WEBVTT

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 Good morning, Watermark. The scripture reading today comes from Ephesians chapters 5 and 6.

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 Starting in chapter 5, verse 21, we read,

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 Submit to one another out of reference for Christ.

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 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.

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 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church,

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 his body, and is himself its saviour.

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 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

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 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,

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 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,

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 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing,

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 that she might be holy and without blemish.

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 In the same way, husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.

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 He who loves his wife loves himself.

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 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it,

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 just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.

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 Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife,

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 and the two shall become one flesh.

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 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.

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 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself,

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 and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

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 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

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 Honor your father and mother.

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 This is the first commandment with a promise,

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 that it might go well with you, and that you may live long in the land.

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 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger,

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 but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

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 Bondservants, obey your earthly masters with fear and trembling,

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 with a sincere heart as you would Christ,

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 not by the way of eye service, as people pleasers,

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 but as bondservants of Christ.

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 Doing the will of God from the heart,

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 rendering service with a good will as to the Lord and not to man,

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 knowing that whatever good anyone does,

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 this he will receive back from the Lord,

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 whether he is a bondservant or is free.

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 Masters, do the same to them,

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 and stop your threatening,

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 knowing that he who is both their master and yours is in heaven,

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 and that there is no partiality with him.

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 This is the word of God.

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 Great. Thank you, Iris.

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 Well, let's pray together as we come to this passage.

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 Heavenly Father, Lord Jesus Christ, Holy Spirit,

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 we, as we say each week, we come to encounter your grace.

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 God, in a world that is so starved of grace,

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 God, in a world that is dog-eat-dog,

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 and everyone's fighting for their own rights and positions and privileges,

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 God, we come to you this morning to receive what only you can give us,

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 grace for our weary hearts.

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 And Father, as we look at this passage, this challenging passage,

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 we pray that you will speak to us.

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 We pray that you will make clear to us your heart.

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 You'll both call us and flood our hearts with your goodness and your grace.

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 And so, Jesus, come and have your way, we pray.

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 Spirit of God, come and help me to make clear this passage,

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 but help us to see your word and to encounter you in your word.

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 We pray this in your wonderful name.

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 Amen.

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 Well, we're continuing our study in the book of Ephesians.

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 And the book of Ephesians is really all about the church

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 and God's cosmic plan for the church.

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 And the first couple of chapters, especially chapters 1 to 3,

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 kind of look at this idea from heaven's perspective.

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 It's kind of like you sit it up in heaven, see it in heaven,

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 and you look at God's plan for the church from the perspective of heaven.

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 And then the second half of the book looks at the same theme,

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 the church and God's plan for the church, from a very earthly perspective.

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 And it kind of talks about our relationships and forgiving one another

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 and be humble towards one another.

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 And it kind of looks at the church from this very earthly perspective.

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 Well, today we come to this very famous and somewhat controversial passage of Scripture

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 because it starts off with these sensational words, right?

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 Wives, submit to your husbands.

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 I mean, is there anything more controversial than that?

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 You may be here this morning and you're exploring Christianity

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 or trying to make sense of the Bible and the Christian faith.

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 And just by hearing the first few words of our passage,

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 you may start to be second-guessing your exploration already,

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 thinking, what on earth have I done?

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 The Christian church has enough problems of its making, as it is, right?

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 We've got sex abuse scandals, financial abuse scandals,

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 church leaders saying one thing and doing another thing,

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 the hypocrisy and duplicity.

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 The church has got enough problems of its own making.

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 And here in black and white, in the words of Scripture,

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 we have these words that seem so out of date, so anachronistic,

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 so from another world, oppressive and unjust.

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 And what are we meant to make of these words in Scripture?

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 Well, let me offer a couple of ways that we can think about it.

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 The first way we could think about it is to say,

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 listen, clearly the Bible in general and the Apostle Paul specifically

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 is chauvinistic, misogynistic, has a terrible view of women,

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 and we should just completely disregard it.

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 I mean, nobody should even take this stuff seriously.

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 Could be one way of thinking about it.

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 We could be slightly more charitable and think,

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 well, listen, Paul's obviously writing in a cultural context,

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 a time in history.

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 We know that the Roman-Greco world, the Jewish world,

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 had a pretty low view of women and slaves and children in general.

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 Right?

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 Every Jewish man would wake up in the morning and pray and say,

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 God, I thank you, God of heaven, you've not made me a woman,

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 a Gentile or a slave.

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 So we know that that was the culture of the time.

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 And so maybe what Paul is writing is true and applicable in some ways in his culture,

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 but he's letting his culture influence his writings and his biases.

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 And so maybe if you want to be very charitable,

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 it was kind of true for them, but it's certainly not true for us.

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 In the words of Oprah Winfrey, it was his version of truth, not our truth.

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 Okay?

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 One way.

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 But I want to suggest another way to look at it.

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 And it's actually the way that Christians have kind of read their Bible for the last 2,000 years.

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 And that is to say that somehow, in a mysterious way,

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 behind the words of the Apostle Paul here,

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 with his culture and his personality and his own context,

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 somehow is the hand of the risen God,

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 such that what we have before us is not merely the words of Paul,

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 it is the words of Paul,

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 but somehow, in a mysterious way,

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 we have the words of God to us

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 through the writings of this man called Paul.

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 And if we were to approach the Bible in that way,

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 I think we would find two things.

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 We would find that these words are

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 probably deeply challenging,

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 but also, in some strange way,

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 good and beneficial.

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 And the reason I say that is because

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 that shouldn't surprise us,

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 because when you hear the words of God,

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 who is so different from us,

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 and so distinctive from us,

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 we shouldn't be surprised that his words aren't challenging to us.

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 Because if you come to a God who is so different from us,

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 and who has eternal perspective,

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 and knows the beginning from the end,

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 and sees things so differently from us,

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 we shouldn't be surprised

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 that his views confront and challenge our worldview.

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 You know, if you serve a God

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 who only ever agrees with you,

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 and whose worldview is exactly the same as yours,

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 chances are we're serving a God of our own making,

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 a God that we've made up in our own mind,

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 because he just agrees with us.

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 But if we were to come to a God

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 who is real and true,

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 who is different and distinctive from us,

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 we shouldn't be surprised that his words sometimes challenge our worldview

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 and our thinking.

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 But at the same time,

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 we should also expect

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 that somehow,

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 what he has to say is good,

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 and that his words don't cramp our lives,

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 but they actually expand our lives.

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 They're not here to restrict us,

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 they're here to liberate us.

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 And the reason we should expect that

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 is because Jesus didn't come just to start a new religion.

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 Jesus came to give hope to the weary and the frustrated.

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 Jesus came to a world that is starved of grace,

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 and starved of life,

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 and starved of hope.

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 And he said,

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 I've come to give hope and life and grace

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 to people that are starved of it.

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 And so somehow,

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 if these words really are from God,

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 we should expect they should both challenge us,

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 but also in some ways,

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 liberate us.

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 Okay.

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 So with that introduction,

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 let's think about this passage together.

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 And I hope you've got your Bible in front of you.

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 If you've got a Bible,

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 make sure you open up.

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 We're going to be looking at a lot of the scriptures

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 on your phone or on the bulletin.

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 So how should we think about this passage today?

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 Well,

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 clearly this passage is made up of

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 three sets of relationships.

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 In chapter 5,

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 verse 21,

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 or 22 to 33,

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 Paul speaks to husbands and wives.

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 In chapter 6,

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 verse 1 to 4,

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 he talks to parents and children.

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 And in chapter 6,

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 verse 5 to 9,

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 he talks to employers and employees.

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 So three sets of relationships.

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 But they're not just three sets of relationships.

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 Anyone will notice straight away.

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 They're three sets of relationships

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 that have an inherent power imbalance.

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 Right?

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 In each one of these relationships,

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 there's one party that inherently,

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 by the culture of the day

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 and the way they're set up,

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 has more power,

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 more authority,

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 is in a position of privilege,

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 you could say.

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 So there's an inherent power imbalance

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 in these relationships.

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 Now,

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 you may think that the third pair

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 is different from the first two.

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 The first two are clearly in the home,

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 husbands and wives,

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 parents and children.

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 But the third pair

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 is actually meant for the home as well.

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 In the ancient world,

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 in Roman times,

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 much like actually many homes

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 in Hong Kong today,

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 homes,

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 households,

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 consisted of husbands and wives,

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 parents and children.

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 In fact,

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 often three or four generations

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 of parents and children.

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 But also,

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 servants,

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 masters,

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 traders,

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 those that worked in the home,

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 all of them would live

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 within the household.

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 And so what we have here

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 is three sets of relationships

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 in the household

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 and Paul's wanting to write to us

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 to show us

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 how the gospel of grace

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 affects relationships

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 when there's a power imbalance

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 and particularly

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 the relationships in the household.

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 Okay?

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 So that's what's going on here.

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 So Paul wants us

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 to read these three sections together

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 even though the first section

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 is the most controversial

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 and gets the most attention.

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 Paul's designed them

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 that they have a symbiotic relationship

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 or there's a correlation

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 with all three

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 and he wants us

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 to read them together.

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 And so how should we think

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 about these relationships?

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 And today we're going to see

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 four things.

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 Okay?

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 So the first one is this.

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 God's ordered design

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 for these relationships.

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 God's ordered design.

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 We live in a world

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 which is both longing

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 for good leadership

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 and yet at the same time

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 is so skeptical about it.

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 If you think of every sphere

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 of society,

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 public and private,

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 companies,

00:12:43.860 --> 00:12:44.399
 in government,

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 in homes,

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 in churches,

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 civil society,

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 we long for good leadership.

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 Our kids have just gone

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 to a new school

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 in August this year.

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 A school which apparently

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 four or five,

00:12:58.960 --> 00:12:59.659
 six years ago

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 had a lot of strife,

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 a lot of fighting,

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 a lot of disunity,

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 PTA,

00:13:06.320 --> 00:13:07.019
 owners,

00:13:07.279 --> 00:13:07.720
 staff,

00:13:07.840 --> 00:13:08.899
 a lot of disunity

00:13:08.899 --> 00:13:09.480
 in the school.

00:13:10.039 --> 00:13:10.960
 And a new headmaster

00:13:10.960 --> 00:13:12.279
 came in four years ago

00:13:12.279 --> 00:13:13.519
 and the school

00:13:13.519 --> 00:13:14.600
 is a radically

00:13:14.600 --> 00:13:15.440
 different place.

00:13:15.840 --> 00:13:16.919
 It's a place of joy.

00:13:17.440 --> 00:13:18.279
 It's a place that staff

00:13:18.279 --> 00:13:19.080
 love to teach.

00:13:19.500 --> 00:13:20.360
 There's such unity.

00:13:21.000 --> 00:13:21.700
 The benefits

00:13:21.700 --> 00:13:22.899
 of good leadership.

00:13:23.879 --> 00:13:24.799
 We all long

00:13:24.799 --> 00:13:25.639
 for good leadership

00:13:25.639 --> 00:13:26.519
 and yet

00:13:26.519 --> 00:13:27.740
 we all seem

00:13:27.740 --> 00:13:28.539
 to be skeptical

00:13:28.539 --> 00:13:29.200
 about it

00:13:29.200 --> 00:13:29.539
 because

00:13:29.539 --> 00:13:30.879
 I think it's safe

00:13:30.879 --> 00:13:31.159
 to say

00:13:31.159 --> 00:13:31.860
 all of us

00:13:31.860 --> 00:13:32.879
 have seen

00:13:32.879 --> 00:13:33.819
 and experienced

00:13:33.819 --> 00:13:34.919
 the opposite.

00:13:35.480 --> 00:13:36.319
 Bad leadership.

00:13:36.500 --> 00:13:37.679
 Leadership that uses

00:13:37.679 --> 00:13:38.500
 and abuses

00:13:38.500 --> 00:13:39.779
 those that they are

00:13:39.779 --> 00:13:40.480
 meant to be leading.

00:13:41.699 --> 00:13:42.620
 Now as I said

00:13:42.620 --> 00:13:43.360
 a few minutes ago,

00:13:43.439 --> 00:13:44.099
 these passages

00:13:44.099 --> 00:13:45.079
 are meant to be read

00:13:45.079 --> 00:13:45.759
 together

00:13:45.759 --> 00:13:46.980
 and obviously

00:13:46.980 --> 00:13:47.939
 the first section

00:13:47.939 --> 00:13:49.000
 gets the most attention

00:13:49.000 --> 00:13:50.379
 because it's the most contentions.

00:13:50.899 --> 00:13:51.879
 But the point here

00:13:51.879 --> 00:13:52.899
 is that leadership

00:13:52.899 --> 00:13:54.299
 is part of God's

00:13:54.299 --> 00:13:55.219
 good design

00:13:55.219 --> 00:13:56.360
 for the world

00:13:56.360 --> 00:13:57.599
 and specifically

00:13:57.599 --> 00:13:58.719
 for the household.

00:13:59.539 --> 00:14:01.079
 Now it's important

00:14:01.079 --> 00:14:01.439
 to note

00:14:01.439 --> 00:14:02.379
 that what scripture

00:14:02.379 --> 00:14:03.319
 is not saying

00:14:03.319 --> 00:14:03.980
 is that there's

00:14:03.980 --> 00:14:04.659
 an inherent

00:14:04.659 --> 00:14:06.819
 difference in value

00:14:06.819 --> 00:14:07.719
 or dignity

00:14:07.719 --> 00:14:08.819
 or worth

00:14:08.819 --> 00:14:09.759
 of the different

00:14:09.759 --> 00:14:10.839
 members of the household.

00:14:11.699 --> 00:14:12.419
 Clearly Paul

00:14:12.419 --> 00:14:13.599
 is not saying

00:14:13.599 --> 00:14:15.079
 that men

00:14:15.079 --> 00:14:15.939
 are more valuable

00:14:15.939 --> 00:14:16.500
 than women.

00:14:17.240 --> 00:14:18.360
 Fathers are more valuable

00:14:18.360 --> 00:14:19.099
 than children.

00:14:20.459 --> 00:14:21.059
 Masters

00:14:21.059 --> 00:14:22.339
 have an inherent

00:14:22.339 --> 00:14:23.000
 worth

00:14:23.000 --> 00:14:23.699
 that is greater

00:14:23.699 --> 00:14:24.360
 than those

00:14:24.360 --> 00:14:25.199
 that work in their home.

00:14:25.879 --> 00:14:26.319
 Throughout

00:14:26.319 --> 00:14:27.379
 Ephesians

00:14:27.379 --> 00:14:28.219
 and the New Testament

00:14:28.219 --> 00:14:29.399
 Paul and Jesus

00:14:29.399 --> 00:14:30.360
 made clear

00:14:30.360 --> 00:14:31.000
 that that's not

00:14:31.000 --> 00:14:31.559
 what he's saying.

00:14:32.559 --> 00:14:33.039
 Remember how

00:14:33.039 --> 00:14:33.819
 in chapter 2

00:14:33.819 --> 00:14:34.399
 we looked at

00:14:34.399 --> 00:14:35.159
 Ephesians

00:14:35.159 --> 00:14:35.439
 where

00:14:35.439 --> 00:14:36.620
 there's this

00:14:36.620 --> 00:14:41.659
 animosity

00:14:41.659 --> 00:14:42.459
 between the Jews

00:14:42.459 --> 00:14:43.279
 and the Gentiles.

00:14:43.879 --> 00:14:44.539
 Remember how

00:14:44.539 --> 00:14:45.799
 if you're a Jewish family

00:14:45.799 --> 00:14:47.059
 your son brings home

00:14:47.059 --> 00:14:47.840
 a Gentile

00:14:47.840 --> 00:14:48.779
 girlfriend

00:14:48.779 --> 00:14:49.299
 and says

00:14:49.299 --> 00:14:49.819
 mom and dad

00:14:49.819 --> 00:14:50.720
 we're going to get married.

00:14:51.199 --> 00:14:51.720
 You don't throw

00:14:51.720 --> 00:14:52.819
 a wedding feast

00:14:52.819 --> 00:14:53.899
 you throw a funeral.

00:14:54.120 --> 00:14:54.319
 Right?

00:14:54.779 --> 00:14:55.519
 Because in the culture

00:14:55.519 --> 00:14:56.279
 of the first century

00:14:56.279 --> 00:14:57.720
 your son was dead to you.

00:14:57.720 --> 00:14:59.279
 That was the tension

00:14:59.279 --> 00:14:59.920
 between Jews

00:14:59.920 --> 00:15:00.600
 and Gentiles

00:15:00.600 --> 00:15:01.440
 and what does

00:15:01.440 --> 00:15:01.879
 Paul write

00:15:01.879 --> 00:15:02.620
 in chapter 2?

00:15:03.360 --> 00:15:04.360
 Jesus has made

00:15:04.360 --> 00:15:05.180
 both Jews

00:15:05.180 --> 00:15:06.040
 and Gentiles

00:15:06.040 --> 00:15:06.560
 one

00:15:06.560 --> 00:15:08.040
 breaking down

00:15:08.040 --> 00:15:08.580
 in his flesh

00:15:08.580 --> 00:15:09.540
 the dividing wall

00:15:09.540 --> 00:15:10.200
 of hostility.

00:15:11.279 --> 00:15:11.779
 Or in Galatians

00:15:11.779 --> 00:15:12.379
 chapter 3

00:15:12.379 --> 00:15:12.960
 Paul writes

00:15:12.960 --> 00:15:13.220
 and says

00:15:13.220 --> 00:15:14.100
 now in Christ

00:15:14.100 --> 00:15:14.840
 there is neither

00:15:14.840 --> 00:15:15.980
 Jew nor Gentile

00:15:15.980 --> 00:15:17.540
 slave or free

00:15:17.540 --> 00:15:19.440
 male or female

00:15:19.440 --> 00:15:20.480
 for you are all

00:15:20.480 --> 00:15:22.019
 one in Christ Jesus.

00:15:23.259 --> 00:15:23.940
 And think of how

00:15:23.940 --> 00:15:25.580
 Jesus treats children

00:15:25.580 --> 00:15:26.200
 in his day.

00:15:26.780 --> 00:15:27.400
 In a time

00:15:27.400 --> 00:15:27.700
 when everyone

00:15:27.700 --> 00:15:28.400
 wanted to push

00:15:28.400 --> 00:15:29.200
 children aside

00:15:29.200 --> 00:15:29.960
 and have no

00:15:29.960 --> 00:15:30.960
 social capital

00:15:30.960 --> 00:15:32.000
 Jesus says

00:15:32.000 --> 00:15:32.960
 bring the children

00:15:32.960 --> 00:15:33.480
 to me.

00:15:34.560 --> 00:15:34.980
 Well think about

00:15:34.980 --> 00:15:35.700
 how the fact that

00:15:35.700 --> 00:15:37.120
 Jesus' ministry

00:15:37.120 --> 00:15:38.000
 in many ways

00:15:38.000 --> 00:15:38.900
 was built

00:15:38.900 --> 00:15:40.380
 by women.

00:15:41.340 --> 00:15:41.840
 Women were the

00:15:41.840 --> 00:15:42.760
 first eyewitnesses

00:15:42.760 --> 00:15:43.540
 to his resurrection.

00:15:44.540 --> 00:15:45.420
 The first witnesses

00:15:45.420 --> 00:15:46.140
 to the fact that

00:15:46.140 --> 00:15:46.840
 Christ had risen

00:15:46.840 --> 00:15:47.360
 from the dead.

00:15:48.340 --> 00:15:49.000
 The women

00:15:49.000 --> 00:15:50.080
 were many of the ones

00:15:50.080 --> 00:15:50.940
 that funded

00:15:50.940 --> 00:15:51.980
 Jesus' ministry.

00:15:51.980 --> 00:15:53.840
 And in the first

00:15:53.840 --> 00:15:54.360
 century

00:15:54.360 --> 00:15:55.899
 women flocked

00:15:55.899 --> 00:15:56.480
 to Christ

00:15:56.480 --> 00:15:57.100
 and to the gospel.

00:15:57.259 --> 00:15:57.680
 The churches

00:15:57.680 --> 00:15:58.960
 were full of women

00:15:58.960 --> 00:16:00.240
 much like they are

00:16:00.240 --> 00:16:00.620
 today.

00:16:01.720 --> 00:16:02.500
 And so it's

00:16:02.500 --> 00:16:03.300
 almost impossible

00:16:03.300 --> 00:16:04.300
 to think that

00:16:04.300 --> 00:16:05.460
 Paul and Jesus

00:16:05.460 --> 00:16:06.200
 in the New Testament

00:16:06.200 --> 00:16:07.139
 is somehow saying

00:16:07.139 --> 00:16:08.360
 there's an inherent

00:16:08.360 --> 00:16:10.480
 value or dignity

00:16:10.480 --> 00:16:11.360
 or worth

00:16:11.360 --> 00:16:12.120
 difference

00:16:12.120 --> 00:16:13.120
 between these

00:16:13.120 --> 00:16:13.720
 relationships.

00:16:15.039 --> 00:16:15.980
 What God

00:16:15.980 --> 00:16:16.500
 is saying here

00:16:16.500 --> 00:16:17.480
 what Paul is saying

00:16:17.480 --> 00:16:17.940
 is that he's

00:16:17.940 --> 00:16:18.500
 established

00:16:18.500 --> 00:16:19.320
 an ordered

00:16:19.320 --> 00:16:20.000
 design

00:16:20.000 --> 00:16:21.060
 that like the

00:16:21.060 --> 00:16:21.779
 body that is

00:16:21.779 --> 00:16:22.480
 different parts

00:16:22.480 --> 00:16:22.799
 and different

00:16:22.799 --> 00:16:23.179
 members

00:16:23.179 --> 00:16:23.559
 and different

00:16:23.559 --> 00:16:24.019
 roles.

00:16:24.819 --> 00:16:25.379
 Part of his

00:16:25.379 --> 00:16:26.120
 design involves

00:16:26.120 --> 00:16:26.600
 the elements

00:16:26.600 --> 00:16:27.379
 of leadership

00:16:27.379 --> 00:16:28.620
 and followership.

00:16:29.639 --> 00:16:30.000
 And so look

00:16:30.000 --> 00:16:30.620
 what he says here.

00:16:30.740 --> 00:16:31.919
 Wives respect

00:16:31.919 --> 00:16:32.819
 and follow

00:16:32.819 --> 00:16:33.439
 your husband's

00:16:33.439 --> 00:16:33.819
 leadership

00:16:33.819 --> 00:16:34.319
 in the home.

00:16:35.299 --> 00:16:36.220
 Children obey

00:16:36.220 --> 00:16:37.039
 and respect

00:16:37.039 --> 00:16:37.799
 your parents'

00:16:37.939 --> 00:16:38.379
 authority.

00:16:39.839 --> 00:16:41.079
 Employees respect

00:16:41.079 --> 00:16:41.879
 and obey

00:16:41.879 --> 00:16:43.579
 your employer's

00:16:43.579 --> 00:16:44.059
 leadership

00:16:44.059 --> 00:16:45.000
 and authority.

00:16:46.379 --> 00:16:47.419
 And all three

00:16:47.419 --> 00:16:48.279
 of these relationships

00:16:48.279 --> 00:16:49.519
 he says do this

00:16:49.519 --> 00:16:51.100
 for this is the

00:16:51.100 --> 00:16:51.500
 reason.

00:16:52.179 --> 00:16:52.919
 Verse 23

00:16:52.919 --> 00:16:53.639
 he says

00:16:53.639 --> 00:16:54.139
 in the first

00:16:54.139 --> 00:16:54.539
 instance

00:16:54.539 --> 00:16:55.159
 this is how

00:16:55.159 --> 00:16:55.600
 God has

00:16:55.600 --> 00:16:56.259
 arranged the

00:16:56.259 --> 00:16:56.600
 home.

00:16:57.579 --> 00:16:58.019
 In the second

00:16:58.019 --> 00:16:58.340
 instance

00:16:58.340 --> 00:16:59.579
 6 verse 1

00:16:59.579 --> 00:16:59.860
 he says

00:16:59.860 --> 00:17:00.519
 simply this

00:17:00.519 --> 00:17:01.299
 is right.

00:17:02.419 --> 00:17:02.860
 And in 6

00:17:02.860 --> 00:17:03.319
 verse 8

00:17:03.319 --> 00:17:03.620
 he says

00:17:03.620 --> 00:17:04.180
 do this

00:17:04.180 --> 00:17:04.700
 knowing that

00:17:04.700 --> 00:17:06.220
 whatever good

00:17:06.220 --> 00:17:07.019
 anyone does

00:17:07.019 --> 00:17:07.819
 he will receive

00:17:07.819 --> 00:17:08.440
 back from the

00:17:08.440 --> 00:17:08.680
 Lord.

00:17:09.759 --> 00:17:10.359
 And so Paul

00:17:10.359 --> 00:17:11.099
 says here

00:17:11.099 --> 00:17:12.059
 in the home

00:17:12.059 --> 00:17:12.619
 God has

00:17:12.619 --> 00:17:13.279
 established

00:17:13.279 --> 00:17:14.539
 this design.

00:17:14.680 --> 00:17:15.279
 He's created

00:17:15.279 --> 00:17:16.240
 a design order

00:17:16.240 --> 00:17:16.880
 and part

00:17:16.880 --> 00:17:17.140
 of that

00:17:17.140 --> 00:17:17.779
 design order

00:17:17.779 --> 00:17:18.700
 there's an

00:17:18.700 --> 00:17:19.380
 element of

00:17:19.380 --> 00:17:19.980
 leadership.

00:17:21.859 --> 00:17:22.059
 And he

00:17:22.059 --> 00:17:23.039
 says for

00:17:23.039 --> 00:17:23.720
 flourishing

00:17:23.720 --> 00:17:24.519
 homes follow

00:17:24.519 --> 00:17:25.240
 the maker's

00:17:25.240 --> 00:17:25.880
 design.

00:17:26.859 --> 00:17:26.980
 Okay.

00:17:27.500 --> 00:17:28.400
 God's ordered

00:17:28.400 --> 00:17:29.299
 design for the

00:17:29.299 --> 00:17:29.559
 world.

00:17:30.579 --> 00:17:31.059
 Now the

00:17:31.059 --> 00:17:31.799
 problem is

00:17:31.799 --> 00:17:32.279
 the problem

00:17:32.279 --> 00:17:32.660
 is not

00:17:32.660 --> 00:17:33.599
 the design

00:17:33.599 --> 00:17:34.319
 the problem

00:17:34.319 --> 00:17:34.740
 is the way

00:17:34.740 --> 00:17:35.099
 that that

00:17:35.099 --> 00:17:35.640
 design is

00:17:35.640 --> 00:17:36.299
 worked out.

00:17:36.779 --> 00:17:36.940
 Right.

00:17:37.620 --> 00:17:38.339
 And so

00:17:38.339 --> 00:17:39.420
 I'm sure

00:17:39.420 --> 00:17:40.019
 almost all

00:17:40.019 --> 00:17:40.579
 of us here

00:17:40.579 --> 00:17:41.599
 could say

00:17:41.599 --> 00:17:42.160
 that the

00:17:42.160 --> 00:17:42.859
 problem is

00:17:42.859 --> 00:17:43.759
 that design

00:17:43.759 --> 00:17:44.880
 seldom reflects

00:17:44.880 --> 00:17:45.900
 our reality.

00:17:46.240 --> 00:17:47.200
 How many

00:17:47.200 --> 00:17:47.579
 of us could

00:17:47.579 --> 00:17:48.099
 say that we

00:17:48.099 --> 00:17:48.700
 grew up in

00:17:48.700 --> 00:17:49.380
 homes where

00:17:49.380 --> 00:17:50.140
 we experienced

00:17:50.140 --> 00:17:51.220
 this servant

00:17:51.220 --> 00:17:51.940
 hearted

00:17:51.940 --> 00:17:52.660
 leadership.

00:17:53.099 --> 00:17:53.240
 Right.

00:17:53.759 --> 00:17:54.980
 We're humble

00:17:54.980 --> 00:17:55.819
 servant hearted

00:17:55.819 --> 00:17:56.440
 leaders not

00:17:56.440 --> 00:17:57.799
 domineering not

00:17:57.799 --> 00:17:58.500
 angry and

00:17:58.500 --> 00:17:59.859
 frustrated no

00:17:59.859 --> 00:18:00.799
 harsh words

00:18:00.799 --> 00:18:02.180
 spoken no

00:18:02.180 --> 00:18:03.240
 moody husbands

00:18:03.240 --> 00:18:03.839
 or grumpy

00:18:03.839 --> 00:18:04.519
 fathers.

00:18:04.980 --> 00:18:05.220
 Right.

00:18:05.660 --> 00:18:06.660
 Just humble

00:18:06.660 --> 00:18:07.720
 servant hearted

00:18:07.720 --> 00:18:08.180
 leaders.

00:18:08.940 --> 00:18:09.200
 Anyone.

00:18:10.500 --> 00:18:11.440
 Wonderful if

00:18:11.440 --> 00:18:11.779
 you did.

00:18:12.400 --> 00:18:13.000
 You see the

00:18:13.000 --> 00:18:13.700
 problem is not

00:18:13.700 --> 00:18:14.920
 God's design.

00:18:15.120 --> 00:18:15.440
 It's the way

00:18:15.440 --> 00:18:15.740
 that the

00:18:15.740 --> 00:18:16.200
 design is

00:18:16.200 --> 00:18:16.820
 worked out

00:18:16.820 --> 00:18:17.860
 in reality.

00:18:18.940 --> 00:18:19.200
 And so

00:18:19.200 --> 00:18:19.980
 generally what

00:18:19.980 --> 00:18:20.500
 is our

00:18:20.500 --> 00:18:21.259
 experience?

00:18:22.160 --> 00:18:22.440
 Well our

00:18:22.440 --> 00:18:23.059
 experience is

00:18:23.059 --> 00:18:23.580
 something of

00:18:23.580 --> 00:18:24.160
 the opposite.

00:18:25.059 --> 00:18:25.640
 Our experience

00:18:25.640 --> 00:18:26.420
 is those in

00:18:26.420 --> 00:18:26.980
 positions of

00:18:26.980 --> 00:18:27.880
 power, those

00:18:27.880 --> 00:18:28.539
 in positions of

00:18:28.539 --> 00:18:29.900
 leadership using

00:18:29.900 --> 00:18:30.539
 their leadership

00:18:30.539 --> 00:18:31.279
 for their own

00:18:31.279 --> 00:18:32.620
 advantage to

00:18:32.620 --> 00:18:33.480
 serve themselves.

00:18:35.180 --> 00:18:35.940
 Don't raise

00:18:35.940 --> 00:18:36.519
 your hand,

00:18:36.840 --> 00:18:37.920
 okay, but just

00:18:37.920 --> 00:18:38.519
 in your heart

00:18:38.519 --> 00:18:39.259
 you can raise

00:18:39.259 --> 00:18:39.559
 your hand.

00:18:39.660 --> 00:18:40.120
 How many of

00:18:40.120 --> 00:18:41.200
 us have heard

00:18:41.200 --> 00:18:41.900
 words something

00:18:41.900 --> 00:18:43.299
 like this from

00:18:43.299 --> 00:18:44.180
 a father or a

00:18:44.180 --> 00:18:44.779
 husband or a

00:18:44.779 --> 00:18:45.080
 parent?

00:18:45.759 --> 00:18:46.500
 Can't I get a

00:18:46.500 --> 00:18:47.120
 little peace and

00:18:47.120 --> 00:18:47.980
 quiet around this

00:18:47.980 --> 00:18:48.420
 place?

00:18:49.060 --> 00:18:50.640
 Or after all

00:18:50.640 --> 00:18:51.539
 that I do for

00:18:51.539 --> 00:18:52.440
 you I think I

00:18:52.440 --> 00:18:53.160
 deserve a little

00:18:53.160 --> 00:18:54.019
 more respect in

00:18:54.019 --> 00:18:54.539
 this house.

00:18:55.539 --> 00:18:56.440
 Okay, don't

00:18:56.440 --> 00:18:57.200
 smile or nudge

00:18:57.200 --> 00:18:57.860
 your husbands or

00:18:57.860 --> 00:18:58.180
 anything.

00:18:59.960 --> 00:19:00.700
 You see generally

00:19:00.700 --> 00:19:01.420
 speaking the

00:19:01.420 --> 00:19:02.500
 problem is that

00:19:02.500 --> 00:19:03.900
 our hearts are

00:19:03.900 --> 00:19:04.860
 turned in on

00:19:04.860 --> 00:19:05.380
 ourselves.

00:19:06.240 --> 00:19:06.840
 And so we are

00:19:06.840 --> 00:19:07.519
 self-seeking.

00:19:08.620 --> 00:19:09.460
 Augustine said the

00:19:09.460 --> 00:19:09.960
 problem with

00:19:09.960 --> 00:19:10.779
 humanity is that

00:19:10.779 --> 00:19:11.600
 sin has caused

00:19:11.600 --> 00:19:12.299
 our hearts to

00:19:12.299 --> 00:19:12.940
 turn in on

00:19:12.940 --> 00:19:13.960
 ourselves and

00:19:13.960 --> 00:19:14.559
 so we become

00:19:14.559 --> 00:19:15.360
 self-serving,

00:19:15.500 --> 00:19:16.140
 self-seeking.

00:19:16.880 --> 00:19:17.299
 And so the

00:19:17.299 --> 00:19:18.460
 operating system

00:19:18.460 --> 00:19:19.200
 of our heart

00:19:19.200 --> 00:19:19.820
 has got a

00:19:19.820 --> 00:19:20.940
 virus in it

00:19:20.940 --> 00:19:22.160
 and that is

00:19:22.160 --> 00:19:22.960
 out of order

00:19:22.960 --> 00:19:23.299
 now.

00:19:23.620 --> 00:19:24.019
 And so what

00:19:24.019 --> 00:19:24.559
 that means is

00:19:24.559 --> 00:19:25.279
 that humanity

00:19:25.279 --> 00:19:26.220
 as a result of

00:19:26.220 --> 00:19:27.100
 fall and sin,

00:19:27.779 --> 00:19:28.580
 humanity is a

00:19:28.580 --> 00:19:29.120
 way of taking

00:19:29.120 --> 00:19:30.180
 God's ordered

00:19:30.180 --> 00:19:30.799
 desire and

00:19:30.799 --> 00:19:31.440
 turning on its

00:19:31.440 --> 00:19:32.900
 head so that

00:19:32.900 --> 00:19:33.539
 now we want to

00:19:33.539 --> 00:19:34.400
 serve ourselves

00:19:34.400 --> 00:19:34.860
 rather than

00:19:34.860 --> 00:19:35.220
 others.

00:19:35.600 --> 00:19:36.059
 We want to

00:19:36.059 --> 00:19:36.779
 seek our own

00:19:36.779 --> 00:19:37.740
 welfare rather than

00:19:37.740 --> 00:19:38.360
 the welfare of

00:19:38.360 --> 00:19:38.680
 others.

00:19:39.100 --> 00:19:39.600
 We become

00:19:39.600 --> 00:19:40.559
 self-serving

00:19:40.559 --> 00:19:41.420
 rather than

00:19:41.420 --> 00:19:42.160
 others-serving.

00:19:42.940 --> 00:19:43.840
 And so the

00:19:43.840 --> 00:19:44.559
 book of James,

00:19:44.680 --> 00:19:45.180
 James writes

00:19:45.180 --> 00:19:45.620
 and he says

00:19:45.620 --> 00:19:46.720
 this, he says

00:19:46.720 --> 00:19:47.539
 we are lured

00:19:47.539 --> 00:19:48.420
 and enticed

00:19:48.420 --> 00:19:49.299
 by our own

00:19:49.299 --> 00:19:50.340
 desires that

00:19:50.340 --> 00:19:51.019
 grow and

00:19:51.019 --> 00:19:51.740
 develop into

00:19:51.740 --> 00:19:52.840
 sin and

00:19:52.840 --> 00:19:53.340
 when sin

00:19:53.340 --> 00:19:53.860
 grows and

00:19:53.860 --> 00:19:54.539
 develops it

00:19:54.539 --> 00:19:55.120
 leads into

00:19:55.120 --> 00:19:55.940
 death and

00:19:55.940 --> 00:19:56.500
 destruction.

00:19:57.500 --> 00:19:58.259
 And we see

00:19:58.259 --> 00:19:58.820
 that, right?

00:19:59.720 --> 00:20:00.200
 Death and

00:20:00.200 --> 00:20:00.820
 destruction of

00:20:00.820 --> 00:20:01.440
 relationships,

00:20:02.480 --> 00:20:02.840
 death and

00:20:02.840 --> 00:20:03.460
 destruction of

00:20:03.460 --> 00:20:04.180
 peace in the

00:20:04.180 --> 00:20:04.460
 home,

00:20:05.680 --> 00:20:06.019
 death and

00:20:06.019 --> 00:20:07.019
 destruction of

00:20:07.019 --> 00:20:07.940
 joy,

00:20:08.559 --> 00:20:09.559
 of hope,

00:20:09.559 --> 00:20:11.359
 grace,

00:20:12.240 --> 00:20:13.079
 of dignity,

00:20:13.980 --> 00:20:14.960
 of security,

00:20:15.960 --> 00:20:17.019
 of flourishing,

00:20:17.980 --> 00:20:19.200
 of radiance.

00:20:20.539 --> 00:20:21.019
 God has

00:20:21.019 --> 00:20:21.659
 designed that

00:20:21.659 --> 00:20:22.299
 humanity, we

00:20:22.299 --> 00:20:23.119
 serve one

00:20:23.119 --> 00:20:23.740
 another, we

00:20:23.740 --> 00:20:24.460
 love one

00:20:24.460 --> 00:20:24.940
 another, we

00:20:24.940 --> 00:20:25.659
 use our

00:20:25.659 --> 00:20:27.299
 positions and

00:20:27.299 --> 00:20:27.839
 the gifts that

00:20:27.839 --> 00:20:28.339
 God has given

00:20:28.339 --> 00:20:29.139
 for the welfare

00:20:29.139 --> 00:20:29.839
 of one another,

00:20:30.000 --> 00:20:30.819
 but rather we

00:20:30.819 --> 00:20:32.039
 are takers rather

00:20:32.039 --> 00:20:32.919
 than givers.

00:20:33.759 --> 00:20:34.740
 And we tend to

00:20:34.740 --> 00:20:35.559
 use and abuse

00:20:35.559 --> 00:20:36.079
 one another.

00:20:37.179 --> 00:20:37.559
 And so just

00:20:37.559 --> 00:20:37.980
 look at our

00:20:37.980 --> 00:20:38.639
 passage here.

00:20:39.200 --> 00:20:39.940
 Look at how he

00:20:39.940 --> 00:20:40.899
 says, maybe start

00:20:40.899 --> 00:20:41.419
 at the bottom,

00:20:41.839 --> 00:20:42.700
 6 verse 9,

00:20:43.000 --> 00:20:43.619
 let's see how

00:20:43.619 --> 00:20:44.440
 sin works its

00:20:44.440 --> 00:20:44.799
 way out.

00:20:44.879 --> 00:20:45.539
 6 verse 9,

00:20:45.639 --> 00:20:46.059
 what is the

00:20:46.059 --> 00:20:46.899
 temptation that

00:20:46.899 --> 00:20:48.220
 employers have

00:20:48.220 --> 00:20:48.980
 towards those in

00:20:48.980 --> 00:20:49.579
 their employment?

00:20:50.500 --> 00:20:51.019
 Threatening,

00:20:51.639 --> 00:20:52.240
 demanding,

00:20:52.899 --> 00:20:53.599
 intimidating.

00:20:54.419 --> 00:20:55.039
 Historians tell

00:20:55.039 --> 00:20:55.700
 us that in the

00:20:55.700 --> 00:20:56.759
 Roman-Greican

00:20:56.759 --> 00:20:57.179
 world,

00:20:57.799 --> 00:20:59.460
 masters would

00:20:59.460 --> 00:21:00.099
 use three

00:21:00.099 --> 00:21:01.000
 strategies to

00:21:01.000 --> 00:21:01.839
 get what they

00:21:01.839 --> 00:21:02.359
 wanted from

00:21:02.359 --> 00:21:03.079
 their employees.

00:21:03.579 --> 00:21:03.960
 They would

00:21:03.960 --> 00:21:04.639
 threaten them to

00:21:04.639 --> 00:21:05.319
 beat them,

00:21:05.859 --> 00:21:06.139
 they would

00:21:06.139 --> 00:21:06.720
 threaten them with

00:21:06.720 --> 00:21:07.539
 sexual abuse,

00:21:08.200 --> 00:21:08.779
 or thirdly,

00:21:08.819 --> 00:21:09.019
 they would

00:21:09.019 --> 00:21:09.559
 threaten to

00:21:09.559 --> 00:21:10.339
 sell one

00:21:10.339 --> 00:21:10.759
 member of

00:21:10.759 --> 00:21:11.519
 the family to

00:21:11.519 --> 00:21:12.399
 another family

00:21:12.399 --> 00:21:12.899
 on the other

00:21:12.899 --> 00:21:13.379
 side of the

00:21:13.379 --> 00:21:14.200
 Roman Empire to

00:21:14.200 --> 00:21:15.159
 split up the

00:21:15.159 --> 00:21:15.559
 families.

00:21:16.299 --> 00:21:16.940
 So I'm a

00:21:16.940 --> 00:21:17.500
 master, you're

00:21:17.500 --> 00:21:17.940
 my servant,

00:21:18.019 --> 00:21:18.480
 you're not doing

00:21:18.480 --> 00:21:19.000
 what I want,

00:21:19.319 --> 00:21:19.960
 I'll threaten

00:21:19.960 --> 00:21:20.379
 you, I'll

00:21:20.379 --> 00:21:21.079
 sexually abuse

00:21:21.079 --> 00:21:21.519
 you, I'll

00:21:21.519 --> 00:21:21.960
 sell your

00:21:21.960 --> 00:21:22.480
 children to

00:21:22.480 --> 00:21:22.799
 slavery.

00:21:24.079 --> 00:21:24.579
 What does

00:21:24.579 --> 00:21:25.139
 Paul say?

00:21:25.679 --> 00:21:26.359
 That's not the

00:21:26.359 --> 00:21:26.779
 way that the

00:21:26.779 --> 00:21:27.559
 gospel operates.

00:21:28.099 --> 00:21:28.639
 Look at 6

00:21:28.639 --> 00:21:29.200
 verse 4,

00:21:29.480 --> 00:21:30.039
 how does sin

00:21:30.039 --> 00:21:30.599
 operate in

00:21:30.599 --> 00:21:31.200
 families with

00:21:31.200 --> 00:21:31.799
 parents and

00:21:31.799 --> 00:21:33.019
 fathers, getting

00:21:33.019 --> 00:21:34.279
 angry, provoking

00:21:34.279 --> 00:21:35.019
 children to

00:21:35.019 --> 00:21:35.419
 anger?

00:21:36.259 --> 00:21:36.819
 And how does it

00:21:36.819 --> 00:21:37.500
 affect marriage

00:21:37.500 --> 00:21:39.039
 spouses looking

00:21:39.039 --> 00:21:39.819
 after themselves,

00:21:40.000 --> 00:21:40.779
 seeking their own

00:21:40.779 --> 00:21:41.539
 interests, thinking

00:21:41.539 --> 00:21:42.400
 about what is good

00:21:42.400 --> 00:21:43.559
 for them.

00:21:44.519 --> 00:21:45.240
 And so rather than

00:21:45.240 --> 00:21:46.000
 God's ordered

00:21:46.000 --> 00:21:46.980
 design, what we

00:21:46.980 --> 00:21:48.519
 have is humanity's

00:21:48.519 --> 00:21:49.799
 disordered world.

00:21:51.720 --> 00:21:52.519
 Friends, is there

00:21:52.519 --> 00:21:54.359
 anybody here that

00:21:54.359 --> 00:21:55.319
 has not seen and

00:21:55.319 --> 00:21:56.380
 experienced the

00:21:56.380 --> 00:21:57.319
 brokenness and the

00:21:57.319 --> 00:21:58.460
 depravity of sin in

00:21:58.460 --> 00:21:59.460
 our lives and in our

00:21:59.460 --> 00:22:00.160
 homes and our

00:22:00.160 --> 00:22:00.960
 marriages and our

00:22:00.960 --> 00:22:01.640
 families and our

00:22:01.640 --> 00:22:02.920
 parents and our

00:22:02.920 --> 00:22:03.420
 relationships?

00:22:03.420 --> 00:22:03.560
 relationships?

00:22:04.560 --> 00:22:04.900
 And so the

00:22:04.900 --> 00:22:05.640
 question is this,

00:22:05.640 --> 00:22:06.700
 how should members

00:22:06.700 --> 00:22:07.440
 of the household

00:22:07.440 --> 00:22:08.320
 relate to one

00:22:08.320 --> 00:22:08.560
 another?

00:22:09.200 --> 00:22:09.880
 On the one hand,

00:22:09.940 --> 00:22:10.480
 we have God's

00:22:10.480 --> 00:22:11.440
 design, God's

00:22:11.440 --> 00:22:12.640
 order, but we

00:22:12.640 --> 00:22:13.500
 also see how sin

00:22:13.500 --> 00:22:14.519
 has corrupted this

00:22:14.519 --> 00:22:15.680
 order so that it's

00:22:15.680 --> 00:22:16.580
 twisted on its head.

00:22:17.440 --> 00:22:18.500
 And so is there a

00:22:18.500 --> 00:22:19.300
 way for us to

00:22:19.300 --> 00:22:21.000
 somehow come back to

00:22:21.000 --> 00:22:21.759
 God's ordered

00:22:21.759 --> 00:22:23.300
 design that will

00:22:23.300 --> 00:22:24.259
 get the intended

00:22:24.259 --> 00:22:25.240
 results that God

00:22:25.240 --> 00:22:25.660
 planned?

00:22:26.240 --> 00:22:27.259
 Is there a way for

00:22:27.259 --> 00:22:28.160
 us to go back to

00:22:28.160 --> 00:22:29.240
 God's design without

00:22:29.240 --> 00:22:30.980
 resorting to using and

00:22:30.980 --> 00:22:31.920
 abusing each other,

00:22:32.099 --> 00:22:33.440
 domineering, provoking

00:22:33.440 --> 00:22:34.400
 and intimidating?

00:22:36.079 --> 00:22:37.000
 Well, the answer

00:22:37.000 --> 00:22:37.880
 that Ephesians gives

00:22:37.880 --> 00:22:41.120
 us is this, seek God's

00:22:41.120 --> 00:22:42.960
 design with gospel

00:22:42.960 --> 00:22:44.779
 saturated humility.

00:22:46.319 --> 00:22:47.539
 Embrace God's good

00:22:47.539 --> 00:22:49.039
 order with gospel

00:22:49.039 --> 00:22:50.720
 saturated humility.

00:22:52.180 --> 00:22:54.079
 Let's see how that

00:22:54.079 --> 00:22:54.640
 plays out.

00:22:55.160 --> 00:22:55.920
 You see, Paul's not

00:22:55.920 --> 00:22:58.039
 saying, well, we know

00:22:58.039 --> 00:22:58.880
 that people have just

00:22:58.880 --> 00:22:59.920
 used their positions of

00:22:59.920 --> 00:23:00.720
 leadership, their own

00:23:00.720 --> 00:23:01.120
 advantage.

00:23:01.380 --> 00:23:02.420
 Let's just scrap the

00:23:02.420 --> 00:23:03.720
 system and start again.

00:23:03.900 --> 00:23:04.000
 Right?

00:23:04.039 --> 00:23:04.680
 That's not going to

00:23:04.680 --> 00:23:04.839
 work.

00:23:04.920 --> 00:23:06.339
 Let's just come up with

00:23:06.339 --> 00:23:07.140
 something altogether new.

00:23:07.779 --> 00:23:08.640
 He doesn't say that.

00:23:09.140 --> 00:23:10.539
 But he also doesn't say,

00:23:11.039 --> 00:23:12.600
 well, sorry ladies,

00:23:12.839 --> 00:23:13.819
 sorry children, sorry

00:23:13.819 --> 00:23:14.839
 servants, that's just the

00:23:14.839 --> 00:23:16.380
 way it is, just suck it

00:23:16.380 --> 00:23:16.620
 up.

00:23:18.180 --> 00:23:19.819
 Paul says, friends, you

00:23:19.819 --> 00:23:20.860
 see this, the Bible

00:23:20.860 --> 00:23:22.240
 neither advocates for

00:23:22.240 --> 00:23:23.180
 old-fashioned

00:23:23.180 --> 00:23:24.360
 traditionalism and

00:23:24.360 --> 00:23:26.440
 patriarchy, nor

00:23:26.440 --> 00:23:28.140
 neither does it argue

00:23:28.140 --> 00:23:29.120
 for liberal

00:23:29.119 --> 00:23:30.259
 egalitarianism.

00:23:30.679 --> 00:23:31.739
 The Bible says there's

00:23:31.739 --> 00:23:33.739
 a third way, which is

00:23:33.739 --> 00:23:35.179
 gospel-shaped humility

00:23:35.179 --> 00:23:36.759
 that seeks the interest

00:23:36.759 --> 00:23:38.159
 of the other person

00:23:38.159 --> 00:23:39.399
 rather than myself.

00:23:40.339 --> 00:23:41.519
 And what Paul says here

00:23:41.519 --> 00:23:42.839
 is he shows the only

00:23:42.839 --> 00:23:45.139
 way, the only way that

00:23:45.139 --> 00:23:46.399
 you can follow God's

00:23:46.399 --> 00:23:47.839
 design without using

00:23:47.839 --> 00:23:49.439
 and abusing people in

00:23:49.439 --> 00:23:50.559
 our lives and our

00:23:50.559 --> 00:23:52.319
 homes, the only way to

00:23:52.319 --> 00:23:53.159
 accomplish God's

00:23:53.159 --> 00:23:54.739
 intention is if the

00:23:54.739 --> 00:23:56.179
 gospel of grace and the

00:23:56.180 --> 00:23:57.200
 person of the Lord

00:23:57.200 --> 00:23:58.779
 Jesus Christ and the

00:23:58.779 --> 00:23:59.980
 majesty of the gospel

00:23:59.980 --> 00:24:01.580
 is deeply at work in

00:24:01.580 --> 00:24:02.720
 our hearts and in our

00:24:02.720 --> 00:24:03.120
 homes.

00:24:04.080 --> 00:24:05.039
 Paul says that if you

00:24:05.039 --> 00:24:06.299
 take your eyes off of

00:24:06.299 --> 00:24:07.960
 Christ and the gospel,

00:24:08.160 --> 00:24:09.779
 or worse still, if you

00:24:09.779 --> 00:24:11.060
 pay lip service to

00:24:11.060 --> 00:24:12.320
 Christ and the gospel,

00:24:12.799 --> 00:24:13.759
 but it's not deeply

00:24:13.759 --> 00:24:15.180
 shaping our hearts and

00:24:15.180 --> 00:24:16.799
 our lives, what will

00:24:16.799 --> 00:24:18.279
 happen is we'll take a

00:24:18.279 --> 00:24:19.299
 scripture like this and

00:24:19.299 --> 00:24:21.220
 we'll weaponize it against

00:24:21.220 --> 00:24:22.180
 those in our homes.

00:24:22.180 --> 00:24:24.740
 And friends, if we

00:24:24.740 --> 00:24:26.080
 forget Christ and the

00:24:26.080 --> 00:24:27.860
 gospel, a passage of

00:24:27.860 --> 00:24:28.759
 scripture like this can

00:24:28.759 --> 00:24:30.420
 become a weapon to use

00:24:30.420 --> 00:24:31.880
 against those to prop

00:24:31.880 --> 00:24:32.640
 yourself up.

00:24:33.200 --> 00:24:34.600
 But when the gospel

00:24:34.600 --> 00:24:36.220
 pierces our hearts, this

00:24:36.220 --> 00:24:37.019
 scripture is meant to be

00:24:37.019 --> 00:24:38.259
 a sword that will pierce

00:24:38.259 --> 00:24:39.799
 our own hearts and bring

00:24:39.799 --> 00:24:41.519
 us to our knees to say,

00:24:41.680 --> 00:24:42.900
 oh God, I need your

00:24:42.900 --> 00:24:44.019
 mercy to be such a

00:24:44.019 --> 00:24:45.519
 husband, such a father,

00:24:46.120 --> 00:24:47.039
 such a leader in my

00:24:47.039 --> 00:24:47.299
 home.

00:24:48.580 --> 00:24:49.539
 Does that make any

00:24:49.539 --> 00:24:49.880
 sense?

00:24:49.880 --> 00:24:50.240
 Okay.

00:24:53.240 --> 00:24:54.460
 So let's see how Paul

00:24:54.460 --> 00:24:55.060
 does this.

00:24:56.380 --> 00:24:57.720
 In this passage, Paul

00:24:57.720 --> 00:24:59.760
 addresses both parties in

00:24:59.760 --> 00:25:00.320
 the relationship.

00:25:00.440 --> 00:25:01.120
 And the first thing he

00:25:01.120 --> 00:25:02.240
 does is he calls for

00:25:02.240 --> 00:25:04.580
 volunteered followership.

00:25:05.760 --> 00:25:07.040
 Look at the way that

00:25:07.040 --> 00:25:09.100
 Paul speaks to the

00:25:09.100 --> 00:25:09.940
 parties in the

00:25:09.940 --> 00:25:10.880
 relationship that you

00:25:10.880 --> 00:25:12.480
 could say have no

00:25:12.480 --> 00:25:13.760
 power, no social

00:25:13.760 --> 00:25:14.320
 capital.

00:25:15.500 --> 00:25:16.280
 Look at how he speaks

00:25:16.280 --> 00:25:17.600
 to wives, children, and

00:25:17.600 --> 00:25:18.160
 employees.

00:25:18.160 --> 00:25:20.340
 And he calls them to

00:25:20.340 --> 00:25:22.980
 follow or to respect

00:25:22.980 --> 00:25:24.880
 the other member of the

00:25:24.880 --> 00:25:25.340
 relationship.

00:25:25.540 --> 00:25:26.720
 But he asks them to do

00:25:26.720 --> 00:25:29.019
 so not coercively, but

00:25:29.019 --> 00:25:29.900
 voluntarily.

00:25:30.860 --> 00:25:31.960
 Doing so out of

00:25:31.960 --> 00:25:32.860
 submission to Christ.

00:25:32.960 --> 00:25:33.940
 Look at what he says in

00:25:33.940 --> 00:25:35.840
 5 verse 22.

00:25:36.680 --> 00:25:37.680
 It says, wives, submit to

00:25:37.680 --> 00:25:39.940
 your own husbands as to

00:25:39.940 --> 00:25:40.660
 the Lord.

00:25:41.420 --> 00:25:42.660
 Look at 6 verse 1.

00:25:43.300 --> 00:25:44.500
 Children, obey your

00:25:44.500 --> 00:25:46.140
 parents in the Lord.

00:25:46.140 --> 00:25:48.200
 Look at 6 verse 5.

00:25:49.540 --> 00:25:51.280
 Bond servants, obey your

00:25:51.280 --> 00:25:53.100
 earthly masters as you

00:25:53.100 --> 00:25:55.140
 would Christ, 6 verse 6,

00:25:55.520 --> 00:25:56.759
 as bond servants of

00:25:56.759 --> 00:25:59.220
 Jesus Christ, verse 7, as

00:25:59.220 --> 00:26:00.980
 to the Lord and not to

00:26:00.980 --> 00:26:01.280
 men.

00:26:03.380 --> 00:26:04.660
 Paul's not saying, he

00:26:04.660 --> 00:26:05.420
 doesn't write to him, he

00:26:05.420 --> 00:26:07.540
 says, listen, men, I want

00:26:07.540 --> 00:26:08.360
 you to get your women,

00:26:08.520 --> 00:26:10.200
 children, and servants in

00:26:10.200 --> 00:26:11.000
 order, right?

00:26:11.580 --> 00:26:12.920
 That's not what he does.

00:26:13.600 --> 00:26:14.360
 We're going to see in a

00:26:14.359 --> 00:26:15.439
 minute what Paul does say

00:26:15.439 --> 00:26:17.240
 to the men, but what he

00:26:17.240 --> 00:26:18.399
 does say is he doesn't

00:26:18.399 --> 00:26:20.719
 give them any room to

00:26:20.719 --> 00:26:21.939
 control or manipulate

00:26:21.939 --> 00:26:22.979
 those in his home.

00:26:23.819 --> 00:26:25.399
 What Paul does is he does

00:26:25.399 --> 00:26:26.039
 something that is

00:26:26.039 --> 00:26:28.119
 culturally, extravagantly

00:26:28.119 --> 00:26:30.539
 out of order, completely

00:26:30.539 --> 00:26:31.740
 culturally inappropriate.

00:26:32.579 --> 00:26:35.399
 He writes to the ladies

00:26:35.399 --> 00:26:37.439
 and the children and the

00:26:37.439 --> 00:26:39.699
 servants in the church, and

00:26:39.700 --> 00:26:41.680
 he asks them to, of their

00:26:41.680 --> 00:26:43.779
 own self-will, to volunteer

00:26:43.779 --> 00:26:46.660
 their followership to the

00:26:46.660 --> 00:26:47.380
 leaders in their home.

00:26:48.100 --> 00:26:48.900
 Culturally, it is

00:26:48.900 --> 00:26:50.460
 completely inappropriate to

00:26:50.460 --> 00:26:51.880
 write to another man's

00:26:51.880 --> 00:26:52.840
 wife, another man's

00:26:52.840 --> 00:26:53.960
 children, or another man's

00:26:53.960 --> 00:26:54.319
 servants.

00:26:55.299 --> 00:26:56.600
 Peter O'Brien says this was

00:26:56.600 --> 00:26:58.080
 shockingly outrageous.

00:26:59.460 --> 00:27:01.340
 And yet, he writes them and

00:27:01.340 --> 00:27:03.100
 he doesn't instruct them or

00:27:03.100 --> 00:27:04.080
 tell them what to do.

00:27:04.559 --> 00:27:05.539
 Paul's not sending a

00:27:05.539 --> 00:27:06.539
 communique from head

00:27:06.539 --> 00:27:06.900
 office.

00:27:06.900 --> 00:27:08.420
 He's not throwing the

00:27:08.420 --> 00:27:09.180
 rule book at them.

00:27:09.620 --> 00:27:10.800
 He's appealing to their

00:27:10.800 --> 00:27:12.580
 own self-will to volunteer

00:27:12.580 --> 00:27:14.900
 their followership to their

00:27:14.900 --> 00:27:16.000
 husbands, fathers, and

00:27:16.000 --> 00:27:16.360
 masters.

00:27:17.240 --> 00:27:19.019
 Look at 6 verse 5 with me.

00:27:20.620 --> 00:27:22.360
 The bond servants, the

00:27:22.360 --> 00:27:24.620
 employees of the household,

00:27:25.960 --> 00:27:26.880
 were the people with the

00:27:26.880 --> 00:27:28.860
 least social capital in the

00:27:28.860 --> 00:27:29.160
 church.

00:27:29.440 --> 00:27:30.780
 They had almost no social

00:27:30.780 --> 00:27:31.180
 capital.

00:27:31.860 --> 00:27:33.120
 If there's one group of

00:27:33.120 --> 00:27:33.920
 people he could have

00:27:33.920 --> 00:27:34.960
 instructed and told them

00:27:34.960 --> 00:27:35.680
 what to do, this is

00:27:35.680 --> 00:27:36.560
 probably the one he could

00:27:36.559 --> 00:27:37.179
 have got away with.

00:27:37.200 --> 00:27:37.819
 And look at how he

00:27:37.819 --> 00:27:39.019
 writes there, how he

00:27:39.019 --> 00:27:39.960
 appeals to their hearts.

00:27:40.539 --> 00:27:41.919
 He says, obey your

00:27:41.919 --> 00:27:43.200
 earthly masters with a

00:27:43.200 --> 00:27:45.379
 sincere heart as you

00:27:45.379 --> 00:27:47.339
 would Christ, not by way

00:27:47.339 --> 00:27:49.000
 of eye service as people

00:27:49.000 --> 00:27:50.539
 pleases, as bond

00:27:50.539 --> 00:27:52.419
 servants of Christ, doing

00:27:52.419 --> 00:27:53.839
 the will of God from the

00:27:53.839 --> 00:27:55.740
 heart, rendering service

00:27:55.740 --> 00:27:57.720
 with a good will as to the

00:27:57.720 --> 00:27:58.779
 Lord and not to men.

00:27:59.659 --> 00:28:00.700
 Paul's not issuing a

00:28:00.700 --> 00:28:02.039
 directive or a command

00:28:02.039 --> 00:28:02.339
 here.

00:28:02.339 --> 00:28:06.220
 He's calling these people to

00:28:06.220 --> 00:28:08.019
 volunteer their followership.

00:28:08.879 --> 00:28:10.639
 In a way, Paul's actually

00:28:10.639 --> 00:28:13.079
 asking them to follow Christ

00:28:13.079 --> 00:28:14.759
 and out of their followership of

00:28:14.759 --> 00:28:16.899
 Christ to let that overflow in

00:28:16.899 --> 00:28:18.099
 their relationships in the home.

00:28:19.599 --> 00:28:22.240
 I remember when I was 23 years

00:28:22.240 --> 00:28:23.980
 old, I think Claire and I were

00:28:23.980 --> 00:28:25.619
 either engaged and married or had

00:28:25.619 --> 00:28:26.459
 just got married.

00:28:27.000 --> 00:28:28.259
 It was my first job out of

00:28:28.259 --> 00:28:31.200
 university, my first year of

00:28:31.200 --> 00:28:33.279
 working, and I was working for

00:28:33.279 --> 00:28:34.720
 somebody in our church.

00:28:35.240 --> 00:28:36.799
 We were both deacons in the

00:28:36.799 --> 00:28:37.140
 church.

00:28:37.339 --> 00:28:38.680
 I knew him pretty well.

00:28:38.799 --> 00:28:39.879
 We were kind of friends.

00:28:41.019 --> 00:28:42.460
 And he was my boss.

00:28:43.859 --> 00:28:45.200
 And, you know, that meant there

00:28:45.200 --> 00:28:46.200
 were certain liberties and

00:28:46.200 --> 00:28:47.339
 things I could get away with.

00:28:49.099 --> 00:28:50.859
 And I remember one morning I was

00:28:50.859 --> 00:28:52.440
 having my daily devotions before

00:28:52.440 --> 00:28:54.119
 work, and I read this passage in

00:28:54.119 --> 00:28:55.759
 1 Timothy chapter 6, and it

00:28:55.759 --> 00:28:57.039
 almost says the same thing.

00:28:57.039 --> 00:28:59.119
 It says, if you're working for a

00:28:59.119 --> 00:29:01.339
 believing boss, don't work less

00:29:01.339 --> 00:29:02.799
 hard, work doubly hard.

00:29:04.119 --> 00:29:05.619
 And I was so challenged and

00:29:05.619 --> 00:29:05.960
 convicted.

00:29:06.079 --> 00:29:07.119
 I went to work that day, and I

00:29:07.119 --> 00:29:10.220
 went to my boss, Jerome, and I

00:29:10.220 --> 00:29:11.299
 said, hey, Jerome, I've got a

00:29:11.299 --> 00:29:11.720
 confession.

00:29:12.579 --> 00:29:14.119
 I was reading my Bible this

00:29:14.119 --> 00:29:15.680
 morning, and I felt God speak to

00:29:15.680 --> 00:29:16.680
 me, and I haven't been working

00:29:16.680 --> 00:29:17.779
 for you as hard as I should have

00:29:17.779 --> 00:29:17.960
 been.

00:29:18.639 --> 00:29:20.379
 And I want to say I'm sorry, and I

00:29:20.379 --> 00:29:21.519
 want to change that, and I want to

00:29:21.519 --> 00:29:22.159
 put that right.

00:29:22.659 --> 00:29:24.339
 I want to be the very best employee

00:29:24.339 --> 00:29:25.480
 that you have in this company.

00:29:25.480 --> 00:29:27.539
 But do you see what happened

00:29:27.539 --> 00:29:27.759
 there?

00:29:28.339 --> 00:29:30.400
 It was God speaking to me, calling

00:29:30.400 --> 00:29:33.019
 to me to himself, and out of my

00:29:33.019 --> 00:29:34.960
 love for Christ, that actually

00:29:34.960 --> 00:29:36.120
 changed the way that I wanted to

00:29:36.120 --> 00:29:36.819
 relate to my boss.

00:29:37.440 --> 00:29:39.620
 It wasn't that Paul said, listen,

00:29:39.740 --> 00:29:41.360
 you're a Christian now, get your act

00:29:41.360 --> 00:29:41.680
 together.

00:29:42.339 --> 00:29:45.519
 It was God saying, work for me.

00:29:45.680 --> 00:29:47.559
 When you go into the office today, do

00:29:47.559 --> 00:29:49.140
 your work as if you're working for me.

00:29:49.819 --> 00:29:51.019
 What did that look like?

00:29:51.480 --> 00:29:53.059
 It meant that I wanted to work for my

00:29:53.059 --> 00:29:55.220
 boss doubly hard and twice as hard.

00:29:55.940 --> 00:29:57.519
 And that's what Paul is saying here.

00:29:57.960 --> 00:30:00.240
 He's saying, submit to Christ, that

00:30:00.240 --> 00:30:01.679
 your worship and your adoration of

00:30:01.679 --> 00:30:04.339
 Jesus play itself out in the

00:30:04.339 --> 00:30:06.179
 relationships that you have to your

00:30:06.179 --> 00:30:07.559
 husbands, your parents, and your

00:30:07.559 --> 00:30:07.960
 masters.

00:30:08.899 --> 00:30:09.039
 Okay?

00:30:11.059 --> 00:30:11.819
 Volunteer and fellowship.

00:30:12.099 --> 00:30:13.599
 Well, let's look at what Paul says to

00:30:13.599 --> 00:30:15.179
 the leaders, those that have social

00:30:15.179 --> 00:30:15.659
 capital.

00:30:17.279 --> 00:30:19.079
 Paul says that they, too, are not to

00:30:19.079 --> 00:30:20.659
 demand their rights, but to take up

00:30:20.660 --> 00:30:22.420
 their roles and responsibilities in

00:30:22.420 --> 00:30:23.259
 light of the gospel.

00:30:24.220 --> 00:30:25.720
 And so Paul calls those that are both

00:30:25.720 --> 00:30:28.880
 socially and legally who hold all the

00:30:28.880 --> 00:30:31.040
 cards, who have all the positions of

00:30:31.040 --> 00:30:32.240
 power and authority.

00:30:33.019 --> 00:30:35.060
 Paul asks them to do what with their

00:30:35.060 --> 00:30:35.980
 power and authority?

00:30:36.880 --> 00:30:40.800
 To lay it down in service to those that

00:30:40.800 --> 00:30:42.140
 they're called to lead.

00:30:44.180 --> 00:30:47.759
 Let's focus on husbands and wives

00:30:47.759 --> 00:30:49.320
 because it's the longest section in our

00:30:49.319 --> 00:30:49.839
 passage here.

00:30:49.919 --> 00:30:52.399
 So look at verses 25 to 33 with me.

00:30:53.079 --> 00:30:54.639
 It's a tricky passage to understand

00:30:54.639 --> 00:30:56.000
 because Paul kind of talks about

00:30:56.000 --> 00:30:57.500
 husbands and wives, and then he talks

00:30:57.500 --> 00:30:59.359
 about Christ and the church, and

00:30:59.359 --> 00:31:01.399
 sometimes he swaps in between mid

00:31:01.399 --> 00:31:01.819
 sentence.

00:31:01.980 --> 00:31:02.659
 You're kind of not sure.

00:31:02.720 --> 00:31:03.980
 Is he talking about husbands and

00:31:03.980 --> 00:31:05.159
 wives or is he talking about Christ and

00:31:05.159 --> 00:31:05.579
 the church?

00:31:06.019 --> 00:31:07.399
 But that's, of course, the point.

00:31:07.980 --> 00:31:10.159
 The point is husbands are meant to

00:31:10.159 --> 00:31:12.019
 love as Christ loves the church.

00:31:12.119 --> 00:31:13.259
 And so look at what he says here.

00:31:13.980 --> 00:31:16.200
 Husbands, love your wives.

00:31:16.799 --> 00:31:17.740
 Okay, that's pretty good.

00:31:17.740 --> 00:31:19.559
 Nothing controversial there.

00:31:20.599 --> 00:31:23.519
 Husbands, love your wives as Christ

00:31:23.519 --> 00:31:28.059
 loved the church and gave himself up for

00:31:28.059 --> 00:31:28.299
 her.

00:31:29.740 --> 00:31:32.279
 Well, how did Christ love the church?

00:31:33.019 --> 00:31:35.259
 What did that look like in practical

00:31:35.259 --> 00:31:35.960
 terms?

00:31:38.960 --> 00:31:41.099
 Friends, at Watermark, we talk about the

00:31:41.099 --> 00:31:43.819
 cross and the gospel a lot here.

00:31:43.819 --> 00:31:46.839
 And so it's easy to become very familiar

00:31:46.839 --> 00:31:49.099
 and blasé about Calvary.

00:31:50.480 --> 00:31:53.259
 How did Christ love the church?

00:31:54.799 --> 00:31:58.240
 Well, he allowed himself to be nailed to a

00:31:58.240 --> 00:31:59.000
 Roman cross.

00:32:00.740 --> 00:32:03.439
 You know, the Roman cross was the ultimate

00:32:03.439 --> 00:32:07.539
 act of brutality the world has ever known.

00:32:07.539 --> 00:32:13.099
 Within a few short years, the Romans outlawed

00:32:13.099 --> 00:32:16.079
 crucifixion because it was too inhumane to

00:32:16.079 --> 00:32:18.299
 subject any human being to it.

00:32:19.099 --> 00:32:21.720
 At the time of Jesus, it was reserved for

00:32:21.720 --> 00:32:24.700
 soldiers that had committed mutiny, slaves or

00:32:24.700 --> 00:32:25.119
 foreigners.

00:32:25.359 --> 00:32:28.159
 No Roman citizen would be subject to crucifixion.

00:32:29.099 --> 00:32:31.359
 And it wasn't only hanging on the cross, it was the

00:32:31.359 --> 00:32:33.500
 beatings and the floggings that went before it.

00:32:33.500 --> 00:32:36.920
 Josephus, a historian from the first century, said

00:32:36.920 --> 00:32:39.180
 that those that were crucified were subject to

00:32:39.180 --> 00:32:41.859
 such flogging and beating that their rib cages

00:32:41.859 --> 00:32:42.660
 were exposed.

00:32:43.680 --> 00:32:46.900
 Sometimes people's stomachs were ripped open so

00:32:46.900 --> 00:32:49.039
 that the entails would fall out before they even

00:32:49.039 --> 00:32:49.880
 got to the cross.

00:32:51.359 --> 00:32:56.859
 Jesus Christ loved the church by allowing himself

00:32:56.859 --> 00:33:03.259
 to be subject to the most brutal form of punishment

00:33:03.259 --> 00:33:05.679
 humanity has ever known.

00:33:07.159 --> 00:33:10.519
 And on the cross, that's from a human perspective and

00:33:10.519 --> 00:33:14.240
 from a divine perspective, Jesus Christ took upon himself

00:33:14.240 --> 00:33:19.219
 the full wrath of God for the punishment of the sins of

00:33:19.219 --> 00:33:22.719
 those who would entrust themselves to him.

00:33:22.720 --> 00:33:28.620
 Jesus Christ literally loved us to death.

00:33:29.799 --> 00:33:32.980
 And as the words of Sally Lloyd-Jones says, it wasn't the

00:33:32.980 --> 00:33:34.819
 nails that held him to the cross.

00:33:35.360 --> 00:33:38.339
 It was his love for you and for I.

00:33:40.240 --> 00:33:47.180
 And Paul writes to us and he says, husbands, love your wives as

00:33:47.180 --> 00:33:49.460
 Christ loved the church.

00:33:49.460 --> 00:33:52.440
 See what he's saying?

00:33:54.140 --> 00:33:57.600
 And so in addition to his profound love for us, why did he do

00:33:57.600 --> 00:33:57.740
 it?

00:33:57.840 --> 00:33:59.620
 Well, our text tells us.

00:33:59.680 --> 00:34:01.160
 Look at verse 26 with me.

00:34:02.319 --> 00:34:09.199
 Jesus went to the cross to take a broken, bruised humanity, his

00:34:09.199 --> 00:34:11.880
 bride, and what would he do with her?

00:34:12.280 --> 00:34:14.519
 That he might sanctify her.

00:34:14.599 --> 00:34:16.019
 That means purify her.

00:34:16.179 --> 00:34:18.840
 Make her beautiful and acceptable to God.

00:34:18.840 --> 00:34:22.800
 That he might cleanse her with washing of water and the word.

00:34:22.960 --> 00:34:26.620
 That means that he might flood her with the gospel that will so

00:34:26.620 --> 00:34:29.420
 change her that she will become changed.

00:34:29.780 --> 00:34:30.780
 Verse 27.

00:34:31.200 --> 00:34:35.680
 That he might present the church, his bride, to himself in splendor

00:34:35.680 --> 00:34:40.680
 or radiance without spot or wrinkle or any such thing that she

00:34:40.680 --> 00:34:42.980
 might be holy and without blemish.

00:34:43.400 --> 00:34:44.579
 So here's Paul's argument.

00:34:44.579 --> 00:34:50.880
 Jesus takes a church, which is you and I, with all our sinfulness and our

00:34:50.880 --> 00:34:55.980
 wickedness and our depravity and our self-centeredness, and he does something on

00:34:55.980 --> 00:35:03.079
 the cross so that one day when we are in eternity, we will be glorious and beautiful and radiant and

00:35:03.079 --> 00:35:05.599
 sinless and perfect forever.

00:35:05.599 --> 00:35:15.339
 He takes what is once less than perfect, and because of his love for us, he perfects us and presents us as

00:35:15.339 --> 00:35:17.480
 glorious and radiant and beautiful.

00:35:17.480 --> 00:35:27.059
 Jesus Christ, the king of the universe, uses his position and his authority for the one that he loves.

00:35:27.719 --> 00:35:35.400
 In order to see her become the perfect picture of what she's designed to be, but how sin had ruined her.

00:35:35.400 --> 00:35:45.820
 And now Paul says, husbands, that is what you are called to do for your wives and your children and your families.

00:35:46.220 --> 00:35:55.720
 To lay down your life, to take any price, to bear any cost, to bear any suffering, to do what it takes,

00:35:55.780 --> 00:36:03.840
 that your family will be the absolute picture, will be all that they can be by my grace.

00:36:03.840 --> 00:36:07.280
 And so what does that mean?

00:36:07.920 --> 00:36:14.300
 It means that as husbands we say, I will give up my rights to serve my wife and my children, my family.

00:36:14.800 --> 00:36:23.680
 I will help them to become the very best, most Christ-like, most radiant, most secure, most appreciated,

00:36:24.260 --> 00:36:31.519
 most loved women and children that will one day stand before God radiant and holy and blessed

00:36:31.519 --> 00:36:33.840
 because of the way that I have loved them.

00:36:37.139 --> 00:36:38.320
 You see what Paul is saying?

00:36:39.539 --> 00:36:42.880
 It's a radical commitment.

00:36:42.880 --> 00:36:47.980
 And friends, here is the challenge the passage asks us.

00:36:48.119 --> 00:36:51.140
 Yes, husbands and wives, you're called to be the head of your family.

00:36:52.079 --> 00:36:58.820
 But it's the head of a family that walks the way of the cross, with our wives better off because of the way that we've loved them.

00:36:59.700 --> 00:37:03.000
 Our children more, better off because of the way that we've loved them.

00:37:03.780 --> 00:37:11.260
 Our wives more secure, more radiant, more joyful, more deeply flooded with the gospel because of our love for them.

00:37:11.260 --> 00:37:16.960
 Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for them.

00:37:22.560 --> 00:37:23.860
 I'm not too sure what to do.

00:37:27.120 --> 00:37:27.520
 Amen.

00:37:32.440 --> 00:37:36.920
 I've got a couple of practical things to say, but maybe before we get there, can I just pray for us?

00:37:36.920 --> 00:37:36.980
 Amen.

00:37:41.260 --> 00:37:44.740
 Friends, this is not me.

00:37:47.140 --> 00:37:53.680
 I've tried to do so much repenting this week because this is not me and this is not my household.

00:37:55.460 --> 00:38:03.060
 Father God, we come before you this morning, God, because when we see the picture that you call us to,

00:38:03.059 --> 00:38:10.880
 God, we fall on our knees and say, God, have mercy on broken sinners like us.

00:38:12.900 --> 00:38:14.400
 God, we need you.

00:38:15.900 --> 00:38:21.599
 And Lord, I need you and the men and the women and the children and the people of the church.

00:38:21.719 --> 00:38:22.659
 We need you, God.

00:38:22.719 --> 00:38:26.840
 We need you to help us to love and serve like this.

00:38:26.840 --> 00:38:31.400
 God, we confess we don't have what it takes.

00:38:32.400 --> 00:38:34.360
 Oh, God, come and have your way.

00:38:35.860 --> 00:38:38.760
 Jesus, I pray, humble us, God.

00:38:38.860 --> 00:38:48.940
 Give us gospel-centered, Christ-centered humility that will change us and cause us, God, to love and serve one another like this.

00:38:48.940 --> 00:38:57.880
 Not demanding on our rights, not putting our interests first, but thinking how to serve and love those of our families and those around us.

00:38:59.619 --> 00:39:06.280
 God, I want to ask, won't you help us, the men of this church, and start with me to become more like you, Jesus.

00:39:06.280 --> 00:39:13.380
 To be more sacrificial, more loving, more selfless, and more servant-hearted, I pray.

00:39:13.540 --> 00:39:21.000
 Help us, oh God, that our homes and our families will look a little bit more like heaven because your gospel is changing our hearts.

00:39:22.380 --> 00:39:23.820
 God, come and do it, I pray.

00:39:25.519 --> 00:39:28.860
 In your gracious name, amen.

00:39:28.860 --> 00:39:36.920
 Okay, let me, sorry if this is a little bit all over the place.

00:39:37.059 --> 00:39:39.960
 Let me, let me give us a couple of practical things, okay?

00:39:40.620 --> 00:39:41.820
 What can we practically do?

00:39:41.880 --> 00:39:43.420
 Let me give us five practical things.

00:39:44.240 --> 00:39:45.160
 First thing is this.

00:39:45.940 --> 00:39:50.720
 For the men in Watermark, set the temperature, the spiritual temperature of your home.

00:39:51.559 --> 00:39:55.460
 Take the initiative to set the spiritual temperature of your home.

00:39:55.460 --> 00:40:01.000
 Men, can I ask you, who's setting the pattern of faith and confidence and trust in Christ?

00:40:01.780 --> 00:40:04.699
 Who's setting the pattern for devotions and loving God's Word?

00:40:05.619 --> 00:40:08.699
 Men, how are our children going to learn to read God's Word?

00:40:09.360 --> 00:40:12.260
 Who's showing them how to read God's Word and have a devotion in the morning?

00:40:13.300 --> 00:40:14.579
 Men, it's not all up to us.

00:40:15.079 --> 00:40:18.380
 Our wives are incredible and our children will learn so much from our wives.

00:40:18.440 --> 00:40:21.079
 But can we take the lead to set the initiative?

00:40:21.820 --> 00:40:24.800
 Men, who's modeling repentance and confession?

00:40:25.460 --> 00:40:28.940
 Are we the first to say sorry or are we going to wait for our wives to say sorry?

00:40:29.760 --> 00:40:33.059
 Let's model confession and repentance in the gospel, okay?

00:40:33.980 --> 00:40:40.039
 Secondly, men, can I urge us to pray for our wives and to pray with our wives?

00:40:40.960 --> 00:40:43.840
 Now, Claire's going to smile at this because I'm really bad at this.

00:40:45.159 --> 00:40:49.780
 Men, our wives long for their husbands to pray with them.

00:40:51.119 --> 00:40:52.119
 Most of them anyway.

00:40:53.099 --> 00:40:55.920
 And yet, as husbands, we find it so hard, right?

00:40:56.559 --> 00:41:00.739
 I know it's hard to open yourself up and to take the initiative.

00:41:01.519 --> 00:41:03.900
 Most wives wish their husbands would pray with them.

00:41:04.279 --> 00:41:06.859
 But they also don't want to beg their husbands to do it, right?

00:41:07.500 --> 00:41:10.359
 And so they might ask a few times and then they'll just give up.

00:41:11.119 --> 00:41:15.339
 Men, can we take the initiative to pray with our wives and to pray for our wives?

00:41:15.340 --> 00:41:19.260
 To maybe before you go to sleep say, hey, let's pray for our day tomorrow.

00:41:19.519 --> 00:41:21.740
 Or let's, can I pray for you before you go to bed?

00:41:22.420 --> 00:41:26.320
 And if you don't know what to pray for your wives, here's a couple of things to pray for, okay?

00:41:26.320 --> 00:41:27.480
 I've got 11 quick things.

00:41:27.860 --> 00:41:30.980
 Men, pray that God will be her deepest treasure.

00:41:31.840 --> 00:41:35.039
 Men, let's pray that God will give our wives faith and trust.

00:41:35.700 --> 00:41:39.120
 Let's pray that God will give our wives wisdom and strength for their calling.

00:41:39.119 --> 00:41:42.420
 That God will help her to love the church.

00:41:42.799 --> 00:41:45.819
 That God will give her great friends who will point her to Jesus.

00:41:46.579 --> 00:41:49.199
 Pray that God will help our wives hear his voice.

00:41:49.859 --> 00:41:52.799
 Pray that God will give her strength for her calling at her job.

00:41:53.599 --> 00:41:56.960
 Pray that she will know and treasure the gospel more and more.

00:41:57.579 --> 00:42:00.339
 Pray that she will be deeply secure in the love of Christ.

00:42:00.759 --> 00:42:04.880
 Pray that God will multiply our wives' influence and blessing.

00:42:05.699 --> 00:42:08.440
 Pray that she will abide in Christ and be full of the Spirit.

00:42:09.119 --> 00:42:10.019
 Okay, that's a good start.

00:42:10.099 --> 00:42:12.259
 You can find some more in addition to that, okay?

00:42:12.719 --> 00:42:15.119
 So let's pray for our wives and pray with our wives.

00:42:15.699 --> 00:42:17.319
 Here's the third thing practically to do.

00:42:17.880 --> 00:42:24.139
 Men, flee and fight sexual temptation with everything you've got, okay?

00:42:24.279 --> 00:42:25.980
 Sorry if I'm standing in the way here.

00:42:27.380 --> 00:42:30.039
 Friends, it's easy to make excuses, right?

00:42:30.699 --> 00:42:31.659
 It was just a look.

00:42:32.339 --> 00:42:33.219
 It was just a thought.

00:42:33.880 --> 00:42:35.099
 It didn't hurt anybody.

00:42:35.279 --> 00:42:36.219
 Nobody will know.

00:42:36.219 --> 00:42:40.039
 Friends, small compromises lead to big compromises.

00:42:40.599 --> 00:42:48.359
 And big compromises destroy families and they destroy our wives' confidence and joy and security.

00:42:49.539 --> 00:42:51.819
 Men, let's fight sexual temptation.

00:42:51.820 --> 00:42:59.880
 And let's get brothers around us that will know us and that we can be open to, that can be real with, that can ask us difficult questions.

00:43:00.360 --> 00:43:07.780
 Because there is no greater way to destroy our wives and our children than to give in to temptation like this.

00:43:07.960 --> 00:43:09.039
 And so let's fight it.

00:43:09.640 --> 00:43:10.740
 Marshall Siegel said this,

00:43:10.739 --> 00:43:16.339
 The best way for a man to protect his home around him is for him to guard his heart within him.

00:43:16.939 --> 00:43:17.899
 So let's do that.

00:43:18.659 --> 00:43:19.479
 Here's a fourth thing.

00:43:20.019 --> 00:43:22.000
 For the single men in the church, right?

00:43:22.899 --> 00:43:28.019
 Don't wait until you're a husband or a father to try and become this kind of man.

00:43:28.719 --> 00:43:32.419
 If you're a single guy, start to get the gospel deep in your heart.

00:43:32.899 --> 00:43:34.519
 Ask God to change you today.

00:43:34.719 --> 00:43:37.719
 Ask God to make you selfless and others seeking.

00:43:37.719 --> 00:43:46.299
 Ask God to so reorientate your heart that you can use whatever social capital you have to serve the interests of those around you.

00:43:46.779 --> 00:43:49.959
 Friends, one day God will hopefully call you to be a husband and a dad.

00:43:50.539 --> 00:43:54.859
 And so start today to become the man that can love your families like this.

00:43:55.939 --> 00:44:00.899
 And for the single ladies in our church, pray that God will give you a husband like this.

00:44:01.539 --> 00:44:05.339
 Pray that God will give you a husband that will love you like Christ loved the church.

00:44:05.340 --> 00:44:18.920
 Ladies, can I say, can you see why the Bible would strongly encourage us to marry somebody who knows Christ and is letting the gospel shape them?

00:44:19.680 --> 00:44:25.039
 Because it's really hard to be married to someone who wants to love like Jesus when they don't know Jesus.

00:44:25.660 --> 00:44:30.720
 And wants the gospel to be the standard for how they're going to love their families when they don't know the gospel.

00:44:30.719 --> 00:44:35.079
 And so wives, I've got, ladies, I've got two daughters.

00:44:35.559 --> 00:44:36.899
 I pray for my husband.

00:44:37.019 --> 00:44:38.359
 I pray for my children.

00:44:42.399 --> 00:44:44.919
 I'm so glad that that released some attention in the room.

00:44:45.939 --> 00:44:50.659
 I've been praying, Claire and I have been praying for our daughters' husbands since before they were born.

00:44:51.319 --> 00:44:55.599
 When they're in Claire's womb, we were praying, God, you know, won't you give them great men?

00:44:55.599 --> 00:44:58.440
 And so single ladies, I know it's hard.

00:44:59.059 --> 00:45:05.019
 And I know that if you choose to only marry a Christian man, it is going to be hard.

00:45:05.619 --> 00:45:07.199
 And I know you're making a sacrifice.

00:45:08.819 --> 00:45:11.259
 And I want to say that God is going to honor your sacrifice.

00:45:12.659 --> 00:45:13.739
 And God will look after you.

00:45:14.759 --> 00:45:15.920
 And our heart is for you.

00:45:15.940 --> 00:45:16.719
 And I know it's hard.

00:45:17.619 --> 00:45:18.599
 And we love you.

00:45:18.679 --> 00:45:19.500
 And we're praying for you.

00:45:19.559 --> 00:45:22.380
 And we're going to do everything we can to set you up with some great guys.

00:45:22.380 --> 00:45:27.440
 Okay, let me bring this to a close.

00:45:29.260 --> 00:45:31.519
 The final thing is this, an alternative community.

00:45:32.579 --> 00:45:33.860
 I'm going to wrap this up quickly.

00:45:34.980 --> 00:45:38.039
 Chapter 5, verse 22 can sound so offensive, right?

00:45:38.579 --> 00:45:40.079
 Wives, submit to your own husbands.

00:45:40.280 --> 00:45:44.480
 Oh my goodness, who is this guy that, who does he think that he is?

00:45:45.099 --> 00:45:49.019
 The basis for verse 22 is actually found in verse 21.

00:45:49.619 --> 00:45:51.960
 And the Greek grammar makes it very clear.

00:45:52.380 --> 00:45:56.559
 That 22 is actually a follow-on from the train of thought in verse 21.

00:45:56.680 --> 00:45:57.760
 What does verse 21 say?

00:45:58.579 --> 00:46:01.619
 Submit one to another out of reverence for Christ.

00:46:02.300 --> 00:46:05.099
 Now that, of course, Paul is not undermining everything he's saying.

00:46:05.460 --> 00:46:08.680
 He's not saying, okay, just, you know, there's no such thing as leadership.

00:46:09.200 --> 00:46:10.460
 He obviously has written for that.

00:46:11.059 --> 00:46:16.740
 Nobody logically thinks that, you know, parents submit to their children.

00:46:17.360 --> 00:46:18.680
 So the flow of thought is clear.

00:46:18.679 --> 00:46:23.399
 But in other words, what Paul is saying is that submission is not a weakness virtue.

00:46:23.980 --> 00:46:25.559
 It's not a female virtue.

00:46:26.059 --> 00:46:27.460
 It's not a children virtue.

00:46:27.980 --> 00:46:29.899
 Submission is a Christian virtue.

00:46:30.399 --> 00:46:31.839
 Because it's the way of Christ.

00:46:32.239 --> 00:46:33.419
 And it's the way of the cross.

00:46:34.179 --> 00:46:36.739
 And so it's the way of Christian households.

00:46:37.019 --> 00:46:38.419
 Of husbands and wives.

00:46:38.559 --> 00:46:39.739
 Parents and children.

00:46:39.919 --> 00:46:41.440
 Employers and employees.

00:46:41.440 --> 00:46:46.900
 As Christian households become an alternative community that lives in a different way from the world.

00:46:47.119 --> 00:46:49.740
 That shows the world a different way to live.

00:46:50.300 --> 00:46:52.920
 Which serves and surrenders to one another.

00:46:53.360 --> 00:46:54.420
 And submission to Christ.

00:46:55.119 --> 00:46:57.480
 Friends, the Bible begins and ends with two marriages.

00:46:58.200 --> 00:47:01.480
 The first marriage in the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve.

00:47:01.480 --> 00:47:04.400
 We see the effects of sin.

00:47:05.000 --> 00:47:05.900
 Of selfishness.

00:47:06.340 --> 00:47:08.800
 And the utter destruction that it brings on the world.

00:47:10.059 --> 00:47:12.440
 But thankfully that's not the only marriage we see in the Bible.

00:47:13.380 --> 00:47:15.039
 The Bible ends with another marriage.

00:47:15.740 --> 00:47:18.760
 It's the marriage of Christ to his bride, the church.

00:47:19.619 --> 00:47:21.980
 And Jesus Christ, the true and better Adam.

00:47:22.480 --> 00:47:24.380
 The perfect Adam and the perfect husband.

00:47:24.960 --> 00:47:26.320
 Is coming back again.

00:47:26.920 --> 00:47:28.820
 To get for himself a bride.

00:47:28.940 --> 00:47:30.139
 Those that are in Christ.

00:47:30.139 --> 00:47:33.859
 And he will love us perfectly for all eternity.

00:47:34.079 --> 00:47:35.379
 And he will make us perfect.

00:47:35.960 --> 00:47:38.039
 And he will flood our hearts with his grace.

00:47:38.659 --> 00:47:41.099
 And he says that for those of us that are in Christ now.

00:47:41.199 --> 00:47:43.019
 We get a small measure of that grace.

00:47:43.460 --> 00:47:45.500
 That we can experience his love.

00:47:45.900 --> 00:47:47.420
 Whether you're a husband or wife.

00:47:47.519 --> 00:47:48.019
 A parent.

00:47:48.139 --> 00:47:48.539
 A child.

00:47:48.619 --> 00:47:49.139
 An employer.

00:47:49.299 --> 00:47:49.779
 An employee.

00:47:50.159 --> 00:47:51.279
 No matter who you are.

00:47:51.579 --> 00:47:52.679
 If you are in Christ.

00:47:52.679 --> 00:47:54.139
 You can experience his love.

00:47:54.219 --> 00:47:55.559
 In a way that will change you.

00:47:56.000 --> 00:47:56.900
 And cause you.

00:47:57.319 --> 00:47:58.339
 To love and serve others.

00:47:58.759 --> 00:47:59.900
 Like Christ has loved.

00:48:00.139 --> 00:48:01.219
 And served us.

00:48:01.799 --> 00:48:02.299
 And so friends.

00:48:02.400 --> 00:48:03.400
 If you're in Christ today.

00:48:05.299 --> 00:48:06.179
 Jesus Christ.

00:48:06.279 --> 00:48:07.139
 Set your hope on him.

00:48:07.279 --> 00:48:08.139
 He is your hope.

00:48:08.299 --> 00:48:09.099
 He is your help.

00:48:09.239 --> 00:48:10.119
 He is your security.

00:48:10.739 --> 00:48:11.920
 He is the one to look to.

00:48:12.019 --> 00:48:13.000
 And to hold on to.

00:48:13.539 --> 00:48:14.920
 Let his love today.

00:48:15.139 --> 00:48:16.079
 Melt our hearts.

00:48:16.639 --> 00:48:17.699
 Pierce our pride.

00:48:18.219 --> 00:48:19.159
 Bring us to our knees.

00:48:19.579 --> 00:48:20.960
 And help us to love others.

00:48:21.379 --> 00:48:22.659
 Like he has loved us.

00:48:23.500 --> 00:48:24.440
 Let's pray together.

00:48:24.440 --> 00:48:24.599
 Father.

00:48:25.599 --> 00:48:26.400
 Father.

00:48:26.599 --> 00:48:26.800
 We.

00:48:29.320 --> 00:48:30.360
 Don't know what to say.

00:48:31.900 --> 00:48:32.360
 God.

00:48:32.760 --> 00:48:33.440
 Your scriptures.

00:48:33.659 --> 00:48:34.380
 As we said.

00:48:34.500 --> 00:48:35.800
 Are so challenging.

00:48:37.159 --> 00:48:37.960
 And yet.

00:48:38.019 --> 00:48:38.659
 They are good.

00:48:39.780 --> 00:48:40.760
 They show us.

00:48:40.880 --> 00:48:42.079
 A different kind of way.

00:48:44.340 --> 00:48:44.780
 God.

00:48:44.880 --> 00:48:45.380
 I pray.

00:48:45.539 --> 00:48:46.860
 Won't you call us.

00:48:46.940 --> 00:48:47.179
 God.

00:48:47.320 --> 00:48:48.059
 To this.

00:48:48.659 --> 00:48:48.980
 Model.

00:48:48.980 --> 00:48:49.719
 Of love.

00:48:50.320 --> 00:48:51.119
 And relationships.

00:48:52.500 --> 00:48:52.820
 God.

00:48:52.900 --> 00:48:53.159
 May the.

00:48:53.159 --> 00:48:53.840
 The households.

00:48:54.099 --> 00:48:54.699
 And the homes.

00:48:54.699 --> 00:48:55.360
 Of watermark.

00:48:55.420 --> 00:48:56.219
 Reflect heaven.

00:48:57.360 --> 00:48:57.639
 Of.

00:48:58.260 --> 00:48:58.659
 Unparalleled.

00:48:58.840 --> 00:48:59.079
 And.

00:48:59.320 --> 00:49:00.360
 Out of this world.

00:49:01.139 --> 00:49:01.579
 Humility.

00:49:02.500 --> 00:49:02.900
 Service.

00:49:03.820 --> 00:49:04.300
 Sacrifice.

00:49:04.420 --> 00:49:04.800
 And love.

00:49:07.699 --> 00:49:08.380
 Lord Jesus.

00:49:08.440 --> 00:49:08.800
 I pray.

00:49:08.900 --> 00:49:09.639
 Give us courage.

00:49:09.820 --> 00:49:09.960
 To.

00:49:10.659 --> 00:49:11.719
 To become the men and women.

00:49:11.820 --> 00:49:12.699
 That you call us to be.

00:49:14.320 --> 00:49:14.719
 God.

00:49:14.760 --> 00:49:15.260
 For those of us.

00:49:15.300 --> 00:49:15.639
 That are men.

00:49:15.699 --> 00:49:15.840
 God.

00:49:15.900 --> 00:49:16.400
 Help us.

00:49:16.500 --> 00:49:17.320
 To lead.

00:49:17.960 --> 00:49:18.860
 So graciously.

00:49:18.860 --> 00:49:19.559
 So gently.

00:49:20.120 --> 00:49:21.059
 Not abdicating.

00:49:21.059 --> 00:49:21.480
 The roles.

00:49:21.559 --> 00:49:22.280
 You call us to.

00:49:22.820 --> 00:49:23.660
 But not using it.

00:49:23.700 --> 00:49:24.599
 To our own advantages.

00:49:25.480 --> 00:49:25.840
 God.

00:49:25.960 --> 00:49:26.480
 May we.

00:49:26.680 --> 00:49:27.240
 Lay down.

00:49:27.340 --> 00:49:27.880
 Our lives.

00:49:27.940 --> 00:49:29.120
 As Christ did for us.

00:49:30.079 --> 00:49:30.440
 God.

00:49:30.500 --> 00:49:30.800
 I pray.

00:49:30.880 --> 00:49:31.640
 Come and help us.

00:49:32.900 --> 00:49:33.320
 And father.

00:49:33.400 --> 00:49:34.079
 If there is anything.

00:49:34.079 --> 00:49:34.940
 That I have said today.

00:49:35.019 --> 00:49:36.320
 Which is not of your will.

00:49:36.420 --> 00:49:37.740
 Which is not of your scripture.

00:49:37.980 --> 00:49:39.460
 Which goes against your heart.

00:49:39.539 --> 00:49:39.680
 Lord.

00:49:39.720 --> 00:49:40.059
 I pray.

00:49:40.140 --> 00:49:41.260
 Let it fall in deaf ears.

00:49:41.800 --> 00:49:43.059
 Let it not take root in our hearts.

00:49:43.200 --> 00:49:43.460
 God.

00:49:43.539 --> 00:49:44.660
 We want your way.

00:49:44.660 --> 00:49:45.380
 And your will.

00:49:46.620 --> 00:49:47.500
 We pray this.

00:49:47.579 --> 00:49:48.039
 And your good.

00:49:48.860 --> 00:49:49.860
 In your gracious name.

00:49:50.900 --> 00:49:51.240
 Amen.

00:49:51.240 --> 00:49:51.420
 Amen.

00:49:51.420 --> 00:50:21.400
 Thank you.