WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 Okay, so as I was saying before, we're doing these Old Testament stories. 00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:10.000 Now, I have a confession to make, and the confession is that I changed this week's story. 00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:16.000 Now, as a hyper-spiritual individual, I would say I was led by the Spirit to do so, 00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 and I hope that's the case. I wouldn't make such a great claim. 00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:27.000 But I just felt there was a need for a slight change of pace. 00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:33.000 The stories we've done have been fantastic, but there's been an intensity about them, 00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:38.000 and I assume this at one level, which is absolutely good because it's the themes that God wants us to have. 00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:44.000 But it was supposed to be this week, it was supposed to be David and Absalom. 00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 But we'll do that again. We'll do it at some other time. 00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:51.000 But today, we're going to do David and Jonathan. 00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:54.000 A slight change of pace and a slight change of theme. 00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 Because I wonder today, if you're in the position where you just crave, you know, 00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.000 you just sometimes crave a friend. 00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:09.000 You know, someone who understands you, someone who just accepts you, loves you for who you are, 00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:13.000 faults and all, someone that you can relax with. 00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:19.000 Do you ever come to God's house and you're just tired, and you're just tired of bitterness 00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:23.000 and a bad atmosphere and opposition? I don't mean in church. 00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:28.000 I mean generally in your life, in your workplace, in your studies, hassles, 00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:33.000 people nagging at you, finding fault with you, complaining about you. 00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:37.000 Isn't it nice just to be in the company of a friend? 00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:41.000 Friendship's a great thing. And it's a massive theme in the Bible. 00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:43.000 Huge theme in God's word. 00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:47.000 And I just want to unpack that a little bit today, generally, 00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:50.000 and then particularly with David and Jonathan. 00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:54.000 The theme of friendship is huge in the Bible. It reflects, it reflects, 00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:58.000 it reflects the very nature of God, okay? Let's start at that level. 00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:04.000 It reflects the very nature of God, because in God there is a Trinitarian friendship. 00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:09.000 He's not a lonely idol, IDLE. 00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:12.000 He's not lonely at that level on his own. 00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:17.000 He is in this great, the purest and best of all friendships. 00:02:17.000 --> 00:02:24.000 There is no mistrust and there is no competitiveness or pride or fallouts 00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:27.000 or jealousy or tensions. 00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:33.000 And I believe in Christ that we will spend eternity exploring the depths of God 00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:36.000 whose persons love each other. 00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:41.000 And we will be enjoying the image of being God's people 00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:47.000 in a righteous community of friendship eternally, 00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:50.000 which will always be growing and developing. 00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:52.000 It reflects the very nature of God. 00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:55.000 It also reflects the fruit of redemption. 00:02:55.000 --> 00:03:01.000 I think of the first text from the screens is, do we have this screen text here? 00:03:01.000 --> 00:03:04.000 Yeah. Okay, from John 15, 13 to 15. 00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:06.000 Greater love is no one than this. 00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:08.000 And you know what you all know this verse. 00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:11.000 It literally lays down his life for his friends. 00:03:11.000 --> 00:03:14.000 You are my friends. Jesus speaks to his disciples. 00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:17.000 If you do what I command you, no longer will I call you servants. 00:03:17.000 --> 00:03:19.000 A servant doesn't know what his master is doing. 00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:23.000 I have called you friends for all that I have heard from my Father, I have made known to you. 00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:30.000 So at the very core of our redemption, Jesus is trumpeting that we become friends with God. 00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:36.000 The language of Scripture is that our sins sets us at enmity with God. 00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:40.000 We are enemies of God naturally, and that's terrifying, even though he still loves us. 00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:44.000 The sun still shines and the rain still falls down on the righteous. 00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:48.000 Without grace, we are enemies at enmity with God, 00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:51.000 terrifying if we understand who God is. 00:03:51.000 --> 00:03:53.000 Terrifying. 00:03:53.000 --> 00:03:55.000 The righteous opponent. 00:03:55.000 --> 00:04:01.000 Not like the human opposition we sometimes face that we can argue against and say it's unjust and unfair. 00:04:01.000 --> 00:04:05.000 But this is the righteous God, and only Christ can reconcile us. 00:04:05.000 --> 00:04:08.000 And he does so, obviously, through the cross. 00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:14.000 And as we recognize and acknowledge our guilt and seek forgiveness, 00:04:14.000 --> 00:04:23.000 it opens up the way to this glorious, completely fresh relationship with God as a friend. 00:04:23.000 --> 00:04:26.000 James 2 and verse 23. 00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:30.000 The Scripture was fulfilled that God sees Abraham, believed God, 00:04:30.000 --> 00:04:33.000 and it was counted to him as righteousness, he was saved by grace. 00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:36.000 And he was called God's friend. 00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:42.000 Or Proverbs 18, verse 24, where we have a man of many companions come to ruin, 00:04:42.000 --> 00:04:44.000 but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. 00:04:44.000 --> 00:04:53.000 So we have the theme that interweaves Scripture, that we recognize that in Christ we have a friend that sticks closer than a brother. 00:04:53.000 --> 00:04:58.000 And that in Christ we can be called rightly God's friend. 00:04:58.000 --> 00:05:00.000 That's a great thing. 00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:01.000 It's a powerful thing. 00:05:01.000 --> 00:05:05.000 It's the living God who calls us into friendship with Him, 00:05:05.000 --> 00:05:15.000 His power and His glory and the author of life, the one who sustains the universe, invites us into friendship with Him. 00:05:15.000 --> 00:05:20.000 I think probably we all like the idea of being friends with someone famous. 00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:26.000 You know, if we could, if we could wangle ourselves into that place where we were friends with someone famous, 00:05:26.000 --> 00:05:30.000 we would be pleased with that, and friends with someone really famous. 00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:34.000 I'm not going to say who it is, because who I think is famous, you might not. 00:05:34.000 --> 00:05:37.000 But you know, that's an important thing. 00:05:37.000 --> 00:05:43.000 But I wonder if we think of a relationship with God like that as Christians. 00:05:43.000 --> 00:05:50.000 There's no one more famous, more glorious, more worship worthy than the living God. 00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:56.000 And that is how He, one of the great descriptions of our relationship with Him in Christ, 00:05:56.000 --> 00:06:00.000 someone that He wants us to spend time with Him too. 00:06:00.000 --> 00:06:03.000 He understands us. He loves us. 00:06:03.000 --> 00:06:10.000 We can be ourselves with Him, or as Corey mentioned, as we confess and recognize who we are before Him. 00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:14.000 He accepts us. He seeks our best. 00:06:14.000 --> 00:06:21.000 His promises are not just sometimes like human promises, even in human friendships, wishful thinking. 00:06:21.000 --> 00:06:28.000 He makes future provision for us, and I wonder, I wonder as you come to church this morning, 00:06:28.000 --> 00:06:37.000 if you've considered or think of beyond theoretical concepts, Jesus is your friend. 00:06:37.000 --> 00:06:42.000 Jesus Christ is your friend. Do you see your relationship of faith as a believer today? 00:06:42.000 --> 00:06:48.000 What do you see? Do you see merely theological, or intellectually theological terms? 00:06:48.000 --> 00:06:52.000 Do you see in ritualistic terms, or moralistic terms? 00:06:52.000 --> 00:06:58.000 Or is it a cold relationship, a ritualistic, distant? 00:06:58.000 --> 00:07:03.000 Is it a fearful relationship? Is it an authoritarian relationship? 00:07:03.000 --> 00:07:09.000 If so, you are missing one of the central themes of the Bible in your relationship with God, 00:07:09.000 --> 00:07:14.000 which is that Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners of whom I am the worst, 00:07:14.000 --> 00:07:18.000 in order that we are friends with God, friends with God. 00:07:18.000 --> 00:07:20.000 That is His own terminology for us. 00:07:20.000 --> 00:07:28.000 And of course, not only vertically friends, but also as we understand that concept, 00:07:28.000 --> 00:07:34.000 it absolutely applies to our horizontal relationships in Christ with one another. 00:07:34.000 --> 00:07:38.000 We are friends in Christ as believers. 00:07:38.000 --> 00:07:49.000 Now, this is very significant. Paul, Peter, James, John and Jude, New Testament writers, 00:07:49.000 --> 00:07:56.000 they all understood that. 23 times in their letters, they refer to the people of God 00:07:56.000 --> 00:08:00.000 to whom they are writing as dear friends. 00:08:00.000 --> 00:08:04.000 It was central to their understanding of the Christian community. 00:08:04.000 --> 00:08:13.000 We share a common Savior and friend, and it's the heart of our understanding of community and of church. 00:08:13.000 --> 00:08:20.000 We have a common Father and a shared grace, and we have a common enemy of our soul. 00:08:20.000 --> 00:08:28.000 And it's an enemy who can only be defeated as we do what? 00:08:28.000 --> 00:08:35.000 As we deal with the sin that separates us from one another and stops us from calling each other friends. 00:08:35.000 --> 00:08:42.000 The judgment, the gossip, the natural antipathy, the mistrust, the envy, 00:08:42.000 --> 00:08:47.000 the differences that we make judgments on. 00:08:47.000 --> 00:08:51.000 You know what you need to do and what I need to do in the Christian community? 00:08:51.000 --> 00:08:59.000 We don't need to kind of in a soft theological way or in a sappy understanding of truth, 00:08:59.000 --> 00:09:04.000 but we have to will to be friends. We will to be friends. 00:09:04.000 --> 00:09:09.000 It's not about natural attractions only. 00:09:09.000 --> 00:09:15.000 It is willing to be friends because we have a common Savior and we have a common family 00:09:15.000 --> 00:09:22.000 and we have a common destination and we have a common indwelling of the Spirit. 00:09:22.000 --> 00:09:32.000 So it's very theologically, crystal-centric, it's very theologically core to our understanding of the gospel in the Bible. 00:09:32.000 --> 00:09:37.000 Can I look briefly at the story or at least at the friendship of David and Jonathan? 00:09:37.000 --> 00:09:43.000 It's both an inspiration for us and an example for us of friendship as God intends it to be. 00:09:43.000 --> 00:09:46.000 We read a little bit from chapter 18. 00:09:46.000 --> 00:09:48.000 We didn't read any of chapter 20. 00:09:48.000 --> 00:09:55.000 If you have time, go home and read chapter 20 because that's a big bulk of the story of David and Jonathan 00:09:55.000 --> 00:10:02.000 and the way they interacted and how Jonathan found out about his father's hatred of David 00:10:02.000 --> 00:10:06.000 and warned him in the whole...read the story. It's a great story. 00:10:06.000 --> 00:10:11.000 And then read chapter 20, which is David's lament. 00:10:11.000 --> 00:10:20.000 Sorry, no, chapter 1 of 2 Samuel, which is David's lament for Saul and for Jonathan. 00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:22.000 How the mighty have fallen. 00:10:22.000 --> 00:10:28.000 A powerful, moving, emotional account. We'll mention one or two bits of it. 00:10:28.000 --> 00:10:32.000 This is the kind of godly friendship that we should strive after. 00:10:32.000 --> 00:10:40.000 Now, before I do that, I'm going to mention an interpretative bias that we need to deal with when we are reading Scripture. 00:10:40.000 --> 00:10:47.000 Remember today, when we read...every time you read Scripture, we recognize it as God's word, okay? 00:10:47.000 --> 00:10:55.000 And we recognize it as God's word that has been written and inspired by men through the Holy Spirit. 00:10:55.000 --> 00:11:03.000 They were given God's word, it was breathed out through them into real situations, into real cultures 00:11:03.000 --> 00:11:09.000 and into specific historical redemptive settings. 00:11:09.000 --> 00:11:19.000 And it was written to original readers or listeners first and also then, obviously, to us all. 00:11:19.000 --> 00:11:25.000 And so as we read Scripture, we need to read it with our minds as well as our hearts 00:11:25.000 --> 00:11:33.000 and recognize the culture into which it was written and the people who were the first recipients of that word. 00:11:33.000 --> 00:11:40.000 We need to understand the culture and the times in which the Bible was written. Now, for the ancient Near East, that's not that easy for us. 00:11:40.000 --> 00:11:49.000 We are 21st century Western Scots and others. And the ancient Near East is very culturally different to us. 00:11:49.000 --> 00:11:55.000 And so sometimes we find that very difficult. It requires work. It requires effort on our part. 00:11:55.000 --> 00:12:06.000 Sometimes to understand, the danger is that we impose 21st century Western, sometimes Scottish, cultural lenses to what is God's word. 00:12:06.000 --> 00:12:11.000 We all need to be aware of not doing that. You know, we don't put a kilt on David, for example. 00:12:11.000 --> 00:12:17.000 Silly example, but you know what I mean? Nobody haggis then in the Old Testament. 00:12:17.000 --> 00:12:23.000 We need to understand the culture and understand the society in which the word was written. 00:12:23.000 --> 00:12:33.000 Now, many liberal modern interpretations of the story of David and Jonathan will have them in a homosexual relationship. 00:12:33.000 --> 00:12:47.000 It's the language of lovers, clearly, obviously. David's lament, which we didn't read in 1 Samuel 1, he speaks of his love for Jonathan as more wonderful than that of women. 00:12:47.000 --> 00:13:02.000 Chapter 1 verse 26, I'm going to say more about that later. But that is reading this ancient Near East text of God's word with 21st century lens. 00:13:02.000 --> 00:13:09.000 There's nothing in the text to suggest that David and Jonathan were in any sense homosexual lovers. 00:13:09.000 --> 00:13:18.000 It goes against the clear teaching of the covenant ethics of the Lord that they both adhered to. They were married. 00:13:18.000 --> 00:13:29.000 David himself did battle with heterosexual faithfulness later on, and it's recorded in Scripture, but it's also exposed as sin. 00:13:29.000 --> 00:13:43.000 It's simply not either explicit or implicit in the text, nor would it have been understood as such by the original readers. It's absolutely a reflection of an obsession with sexualization of all of society 00:13:43.000 --> 00:13:52.000 and the gender fluid narrative that is being imposed on all of society, including Scripture. 00:13:52.000 --> 00:14:10.000 This is about a good, God-centered and vital same-sex friendship, a vital part of life for us, especially redeemed life, should I say, and something we aim to and look to develop in our churches, 00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:18.000 and in general terms in society, in the world in which we live, but particularly in our relationships in churches. 00:14:18.000 --> 00:14:29.000 So what were the characteristics of this godly friendship? The first is it was a godly friendship. 00:14:29.000 --> 00:14:40.000 We're told in verse 1, as soon as he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul, 00:14:40.000 --> 00:14:47.000 loved him like himself. They were one in spirit, and they were very close at that level, and Jonathan loved David as himself. 00:14:47.000 --> 00:14:53.000 Now that's biblical language when it speaks about loving someone else as himself. 00:14:53.000 --> 00:15:02.000 In Leviticus chapter 19 and verse 18, right in the middle of the Old Testament, explaining the commandments, 00:15:02.000 --> 00:15:08.000 you shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against the sons of your own people, but you shall love your neighbour as yourself. 00:15:08.000 --> 00:15:13.000 I am the Lord. That's the same kind of language that's been used of David and Jonathan. 00:15:13.000 --> 00:15:21.000 Jonathan loved him as himself, or of course Jesus outworks that in Mark chapter 12, verse 13, 31. 00:15:21.000 --> 00:15:25.000 This is a summary of the commandments. Love the Lord your God. 00:15:25.000 --> 00:15:31.000 And then the second is this, you shall love your neighbour as yourself. There is no other commandment greater than these. 00:15:31.000 --> 00:15:38.000 It was an outworking of God's pattern for brotherly friendships. 00:15:38.000 --> 00:15:48.000 It was a close knit, deep bond of friendship. Brotherly, could I say, brotherly and law friendship, because they were brothers in law. 00:15:48.000 --> 00:15:54.000 Because David was, at this point, married to Michael, who was Jonathan's sister. They were brothers in law. 00:15:54.000 --> 00:16:03.000 But they also had this oneness in spirit. They were knit. He was knit to the soul. They were real close guys together. 00:16:03.000 --> 00:16:08.000 They felt as one. Jonathan was inspired by David's victory because Jonathan himself was a soldier. 00:16:08.000 --> 00:16:13.000 They were fighting men and their characters that hit off with one another. 00:16:13.000 --> 00:16:19.000 Immediately they just got on well together. There's probably only, this is a slight aside, 00:16:19.000 --> 00:16:25.000 there's probably only over maybe two or three, at most three people that you'll ever be like that within your life. 00:16:25.000 --> 00:16:31.000 One in soul. Absolutely. The moment you meet you, there's this closeness. 00:16:31.000 --> 00:16:36.000 But there's wider character of six of friendship also. So it's a godly friendship. 00:16:36.000 --> 00:16:40.000 It was also a covenantal friendship in verse three. 00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:46.000 We're told that Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as his own soul. 00:16:46.000 --> 00:16:50.000 And then if you could, if you have your Bibles with you, flick forward to chapter 20. 00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:55.000 I kind of wish we'd had more time to read this, but we didn't. But please do read it. 00:16:55.000 --> 00:17:01.000 But David and Jonathan are interacting and in verse eight of this chapter, Jonathan says, 00:17:01.000 --> 00:17:07.000 No, it's 20. Yeah, verse eight. 00:17:07.000 --> 00:17:09.000 Therefore, Jonathan's speaking to David here and he says, 00:17:09.000 --> 00:17:15.000 Therefore, deal kindly with your servant, for you have brought your servant into a covenant of the Lord with you. 00:17:15.000 --> 00:17:22.000 But if there is guilt in me, kill me yourself for why should you bring me to your Father? 00:17:22.000 --> 00:17:31.000 I was David speaking to Jonathan. And there's this clear covenantal relationship that they had. 00:17:31.000 --> 00:17:39.000 We're told that they had a covenantal relationship of love with one another. 00:17:39.000 --> 00:17:47.000 And it's a tremendously powerful love. 00:17:47.000 --> 00:17:51.000 In verse 17, Jonathan made David swear again by his love for him, for he loved him as his own soul. 00:17:51.000 --> 00:18:01.000 And the word is used as the hesed word of the Old Testament, the covenantal word that's used of God's love for his people. 00:18:01.000 --> 00:18:10.000 And it holds really strong ideas of loyalty and of sacrifice. 00:18:10.000 --> 00:18:21.000 And this relationship was more than just a deep friendship. There was something formal about it. 00:18:21.000 --> 00:18:29.000 We don't really do that kind of friendship marriage, possibly, is a covenant of love relationship. 00:18:29.000 --> 00:18:31.000 That's been a man and a woman. 00:18:31.000 --> 00:18:36.000 But when I was growing up, used to watch cowboy films a long time ago, 40 years ago. 00:18:36.000 --> 00:18:41.000 And cowboy films in these days, it was cowboys and Indians. That's where it was cowboys and Indians. 00:18:41.000 --> 00:18:48.000 And the Indians were baddies and the cowboys were goodies. It was a kind of very clear and unrealistic picture. 00:18:48.000 --> 00:18:55.000 But sometimes there would be a really good Indian who would make friends with a real rebel cowboy. 00:18:55.000 --> 00:19:02.000 And they became blood brothers. And so they would cut their finger with a knife. Remember that? 00:19:02.000 --> 00:19:08.000 They would each cut each other's fingers and they would fuse the blood together. Blood, blood friends for life. 00:19:08.000 --> 00:19:15.000 And that's a kind of covenant. That's the nearest thing I could think of to relatively modern day. 00:19:15.000 --> 00:19:20.000 Those are under 30 here, maybe. We wouldn't find that to be the case. 00:19:20.000 --> 00:19:28.000 But blood brother, there's a steadfastness about it. It was a promise, a great promise 00:19:28.000 --> 00:19:35.000 of loyalty in chapter 20 again at verse 42 towards the end. 00:19:35.000 --> 00:19:42.000 Then Jonathan said to David, go in peace, because we have sworn both of us in the name of the Lord saying, 00:19:42.000 --> 00:19:47.000 the Lord shall be between me and you and my offspring and your offspring forever. 00:19:47.000 --> 00:19:52.000 So it wasn't just about their friendship. It was about friendship right down the line 00:19:52.000 --> 00:19:55.000 and how they would treat one another as families. So it was really loyal. 00:19:55.000 --> 00:20:01.000 And because it was loyal, it was also sacrificial as a covenant friendship. 00:20:01.000 --> 00:20:09.000 Verse 42 says it was done in God's name. And it was sacrificial because you know that the bit we read, 00:20:09.000 --> 00:20:16.000 the bit we read were Jonathan and David in chapter 18. They love each other really closely. 00:20:16.000 --> 00:20:24.000 And Jonathan makes a covenant and he disrobes himself in front of David. 00:20:24.000 --> 00:20:32.000 That was a formal act he was doing. Whether he knew from God or whether he just presumed, 00:20:32.000 --> 00:20:37.000 but what he saw in David was that David would be the next successor to the throne. 00:20:37.000 --> 00:20:41.000 It was Jonathan's rightful place. Jonathan was next in line to Saul. 00:20:41.000 --> 00:20:46.000 But whether he'd been told by God or whether he knew that David had already been anointed as God's next inch, 00:20:46.000 --> 00:20:52.000 the way he defeated Goliath made him realize it's not going to be me. It's going to be David. 00:20:52.000 --> 00:21:01.000 And so the disrobing was a transfer of his succession rights as the crown prince. 00:21:01.000 --> 00:21:05.000 That's what he was doing. He was handing over what was rightfully his as the crown prince. 00:21:05.000 --> 00:21:11.000 Really costly friendship. He was saying, you're God's man. I'm not going to be the next king. You are. 00:21:11.000 --> 00:21:17.000 But I will be loyal to you to the end. Hugely humble. 00:21:17.000 --> 00:21:30.000 And at the same time, it was sacrificial for David because David, when Jonathan in chapter 20 asks for David to protect his family after if he dies, 00:21:30.000 --> 00:21:37.000 David promises to do so. That also was greatly costly. Not in 21st century terms, maybe Scottish terms, 00:21:37.000 --> 00:21:44.000 but in ancient Near East terms, that was really costly because the general idea was you annihilated anyone who had a rightful place to the throne. 00:21:44.000 --> 00:21:52.000 You annihilated them and their family. So Jonathan could have rightly wanted to annihilate David as a threat. 00:21:52.000 --> 00:22:01.000 And David could have rightly annihilated Jonathan's family after Jonathan died because they could have been a threat. 00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:08.000 But Corrie preached one of his best sermons here when he preached about David and Mephidchev. 00:22:08.000 --> 00:22:17.000 Jonathan's son and how David treated him because they were in a covenant friendship. It wasn't elimination. 00:22:17.000 --> 00:22:25.000 It was protection and love and humility and service. So it was a covenant relationship, but it was also a heart relationship. 00:22:25.000 --> 00:22:34.000 In verse 41 of chapter 20, I know it's hard jumping to verses that we haven't read the story, 00:22:34.000 --> 00:22:43.000 but when they part from one another because they have to because Saul is trying to kill David, we should... 00:22:43.000 --> 00:22:51.000 We're told that David gave... I'll carry on. So see, this is difficult. Go in peace because... 00:22:51.000 --> 00:23:00.000 I don't know, that's not the right verse. I'm looking for verse 41. Yeah, sorry, I can't see it for looking. 00:23:00.000 --> 00:23:07.000 As soon as the boy had gone, David rose from beside the stone heap and fell on his face to the ground and bowed three times. 00:23:07.000 --> 00:23:16.000 They kissed one another and wept with one another. David weeping the most. They kissed and they wept. 00:23:16.000 --> 00:23:24.000 Dodgy? Well, it's very similar to Paul's parting with the Ephesians elder. 00:23:24.000 --> 00:23:33.000 Ephesians elders in Acts chapter 2037, I think we have that for the screen. And there was much weeping on the part of all. 00:23:33.000 --> 00:23:40.000 They embraced Paul and kissed him. Do you talk about that as a homosexual relationship between Paul and the elders? 00:23:40.000 --> 00:23:44.000 No, we don't talk about that because we understand the cultural. It's a cultural kiss, isn't it? 00:23:44.000 --> 00:23:49.000 Between brothers. And absolutely, it was this heart friendship. They were sharing life and soul. 00:23:49.000 --> 00:23:57.000 It was a heart relationship. And as David says in 2 Samuel chapter 1 and verse 26, 00:23:57.000 --> 00:24:05.000 Do if you have time, read that when you go home. It says, lament when David, when Saul and Jonathan are killed in battle. 00:24:05.000 --> 00:24:10.000 He says, I am distressed for you, my brother Jonathan. Very pleasant you have been to me. 00:24:10.000 --> 00:24:21.000 For your love to me was extraordinary, surpassing the love of women. How the mighty have fallen and the weapons of war perished. 00:24:21.000 --> 00:24:29.000 Better than the love of women. Now, that means that for David, his relationship with Jonathan was unparalleled. 00:24:29.000 --> 00:24:39.000 It was better for him than sexual love. And that is a significant and important thing. 00:24:39.000 --> 00:24:47.000 It was deeper than blood. It was deeper than marriage. In other words, there was no lust attached to this friendship. 00:24:47.000 --> 00:24:55.000 It wasn't distorted by physical attraction, which many male-female relationships are. 00:24:55.000 --> 00:25:05.000 It was a pure level. It wasn't lustful. And nor in David's case, it was an arranged relationship. 00:25:05.000 --> 00:25:17.000 Up to this point, his marriages and would-be were arranged by others and sometimes for political reasons. 00:25:17.000 --> 00:25:31.000 And so it may have been that David hadn't truly experienced a real loving relationship with a woman in a way that would have maybe kept him from saying what he said. 00:25:31.000 --> 00:25:43.000 And maybe Bathsheba was that first genuine love affair he had. We dealt with that in not a good way, of course. 00:25:43.000 --> 00:25:54.000 But it was an amazing, deep, heartfelt friendship, and of course one that was broken. 00:25:54.000 --> 00:26:04.000 Isn't that the hardest thing in this life? Whether it's a marriage or the closeness of friendships. It's broken. 00:26:04.000 --> 00:26:09.000 It's one of the bitterness of living in this world, isn't it? 00:26:09.000 --> 00:26:16.000 Read David's lament. Take time to read David's lament. It's the pain of being in a broken world. 00:26:16.000 --> 00:26:26.000 As you sit beside your lover today, your husband, your wife, your best friend, maybe. Same-sex friendship. 00:26:26.000 --> 00:26:38.000 Sometimes in your weakest or saddest moments you think about that relationship being broken, sin destroys the best of all relationships, 00:26:38.000 --> 00:26:46.000 apart from our one with Christ alone. So it's a heartfelt relationship and experience the brokenness of that heartfelt reality. 00:26:46.000 --> 00:26:51.000 And I finish with this in conclusion to make a statement. 00:26:51.000 --> 00:26:58.000 What a need we have for such friendships as David and Jonathan's in the church. 00:26:58.000 --> 00:27:01.000 Now I know we need it generally. I know we need it in our relationships with the world. 00:27:01.000 --> 00:27:05.000 But I think, and I'm not saying that other friendships don't matter. They're vital. 00:27:05.000 --> 00:27:15.000 But as we understand the nature of true godly friendship, the characteristics that flow from that will influence all our friendships 00:27:15.000 --> 00:27:21.000 and all our love for other people who are not Christians themselves, will develop. 00:27:21.000 --> 00:27:32.000 What a need we have for these kind of friendships in the church. It's fundamental, I would say, but rare to our humanity as image-bearers. 00:27:32.000 --> 00:27:39.000 And I think there's degrees within that friendship. I think within the family of God we are to love one another. 00:27:39.000 --> 00:27:49.000 And I'll mention briefly these characteristics. There's to be a committed sacrificial love to each other, all of us, to one another. 00:27:49.000 --> 00:27:57.000 But there will be within the church one or two, or maybe three, in any Christian community with whom you're one in spirit, 00:27:57.000 --> 00:28:01.000 like David and Jonathan. You'll not be that with everyone. We can't be that with everyone. It's impossible. 00:28:01.000 --> 00:28:06.000 It's far too emotionally draining for a start. It's just with the one or two. 00:28:06.000 --> 00:28:11.000 And that's not to cause envy in the church. Don't be envious because other people have that kind of friendship. 00:28:11.000 --> 00:28:18.000 It may be within a marriage, but I'm saying something different. One same-sex friendship. It's a good thing. 00:28:18.000 --> 00:28:26.000 Jesus had it. Jesus had it with the inner group of disciples, among the twelve, and he was perfect. 00:28:26.000 --> 00:28:31.000 But so within that there's the broad and then there's the focused, and then there's the one. 00:28:31.000 --> 00:28:41.000 Okay, remember the one. Friendship with Christ. Develop your friendship with Christ, the concept of your friendship with Christ. 00:28:41.000 --> 00:28:50.000 Remember that. And develop the characteristics of the friendship that we have between here, reveal between David and Jonathan. 00:28:50.000 --> 00:28:57.000 It was deep. It was committed. It was loyal. It was sacrificial. It was costly. 00:28:57.000 --> 00:29:03.000 Now that is why we have banged on here for years and years and years about the importance of relationships 00:29:03.000 --> 00:29:09.000 and the importance of community within the church. It's not soft-soaping the gospel. It's not the easy option. 00:29:09.000 --> 00:29:18.000 It is not the easy option. Self-righteousness and legalism is much, much easier and being completely isolated, much easier. 00:29:18.000 --> 00:29:25.000 It's the hardest thing to do, but we bang on about the importance of community being core to our thinking, 00:29:25.000 --> 00:29:31.000 because we don't believe in ritualism and we don't believe in moralism. We believe we're image-bearers, 00:29:31.000 --> 00:29:37.000 and as image-bearers we seek to be friends with God and friends, therefore with one another. 00:29:37.000 --> 00:29:45.000 It's the core of our mission, and it means that we eyeball each other and confess our sins. 00:29:45.000 --> 00:29:50.000 It means we recognize our weakness. It means we work hard at not taking the huff. 00:29:50.000 --> 00:30:00.000 It means we don't become embittered, and it means we work desperately hard at being protecting one another against the evil one. 00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:05.000 Friendship with others, sharing Christ, sharing love. 00:30:05.000 --> 00:30:11.000 And remember that is heart friendship, as it was with David and Jonathan. 00:30:11.000 --> 00:30:19.000 As brothers and sisters in heart relationships, that will mean our relationships are accountable to one another. 00:30:19.000 --> 00:30:22.000 They are real and they are vulnerable. 00:30:22.000 --> 00:30:29.000 Now, I know this quote has been made quite recently from the church, and I take it as mine, although it's C.S. Lewis's. 00:30:29.000 --> 00:30:36.000 The only reason I take it as mine is because I've included it in my marriage booklet that I do with people who are getting married. 00:30:36.000 --> 00:30:42.000 I think, maybe, Corry, or someone mentioned it recently, fairly recently, about love. 00:30:42.000 --> 00:30:45.000 To love at all is to be vulnerable. 00:30:45.000 --> 00:30:50.000 Love anything, your heart will certainly be run and possibly be broken. 00:30:50.000 --> 00:30:57.000 If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. 00:30:57.000 --> 00:31:00.000 Wrap it carefully around with hobbies and little luxuries. 00:31:00.000 --> 00:31:08.000 Avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. 00:31:08.000 --> 00:31:16.000 But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. 00:31:16.000 --> 00:31:24.000 It will not be broken. It will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. 00:31:24.000 --> 00:31:33.000 See, it's costly to love like Christ loves, and to love one another. There will be tears, and of course, there will be loss. 00:31:33.000 --> 00:31:41.000 You will lose your best friend. You will lose your husband. You will lose your wife. You will lose your children. 00:31:41.000 --> 00:31:44.000 They will lose you. 00:31:44.000 --> 00:31:50.000 But all of it must drive us to the one who ultimately wipes away every tear, 00:31:50.000 --> 00:31:54.000 and from whom we will be in this glorious relationship with love eternally. 00:31:54.000 --> 00:32:04.000 If you don't know Jesus as your friend, can I ask you to plead with Him to reveal Himself to you as your friend, 00:32:04.000 --> 00:32:10.000 and to reveal your own heart to yourself to see your need of Him as a friend? 00:32:10.000 --> 00:32:13.000 That's Bowerheads in prayer. 00:32:13.000 --> 00:32:20.000 Father, God help us to understand who you are and understand the nature of true friendship. 00:32:20.000 --> 00:32:28.000 May we not be glib and simplistic in either the way we call each other friends or treat each other as friends. 00:32:28.000 --> 00:32:40.000 And may we not be selective, only attracting ourselves and expending ourselves on those who we would naturally be attracted to. 00:32:40.000 --> 00:32:50.000 May we see the people of God as our family and as our blood and as our brothers and sisters. 00:32:50.000 --> 00:32:55.000 And may we expend ourselves in loving one another. 00:32:55.000 --> 00:33:00.000 And bless the one-spirit friendships in this church. 00:33:00.000 --> 00:33:06.000 May we not be jealous of others who have them. May we strive after them ourselves. 00:33:06.000 --> 00:33:15.000 And may we recognise as we hear Scripture what God is, what light He is shining into our own hearts 00:33:15.000 --> 00:33:23.000 that may need His convicting power and can transform in grace to change. 00:33:23.000 --> 00:33:37.000 We ask it in Jesus' name, Amen.