1 Corinthians chapter 7, we're beginning today at verse 10 as we continue our series through
this book. 1 Corinthians 7, starting at verse 10. These are Paul's words.
To the married, I give this charge, not I, but the Lord. The wife should not separate from her
husband, but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband,
and the husband should not divorce his wife. To the rest I say, I, not the Lord, that if any brother
has a wife who is an unbeliever and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her.
If any woman who has a husband who is an unbeliever and he consents to live with her,
she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife,
and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise, your children would be
unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so.
In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. For how do you know,
wife, whether you will save your husband? How do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
Let's pray. Father, we thank you for your faithful love to us in Jesus Christ, that you will never
leave us nor forsake us. As we consider this topic of marriage and divorce, we pray that you would
speak to our hearts and our minds through your word and by the power of your spirit. In Christ's name
we pray. Amen. So this morning, we come to Paul's instructions about marriage and divorce.
This can be a rough topic, but as we were singing this morning, great is thy faithfulness.
Oh, the deep, deep love of Jesus. It is well with my soul when peace like a river attendeth my way
or when sorrows like sea billows roll. Whatever my lot, you have taught me to say it is well with my soul.
You know, we come together, we're broken people, but we come together because of the faithful love
of Christ. So I pray that above all that you would know that this morning. All right, let's dive in.
I think there are at least three factors that affect how we approach this topic of marriage and divorce.
Number one, our culture. We live in a culture where divorce is relatively easy. All 50 states have no
fault, divorce and common. Now, it's not true that 50% of marriages will end in divorce. That statistic gets thrown
around a lot. The divorce rate has actually been going down since 1980, but if current trends hold, about one-third
of marriages in the U.S. will end in divorce. Now, part of the reason divorce rates are going down is because
fewer people are getting married, more people are just living together and then breaking up rather than getting
married and then divorced. Anyway, so that's some of our culture. Second factor is our theology. Now,
there's an ongoing debate among scholars and pastors who are all committed in principle to the authority
of Scripture, yet come to some very different conclusions about divorce and especially remarriage.
Some of you may be deeply influenced by a particular church teaching, and some of you may be reacting
against a particular church teaching that you found to be unhealthy or unbiblical. Now, a few years ago,
the elders of Trinity studied this topic together. We wanted to study it when it wasn't immediately a
pressing concern in a very personal situation. And so, we developed a working paper that summarized
our consensus and that guides our pastoral practice. And what I'll be saying today, this morning,
is informed and guided by that consensus. Third factor, I think the most powerful factor for many
of us is personal experience. Divorce isn't just a cultural phenomenon or a theological debate. It's a
painful and personal reality. Maybe your marriage is deeply troubled and you're wondering, is there any way
forward or would divorce be a better solution? Maybe your spouse has told you that they want a divorce
and you're trying to figure out how to respond. Maybe you're living in the aftermath of divorce.
Maybe you feel guilt and regret or hurt and betrayal or grief and loneliness. Your life, your family
is being torn apart. Maybe you're wondering, how do I move forward after divorce? Should I stay single
or should I consider getting married again? Now, some of you may never be in any of these situations,
but we all need to consider what it means to come alongside your friends and especially our brothers
and sisters in Christ who are in these very situations. Now, in 1 Thessalonians, Paul says
to believers, he says, we should admonish the undisciplined, we should encourage the faint-hearted,
and we should help the weak. And that's a good picture of Christian love. Sometimes Christian
love looks like challenging someone who is stubborn or hard-hearted. Sometimes Christian love looks like
encouraging someone who is discouraged, who is faint-hearted, coming alongside them
and coming close to them. Sometimes it looks like helping the weak. And that word help means
to take hold of someone and not let go of them and say, I'm going to walk with you through this
and we're not going to leave you alone. And often Christian love is a mixture of all three of those
things, admonishing, encouraging, and helping. So this morning I want to look at this passage
in those three dimensions. First, culturally, I want to explain a little bit what this passage would
have meant to the first century Corinthian Christians, a little bit of their cultural context
compared to ours. Second, theologically, I want to put this passage in context of the other biblical
teaching on this topic, but also of the big story of the Bible, God's purpose in creation,
and the fact that we are living in a fallen world and how Christ has come to redeem us.
And third, personally, along the way, I'm going to be giving some personal words of application
and implications. So let's dive in. Number one, the cultural context, what this passage would have
meant for the first century Corinthian Christians. Look down in your Bibles. There are two paragraphs,
verse 10 and 11 and verse 12 through 16. Verses 10 and 11, Paul says to the married,
I give this charge. He's talking to couples where both husband and wife are Christian believers.
Now, in this section, Paul reaffirms the explicit teaching of Jesus about marriage and divorce,
which is recorded for us in Matthew 19 and Mark 10. We read Mark 10 earlier in the service.
And that's why Paul says in verse 10, not I, but the Lord. In other words, Jesus himself addressed
this particular question. I'm just repeating and reiterating what he said in these verses.
Now, verse 12, Paul says to the rest, to the rest, I say, I not the Lord. And in this paragraph,
he's talking to Christians who are married to someone who does not share their faith.
Now, what does Paul mean by I not the Lord? Verse 12, Paul is not saying here,
this is just my personal opinion. You can take it or leave it.
No, when Paul wrote to the Corinthians, he wrote with the authority of an apostle commissioned by
Jesus Christ. So at the end of chapter 14, he says, if anyone thinks he is a prophet or spiritual,
let him acknowledge that the things I am writing to you are a command of the Lord. At the end of this
very chapter, he claims to have the spirit of God. Now, what Paul is saying here is,
I'm addressing a situation that Jesus did not specifically address in his earthly ministry.
So the church at Corinth, like many of the other new churches that had begun, started springing up
all over the Gentile world included many people who were coming out of pagan backgrounds. And sometimes
a whole household would come to faith in Jesus. We have a few examples of that. But at other times,
only one spouse would come to faith in Christ and the other didn't. So it seems some of the
Corinthian Christians were wondering, if I'm in that position, should I stay married to my unbelieving
spouse or would it be better to divorce them and marry someone else instead, perhaps someone else
more like-minded? Now, in ancient Corinth, here's a little context. Here's a little bit of the cultural
context of ancient Corinth. Divorce was even easier than it is today because there was no legal process
required. If the wife left home or if the husband sent the wife away, that was considered divorce by
separation, even if there wasn't a signed agreement. Sometimes there was a signed agreement, sometimes
there wasn't. The only potential legal dispute concerned who would get the dowry,
basically how the finances get divided. Anyway. And divorce was very common. So there's one
funeral inscription from a Corinthian couple who were married for 41 years. And it read,
uncommon are marriages which last so long, brought to an end by death, not broken apart by divorce.
Some scholars estimate, this is only a guess, that maybe the majority of Corinthian marriages ended in
divorce. And after divorce, remarriage was expected and encouraged and nearly all ancient divorce
certificates explicitly stated that both parties were free to remarry. So this is some of the cultural
context in which Paul was writing. Divorce was easy and it was very common. And in this context,
Paul sought to give scripturally grounded and contextually appropriate pastoral guidance.
Paul recognized that he's dealing with a new situation that Jesus hadn't specifically
addressed. Jesus was talking in a Jewish context to people who all accepted the authority of the
Bible in principle. And Paul's realizing he's facing a new situation. And sometimes we find ourselves
in a similar situation. For example, many modern technologies raise important moral questions
that aren't directly addressed in the Bible because the technologies didn't exist back then.
And the way Paul addresses this issue is an example for us. He gives pastoral guidance that is deeply grounded
in scriptural principles and in the scripture storyline and well aware of his particular context.
All right, so that's some of the cultural context. Second, the biblical context or the theological context.
I want to talk about what does this passage mean in light of the big story of scripture.
And again, the big story of scripture is God created us and everything to show his own glory.
And he made us in his image. And yet we have fallen away from him because of our sin and rebellion.
We live in a fallen world and Christ has come to redeem and heal and restore all that was broken by sin.
And Paul's instructions make sense within this three-part story.
So first, Paul begins by affirming God's original creational intent for marriage.
Marriage is intended to reflect God's covenant faithfulness, his steadfast, unchanging love.
So if you look down in both sections, how does Paul begin?
He begins by urging Christians not to divorce their spouses.
Verses 10 and 11.
The wife should not separate from her husband and the husband should not divorce his wife.
Now, Paul is not distinguishing between separation and divorce.
That distinction did not exist in ancient Corinth.
To separate meant to leave or to break off.
To divorce meant to send away or release.
Two different verbs, same effect.
In verse 12 and 13, he uses the same verb for both husband and wife.
And notice, Paul speaks equally to both husbands and wives.
And this, in his time, the culture was changing, but it was still largely husbands who initiated divorces back then.
But Paul, throughout this passage, places equal responsibility on both a husband and wife.
So, Paul begins by pointing people toward God's intent that marriage be faithfully permanent till death do us part.
And in this regard, Paul is closely following Jesus' example.
As we read earlier, in Mark chapter 10, you might want to turn back there.
The Pharisees came to Jesus and said,
Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?
And Jesus did not immediately answer their question about if and when divorce might be permitted.
He began by pointing back to God's intent in creation.
Jesus said,
Now, there are many other purposes that are connected with marriage.
Marriage provides a context for procreation, for having children, raising children.
Marriage is a form of mutual helpfulness and companionship and friendship.
Marriage is the appropriate context for sexual pleasure and a guard against sexual immorality.
In most societies, marriage conveys some practical economic benefits.
But according to the Bible, the primary purpose of marriage is actually not any of those.
The primary purpose of marriage in God's design is to be a picture of the intimate and exclusive and permanent union of two fundamentally different entities.
God and his people.
Christ and the church.
Heaven and earth.
Male and female.
United as one.
So that's why Jesus refers back to the creation account in Genesis 2, 1 and 2.
God created humanity male and female.
And he said the two shall be united and become one flesh.
And that's also why marriage appears at the beginning, middle, and end of the Bible.
You have the creation story in Genesis 1 and 2.
And it culminates in marriage.
Adam's saying to Eve, you are bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.
That's an oath of loyalty.
It's saying we are one body together.
We are inextricably united.
And in that context of exclusive commitment, it's found a safe place for emotional vulnerability and physical intimacy.
They were naked and unashamed.
Marriage also appears in the middle of the Bible, in the Gospel of John.
It begins with echoes of the story of creation.
In the beginning was the Word.
And then at the end of chapter 1, you come to chapter 2, and Jesus' first miracle happens at a wedding in Cana.
The Bible also ends in the book of Revelation.
The end of Revelation, Revelation 19, Revelation 21, is a vision of the marriage supper of the Lamb.
When God and his people will be united forever.
When heaven and earth are reunited.
When God comes to dwell with us forever.
And so marriage is very precious to God because it embodies and illustrates and bears witness to this eternal reality.
And so Jesus says, in light of all this, what God has joined together, let not man separate.
If your marriage is in trouble, this is the first biblical truth you need to consider.
That God has joined you together, and so do all that is in your power to preserve and protect and deepen that union which is precious in God's sight.
Now when Paul urges Christians not to divorce, in verse 10 through 13, he's not just warning against signing a divorce decree.
The implication of his words is, don't let anything get in the way of the exclusive, intimate, persevering union into which God has called you.
That's what Paul referenced in chapter 6, when he talks about the two becoming one flesh.
And in verse 4 of this chapter, when he says that the wife and husband belong to one another, he's referencing that biblical vision.
So brothers and sisters, don't settle.
Don't settle for staying legally married, but living parallel lives.
That's what many Christians end up settling for.
They'll never get a divorce, but they've given up on building and growing in their relationship with their spouse.
Don't let anger and resentment build up in your heart.
Don't let conflicts smolder under the surface, unaddressed, unvoiced, unresolved.
Wives, don't complain to your girlfriends about your husband's flaws.
And beware the temptation to fantasize about a different kind of man who is more sensitive or who takes more initiative.
Husbands, don't belittle your wife by dismissing her concerns and scorning her in your mind.
And don't forsake her for a deceptive image on a screen.
Song of Solomon says, catch the little foxes that spoil the vineyards.
In other words, marriage is a garden to cultivate.
Don't let it be overtaken by annoying, destructive pests.
Hebrews 3 says, let us encourage one another daily so that we are not hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.
Marriage can be hard.
But it's worth investing in and it's worth persevering for.
Now maybe you're facing more serious problems.
If you're being physically abused, reach out for help.
Seeking to preserve your marriage does not mean tolerating ongoing violence or threats.
That's not good for you or your spouse and there are resources available to help both of you.
But don't wait until it's a crisis to reach out for help.
Often married couples don't seek help from a pastor or a counselor or a mature friend until one of them is already talking to the divorce lawyer.
That's like calling 911 after the fire has been blazing for hours and three quarters of the house has already burned down.
And then you call 911 and then you have three or four sessions with the marriage counselor and you're disappointed that your marriage isn't singing again.
Because the house has been burning down for so long.
Or other times people meet with the pastor or counselor but they don't come clean about what's going on.
They say, ah, we've got a little smoke damage here.
We need some help repainting.
The reality is the load-bearing wall is crumbling.
And the foundation is cracking.
If you don't come clean with what's going on, nobody's going to be able to help you.
And it goes the other way too.
If you smell smoke coming from a friend's house, if you notice some funky, weird dynamics in someone's attitude toward their spouse, don't ignore that.
Sometimes people who are really struggling don't know how to reach out for help.
But they will respond if someone reaches out to them.
But again, we shouldn't wait until there's a crisis.
You know, some of you, I really appreciate this.
Some of you ask me, how are things going with you and Jane?
And you're not just being polite and saying, how are you?
Good.
But you actually really want to know.
And we're doing great, by the way.
But this should be a normal topic of conversation.
You have complete permission to ask me that question any time you want.
And if I seem to avoid it and give a vague answer, you can say, really, how are things going?
That's part of how we can encourage one another.
And pray for each other.
And build each other up and rejoice in the goodness of one another's marriages.
Now, before we continue on, Paul addresses, in verse 12 through 16, Christians who are married to people who do not share their faith.
In particular.
So let me speak to you, if that's you.
Now, side note, if you're single and you want to get married, Paul says you should pursue someone who shares your faith.
He makes that clear in verse 39.
But Paul's not talking to single people here.
He's talking to people who are already married.
Most likely one spouse had become a Christian and the other hadn't.
But whatever the situation was, let me speak to you if your spouse does not share your faith.
Some of the Corinthian Christians were worried that because their spouse had not yet become a Christian, that they were being spiritually contaminated by their ongoing marital union.
But in verse 14, Paul reassured them that actually the reverse is true.
He says the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband.
Now, this doesn't mean that a spouse who doesn't believe in Jesus is actually saved and personally reconciled to God just because they're married to a believer.
Verse 16 makes that clear.
Your spouse may come to saving faith in Christ, but that's not guaranteed.
What verse 14 does mean is that because the Holy Spirit dwells in you as a believer, the Holy Spirit now dwells among your family.
Even if others in your family don't accept Christ.
But as you love your spouse and love your children, they will experience the presence of Christ through you.
So if you're married to a non-Christian, abide in Christ and let his presence flow through you into your home.
Now, on the one hand, don't withdraw from Christian community or disobey Christ out of fear or desire to please your spouse.
In order to be filled with the Holy Spirit continually and to let the presence of Christ overflow through you, you need your brothers and sisters in Christ to encourage you and build you up.
But also, don't become so involved in ministry activities outside your home and marriage that you neglect your spouse and end up driving them away.
If your spouse is a difficult person, don't avoid them just for that reason and get involved in a bunch of other church things.
And that's sometimes a temptation for new and zealous Christians.
But being a Christian should make you more committed to your marriage, not less.
Even if your spouse is indifferent or resistant to the faith.
Let your spouse and children see Christ in you.
What does that look like?
Looks like being patient and loving and persistent and forgiving.
When you screw up, admit it.
Ask forgiveness.
That's something that as Christians we are empowered by the Holy Spirit to do.
So this is where Paul begins.
God's purpose in creation for marriage to be faithfully permanent.
And he encourages all of us who are married to pursue that.
But Paul doesn't just point back to God's purpose in creation.
Paul also recognizes the second part of the biblical story that we live in a fallen world.
And in this fallen world, divorce is a sad reality.
If you look in both paragraphs in verse 11 and in verse 15,
after affirming God's design for marriage to be faithfully permanent,
Paul gives two but-ifs.
Verse 11, the wife should not separate from her husband.
But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband.
Verse 15, but if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so.
In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved.
Now, what's going on here?
Is Paul relativizing everything he just said about marriage, meaning meant to be faithfully permanent?
No.
But Paul, as a wise pastor, is recognizing that we live in a messy and broken world.
And a good pastor doesn't just loudly insist on God's unchanging moral principles.
A good pastor like Jesus comes to meet people where they are
and help them take the next step toward where they need to be.
That's what Christ did.
He came to earth.
He came to meet us where we are in all of the mess that we're in.
And he came to bring us out of it and help and bring us into God's holy presence.
So once again, Paul's following Jesus' example.
When Jesus discussed marriage and divorce,
he began by pointing back towards God's purpose for marriage and creation,
but he also recognized the reality of divorce.
If you look in Matthew chapter 19, verse 9,
after reminding the Pharisees of God's purpose for marriage ever since the beginning,
he mentioned one particular instance in which divorce was permitted.
Whoever divorces his wife except for sexual immorality and marries another commits adultery.
Now the background to Jesus' statement is this.
According to the Mosaic law in the Old Testament,
adultery and other forms of extramarital sex by a married person were punishable by death.
So if the law was carried out, the adulterous spouse would be executed.
The other spouse would then be released from their marriage obligations
and therefore free to remarry if they so desired.
Likewise, under the new covenant,
in the case of sexual unfaithfulness that violates the marriage covenant,
I think Jesus is saying divorce and remarriage may be permitted
even if the adulterous spouse is still alive.
Now, some people have wondered,
why does Matthew include the exception clause,
the exception for sexual unfaithfulness,
where Mark and Luke and Paul in this passage don't explicitly include that?
And the answer to that, I think, is when the Bible states a general rule,
it does not always clarify in every instance
whether or not there are occasional and unusual exceptions to the rule.
For example, in the Ten Commandments, it says,
do not bear false witness.
In other words, don't lie or deceive other people.
But there are at least two instances in the Old Testament
where people are commended for acting deceptively.
Rahab was commended for hiding the spies in her house
and not telling the men of Jericho where they were
because the men of Jericho wanted to kill them.
And the Egyptian midwives in Exodus 1
were commended for deceiving Pharaoh
when Pharaoh wanted to kill the Hebrew baby boys.
Now, these exceptions do not invalidate the general rule.
This is not licensed to lie and deceive whenever you feel like it.
But when merciless predators are trying to kill God's people,
it's okay not to tell the truth to them.
I think that's what it means.
There are exceptions,
but the exceptions don't overshadow the rule.
And I think this is the balance we need to hold.
If you read Christian writings on divorce and remarriage,
there are writings that fall into both categories.
I think some that fall into a harsh legalism
and some that fall into a permissive license.
And neither of those are healthy,
and sometimes they can end up reinforcing each other, actually.
All right, back to verse Corinthians 7 and the but-ifs.
Verse 11.
In one case, Paul counsels a divorced person
to remain unmarried or be reconciled.
The situation seems to have been some wives in Corinth
wanted to divorce their husbands and marry someone else.
Perhaps one or more of them had already left their husbands.
And Paul is warning them specifically not to get remarried.
Now, the reason for Paul's warning
goes back once again to the Old Testament.
Deuteronomy 24.
Turn there.
Deuteronomy 24 is the most extended discussion
of divorce in the Old Testament law.
It's a passage probably most of us aren't well familiar with.
So that's why I want to read it.
Deuteronomy 24, 1 to 4.
When a man takes a wife and marries her,
if then she finds no favor in his eyes
because he has found some indecency in her,
and he writes her a certificate of divorce,
and puts it in her hand,
and sends her out of the house,
and she departs out of his house,
and if she goes and becomes another man's wife,
and the latter man hates her,
and writes her a certificate of divorce,
and puts it in her hand,
and sends her out of the house,
or if the latter man dies,
who took her to be his wife,
then her former husband,
who sent her away,
may not take her again to be his wife
after she has been defiled,
for that is an abomination before the Lord.
Okay.
Now, what does this mean?
Among other things,
it means that remarriage
removes any possibility of reconciliation,
marital reconciliation,
with your first spouse.
If you divorce,
and then remarry,
you can never go back
to the first spouse.
Not even if the second spouse
dies or divorces you.
And so Paul is speaking to followers of Christ.
He's saying,
if you are both followers of Christ,
you should not permanently close the door
to reconciliation by divorcing and remarrying.
There are means,
which God has provided,
to promote reconciliation among believers
who have sinned against one another.
And you should do all that is in your power
to make use of those means,
even if you're already divorced
or living separately.
So Matthew 18 says,
if your brother or sister sins against you,
first, attempt to resolve the matter privately.
Second, if that doesn't work,
ask one or two others to mediate.
That's where you ask for help
from a mature Christian friend
or a pastor or a counselor.
If there's still no resolution,
bring it then, Paul says,
bring it to the church.
In other words,
call upon the elders.
And as we saw back in 1 Corinthians 5,
if someone persists in unrepentant
and serious sin,
the church should tell that person,
we can no longer recognize you
as a fellow Christian
because your pattern of life
is so far out of line
with your profession of faith.
But if that happens,
we are no longer in the verse 10 and 11 situation,
a marriage of two Christians.
We are in verse 12 to 16,
a marriage of one,
of a believer and an unbeliever.
So there's the first but if,
verse 11.
Here's the second but if,
verse 15.
If the unbelieving partner separates,
let it be so.
In this case,
the brother or sister is not enslaved.
So Paul's already said,
verse 12, 13,
if they consent to live with you,
according to the covenant of marriage,
you should not divorce them.
But,
if the unbelieving partner separates,
he says,
let it be so.
There may come a time
when you have done
all that is in your power
to preserve your marriage
and to pursue reconciliation
with your spouse.
And your spouse persistently
refuses to live up
to their marriage covenant.
And in that case,
Paul says,
let it be so.
Let them go.
Now you might be wondering,
what exactly does that look like?
How do I know
whether I'm in verse 15
rather than verse 11?
Well,
if they divorce you
and marry someone else,
there is no future possibility
of being reconciled
in marriage to one another.
If they are sexually unfaithful
and unrepentant,
I think that goes back
to what Jesus was referring to
in Matthew 19.
If they have abandoned you,
definitively,
persistently abandoned you
or otherwise persist
in violating their marriage covenant.
That's what it looks like,
what verse 15 looks like.
The Trinity Baptist elders
paper on divorce says this,
divorce is never commanded
in the Bible,
yet when there is repeated,
unrepentant,
and hard-hearted violation
of the marriage covenant,
divorce may be
an appropriate response
as a last resort.
Only after attempts
to resolve matters privately
as well as with mediation
have produced no resolution.
Now,
if you think you are
in the situation
of verse 15
rather than verse 11,
let me encourage you
not to make
this judgment call
completely on your own.
You need wise counsel
and not just legal
or financial counsel.
many situations
are far more complex
and messy
than I can categorize
in a sermon.
And you need
godly spiritual leaders
who can help you
sort things out
and think things through.
And this is part
of our responsibility
as the elders
of the church
and we take that
very seriously.
And if your marriage
is breaking down,
you need brothers
and sisters
who will walk with you
and pray with you
and help you through
the grief
and anguish
and anger
and confusion
that you may feel.
When your marriage
is breaking apart,
you need the family
of God.
And brothers and sisters
in Christ,
we as the body
of Christ
need to come
alongside people
who are being mistreated
or who have been
abandoned by an
unbelieving partner
just as much
as we come alongside
widows
who are mourning
the death
of their spouse.
Divorce is a kind
of death
and the grief
that follows
is not quickly resolved.
We need to mourn
with those who mourn,
help those who find
themselves in practical
need,
and care for the
children involved.
Now Paul goes on
to say,
in this case,
the brother or sister
is not enslaved.
In other words,
if the unbelieving
partner separates,
you are released
from your marital
obligations.
You are no longer
obligated to pursue
reconciliation because
the implication is
you have done
all that you can.
You have engaged
in a process
and there has been
a definitive
ongoing violation
of the marriage covenant.
And therefore,
I think verse 15
means you are also
free to remarry.
Now,
some Christians believe
that remarriage
is always sinful
unless your first
spouse has died.
On the basis
of verse 15,
especially comparing
it to verse 11,
where Paul seems
to be giving
different counsel
and different situations,
and on the basis
of other reasons,
I think that view
is wrong.
At the same time,
remarriage should not
be entered into
hastily.
After a divorce,
just as after a death
of a spouse,
you need time
to grieve and heal.
You may also need
extended time
to reflect and repent
of the ways
that you contributed
to the failure
of the marriage
before you consider
starting a new one.
And as Paul will
emphasize later
in this chapter,
you may be called
to remain single
like Paul,
and that's not at all
a bad thing.
So,
we've seen God's
creational intent
for marriage
to be faithfully
permanent.
We've seen Paul
speaking to the
complex realities
of living in a
fallen world.
But finally,
the Bible points us
to the redemption
and healing
that comes through
Christ.
Now, maybe you hear
all this
and you think,
I've really blown it.
I've really messed up
in my marriage.
I've caused a lot
of the problems
that we're having.
Maybe you're still
reeling from the
rejection of a divorce.
You're wrestling
with bitterness,
cynicism.
You feel alone
and beaten down.
Maybe you remarried
when you hadn't
completed the process
of pursuing
reconciliation
with a former spouse.
Maybe you can't fix
what went wrong
in the past.
If you've remarried,
you need to remain
faithful to the marriage
you are in now.
But the good news is
Christ came
and Christ died
to bring redemption
and healing
and hope for the future
through his death
and resurrection.
Now, I want to conclude
by sharing two scriptures
that were shared with me
this week
by people in this church
who have been divorced
as I was talking
with them
about preparing
for this sermon.
One person shared
with me
Ephesians 5,
11 to 14,
which says,
Take no part
in the unfruitful
works of darkness,
but instead expose them.
When anything
is exposed
by the light,
it becomes visible.
For anything
that becomes visible
is light.
Therefore,
it says,
Awake,
O sleeper,
and arise
from the dead,
and Christ
will shine on you.
This person said,
We need to expose
our marriages
to the light.
Admit to the issues
that are wrong,
and let the light
of Christ shine in
so we can be transformed.
The church is called
to expose sin,
to call it what it is,
and then help
the victim
and the victimizer
move toward
reconciliation
and resurrection.
You see,
sin never goes away
when it's hiding
in the darkness.
But when we bring
our sin,
whether it's past
or present,
into the light
of Christ,
there's a promise
of healing
and resurrection life.
Paul says,
Wake up,
O sleeper,
rise from the dead.
Yes,
you can rise
from the dead
in Christ
when his light
shines upon you
when you come
into his light.
Second verse
that someone else
shared with me
is Psalm 13,
5-6,
which says,
I have trusted
in your steadfast love
and my heart
shall rejoice
in your salvation.
I will sing
to the Lord
because he has dealt
bountifully with me.
If you've been betrayed
or abandoned,
you need to know
that you have a God
who will never
give up on you,
who will never
stop loving you,
who will never
forsake you,
who will always
keep his promises
and who loves
and cherishes you
as his beloved
son or daughter,
who sings over you
as that verse
in Zephaniah said,
who rejoices over you
with singing.
In Jesus Christ,
you have a spouse.
You have a God
who has become
bone of our bone,
flesh of our flesh,
who has made
marriage vows
to you
and poured out
his life on the cross
to prove
his love
and loyalty
and faithfulness
to you.
He is the one
you can lean on
when no one else
is there.
He is the one
who hears your cries
in the middle
of the night
and his steadfast love
can give you
renewed joy
even after your world
has been torn apart.
That's what we've sung
about this morning.
The deep, deep love
of Jesus.
Great is your faithfulness.
Morning by morning,
new mercies I see.
All I have needed,
your hand has provided.
Great is your faithfulness,
Lord, unto me.
Amen.
If you're not a Christian,
isn't this the kind of love
that we all long for?
The steadfast love of Christ.
Turn to him
and he will be yours
and you will be his
now and forever.
Let's pray.
Amen.
Father, we thank you
for your great
and unending faithfulness,
for your steadfast love,
for your forgiveness,
for our sin and failure,
for the resurrection life
that you have poured out
upon us
through the power
of your Holy Spirit.
Lord, we pray
that we would abide in you,
that your presence
would dwell in us
and among us.
Lord, that we would
experience your redemption
and healing
so that we might display
your steadfast love
in our marriage,
marriages,
or in our singleness.
Lord Jesus,
we thank you
for your
sweet presence
and for your steadfast love.
Amen.
Well, please stand
as the music
and thank you for your
thyme for your
otrasproducts,
but just
one punish
that cose
were
that you
should it be
just
to have
as if
a
that you
have
so
have