Okay, folks, well, it's lovely to see you today. How are we all doing? Okay. If you have a Bible, come with me to Matthew chapter 5.
We've only got two verses this morning, 31 and 32, but so big was the topic, we felt it'd be great to devote a whole sermon just to these two verses.
So Matthew chapter 5, 31 and 32. You can use the Pew Bibles or you can scroll on your phone or hopefully you brought your own Bible as well this morning.
If you don't have a Bible, we've got plenty of those at the back. That's our gift to you. You can take it when you head this morning.
But whatever we need to do to get God's word open in front of us, please let me encourage you to do it.
So we're going to read this in about 10 minutes time, but let me just try and get us into what's going on in these couple of verses.
There was a song that I was singing in the kitchen recently.
And here's the chorus. See if you recognize it. I'm not going to attempt to sing it.
Go easy on me, baby. I was still a child.
Didn't get the chance to feel the world around me.
I had no time to choose.
What I choose, what I chose to do, so
go easy on me.
Anyone recognize the lyrics from Adele?
Yeah.
So one of my favorite songs from that album, actually one of her best-selling albums of her career, really.
But if you know the backstory to that song,
it's her explaining to her son
why she ended her marriage with his dad.
A marriage where she said in an interview with Vogue magazine that she was just going through the motions
and she wasn't feeling it anymore.
That was her precise line to this interview with Vogue magazine.
And I say it because Adele's story,
in a sense I kind of feel sorry for her because she's had to kind of live that in the public eye.
But her story is so illustrative of the massive shift that's happening right now in our culture.
And statistics would tell us this,
about how our society views this whole concept of marriage and divorce.
So let me try this on with you for size and see if it connects in terms of the generations.
A generation above mine and a few above mine,
not without their faults when it came to marriage,
we'd have talked along the lines of the primary thing being all about faithfulness.
Skip to my generation and a few generations below mine,
or one generation below mine.
We are certainly not without our faults when we talk about marriage and divorce.
But we talk a lot more along the lines of fulfillment, don't we?
It's kind of what people long for these days, fulfillment.
Ours is an age of no-fault divorce.
If you remember that phrase that Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow coined just a few years ago,
what was their phrase to describe their divorce?
It was a conscious uncoupling.
So this is the air that we breathe today, living in Scotland in the year 2026.
Now here's the point.
As you think about that trajectory,
In our world today, when it comes to how marriage is viewed and looked upon,
is the trajectory, is it higher or is it lower?
I think it's lower, isn't it?
It's lower.
It's so important to think about that when it comes to what Jesus is going to tell us to do as his people
in his word this morning.
I always love how John Stott, the late John Stott, described the church as it lives in culture.
He always had this lovely phrase where he said,
just remember it's a lot like fish.
It's only dead ones that go with the flow.
And that's exactly what we're going to hear Jesus call all of us here today as one church family,
as his people living in this city, regardless of what your relationship status is.
When it comes to God's wonderful intention for this one man, one woman, for life thing
that we read about in the Bible called marriage,
in a society that's going lower,
Jesus is calling us to go higher.
Now we've only got two verses today,
which we're just going to read in a few moments time.
We're going to get to grips with what Jesus is saying in its context about divorce.
And then because this affects all of us,
every single one of us in one way or another,
I'm just going to try and apply this pastorally in three ways.
So hang on for that right at the end.
But here's the thing I've been wrestling with all week.
In fact, I've known this is coming up for about two months now.
Here's what I've been wrestling with.
Why not just skip it?
Or why not just couch it in amongst kind of four other commands
and we'll kind of just give this five minutes and skip on.
Can I just tell you two convictions that drive me why we don't skip this?
Number one is a conviction about the Bible.
That all of this, all of scripture is God breathed, right?
We're a church that loves its 316s.
We love John 316, for God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son,
that whoever believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.
We're also a church that loves 2 Timothy 316,
that all scripture is God breathed and is useful.
And so that's why we go towards this.
Every single verse in our Bibles is there because God wanted it to be there.
And the second conviction is just an experiential one.
Having done this gig now for, well, we've been at Brunsford this summer for 14 years.
The amount of people that sat in these pews during that time.
But here's the conviction.
It's an experience.
Having walked with people these number of years,
that God does the deepest work in our hearts
when we go towards the hardest parts of his word.
I was thinking of my mom when we were young.
She used to make us every morning as kids take cod liver oil tablets.
Every single one of those three words is terrifying, isn't it?
Cod liver oil tablets.
Four words.
But here's the thing.
It tasted disgusting.
It was really hard.
But it was so good for me.
And I pray, friends, that whatever's going on in your life today,
this would be that in your life and in my life.
Because just in case you're thinking of checking out at this point,
notwithstanding the punch of this,
and I won't hold this back,
it's good news for us that Jesus speaks into this today.
Really good news.
And this could well be.
It's not like we preach on this every week.
This is why we go through the Bible.
These things come up.
This could be just the light into your darkness that you need this morning.
Here's the question I want you to have in your mind as we journey through this today.
We're going to come back to it right at the end.
Why does Jesus care so much?
Will we read it together?
It's on the screen.
Here we go.
It has been said,
Remember this is Jesus talking,
Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.
But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife except for sexual immorality makes her the victim of adultery.
And anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
Let me pray.
Lord, we pray that you would just be with us this morning.
Lord, I'm so aware of my inadequacy.
Lord, I pray that your spirit, where all of our hope is,
your spirit would take your words and implant it and apply it deep into our lives.
May we leave here with a bigger view and love for Jesus, we pray in his name.
Amen.
So we're in the Sermon on the Mount.
Let's get, we run up to this in the Sermon on the Mount.
Remember, Jesus is speaking primarily to his disciples about what life inside the kingdom of God looks like.
Remember, this is not an ethical lecture.
This is what the spirit of God does in a human heart when the king moves in.
This is what life inside the kingdom looks like.
And in this sermon, he's doing two things.
This is really important for where we're going.
Number one, he's challenging the Pharisees and the teachers of the law who are in the background.
Who are sticklers for keeping the letter of the law, but totally missing the heart of the law.
And two, Jesus is bringing out the true meaning of the law.
Now, this is how I've, as a journey with this Sermon on the Mount,
we kind of plan these things six months in advance.
This is kind of where my thinking has got to.
What is Jesus doing here?
You know, my favorite news story from a couple of years ago.
Do you remember this one?
Yeah?
Is it, I can't pronounce this, Eke Mono?
Was that the painting that was in a really bad way?
And this 80-year-old woman, I wrote her name down, Cecilia Jimenez.
She volunteered to try and restore it.
And she came up with a picture on the right.
Remember this?
Well, this is kind of what is going on with the Sermon on the Mount.
You can imagine people around in Jesus' day.
They're looking to the teachers of the law and asking this question.
Can you help us see the beauty of the law?
Can you help us understand the true meaning of the law so that we can try and live in light of it
as we worship the God whose word and instruction this is?
Can you help us?
And the Pharisees are holding up a completely distorted view of the law.
And Jesus, if you like, in the Sermon on the Mount has come to restore and show us the original.
Right?
This is what's kind of going on here.
And that's what Jesus is doing at verse 31.
Have a look at it there.
Jesus is quoting them, quoting Moses in Deuteronomy 24.
Do you see it?
He's quoting them, quoting Moses in Deuteronomy 24.
Now, it's going to go on the screen in a minute, so don't worry too much about turning there.
But this is what you read when you turn there.
Just read it to us, right?
If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him, we'll come back to this in a minute,
because he finds something indecent about her and he writes her a certificate of divorce,
gives it to her and sends her from his house.
And if after she leaves his house, she becomes the wife of another man.
And her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce,
gives it to her and sends her from his house.
Or if he dies, then the first husband who divorced her is not allowed to marry her again
after she has been defiled.
That would be detestable in the eyes of the Lord.
Now, work with me here.
According to Jesus, the Pharisees' interpretation of that law is miles off it.
Firstly, because they're failing to teach that divorce is only a thing
because of the hardness of the human heart.
God gave these measures to his people as a damage limitation exercise,
not an excuse for change.
Park that thought, we'll come back to it.
But secondly, because they've ripped that quote massively out of context.
So do you see the certificate of divorce language there?
This is where they've got it from.
It was there to do two things.
Firstly, it was there to stop the man initiating a really hasty divorce.
You can understand that one.
But two, this is what you might not have thought about.
It is there to protect the woman.
Now, remember, Jesus is walking and talking not in a 21st century context.
He's walking and talking in a 1st century culture.
One where so often a woman would be completely dependent on a man for her livelihood.
So just remember that.
So this law was actually in place to stop the scenario
whereby a man divorced his wife, sent her away,
and then at a later date decides to try and get her back
and treat her a bit like property.
So the certificate of divorce, if you can appreciate this,
what this is doing is it's bringing a sense of closure to this whole thing.
Do you see it?
Bringing that sense of closure.
Everybody knows where we stand.
But in Jesus' day, this certificate of divorce
divorce is being treated a bit like a monopoly get-out-of-jail-free card
for any unhappy husband to play,
and he's got rid of his wife.
So see that?
This is how this works.
Okay, I was a lawyer.
I totally remember how this works.
This works when you had a contract.
You would define your terms before you got into the contract, right?
You can talk to me about that afterwards if you want.
This is how the game plays.
These guys are doing the same thing.
See that word displeasing.
The Pharisees and the teachers of the law had taken it,
and they'd gone concertina on it, right?
What they'd done is they'd taken it and just totally broadened it out.
So they were making it broad.
In fact, they were making it so broad that even if,
to give you an example, a wife burnt the cooking one evening,
that fell within the scope of displeasing.
No joke.
So the Pharisees and the teachers of the law
weren't honoring the Lord at all as they taught this.
All they were doing, in fact,
was facilitating an easy divorce culture
and leading people straight into sin.
So do you see how our generation, our culture,
is not the only one to have a pretty low view of marriage.
It's exactly the same one here.
You with me?
So that's precisely what Jesus is challenging
if we go back to Matthew at verse 32.
What is he saying here?
I think he's saying two things.
The first big thing is that whilst divorce isn't always necessary,
now hear my words here, okay?
It isn't always necessary.
And reconciliation is always something that we're encouraged to pursue.
There are sadly, regrettably occasions when it is permissible.
And specifically here he mentions sexual immorality.
We're just going to define that as having sex with someone
when you're married to someone else
as being one of those things.
And it's worth saying that that's not all the Bible has to say
about valid grounds for divorce.
I think you could add, and you can talk to me about this afterwards if you want,
come back this evening.
There'll be more space to talk and pray about this kind of stuff.
Desertion and abuse.
And hear me say that when it is valid divorce,
then remarriage is valid too.
And if you're thinking, I'd love to think a bit more about that.
There's a QR code, or you can just Google it,
a Kevin DeYoung article in the Gospel Coalition called Divorce and Remarriage.
One of the best things I've read on it.
We'll take you 20 minutes to read it.
I think it's really, really helpful for teasing this out.
We don't have the time this morning, but that article is top-notch.
But here's the thing.
When it comes to divorce, according to Jesus,
that list is not long.
It's not long.
And it's a serious and a hugely traumatic thing
for everyone involved when it happens.
Here's the second big thing I think Jesus is saying there.
Don't mistake the provision that God makes for a sinful world
with God being okay with the sin.
Say that again.
Don't mistake the provision that God makes for a sinful world
with God being okay with the sin.
They are quick to promote the issuing of certificate of divorces,
flying around like confetti.
But Jesus is saying to them,
bear in mind that at the end of the day
is just a bit of paper.
And just because a man has issued one
doesn't necessarily end the marriage
in the sight of an all-seeing,
won't be mocked,
cares deeply about how we treat one another,
holy God.
Because remember that livelihood culture?
Come back with me there.
The livelihood culture.
When a woman is divorced,
she is almost, as it were,
forced into the arms of another man
for her livelihood.
And in the scenario where her previous divorce
from her husband wasn't legit,
not only is she led straight into committing adultery,
but the man that she goes to
is also led into committing adultery.
And see this whole sin and shame
and guilt and remorse and hurt cycle,
it just balloons.
It's like a vortex.
It just continues to bring in people
and the mess gets deeper
and more complicated.
But see, when you think about that,
who is the one who suffers the most
emotionally, spiritually,
maybe even physically
in this whole rinse and repeat project
that the Pharisees and the teachers of the law
are promoting?
Who suffers the most?
It's the woman.
Isn't it?
Who has all the cards here?
It's not her in this context.
If you know your Bibles,
fly a kite here and see if it connects.
Friends, could it be,
if you know your Bibles,
could it be that that is something
of the life story
of the Samaritan woman
that Jesus encounters in John chapter 4?
Because we read about her
and we automatically assume
because we've grown up with Sex and the City
and Friends and all those sitcoms,
we automatically assume
because we view her
through 21st century lenses
that when Jesus says,
you have had five husbands
and the man that you're now with
is not your husband,
we assume, if you like,
she's played away five times.
Yeah?
Now, John doesn't tell us in the text,
so don't hear me wrong.
We can't be sure of her backstory.
And no doubt, listen,
she'll have made tons of mistakes in her life.
But there is,
with this in mind,
the distinct possibility
that she's been issued
with a certificate of divorce
by an unhappy husband
who's found her displeasing
five times.
And the man that she's now with
wants nothing to do
with the marriage thing
because there's such a stigma
around her.
And we don't have time
to see the fact
that she's had five husbands,
there's a man on the scene,
five plus one,
that makes Jesus
the seventh man on the scene,
the perfect man.
I'd love to go there,
but we just don't have time.
But here's the thing.
What does Jesus say to her?
He says,
I've come for you.
What does he say to her?
Samaria's lowest outcast.
He says,
I've come to offer you
living water.
And dear friend,
if that is you today,
if you think you have no idea
the darkness of the situation
that I am in,
know that we have a God
and a Savior
who specializes
in bringing light
into the darkest
and the most horrific
of situations.
But see,
when you zoom out a little,
do you see what's going on
in this context?
When it comes to divorce,
the Pharisees,
what game are they playing?
Again,
I was a lawyer.
Know how this works.
Your job is to what?
Find loopholes.
That's the game
they're playing
with the certificate
of divorce stuff.
They're just trying
to find loopholes.
And in so doing,
they're leading people
towards not a higher view
of it,
but a lower view
of marriage.
But Jesus comes
on the scene
and he wants to talk
about the sanctity
of marriage.
And he's calling
his people
not to swallow
a lower view of it,
but to hold his hand,
trust him,
run to him for healing
and adopt
a higher view of it.
And so here's
what I want to do
in the time we have
remaining.
In a room this size,
and I recognize
there's a ton of people
watching this online
and there are people
who are not here
this morning
who will also be
affected by this.
In a room of this size,
we're in different
seasons of our lives
and this will land
in all sorts of
different places
in our lives.
Can I just try
and apply this
pastorally?
Because I wonder
if one of these
three phrases
as you encounter
this this morning
comes to your mind.
Just praying for you
all this week,
praying for all of us
this week,
and these are just
the three things
that I felt God
lay on my heart.
Here's number one.
And number one
is a lot longer
than two of the three,
so just bear with me.
Okay, here's number one.
Maybe you're thinking this.
I'm right in the thick of it.
Speaking to those of us,
let me just play this out.
Speaking to those of us
who are married,
some of us will be here.
I know some of you
have just got married,
right?
Some of us will be here
and we would describe
ourselves as being
happily married.
And if that's you,
friend,
I want you to see
that you give God
all the praise for that.
All the praise
for his kindness
and goodness.
It's why we started
our service
by singing about
the goodness of God.
Okay,
we give him
all the praise for that.
And let me encourage you
to keep investing
in the health
of your marriage.
Some of you
are really early years
and you need to put
the foundations
in your marriage
at this stage
because you will reap
the benefit down the line.
If you are happily married,
praise God for that.
And yet for others of us,
you might hear me
talk about this
this morning
and you think to yourself,
I'm not happily married.
I'm actually
unhappily married.
And even maybe
you're slowly beginning
to entertain the thought,
maybe,
just maybe,
change
is exactly
what I need.
Maybe your thoughts
have begun
to wonder.
Maybe there's someone
at the office
who you're beginning
to look upon
in a different light.
Can I just say
as your pastor,
deep breath,
gently yet clearly,
kill it.
Because if you don't
kill it,
it will kill you.
Do not let
discontentment
be the torpedo
in your marriage.
Kill it.
The devil is the
absolute master
of the bait and switch.
Promises you
everything
and will take
from you
everything.
He is the
master of
whispering
into our hearts
that red flags
are in fact
harmless bunting.
And friend,
if you are there
today,
can I plead
with you?
Kill it.
It is not
harmless,
it is serious
in the eyes
of a holy God.
discontentment.
And maybe this
morning you need
to wake up to
two things
about discontentment.
One is a
good thing.
Okay?
Maybe you need
to know in your
discontentment
that this is just
a season of your
life.
Don't let it
question whether
you're in the
right marriage.
Maybe it's just
a season
of your life.
Listen,
I have been there,
a really busy
season at work,
a run of night
shifts,
middle of exam
season.
Maybe you're
looking after
family members
that's taking
its toll on you.
Maybe you're
looking after
young children
and you cannot
get baby brain
out of your
head.
Can I just
say to you,
if you're in
that period
of life,
it will pass.
Do not let
it cause you
to doubt
whether you're
in the right
marriage or not.
Come up for
air.
It's okay
to struggle
in these
seasons,
but it will
pass.
But maybe
that discontentment,
here's the second
thing,
you need to
think about
perhaps the
things that
are feeding
that sense
of discontentment.
Friends,
have an honest
thing to
yourself.
What programs
are you
watching?
What books
are you
reading?
Whose pictures
are you looking
at on social
media and
think,
actually,
I deserve
a bit of
that.
Why am I
not having
the Kodak
moments?
Why are we
not going to
Disneyland with
the kids
and getting
the selfies?
Why is my
experience of
this different
to the one
I'm seeing
in social
media?
We know
social media
enough to
know that
it's one
side of
the story.
You pop
the bonnet
of those
pictures and
it would
tell a very
different thing.
Don't be
duped into
that.
Think about
the things
that are
feeding your
discontentment
and distracting
you from
Christ.
All those
are just
petri dishes
that are
the perfect
breeding ground
for the
bacteria of
discontentment
to grow.
So maybe
think about
that today.
What is
feeding that
sense of
discontentment?
Maybe today
you need to
take the
action of
just turning
back to
the Lord
and turning
back to
your spouse.
Maybe going
away for the
weekend is
exactly the
thing that you
need to do.
However,
that said,
all of that,
if you
hear me
and you
think to
yourself,
it's more
than that,
can I
encourage you
to talk
about it?
I always
love what
C.S.
Lewis said
about
friendship,
and I think
this is
great.
Friendship is
born at the
moment when
one person
says to
another,
what,
you two?
I thought
I was the
only one.
If that's you
here today,
can I
encourage you
to seek
out another
person?
Just be
honest with
them.
We're here
to help,
not to judge,
not to comment,
we're here to
listen,
I don't know
what a good
friend does.
Maybe even
seek out
another couple
in this
church who
you can be
really honest
with.
So there's
words here
for you if
you're married,
there are
also words
here for
you if
you're not
married.
Can I
just say
don't buy
the lie
that somehow
getting married
is going to
solve all
your problems.
speaking as
one who
is happily
married,
love being
married,
but let's
be honest,
I'm punching
well above
my weight.
Do you know,
I remember
when I got
married just
discovering a
whole host
of different
problems in
my life that
I didn't even
know were
there.
90% were
all about
me and
my stubborn
heart.
Don't think
that marriage
is going to
solve all
your problems,
but I want
you to
appreciate that
you've got
such a stake
in the
married people
in this
church,
their marriage
is continuing
to flourish.
Could you
offer to
babysit one
night?
There's so
many people
here that
babysit for
us to let
us go out.
It's gold
for us.
Could you
offer to
babysit for
somebody?
How can you
go up to
someone today
who is
married and
ask them
how you
can pray
for them?
Those of
us who
are married,
can I just
say this is
not an
excuse as
important as
family time
is?
This is not
an excuse
just to
close our
doors.
Can I
encourage us
who have
been blessed
with families
open our
doors,
let people
in because
we are one
church family
here today
regardless of
our relationship
status.
Maybe that's
exactly where
you are.
I'm right in
the thick of
it.
Can I just
say God
in his
mercy has
words for
you here.
Here's the
other two
and these
are much
quicker.
Maybe you're
thinking to
yourself right
now, I've
been really
hurt by it.
maybe you've
watched this
happen to
someone you
know from
afar.
Maybe this
has happened
to you and
your family.
Maybe this
has even
happened to
you personally.
And I'm
so deeply
sorry that
that has
been your
experience.
Know that
God has
not missed
any of
it.
He knows
every tear,
he sees
every prayer,
nothing has
escaped his
gaze.
But can I
encourage you
to speak up
this morning,
particularly if
you're struggling
silently and
particularly if
that issue is
abuse.
Make no
mistake that we
want our
church culture
to be a
safe place for
sinners, but
we don't want
it to be a
safe place for
sin.
If that is
you, you
need to speak
up.
Again, seek
someone out,
find a friend,
but particularly
if that is
abuse, come
and speak to
the elders.
But the
other person I
thought of in
my mind this
week is maybe
you've given
up on the
whole thing
because you've
been so hurt
by it.
You've given
up on the
whole thing.
It's not for
me.
I'm not doing
it.
I want to
pick another
option.
My prayer for
you this week
has been,
you know,
we've had a
humble brag
here.
I took down a
tree this week
in our garden.
I remember
getting up the
next morning and
looking out and
seeing the sun
shining on
this area of
our garden
where it
never shone
before.
And where
the bits of
our garden
where I'm
thinking in
my head
thinking they've
just never
seen light.
And my
prayer for you
in your
darkest moments
is that you
would see the
light shining
into that
problem.
And I want
you to hang
on for two
minutes to see
why this
means so much
to Jesus.
because as
we gaze at
him we've
got to see
that he is
one who
specializes
in going
towards people.
He's the
one who
specializes
in grace,
new
tomorrows
and in
healing.
You know
when Alex
and I
have had a
really rough
day as
parents we
sit in bed
at night.
Often she's
lifting me
off the floor
or I'm
lifting her
off the
floor.
And we
always say
this thing
to each
other.
Tomorrow
is a new
day.
Got it
wrong as a
parent.
Tomorrow is
a new
day.
His
mercies
are fresh
to us.
But here's
the third
phrase.
Maybe you're
thinking to
yourself,
I'm not in
the thick
of it.
I'm not
hugely hurt
by it.
But you
know what?
I've made
a real
mess of
it.
And I
don't know
friends,
maybe you
have.
Maybe you
know that
you have.
Can I
just say
that Jesus
is wooing
you here
towards
repentance?
And maybe
this slices
two ways.
Number one,
maybe you
have never
acted on
it.
Maybe
you've
never
fessed
up.
The
challenge
here from
Jesus is
for you
to think
about what
are some
of the
really hard
conversations
that you
maybe need
to have?
What do
you need
to hold
your hands
up for
and say
I've
massively
got it
wrong?
Who do
you need
to seek
out for
forgiveness
and being
able to
start a
conversation?
What is
it that you
maybe this
morning are
being called
to turn
and first
and foremost
before the
Lord?
Confess.
But here's
the other
angle on
this slice.
Maybe you
think actually
the last
place I
feel like I
can go
is to
God.
Maybe
shame is
the thing
that is
keeping you
from running
to the cross
of Jesus
for forgiveness.
You think
I've messed
it up so
bad.
You have
no idea.
I've messed
it up so
bad.
Surely
this time
I've gone
too far.
And friends
I beg of
you to
look at
Jesus on
the cross
and see
that you
cannot
out sin
the cross.
And if
you think
you can
Jesus would
say try
me.
Run there
for forgiveness.
Run there
for restoration.
Run there
for redemption.
You cannot
out sin
the cross.
Are you
doing okay?
Right.
Coming into
land.
Just as I
close.
And if
you've lost
me over
the last
20 minutes
this has
been too
hard.
I want
you to
come back
in for
the last
two minutes.
Okay.
Just as we
close 17
years ago
I was an
usher at
a friend's
wedding in
Vancouver,
Canada.
Check that
out.
A place
called
Thetis
Island.
I was
one of
its best
men.
To this
day the
most stunning
wedding
backdrop
I have
ever seen.
The weather
was everything
you'd expect.
Everyone was
looking fabulous.
Canadians were
dazzled by the
fact that we
were in
kilts.
And there
wasn't a
dry eye in
the house
as the
couple made
their vows
to one
another.
But the
pastor stood
up to speak
and he
started with
this line.
He said
Dave and
Amanda as
you set out
on your
married life
today I
want you to
know at
the start
that there
are two
things wrong
with this
marriage.
And he
pointed to
them both
and he
went you
and you.
And we
all had a
laugh because
he kind of
killed the
Disney-esque
moment that
we were in.
But he
did it out
of a
pastoral
love for
those two.
As if to
say here
is what
your married
life will
be like.
Don't let
this decorated
doorway of a
day lull
you into
thinking that
married life is
going to
be this
constant
stream of
bliss and
happiness.
Slow
dancing in
the kitchen
to Michael
Buble.
Roses
arriving every
day from
Interflora.
Valentine's
Day becoming
the new
groundhog day.
Don't buy
it.
But here's
what he also
went on to
say.
Do you know
the only way
this is going
to work and
flourish?
Is if you
keep remembering
what this is
pointing you
to.
And here's
where we
end.
Back to that
question at
the top.
Why does
Jesus care
so much?
And the
reason he
cares so
much is
because marriage
is baked
into the
very purposes
of God.
In Genesis
1 and
Genesis 2
God creates
Adam and
Eve and his
intention is
for them to
become one
flesh.
We've got to
see in the
Bible story
that is
before Genesis
3.
You can do
the maths.
Right?
Before Genesis
3.
So it is
baked into
God's good
design for
creation.
Why has
he done
it?
The answer
the Apostle
Paul gives
in Ephesians
5 is that
so that in
the generations
to come we
would understand
why Jesus
came.
That we'd
understand why
he went to
the cross.
We'd
understand why
he shed
his blood.
We'd
understand where
all history
is going.
Now listen,
in the church
I think over
the last 10
years we've
made much of
the fact that
Jesus was a
single man.
And that is
absolutely right.
And I think
that he is the
stone in the
shoe to the
sexual revolution
that's going on
today that says
you have to
find someone to
be contented.
You have to
find someone to
do life with.
And Jesus
says no.
God,
that is what
life is all
about.
We've rightly
made much of
that.
But on the
other side,
it is also
absolutely true
to say that
Jesus is a
deeply,
holy,
fully
betrothed
man.
and the
apple of
his eye
is his
blood-bought
church.
And we
fail
and we
stumble
and it
feels at
times like
we barely
put one
step
ahead of
another in
this journey
of faith.
We're barely
keeping going.
It feels like
each day is
harder.
than the
rest.
And of
course,
it's true in
the Bible
story that
his people
have given
him every
single reason
for God
to issue
us the
certificate of
divorce.
And yet
Christ goes
to that
cross to
win his
bride.
And if
your faith
is in
him today,
he goes
to the
cross for
you.
We are
unfaithful,
but he is
faithful.
And one
day soon,
he will
come for
his bride.
And do
you know
what?
Our
groom is
going
nowhere.
What do I
pray?
And let's
just be
quiet before
the Lord.
And friends,
just bring
your own
prayers and
your thoughts
before him
this morning,
wherever this
has fallen
on you.
the Samaritan
woman said
to him,
you're a
Jew and
I am a
Samaritan
woman.
How can
you ask
me for
a drink?
For
Jews do
not
associate
with
Samaritans.
Jesus
answered
her,
if you
knew the
gift of
God,
and who
is it
that asks
you for
a drink?
You would
have asked
him and
he would
have given
you living
water.
And so
Lord, I
just thank
you for
Jesus.
Father,
thank you
that whatever
is going
on in
our lives
today,
all maybe
the hurt
or the
regrets or
maybe the
worries or
the people
that are on
our minds
right now,
we bring
them to
you.
Thank you
that nothing
takes you
by surprise.
And thank
you in
Jesus,
we have
one who
comes to
us,
offering us
grace and
truth.
So may
we leave
here today
not with
a sense
of our
guilt,
but with
a lifting
our eyes
to the
greatness of
his grace.
So Father,
be with us
as we finish
our time
this morning.
Would you
be in our
conversations
afterwards?
Lord,
would you
help us
to respond
in ways
this morning
that glorify
you and
are for
our good?
And we
pray all of
these things
in Jesus'
name.
Amen.