If you have your Bible with you, you can open it up to 1 Timothy.
We're continuing our way through the book.
And with the exception of the last verse of chapter 3,
we have now finished the first four chapters of the book,
so we've only got two left.
And today we're going to pick up Paul's letter here in chapter 5.
1 Timothy chapter 5.
Let me read our passage for us this morning.
Beginning in verse 1.
Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father.
Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers,
and younger women as sisters with absolute purity.
Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need.
But if a widow has children or grandchildren,
these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice
by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents.
For this is pleasing to God.
The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God
and continues night and day to pray and to ask God for help.
But the widow who lives for pleasure is dead even while she lives.
Give the people these instructions so that no one may be open to blame.
Anyone who does not provide for their relatives and especially for their own household
has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
No widow may be put on the list of widows unless she is over 60,
has been faithful to her husband, and is well known for her good deeds,
such as bringing up children, showing hospitality,
washing the feet of the Lord's people,
helping those in trouble,
and devoting herself to all kinds of good deeds.
As for younger widows,
do not put them on such a list,
for when their sensual desires overcome their dedication to Christ,
they want to marry.
Thus they bring judgment on themselves
because they have broken their first pledge.
Besides,
they get into the habit of being idle
and going about from house to house,
and not only do they become idlers,
but also busybodies,
who talk nonsense,
saying things they ought not to.
So I counsel younger widows to marry,
to have children,
to manage their homes,
and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander.
Some have in fact already turned away to follow Satan.
If any woman who is a believer has widows in her care,
she should continue to help them
and not let the church be burdened with them
so that the church can help those widows
who are really in need.
This passage has two distinct parts.
In the first part,
Paul gives instructions to Timothy
about how to relate to other people in the church.
That's in verses 1 and 2.
The second part contains instructions
for how to care for widows in the church,
which is verse 3 all the way down to 16.
And with only a quick read-through of this passage,
we may think that these words are not really that relevant to us.
Unless, of course, we have a large church
with a whole bunch of widows.
But if we take time to really reflect
over the meaning of these words,
there's actually a lot here that applies to us.
Let's start at the top with the first couple verses.
Paul says to Timothy,
Do not rebuke an older man harshly,
but exhort him as if he were your father.
Treat younger men as brothers,
older women as mothers,
and younger women as sisters
with absolute purity.
We all have all kinds of differences
here in the church,
but we have been brought together
by our common faith in Jesus.
But now, how are we to get along
with one another?
Jesus says,
Treat one another as family.
Now, family relationships in a fallen world
are not always easy.
Sometimes they fail to be what they should be.
But we all know the ideal.
We all have a yearning for good family relationships.
We all know that friends come and go,
but family will always be family.
The son of your mother
will always be your brother.
And there's to be a special loyalty
and commitment that goes with family.
Treat one another here in the church
as family.
Like that,
says Jesus.
This is one of the main themes
of this whole letter to Timothy.
If we look back to chapter 3,
Paul said,
I'm writing you these instructions
so that you will know
how people ought to conduct themselves
in God's household,
which is the church of the living God.
So what is the church?
It is a household.
A family.
And so we are to treat one another
as family,
says Christ.
We are to be like brothers and sisters
to one another,
mothers and fathers
and sons and daughters
to each other.
There are at least two aspects of family
that should be reflected
in our relationships
with each other here in the church.
One is purity
and the other
is care for each other's needs.
Look at what Paul says here in verse 2.
He says,
Treat younger women as sisters
with absolute purity.
Sometimes we may wonder
how to interact.
How do we conduct ourselves
with the members
of the opposite sex
here in the church?
Well, Christ makes it
really simple for us.
He says,
Just treat them like you would
a family member
of the opposite sex
with absolute purity.
which for us men
means
be a good brother
to the women.
A good brother
watches out
for his sisters.
A good brother
uses his strength
to protect his sisters.
A good brother
never even thinks
about doing anything
inappropriate
with his sisters.
She's your sister.
A good brother
longs for his sister
to be loved and cherished
by an honorable man.
A good brother
helps his sister out
when she's in need
of assistance.
A good brother
talks to his sisters
and asks them
how they're doing.
Cares about the things
going on in their lives
when they're together.
And I could go on,
but you get the idea.
And this principle
of family applies
in all the other ways
as well.
Women
be good sisters
to the men
in the church.
What does that mean?
I'm not going to
flesh all of these
out,
but I would encourage
us all to reflect
on these things
this week.
What does it mean
to be a good brother
to the women
in the church?
What does it mean
to be a good sister
to the men
in the church?
For those of us
who are younger,
what does it mean
to treat older men
in the church
as you would
your father?
How should you
treat your father?
Paul tells us
in this passage
just one way,
one example.
He says,
don't rebuke them
harshly,
but exhort them
or bring up
an issue with them
respectfully,
gently.
That's just one example.
How else should you
treat your father?
It reflects on how
we should interact
with the older men
in the church.
How should you
treat your mother?
Same thing
towards the women.
How does a good father
or mother
treat their children?
How should we relate
to all the children
here in the church?
Family is the pattern
that God has given us.
More than that,
family is the spiritual reality
that Jesus has brought
about for us.
It's not just a pattern
to follow,
it's who we are
in Christ.
We are brothers
and sisters
through our union
with him.
The church is not a club
or an organization
like we see in the world.
It's a family.
And family relationships
are marked by purity.
That's the first thing
we aspect,
we see a family.
And the second one,
family relationships
are marked by care
for one another.
And not just the neighborly care,
but another level
of care for one another.
And we're going to see
that fleshed out fully
in the next verses
as it pertains to widows.
But let's just think
about this in general.
Family has each other's backs.
Family sacrifices
in love for each other.
Family stays by your side
when you're in the hospital.
family will not let you
go hungry
when times are hard.
Family makes time
for each other.
Family cares deeply
about the dignity
and honor
of each other.
And that's how we're to be
as a church
in our relationships
with each other.
Family.
Because we are
the household of God.
So I want to encourage
us all to just reflect
on this this week
to ask ourselves
this question.
How have I been relating
to the various other people
in the church?
Some of you are
wonderful examples
of this
and I noticed it right away
when I first moved here
six years ago
that this church
had more of a feeling
of family
than any other church
I had been in before.
But let's not think
that we've fully arrived yet.
We can grow closer.
We can grow stronger.
We can grow healthier
as a family.
As a household.
And so I want to invite
each of you
to take time this week
to reflect
on your own relationships
with the people
in the church.
How have I been treating
others in the church?
May the Lord speak to us
about that
this week.
Now on the topic
of family
what comes next
in verses
3 to 16
makes a lot of sense.
Paul's not just
trying to help
Timothy solve
some challenging issue
that's only relevant
to Ephesus
with these widows.
It's more than that.
He's showing how
this kind of
familial care
should happen
for the neediest
members
of the church.
For the widows.
what's it like
to be a widow?
A widow is a woman
who was married
but whose husband
has died
and is now
unmarried.
And back in these days
they didn't have
Canada Pension Plan
or old age security
so an older
widow
might find herself
in a real bind
after her husband
passed away.
And so
Paul urges
Timothy
to apply
this principle
of family care
and love
to those
who are truly
in need
in the larger
church family.
He says
give proper
recognition
to those widows
who are really
in need.
Don't overlook
them.
Don't let them
lack
the basic
needs
or the provisions.
Treat them
honorably
as if they
were part
of your
family
and see
to it
that their
needs
are met.
And as Paul
goes on
we notice
that there
are some
other important
instructions
that he has
when it comes
to this.
The church
is to help
provide for
widows
who are in
need
but
the church
is not
to become
a sort
of assisted
living
household
where
sons and
daughters
just drop
off their
parents
in their
elderly
years
for free
care
and then
the children
can go
off and
live their
lives.
In verse
4
But if a
widow has
children or
grandchildren
these should
learn first
of all
to put
their religion
into practice
by caring
for their
own family
and so
repaying
their parents
and grandparents
for this
is pleasing
to God.
This is a
really strong
statement.
Your mother
father
or your
grandmother
or your
aging
parents
or
grandparents
they are
your own
family
says Paul
and you
owe it
to them
to care
for them
and to
provide
for them
if they
should fall
into a
position
of real
need.
So yes
the church
should
provide
for widows
who are
in need
but that
familial
responsibility
falls first
to their
own
sons and
daughters
and not
just sons
and daughters
but even
grandchildren
and the
language here
is so
strong
Paul uses
that language
of repayment
of returning
compensation
which means
that all
of us
owe our
parents
a great
debt.
They brought
us into
the world
they carried
us with
them
they provided
for our
needs when
we were
utterly
dependent
and helpless
it was
a huge
life
sacrifice
of love
that was
given to
all of us
by our
parents.
Now I
know that
there's
exceptions
to that
there are
some who
haven't had
good parents
some who
have grown
up in
foster care
or been
adopted
but on
the general
on the
whole
we owe
our parents
a great
debt.
Paul says
that we
should put
our religion
into practice
we should
put our
faith
into action
by caring
for
our
parents
by returning
to them
what they
gave to
us
for this
is pleasing
to God
it is
God's
will
that you
look after
your parents
and grandparents
just as they
looked after
you
when you
were dependent
that's what
family is
about
it's about
commitment
loyalty
it's about
self-sacrificial
love
for one
another
that's what
your mom
and dad
had for
you
for almost
two decades
of your
life
when you
were a
dependent
in need
and so
a follower
of Christ
ought to
do the
same
for their
mother
or father
who comes
to that
place
of being
dependent
and in
need
we also
notice that
this instruction
presumes
that the
children
or maybe
one of the
grandchildren
are
believers
he says
the children
or the
grandchildren
should learn
first of all
to put
their religion
into practice
by caring
for their
own
family
and so
if a widow
doesn't have
believing
children
or
grandchildren
and those
children
they do
have
are
not
willing
to help
them out
well that's
a place
where a
widow
is truly
in need
that's a
place where
the church
needs to
step in
and provide
for them
as a
family
ought to
whether it's
finances
or a
place to
live
or meals
or whatever
and this
responsibility
to care for
mom in her
old age
is part of
a larger
principle
that applies
to family
in general
Paul goes
on a few
verses down
in verse
8
and he makes
this
another
strong statement
he says
anyone who
does not
provide for
their
relatives
and especially
for their
own household
has denied
the faith
and is worse
than an
unbeliever
so it's
relevant to
more than
just looking
after mom
in her
old age
yes it
would apply
to dad
too
it would
include
for those
of us
who are
parents
providing
for the
needs
of our
children
those of
our own
family
our own
household
this is
the
responsibility
of every
parent
to provide
for the
needs
of our
own
households
our own
families
which means
that those
parents who
who work
outside the
home
to put
an income
in the
bank
to provide
for their
families
you're doing
the will
of God
when you
go to
work
it's
the will
of God
that both
men and
women
provide
for our
families
that we
look after
our
relatives
and the
warning
here
couldn't
be any
stronger
he says
if you
fail to
do this
for your
mother
your father
who's in
need
or for
your own
household
you have
denied
the faith
and are
worse
than an
unbeliever
so following
Jesus
and faith
in Jesus
it must
work itself
out in
caring
for one's
own
family
Paul says
give the
people these
instructions
so that no
one may be
open to
blame
verse 7
so how
do these
statements
apply to
you today
what's your
life situation
that you're
in right
now
do you
have aging
parents
that are
in need
of
assistance
do you
have
children
at home
before we
get to
any talk
of the
church
stepping
in to
regularly
meet
the
basic
needs
of
individuals
we
first
have
to
own
this
responsibility
each
of us
to our
own
families
but then
we can't
stop there
we must
go on
to
what we
already
read
in
verse
3
to
giving
proper
recognition
to those
who are
truly
in need
and much
of the
rest of
this
passage
is aimed
at helping
the church
minister to
these
widows
well
now in
our
church
today
we only
have
one
widow
so we're
going to
kind of
zoom out
a bit
and take
a larger
principle
here
but in
order to
do that
we kind
of have
to still
understand
the contours
of how
this applies
to widows
so we
see several
principles
emerge
here
first
we hear
Paul call
us to
really consider
the plight
of the
widow
this in
verse
5
he says
the widow
who is
really in
need
and left
all alone
puts her
hope
in God
and continues
night and
day to
pray and
to ask
God for
help
so Paul's
inviting us
to really
look at
and consider
what it's
like to
be a
widow
if she's
really in
need
if she's
all alone
with nobody
to help
her out
she's in
a desperate
situation
and the
picture he
paints
as a
person of
faith
in the
church
is what
we're
talking
about
she's
crying
out to
God
day and
night
asking
for help
so it's
not enough
for us
to just
ask the
question
of who's
a widow
in our
church
we have
to go
beyond
that
what is
it like
for them
to be
in that
situation
now let's
take a step
back and
consider the
larger
principle
here
who are
the needy
among us
not just
the widows
but needy
in other
ways
there's more
than one
kind of life
situation
that can
leave someone
in need
and desperate
praying
like this
praying to
God
day and
night
for help
what is it
like for
the person
among us
who has
a disability
a severe
disability
or who's
suffering with
debilitating
health issues
or chronic
pain
what's it
like for the
person whose
spouse has
badly mistreated
them
or abandoned
them
or the
person who's
been laid
off and
can't find
work
these are
not just
hypothetical
questions of
what to do
in these
situations
Paul's calling
us to really
know and
feel
what it's
like for
people in
our church
that are
in need
so that's
the first
principle here
as Christians
we are to
be deeply
sympathetic
to the
situation
of the
needy
among us
but then
Paul does
something
surprising
here
he lets us
know that
there's more
than one
kind of
widow
as we just
heard there's
the widow
who's really
in need
but then in
verse 6
there is
he says
but the
widow who
lives for
pleasure is
dead even
while she
lives
down in
verse 11
he goes
on and
says as
for younger
widows
do not
put them
on such
a list
for when
their sensual
desires overcome
their dedication
to Christ
they want
to marry
thus they
bring judgment
on themselves
because they
have broken
their first
pledge
besides
they get
into the
habit of
being idle
and going
about from
house to
house
and not
only do
they become
idlers
but also
busybodies
who talk
nonsense
saying things
they ought
not to
so I
counsel younger
widows
to marry
to have
children
to manage
their homes
and to give
the enemy
no opportunity
for slander
some have
in fact
already
turned away
to follow
Satan
so Paul
distinguishes
between two
kinds of
widows
there's the
widow who
is really
in need
and to be
put on the
list for
receiving
regular help
from the
church
she must
be at
least 60
years old
Paul says
in verse
9
but then
there are
also some
widows who
are given
to pleasure
sensuality
gossip
and who
with regular
financial
support
from the
church
would be
lazy
or idle
so in
this situation
being on
regular
church
support
is enabling
their bad
behavior
so there's a
second principle
here
we are to be
deeply sympathetic
to the situation
of the needy
among us
but we are to
be wise
to the reality
that some
will take
advantage
of the
church
and again
we must be
careful
to apply
this
not just
to widows
but to
anyone
who seems
to be
needy
now this
doesn't mean
that we
should always
be suspicious
or tight
fisted with
the church's
money
this doesn't
mean that we
should default
to being
judgmental
rather we
are to be
wise
and discerning
careful
and prudent
as we seek
to help
the needy
among us
there's at
least two
things that
are at
stake
the first
one we
see in
verse 14
Paul
counsels the
younger widows
to marry
to have
children
and to
manage
their homes
to give
the enemy
no opportunity
for slander
so if we
as a church
end up
by our
charity
enabling
people to
live
disreputable
lives
we're giving
the devil
an opening
to slander
us
and it
hurts the
good reputation
of the
church
so the
reputation
of the
church
is at
stake
and then
in verse
16
Paul says
if any
woman who
is a
believer
has
widows
in her
care
she should
continue
to help
them
and not
let the
church
be
burdened
with
them
so that
the church
can help
those widows
who are
really
in need
that word
burdened
reflects
what it's
like to
care for
somebody
who is
dependent
and in
need
and it's
not being
used negatively
to suggest
that those
people are
just a
burden
rather
it means
that looking
after somebody
who is
dependent
is a
heavy or
a weighty
responsibility
and so
if it's
possible
for an
individual
who has
been
caring
for several
needy
people
to continue
on with
that
that's
great
says
Paul
keep on
with that
ministry
to them
that will
in turn
alleviate
the weight
on the
church
so that
the church
can use
the resources
that they
have
to help
those who
have no
one
those who
are really
in need
so there's
two things
at stake
first
there's the
reputation
of the
church
which
really
does
reflect
on
Christ
I mean
people
are
looking
at
us
they're
getting
their
ideas
about
Jesus
from
us
and
what
we
do
and
second
there's
the
resources
of the
church
which
are
at
stake
they
may
they
are
limited
they
may
be
needed
by
some
so
we
don't
want
to
find
ourselves
in
a
place
where
we're
giving
them
to
people
who
don't
need
them
but
then
the
people
who
do
need
them
are
lacking
or
going
without
so
we
must
be
wise
and
we
must
be
careful
as
we
put
things
in
place
for
the
needy
among
us
but
again
this
is
not
an
excuse
to
do
nothing
for
those
who
are
really
in
need
among
us
if
we're
so
concerned
that
we
might
enable
the
bad
behavior
of
some
that
we
close
our
eyes
and
we
close
our
hearts
to
the
desperate
need
of
others
we
fail
some
members
in
the
family
and
so
Paul
gives
a bit
of a
framework
in
verses
9
and
10
I'll
just
read
it
he
says
no
widow
may be
put
on the
list
of
widows
unless
she's
over
60
has
been
faithful
to
her
husband
and
is
well
known
for
her
good
deeds
such
as
bringing
up
children
showing
hospitality
washing
the
feet
of the
Lord's
people
helping
those
in
trouble
and
devoting
herself
to
all
kinds
of
good
deeds
and
it's
maybe
implied
in
the
next
two
verses
11
and
12
that
here
at
this
time
they
had
the
widows
take
a
pledge
of
some
sort
to
remain
unmarried
we
don't
know
all
the
details
about
that
that's
kind
of
lost
in
history
to
us
today
there's
nothing
wrong
with
a
widow
remarrying
but
in
the
doing
so
they
were
breaking
this
pledge
that
they
had
made
and
so
to
avoid
having
widows
break
that
pledge
and
to
avoid
having
them
get
into
that
place
where
they
were
becoming
idle
busy
bodies
and
gossips
Paul
counsels
them
to
remarry
and
to
have
children
and
to
manage
their
homes
now
we
don't
have
a
list
of
widows
that
we
financially
support
as a
church
and
so
we
really
got
to
zoom
back
out
here
to
see
the
larger
principle
as we
apply
it
to
our
church
today
first
let's
talk
about
church
giving
in
general
our
regular
church
giving
I
mean
the
giving
that
our
church
does
to
others
the
financial
support
that we
have
for
families
missionaries
ministries
that
kind
of
thing
should
be
to
people
who
are
of
proven
character
people
who
have
proved
faithful
and
trustworthy
people
who
are well
known
for
their
good
deeds
who
are
truly
serving
the
Lord's
people
or
meeting
the
needs
of
those
who
are
in
trouble
because
who
we
regularly
support
financially
as a
church
says
something
about
who
we
are
as
a
church
it
says
something
about
who
Jesus
is
to
the
outsiders
looking
in
so
it's
good
for
us
to
periodically
review
the
missionaries
the
ministries
that
we are
giving
to
regularly
second
let's
talk
about
regularly
supporting
the
neediest
members
of our
church
family
currently
we don't
have a
list
of any
kind
with
anyone
on it
for this
we don't
have any
written
requirements
for what
how
you would
even
get on
such
a
list
if
we
had
one
so
we're
not
in
danger
as a
church
of
enabling
bad
behavior
like we
see
here
or of
giving
to
people
who
shouldn't
be
receiving
it
but
is it
possible
that
we're
in
danger
of
completely
overlooking
people
among
us
who
are
in
need
who
could
right
now
be
benefiting
and
right
now
are
crying
out
to
God
for
help
sometimes
we
assume
that
people
will
simply
ask
when
they
need
help
or
we
assume
that
because
a
person
has
family
in
the
church
that
they're
looked
after
but
is it
possible
that
there
are
some
people
in
our
church
whose
lives
right
now
look
like
this
they're
feeling
desperate
they're
crying
out to
God
day and
night
asking
for
help
feeling
alone
there's
a real
social
stigma
involved
with
asking
for
help
especially
financial
help
people
sometimes
feel
ashamed
or
deeply
embarrassed
to
make
their
need
known
and
as
we
can
all
see
the
prices
of
everything
are
going
up
food
clothing
housing
it's
all
increasing
very
quickly
is
every
member
of our
church
family
provided
for
is
every
member
of our
church
family
provided
for
and if
anyone
should
need
help
what's
our
plan
to
look
after
that
brother
or
sister
in
Christ
who
is
truly
in
need
I
think
probably
seems
that we
should
have
something
in
place
some
guidelines
or
policies
to
ensure
that we
are
able
to
meet
the
need
in
a
timely
manner
and
also
safeguard
the
resources
of the
church
and be
faithful
with
them
these
guidelines
in
verse
9
work
for
widows
but
what
about
other
forms
of
real
need
within
the
family
I'm
reminded
of
the
words
that
Luke
wrote
as he
described
the early
church
in
Jerusalem
Acts
chapter
2
verse
42
he
describes
the
church
he
says
they
devoted
themselves
to
the
apostles
teaching
and
to
fellowship
to
the
breaking
of
bread
and
to
prayer
everyone
was
filled
with
awe
at
the
many
wonders
and
signs
performed
by
the
apostles
all
the
believers
were
together
and
had
everything
in
common
they
sold
property
and
possessions
to
give
to
anyone
who
had
need
and
then
a
little
later
on
in
the
book
of
Acts
chapter
4
a
similar
kind
of
description
all
the
believers
were
one
in
heart
and
mind
no
one
claimed
that
any
of
their
possessions
was
their
had
with
great
power
the
apostles
continued
to
testify
to
the
resurrection
of
the
Lord
Jesus
and
God's
grace
was
so
powerfully
at
work
in
them
all
that
there
were
no
needy
persons
among
them
for
from
time
to
time
those
who
owned
land
or
houses
sold
them
brought
the
money
from
the
sales
and
put
it
at
the
apostles
feet
and
it
was
distributed
to
anyone
who
had
need
now
we're
not
going
to
get
into
a
philosophical
discussion
here
about
capitalism
and
socialism
and
property
ownership
this was
a unique
time
in the
church
and
not
long
after
this
the
Jerusalem
church
was
scattered
and
what
remained
of it
went
underground
so
these
words
describe
how
it
went
then
not
necessarily
how
it
should
be
for
all
churches
and
all
places
for
all
time
but
there's
still
something
here
for
our
hearts
why
were
some
selling
properties
and
possessions
because
they saw
other
believers
brothers
and
sisters
who
were
in
real
need
this
is
an
amazing
statement
God's
grace
was so
powerfully
at work
in them
all
that
there
were
no
needy
persons
among
them
God's
generosity
his
abundant
giving
nature
was so
powerfully
at work
in them
that
it
was
leading
them
to
be
generous
and
to
give
abundantly
towards
the
needs
that
they
were
seeing
in
the
church
and
I
wonder
is
this
statement
true
of
our
church
today
is
God's
grace
so
powerfully
at work
in us
all
of us
that
there
are
no
needy
persons
among
us
or
are
there
truly
needy
persons
among
us
that
we
have
been
failing
to
help
so
let's
do
some
prayer
and
let's
talk
to
one
another
let's
check
in
with
each
other
and
see
how
everyone's
doing
family
finances
I know
are
somewhat
private
matters
but
for
those
of
us
who
belong
to
Christ
we
are
family
so
we
can
have
those
kinds
of
conversations
and
talk
with
each
other
about
these
things
let's
pray
now
and
ask
the
Lord
to
be
at
work
in
us
Father
in
heaven
we
thank
you
for
this
reminder
from
your
word
about
how
we
should
be
as
a
family
in
the
church
and
I
pray
that
these
words
would
really
stir
our
hearts
and
turn
us
toward
one
another
in
love
and
concern
and
I
pray
that
this
would
be
true
I
pray
that
your
grace
would
work
so
powerfully
in
us
that
there
would
be
no
needy
person
among
us
that
everybody
in
the
family
would
be
taken
care
of
make
us
that
kind
of
a
church
Lord
so
that
we
will
bring
glory
to
your
name
we
ask
in
Jesus
name
Amen