400 --> 00:28:47.620
 and they

00:28:47.620 --> 00:28:47.960
 will the

00:28:47.960 --> 00:28:48.360
 same thing

00:28:48.360 --> 00:28:48.580
 in this

00:28:48.580 --> 00:28:48.920
 perfect

00:28:48.920 --> 00:28:49.340
 fellowship

00:28:49.340 --> 00:28:51.019
 Christ's

00:28:51.019 --> 00:28:51.240
 will and

00:28:51.240 --> 00:28:51.360
 the

00:28:51.360 --> 00:28:51.640
 Father's

00:28:51.640 --> 00:28:51.880
 will are

00:28:51.880 --> 00:28:52.319
 perfectly

00:28:52.319 --> 00:28:52.660
 aligned

00:28:52.660 --> 00:28:52.980
 so that

00:28:52.980 --> 00:28:53.220
 there is

00:28:53.220 --> 00:28:53.500
 a new

00:28:53.500 --> 00:28:53.840
 creation

00:28:53.840 --> 00:28:54.120
 and a

00:28:54.120 --> 00:28:54.400
 perfect

00:28:54.400 --> 00:28:54.620
 new

00:28:54.620 --> 00:28:55.000
 world

00:28:55.000 --> 00:28:55.519
 and we're

00:28:55.519 --> 00:28:55.640
 going to

00:28:55.640 --> 00:28:55.980
 see that

00:28:55.980 --> 00:28:56.180
 aren't

00:28:56.180 --> 00:28:56.360
 we

00:28:56.360 --> 00:28:57.279
 in Ephesians

00:28:57.279 --> 00:28:58.480
 that the

00:28:58.480 --> 00:28:58.900
 goal of

00:28:58.900 --> 00:28:59.220
 everything

00:28:59.220 --> 00:28:59.580
 where the

00:28:59.580 --> 00:29:00.000
 world is

00:29:00.000 --> 00:29:00.299
 heading

00:29:00.299 --> 00:29:01.400
 is

00:29:01.400 --> 00:29:01.920
 everything

00:29:01.920 --> 00:29:02.360
 under

00:29:02.360 --> 00:29:02.700
 Christ

00:29:02.700 --> 00:29:03.000
 that is

00:29:03.000 --> 00:29:03.279
 God's

00:29:03.279 --> 00:29:04.039
 master plan

00:29:04.039 --> 00:29:05.299
 of how

00:29:05.299 --> 00:29:05.720
 to align

00:29:05.720 --> 00:29:06.200
 everything

00:29:06.200 --> 00:29:06.539
 in

00:29:06.539 --> 00:29:07.080
 creation

00:29:07.080 --> 00:29:07.519
 under

00:29:07.519 --> 00:29:08.160
 Christ

00:29:08.160 --> 00:29:10.160
 beneath

00:29:10.160 --> 00:29:10.380
 his

00:29:10.380 --> 00:29:10.759
 eternal

00:29:10.759 --> 00:29:11.180
 throne

00:29:11.200 --> 00:29:12.120
 and God

00:29:12.120 --> 00:29:12.420
 is doing

00:29:12.420 --> 00:29:12.740
 that now

00:29:12.740 --> 00:29:13.000
 in the

00:29:13.000 --> 00:29:13.279
 church

00:29:13.279 --> 00:29:13.620
 Jew

00:29:13.620 --> 00:29:13.819
 and

00:29:13.819 --> 00:29:14.480
 Gentile

00:29:14.480 --> 00:29:15.319
 all the

00:29:15.319 --> 00:29:15.620
 nations

00:29:15.620 --> 00:29:15.860
 of the

00:29:15.860 --> 00:29:16.080
 world

00:29:16.080 --> 00:29:16.360
 coming

00:29:16.360 --> 00:29:16.799
 together

00:29:16.799 --> 00:29:17.819
 and he's

00:29:17.819 --> 00:29:18.120
 doing it

00:29:18.120 --> 00:29:18.580
 in marriage

00:29:18.580 --> 00:29:19.100
 by husband

00:29:19.100 --> 00:29:19.640
 and wife

00:29:19.640 --> 00:29:20.580
 together

00:29:20.580 --> 00:29:21.140
 how

00:29:21.140 --> 00:29:21.440
 by the

00:29:21.440 --> 00:29:21.680
 husband

00:29:21.680 --> 00:29:21.980
 dying

00:29:21.980 --> 00:29:22.259
 for his

00:29:22.259 --> 00:29:22.539
 wife

00:29:22.539 --> 00:29:24.039
 and by

00:29:24.039 --> 00:29:24.180
 the

00:29:24.180 --> 00:29:24.360
 wife

00:29:24.360 --> 00:29:24.819
 aligning

00:29:24.819 --> 00:29:25.180
 her

00:29:25.180 --> 00:29:25.600
 will

00:29:25.600 --> 00:29:26.480
 with his

00:29:26.480 --> 00:29:26.700
 sort of

00:29:26.700 --> 00:29:27.120
 function

00:29:27.120 --> 00:29:27.559
 as one

00:29:27.559 --> 00:29:27.880
 as a

00:29:27.880 --> 00:29:28.259
 unit

00:29:28.259 --> 00:29:29.380
 as a

00:29:29.380 --> 00:29:29.620
 team

00:29:29.620 --> 00:29:29.900
 as one

00:29:29.900 --> 00:29:30.299
 flesh

00:29:30.299 --> 00:29:33.000
 and I

00:29:33.000 --> 00:29:33.279
 think what

00:29:33.279 --> 00:29:33.819
 this passage

00:29:33.819 --> 00:29:34.319
 does for

00:29:34.319 --> 00:29:34.400
 us

00:29:34.400 --> 00:29:34.700
 wonderfully

00:29:34.700 --> 00:29:34.960
 is it

00:29:34.960 --> 00:29:35.480
 lays out

00:29:35.480 --> 00:29:35.680
 for us

00:29:35.680 --> 00:29:36.080
 a picture

00:29:36.080 --> 00:29:36.319
 of a

00:29:36.319 --> 00:29:36.580
 husband

00:29:36.580 --> 00:29:37.100
 who lays

00:29:37.100 --> 00:29:37.680
 his wife

00:29:37.680 --> 00:29:38.600
 who lays

00:29:38.600 --> 00:29:39.059
 his life

00:29:39.059 --> 00:29:40.600
 down

00:29:40.599 --> 00:29:40.939
 down

00:29:40.939 --> 00:29:42.799
 his life

00:29:42.799 --> 00:29:43.039
 for his

00:29:43.039 --> 00:29:43.240
 wife

00:29:43.240 --> 00:29:43.519
 and it

00:29:43.519 --> 00:29:43.899
 says to

00:29:43.899 --> 00:29:44.419
 his wife

00:29:44.419 --> 00:29:45.719
 will you

00:29:45.719 --> 00:29:46.159
 live for

00:29:46.159 --> 00:29:46.759
 your husband

00:29:46.759 --> 00:29:49.119
 by learning

00:29:49.119 --> 00:29:49.559
 to trust

00:29:49.559 --> 00:29:49.859
 him

00:29:49.859 --> 00:29:51.399
 by submitting

00:29:51.399 --> 00:29:51.859
 to him

00:29:51.859 --> 00:29:52.859
 and his

00:29:52.859 --> 00:29:53.480
 love and care

00:29:53.480 --> 00:29:55.119
 and will you

00:29:55.119 --> 00:29:56.059
 gladly submit

00:29:56.059 --> 00:29:56.419
 to his

00:29:56.419 --> 00:29:56.919
 efforts

00:29:56.919 --> 00:29:57.519
 to take

00:29:57.519 --> 00:29:58.000
 initiative

00:29:58.000 --> 00:29:58.579
 and lead

00:29:58.579 --> 00:29:59.019
 you and take

00:29:59.019 --> 00:29:59.619
 responsibility

00:29:59.619 --> 00:30:00.859
 even though he

00:30:00.859 --> 00:30:01.419
 gets it wrong

00:30:01.419 --> 00:30:02.139
 lots of times

00:30:02.140 --> 00:30:04.900
 and I think

00:30:04.900 --> 00:30:05.259
 when a husband

00:30:05.259 --> 00:30:05.740
 does not

00:30:05.740 --> 00:30:06.140
 love his

00:30:06.140 --> 00:30:06.400
 wife

00:30:06.400 --> 00:30:06.700
 when he

00:30:06.700 --> 00:30:06.940
 stops

00:30:06.940 --> 00:30:07.420
 laying down

00:30:07.420 --> 00:30:07.860
 his life

00:30:07.860 --> 00:30:08.340
 and making

00:30:08.340 --> 00:30:08.900
 a sacrifice

00:30:08.900 --> 00:30:09.380
 for his

00:30:09.380 --> 00:30:09.720
 wife

00:30:09.720 --> 00:30:10.520
 then in

00:30:10.520 --> 00:30:11.080
 their own

00:30:11.080 --> 00:30:11.500
 marriage

00:30:11.500 --> 00:30:11.800
 he's

00:30:11.800 --> 00:30:12.520
 blaspheming

00:30:12.520 --> 00:30:13.000
 Christ

00:30:13.000 --> 00:30:13.759
 that's not

00:30:13.759 --> 00:30:14.360
 too strong

00:30:14.360 --> 00:30:16.780
 because he's

00:30:16.780 --> 00:30:17.360
 saying Jesus

00:30:17.360 --> 00:30:17.940
 really is a

00:30:17.940 --> 00:30:18.320
 husband who

00:30:18.320 --> 00:30:18.640
 doesn't love

00:30:18.640 --> 00:30:19.000
 his people

00:30:19.000 --> 00:30:20.940
 and when a

00:30:20.940 --> 00:30:21.200
 wife says

00:30:21.200 --> 00:30:21.700
 actually I

00:30:21.700 --> 00:30:22.259
 cannot submit

00:30:22.259 --> 00:30:22.540
 to my

00:30:22.540 --> 00:30:22.740
 husband

00:30:22.740 --> 00:30:23.080
 it is

00:30:23.080 --> 00:30:23.660
 degrading

00:30:23.660 --> 00:30:23.980
 for me

00:30:23.980 --> 00:30:24.259
 as a

00:30:24.259 --> 00:30:24.520
 woman

00:30:24.520 --> 00:30:25.100
 well that

00:30:25.100 --> 00:30:25.440
 woman is

00:30:25.440 --> 00:30:25.759
 saying that

00:30:25.759 --> 00:30:26.320
 submitting to

00:30:26.320 --> 00:30:26.560
 Christ

00:30:26.560 --> 00:30:26.920
 is an

00:30:26.920 --> 00:30:27.440
 insult

00:30:27.440 --> 00:30:29.680
 something I

00:30:29.680 --> 00:30:30.040
 shouldn't have

00:30:30.040 --> 00:30:30.400
 to do

00:30:30.400 --> 00:30:33.460
 I suspect

00:30:33.460 --> 00:30:34.060
 we husbands

00:30:34.060 --> 00:30:34.740
 we tend

00:30:34.740 --> 00:30:35.340
 to express

00:30:35.340 --> 00:30:36.080
 our own

00:30:36.080 --> 00:30:36.720
 form of

00:30:36.720 --> 00:30:37.280
 selfishness

00:30:37.280 --> 00:30:38.000
 by shrinking

00:30:38.000 --> 00:30:38.920
 from initiative

00:30:38.920 --> 00:30:40.540
 and responsibility

00:30:40.540 --> 00:30:42.780
 and we tend

00:30:42.780 --> 00:30:43.860
 to hide behind

00:30:43.860 --> 00:30:44.780
 providing for our

00:30:44.780 --> 00:30:45.220
 wives

00:30:45.220 --> 00:30:46.120
 I provide for

00:30:46.120 --> 00:30:46.440
 them that's

00:30:46.440 --> 00:30:46.740
 enough

00:30:46.740 --> 00:30:48.700
 I'm afraid

00:30:48.700 --> 00:30:49.140
 to be loving

00:30:49.140 --> 00:30:49.620
 and I think

00:30:49.620 --> 00:30:50.259
 wives can

00:30:50.259 --> 00:30:51.220
 tend to express

00:30:51.220 --> 00:30:52.120
 their selfishness

00:30:52.120 --> 00:30:52.800
 by wanting to

00:30:52.800 --> 00:30:53.420
 dominate their

00:30:53.420 --> 00:30:53.960
 husbands

00:30:53.960 --> 00:30:56.180
 maybe to

00:30:56.180 --> 00:30:56.880
 manipulate and

00:30:56.880 --> 00:30:57.400
 control

00:30:57.400 --> 00:30:58.000
 mocking

00:30:58.000 --> 00:30:58.759
 belittling

00:30:58.759 --> 00:30:59.960
 criticizing

00:30:59.960 --> 00:31:00.860
 his efforts

00:31:00.860 --> 00:31:03.519
 so for

00:31:03.519 --> 00:31:03.900
 wives

00:31:03.900 --> 00:31:04.680
 what will

00:31:04.680 --> 00:31:06.180
 a husband

00:31:06.180 --> 00:31:06.740
 say about

00:31:06.740 --> 00:31:06.980
 you

00:31:06.980 --> 00:31:08.079
 in 15

00:31:08.079 --> 00:31:08.460
 20

00:31:08.460 --> 00:31:08.759
 30

00:31:08.759 --> 00:31:09.019
 40

00:31:09.019 --> 00:31:09.500
 years

00:31:09.500 --> 00:31:10.880
 even the

00:31:10.880 --> 00:31:11.360
 caricature

00:31:11.360 --> 00:31:11.920
 of Mrs

00:31:11.920 --> 00:31:12.279
 Married

00:31:12.279 --> 00:31:12.920
 let's get

00:31:12.920 --> 00:31:13.500
 Mr Married

00:31:13.500 --> 00:31:13.759
 up the

00:31:13.759 --> 00:31:13.960
 front

00:31:13.960 --> 00:31:14.380
 well let's

00:31:14.380 --> 00:31:14.620
 take him

00:31:14.620 --> 00:31:14.819
 to the

00:31:14.819 --> 00:31:15.039
 pub

00:31:15.039 --> 00:31:16.059
 he's in

00:31:16.059 --> 00:31:16.460
 the pub

00:31:16.460 --> 00:31:17.420
 he's been

00:31:17.420 --> 00:31:17.960
 working late

00:31:17.960 --> 00:31:18.380
 just to get

00:31:18.380 --> 00:31:18.680
 out of the

00:31:18.680 --> 00:31:18.900
 house

00:31:18.900 --> 00:31:19.180
 and you

00:31:19.180 --> 00:31:19.480
 know how

00:31:19.480 --> 00:31:19.960
 Mr Married

00:31:19.960 --> 00:31:20.440
 speaks about

00:31:20.440 --> 00:31:20.860
 his wife

00:31:20.860 --> 00:31:21.279
 no you

00:31:21.279 --> 00:31:21.460
 don't

00:31:21.460 --> 00:31:21.759
 because he

00:31:21.759 --> 00:31:22.360
 never does

00:31:22.360 --> 00:31:24.840
 he's probably

00:31:24.840 --> 00:31:25.319
 not complaining

00:31:25.319 --> 00:31:25.620
 about his

00:31:25.620 --> 00:31:26.000
 wife at all

00:31:26.000 --> 00:31:26.380
 but if he

00:31:26.380 --> 00:31:26.740
 is he

00:31:26.740 --> 00:31:27.180
 complains

00:31:27.180 --> 00:31:27.799
 how she

00:31:27.799 --> 00:31:28.000
 always

00:31:28.000 --> 00:31:28.519
 likes him

00:31:28.519 --> 00:31:29.539
 how she

00:31:29.539 --> 00:31:30.180
 criticizes

00:31:30.180 --> 00:31:30.500
 him

00:31:30.500 --> 00:31:32.599
 but imagine

00:31:32.599 --> 00:31:32.859
 that a

00:31:32.859 --> 00:31:33.359
 husband

00:31:33.359 --> 00:31:33.980
 in 15

00:31:33.980 --> 00:31:34.339
 20

00:31:34.339 --> 00:31:34.740
 40

00:31:34.740 --> 00:31:35.099
 60

00:31:35.099 --> 00:31:35.379
 years

00:31:35.379 --> 00:31:35.740
 time

00:31:35.740 --> 00:31:36.940
 with his

00:31:36.940 --> 00:31:37.220
 friends

00:31:37.220 --> 00:31:37.599
 tells

00:31:37.599 --> 00:31:38.339
 how much

00:31:38.339 --> 00:31:38.700
 he loves

00:31:38.700 --> 00:31:39.160
 his wife

00:31:39.160 --> 00:31:42.259
 how much

00:31:42.259 --> 00:31:42.720
 he depends

00:31:42.720 --> 00:31:43.119
 on her

00:31:43.119 --> 00:31:43.940
 for so much

00:31:43.940 --> 00:31:44.359
 of who he

00:31:44.359 --> 00:31:44.759
 is and what

00:31:44.759 --> 00:31:45.259
 he does

00:31:45.259 --> 00:31:48.019
 and I think

00:31:48.019 --> 00:31:48.559
 we need to

00:31:48.559 --> 00:31:49.299
 read this

00:31:49.299 --> 00:31:50.099
 passage

00:31:50.099 --> 00:31:51.660
 Ephesians 5

00:31:51.660 --> 00:31:52.200
 you're back

00:31:52.200 --> 00:31:52.519
 there with

00:31:52.519 --> 00:31:52.799
 me

00:31:52.799 --> 00:31:54.559
 with the

00:31:54.559 --> 00:31:54.839
 kind of

00:31:54.839 --> 00:31:55.480
 operating

00:31:55.480 --> 00:31:56.159
 assumption

00:31:56.159 --> 00:31:57.759
 that the

00:31:57.759 --> 00:31:58.200
 commands

00:31:58.200 --> 00:31:58.740
 to each

00:31:58.740 --> 00:31:59.019
 of the

00:31:59.019 --> 00:31:59.519
 husbands

00:31:59.519 --> 00:32:00.779
 and wives

00:32:00.779 --> 00:32:01.480
 are specific

00:32:01.480 --> 00:32:01.980
 let me try

00:32:01.980 --> 00:32:02.319
 and tell you

00:32:02.319 --> 00:32:02.579
 what I mean

00:32:02.579 --> 00:32:03.359
 I know I'm

00:32:03.359 --> 00:32:03.819
 late but

00:32:03.819 --> 00:32:04.440
 let me try

00:32:04.440 --> 00:32:04.759
 and teach you

00:32:04.759 --> 00:32:05.119
 this before

00:32:05.119 --> 00:32:05.539
 I finish

00:32:05.539 --> 00:32:06.799
 they are

00:32:06.799 --> 00:32:07.539
 not exclusive

00:32:07.539 --> 00:32:08.680
 to each

00:32:08.680 --> 00:32:09.139
 of them

00:32:09.139 --> 00:32:11.460
 but they

00:32:11.460 --> 00:32:12.019
 are specific

00:32:12.019 --> 00:32:13.339
 so in other

00:32:13.339 --> 00:32:13.759
 words wives

00:32:13.759 --> 00:32:14.259
 are told to

00:32:14.259 --> 00:32:14.819
 respect their

00:32:14.819 --> 00:32:15.339
 husbands

00:32:15.339 --> 00:32:17.720
 and husbands

00:32:17.720 --> 00:32:18.200
 are told to

00:32:18.200 --> 00:32:18.539
 love their

00:32:18.539 --> 00:32:18.819
 wives

00:32:18.819 --> 00:32:19.180
 it doesn't

00:32:19.180 --> 00:32:19.460
 mean that

00:32:19.460 --> 00:32:20.319
 wives are

00:32:20.319 --> 00:32:20.680
 not to

00:32:20.680 --> 00:32:21.039
 love their

00:32:21.039 --> 00:32:21.299
 husbands

00:32:21.299 --> 00:32:21.659
 of course

00:32:21.659 --> 00:32:22.119
 they are

00:32:22.119 --> 00:32:23.619
 or their

00:32:23.619 --> 00:32:23.879
 husbands

00:32:23.879 --> 00:32:24.299
 need to

00:32:24.299 --> 00:32:24.579
 respect

00:32:24.579 --> 00:32:24.779
 their

00:32:24.779 --> 00:32:25.000
 wives

00:32:25.000 --> 00:32:25.299
 of course

00:32:25.299 --> 00:32:25.559
 they do

00:32:25.559 --> 00:32:25.859
 but when

00:32:25.859 --> 00:32:26.179
 a command

00:32:26.179 --> 00:32:26.519
 like this

00:32:26.519 --> 00:32:26.879
 is given

00:32:26.879 --> 00:32:27.239
 I think

00:32:27.239 --> 00:32:27.639
 there's an

00:32:27.639 --> 00:32:28.159
 underlying

00:32:28.159 --> 00:32:28.719
 rationale

00:32:28.719 --> 00:32:29.379
 for it

00:32:29.379 --> 00:32:29.699
 alright

00:32:29.699 --> 00:32:31.739
 when Jesus

00:32:31.739 --> 00:32:32.219
 told Peter

00:32:32.219 --> 00:32:32.739
 feed my

00:32:32.739 --> 00:32:33.099
 sheep

00:32:33.099 --> 00:32:33.879
 he doesn't

00:32:33.879 --> 00:32:34.179
 mean that

00:32:34.179 --> 00:32:34.819
 Peter himself

00:32:34.819 --> 00:32:35.179
 will never

00:32:35.179 --> 00:32:35.619
 need to be

00:32:35.619 --> 00:32:36.000
 fed

00:32:36.000 --> 00:32:36.439
 does he

00:32:36.439 --> 00:32:37.659
 he means

00:32:37.659 --> 00:32:38.059
 the particular

00:32:38.059 --> 00:32:38.799
 quality of a

00:32:38.799 --> 00:32:39.079
 sheep

00:32:39.079 --> 00:32:39.579
 is that it

00:32:39.579 --> 00:32:40.119
 needs feeding

00:32:40.119 --> 00:32:40.739
 and I think

00:32:40.739 --> 00:32:41.219
 it works this

00:32:41.219 --> 00:32:41.799
 way here too

00:32:41.799 --> 00:32:42.619
 the particular

00:32:42.619 --> 00:32:43.459
 quality of a

00:32:43.459 --> 00:32:43.759
 woman

00:32:43.759 --> 00:32:44.619
 of a wife

00:32:44.619 --> 00:32:45.299
 is that she

00:32:45.299 --> 00:32:45.739
 needs to be

00:32:45.739 --> 00:32:46.099
 loved

00:32:46.099 --> 00:32:49.279
 and the

00:32:49.279 --> 00:32:49.519
 particular

00:32:49.519 --> 00:32:50.159
 quality of a

00:32:50.159 --> 00:32:50.599
 man or a

00:32:50.599 --> 00:32:51.079
 husband is that

00:32:51.079 --> 00:32:51.500
 he needs to

00:32:51.500 --> 00:32:52.099
 be respected

00:32:52.099 --> 00:32:52.099


00:32:52.119 --> 00:32:52.979
 do you get

00:32:52.979 --> 00:32:53.259
 that

00:32:53.259 --> 00:32:55.879
 just listen

00:32:55.879 --> 00:32:56.079
 to this

00:32:56.079 --> 00:32:56.379
 I've been

00:32:56.379 --> 00:32:57.339
 quoting loads

00:32:57.339 --> 00:32:57.719
 in the last

00:32:57.719 --> 00:32:58.039
 couple of

00:32:58.039 --> 00:32:58.299
 weeks

00:32:58.299 --> 00:32:58.759
 and I'm

00:32:58.759 --> 00:32:58.939
 going to

00:32:58.939 --> 00:32:59.819
 stop it

00:32:59.819 --> 00:33:04.179
 listen to

00:33:04.179 --> 00:33:04.439
 this

00:33:04.439 --> 00:33:06.279
 the commands

00:33:06.279 --> 00:33:06.939
 are given

00:33:06.939 --> 00:33:07.359
 to the

00:33:07.359 --> 00:33:07.879
 respective

00:33:07.879 --> 00:33:09.459
 weaknesses

00:33:09.459 --> 00:33:09.859
 of our

00:33:09.859 --> 00:33:10.199
 duties

00:33:10.199 --> 00:33:12.139
 men need

00:33:12.139 --> 00:33:12.559
 to do their

00:33:12.559 --> 00:33:12.979
 duty with

00:33:12.979 --> 00:33:13.379
 regard to

00:33:13.379 --> 00:33:13.799
 their wives

00:33:13.799 --> 00:33:14.339
 they need

00:33:14.339 --> 00:33:15.039
 to love

00:33:15.039 --> 00:33:16.599
 women need

00:33:16.599 --> 00:33:16.959
 to do their

00:33:16.959 --> 00:33:17.379
 duty in the

00:33:17.379 --> 00:33:17.699
 same way

00:33:17.699 --> 00:33:17.979
 they need

00:33:17.979 --> 00:33:18.479
 to respect

00:33:18.480 --> 00:33:19.120
 women

00:33:19.120 --> 00:33:20.819
 are fully

00:33:20.819 --> 00:33:21.519
 capable of

00:33:21.519 --> 00:33:22.000
 loving a

00:33:22.000 --> 00:33:22.480
 man and

00:33:22.480 --> 00:33:23.120
 sacrificing

00:33:23.120 --> 00:33:23.759
 for him

00:33:23.759 --> 00:33:24.720
 while believing

00:33:24.720 --> 00:33:25.480
 the entire

00:33:25.480 --> 00:33:26.539
 time that

00:33:26.539 --> 00:33:26.980
 he is a

00:33:26.980 --> 00:33:27.579
 true and

00:33:27.579 --> 00:33:28.299
 unvarnished

00:33:28.299 --> 00:33:28.799
 jerk

00:33:28.799 --> 00:33:30.860
 women are

00:33:30.860 --> 00:33:31.339
 good at

00:33:31.339 --> 00:33:31.759
 this kind

00:33:31.759 --> 00:33:32.299
 of love

00:33:32.299 --> 00:33:34.059
 but the

00:33:34.059 --> 00:33:34.440
 central

00:33:34.440 --> 00:33:35.000
 requirement

00:33:35.000 --> 00:33:35.559
 given to

00:33:35.559 --> 00:33:36.180
 wives is

00:33:36.180 --> 00:33:36.440
 that they

00:33:36.440 --> 00:33:37.140
 respect their

00:33:37.140 --> 00:33:37.740
 husbands

00:33:37.740 --> 00:33:40.460
 as Christian

00:33:40.460 --> 00:33:41.140
 women gather

00:33:41.140 --> 00:33:42.140
 together maybe

00:33:42.140 --> 00:33:42.680
 for prayer

00:33:42.680 --> 00:33:43.160
 or Bible

00:33:43.160 --> 00:33:43.519
 study

00:33:43.519 --> 00:33:44.980
 they frequently

00:33:44.980 --> 00:33:45.480
 speak about

00:33:45.480 --> 00:33:45.920
 their husbands

00:33:45.920 --> 00:33:46.319
 in the most

00:33:46.319 --> 00:33:46.900
 disrespectful

00:33:46.900 --> 00:33:47.799
 way

00:33:47.799 --> 00:33:49.180
 then they

00:33:49.180 --> 00:33:49.579
 hurry home

00:33:49.579 --> 00:33:49.940
 to cook

00:33:49.940 --> 00:33:50.400
 clean and

00:33:50.400 --> 00:33:50.660
 care for

00:33:50.660 --> 00:33:50.960
 his kids

00:33:50.960 --> 00:33:51.220
 why?

00:33:51.359 --> 00:33:51.819
 because they

00:33:51.819 --> 00:33:52.220
 love him

00:33:52.220 --> 00:33:54.539
 it is not

00:33:54.539 --> 00:33:55.279
 wrong for

00:33:55.279 --> 00:33:55.759
 the wives

00:33:55.759 --> 00:33:56.180
 to love

00:33:56.180 --> 00:33:57.000
 their husbands

00:33:57.000 --> 00:33:57.940
 but it is

00:33:57.940 --> 00:33:58.539
 wrong to

00:33:58.539 --> 00:33:59.000
 substitute

00:33:59.000 --> 00:34:00.099
 love for

00:34:00.099 --> 00:34:00.779
 the respect

00:34:00.779 --> 00:34:01.940
 God requires

00:34:01.940 --> 00:34:04.980
 so often we

00:34:04.980 --> 00:34:05.420
 are like the

00:34:05.420 --> 00:34:05.740
 man who

00:34:05.740 --> 00:34:06.019
 gave his

00:34:06.019 --> 00:34:06.339
 wife a

00:34:06.339 --> 00:34:07.019
 shotgun for

00:34:07.019 --> 00:34:07.319
 Christmas

00:34:07.319 --> 00:34:07.759
 because he

00:34:07.759 --> 00:34:08.360
 wanted one

00:34:08.360 --> 00:34:10.039
 when a

00:34:10.039 --> 00:34:10.400
 wife is

00:34:10.400 --> 00:34:10.699
 trying to

00:34:10.699 --> 00:34:11.199
 work on a

00:34:11.199 --> 00:34:11.480
 troubled

00:34:11.480 --> 00:34:12.059
 marriage

00:34:12.059 --> 00:34:12.780
 she gives

00:34:12.780 --> 00:34:13.320
 her husband

00:34:13.320 --> 00:34:13.940
 what she

00:34:13.940 --> 00:34:14.539
 would like

00:34:14.539 --> 00:34:15.120
 and not

00:34:15.120 --> 00:34:15.519
 what God

00:34:15.519 --> 00:34:15.960
 commanded

00:34:15.960 --> 00:34:16.300
 and not

00:34:16.300 --> 00:34:16.460
 what he

00:34:16.460 --> 00:34:16.840
 needs

00:34:16.840 --> 00:34:18.140
 she loves

00:34:18.140 --> 00:34:18.300
 him

00:34:18.300 --> 00:34:19.920
 but does

00:34:19.920 --> 00:34:20.500
 she respect

00:34:20.500 --> 00:34:20.800
 him?

00:34:21.260 --> 00:34:21.559
 and tell

00:34:21.559 --> 00:34:21.820
 him she

00:34:21.820 --> 00:34:22.200
 respects

00:34:22.200 --> 00:34:22.500
 him

00:34:22.500 --> 00:34:23.920
 we have

00:34:23.920 --> 00:34:24.500
 difficulties

00:34:24.500 --> 00:34:25.080
 because we

00:34:25.080 --> 00:34:25.580
 do not

00:34:25.580 --> 00:34:26.140
 follow the

00:34:26.140 --> 00:34:26.720
 Bible's

00:34:26.720 --> 00:34:27.340
 instructions

00:34:27.340 --> 00:34:28.240
 when a

00:34:28.240 --> 00:34:28.620
 man is

00:34:28.620 --> 00:34:29.200
 communicating

00:34:29.200 --> 00:34:29.740
 his love

00:34:29.740 --> 00:34:30.019
 for his

00:34:30.019 --> 00:34:31.059
 wife both

00:34:31.059 --> 00:34:31.960
 verbally and

00:34:31.960 --> 00:34:32.680
 non-verbally

00:34:32.680 --> 00:34:33.620
 he should be

00:34:33.620 --> 00:34:34.240
 seeking to

00:34:34.240 --> 00:34:34.960
 communicate to

00:34:34.960 --> 00:34:35.760
 her the

00:34:35.760 --> 00:34:37.039
 security provided

00:34:37.039 --> 00:34:37.600
 by his

00:34:37.600 --> 00:34:38.260
 covenantal

00:34:38.260 --> 00:34:38.640
 commitment

00:34:38.640 --> 00:34:39.940
 he will

00:34:39.940 --> 00:34:40.539
 provide her

00:34:40.539 --> 00:34:41.080
 he will

00:34:41.080 --> 00:34:41.700
 nourish her

00:34:41.700 --> 00:34:42.519
 and cherish

00:34:42.519 --> 00:34:42.900
 her

00:34:42.900 --> 00:34:43.559
 he will

00:34:43.559 --> 00:34:44.019
 sacrifice

00:34:44.019 --> 00:34:44.460
 her

00:34:44.460 --> 00:34:45.200
 her need

00:34:45.200 --> 00:34:45.420
 is to

00:34:45.420 --> 00:34:45.960
 be secure

00:34:45.960 --> 00:34:46.880
 in his

00:34:46.880 --> 00:34:47.460
 love for

00:34:47.460 --> 00:34:47.840
 her

00:34:47.840 --> 00:34:49.059
 her need

00:34:49.059 --> 00:34:49.559
 is to

00:34:49.559 --> 00:34:49.920
 receive

00:34:49.920 --> 00:34:50.340
 love

00:34:50.340 --> 00:34:50.920
 from him

00:34:50.920 --> 00:34:52.240
 but when

00:34:52.240 --> 00:34:52.720
 a wife

00:34:52.720 --> 00:34:53.639
 is honouring

00:34:53.639 --> 00:34:54.500
 and respecting

00:34:54.500 --> 00:34:55.340
 her husband

00:34:55.340 --> 00:34:56.860
 the transaction

00:34:56.860 --> 00:34:57.260
 is quite

00:34:57.260 --> 00:34:57.740
 different

00:34:57.740 --> 00:34:59.280
 instead of

00:34:59.280 --> 00:35:00.019
 concentrating on

00:35:00.019 --> 00:35:00.599
 the security

00:35:00.599 --> 00:35:01.019
 of the

00:35:01.019 --> 00:35:01.539
 relationship

00:35:01.539 --> 00:35:02.700
 respect is

00:35:02.700 --> 00:35:03.360
 directed to

00:35:03.360 --> 00:35:04.000
 his abilities

00:35:04.000 --> 00:35:04.760
 and achievements

00:35:04.760 --> 00:35:05.360
 how hard

00:35:05.360 --> 00:35:05.780
 he works

00:35:05.780 --> 00:35:06.760
 how faithfully

00:35:06.760 --> 00:35:07.220
 he comes

00:35:07.220 --> 00:35:07.519
 home

00:35:07.519 --> 00:35:08.380
 how patient

00:35:08.380 --> 00:35:08.860
 he is

00:35:08.860 --> 00:35:09.240
 with the

00:35:09.240 --> 00:35:09.480
 kids

00:35:09.480 --> 00:35:10.000
 and so

00:35:10.000 --> 00:35:10.500
 forth

00:35:10.500 --> 00:35:11.860
 there's a

00:35:11.860 --> 00:35:12.400
 long quotation

00:35:12.400 --> 00:35:12.840
 I know that

00:35:12.840 --> 00:35:13.179
 but I wonder

00:35:13.179 --> 00:35:13.579
 what you make

00:35:13.579 --> 00:35:14.039
 of it

00:35:14.039 --> 00:35:17.219
 different needs

00:35:17.219 --> 00:35:17.760
 I've not seen

00:35:17.760 --> 00:35:18.079
 it before

00:35:18.079 --> 00:35:18.579
 studying this

00:35:18.579 --> 00:35:18.920
 in the last

00:35:18.920 --> 00:35:19.360
 few months

00:35:19.360 --> 00:35:20.519
 love

00:35:20.519 --> 00:35:21.639
 and respect

00:35:21.639 --> 00:35:24.380
 different means

00:35:24.380 --> 00:35:25.260
 of meeting

00:35:25.260 --> 00:35:26.340
 those needs

00:35:26.340 --> 00:35:27.980
 and whether

00:35:27.980 --> 00:35:28.619
 you agree

00:35:28.619 --> 00:35:29.539
 or disagree

00:35:29.539 --> 00:35:30.079
 with the way

00:35:30.079 --> 00:35:30.699
 those specific

00:35:30.699 --> 00:35:31.280
 works

00:35:31.280 --> 00:35:32.820
 I simply want

00:35:32.820 --> 00:35:33.400
 to end by

00:35:33.400 --> 00:35:34.000
 saying for

00:35:34.000 --> 00:35:34.780
 both of those

00:35:34.780 --> 00:35:35.420
 things to be

00:35:35.420 --> 00:35:35.740
 given

00:35:35.739 --> 00:35:37.059
 love

00:35:37.059 --> 00:35:38.239
 and respect

00:35:38.239 --> 00:35:38.939
 for both of

00:35:38.939 --> 00:35:39.299
 them to be

00:35:39.299 --> 00:35:39.919
 given and

00:35:39.919 --> 00:35:40.419
 received

00:35:40.419 --> 00:35:41.119
 marriage

00:35:41.119 --> 00:35:41.819
 means

00:35:41.819 --> 00:35:42.899
 death

00:35:42.899 --> 00:35:45.779
 death

00:35:45.779 --> 00:35:46.839
 to myself

00:35:46.839 --> 00:35:49.019
 death

00:35:49.019 --> 00:35:49.779
 to my own

00:35:49.779 --> 00:35:50.159
 ways

00:35:50.159 --> 00:35:50.659
 and my

00:35:50.659 --> 00:35:51.319
 desires

00:35:51.319 --> 00:35:52.359
 and death

00:35:52.359 --> 00:35:52.979
 because I

00:35:52.979 --> 00:35:53.500
 have learned

00:35:53.500 --> 00:35:54.219
 at the foot

00:35:54.219 --> 00:35:54.899
 of the cross

00:35:54.899 --> 00:35:56.019
 to submit

00:35:56.019 --> 00:35:56.599
 myself to

00:35:56.599 --> 00:35:56.819
 the will

00:35:56.819 --> 00:35:57.199
 of another

00:35:57.199 --> 00:35:58.659
 who gave

00:35:58.659 --> 00:35:59.219
 himself for

00:35:59.219 --> 00:35:59.479
 me

00:35:59.479 --> 00:36:00.779
 to make

00:36:00.779 --> 00:36:01.459
 me spotless

00:36:01.459 --> 00:36:04.399
 copy the

00:36:04.399 --> 00:36:05.039
 divine marriage

00:36:05.039 --> 00:36:05.659
 between Christ

00:36:05.659 --> 00:36:05.880
 and the

00:36:05.880 --> 00:36:06.219
 bride

00:36:06.219 --> 00:36:08.139
 copy it

00:36:08.139 --> 00:36:09.800
 and live

00:36:09.800 --> 00:36:10.059
 it

00:36:10.059 --> 00:36:12.139
 and your

00:36:12.139 --> 00:36:12.639
 marriage will

00:36:12.639 --> 00:36:13.179
 be beautiful

00:36:13.179 --> 00:36:15.340
 Amen