The scripture reading today comes from the book of Matthew, chapter 18.
Please follow along on the bulletin, on the screen, or on your own Bible.
Starting in verse 15, we read,
If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone.
If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.
But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you,
that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses.
If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church.
And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.
Truly, I said to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven,
and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.
Again, I said to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask,
it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.
For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.
Then Peter came up and said to him,
Lord, how often will my brothers sin against me, and I forgive him?
As many as seven times?
Jesus said to him,
I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.
Therefore, the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king
who wished to settle accounts with his servants.
When he began to settle,
one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents.
And since he could not pay,
his master ordered him to be sold,
with his wife and children,
and all that he had,
and payment to be made.
So the servant fell on his knees,
imploring him,
Have patience with me,
and I will pay you everything.
And out of pity for him,
the master of that servant released him,
and forgave him the debt.
But when that same servant went out,
he found one of his fellow servants
who owed him a hundred denarii.
And seizing him,
he began to choke him, saying,
Pay what you owe.
So his fellow servant fell down
and pleaded with him,
Have patience with me,
and I will pay you.
He refused,
and went and put him in prison
until he should pay the debt.
When his fellow servants saw
what had taken place,
they were greatly distressed.
And they went and reported to their master
all that had taken place.
Then his master summoned him
and said to him,
You wicked servant,
I forgave you all that debt
because you pleaded with me.
And should not you have had mercy
on your fellow servant
as I have mercy on you?
And in anger,
his master delivered him
to the jailers
until he should pay all his debt.
So, also,
my heavenly Father
will do to every one of you
if you do not forgive your brother
from your heart.
This is the word of God.
Great.
Thank you, Anastasia.
Well, let's come before our Father
in prayer
as we look at this passage together.
Lord Jesus Christ,
Heavenly Father,
Holy Spirit,
we come before you this morning.
We open up our,
not only our hands,
but our hearts.
We want to hear from you.
We want you to speak to us, God.
Won't you minister to us?
Won't you heal us?
Won't you encourage us?
Won't you call us to yourself?
God, you know where each one of us
are at this morning.
You know our joys and our delights,
our pains and our fears.
Father, won't your word come and speak to us?
Lord, open up our hearts
as we open up your word, we pray.
In your wonderful name.
Amen.
If you have recently returned to Hong Kong
from being away for the whole summer
or the whole of 2022,
welcome back.
EJ and others, great to have you.
But you might be forgiven
in not recognizing half of the church.
And the reason is because
over the last six months or so,
there's been so much change at Watermark.
We've had to say goodbye
to a whole bunch of people.
Chris and Jen, Chris and Fiona,
Echo, Ryan and Catherine this week
went to Singapore.
We're going to be saying goodbye
to some more people
in the next couple of months.
But we've also had a whole lot
of new people coming,
which has been wonderful.
And that's been really exciting,
getting to know some new people
in the church.
It's been really great.
And so there's been lots of change.
One of the new people
that I hope does,
I hope, let me put it this way.
One of the guests
that I hope never comes to Watermark,
but may, but I hope
we're going to do everything we can
to shut him out,
is a guest called Mr. Conflict.
Mr. Conflict.
What do you do when conflict
comes to the church?
Well, for a number of us here,
you became a Christian at Watermark,
and Watermark is maybe
the only church that you know.
And my hope is that
it's been a good experience.
Hopefully you've been welcomed
with uncommon grace and humility.
But we also know that
that's not always the reality in church.
Sometimes at Watermark,
but maybe at another church as well,
many of us have experienced pain
and difficulty and conflict in the church.
In Matthew 16,
that we looked at a few weeks ago,
Jesus says,
I will build my church.
And in chapter 18,
which we looked at last week
and this morning,
Jesus is explaining his church,
how it's going to operate
and how his church is going to work.
And one of the things that we see
is that the church is made up
of people who are both saints,
but also sinners,
but also sufferers,
all at the same time.
So the church,
Christians are made up of
saints and sinners and sufferers.
The word saint doesn't mean
someone who is morally perfect
and got it all together.
The word saint means
someone who is set apart
to be part of Christ's kingdom,
belongs to Jesus.
And that's what the church
is made up of.
But the church is also
made up of sinners.
We heard this last week
where Niels explained to us,
all of us are needy sinners.
We are fallen.
We are broken.
We don't have it all together.
Oh, but the church
is also made up of sufferers
because we live in a broken world
and we feel the effect
and the scars of other people's sin
and brokenness in our lives.
And so the church is made up
of sinners and saints and sufferers
and not just as a collection,
but each one of us
carry that ourselves.
And so what that means is
the church does not consist
of those that are perfect people,
but those that are forgiven people.
Does that make sense?
And so in a church family
like Watermark,
hopefully as wonderful as it is,
it's not perfect.
At best, we're made to be
a foretaste of heaven,
a picture of glory in some ways,
this uncommon unity
that Claire spoke about.
But we're not perfect.
We're still going to make mistakes.
And sometimes that means
this conflict is going to arise.
And so in this passage,
Jesus is going to tell us two things.
He's going to say,
on the one hand,
don't be surprised
when there's relational sin
or conflict in the church
because the church is not perfect.
It's made up of imperfect people.
And so don't be surprised
when that happens as if,
oh my goodness,
I can't believe this.
But on the other hand,
Jesus says,
don't be okay with it.
Don't tolerate it.
Don't say,
oh well, you know,
hey, that's the way it is.
I guess we all just sinners,
so okay.
So don't be surprised,
but don't be okay with it.
And the reason is
because conflict and sin
is such a terrible thing.
It causes such breakdown
of relationship.
It causes such hurt and pain.
Sin always breaks relationship.
One with God,
vertically,
but also horizontally
with each other.
And so that's why
in our passage last week,
if you'll remember,
Neil's preached in verse six,
Jesus says,
if somebody causes
one of these little ones,
remember who the little ones?
They're not the children.
They're all of us.
If somebody causes
one of these little ones to sin,
it would be better
for a millstone
to be tied around his neck
and thrown into the sea.
That's how serious
Jesus is with sin.
He says,
if your right hand
causes you to sin,
hey, maybe you should
cut it off.
If your left foot
causes you to sin,
maybe cut it off.
It's better to end
into life maimed
than to have two limbs
and go to hell.
Jesus says,
sin is serious
and it's terrible.
And yet he says,
don't be overly surprised
when it happens
because the church
is not made up
of perfect people.
It's made up
of forgiven people.
Well,
in our passage today,
Matthew 18,
the question is this.
So how should we handle
relational conflict
in the church?
There's two stories
in our passage
and they both start off
with almost
the identical sentence.
If you've got your Bible,
look at verse 15
with me.
Jesus says,
if your brother
sins against you.
And then verse 21,
Peter starts off
the next section
saying this,
Lord,
how many times
should I allow
my brother
to sin against me
and I forgive him?
Two sentences
that start off
the two different sections
almost identically.
And so the question is this,
how do we handle
sin in the church?
Relational conflict.
When Jesus is talking
about a brother here,
he's not talking about
your biological brother,
he's talking about
another believer,
right?
A brother or sister
in Christ.
Friends,
how do we handle
it when somebody
lets you down?
When somebody treats you
in a way that you feel
dishonored
or embarrassed by them
or shamed by them?
Maybe you feel like
somebody has spoken
about you behind your back.
Or maybe somebody
says something
and then you find out
actually there's a whole
other story,
the reality is different
and you feel like
they've been dishonest
with you.
How do we handle
these kind of difficulties?
Somebody promises you
something and then
lets you down
and makes a lame excuse.
How do we handle
relational difficulty
in the church?
Well,
before we get to Jesus,
let's think about this.
Let me suggest
a couple of ways
we could handle it.
One way is you could say,
I'll trust you
the first time,
but thereafter
you let me down,
that's it, right?
Do you know the saying,
if you hurt me once,
shame on you.
You hurt me twice,
shame on me.
I don't know if you know
that saying, right?
It means I'll trust you
the first time,
but if you hurt me
and I trust you again,
that's my fault
for trusting you.
So maybe you feel like,
I'll trust you the first time,
but you've got one shot at it,
don't let me down.
After that,
I'm going to withdraw
and just retreat.
Maybe you could feel like,
hey,
I've been hurt down
by people in the past,
maybe my parents
or a colleague
or a friend,
maybe the pastor
at my previous church.
Actually,
so I'm going to build up
my wall around me
and I'm going to just
keep my distance from people
and not really let anyone in.
I don't know if you know
the song by Paul Simon
back in the 80s,
I Am a Rock.
He says,
I have no need for friendship.
Friendship causes pain.
If I never loved,
I never would have cried.
So I built up the walls.
I am a rock.
I am an island.
For a rock feels no pain
and an island never cries.
Maybe that's how you feel, right?
I've been hurt in the past.
I'm going to build up my walls.
I'm not going to let anybody in.
Maybe there's another way
to handle difficulty
and that is
to take the advice
of social media.
What does social media
tell us these days?
If any relationship
causes you stress
or anxiety,
it's a toxic relationship,
you cut them off, right?
That's the thinking
of our world, right?
Toxic relationships
are bad for you.
That person's dead to me.
I don't have time
for toxic relationships.
Someone causes you
stress and anxiety,
you just cut them off.
How should we as a church
handle relational difficulty
when conflict comes to church?
Well, Jesus is going to give us
two bits of wisdom
in this passage
that go right against
the grain of popular culture.
And so let's see
what Jesus says
in our passage.
The first thing Jesus says
is this.
Don't hide from
relational conflict.
Talk about it.
Don't ignore it.
Sweep it under the rug.
Pretend it doesn't exist.
No, go talk about it.
Address it.
Look at verse 15
with me
in your Bible.
Neil spoke about this
last week,
but let's look at it
again briefly.
Verse 15,
Jesus says,
If your brother
sins against you,
then put on a friendly face
at church
and pretend
nothing has happened
in order to maintain
the peace.
No, no,
he doesn't say that.
He says,
No, if your brother
sins against you,
go and talk to him
about it.
Tell him his fault,
his offense,
between him
and you alone.
Now,
the way that Matthew
writes this,
it sounds pretty
black and white, right?
Somebody does something,
you just go to them
and say,
Hey, Buster,
you messed up.
Let's sort it out.
Well, in reality,
life's not often
that black and white, right?
It's not always
that clear.
And so maybe
a better way
of talking about it
is if somebody,
if you feel like
somebody's hurt you
or offended you
or done something
against you,
a good way to handle it
is to go and say,
Hey, I feel like
this has happened.
Am I understanding
the situation right?
Or,
my impression is that
you said this,
but then this happened
and that feels like
there's a disconnect.
Can we talk about this?
So rather than just
going and saying,
You sucker,
this is what you did,
there's a way
to approach it
that requires humility
and wisdom
and grace.
But Jesus' point here
is don't just sweep it
under the rug,
pretend nothing's happened,
actually go and talk
to your brother
or your sister about it.
See, I feel like
this might have happened.
Can we talk about this?
And so our job
is not to be
the chief prosecuting officer
in the church
to go around
telling everybody
their fault.
No, no,
that's just going to
make people defensive.
If we do it
with humility,
people will have humility
to hear it
and receive it.
But Jesus' point
is this,
when something comes up,
when someone has wronged you,
go and talk to them
about it.
Now,
why should we do this?
Is it because
we want to put people
in their place?
Is it a bit too much
pride in the church
and so we've just
got to humble people
a little bit,
bring them down
a notch or two?
Or maybe the reason
is because
actually my reputation
has been tattered
and I want to restore
my reputation
in the community.
No, no,
actually look at
what Jesus says here,
verse 15,
because if he listens
to you,
you've gained your brother
or your sister.
Jesus' point here,
his motivation,
is love.
It's to restore
the relationship,
to restore trust,
to rebuild
the relationship
that's been hurt.
The goal here
is to love someone.
It's a form of love
to honor them enough
to go and talk to them
and say,
hey, I know this is difficult,
but I feel like
this has happened.
Can we talk about this?
It's the same thing
Jesus says
in the section before,
right?
He says,
if someone's got
a hundred sheep
and one wanders off,
it's easy to think,
ah, it's just one,
I've still got 99.
Actually,
go and leave those 99
where they are
and you go after the one.
Friends,
it's easy to think,
I've got 99 other friends
in church,
it's okay if I lose
one or two.
No, no, no.
No, leave those 99,
they'll still be there.
You go after the one,
say,
hey, can we talk about this?
Now,
the reality is
that sometimes
it doesn't always go
as well as that,
right?
You go and you talk
to someone
and you say,
hey, can we talk about this?
And they push back
and they don't want
to talk about it
or they get defensive
and they say,
no, it's not the case
or they maybe twist it on you
and say,
actually, it's your fault.
If you hadn't done this,
I wouldn't have done this.
And what does Jesus say?
Do we just say,
okay, well, I tried.
I guess I'll just avoid
that person.
No, look what he says.
He says,
go and take somebody with you.
Maybe take a friend
or a CG leader
or an elder
and say,
hey, I really want
to talk through this.
I really want to store
the relationship.
Can we talk through
what happened here?
And eventually,
that person still
doesn't want to talk about it
or maybe the members
need to get involved
and say,
hey, when we've joined
this church,
we agreed this is how
we're going to handle things
and this isn't how
we handle it.
Let's really talk about it.
But Jesus' point is here.
When there's relational difficulty,
you feel like someone's hurt you
or let you down,
don't ignore it.
Don't pretend it.
Go and talk to them.
And the reason is this.
Because relational conflict
is like food
that's going moldy
at the back of the fridge.
Right?
Do you know what that is like?
You open the fridge
and there's some noodles
from like three weeks ago
and there's some stuff
growing on it
or you untapped the milk
and you can smell it
and it smells terrible.
Oh, it's so easy
just to close the fridge
and leave it to someone else.
Especially if you live
in like a commune
or a digs
with other students, right?
Say, I'm just going to leave it.
It'll be someone else's problem.
But it doesn't go away, does it?
It's just going to get worse.
Or even more serious,
imagine you go to the doctor
and you say,
I'm just not feeling well.
And he does a scan
and he finds a growth
or a lump
and he feels like,
I really want to go
on holiday next week.
This is not very convenient.
I'm just going to pretend
it's not there.
That's not going to help things.
It's not going to disappear
on its own.
It doesn't just vanish.
No, no, no.
You deal with it.
You move towards it.
Hey, can I tell you
where I see this the most often
in my life?
With my marriage to Claire, right?
Sometimes I know
you'd never believe it,
but just hypothetically, right?
Something happens between us
and there's some misunderstanding
and I feel like,
and then I tell myself,
I don't want to avoid,
I don't want to deal with this.
I'm just going to avoid it.
And I tell myself,
it's not a big deal.
It's just,
if I ignore it,
it's going to go away.
And what happens
after two or three days,
I'm thinking about it
and I start to think,
I said this
and then she said this
and then I said
we're going to do this
and then she went and did this
and I'm replaying it
over in my mind
and I'm telling myself,
it's not a big deal,
it's just going to go away.
But what's happening,
it's still there
and then two days later,
something small happens
and what do you think
comes out of my mouth?
A whole volcano
of frustration
and emotion, right?
And in that moment,
I wish,
oh my goodness,
I wish just two days ago,
I'd said,
hey love,
I feel like,
I feel like there's something
between us
or hey love,
I feel misunderstood,
can we talk about this?
I wish I had done it
and I regret,
I didn't.
Friends,
let's not let that happen
in the church.
Let's not stew on things
or bury things
or leave them unaddressed.
Don't come to church
with a fake smile,
pretending everything's wonderful
and in our heart,
actually we are seething.
No,
let's talk about it.
Let's address it.
Let's restore the conflict.
Let's humbly,
graciously,
love one another
enough to talk about it.
Now,
in the second passage,
second story,
Jesus gives us
another bit of wisdom
and this is even harder
and Jesus' wisdom is this.
Firstly,
we said,
don't hide from it,
talk about it.
Secondly,
Jesus says,
don't hold on to it
but release it.
Look at verse 21 with me.
Peter says,
Lord,
how often will my brother
or sister
sin against me
and I forgive them?
Now,
that's a great question,
right?
That's a great question.
How many times
should somebody come to you
and say,
listen,
I've messed up,
please forgive me
and you say,
it's okay,
it's behind us.
Now,
the rabbis in Jesus' day
based on some scripture
in the Old Testament
thought three was a good number,
right?
Amos 1 and 2.
So they said,
three times you forgive your brother,
the fourth time,
that's it.
They're not listening.
Well,
Peter's a very generous guy
and so he says,
seven times,
Lord.
And look at what Jesus says.
I tell you not seven times
but 77 times
or the Greek could be
70 times seven times,
right?
Jesus' point here
is not that you keep on
forgiving somebody
until you get to
number 491,
right?
and then finally
entitled to take revenge.
490 strikes
and then you're out.
No,
Jesus' point here
is don't keep score.
Don't even count.
If somebody comes to you
and says,
hey,
I messed up,
I'm really sorry,
just forgive them.
Let it go.
Jesus' point here
is if someone
lets you down
and messes up
and they really come
and ask for forgiveness,
don't say,
well,
this is the fourth time,
this is the seventh time.
If they really are sorry,
let it be to you
like this is the very first time
that it's happening.
Now,
Jesus here
is not talking about
brushing aside
serious
cases of abuse,
right?
If somebody comes
and abuses you
physically,
emotionally,
sexually,
Jesus is not saying,
ah,
whatever,
just forgive them,
you know,
you're a Christian,
just let it go.
No,
no,
friends,
when there's cases of that,
you may need to walk
with a professional,
a counselor,
there's deep,
deep pain involved,
right?
And so Jesus is not
just brushing it off
saying,
ah,
whatever.
But Jesus is also
not saying that
forgiving somebody
is the same
as excusing somebody.
And that's an important
difference,
right?
Excusing somebody
is saying
there's some reason,
there's some
extenuating circumstances
why they're not
really responsible
for what happened.
So,
for instance,
right,
you've got a meeting
with somebody
and they
don't arrive
for your meeting.
They just don't show up.
And they phone you
and they say,
I'm so sorry,
it's my fault
entirely,
please forgive me.
Okay,
they're asking for forgiveness,
right?
But if somebody phones you
and says,
I'm so sorry,
please forgive me,
just before I left
the office last night,
my boss gave me
this huge presentation.
And so I worked
until like 2 a.m.
And just when I was
going to bed,
my dog got sick
and started vomiting
all over the couch.
And I,
it was an emergency,
so I had to take my dog
to the vet
and you'll never believe
what happened.
I got to the vet
and there was somebody else
with their pet lion
and their lion
was attacking my dog
and I didn't get to sleep
until like 8 o'clock
this morning.
I'm so sorry.
What are they saying?
They're not asking
for forgiveness,
they're asking
to be excused,
right?
They're saying,
it's not really my fault.
Here are all the reasons
why I'm not responsible.
But when somebody's
asking to be excused,
what they're really saying
is the offense
that I've caused
is not that big
or it didn't really hurt you
or it's not really my fault.
But that's not what
Jesus is talking about here.
Excusing somebody
is saying the offense
wasn't their fault.
Forgiving them
is releasing them
even though it was their fault.
Jesus says we need
to forgive somebody
who sins against us.
He's not asking us
just to excuse them.
He's not asking us
to say,
well,
I guess it wasn't
really that bad.
Just, you know,
move on.
He's saying no,
it was bad.
It was painful.
What they did was wrong.
But can you find
in your heart
to release them anyway?
When Jesus talks
about forgiveness here,
he's talking about
what Tim Keller says,
refusing to nurse
the grudge
in our heart
or replay the wrongdoing
over in our mind,
right?
in our hearts
and our minds.
C.S. Lewis says,
to forgive somebody
is to make every effort
to kill
every taste
of resentment
or bitterness
in my heart,
every desire
to pay back,
humiliate,
or to see the person
suffer.
It's to release
the moral debt
that that person owes me
for their wrongdoing.
Now, of course,
that doesn't mean
that there's no consequences
to their wrongdoing.
Somebody really lets you down
again and again and again.
It may take a while
to rebuild the trust.
It doesn't mean
that you just necessarily
trust them straight away,
but you can release them
from the moral debt
that they owe you.
Somebody talks about you
behind your back
or lies to you
again and again,
there's consequences to that.
Somebody does something
really egregious,
they may go to jail
and have to face
the consequences.
So forgiving them
doesn't mean
not facing consequences,
but it means releasing them
of the bitterness
in our own hearts
the resentment
and the moral debt
that they owe us.
Jesus is calling us
to kill every taste
of resentment
in our hearts
and to release the person
from our hearts.
Now, on the one hand,
as we spoke about earlier,
popular culture says,
hey, if somebody hurts you,
you cut them off, right?
They're causing you
stress and anxiety,
just find other friends.
On the other hand,
there's another approach
that popular culture has
and it says this,
to forgive somebody
is the best thing
that you can do
because that's actually
the way that you
are going to be free
from the pain
that they're causing you.
In other words,
culture tells us
if you hold on
to resentment
and bitterness,
it's like drinking a poison
that's only going to cause
your own heart pain
and it's better to release them
so that you can be free.
And that is definitely true.
I don't know if you know
the famous phrase, right?
Holding on to bitterness
is like drinking poison
and waiting for someone else
to die.
And that's definitely true.
If you refuse
to forgive somebody,
you are inextricably tied
to that person,
even if you don't want to be.
Even if that person
moves to the other side
of the world
or even if they pass away
and die,
you are still bound to them
if you can't forgive them.
And so that is true,
but that's not Jesus' motivation.
Jesus gives another motivation
in this passage.
Jesus gives us a reason
to practice radical,
undeserved forgiveness
and grace,
not because of what
it will do to us,
but because of what
He has already done for us.
Jesus compels us
to forgive those
that have hurt us,
not because of what
you can do for yourself,
but because of what
He has done for you.
And so Jesus tells
this parable
that Anastasia read to us.
He says there's this guy
who owes 10,000 talents.
Now in the first century,
a talent was the highest
currency available.
It was the highest
unit of currency.
And 10,000
was the highest
Greek numeral.
So Jesus here is saying
an obscene amount
of money, right?
Robert Gundry,
one of the commentators,
says a gazillion dollars.
Okay,
so that's how much
this guy earns.
So here's a guy,
he owes a gazillion dollars,
more than you can
even fathom.
And one day,
his loan is recalled.
And he's doomed, right?
There's nothing
he can do about it.
He can't pay it back.
He can't trade his way
out of his debt.
He can't sell himself
into slavery
and pay off his debt.
There's nothing he can do.
He's dead.
He's doomed.
And so the man
falls on his knees
and he says,
Lord, have mercy
with me.
Have patience with me.
I will repay you
everything I owe.
Which is a lie.
He can't repay it.
He's never going
to repay it back.
And amazingly,
this king,
this master,
for some reason,
decides to give him
grace and mercy.
And he doesn't just
give him more time
to get his affairs
in order
or to restructure
his loan.
He says,
do you know what?
Take your debt
that you owe me
and write it off.
He takes the contract
note and he tears it up.
He completely just
writes off
this guy's debt.
He says,
you owe me nothing.
Insane, right?
Amazing.
Now,
a gazillion dollars
doesn't really make sense to us.
So picture yourself
in this situation.
Imagine
you've got a credit card
and you're not really careful
and you spend wildly on it
and you do a whole lot
of crazy things
and you make some
really bad decisions
and you feel like
you're wealthy
and you get into
tons of debt.
And before you know it,
your credit card statement
says you're half a million dollars
in debt,
$500,000 in debt.
Maybe even more,
maybe a million dollars,
okay?
A million dollars you owe.
But in addition to that,
you actually bought
an apartment
a few years ago
when times were good
and you mortgaged it
up to the hilt
and now you own
$20 million on your apartment
and you just lost your job
and now you owe
over $20 million,
you've got no job,
no income,
you're in deep trouble,
right?
And so one day
your bank manager
phones you
and says,
hey,
we need to talk about
your loan,
the money that you owe us
and you don't know
what to say.
And so you say,
listen,
I'm really busy,
I'll call you later
and you don't call back
and he phones
and you avoid
his phone calls
and eventually
he comes around
to your house,
right?
And you say,
listen,
I'm in deep trouble,
right?
I don't know
how I'm going to pay you,
$20 million.
I don't know
but I'll make a plan.
Anyway,
the next day
you get a phone call
and your bank manager
says,
I'm feeling generous today,
I'm going to write off
that million dollars
that you owe us.
You go online
to your credit card
and you see
the total
says zero.
Unbelievable.
Oh my goodness.
I mean,
isn't that a good thing?
Well,
you phone your manager
and you say,
that's incredible
and he says,
oh by the way,
your mortgage
is gone as well.
It's zero.
He's cancelled
your debt.
I mean,
$20 million.
I would feel
pretty happy,
pretty free.
The chain on your,
the burden on your shoulders
is gone,
right?
Well,
that's what's happened
to this guy
and more.
And so,
he walks down the street
and he's dancing
and he's singing
and he sees this guy
who owes him $5,000
and he says,
Phoebe,
you owe me $5,000
and he goes up to her
and he says,
when are you going
to pay me?
Sorry,
Phoebe,
picked on you.
He sees his friend Bob,
right?
He says,
Bob,
when are you going
to pay me?
$5,000.
You owe me,
you said you're going
to pay me
and his friend comes
and says,
hey,
my wife's in hospital.
I've just had to pay.
I'm getting paid tomorrow.
I'll pay you this week.
And what does he do?
He says,
you lying scoundrel.
And he takes his Bob
and he throws him
on the floor
and he starts punching him
and kicking him
and drags him off
to the police station.
Well,
look at what Jesus says.
Jesus says,
the master,
in his anger,
the master who forgave
his debt,
will deliver such a man
to the torturers
until all his debt
is paid.
Why?
Because here's a man
that's received radical,
radical mercy
and that radical mercy
he's received
is disconnected
from the rest of his life
and he does not know
how to extend
even a fraction
of that mercy
to others.
Friends,
you see what Jesus
is saying here?
Jesus is saying that
if you're a follower of Jesus,
we were like the servant.
We were in the deepest
debt possible.
And like the servant,
we couldn't even come close
to paying off our debt.
And so like the servant,
the only thing
that we could do
was to get on our knees
before our father
and say,
Lord,
have mercy.
Lord,
have mercy.
Friends,
Jesus says that
if you're a Christian
this morning,
you're not a Christian
because of anything
you did to repay your debt.
no human being
could pay back
the debt that they owed.
No human being
could merit
or earn God's grace.
The only way
that you become a Christian
is to cling
onto that old
rugged cross
and say,
God,
have mercy.
The only chance
we have
is to plead
for the undeserved
mercy of Jesus.
Miroslav Wolf
says this,
forgiveness flounders
when we not only
exclude those
that have hurt us
from the community
of humanity,
but we exclude
ourselves
from the community
of sinners.
That's a profound thought.
Forgiveness fails
when we look at others
and we say,
there's something
less than human about you.
There's something
different about you.
But we also look
at ourselves
and we say,
there's something
different about me.
All those suckers
out there are sinners
but there's something
different about me.
And so C.S. Lewis
famously said,
to be a Christian
means to forgive
the inexcusable
because in Christ
God forgave
the inexcusable
in me.
Friends,
you know that
that's true for me,
your pastor.
I am infinitely worse
than you can imagine.
Some of you know
a lot of bad stuff
about me.
You don't even know
the beginning of it.
Jesus Christ
forgave
the inexcusable
crap in my life
and therefore
Jesus says,
Kevin,
can you extend
a little bit of mercy
to those that
have let you down?
In Romans 2,
verse 4,
there's this
incredible verse.
It's kind of like
a bedrock verse
for our church.
He says this,
don't you know
that the kindness
of God
is meant to lead us
to repentance?
That's a foundational
verse for our church.
Friends,
Christians are those
who live lives
of confession
and repentance
daily.
Why?
Not because of
God's severity.
It's not God's harshness
that leads me
to repentance.
It's not God's
severity
that causes me
to fall on my knees.
It's His kindness.
It's His compassion.
It's His tenderheartedness.
When I see
how God has treated
a rebel like me,
it causes me
to get on my knees
and say,
oh God,
I'm so grateful.
Come and change me.
But do you see
what Jesus is saying
in this story?
The kindness of God
not only leads us
to repentance,
it also leads us
to forgiveness.
To forgive somebody
is to give them
what they do not deserve.
To give undeserved mercy
in response
to the undeserved harm
that they've caused us.
And that means
that forgiveness
is always extremely costly.
It costs you
your right to be angry.
It costs you
your right
to vindication.
It costs you
your right
to a reputation
in the community.
It costs you
your right
to feel like a victim.
To forgive somebody
is always extremely costly.
And yet,
for those who are in Christ
who have experienced
the kindness of Jesus,
it's no cost at all.
And the reason is
because Jesus
has not only forgiven
our debt,
He's given us Himself.
Friends,
if Jesus has given you
a new name
and a new identity
and a name
that's welcome
into His family
and a purpose
and a hope
and a future
and a new track record,
if Jesus has given you
Himself,
what are you and I
looking to that person
that is so hard
to forgive
to give us
that Jesus Himself
has not really given us?
And so in Ephesians 4,
the Apostle Paul says,
he writes to these
young Christians
and he says,
put away all bitterness.
Put away anger.
Put away the malice.
Be kind to one another.
Tenderhearted.
Forgive one another
just as God in Christ
has forgiven you.
Friends,
when we are unaware
or we forget
our profound,
daily,
ongoing need
for forgiveness,
we lose not only
the pattern
but also the power
to forgive those
that hurt us.
Jesus' forgiveness of us
is not only the pattern,
it's not only the law,
it's also the power,
the motivation
to forgive those
that have hurt us.
In Jesus Christ
and His grace,
we know that we have
all that we need,
undeservedly so.
And so we can release those
that have undeservedly
hurt us
or taken from us.
And so friends,
if you're a Christian
this morning
and you feel
the deep pain
of being wronged
or being hurt,
can I ask you,
can I urge you
to come to Jesus?
I can't heal that pain.
I can't repay back
what has been taken
from you.
But Jesus Christ can.
And He'll give you
more than what's been
taken from you.
Friends,
can I urge you
to come to Him
this morning?
Come in your pain,
come in your tears,
come in your agony,
and ask Christ
to wash you
with His grace.
Friends,
in the church
we have both sinners
and saints
and sufferers.
Not only across
the church family
but within each one of us.
And that means
that we shouldn't be
surprised or shocked
when things don't go
perfectly well
in the church.
And yet at the same time
because we're meant
to be a taste of heaven,
we shouldn't be okay
with it.
We should mourn it
and grieve it.
And so how do we
handle it
when someone wrongs us?
How do we handle
conflict in church?
Well, we graciously
and humbly
move towards that person.
And we say,
I want to restore
the relationship.
Can we talk about it?
But we don't just
go towards them
to do that.
We also go towards them
with unfathomable grace
because of the grace
that we've received
in Christ Jesus.
Friends,
I'd love to pray
for us this morning
but Natalie,
do you want to come
and lead us
in song?
We're going to pray
in a few minutes time
but before we do that
I want to just take a,
give us a minute or two
just to reflect
and just to sit quietly
and just to think.
And maybe as we do that
maybe I can actually
just pray
and ask God the Holy Spirit
to speak to us.
friends,
what has God
been saying to you
this morning?
If you're a human being
the chances are
somebody's hurt you
or let you down.
If you've lived
for more than five years
in this world,
more than five minutes,
somebody's caused
some offense,
somebody's treated
you unfairly.
Friends,
I really am convinced
that God wants
to heal some of us
this morning.
He wants us
to set us free.
He wants us
to demonstrate
the undeserved kindness
that maybe those people
don't deserve
but He wants us
to
be free
and to receive
His grace
so that we can
extend grace.
And so God,
the Holy Spirit,
I ask you God,
won't you come
and speak to us?
Won't you come
and heal us?
Won't you come
and minister to us?
I pray.
Amen.
Thank you.
In Psalm 139, the psalmist writes,
Search me, O God.
Know my heart.
Try me and know my thoughts.
See if there's any grievous way in me.
Lead me in the way of the everlasting life.
Father, we make that our prayer today.
God, come and lead us in the way of everlasting life.
Come and set us free, God.
Amen.
Jesus, we confess that we need you this morning.
We need you because we need your grace.
But we also need you, God, to give us the ability to give grace to others.
Amen.
In Luke chapter 4, Jesus starts his ministry, and he quotes from Isaiah 61.
He says,
The Spirit of the Lord is upon me because he has anointed me to proclaim good news.
He sent me to proclaim liberty to the captives, to set free those that are oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor.
Father, Jesus, won't you come and set us free?
Won't you come and minister to our hearts?
Father, we confess it's so hard to sometimes let go of pain in the past.
It's so hard, God, to forgive those that have hurt us or wronged us.
Jesus, we pray that as the gospel gets into our heart and as we reflect on the amazing and good news of the gospel,
that you also change us and help us and heal us and help us to be gracious to those around you.
Jesus, come and have your way, we pray.
Amen.