Ephesians chapter 6 verses 1 to 4, children and parents.
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise,
that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.
Fathers, do not exasperate your children.
Instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
Thank you very much.
Thanks, Ralph.
Sorry, I'll just get myself adjusted here.
Thank you.
Okay, good morning, everyone.
Today, I want us to look at the topic of, well, in particular children, but also parents in the church.
And many of us this morning fall into the category of being a parent, and so I want to speak to you especially.
And some of us fall into the category of children.
I want to speak to you especially as well.
Some are children here legally, because, well, you're under 18, so you're a child.
And some are here as children practically.
So, okay, you've gotten over 18, but mom and dad are still paying most of the bills.
And you haven't quite reached full independence yet, have you?
Okay, so whether you're a legal child or a functional child, listen up this morning.
Now, if you're not a child or a parent, I know what you're already thinking.
Well, please don't think that you have a sermon-free Sunday ahead where the old lights can switch off and you can start staring at the ceiling.
Because I want us all to see, and I hope this is what we see, that discussions around children and parents, what we're going to look at this morning,
even though we're talking about children and parents in a physical family, we're doing so in the context of another family.
And the context of that other family is the church, a spiritual family, which we are all part of,
regardless of our status as a parent or a child or anything like that.
So this sermon is for all of us as the church, as God's people.
But let's come back to parents and children.
Why are you here with family this morning?
Have you ever sat down as a family and had that conversation?
Why do we go to church?
For parents, it might be as simple as this, and this is just one option.
You come to church.
Your children are going to come to church.
You see value in the church providing a stabilizing influence on your child's life,
and that's going to equip them into the future and somehow help them in the long term to have a successful and a happy and a well-adjusted life.
So you're here as parents.
Your children are going to come, and you see benefit to that.
And if you're here as a child, well, then, you know, it's very possible that you're only here because it's expected.
Maybe you're just here out of habit.
It's grand, but really it's a bit samey each week.
I've recounted the bricks behind the preacher's head a hundred times, and, you know, they haven't changed in all that time.
It's not something I look forward to.
You know, none of my friends are here.
It's just a bit of a, I don't know.
I'm sure I'm here anyway.
Now, don't misunderstand me when I say that about parents and motivation and children and motivation.
It's great, and it's good that you are here this morning for whatever reason.
There is genuinely no better place to be on a Sunday than gathering here as a church that is being built by Jesus.
But let's consider what it means to be here as children in the church,
and let us consider what it means to be here as parents in the church.
Is it possible that we can shape our understanding and motivation this morning by using the Word of God,
that sharp sword that divides to the very heart of the issue,
so that we can take the Word of God and take children and parents and bring the Word to bear on it and learn from the Bible?
Then, as we come as a child or as we come as a parent, we're coming together, together in God's community,
not just out of habit or expectation or compulsion,
but we will want to come because of the irresistible call of God on our lives,
to be in fellowship with Him and to be in fellowship with other believers.
And then that burden and guilt that comes from those faulty ideas of church attendance
can be replaced by the big picture of God's kingdom.
And, you know, that's where I want to be, and I hope it's where you want to be this morning as well.
The first thing is that I think our vision is really quite dull.
For many reasons, you know, we like verses in the Bible like Ephesians chapter 6, verses 1 to 4,
and we are going to focus on these verses this morning.
The verses, as you look at them in your Bible, they're short, direct.
You know, here are some things for children.
We move on.
Verse 4, here are some things for fathers.
Mr. Preacher, we say, just give me a few stories to help me understand.
Give me a few extra applications to think about.
So I read these verses, help me understand, and give me a few stories, a few applications,
and maybe even encourage me to practice them this week.
And that's often how we come to our Bibles and maybe come on a Sunday.
We want the Bible to function like a kind of a look-up manual for life.
So it kind of goes like this.
Well, career, career.
I should look at my Bible.
So we try and find some verses on work, and that's it.
We dip in and find those verses about work.
And we want to tune up our marriage.
You know, we feel that tension.
And, well, the Bible, it's a marriage manual.
You know, I can find some verses.
Actually, if I look back at the end of chapter 5,
wives and husbands, some good verses, maybe they'll come in handy someday.
I must remember that, Ephesians 5, marriage.
Children and how to raise them.
Well, there are verses for that, aren't they?
We have some in front of us.
But instead of doing that, if we take the time, like we're doing now,
and we read the Bible as it is,
as the Word of God to us as believers,
I think we quickly find out that it's not really a parenting manual after all.
It's not really functioning as a marriage manual after all.
You see the Bible.
The Bible, if it's a manual at all,
it's a manual on how to know God.
That's what the Bible is primarily.
So as we open it up and look for verses about children,
if we want to think about children and parenting,
I want us to remember two things.
And the first thing is that,
actually there aren't that many verses directly about children at all.
In the New Testament letters,
there are just two passages, I think,
and I'm open to correction,
that are directed to children.
So there's the one that we've read in Ephesians,
these couple of verses here, in Ephesians chapter 6,
and there's nearly identical words in Colossians chapter 3,
also written by the Apostle Paul,
so the same author.
And he has similar things to say in both places.
So the Bible has very little,
in terms of direct commands,
about living as Christian children.
So the Bible has very little direct commands,
directed to Christian children.
There's maybe less than five in total in the New Testament.
And the second thing I want us to notice,
as we go about trying to look at children and parenting the Bible,
is that if we take that approach of just looking at those verses,
we're going to really miss what God is saying to children,
if we just focus on those verses.
In our eagerness to want to make life simple and easy,
we just miss the point.
You see, the most amazing thing about Ephesians chapter 6,
and these verses 1 to 4,
is the context in which Paul is addressing children.
You see, Paul's letter is written to believers in the church,
and we see that right from the beginning.
Ephesians chapter 1 and verse 1.
If you turn back to the start of Ephesians,
you'll see that.
Paul is very good at introducing himself,
Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God,
to the saints in Ephesus,
the faithful in Christ Jesus.
Saints, or holy ones,
or those that have been called out of darkness
and called into the light.
That's who Paul is writing to.
So when Paul turns then,
if we get to chapter 6 and verse 1,
and he says,
children,
obey your parents in the Lord,
for this is right,
the children that he's speaking to here
are part of that group.
From chapter 1 and verse 1,
it's the same group.
It's the saints in Ephesus.
Believers.
Children are part of the church.
Children are there as believers,
as those who have been born again,
as those that are able to sit in the congregation
and have a letter from the apostle Paul
read out to them,
a letter that applies to them
from chapter 1, verse 1,
all the way through to chapter 6 and verse 24.
And then when we hit 6, 1,
and he speaks to children,
it's in that big context.
It's not that everything else that's gone before
and everything else that goes after
doesn't apply to children in the church.
Not at all.
All of it applies.
You see, as I said,
I think our hearts are quite dull at times,
and our vision is quite dull.
We want this book to function like a rule book,
to sort our lives out.
That's our tendency, isn't it,
in our hearts.
We like the law.
We like the rules
that we can measure ourselves again.
And the Lord instead offers us
this amazing book,
a book that's full of poetry,
a book that's full of history
and prophecy, music,
proverbs,
and instruction,
so that we can know God
in ways that we would never know Him
if it was just a manual.
Imagine if it was just a book
of things to do.
Would we know the Lord?
No, but it's the way
all those passages interact
and the richness
and the depth
of what God has given us.
So let's expand some of our horizons
this morning
and consider children
by seeing what the church is.
And there's a number of things
I just want to look at from Ephesians.
Believing children
are included in God's new people.
There's lots of images
to describe the church,
and there's no one image
that captures everything.
But one of the images
that Paul uses
to help us understand the church
is that of
a new people of God
or a new person of God.
He tells us that those
who were previously
outside of God's plan,
they are the Gentiles,
those who were uncircumcised.
And to be a Gentile
basically meant
that you weren't a Jew.
So there was one national group
called the Jews
who were circumcised.
And in every other nation
in the world,
I assume all of us here,
and nations all over the world,
all of those other people
were considered Gentiles.
And they were, in a sense,
outside of God's plan,
or it looked like
they were outside of God's plan.
But those who were
previously outside,
because of the coming of Jesus,
have been included
in God's people.
And that means
some radical changes
for the people of God
in the New Testament.
And we see that
in chapter 2.
So if you could turn
to chapter 2
in your Bibles,
I think it'll be a help.
Chapter 2,
and reading
verse 11.
Therefore,
remember that formally,
you who were Gentiles
by birth
and called uncircumcised
by those who call themselves
a circumcision,
that done in the body
by the hands of men,
remember that that time
you were separate from Israel,
separate from Christ,
excluded from citizenship
in Israel,
and foreigners
to the covenants
of the promise
without hope
and without God
in the world.
And this is the big but.
But now,
in Christ Jesus,
you who once far away
have been brought near
through the blood of Christ.
For he himself
is our peace
who has made
the two one.
You see that?
Who has made the two one
and destroyed the barrier,
the dividing line
of,
dividing wall
of hostility
by abolishing
in his flesh
the law
with its commandments
and regulations.
And this is the key bit.
His purpose
was to create himself
one new man
out of the two,
thus making peace,
and in this one body
to reconcile both of them
to God
through the cross
by which he put to death
their hostility.
So you see,
we have Jews
who believed in Jesus
and we have Gentiles
who believed in Jesus.
And they've come together
and they are God's new one man
or God's new people.
And we need to remember that
so when we come to Ephesians
chapter 6 verse 1
and we read
children,
obey your parents
and the Lord
for this is right,
that Paul is writing
to believe in children.
And Paul sees children
in the church
as part of this new man.
It is a new humanity
that's made up
of young and old
who have been reconciled
together
regardless of age
if they believe
through Jesus' death.
So as we gather,
as we gather as adults,
as we gather as children,
as children,
we're gathering
as God's new people.
You see,
Jesus in his death
has torn down
all kinds of barriers.
We see here
that he's torn down
barriers between
the Jews
and the Gentiles,
those who are on the inside
and those who are
on the outside.
Jesus' death
tears down barriers
between men and women,
between races,
between gender,
between status
and community.
Tears down barriers,
I believe,
of age as well
between an adult
and a child.
This is not a community
that you were born
physically into.
You don't inherit traits.
We don't inherit
the name Christian
because of our parents.
You know,
we named our son,
our eldest son,
Christopher.
And that means
one who carries
Christ in his heart.
So, you know,
that sounds great.
But in naming him
Christopher,
it didn't make him
carry Christ in his heart.
You understand that.
It doesn't,
just because we gave him
the name,
doesn't mean that
changed him fundamentally.
But it is our hope
for our son
that as he grows
and as he learns
he puts his trust
in Jesus
so his name
would become true
eventually
that he would be
one who carries Christ.
But it doesn't
function like that.
We don't bequeath
our belief
to our children.
No,
this is a community,
the church,
that you are born
spiritually into.
The new people of God
means that children
are here as believers
in their own right.
Children are here
as believers
on the same footing
as adults
because of their trust
in Jesus.
The second thing
we want to see
from Ephesians
is that of
the growing
in the body of Christ.
Children are part
of the body of Christ.
Our connection
to Christ
is such that Paul
can talk about
us being the body
of Christ
and we need to be
careful here
in our heads
the kind of image
we have.
It doesn't mean
that Christ needs us
in order in some way
to be complete
that apart from his body
Christ is somehow
less than God.
If it wasn't for us
well then Christ
would be going around
like a disembodied head
with no limbs
and no torso.
Rather to say
that we are his body
is that we are
united by faith
to Jesus
and we become
like Jesus.
And another way
that we are his body
is the idea
of growing together.
So we are united
to Christ
we are like Christ
and therefore
are his body.
But I think
one of the most
helpful things
again an image
of the church
is that we are
growing together
children and adults
alike.
There is one body
and we see that
in Ephesians
chapter 4
and we are going
to move a bit
around Ephesians
so it is good
if you can keep
your Bibles open.
Ephesians chapter 4
you see there
at the start
of chapter 4
verse 4
there is one body
and one spirit.
And as you go
down through those
verses Paul
goes on to speak
of the gifts
that God has given
to the church
so that if we
come down
let's see
to Ephesians
chapter 4
verse 12
and he talks
about the gifts.
The gifts are given
to prepare God's people
for works of service
so that the body
of Christ
may be built up
until we all
reach unity
in the faith
and in the knowledge
of the Son of God
and become mature
attaining to the
whole measure
of the fullness
of Christ.
And down to
verse 15
chapter 4
instead
speaking the truth
in love
we will in all things
grow up into him
who is the head
that is Christ
and from him
the whole body
joined and held together
by every supporting
ligament
grows
and builds itself
up in love
so as each
part
does
its
work.
It's a beautiful
picture of the church
as a living organism
full of life
as it grows
towards maturity.
Each member
of the body
has an important
part in supporting
the others.
Children
that love Jesus
I don't know if you've
thought about this
children that love Jesus
and know Jesus
have the spirit
of Christ
living in them
as much as
you as an adult
as the spirit
of Christ
which means
that they display
the fruit
of the spirit
and I believe
have gifts
from the spirit
gifts that are
given by the Holy
Spirit to children
so they can help
build the body
they are part of
this body building
work
so we need to
consider how
children can serve
and minister
in this church
in the church
and in this church
in particular
and that's
I don't have time
to expound that
but it's a thought
I want us to
take away this
morning and
consider further
how can we
actively include
our children
in this body
work
because these
verses
it's important
now
finally
in this part
believing children
need to keep
coming back
to the gospel
message
believing children
and adults
you see
the reason why
we're part of the
body
and the reason
why we're
growing into
God's new people
is because we
believe the same
message
the same
unique message
of Jesus
Christ
so our growth
together as the
body of Christ
into the people
of God
is only because
we have been
made alive
in Christ
in the first
place
children
you are not
saved
and I have to
reinforce this
again
you are not
saved by your
parents faith
children
you are not
saved by how
well you obey
them in the
home
children
you are not
saved by your
ability not
to fight with
your brother
and sister
okay
they are not
the things
that save
you
children
you come
into the
family of
God
and the
body of
Christ
because of
grace
because of
grace
undeserved
love that's
been shown
to you
by your
heavenly
father
I want to
read a
slightly longer
section
Ephesians
chapter 2
from verse 1
if you'd like
to turn there
just the 10
verses there
and just
for us to
take in the
sweep of
what it
means to
be born
again
it's an
old fashioned
phrase in
some ways
and one that
drops out of
usage sometimes
in Christian
circles
but it's a
good one
to be born
again for
those that
know the
reality of
what it is
to be alive
in Christ
I want you
this morning
adult and
child alike
to be reminded
of these
words to
live again
in the
truth that
you have
been shown
and if
these words
do not
resonate with
your heart
then I
think you
need to
ask am
I still
dead in
my own
sins
now this
is serious
we're either
alive or
we're dead
this morning
to these
words
so I
ask that
as the
word of
God
peels
back the
layers of
your life
ask yourself
do these
words of
scripture
do they
penetrate
and rest
in my
heart
or do
they cause
a stabbing
of my
conscience
Ephesians
chapter 2
and verse
1
as for
you
you were
dead in
your
transgressions
and sins
in which
you used
to live
when you
followed the
ways of
this world
and of
the ruler
of the
kingdom
of the
air
the spirit
who is
now at
work
in those
who are
disobedient
all of
us also
lived among
them at
one time
gratifying
the cravings
of our
sinful
nature
and following
its desires
and thoughts
like the
rest we
were by
nature
objects
of wrath
but
because of
his great
love for
us
God who
is rich
in mercy
made us
alive with
Christ
even when
we were
dead in
transgressions
it is by
grace you
have been
saved
and God
raised us
up with
Christ
and seated
us with
him in
the heavenly
realms
in Christ
Jesus
in order
that in
the coming
ages
he might
show the
incomparable
riches of
his grace
expressed in
his kindness
to us
in Christ
Jesus
for it
is by
grace you
have been
saved
through faith
and it's
not from
yourselves
it is the
gift of
God
not by
works
so that
no one
can boast
for we
were God's
workmanship
created in
Christ Jesus
to do
good works
which God
prepared
in advance
for us
to do
finally
I want us
to come
back to
Ephesians
chapter 6
it might
seem like a
big detour
but I
think it's
absolutely
critical
if we're
going to
look at
verses
like the
ones in
Ephesians
chapter 6
that we
look at
that
those
ideas
of the
church
and what
it means
firstly
I want
to come
back again
to those
that don't
consider
themselves
children
or don't
consider
themselves
parents
or think
they're past
that stage
please
listen
I think
one
application
one thing
to take
on board
is that
you have
a role
to play
you have
a role
to play
as part
of the
new
people
of God
to be
a
spiritual
parent
to others
and I hope
you see
that being
part of
the community
of God
being a
parent
and being
a child
and those
things are
secondary
we have
a primary
role
and we
can consider
ourselves
as spiritual
parents
to others
and I
believe
especially
you can
be a
spiritual
parent
to
children
in the
church
whether
that's
in direct
service
of something
like
creche
or Sunday
school
like what's
happening
outside
now
or just
by being
here each
Sunday
and offering
a kind
word of
encouragement
to our
children
to our
kids
in the
church
I hope
that you
see from
Ephesians
that your
role in
the body
in the
family
of God
absolutely
matters
okay
so as we
look now
just the
children and
parents in
particular
don't
don't think
it's not
for me
it is
all of it
is in
that
context
I
trust
it's
plain
and as
we come
to chapter
six and
verse one
and read
children
obey your
parents in
the Lord
for this
is right
that Paul
is speaking
directly to
children in
the church
body
he expects
them to be
there
he expects
the children
to be in
church in
Ephesus
hearing this
letter read
out
and these
children are
believers
and these
children are
part of the
church
in their
own right
all of
this
sections
about
section
about
relationships
so starting
from the
middle of
chapter five
wives and
husbands
children and
parents
slaves and
masters
all of this
section is
about relationships
within and
transform because
of the church
that's the
primary context
so yes
as I've said
Christ has
made us all
one
the new
people of
God
his body
the church
but that
doesn't mean
that the
structures
outside the
church
have somehow
disbanded
and there's
no longer
children or
parents
and that all
are left
are identical
Lego versions
of people
in the church
we're all
the same
that's not
right
no
husbands and
wives are
still husbands
and wives
in the church
children and
parents are
still children
and parents
in the church
and slaves
and masters
or I guess
more applicable
to most of us
the idea of
employers and
employees
are still
employers and
employees in
the church
and you know
are still slaves
and masters
in the church
so I want to
see that Paul
is addressing
children and
parents as
children and
parents within
the context of
this body
the church
community
so Paul
can say
then in
chapter 6
and verse 1
children obey
your parents
in the Lord
you see
obedience is to
be powered
in children
that know
Jesus
not by sheer
will
but they're
to have the
help of the
Holy Spirit
because they
know Jesus
themselves
because these
children have
been born again
they can obey
their parents
now in the
Lord
children
do you know
Jesus as
your Lord
then you
should obey
your parents
in the Lord
for this
is right
and that phrase
at the end
I think it gives
us a sense
that it's
obvious
it's obvious
it's right
the world
over
even apart
from the Bible
even if you
didn't have
the Bible
even if you
didn't know
Jesus
we simply
know that
being part
of this
creation
part of
this world
that it
is right
and proper
to obey
our parents
but now
now you
can do it
as a believer
in the life
of the church
as children
and parents
that are
growing together
in the body
do you see
that
your obedience
to your parents
is transformed
you grow
together
in the same
body
and the joy
of that
is someday
that you're
going to
stand
maybe near
your parents
before the
Lord
and at
that point
your identity
is not going
to be as
children and
parents
but it's
going to
be as
brothers
and sisters
in Christ
isn't that
amazing
and I think
of that
as parents
you know
we stand
with our
children
and they're
our children
but imagine
standing with
them that
day
and there are
brothers or
fellow brothers
and sisters
in Christ
part of the
body that
have grown up
in the body
of Christ
the new
people of
God
that's the
kind of
vision that
we need to
keep in our
minds
now children
you might ask
this question
this may be
more practical
how long
do I have
to obey
for
what are
the limits
well I think
that's something
that's going
to depend
on culture
and context
in Ireland
18
21
legally it's
18
so when you're
18
parents can
kick you out
your parents
are legally
responsible for
you and you
live under
their rule
at least
until 18
and even
after that
time as I
said you
may remain
dependent on
your parents
so as you
go through
college
or maybe
you're just
trying to
start to
find your
feet after
school and
work and
you're still
living at
home things
like that
so it's
open and
I think you
need wisdom
as to how
you obey
and particularly
after 18
but and this
is partly
directed towards
parents there
should be an
increasing sense
of freedom
as you grow
up okay
parents we need
to be aware
of that
they're not
for under
14 okay
but the
basic call
on your
life as a
believer in
the church as
a child who
believes towards
your parents
is to obey
them okay
I'm not going to
fudge that or
ignore that that's
that's what the
word says to you
this morning
but you are
equal with your
parents in
Christ and you
are equal in
the church yet
God in his
wisdom has
your parents
in a role
of authority
that provides
protection
provides comfort
and provides
nurture for
you that is
why Paul also
says that you're
to honor your
parents and
that is something
that stretches
beyond 18
there's I don't
think there's an
end in sight
there in doing
so he says that
it will go well
with you and
you may enjoy
long life on
the earth and
there's a there's
a general promise
there and I
think an indication
that it's right
for children to
honor their
parents for a
long time and
that that has a
benefit to those
children to those
parents and I
believe society as
a whole one of
the signs of the
end times Paul
says is that
children will
reject their
parents and not
be under their
authority and
that's a sign of
things collapsing
and being wrong
so I think there
is a benefit to
children to
parents and to
society as a
whole to see
children honor
their parents
throughout their
lives
now to
parents
first for
children
I'm off the
hook now
you can relax
to parents and
especially fathers
now it does say
fathers but I
don't think it
excludes mothers
there's some
argument that the
word fathers here
functions similarly
to brothers in
the Bible
sometimes you see
brothers and
actually means
brothers and
sisters so this
is this I think
can be more
generally addressed
to parents but
especially fathers
and I think
that's fair
firstly what it
doesn't say it
doesn't say that
you are to assert
your authority over
your children and
make sure that they
obey you I've
looked I can't
find it in these
verses the command
is to children to
obey not fathers
to make them and
this is the same
idea throughout this
section for wives
and husbands and
for slaves and
masters those that
are in the position
and I use this
word carefully and
don't misunderstand
me those in the
position of submission
to good authority
are commanded to
live under that
authority but
husbands are not
commanded to lord it
over their wives
parents are not
told to rule over
their children and
masters are not
told to dominate
their slaves it's
quite the opposite
in all three cases
the exercise of
authority is to
serve and to love
and to care and to
nurture there's no
sense in any of
this wives and
husbands children
and parents slaves
and masters of
of domination and
forcing your will
upon another so
fathers what does
it say if that's
not what it's not
what it doesn't say
what does it say
well I think
possibly the wisest
few words that
could be written on
this subject fathers
do not exasperate
your children do
not exasperate do
not embitter your
children I hope you
have a sense of what
that means in
exasperation and
bitter in all your
dealings with them
when they push you
right to the edge to
anger when they
disappoint you when
they when they hurt
you and when when
things flare up you're
not to respond with
bitterness and
impatience you're not
to make their hearts
hard are your
children displaying a
hard heart that
that could be down to
you in which case
you're failing to
heed the word of
God you're failing to
heed the wisdom that
is here you want to
discipline your
children and that is
good and it's loving
to care for your
children in that way
to discipline them
but how can you
demonstrate discipline
to your son or
daughter daughter when
you lose the plot
when you fly off the
handle at the very
moment that you say
that you were doing
it for their
discipline have you
thought about that
that's that's hard
stop think pray breathe
does your child really
need to be shouted at
because they spilt that
drink even if 30
seconds ago you told
them just just just
push it in a bit from
the edge of the table
love and then it
spills and and you
know the reaction are
you showing any level
of discipline yourself
when you let loose
with that barrage of
shouts and commands
and I lay bare like
this for my own sake
this morning I am often
harsh and often hard
with my own three
precious children oh
lord forgive me if I
if I should ever embitter
my children fathers and
mothers do not
exasperate your
children for their
hard hearts will will
start to turn away from
you as a parent and
even turn away from the
lord they might do
their duty till they're
18 they might stick
stick until then but
believe me if you have
embittered their hearts
then they will be gone in
an instant and it may be
the hardest thing in the
world to mend that
bridge that has been
destroyed over years of
harshness but there is
hope even if you are in
that situation today thank
god that even in our
failures that he is the
god of the impossible
because it's about new
birth which is something
that the lord does the
lord does in people's
hearts so how then should
you parent do not
exasperate your children
instead bring them up in
the training and
instruction of the lord
you do it with the same
love and grace that the
lord has shown you as he
has brought you into
fellowship with jesus and
with his church you are to
to be a demonstration of
the fruit of the spirit and
that fruit that comes from
growing together with other
believers in the church in
community
teach your children by your
words teach your children by
your deeds what it means to
be a follower of jesus and a
faithful part of a church
community it's tender tender
training and instruction
that's called to here and as
your children begin to follow
jesus help them to see that
their sin goes right down deep
into their hearts we want to
correct the behavior and that
is that is right to correct the
behavior but as they grow show
them the depth of their sin you
see jesus has caused them if
they are believers to be born
anew and they can become more
like jesus every day they can
deal with the issue of sin in
their hearts and god willing
with her helpless parents and if
your children don't follow jesus
pray on your knees for them that
the lord would save and keep them
and if they continue not to follow
through those early years i think
we need to try and hold these
verses and ensure that when they
hit 18 that they're not embittered
they're not bitter towards us and
bitter towards the lord but that
they will keep honoring their
mother and father because they've
seen gentleness and they've seen
sacrifice each each and every day
it's hard we can't change our
children that's ultimately the
lord's work but but we can seek to
raise them so that past 18 they we
have a relationship with them that
they're not so hardened i'm conscious
reading a section like this it kind
of maybe portrays a particular ideal
family you know mom dad children in
the church isn't that wonderful and
that's that's often not the case in
church life i know for for many
people here it's not that simple and
not that straightforward and there are
lots of things to think about and
applications and i can't cover them
all this morning i wish i could but
there's one that i do want to come
back to um in relation to children
what if my parents don't believe and
that's that situation i i found myself
in growing up through the life of the
church here and i know some people are
in that situation say if my parents
don't believe do i still need to obey
what are the limits of that obedience
if they tell me that i can't be
baptized as a believer they say you
can't go to church even can i disobey in
those cases well i think obedience to
parents even those that don't believe
even if your parents don't believe that
your obedience as a believer it is the
right thing to do the end of verse one as
we said for this is right it almost in a
sense apart from our identity in christ
it's just true in in the whole of
creation so it should be the rare
exception to disobey that's what i'm
ultimately saying it should be a rare
thing of course jesus taught us didn't
he that our our ultimate loyalty is to
the kingdom of god and that there are
times where we'll be in conflict with
family and parents so if your parents
forbid you from following jesus in your
heart and confessing jesus christ as
lord and savior then yes yes at that
point you you must disobey and you must
proclaim that you follow jesus but
baptism can wait until you're 18 being
able to take part fully in the life of
the church it might just need to take
more time to develop over a longer
period the lord knows your heart keep
your respect for your parents and show
them obedience and honesty as a forgiven
sinner the lord sees your struggle the
lord sees your struggle and more than
that he knew jesus knew what it was like
to be on this earth and at different
times to be estranged from his own mother
and brothers and family jesus knew that he
experienced that that tension between the
call of god and the kingdom of god and
the call of family and the kind of
pressures he was under in his society so
so so the lord knows the lord sees but i
believe the lord still calls us to obey
with those rare and few exceptions so just
to conclude let us let us all welcome our
believing children as part of the church let
us together disciple and encourage them as
people who who know the lord and love the
lord and for those children sit among us
that haven't yet expressed faith to see
them as people in need to see and hear the
gospel each and every week so that one day
those children as well may join us together
in the great multitude of forgiven sinners that
will worship the lamb let's pray for that right
now our father we we we we confess that our
our view of of you our view of the bible is
so low at times our vision is so dull and
lord jesus i just want to thank you for the
church and for the greatness of the church
your your great plan of redemption through your
body the church that there's no one word that
can describe it we we thank you that that we can
grow together as believers into the body of christ and be
this new people of god and i thank you that our
children the children in the church are as equal members of
that as as anyone else and father i pray for my own
children as they grow as they express faith in
different ways that i would continue i pray for
for for the other children in the church for the parents here who have children
who are maybe older who have who have left that that don't follow christ now
lord jesus in your great mercy grant them repentance and salvation that they
would they would bow their knee
and that they would remember the gospel that they have heard through many years
and come back and confess and come to you and father there is no greater desire for a parent and then to want
to stand with their children on that day before you as brothers and sisters in the lord
worshiping together and lord in your mercy be gracious make that real in the life of this church for the
children who are with us now and for those that have that have gone on lord that that don't follow you today
lord be merciful for your glory in jesus name amen amen