Thank you.
Proverbs chapter 5.
her steps lead straight to the grave.
She gives no thought to the way of life.
Her paths wander aimlessly
but she does not know it.
Now then, my sons,
listen to me.
Do not turn aside from what I say.
Keep to a path far from her.
Do not go near the door of her house
lest you lose your honour to others
and your dignity to one who is cruel.
Lest strangers feast on your wealth
and your toil enrich the house of another.
At the end of your life
you will groan
when your flesh and body are spent.
You will say,
how I hated discipline.
How my heart spurned correction.
I would not obey my teachers
or turn my ear to my instructors.
And I was soon in serious trouble
in the assembly of God's people.
Drink water from your own cistern.
Running water from your own well.
Should your springs overflow in the streets?
Your streams of water in the public squares?
Let them be yours alone.
Never to be shared with strangers.
May your fountain be blessed.
And may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
A loving doe.
A graceful deer.
May her breast satisfy you always.
May you ever be intoxicated with her love.
Why, my son,
be intoxicated with another man's wife?
Why embrace the bosom of a wayward woman?
For your ways are in full view of the Lord.
And he examines all your paths.
The evil deeds of the wicked ensnare them.
The cords of their sins hold them fast.
For lack of discipline,
they will die,
led astray
by their own great folly.
Well,
a serious text.
Let's pray
and ask for God's help.
Father,
as we look at your word today,
would you help me to carefully
and truthfully
speak and declare it?
Would you also guard us
from digging up our past
where things have already been forgiven and dealt with?
May we rejoice and know
that they are forgiven.
And yet,
if there are things that we need to address today
in our own personal lives,
would you gently work in us
by your spirit
leading us
to Christ?
Help us, we pray.
Amen.
A man dressed in a suit
sits down to dinner
after a busy day.
An elegant lady
walks towards him,
brushing against his shoulder.
mother.
She turns with a smile
and apologises.
She's got his attention.
A conversation
starts.
Social media
will reveal
the rest of the story
to us.
A well-known
community worker
cheats on wife.
Pastor caught
with prostitute.
What we might call
a honey trap,
Proverbs calls
honey lips.
Look at verse 3.
For the lips
of the adulterous woman
drip honey
and her speech
is smoother
than oil.
Or as we would say,
smoother
and softer
than silk.
You see,
the message
of Proverbs
chapter 5
is very clear
to us.
And it's simply this.
Listen
to the wisdom
of God's words
so that you
stay clear
of free love's
empty words.
Listen to the wisdom
of God's word
so that we
stay clear
of free love's
empty words.
Verse 7.
Now then,
my sons,
listen to me.
Do not
turn aside
from what I say.
Keep to a path
far from her.
Do not
go near
to the door
of her house.
Verse 20.
Why,
my son,
be intoxicated
with another man's wife?
Why embrace
the bosom
of a wayward woman?
For your ways
are in full view
of the Lord.
and he examines
all your paths.
Be careful
of the sweet
words
from honey lips.
Sexual freedom
is good for you.
It's your body
and your choice.
If it feels good,
then it must be good.
Don't wait.
Just do it.
An explosion
of TV shows
entice us
to follow
our desires.
Believe it or not,
this is what is
on your TV screens.
Naked attraction.
Love island.
I kissed a boy
or I kissed a girl.
Too hot to handle.
Dating naked.
The bachelor.
Ex on the beach.
The great sex experiment.
And add to that
the plethora
of dating apps,
porn sites,
romance novels.
For the lips
of the adulterous
man
or woman
drip honey
and their speech
is smoother
than oil.
What harm is there
in a one-night stand?
Why limit yourself
to just
one person?
You're free
to scroll through
endless porn videos
on your phone.
You're free
to experiment
and see
what you
like.
But there's a problem
with all of that.
Honey lips
only tells us
one side
of the story.
Look at verse 4.
In the end
she is
bitter as gall
sharp as a
double-edged sword.
It's like
biting into a lemon.
Your mouth
is immediately
full of
sweet sensations
driving you wild
but
the bitter
aftertaste
lingers long.
Verse 5.
Her feet
go down
to death.
Her steps
lead straight
to the grave.
Oh the promises
for so much
pleasure
but a life
of destruction
is the price
for momentary
satisfaction.
So whether
we are young
or old
whether we are
married
or single
be careful
of
honey lips
or
people
are young
or
people
or
people
are young
people
are young
or
people
!
Well first
!
The big thing
that we need
to learn
is the folly
or the stupidity
of sexual
freedom.
Verse 8.
Keep to a path
far from her
or him.
Do not go near
the door
of their house.
Stay away
from honey
lips.
don't engage
with free
love's
offer
because
it's not
free.
It's
costly.
It will
cost you
relationally.
Verse 9.
Lest you
lose your
honour
or your
relationships
to others
and your
dignity
your respect
to one
who is
cruel.
The husband
who has
an affair
the wife
who fantasises
about the
man at work
is never
ever
private.
It costs
you
your
relationships
your
relationship
with your
spouse
with your
children
with your
friends
with your
colleagues.
Well why
do you say
that?
Well because
through your
actions
you've
broken
trust
you've
told lies
you've
cheated
and as
you give
yourself
to one
so you
are always
withholding
your love
from others.
It's the
same
for teens
and young
men.
Hours of
watching porn
means you
actually lose
the ability
to relate
to women
as you
should.
Teen
boys just
become angry
with their
mothers.
young
men
treat
women
as just
mere
physical
objects
of
pleasure
to
serve
their
needs
some
kind
of
conquest
exercise.
For
young
women
who give
their
bodies
freely
in search
of love
well it
leads to
a hatred
of self
as they
are used
by one
partner
after another.
you look
in the
mirror
and you
don't like
what you
see.
Sexual
freedom
is not
free
it costs
you
relationally.
All those
programs
and TV
are but a
lie
seductive
words that
entangle
you in a
broken
mess.
not just
relationally
but it
can cost
you
financially.
Verse
10
Lest
strangers
feast
on your
wealth
and all
your
toil
all your
hard work
your
well-earned
money
enrich
the house
of another.
We've
seen it
an affair
can quickly
turn to
blackmail
a one-night
stand to
a child
that needs
ongoing
support
and financial
care.
Breakups
separation
and divorce
leads to
a division
of assets
where no
one wins
after the
solicitors
take their
cut.
Sexual
freedom
can lead
to addiction
and the
buying of
sex
whether
that's
online
or with
real
people.
Soon
your
stability
becomes
an
uncontrolled
debt.
Sexual
freedom
is
never
free.
It
costs
us
financially.
In
fact
it will
lead
to a
life
of
desperate
deep
regret.
Verse
11
at
the
end
of
your
life
you
will
groan
when
your
flesh
and
body
are
spent.
When
you're
left
and
you
can
do
nothing
but
just
sit.
Verse
12
you will
look
back
and reflect
on your
life
and you
will
say
how I
had
hated
discipline
how my
heart
had
spurned
correction.
I
would
not
obey
my
teachers
or
turn
my
ear
to
my
instructors.
I
wish
I
could
have
started
all
over
again.
I
wish
I
had
made
better
choices
in
my
life.
Why
didn't
I
listen
when
I
heard
that
sermon
on
Proverbs
5?
The
folly
of
sexual
freedom
is
this.
It
is
costly
and
it
leaves
us
with
deep
regret.
Verse
23
For
lack
of
discipline
they
will
die
led
astray
by
their
own
great
folly.
Be
careful
of
honey
lips
whether
it
is
him
or
her
and
their
seductive
words
it
leads
to
a
broken
mess.
Second
the
joy
of
faithful
marriage.
You
see
while
sexual
freedom
is
wrong
and
destructive
there
is a
context
where
sick
sex
is
good
and
beautiful.
Look
at
verse
17
let
them
be
yours
alone
never
to
be
shared
with
strangers.
He's
talking
about
marriage
and it's
within
marriage
that we
find
joyful
sexual
pleasure
but not
just
as we
want
because
first
there
is
boundaries
for
sex.
Verse
15
drink
water
from
your
own
cistern
running
water
from
your
own
well.
The
imagery
is
poetic
and
clear.
It's
simply
saying
have
sex
with
your
own
wife
enjoy
intimacy
with
your
own
husband.
Quench
your
thirst
for
sexual
pleasure
with
the
one
you
are
married
to.
Our
bodies
are not
to be
shared
around.
Verse
16
Should
your
springs
overflow
in the
streets?
Your
streams
of
water
in the
public
squares?
If
you're
married
don't
go
giving
yourself
to
anyone
else.
You
belong
to
your
spouse.
Guard
your
marriage.
Protect
your
marriage.
Don't
exchange
your
lover
with
the
images
on
screen
or
the
fantasies
within
your
head.
You
see
sex
is
God's
idea
not
ours
and
the
only
right
and
good
context
is
within
a
marriage.
A
union
of
one
man
and
one
woman
for
life
or
until
death
parts.
So
there
are
boundaries
that
we
must
take
note
of.
But
with
boundaries
in
place
there
is
pleasure.
Sometimes
we can
get the
impression
certainly
from
social
media
and
from
what
we
listen
to
other
places
that
God
is
anti
sex.
That
sex
is only
for
making
babies.
Well
look
at
how
the
author
delights
in
his
wife.
Verse
19
A
loving
doe
a
graceful
deer.
I
often
wondered
what
Kirsty
would
think
if I
called
her
a
graceful
doe
or a
loving
deer.
I'm
not
quite
sure
what
response
I
would
get
but
obviously
there
was
some
romantic
image
their
slenderness
their
sleekness
but
as we
go
on
it
needs
no
explanation
does
it?
May
her
breasts
satisfy
you
always.
May
you
ever
be
intoxicated
with
her
love.
We
are
reading
the
Bible.
That
is
what
it
says.
God
designed
men
and
women
differently
so
wives
and
husbands
can
take
pleasure
in
each
other.
Look
at the
end
of
verse
19.
May
you
ever
be
intoxicated
with
her
love.
Yes
there
are
boundaries
but
within
marriage
you
are
free
to
enjoy
each
other.
Literally
it's
saying
get
drunk
in
each
other's
love.
You
see
a
healthy
sexual
relationship
binds
and
strengthens
the
marriage.
intimacy
leads
to
security.
In
fact
a
marriage
that
is
healthy
means
that
you
will
function
better.
Out
of
your
love
for
one
another
will
overflow
love
to
other
people.
Your
service
of
one
another
and
to
each
other
will
overflow
in
service
to
each
other.
If
we're
not
at
one
with
our
spouse
well then
we are
not in
a good
place
to serve
and love
and care
for others.
Now before
we move
on
there are
two things
that I
want us
to note.
It's
not on the
screen but
here we are.
The first
is
sex is
never
demanded.
when man
and woman
get married
yes we
submit and
surrender
ourselves
to each
other.
What is
his belongs
to hers
what is
hers belongs
to him.
Sex is
to be
given
willingly
and lovingly.
It is
never to
be forced
or
coerced.
Marriage
doesn't
give you
the right
to do
what you
like
when you
like.
It is
a beautiful
gift
designed
by God
given
in the
context
of marriage
to serve
each
other.
Never
demanded.
And the
second thing
is this
sex is
not
everything.
So whether
we're married
or single
here today
sex doesn't
determine
your joy.
Our joy
is ultimately
found not
in the
gifts that
God gives
us but
in God
himself who
is the
giver.
Our joy
is in
God who
made us
who loved
us and
he only
gives what
is good
and best
for us.
It's in
our relationship
with God
that we
are ultimately
and truly
satisfied.
So the
joy of a
faithful marriage
is this
sex within
the boundaries
of marriage
is good
and beautiful
and gives
you joyful
pleasure.
So first
we've got
the folly
of sexual
freedom and
its destruction
leading to
death and
then second
we have
the joy
of a
faithful
marriage.
God's good
designs,
his boundaries
and the
freedom to
enjoy his
good gifts.
But third,
the purity
for sinful
choices.
I think
there's two
big
applications
from Proverbs
5 that I
think we need
to consider
together this
morning.
warning.
The first
is this,
the warning.
Now you
might be here
and you're
thinking,
well what's
the harm?
What if I do
venture down the
path of sexual
freedom?
It's only just
a bit of fun.
I can always
turn back
onto the
right path.
Well you
can't.
You see
sexual sin
as with
any sin
enslaves
you.
It
controls
you and
masters
you.
You think
you're in
control but
sin's tentacles
are gripped
around you.
Look at
verse 22.
The evil
deeds of the
wicked ensnare
them, the
cords of
their sins,
their tentacles
hold them
fast.
For lack
of discipline
they will
die, led
astray by
their own
great folly.
You see
the rewards
of sexual
freedom, the
cost of all
of our sin,
whatever that
may be, is
not ultimately
satisfaction but
death.
That's the
reason we
all die.
is because
we are
enslaved to
sin.
A death
that is not
just physical
but leads
to a
separation
from God
and from
all that is
good for
all eternity.
Honey lips
may entice
you with
her lies
or his
lies but
all it does
is lead to
a life of
emptiness from
which we
cannot break
free.
verse 6
she gives
no thought
to the
way of
life.
Her
paths
wander
aimlessly
and she
doesn't
even
know it.
And that's
what will
happen to
us.
Sure a
bit of
porn is
no harm.
A moment
of playful
sex with
my boyfriend
or girlfriend
it's all
just fun.
No.
it takes
you down
a path
of destruction
and you
don't even
know you're
on it.
Wisdom's
message is
don't come
to the end
of your life
in regret
where you
face death
without the
forgiveness
and love
and kindness
of our God.
Accept
the discipline
of wisdom
now and
repent
turn back
to God
and he
will forgive
you
and he
will renew
you and
restore to
you the
joy of
salvation.
Which
brings us
to the
second
application
and I
think perhaps
this is where
it hits
home for
most of
us.
Yes we
need the
warning
but perhaps
for most
of us
it's
cleansing.
We look
back on
our life
we look
at our
present
life
and we
see the
devastating
impact of
our sinful
choices.
You see
not one of
us here in
this room
can say
I am
pure.
Verse
21
for our
ways
are in
full view
of the
Lord
and he
examines
all
our
paths.
God
sees all
my
actions
he knows
all about
my
thoughts
in fact
for most
of us as we
listen and as we
think about
this we can
become overcome
with guilt
and shame
because of
our sexual
sin.
We feel
ashamed
and dirty.
We long
to be washed
and made
clean.
We want
to be
pure.
Well that's
the wisdom
of God's
word to us
today and
where it is
pointing us.
It is leading
us to Christ
who will
clean us
of every
stain
and blemish.
You see
the marriage
that we
were looking
at,
the joyful
marriage
is a
relationship
pointing to
a better
and greater
marriage to
come.
The sexual
pleasure of
marriage is
only just
a foretaste
of the
ultimate
joy of
being in
a right
relationship
with God
and being
with him
in his
eternal
kingdom
forever.
Turn with
me please
to
Ephesians
chapter 5.
Ephesians
chapter 5.
Ephesians
chapter 5.
Here Paul
has been
talking about
marriage.
A
wonderful gift
from God.
He's been
talking about
how the
wife gives
herself to
her husband
and how
the husband
gives himself
to his
wife
in every
way.
But this
marriage
relationship
points to
something
better,
to someone
who is
greater.
Let's pick
it up in
verse 25.
Husbands,
love your
wives.
Well, how
do we do
that?
Just as
Christ loved
the church
and gave
himself up
for her.
You see,
our earthly
marriages, if
we can call
it that,
are pointing
to a
greater
marriage
between
Christ
and his
people.
Verse 26,
to make
her
holy,
cleansing
her by
the washing
with water
through the
word or
through the
gospel,
to present
her to
himself as
a radiant
church
without
stain or
wrinkle
or any
other
blemish,
but
holy
and
blameless.
Do you
see what
he's saying
here?
In all
that we
have said
so far,
you who
are overcome
with guilt
and shame,
you who
have the
stain of
sexual
sin,
he's
saying,
come to
Jesus
because he
loves
you,
because
God sent
his son
Jesus
Christ
into the
sexual
chaos of
this world.
He came
to rescue
us from
the brokenness
of our
sinful
choices.
In
love,
verse 25,
he gave
himself up
for her.
Jesus
gave himself
up for
us,
that is,
he died
for us
on the
cross.
He takes
all of
our impurity
on himself
so that
we in
turn might
receive
his
purity.
He did
this so
that we
would be
made
beautiful
for him
like a
bride
dressed
for her
husband.
How
wonderful
is that?
Come
to
Jesus.
Let us
confess our
most hidden
and secret
sin.
Trust in
him and
he will
cleanse
us.
He will
wash away
your sin
forever.
Verse 27,
he will
present her
to himself
as a
radiant
church
without
stain or
wrinkle
or any
other
blemish
but holy
and
blameless.
You see,
as we
entrust
ourselves
to Christ,
we are
in Christ,
the only
one who
is truly
beautiful
and right
and pure
and so
God will
look at
you and
see the
beauty
and purity
of his
son and
you will
remain in
his presence
and enjoy
his good
gifts
forever.
You see,
through Christ
all our
sin and
guilt is
dealt
with.
We are
now pure
ready as
a bride
for that
ultimate
marriage to
come when
Christ comes
again and
takes his
church to
be with him
in the new
heavens and
the new
earth.
A life
with Christ
where there
is joy and
pleasures
now and
forevermore.
Don't
listen to
the silky
words of
sexual
freedom.
It will
destroy you.
Instead,
let us
together
listen to
the wisdom
of God's
words
because they
are good
and they
will save
you.
Let's
pray.
Let's
pray.
Let's
pray.
Let's
pray.
Father,
thank you
that your
word
is like
honey,
sweet
as a
honeycomb.
it is
good
and it
is right.
Thank you
for your
good design
of us
for our
lives
and for
the good
gifts that
you give
to us.
Father,
help us
to live
according to
your path
and your
wisdom
and your
ways.
Help us
forever to
run to
Christ,
to receive
from him
cleansing,
washing.
Thank you
that in
Christ all
that is
freely
available
in abundance
for every
kind of
sin.
Help us
to walk
in your
paths this
week.
Help us
to reflect
your good
design
to the
world in
which we
live.
Help us
to point
others
to Jesus.
And it's
in his
name we
pray.
Amen.