WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.660 We're going to look at this together. Before we do, we're going to pray and to ask our 00:00:05.660 --> 00:00:06.060 prayer. 00:00:11.460 --> 00:00:18.080 I pray for Tom Campbell, who's up in service today, who's been preaching in the church 00:00:18.080 --> 00:00:18.760 there today. 00:00:21.460 --> 00:00:29.560 Our Father God, we thank you so much for your word. We thank you for its great big story 00:00:29.559 --> 00:00:39.320 of a God who has come to pursue us, to love us so that we might belong to you. We thank 00:00:39.320 --> 00:00:44.600 you that you are generous in your love towards us. And we thank you that you are generous 00:00:44.600 --> 00:00:51.159 in all the gifts that you give to us. And we ask now that you would give to us and pour 00:00:51.159 --> 00:00:58.960 out your Spirit upon us so that we may hear and understand, be able to apply these truths 00:00:58.960 --> 00:01:06.719 to our life, whatever status we may find ourselves in. We pray for those who are speaking your 00:01:06.719 --> 00:01:14.960 word all around this country today. We pray for Tom and Sherlock. We pray for other churches 00:01:14.960 --> 00:01:22.719 in this city, in this campus. We pray for ourselves now as we listen to your word that you would 00:01:22.719 --> 00:01:30.480 give to each speaker your spirit, that they may speak clearly, communicate effectively, 00:01:30.480 --> 00:01:36.719 so that hearts will be challenged, people changed, churches built up and encouraged, that we may 00:01:36.719 --> 00:01:42.719 go on living the way he has called us to live. So please, Lord, make our time together in encouraging 00:01:42.719 --> 00:01:52.480 one, challenge us, but also change us. We ask these things in Jesus' name. Amen. 00:01:52.480 --> 00:02:03.439 So last week we looked at marriage and today we're going to be looking at singleness. So if you do 00:02:03.439 --> 00:02:08.480 have questions afterwards, please do talk to me. You might agree with everything and you might want 00:02:08.480 --> 00:02:15.680 to discuss it out and we can do that over-copping or talk to your neighbour about it. I'm sure you've all 00:02:15.680 --> 00:02:24.879 heard of the comedy film, Bridget Jones Diary. Well, the film starts with Bridget reading from her diary. 00:02:25.840 --> 00:02:34.240 This is what it says. It all began on New Year's Day, in my 32nd year of being single. Once again, 00:02:34.240 --> 00:02:41.760 I found myself on my own and going to my mother's annual turkey curry buffet. Every year she tries to fix me 00:02:41.759 --> 00:02:50.000 up with some bushy-haired middle-aged four and I feared this year would be no exception. Bridget is 00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:56.560 single and all her friends are either married or they have partners and she feels left out and 00:02:56.560 --> 00:03:03.840 deplanious. And with ongoing pressure from her friends and from her mother, she writes in her diary, 00:03:03.840 --> 00:03:11.840 the story. New Year's resolution one, lose weight, stop smoking, drink less than 14 units of alcohol a week. 00:03:12.879 --> 00:03:19.840 New Year's resolution two, always put last night's panties in the washing basket and equally important, 00:03:20.400 --> 00:03:28.159 we'll find nice sensible boyfriends to go out with. And the rest of the story unfolds, Bridget goes looking for her man. 00:03:28.159 --> 00:03:38.639 But the film is putting across a message. Being single, we are told, is not an option. If you don't have a partner, 00:03:38.639 --> 00:03:44.240 or at least someone who you can regularly sleep with, well, there must be something wrong with you. 00:03:44.879 --> 00:03:54.159 It's just not acceptable. The pressure is huge for single people to be linked to someone. You must either be 00:03:54.159 --> 00:04:01.520 in a relationship or pursuing a relationship or ending one because you've fallen for someone else. 00:04:02.879 --> 00:04:10.879 And it seems to me that Christian culture has become no different. The pressure that people are put under, 00:04:10.879 --> 00:04:20.159 single people, to be in a relationship is huge. He's such a great guy. How come he's still single? 00:04:20.160 --> 00:04:27.280 There must be something wrong. They'd make a great couple, wouldn't they? We'll have to try and get him to get him. 00:04:28.480 --> 00:04:33.440 Is she still on her own? Maybe we should pray and actually find something. 00:04:35.280 --> 00:04:44.000 Somehow we have bought into the world's culture that to be single is to be abnormal. It's almost seen as a curse, 00:04:44.000 --> 00:04:53.920 as a disease that you're carrying around. If you really want to get on in life, then you need to settle down and get married. 00:04:55.759 --> 00:05:04.000 Now such thinking is not only wrong, it is sensitive, it's unloving, and above all else it's safe to understand 00:05:04.000 --> 00:05:14.319 God's use of God's use of being single. Well far from being abnormal, singleness is actually a gift from God. 00:05:15.120 --> 00:05:17.439 Look at chapter 7 and verse 7. 00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:22.000 Paul is writing through the church. He says, 00:05:22.000 --> 00:05:32.720 I wish that all men were as I am. Now let me just pause there. The Apostle Paul, who you will know of, who wrote a good deal of the New Testament, 00:05:34.639 --> 00:05:43.120 was actually married at one time. Well how do we know that? Well he was a member of the Sanhedrin, and you couldn't be a member of the Sanhedrin without being married. 00:05:43.120 --> 00:05:51.120 Now within Jewish culture, it was more than likely that everybody was, but particularly because of his position he would have been married. 00:05:52.639 --> 00:06:04.079 So somewhere along the line, Paul started as a married man, but now he's on his own. Either his wife has died, or perhaps she left him when he became a Christian. 00:06:04.079 --> 00:06:12.399 We don't know. But we do know that right now he is. So he says in verse 7, I wish that all men were as I am. 00:06:13.519 --> 00:06:20.879 But each person has their own gift from God. One has this gift, and another has that. 00:06:21.439 --> 00:06:28.399 So he's saying very simply that some have been given the gift of marriage, and some have been given the gift of singleness. 00:06:30.240 --> 00:06:37.759 Our status, whether we are married or single, doesn't make us more superior or less inferior. 00:06:37.759 --> 00:06:45.839 Our status, whatever situation we are in, is a gift from God. So rather than a curse to be put up with, 00:06:46.399 --> 00:06:54.879 singleness, like marriage, is to be welcomed and accepted as something good from our heavenly father. 00:06:54.879 --> 00:07:01.360 In fact, we should be very careful to make sure that our status never defines us. 00:07:01.360 --> 00:07:07.360 What sense is the greater gift, my relationship to Christ? 00:07:07.360 --> 00:07:13.360 This is the greater gift that we could ever have, whether we are married or single. 00:07:14.720 --> 00:07:17.840 And this is what our true and primary identity is. 00:07:17.839 --> 00:07:25.199 The most important thing, regardless of status, is that we are followers of the Lord Jesus Christ, and that we belong to him. 00:07:25.199 --> 00:07:31.920 Now, if you are single, you may be struggling with what verse 7 says. 00:07:32.800 --> 00:07:36.719 You might be saying, well, I don't very much like that gift. 00:07:36.720 --> 00:07:47.600 I prefer the gift of marriage. In fact, I feel I ought to be married. I like to be married. I don't like this gift that God has given me. 00:07:49.280 --> 00:07:55.680 Well, as we will see shortly, our status can, and it does, from time to time, change. 00:07:55.680 --> 00:08:04.480 But perhaps the reason why people struggle with singleness is because they don't know if you understand the purpose. 00:08:05.199 --> 00:08:09.360 Marriage has a purpose that we looked at last week, and so the singleness. 00:08:10.079 --> 00:08:18.319 We tend to put far too much emphasis on our status, when the real focus is about service. 00:08:19.439 --> 00:08:21.680 Not status, but service. 00:08:21.680 --> 00:08:27.360 So the first thing that we're going to look at is a life of service. 00:08:28.160 --> 00:08:35.440 Marriage is a picture on the one hand of Christ's love and devotion to the church. 00:08:36.480 --> 00:08:42.799 Singleness, on the other hand, is a picture of the church's love and devotion to Christ. 00:08:43.680 --> 00:08:50.560 Marriage should not be seen as superior to singleness, and singleness should never be viewed as inferior to marriage. 00:08:50.559 --> 00:08:51.119 Marriage should not be seen as inferior to the church. 00:08:51.119 --> 00:08:53.359 Together, they are complementary. 00:08:53.359 --> 00:09:00.079 On the one hand, or together, they reflect the whole relationship of God with his people. 00:09:00.559 --> 00:09:07.919 So if people look at the married unit, if they look at the married life, they should see a picture of God's loving service, 00:09:08.239 --> 00:09:13.599 as the way the husband sacrificially serves and cares for his wife. 00:09:13.600 --> 00:09:22.800 And if people look at the single life, they should see a picture of our loving service and dedication to God. 00:09:23.600 --> 00:09:28.240 As people give themselves wholeheartedly to serve and love God. 00:09:29.279 --> 00:09:31.840 So singleness is actually full of purpose. 00:09:32.000 --> 00:09:33.680 It's all about service. 00:09:33.679 --> 00:09:36.959 Well, where do you get that from, say? 00:09:36.959 --> 00:09:40.319 Well, let's have a look at the passage here, and we'll see how it's worked out. 00:09:40.319 --> 00:09:43.199 First of all, stay as you are. 00:09:43.759 --> 00:09:44.959 Verse 17. 00:09:46.000 --> 00:09:52.239 Nevertheless, he's just been talking about marriage and the various situations people may find in their marriage. 00:09:52.579 --> 00:09:59.099 He says, nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigns them, 00:09:59.620 --> 00:10:01.799 unto which God has called them. 00:10:01.799 --> 00:10:06.599 Now, because of all the sexual immorality that there was in common, 00:10:07.240 --> 00:10:09.959 and that was seeping into the church, 00:10:10.979 --> 00:10:12.559 in attempt to be different, 00:10:13.039 --> 00:10:16.319 the Christians were coming around and saying, 00:10:16.399 --> 00:10:17.839 look, we have to change our status. 00:10:17.919 --> 00:10:19.819 We have to be so different to everybody else. 00:10:19.819 --> 00:10:22.439 So married people were acting as if they were single, 00:10:23.159 --> 00:10:26.579 and single people were kind of hiding away completely from everybody else, 00:10:27.579 --> 00:10:29.620 and they were all changing their status. 00:10:29.620 --> 00:10:31.620 But what he's saying here is, 00:10:31.620 --> 00:10:34.419 whatever situation you were in, 00:10:34.419 --> 00:10:36.419 when you became a Christian, 00:10:36.419 --> 00:10:39.379 stay as you are. 00:10:39.379 --> 00:10:42.340 For example, verse 18. 00:10:43.059 --> 00:10:44.039 He asks the question, 00:10:44.179 --> 00:10:47.279 was a man already circumcised when he was called, 00:10:47.439 --> 00:10:48.559 when he became a Christian? 00:10:49.559 --> 00:10:52.240 Well, he should not become uncircumcised. 00:10:53.120 --> 00:10:56.159 Was a man uncircumcised when he became a Christian? 00:10:57.299 --> 00:10:59.220 Well, he should not be circumcised. 00:10:59.220 --> 00:11:05.139 Now, just as you don't change your cultural identity when you become a Christian, 00:11:05.700 --> 00:11:09.620 so you don't seek to change your status when you become a Christian. 00:11:10.420 --> 00:11:13.220 There was no sign that you came in the door that said, 00:11:13.600 --> 00:11:14.860 when you become a Christian, 00:11:15.220 --> 00:11:17.019 you must become a Protestant, 00:11:17.019 --> 00:11:18.540 or you must become a Baptist. 00:11:20.600 --> 00:11:23.259 In the same way, there isn't a sign up there that says, 00:11:23.360 --> 00:11:24.420 when you become a Christian, 00:11:24.560 --> 00:11:25.700 you must get married. 00:11:25.700 --> 00:11:28.480 First, verse 19. 00:11:29.680 --> 00:11:30.780 Circumcision is nothing, 00:11:30.780 --> 00:11:32.540 and uncircumcision is nothing. 00:11:33.300 --> 00:11:36.060 Keeping God's command is what counts. 00:11:36.780 --> 00:11:38.780 So, marriage by itself 00:11:39.900 --> 00:11:41.900 is not going to make any difference to your life 00:11:41.900 --> 00:11:44.620 in terms of purity or your relationship with God. 00:11:45.100 --> 00:11:49.900 And singleness by itself is not going to make you any better or more pure by itself. 00:11:50.700 --> 00:11:53.700 Obeying God is what ultimately counts. 00:11:55.700 --> 00:11:56.520 So, verse 20. 00:11:56.680 --> 00:11:58.340 Each one, each person, 00:11:58.820 --> 00:12:00.940 should remain in the situation 00:12:00.940 --> 00:12:02.520 which he would be 00:12:02.520 --> 00:12:04.740 when God called him. 00:12:05.200 --> 00:12:06.800 When he became a Christian. 00:12:09.200 --> 00:12:11.520 Now, there's a big question there, isn't there? 00:12:11.879 --> 00:12:13.020 You're probably looking at me and saying, 00:12:13.080 --> 00:12:14.379 Charlie, when did you become a Christian? 00:12:14.520 --> 00:12:14.720 Well, 00:12:15.300 --> 00:12:17.160 I was single when I became a Christian. 00:12:18.180 --> 00:12:19.240 But I'm married now. 00:12:19.740 --> 00:12:20.980 Am I being disobedient? 00:12:20.980 --> 00:12:24.120 Well, we'll come back to that in a minute. 00:12:25.820 --> 00:12:30.200 You see, being a Christian does not mean a change in status, 00:12:31.200 --> 00:12:33.220 but a change in service. 00:12:33.379 --> 00:12:36.300 We have been now set free to serve God. 00:12:37.320 --> 00:12:38.639 Look at verse 21. 00:12:38.639 --> 00:12:47.039 Were you a slave when you became a Christian or when you were taught? 00:12:47.639 --> 00:12:49.039 Well, don't let it trouble you. 00:12:49.240 --> 00:12:51.720 Although, if you can, gain your freedom. 00:12:51.860 --> 00:12:54.679 Or, if you can, gain your freedom to do so. 00:12:55.399 --> 00:12:58.279 Now, slavery was a real issue in the first century 00:12:58.279 --> 00:13:00.759 and it still is in many parts of the world today. 00:13:00.759 --> 00:13:05.580 And many who had become Christians were actually slaves. 00:13:06.580 --> 00:13:07.659 So, in this instance, 00:13:07.840 --> 00:13:11.220 he is not encouraging slaves to stay as they are. 00:13:11.819 --> 00:13:14.019 But, as it says at the end of verse 21, 00:13:14.799 --> 00:13:16.439 don't let it trouble you. 00:13:17.159 --> 00:13:17.759 In other words, 00:13:17.819 --> 00:13:18.919 if you're in a situation 00:13:18.919 --> 00:13:20.720 and you can put up with being a slave, 00:13:20.819 --> 00:13:21.799 you've got a good master 00:13:21.799 --> 00:13:23.539 who actually does take care of you 00:13:23.539 --> 00:13:25.720 and does provide you with a place to live 00:13:25.720 --> 00:13:27.379 and does give you food for your work. 00:13:27.799 --> 00:13:29.259 If you can put up with it, 00:13:29.559 --> 00:13:30.319 put up with it. 00:13:31.240 --> 00:13:34.200 Although, if you can gain your freedom, 00:13:34.980 --> 00:13:35.460 do so. 00:13:37.480 --> 00:13:40.580 So, why is he introducing this whole issue of slavery? 00:13:41.159 --> 00:13:44.120 Well, he's introducing it to illustrate 00:13:44.120 --> 00:13:47.340 a freedom that we all have. 00:13:47.919 --> 00:13:49.019 Look at verse 22. 00:13:50.860 --> 00:13:52.779 For he who was a slave 00:13:52.779 --> 00:13:55.840 when he was called by the Lord, 00:13:55.919 --> 00:13:57.340 that phrase called by the Lord 00:13:57.340 --> 00:13:58.819 is simply when he became a Christian, 00:13:58.820 --> 00:14:01.720 is the Lord's freedom. 00:14:02.680 --> 00:14:03.900 Now, physically, obviously, 00:14:04.060 --> 00:14:05.040 he is not free. 00:14:05.120 --> 00:14:07.879 He's still tied to his earthly master 00:14:07.879 --> 00:14:09.400 under his control. 00:14:09.480 --> 00:14:10.800 He has to do what he says. 00:14:11.940 --> 00:14:13.240 But, through Christ, 00:14:13.379 --> 00:14:13.840 the slave, 00:14:13.960 --> 00:14:15.100 when he becomes a Christian, 00:14:15.540 --> 00:14:17.460 has been set free spiritually. 00:14:18.260 --> 00:14:20.080 He's been released from the power 00:14:20.080 --> 00:14:21.960 and the consequences of sin. 00:14:21.960 --> 00:14:24.240 He's been set free from a more 00:14:24.240 --> 00:14:26.100 risk of the devil. 00:14:27.700 --> 00:14:29.860 He is now a freed man. 00:14:32.860 --> 00:14:34.200 Verse 22. 00:14:34.840 --> 00:14:35.940 Well, the rest of verse 22, 00:14:36.100 --> 00:14:36.620 similarly, 00:14:37.520 --> 00:14:39.300 he who was a free man, 00:14:39.560 --> 00:14:40.700 who wasn't a slave, 00:14:41.180 --> 00:14:42.700 when he became a Christian, 00:14:42.700 --> 00:14:45.480 is now Christ's slave. 00:14:47.120 --> 00:14:48.060 So, physically, 00:14:48.259 --> 00:14:50.280 this person who wasn't a slave, 00:14:50.560 --> 00:14:50.920 obviously, 00:14:51.060 --> 00:14:51.820 when he becomes a Christian, 00:14:52.020 --> 00:14:54.120 doesn't have changed by Langdon 00:14:54.120 --> 00:14:55.720 and he's not kicked out for work. 00:14:55.820 --> 00:14:57.400 No, he maintains his freedom. 00:14:58.360 --> 00:14:59.640 But, through Christ, 00:14:59.740 --> 00:15:00.940 when he becomes a Christian, 00:15:01.240 --> 00:15:03.280 he now becomes a slave to Christ. 00:15:03.400 --> 00:15:04.240 In one sense, 00:15:04.340 --> 00:15:05.780 he has lost his freedom. 00:15:05.779 --> 00:15:07.659 And now, 00:15:07.759 --> 00:15:09.220 he has become a slave 00:15:09.220 --> 00:15:10.799 to serve Christ. 00:15:11.559 --> 00:15:13.199 Not to a ruthless dictator, 00:15:13.399 --> 00:15:15.459 but to a loving and caring king. 00:15:17.039 --> 00:15:18.399 And that's simply what it is 00:15:18.399 --> 00:15:19.519 for each one of us, 00:15:19.620 --> 00:15:20.839 if we are Christians. 00:15:21.919 --> 00:15:23.500 We have been set free 00:15:23.500 --> 00:15:25.179 from serving ourselves, 00:15:25.699 --> 00:15:26.659 so that now, 00:15:26.779 --> 00:15:29.059 we become slaves of Christ. 00:15:30.379 --> 00:15:32.120 And in the context here, 00:15:32.220 --> 00:15:32.899 he is saying, 00:15:33.319 --> 00:15:34.360 if you are single, 00:15:34.360 --> 00:15:36.480 if you are unmarried, 00:15:37.440 --> 00:15:39.159 you have been set free 00:15:39.159 --> 00:15:40.000 from sin, 00:15:40.840 --> 00:15:42.960 so that you can now become 00:15:42.960 --> 00:15:45.740 a servant of Christ. 00:15:46.779 --> 00:15:48.680 It's not about your status, 00:15:49.440 --> 00:15:51.560 it's all about service. 00:15:51.860 --> 00:15:52.539 Verse 23, 00:15:53.759 --> 00:15:55.580 you were bought at a price. 00:15:56.940 --> 00:15:59.159 Do not become slaves of men. 00:15:59.539 --> 00:16:00.899 Christ died for you. 00:16:01.100 --> 00:16:02.320 He owns you. 00:16:02.700 --> 00:16:04.120 He is your true master. 00:16:04.360 --> 00:16:05.779 You belong to him. 00:16:06.860 --> 00:16:07.860 Just as we read 00:16:07.860 --> 00:16:09.159 at the beginning in Ezekiel, 00:16:09.480 --> 00:16:10.340 we have this one 00:16:10.340 --> 00:16:11.639 who pursued us, 00:16:11.980 --> 00:16:13.080 this lover who came 00:16:13.080 --> 00:16:14.000 to find us. 00:16:14.240 --> 00:16:15.139 And when he finds us, 00:16:15.180 --> 00:16:15.480 he says, 00:16:15.700 --> 00:16:17.340 you now belong to me. 00:16:19.320 --> 00:16:20.379 And he's simply saying, 00:16:20.539 --> 00:16:20.740 here, 00:16:21.399 --> 00:16:22.659 you were bought at a price. 00:16:23.039 --> 00:16:25.019 Do not become slaves of men. 00:16:25.419 --> 00:16:27.080 Don't use your singleness, 00:16:27.080 --> 00:16:32.360 don't use your freedom to indulge in sexual immorality 00:16:32.360 --> 00:16:33.860 and behave however you want. 00:16:34.620 --> 00:16:36.500 Don't be using your singleness 00:16:36.500 --> 00:16:38.259 to be constantly looking around 00:16:38.259 --> 00:16:39.860 for that perfect relationship. 00:16:41.440 --> 00:16:42.040 Instead, 00:16:42.200 --> 00:16:43.259 use your singleness 00:16:43.259 --> 00:16:45.460 to serve God, 00:16:46.200 --> 00:16:48.080 to give your life to him. 00:16:48.080 --> 00:16:49.200 verse 24, 00:16:49.860 --> 00:16:51.160 brothers and sisters, 00:16:52.700 --> 00:16:53.720 each person 00:16:53.720 --> 00:16:55.759 as responsible to God 00:16:55.759 --> 00:16:57.520 should remain 00:16:57.520 --> 00:16:58.820 in the situation 00:16:58.820 --> 00:17:00.639 God called us. 00:17:02.420 --> 00:17:03.500 We are 00:17:03.500 --> 00:17:04.660 to be slaves 00:17:04.660 --> 00:17:06.140 to Christ. 00:17:07.579 --> 00:17:08.079 Look down 00:17:08.079 --> 00:17:09.220 at verse 32. 00:17:09.220 --> 00:17:13.940 I would like you 00:17:13.940 --> 00:17:15.160 to be free 00:17:15.160 --> 00:17:16.180 from concern. 00:17:17.980 --> 00:17:18.900 He says that 00:17:18.900 --> 00:17:19.779 because if you look 00:17:19.779 --> 00:17:21.700 at the end of verse 28, 00:17:21.920 --> 00:17:22.240 it says, 00:17:22.380 --> 00:17:23.339 those who marry 00:17:23.339 --> 00:17:25.140 will face many troubles 00:17:25.140 --> 00:17:25.880 in this life 00:17:25.880 --> 00:17:27.360 and I want to spare you this. 00:17:28.299 --> 00:17:29.140 And he continues 00:17:29.140 --> 00:17:29.940 verse 32, 00:17:30.240 --> 00:17:30.980 I would like you 00:17:30.980 --> 00:17:31.660 to be free 00:17:31.660 --> 00:17:32.480 from concern. 00:17:35.019 --> 00:17:36.500 An unmarried man 00:17:36.500 --> 00:17:37.100 is concerned 00:17:37.100 --> 00:17:38.180 about the Lord's affairs. 00:17:38.180 --> 00:17:39.279 how he can please 00:17:39.279 --> 00:17:39.920 the Lord's affairs. 00:17:40.740 --> 00:17:41.740 But a married man 00:17:41.740 --> 00:17:42.299 is concerned 00:17:42.299 --> 00:17:43.160 about the affairs 00:17:43.160 --> 00:17:43.980 of this woman, 00:17:45.019 --> 00:17:46.400 looking after his wife, 00:17:47.420 --> 00:17:48.620 after her needs 00:17:48.620 --> 00:17:50.299 and his interests 00:17:50.299 --> 00:17:51.640 are divided. 00:17:53.400 --> 00:17:54.440 And he balances up 00:17:54.440 --> 00:17:55.299 as he talks about 00:17:55.299 --> 00:17:56.000 the women. 00:17:57.000 --> 00:17:58.320 An unmarried woman 00:17:58.320 --> 00:17:59.019 or virgin 00:17:59.019 --> 00:17:59.920 is concerned 00:17:59.920 --> 00:18:01.299 about the Lord's affairs. 00:18:01.860 --> 00:18:02.560 Her aim 00:18:02.560 --> 00:18:03.660 is to be devoted 00:18:03.660 --> 00:18:04.279 to the Lord 00:18:04.279 --> 00:18:05.100 in both body 00:18:05.100 --> 00:18:05.779 and spirit. 00:18:06.759 --> 00:18:07.920 But a married woman 00:18:07.920 --> 00:18:08.580 is concerned 00:18:08.580 --> 00:18:09.460 about the affairs 00:18:09.460 --> 00:18:10.259 of this world. 00:18:10.580 --> 00:18:11.480 How she can plead 00:18:11.480 --> 00:18:12.060 her husband. 00:18:14.019 --> 00:18:14.580 Now, it's all 00:18:14.580 --> 00:18:15.640 very crystal clear, 00:18:15.720 --> 00:18:16.140 isn't it? 00:18:16.960 --> 00:18:17.759 It's saying 00:18:17.759 --> 00:18:19.200 a single person 00:18:19.200 --> 00:18:21.259 will do far more 00:18:21.259 --> 00:18:22.039 for the Lord 00:18:22.039 --> 00:18:23.759 than a married person. 00:18:24.480 --> 00:18:25.279 It's not saying 00:18:25.279 --> 00:18:26.320 that the single person 00:18:26.320 --> 00:18:26.900 is better 00:18:26.900 --> 00:18:28.039 as in superior, 00:18:28.039 --> 00:18:30.599 but practically speaking, 00:18:30.799 --> 00:18:31.559 single people 00:18:31.559 --> 00:18:32.180 will be able 00:18:32.180 --> 00:18:33.119 to serve God 00:18:33.119 --> 00:18:34.059 far more 00:18:34.059 --> 00:18:35.480 than married people. 00:18:37.799 --> 00:18:38.839 I think it says 00:18:38.839 --> 00:18:39.480 a bit more. 00:18:39.579 --> 00:18:40.359 You can see it 00:18:40.359 --> 00:18:41.420 in those who are married. 00:18:42.460 --> 00:18:43.519 Perhaps even those 00:18:43.519 --> 00:18:44.039 who are married 00:18:44.039 --> 00:18:44.819 through this morning. 00:18:45.079 --> 00:18:46.519 They're always tired, 00:18:46.639 --> 00:18:47.059 aren't they? 00:18:48.159 --> 00:18:49.740 Why are they always tired? 00:18:50.299 --> 00:18:51.960 They never have much time. 00:18:53.079 --> 00:18:54.180 Dad is rushing back 00:18:54.180 --> 00:18:54.680 from work 00:18:54.680 --> 00:18:55.320 to look after 00:18:55.320 --> 00:18:55.779 the wife 00:18:55.779 --> 00:18:56.519 who hasn't been 00:18:56.519 --> 00:18:57.560 well through the day. 00:18:58.820 --> 00:18:59.519 Mum is having 00:18:59.519 --> 00:19:00.500 to rush out early 00:19:00.500 --> 00:19:01.240 to bring the kids 00:19:01.240 --> 00:19:01.680 to the flesh 00:19:01.680 --> 00:19:02.120 on the way 00:19:02.120 --> 00:19:02.900 to somewhere else. 00:19:03.980 --> 00:19:05.120 Mum can't go out 00:19:05.120 --> 00:19:05.820 tonight because 00:19:05.820 --> 00:19:06.600 the kids are being 00:19:06.600 --> 00:19:07.259 put to bed. 00:19:08.240 --> 00:19:08.880 Now, none of these 00:19:08.880 --> 00:19:09.840 things are wrong. 00:19:10.279 --> 00:19:11.560 They're all necessary 00:19:11.560 --> 00:19:12.700 and they're valuable, 00:19:13.519 --> 00:19:14.880 but the reality is 00:19:14.880 --> 00:19:16.539 that's what they're 00:19:16.539 --> 00:19:17.620 all tied up with, 00:19:17.700 --> 00:19:18.759 these very practical 00:19:18.759 --> 00:19:19.160 things, 00:19:19.220 --> 00:19:19.900 and they don't have 00:19:19.900 --> 00:19:20.400 time, 00:19:20.519 --> 00:19:21.320 and they're tired. 00:19:21.319 --> 00:19:23.899 The single person, 00:19:24.019 --> 00:19:24.720 on the other hand, 00:19:24.799 --> 00:19:25.740 while they have work 00:19:25.740 --> 00:19:26.539 and everything else 00:19:26.539 --> 00:19:27.460 like married people, 00:19:27.819 --> 00:19:28.839 they actually do have 00:19:28.839 --> 00:19:29.619 lots of time 00:19:29.619 --> 00:19:30.279 on their hands. 00:19:31.240 --> 00:19:32.019 They have no first 00:19:32.019 --> 00:19:33.079 things to organise, 00:19:34.179 --> 00:19:35.700 no nappies to be changing 00:19:35.700 --> 00:19:36.579 if there's children 00:19:36.579 --> 00:19:37.519 in the married life. 00:19:38.220 --> 00:19:39.259 You have no spouse 00:19:39.259 --> 00:19:39.939 to look after. 00:19:40.220 --> 00:19:41.339 There's no school runs 00:19:41.339 --> 00:19:41.919 to be done, 00:19:42.220 --> 00:19:43.579 no big meals to prepare, 00:19:43.939 --> 00:19:45.319 no big shots to be done. 00:19:46.220 --> 00:19:47.639 There's no big decision-making 00:19:47.639 --> 00:19:48.559 process to have 00:19:48.559 --> 00:19:49.220 with your spouse 00:19:49.220 --> 00:19:50.139 that usually ends up 00:19:50.139 --> 00:19:51.299 in a big mad argument. 00:19:51.319 --> 00:19:53.339 You can go 00:19:53.339 --> 00:19:54.200 whenever you like 00:19:54.200 --> 00:19:55.059 and you can come home 00:19:55.059 --> 00:19:55.879 whenever you like. 00:19:56.059 --> 00:19:56.740 You can go off 00:19:56.740 --> 00:19:57.500 for a whole week 00:19:57.500 --> 00:19:58.279 and nobody's going 00:19:58.279 --> 00:19:59.059 to say anything. 00:20:01.179 --> 00:20:02.240 Single people 00:20:02.240 --> 00:20:04.339 are free 00:20:04.339 --> 00:20:05.559 to serve. 00:20:07.159 --> 00:20:08.539 Now my challenge 00:20:08.539 --> 00:20:09.480 to single people 00:20:09.480 --> 00:20:10.079 is this. 00:20:11.859 --> 00:20:12.819 We spoke a lot 00:20:12.819 --> 00:20:13.639 of challenges 00:20:13.639 --> 00:20:14.759 to the married people 00:20:14.759 --> 00:20:15.419 last week. 00:20:16.379 --> 00:20:17.079 Single people, 00:20:17.200 --> 00:20:17.720 wake up, 00:20:18.019 --> 00:20:19.099 whatever age you are. 00:20:19.799 --> 00:20:19.919 Hmm? 00:20:19.920 --> 00:20:21.940 Are you using 00:20:21.940 --> 00:20:23.160 your singleness well? 00:20:24.740 --> 00:20:26.460 Am I preoccupied 00:20:26.460 --> 00:20:27.600 with wanting sex 00:20:27.600 --> 00:20:29.420 or am I willing 00:20:29.420 --> 00:20:30.960 to be a slave 00:20:30.960 --> 00:20:32.180 to Christ? 00:20:33.680 --> 00:20:34.720 Ask yourself, 00:20:35.480 --> 00:20:36.420 what do you spend 00:20:36.420 --> 00:20:37.539 your time thinking about? 00:20:37.920 --> 00:20:39.420 Pursuing that relationship? 00:20:40.060 --> 00:20:41.259 Running after that boy? 00:20:41.400 --> 00:20:42.440 Running after that girl? 00:20:42.440 --> 00:20:44.539 Or am I pursuing 00:20:44.539 --> 00:20:46.080 the kingdom of God? 00:20:47.360 --> 00:20:48.779 Am I more interested 00:20:48.779 --> 00:20:49.860 in spending time 00:20:49.860 --> 00:20:50.720 with my girlfriend, 00:20:50.940 --> 00:20:51.320 boyfriend, 00:20:52.059 --> 00:20:53.000 than actually serving 00:20:53.000 --> 00:20:53.680 the church? 00:20:54.200 --> 00:20:54.480 Sorry, 00:20:54.580 --> 00:20:55.220 I can't do anything. 00:20:55.299 --> 00:20:55.820 I've got to go 00:20:55.820 --> 00:20:56.820 to the cinema tonight. 00:20:59.620 --> 00:21:00.640 Verse 35. 00:21:00.640 --> 00:21:03.920 I am saying this 00:21:03.920 --> 00:21:05.140 for your own good, 00:21:05.740 --> 00:21:07.460 not to restrict you, 00:21:08.520 --> 00:21:09.700 but that you may live 00:21:09.700 --> 00:21:10.780 in a right way 00:21:10.780 --> 00:21:13.520 in undivided devotion 00:21:13.520 --> 00:21:15.320 to the Lord. 00:21:17.080 --> 00:21:18.320 In my preparation, 00:21:18.580 --> 00:21:19.840 I came across this quote. 00:21:21.620 --> 00:21:23.759 Singleness glorifies God 00:21:23.759 --> 00:21:25.500 by communicating the message 00:21:25.500 --> 00:21:27.000 that love and devotion 00:21:27.000 --> 00:21:29.240 to Christ is primal. 00:21:29.940 --> 00:21:31.779 It says to a watching world, 00:21:32.619 --> 00:21:33.460 God is enough. 00:21:34.460 --> 00:21:35.420 God is sufficient. 00:21:36.380 --> 00:21:38.380 God is better than anyone else 00:21:38.380 --> 00:21:39.680 or any singer. 00:21:40.880 --> 00:21:42.759 God is worth all the pain 00:21:42.759 --> 00:21:44.700 of serving Jesus. 00:21:47.380 --> 00:21:49.559 So, he's very practical. 00:21:50.160 --> 00:21:51.200 He's very clear. 00:21:52.160 --> 00:21:53.099 And he's saying 00:21:53.099 --> 00:21:54.480 that the single life, 00:21:54.599 --> 00:21:56.140 yes, it's a gift from God, 00:21:56.140 --> 00:21:58.180 and his primary purpose 00:21:58.180 --> 00:21:59.900 is to be a life 00:21:59.900 --> 00:22:00.660 dedicated, 00:22:00.900 --> 00:22:01.980 undivided devotion 00:22:01.980 --> 00:22:03.680 to serving God 00:22:03.680 --> 00:22:05.200 and not chasing 00:22:05.200 --> 00:22:07.020 things of this world. 00:22:09.540 --> 00:22:10.820 But he goes on also 00:22:10.820 --> 00:22:11.600 to talk about 00:22:11.600 --> 00:22:13.640 a life of sexual purity. 00:22:15.420 --> 00:22:16.480 And we go back 00:22:16.480 --> 00:22:17.100 to the question 00:22:17.100 --> 00:22:18.180 that we raised earlier. 00:22:18.340 --> 00:22:18.640 You say, 00:22:18.720 --> 00:22:18.960 Johnny, 00:22:20.060 --> 00:22:21.480 I was a single 00:22:21.480 --> 00:22:22.800 when I became a Christian. 00:22:23.700 --> 00:22:24.700 Does that mean 00:22:24.700 --> 00:22:26.080 that I have to stay 00:22:26.080 --> 00:22:26.840 as I am? 00:22:26.920 --> 00:22:27.900 That I should remain 00:22:27.900 --> 00:22:28.759 in the situation 00:22:28.759 --> 00:22:29.920 that God told me to? 00:22:30.580 --> 00:22:31.940 Can I never get married? 00:22:33.559 --> 00:22:34.940 What if I don't feel 00:22:34.940 --> 00:22:36.160 gifted to be changed? 00:22:37.700 --> 00:22:38.140 Well, 00:22:38.259 --> 00:22:39.640 whatever your gift is, 00:22:40.799 --> 00:22:42.080 this passage is very clear 00:22:42.080 --> 00:22:43.279 to say that our gift 00:22:43.279 --> 00:22:44.720 may change. 00:22:45.620 --> 00:22:46.740 But the emphasis, 00:22:46.960 --> 00:22:48.160 if our gift is changing, 00:22:48.640 --> 00:22:49.759 the emphasis must be 00:22:49.759 --> 00:22:50.940 on sexual purity. 00:22:50.940 --> 00:22:51.960 Look at verse 8, 00:22:52.200 --> 00:22:52.940 chapter 7. 00:22:52.940 --> 00:22:55.120 Now, 00:22:55.240 --> 00:22:56.220 to the unmarried 00:22:56.220 --> 00:22:57.680 and to the widows, 00:22:57.920 --> 00:22:58.720 I say this. 00:22:59.519 --> 00:23:00.539 It is good for them 00:23:00.539 --> 00:23:01.940 to stay unmarried 00:23:01.940 --> 00:23:02.600 as I am, 00:23:03.059 --> 00:23:03.900 for the very reasons 00:23:03.900 --> 00:23:05.220 that we've just looked at. 00:23:05.320 --> 00:23:06.440 They are free from concern 00:23:06.440 --> 00:23:07.740 and able to give their life 00:23:07.740 --> 00:23:08.860 completely to the Lord. 00:23:10.640 --> 00:23:11.080 But, 00:23:11.620 --> 00:23:12.340 he's practical, 00:23:12.559 --> 00:23:13.059 he's real. 00:23:14.220 --> 00:23:14.660 But, 00:23:14.799 --> 00:23:16.600 if they cannot control themselves, 00:23:17.120 --> 00:23:18.019 they should marry. 00:23:18.019 --> 00:23:19.599 for it is pressure 00:23:19.599 --> 00:23:20.240 to marry, 00:23:20.359 --> 00:23:21.039 then to burn, 00:23:21.299 --> 00:23:22.059 which is passion. 00:23:23.500 --> 00:23:23.720 Now, 00:23:23.779 --> 00:23:24.400 the pressures 00:23:24.400 --> 00:23:26.500 for single people 00:23:26.500 --> 00:23:28.920 are absolutely huge. 00:23:29.079 --> 00:23:30.200 It is big at this time 00:23:30.200 --> 00:23:32.079 and it is big today. 00:23:32.079 --> 00:23:34.859 I think there are two major pressures 00:23:34.859 --> 00:23:36.240 that single people 00:23:36.240 --> 00:23:36.980 have to live with. 00:23:37.240 --> 00:23:38.759 There is the passion pressure, 00:23:39.139 --> 00:23:40.139 as I call it here 00:23:40.139 --> 00:23:40.960 in verse 9, 00:23:42.480 --> 00:23:44.519 which comes from the inside. 00:23:45.359 --> 00:23:46.480 If our normal 00:23:46.480 --> 00:23:47.199 and natural 00:23:47.199 --> 00:23:48.559 biological development 00:23:48.559 --> 00:23:49.339 that when boys 00:23:49.339 --> 00:23:49.879 see girl 00:23:49.879 --> 00:23:50.960 and girls see boy, 00:23:51.079 --> 00:23:52.119 there's something 00:23:52.119 --> 00:23:53.220 going on inside. 00:23:54.199 --> 00:23:55.439 There's the passion pressure. 00:23:55.779 --> 00:23:57.099 Then there's the peer pressure, 00:23:57.659 --> 00:23:59.259 which comes from the outside, 00:23:59.259 --> 00:23:59.839 which says, 00:24:00.180 --> 00:24:01.539 if you want to be normal, 00:24:01.720 --> 00:24:02.900 if you're going to fit in 00:24:02.900 --> 00:24:04.000 with the rest of the society, 00:24:04.319 --> 00:24:04.980 you have to be 00:24:04.980 --> 00:24:06.119 in a sexual relationship. 00:24:07.240 --> 00:24:08.319 And these are the pressures 00:24:08.319 --> 00:24:09.319 that are crowding in 00:24:09.319 --> 00:24:10.119 on young people, 00:24:10.700 --> 00:24:11.680 on single people. 00:24:13.819 --> 00:24:14.559 And Christians, 00:24:14.680 --> 00:24:15.819 within that context, 00:24:15.940 --> 00:24:16.720 it's important, 00:24:16.859 --> 00:24:17.160 he's saying, 00:24:17.220 --> 00:24:18.879 that you conduct yourself rightly, 00:24:19.220 --> 00:24:20.720 that you live with impurity. 00:24:22.059 --> 00:24:23.359 And it seems to me 00:24:23.359 --> 00:24:24.460 that there are simply 00:24:24.460 --> 00:24:25.720 two options 00:24:25.720 --> 00:24:28.079 for those who are single. 00:24:29.259 --> 00:24:30.240 The first 00:24:30.240 --> 00:24:33.180 is get married. 00:24:33.640 --> 00:24:34.859 Look at verse 36. 00:24:38.460 --> 00:24:39.940 If anyone thinks 00:24:39.940 --> 00:24:41.299 they are acting 00:24:41.299 --> 00:24:42.259 improperly 00:24:42.259 --> 00:24:43.299 towards the virgin, 00:24:43.660 --> 00:24:44.879 he is engaged to. 00:24:46.660 --> 00:24:47.519 And if she is 00:24:47.519 --> 00:24:48.720 getting on in years, 00:24:49.000 --> 00:24:50.099 meaning beyond the years 00:24:50.099 --> 00:24:51.000 of childbirth, 00:24:51.740 --> 00:24:52.980 if she's getting on in years 00:24:52.980 --> 00:24:53.599 and feels 00:24:53.599 --> 00:24:54.779 he ought to marry, 00:24:55.339 --> 00:24:56.299 he should do 00:24:56.299 --> 00:24:57.079 as he wants. 00:24:57.079 --> 00:24:59.299 He's not sinning. 00:24:59.559 --> 00:25:01.199 They should get married. 00:25:03.639 --> 00:25:04.879 Now I think you know 00:25:04.879 --> 00:25:06.439 by now that 00:25:06.439 --> 00:25:08.619 I'm not in favour 00:25:08.619 --> 00:25:10.059 of long-term relationships. 00:25:10.059 --> 00:25:10.879 she can come back 00:25:10.879 --> 00:25:11.599 to me on all of this 00:25:11.599 --> 00:25:12.139 afterwards. 00:25:12.779 --> 00:25:13.720 But I don't think 00:25:13.720 --> 00:25:14.419 it's a good thing 00:25:14.419 --> 00:25:16.099 and here's the reason why. 00:25:17.799 --> 00:25:18.399 Verse 36 00:25:18.399 --> 00:25:19.500 is a good reason. 00:25:20.759 --> 00:25:21.319 In fact, 00:25:21.379 --> 00:25:22.220 I don't think 00:25:22.220 --> 00:25:22.859 that you should be 00:25:22.859 --> 00:25:24.279 starting any relationship 00:25:24.279 --> 00:25:25.759 with anybody 00:25:25.759 --> 00:25:27.299 unless 00:25:27.299 --> 00:25:29.659 you think 00:25:29.659 --> 00:25:30.299 you're going to be 00:25:30.299 --> 00:25:31.460 marrying that person. 00:25:31.460 --> 00:25:33.440 I think we have 00:25:33.440 --> 00:25:34.620 all around the wrong way. 00:25:34.720 --> 00:25:35.180 People just 00:25:35.180 --> 00:25:36.360 join their relationships 00:25:36.360 --> 00:25:37.360 like a union. 00:25:38.340 --> 00:25:39.319 It's just not 00:25:39.319 --> 00:25:40.039 healthy. 00:25:40.220 --> 00:25:41.240 It's not good for them. 00:25:43.319 --> 00:25:44.140 Let me divert 00:25:44.140 --> 00:25:45.059 a minute. 00:25:45.220 --> 00:25:46.660 Keep your finger there 00:25:46.660 --> 00:25:47.880 in 1 Corinthians 7 00:25:47.880 --> 00:25:48.460 and go to 00:25:48.460 --> 00:25:49.240 1 Timothy 00:25:49.240 --> 00:25:50.299 chapter 5. 00:25:50.299 --> 00:25:50.380 1 Timothy 00:25:50.380 --> 00:25:51.299 chapter 5. 00:25:51.299 --> 00:25:52.299 1 Timothy 00:25:52.299 --> 00:25:54.299 chapter 5. 00:25:54.299 --> 00:25:55.299 1 Timothy 00:25:55.299 --> 00:25:56.299 chapter 5. 00:25:56.299 --> 00:25:57.299 1 Timothy 00:25:57.299 --> 00:25:58.299 chapter 5. 00:25:58.299 --> 00:25:59.299 1 Timothy 00:25:59.299 --> 00:26:00.299 chapter 5. 00:26:00.299 --> 00:26:01.299 1 Timothy 00:26:01.299 --> 00:26:03.779 1 Timothy 00:26:03.779 --> 00:26:08.779 chapter 5. 00:26:12.859 --> 00:26:13.779 1 Timothy 00:26:13.779 --> 00:26:14.779 chapter 5. 00:26:14.779 --> 00:26:15.779 1 Timothy 00:26:15.779 --> 00:26:16.779 chapter 5. 00:26:16.779 --> 00:26:17.779 1 Timothy 00:26:17.779 --> 00:26:19.779 chapter 5. 00:26:19.779 --> 00:26:21.779 1 Timothy 00:26:21.779 --> 00:26:23.779 chapter 5. 00:26:23.779 --> 00:26:24.779 1 Timothy 00:26:24.779 --> 00:26:25.779 chapter 5. 00:26:25.779 --> 00:26:26.819 So this is 00:26:26.819 --> 00:26:27.779 older Paul 00:26:27.779 --> 00:26:29.139 talking to 00:26:29.139 --> 00:26:30.139 young man 00:26:30.140 --> 00:26:31.420 single man 00:26:31.420 --> 00:26:31.620 Timothy. 00:26:31.620 --> 00:26:32.620 1 Timothy 00:26:32.620 --> 00:26:34.620 1 Timothy 00:26:34.620 --> 00:26:36.620 1 Timothy 00:26:36.620 --> 00:26:37.520 We'll pick it up 00:26:37.520 --> 00:26:38.520 at verse 1 00:26:38.520 --> 00:26:39.380 of chapter 5. 00:26:39.620 --> 00:26:40.620 1 Timothy 00:26:40.620 --> 00:26:41.920 do not rebuke 00:26:41.920 --> 00:26:42.519 an older man 00:26:42.519 --> 00:26:43.080 an older man 00:26:43.080 --> 00:26:43.400 harshly 00:26:43.400 --> 00:26:46.100 but exhort him 00:26:46.100 --> 00:26:47.180 as if he were 00:26:47.180 --> 00:26:48.039 your father 00:26:48.740 --> 00:26:51.600 1 Timothy 00:26:51.600 --> 00:26:51.960 2 Timothy 00:26:51.960 --> 00:26:52.880 treat younger 00:26:52.880 --> 00:26:53.320 men 00:26:53.320 --> 00:26:54.640 as your own 00:26:54.640 --> 00:26:55.000 brother 00:26:55.000 --> 00:26:57.400 1 Timothy 00:26:57.400 --> 00:26:58.400 3 Timothy 00:26:58.400 --> 00:26:59.620 treat older 00:26:59.620 --> 00:26:59.980 women 00:26:59.980 --> 00:27:01.480 as you would 00:27:01.480 --> 00:27:01.980 your own 00:27:01.980 --> 00:27:02.300 mother 00:27:04.400 --> 00:27:06.400 2 Timothy 00:27:06.400 --> 00:27:18.400 And Timothy, treat younger women as your sister with absolute purity. 00:27:18.400 --> 00:27:30.400 Now I think this is an excellent verse for telling us how single people should behave in a relationship and how they should treat each other. 00:27:30.400 --> 00:27:45.400 Let's just think about it. If you are single man or single darling and you have somebody who you are attracted to, are you going to start that relationship? 00:27:45.400 --> 00:27:55.400 How are you going to behave in that relationship? Well here's your guideline. You treat them as your sister. 00:27:55.400 --> 00:28:05.400 Would you sleep with your sister? Hmm? I'm not being rude, I'm being very practical and rude. 00:28:05.400 --> 00:28:17.400 Would you French kiss your sister? You wouldn't would you? Treat younger women as sisters. 00:28:17.400 --> 00:28:24.400 The relationship that you are in, treat them with absolute purity. 00:28:24.400 --> 00:28:32.400 And the reverse is also true for those who are women. If you are attracted to a guy. 00:28:32.400 --> 00:28:36.400 How are you going to treat them? How are you going to behave with them? 00:28:36.400 --> 00:28:46.400 Are you going to, would you flirt with your brother? Would you dress provocatively for your brother? 00:28:46.400 --> 00:28:57.400 Well you wouldn't. Well then don't do it to other young men. Treat them with absolute purity. 00:28:57.400 --> 00:29:02.400 And I think that's the message that Paul is seeking to communicate in 1 Corinthians 7. 00:29:02.400 --> 00:29:10.400 From verse 36. If you are acting improperly, there shouldn't be any improper behaviour in a relationship. 00:29:10.400 --> 00:29:19.400 There is a place for sexual expression. There is a place for what we have just talked about. 00:29:19.400 --> 00:29:26.400 But it is only within the context of marriage. And if you cannot control yourself and if you can't live your relationship properly, 00:29:26.400 --> 00:29:31.400 would you hurry up and get married and live properly? 00:29:35.400 --> 00:29:43.400 And if you do choose to get married, let me say this. Here are three C's that I think will be helpful. 00:29:43.400 --> 00:29:47.400 It's not here in the passage, but I think nonetheless it's helpful. 00:29:47.400 --> 00:29:51.400 Make sure that the person you marry is a Christian. 00:29:51.400 --> 00:29:57.400 In fact, actually, if you do look at chapter 7 verse 39. 00:29:57.400 --> 00:30:08.400 A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives, but if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes. 00:30:08.400 --> 00:30:12.400 But he must be long to the Lord. 00:30:12.400 --> 00:30:17.400 So make sure the person that you are going to marry is a Christian. 00:30:17.400 --> 00:30:22.400 Don't entertain the whole idea of, well I'll just get engaged with them, I'll just go out with them, 00:30:22.400 --> 00:30:27.400 and then hopefully they'll become a father of Jesus in time and everything will work out fine. 00:30:27.400 --> 00:30:33.400 Don't do it. You're heading down the road of destruction and a time of great difficulty. 00:30:35.400 --> 00:30:37.400 Sometimes it does happen. 00:30:37.400 --> 00:30:42.400 And for some, for other reasons, you may find that you are in a relationship 00:30:42.400 --> 00:30:47.400 and you are the only Christian within the relationship, within the marriage. 00:30:47.400 --> 00:30:50.400 Well, God is gracious in those times. 00:30:50.400 --> 00:30:52.400 He does know. 00:30:52.400 --> 00:30:54.400 Look at verse 12. 00:30:58.400 --> 00:30:59.400 Chapter 7 verse 12. 00:30:59.400 --> 00:31:02.400 And to the rest I say this, I, not the Lord. 00:31:02.400 --> 00:31:10.400 If any brother has a wife who is not a believer, and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. 00:31:10.400 --> 00:31:12.400 Verse 16. 00:31:12.400 --> 00:31:16.400 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? 00:31:16.400 --> 00:31:21.400 Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? 00:31:21.400 --> 00:31:28.400 So if you are in a married relationship and one is not a believer, God is gracious and through that marriage, 00:31:28.400 --> 00:31:30.400 the other one may become a Christian. 00:31:30.400 --> 00:31:36.400 But the answer here is, make sure the person you marry is a Christian. 00:31:37.400 --> 00:31:44.400 But not only should they be a Christian, make sure that they are also Christ-centred. 00:31:44.400 --> 00:31:49.400 Many people are Christians but they are lacking in their desire to serve God. 00:31:49.400 --> 00:31:54.400 Perhaps they are brand new Christians, maybe they are just immature. 00:31:54.400 --> 00:31:58.400 Maybe they just enjoy playing on the play station at the time. 00:31:58.400 --> 00:32:01.400 Don't lower your standards. 00:32:01.400 --> 00:32:03.400 Raise your standards. 00:32:03.400 --> 00:32:08.400 Marry those who have an undivided devotion to the Lord. 00:32:08.400 --> 00:32:13.400 Those who you are going to work with, where you can be in a church together, 00:32:13.400 --> 00:32:16.400 and serve the Lord wholeheartedly together. 00:32:16.400 --> 00:32:19.400 Don't lower your standards. 00:32:19.400 --> 00:32:26.400 And it's not just about spiritual matters. 00:32:26.400 --> 00:32:28.400 It's also to be very practical. 00:32:28.400 --> 00:32:32.400 There's no point in marrying somebody who just doesn't get on with. 00:32:32.400 --> 00:32:35.400 They've got to be compatible, haven't they? 00:32:35.400 --> 00:32:36.400 Get on with them. 00:32:36.400 --> 00:32:38.400 Similar likes to their own friends. 00:32:38.400 --> 00:32:43.400 Being able to talk to each other, relate and so on. 00:32:43.400 --> 00:32:51.400 But I think those GCs are a good guide in when we are seeking to get married. 00:32:51.400 --> 00:33:01.400 So if marriage is for you, and you find yourself single at this time, God is not going to make it hard for you. 00:33:01.400 --> 00:33:04.400 He doesn't aim to make life complicated. 00:33:04.400 --> 00:33:06.400 He is the giver of all gifts. 00:33:06.400 --> 00:33:11.400 And he will do exactly the same if he is going to provide you. 00:33:11.400 --> 00:33:13.400 He will do it in your time. 00:33:17.400 --> 00:33:19.400 So that's option one. 00:33:19.400 --> 00:33:21.400 Get married. 00:33:21.400 --> 00:33:26.400 The other option, and it's obvious as it may sound, is in verse 37. 00:33:26.400 --> 00:33:27.400 Remain single. 00:33:27.400 --> 00:33:30.400 Verse 37. 00:33:30.400 --> 00:33:41.400 But the man who has settled the matter in his own mind, who is under no compulsion, but has control over his own will. 00:33:41.400 --> 00:33:46.400 In other words, he's not struggling with the issues of verse 9. 00:33:46.400 --> 00:33:48.400 He's under control. 00:33:48.400 --> 00:33:52.400 Who is under no compulsion, but has control over his own will. 00:33:52.400 --> 00:34:00.400 And who has made up his mind not to marry the virgin, this man also does the right thing. 00:34:00.400 --> 00:34:07.400 Self-control is the calling of every Christian, and self-control is required if we are to remain single. 00:34:07.400 --> 00:34:14.400 Being single doesn't give us license to indulge in sexual promiscuity and be with whoever we want. 00:34:14.400 --> 00:34:28.400 And as we've said, singleness isn't for everyone, and nor is marriage. 00:34:28.400 --> 00:34:37.400 But if God has called you to a single life, he will equip you, and he will enable you to live a pure life. 00:34:37.400 --> 00:34:52.400 And if you've given yourself to the Lord in undivided devotion, he will see to it that he will care for you, that he will provide for you, and that he will keep you. 00:34:52.400 --> 00:34:55.400 So two options. 00:34:55.400 --> 00:35:01.400 But let's remember that our status can, and very often will, change. 00:35:01.400 --> 00:35:06.400 If you are single today, maybe, you will be married next to you. 00:35:06.400 --> 00:35:12.400 If you are married today, maybe, you will be single next year. 00:35:12.400 --> 00:35:15.400 None of us knows what the year lies ahead. 00:35:15.400 --> 00:35:26.400 But whatever our status is, God's gift is always right and always good, and we should celebrate it, and we should live wholeheartedly within that status, 00:35:26.400 --> 00:35:31.400 until time changes us, or until God should choose something different. 00:35:31.400 --> 00:35:33.400 Verse 38. 00:35:33.400 --> 00:35:50.400 So then, he who's married the virgin does right, but he who does not marry her does even better, simply because they can give their life wholeheartedly to the Lord. 00:35:50.400 --> 00:35:56.400 But I want to finish with this, and that is family support. 00:35:56.400 --> 00:35:59.400 The church is described as a family. 00:35:59.400 --> 00:36:02.400 We talked about marriage last week, singleness, simply. 00:36:02.400 --> 00:36:04.400 It's a family. 00:36:04.400 --> 00:36:07.400 Where everybody's status is different. 00:36:07.400 --> 00:36:10.400 Some people are married within the church family, some are unmarried. 00:36:10.400 --> 00:36:17.400 Some have children, some can't have children, some would love to have children, and that's going to be hard. 00:36:17.400 --> 00:36:18.400 Some may have children. 00:36:18.400 --> 00:36:21.400 Some may have a Christian spouse, some might not. 00:36:21.400 --> 00:36:29.400 Some are single by choice, others are single because it just doesn't happen. 00:36:29.400 --> 00:36:34.400 Some may be separated, some their spouse may be done. 00:36:34.400 --> 00:36:35.400 They can't do things. 00:36:35.400 --> 00:36:36.400 But if they need to be taken care of them, they're in a church family. 00:36:36.400 --> 00:36:37.400 They can't do things. 00:36:37.400 --> 00:36:46.400 The point is that within the church family we're all at different stages and we all need to take responsibility to care, support, and love each other. 00:36:46.400 --> 00:36:53.400 And so I want to throw this out to the married people, to the families who are here. 00:36:53.400 --> 00:37:02.400 It's going to be great to go home today, isn't it? To your house, have a nice lunch together. 00:37:02.400 --> 00:37:09.400 Why want to include others into your family life? Invite people for meals? 00:37:09.400 --> 00:37:14.400 What about holidays? What about trip-bites? 00:37:14.400 --> 00:37:22.400 Families, extend your boundaries and support those who are not nice. 00:37:22.400 --> 00:37:27.400 Now I'm not saying this because it doesn't happen within the life of this church. It does happen. 00:37:27.400 --> 00:37:32.400 So I just want to encourage them to keep on doing it and to do so more and more. 00:37:32.400 --> 00:37:38.400 Single people, as we said, are under huge pressure in this life. 00:37:38.400 --> 00:37:45.400 So they need a place to develop good, healthy and pure relationships within the context of a church family. 00:37:45.400 --> 00:37:50.400 Where people are caring for and looking after. 00:37:50.400 --> 00:37:59.400 So if you're single, it's God's gift. Will it last forever? I don't know. 00:37:59.400 --> 00:38:08.400 But if you are single, give your life in service to God and live your life with sexual purity. 00:38:08.400 --> 00:38:15.400 And church family, support one another every day. Let's pray. 00:38:15.400 --> 00:38:16.400 Amen. 00:38:16.400 --> 00:38:22.400 Our Father God, we thank you so much for your word to us. 00:38:22.400 --> 00:38:28.400 We thank you for the greatest gift of all that we belong to you. 00:38:28.400 --> 00:38:32.400 And that you love us and care for us and provide for us. 00:38:32.400 --> 00:38:33.400 Thank you for the greatest gift of all that we are in the world. 00:38:33.400 --> 00:38:34.400 Thank you for the greatest gift of all that we are in the world. 00:38:34.400 --> 00:38:39.400 Thank you that one day we are going to be in the new creation where we will have that eternal marriage. 00:38:39.400 --> 00:38:44.400 We will be with Christ forever and forever. 00:38:44.400 --> 00:38:51.400 Help us to keep our focus on what is good and right and pure. 00:38:51.400 --> 00:38:54.400 We pray for every single person represented here. 00:38:54.400 --> 00:38:57.400 That you would protect them in their lives, keep them pure. 00:38:57.400 --> 00:39:00.400 Help them to conduct their relationships wisely. 00:39:00.400 --> 00:39:04.400 Help them to live rightly. 00:39:04.400 --> 00:39:10.400 For those who are considering marriage, give them your wisdom. 00:39:10.400 --> 00:39:19.400 Provide the right spot that they may serve the Lord with undivided devotion. 00:39:19.400 --> 00:39:23.400 We pray that you will watch over each and every one of us. 00:39:23.400 --> 00:39:25.400 That we may care of you. 00:39:25.400 --> 00:39:26.400 To watch. 00:39:26.400 --> 00:39:28.400 In the name of Jesus. 00:39:28.400 --> 00:39:29.400 Amen. 00:39:29.400 --> 00:39:40.400 Well, I do encourage you to talk through any of the questions and the questions afterwards. 00:39:40.400 --> 00:39:43.400 So we can do that over here. 00:39:43.400 --> 00:39:46.400 We're going to sing one last song. 00:39:46.400 --> 00:39:47.400 Thank you. 00:39:47.400 --> 00:39:51.400 Thank you.