WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.759 Let me give you a few events and you see if you can guess what they have in common. 00:00:07.640 --> 00:00:09.339 These are all from 2014. 00:00:10.540 --> 00:00:13.040 Event number one, March 7th. 00:00:13.540 --> 00:00:18.679 Newsweek wrote an article and in that article they claimed to have discovered the inventor of Bitcoin. 00:00:20.300 --> 00:00:22.000 Event number two, May 15th. 00:00:23.699 --> 00:00:27.839 A company called Free People put out an ad featuring a ballet dancer. 00:00:27.839 --> 00:00:35.399 Turns out later that the person portraying a ballet dancer in the ad wasn't actually a ballet dancer. 00:00:37.320 --> 00:00:38.840 Event three, August 28th. 00:00:40.039 --> 00:00:44.960 It was announced that Hello Kitty is not in fact a cat. 00:00:48.140 --> 00:00:52.079 I have no doubt that you remember with great detail each of these events. 00:00:52.820 --> 00:00:55.179 And they have each made an indelible mark on your psyche. 00:00:55.179 --> 00:01:00.200 If you don't remember these events, they all happened in 2014. 00:01:01.159 --> 00:01:02.840 The thing that they have in common is this. 00:01:02.939 --> 00:01:08.280 Each one of these events, when it happened or when the announcement was made or when the ad came out, 00:01:08.819 --> 00:01:18.620 catalyzed an enormous outpouring of rage and condemnation and anger in the Twittersphere. 00:01:19.920 --> 00:01:21.180 Internet outrage. 00:01:21.180 --> 00:01:22.100 Outrage. 00:01:22.100 --> 00:01:22.180 Outrage. 00:01:22.340 --> 00:01:31.720 And I found all of these from an article published on Slate about the year 2014, which they dubbed the year of outrage. 00:01:32.420 --> 00:01:34.680 And they actually, if you haven't seen this, it's pretty entertaining. 00:01:34.820 --> 00:01:37.200 I spent way, way too much time looking at this this week. 00:01:37.200 --> 00:01:42.320 But they have a calendar, an interactive calendar, with every single day of 2014. 00:01:42.740 --> 00:01:54.120 And they were able to find something on every day that created a massive outpouring of vitriol and hatred and condemnation and disgust on the Internet. 00:01:54.659 --> 00:01:55.820 It was the year of outrage. 00:01:55.819 --> 00:01:56.019 Outrage. 00:01:56.539 --> 00:02:03.079 And what this tells us, and there were a lot of articles about this, is that more and more and more we live in an outrage culture. 00:02:04.019 --> 00:02:05.739 We live in an outrage culture. 00:02:06.259 --> 00:02:13.539 It's as though we used to get our drama from soap operas, and then we moved to reality TV shows, and now we just have reality. 00:02:13.539 --> 00:02:25.000 And, but we have access to so much reality at any given moment, it provides an endless font of entertainment, an endless fodder for outrage over reaction. 00:02:26.180 --> 00:02:29.620 And it's interesting to see how this permeates every aspect of culture. 00:02:29.959 --> 00:02:30.919 Some of it is legitimate. 00:02:31.359 --> 00:02:32.359 A lot of it is not. 00:02:33.039 --> 00:02:37.599 But outrage is sort of the emotion du jour of our time. 00:02:37.599 --> 00:02:42.819 And, you know, it's even in some ways permeated Advent a little bit. 00:02:43.439 --> 00:02:49.060 You know, it's very easy if you're a part of this community to, you know, that you might experience that there are tensions, 00:02:49.199 --> 00:02:55.219 like the tension between people who have been here a while, the kind of old timers and then the newcomers, right? 00:02:56.079 --> 00:03:01.939 There's tensions that exist between people who live in Northwest and people who live in Northeast, you know? 00:03:01.939 --> 00:03:11.939 There's tension that exists between people who have kids and people who don't have kids, and kind of mutual resentments that, kind of rumblings, you know? 00:03:12.099 --> 00:03:15.159 There's tension between people who are single and people who are married. 00:03:15.759 --> 00:03:25.599 There's all different kinds of sort of tensions that can bubble up, and you feel that sense of the outrage culture kind of seeping in through the cracks of the windows and the doors. 00:03:26.579 --> 00:03:30.560 And I think that there's a reason why outrage is so popular. 00:03:30.560 --> 00:03:32.860 It's pretty common sense. 00:03:32.960 --> 00:03:34.319 It's because it feels good. 00:03:35.719 --> 00:03:36.920 It feels good. 00:03:38.159 --> 00:03:41.020 You know, righteous indignation feels good. 00:03:41.199 --> 00:03:42.400 You feel powerful. 00:03:42.920 --> 00:03:43.900 You feel right. 00:03:44.080 --> 00:03:45.039 You feel vindicated. 00:03:45.860 --> 00:03:50.860 It feels really good to know that there's a line in the sand, and thank God you're on the right side of it. 00:03:52.180 --> 00:03:54.020 You know, not so much the other people. 00:03:54.780 --> 00:03:55.920 It feels good. 00:03:56.280 --> 00:03:57.300 It feels powerful. 00:03:57.300 --> 00:04:06.080 But the thing is, when Jesus is teaching about the kingdom of God, he says the kingdom of God doesn't have an outrage culture. 00:04:06.939 --> 00:04:08.420 It has a forgiveness culture. 00:04:09.460 --> 00:04:10.920 It has a forgiveness culture. 00:04:11.960 --> 00:04:16.019 And unlike outrage, forgiveness doesn't initially feel good. 00:04:16.980 --> 00:04:18.439 It actually feels the opposite. 00:04:18.759 --> 00:04:19.939 It feels bad. 00:04:20.379 --> 00:04:21.259 It hurts. 00:04:21.740 --> 00:04:22.580 It's hard. 00:04:22.579 --> 00:04:24.939 It makes you feel weak. 00:04:26.079 --> 00:04:30.699 It makes you feel a lack of fairness, an injustice. 00:04:31.379 --> 00:04:34.659 These are the feelings that are associated with true forgiveness. 00:04:34.660 --> 00:04:42.720 Even the rabbis in Jesus' day, even the rabbis, believed that forgiveness should have limitations. 00:04:42.980 --> 00:04:46.040 They taught that you should forgive around three times max. 00:04:47.440 --> 00:04:49.220 You know, one offense, you should forgive. 00:04:49.340 --> 00:04:51.120 Two offenses, well, that's possible. 00:04:51.240 --> 00:04:51.680 You should forgive. 00:04:51.879 --> 00:04:54.260 Three offenses, well, we want to be generous people. 00:04:54.460 --> 00:04:58.840 But after that, you're probably being taken advantage of, and so you should withhold forgiveness. 00:04:58.940 --> 00:04:59.720 Three times max. 00:04:59.720 --> 00:04:59.760 Seven times. 00:05:00.520 --> 00:05:06.760 So when Peter comes to Jesus in this section of Matthew that we've just read, and Peter says, well, how many times should we forgive? 00:05:07.080 --> 00:05:07.480 Seven? 00:05:08.480 --> 00:05:15.540 Well, Peter is doing the math, and he's thinking, well, the rabbis, the rabbis say a maximum of three, but Jesus is always blowing our minds. 00:05:16.040 --> 00:05:19.120 And so Jesus is probably going to say something more than three. 00:05:19.540 --> 00:05:22.440 So to be on the safe side, I'm going to say this ridiculous number. 00:05:22.600 --> 00:05:22.960 Seven? 00:05:22.959 --> 00:05:23.079 Seven? 00:05:24.500 --> 00:05:31.879 And then if you look at Jesus' response, it's either translated 77 or 70 times 7. 00:05:32.519 --> 00:05:33.919 But either way, the point is clear. 00:05:34.019 --> 00:05:39.500 Jesus is saying, in the kingdom of God, forgiveness is unconditional and unlimited. 00:05:41.339 --> 00:05:44.839 He's saying, in the kingdom of God, the culture is this, that you forgive. 00:05:46.339 --> 00:05:47.339 Ad infinitum. 00:05:48.199 --> 00:05:50.979 You forgive, and you forgive, and you forgive, and you forgive. 00:05:50.980 --> 00:06:00.540 At the heart of the kingdom of God, which is the kingdom that Jesus has brought into this world, there is unconditional, unlimited forgiveness. 00:06:01.580 --> 00:06:03.280 And here's the thing we're going to look at tonight. 00:06:03.400 --> 00:06:08.819 Unless we understand that and what it means, we can't really understand Jesus. 00:06:09.800 --> 00:06:17.560 And unless that kind of forgiveness is a reality in our lives, we really, in no meaningful sense, can be a part of the kingdom of God. 00:06:17.800 --> 00:06:18.400 Harsh words. 00:06:18.399 --> 00:06:20.899 But that's what it says. 00:06:21.560 --> 00:06:27.199 So we're going to look at Matthew chapter 18, verses 15 to 17, and then 21 to 35, under three headers. 00:06:27.399 --> 00:06:29.079 Why is forgiveness necessary? 00:06:30.719 --> 00:06:31.639 Why is it necessary? 00:06:32.439 --> 00:06:34.060 What does forgiveness require? 00:06:35.219 --> 00:06:37.699 And then how is forgiveness like this even possible? 00:06:38.799 --> 00:06:39.459 Let's pray. 00:06:39.459 --> 00:06:52.139 Father, even with a bit of humor, Lord, we don't want to overshadow the severity of this issue. 00:06:52.139 --> 00:07:02.779 I know that many of us in this room have or even are now struggling with deep hurt and pain. 00:07:02.779 --> 00:07:16.359 Lord, we may be looking at situations and we cannot even imagine forgiving, much less going a day without thinking about the hurt that we've experienced, Lord. 00:07:17.319 --> 00:07:20.399 I know this reality in my own heart, as you well know, God. 00:07:20.399 --> 00:07:28.419 And we ask collectively that what we cannot do on our own, you would do in us through your word tonight. 00:07:28.899 --> 00:07:30.299 And we ask this in your son's name. 00:07:30.539 --> 00:07:30.759 Amen. 00:07:30.759 --> 00:07:35.019 So first of all, the question we want to ask is this. 00:07:35.579 --> 00:07:37.480 Why is forgiveness so necessary? 00:07:37.680 --> 00:07:38.459 Why is it crucial? 00:07:39.959 --> 00:07:42.579 And there's really two reasons we can see in this passage. 00:07:43.039 --> 00:07:47.019 The first section of the passage, you realize there's kind of two sections here. 00:07:47.379 --> 00:07:53.180 There's teaching that Jesus gives on how the community should operate when it comes to sin and conflict. 00:07:53.379 --> 00:07:54.360 And then there's a parable. 00:07:55.099 --> 00:07:57.819 And the hinge is this question that Peter asks. 00:07:57.819 --> 00:08:06.500 But in the opening of our passage, Jesus is teaching about the community and how the community should handle and respond to sin in its midst. 00:08:07.000 --> 00:08:14.339 And you see in verses 15 to 17, Jesus is actually describing a specific process for handling sin and conflict. 00:08:15.139 --> 00:08:17.759 And you can see that sometimes it involves the whole community. 00:08:17.920 --> 00:08:21.980 You should go and talk to the person one-on-one about the issue. 00:08:22.120 --> 00:08:22.639 Talk to them. 00:08:22.779 --> 00:08:24.060 Figure out what's actually going on. 00:08:24.120 --> 00:08:24.980 Is sin involved? 00:08:24.980 --> 00:08:30.740 If there is and they don't recognize it, they don't own it, then you should go and bring a couple of witnesses. 00:08:31.780 --> 00:08:36.460 And then if the person still refuses to acknowledge the sin, then you should bring it to the community. 00:08:37.440 --> 00:08:46.800 And then if the community is still unable to persuade this person that the sin is a reality, then they need to be treated as a tax collector or a Gentile. 00:08:46.799 --> 00:08:52.219 And if that sounds harsh to you, remember that Jesus loves tax collectors and Gentiles. 00:08:52.279 --> 00:09:01.919 In other words, this person should be treated as though they have erected a barrier between themselves and God, which is effectively what it is. 00:09:01.959 --> 00:09:02.779 So that's what it's saying. 00:09:03.759 --> 00:09:08.259 And we read this, we look at this, and some people read this and say, well, why do we need a process? 00:09:08.259 --> 00:09:13.879 In fact, why is my life or what I choose to do anybody else's business? 00:09:14.899 --> 00:09:19.679 You know, I can't imagine being in a community where people would actually come and butt into the way I'm living my life. 00:09:19.899 --> 00:09:20.899 I'm not hurting anybody. 00:09:21.620 --> 00:09:25.519 And all of a sudden, I've got people coming to me and talking to me about what I should or shouldn't be doing. 00:09:25.659 --> 00:09:27.019 What a horrible judgmental community. 00:09:27.019 --> 00:09:35.000 That's because we tend to think of these things purely in individualistic ways. 00:09:36.419 --> 00:09:39.279 We think that they are things that only affect us. 00:09:39.379 --> 00:09:41.279 But the Bible would say that's really, really naive. 00:09:42.659 --> 00:09:51.139 It actually makes clear in a number of places that the choices we make, and especially our sin and especially conflict we may have with other people, 00:09:52.159 --> 00:09:56.220 that that invariably has an impact on the people around us. 00:09:56.220 --> 00:10:00.460 Not only the people that we know and care about, but maybe even people we don't know we're impacting. 00:10:01.860 --> 00:10:06.420 You know, there's a place, Hebrews 12, warns about the root of bitterness. 00:10:07.360 --> 00:10:15.139 And it talks about how if the root of bitterness takes hold and is allowed to grow, it can set in and defile an entire community. 00:10:15.139 --> 00:10:26.679 So when you think about unresolved conflict or unaddressed sin or resentment or bitterness, think of them like toxic waste. 00:10:27.779 --> 00:10:28.279 Right? 00:10:28.279 --> 00:10:30.679 And what do we do with toxic waste? 00:10:30.720 --> 00:10:37.000 We have a very specific process for disposing of it so that we don't impact the ecosystem. 00:10:37.319 --> 00:10:38.620 These are very much the same thing. 00:10:38.679 --> 00:10:46.319 If we don't have a process to dispose of things like bitterness and resentment, they will have a toxic effect on the entire ecosystem. 00:10:46.759 --> 00:10:48.819 And so the Bible says take this very seriously. 00:10:49.059 --> 00:10:52.759 You have to handle this with great care because the whole community is in danger. 00:10:52.759 --> 00:10:55.759 So that's the first reason forgiveness is necessary. 00:10:55.860 --> 00:10:56.659 The second is this. 00:10:57.179 --> 00:11:00.460 Forgiveness is evidence of your relationship with God. 00:11:00.559 --> 00:11:04.580 It's evidence of the quality or the kind of relationship that you have with God. 00:11:04.580 --> 00:11:13.900 In the parable, the king has this servant brought to him who owes him this extraordinary debt. 00:11:13.980 --> 00:11:15.080 We'll get more into that later. 00:11:15.879 --> 00:11:20.580 And the king is going to sell him and his family all to pay back the debt. 00:11:20.680 --> 00:11:23.660 And the servant begs for forgiveness and the king grants it. 00:11:25.020 --> 00:11:26.879 Huge, huge act of forgiveness. 00:11:26.879 --> 00:11:36.759 And then the servant goes out and instead of that act of forgiveness changing the servant and making the servant himself more forgiving in his own life, 00:11:37.299 --> 00:11:39.019 we see that the servant goes out. 00:11:39.279 --> 00:11:46.220 He encounters somebody who owes him a small sum of money and he's hardened and he's almost cruel. 00:11:47.080 --> 00:11:47.279 Right? 00:11:47.399 --> 00:11:49.360 He actually chokes the man. 00:11:49.360 --> 00:11:59.759 So there's bitterness and anger and, you know, you can almost imagine that he's been stewing on this debt maybe for years. 00:12:00.300 --> 00:12:08.120 You know, and then he finally sees the servant and he's like, and all that anger comes out and he grabs him and he throttles him and he has him thrown in prison. 00:12:08.600 --> 00:12:08.800 Right? 00:12:09.340 --> 00:12:13.240 And so then the king hears about this and the king brings the servant back and says, 00:12:13.320 --> 00:12:16.580 I showed you great mercy, but you didn't show mercy and therefore what does he do? 00:12:16.580 --> 00:12:19.720 He has him taken and given to the jailers. 00:12:19.860 --> 00:12:21.400 But that's a nice translation. 00:12:22.200 --> 00:12:24.620 The word actually means tormentors. 00:12:25.280 --> 00:12:27.400 He gives him over to the tormentors. 00:12:28.420 --> 00:12:31.520 And just so that we can't wiggle out of it, 00:12:32.960 --> 00:12:38.000 Jesus then makes sure that we, he, it's almost as though he's spelling it out like you would for a child. 00:12:38.060 --> 00:12:39.660 He says, this is a metaphor. 00:12:40.800 --> 00:12:43.020 And what I'm actually saying is this. 00:12:43.019 --> 00:12:50.740 My heavenly father will do the same thing to you if you do not forgive your brother from your heart. 00:12:51.740 --> 00:12:54.360 And so you read this and, and, and the point it's making is this. 00:12:54.439 --> 00:12:59.659 People who refuse to give, to forgive are headed for eternal torment. 00:13:01.980 --> 00:13:06.819 And you read this and, you know, it's amazing what the commentators try to do to kind of nuance this. 00:13:06.820 --> 00:13:14.840 You know, and it's, and it's amazingly tempting to want to kind of say, well, what, this is really a metaphor for the relationship between Israel and the larger Roman Empire. 00:13:14.980 --> 00:13:17.440 And, you know, just kind of, but that's not what's going on. 00:13:18.280 --> 00:13:20.060 Jesus is clearly making a statement here. 00:13:21.240 --> 00:13:22.660 Now, what he's not saying is this. 00:13:22.700 --> 00:13:25.800 He's not saying that forgiving others is a way that we earn God's forgiveness. 00:13:26.800 --> 00:13:27.840 You could read it that way. 00:13:27.920 --> 00:13:31.740 That's not, that's not true because it doesn't line up with any of what the rest of scripture says. 00:13:31.740 --> 00:13:40.480 One of the best ways to know that your interpretation is, is along the right lines is if it, in any way, if it, does it, does it reinforce what the rest of scripture says? 00:13:40.600 --> 00:13:43.060 Or does it challenge or contradict what the rest of scripture says? 00:13:43.440 --> 00:13:45.100 And we know that that wouldn't be correct. 00:13:45.779 --> 00:13:53.039 As we say every week, for Christians, our relationship with God is not based on what we do for God, but what God has done for us, right? 00:13:53.539 --> 00:13:54.600 Through Jesus Christ. 00:13:55.139 --> 00:13:56.919 But what this is saying is this. 00:13:57.220 --> 00:13:59.019 It's, it's, it's kind of a spiritual principle. 00:13:59.419 --> 00:14:00.799 And here's the principle of the parable. 00:14:01.740 --> 00:14:11.039 The degree to which we believe that we have been forgiven by God and that we needed that forgiveness is the degree to which we will forgive others. 00:14:12.039 --> 00:14:18.379 The degree to which we believe that we have truly been forgiven by God is the degree to which we will forgive others. 00:14:18.460 --> 00:14:19.200 It's a barometer. 00:14:21.560 --> 00:14:30.039 So if you're a Christian and you say, I believe that I, that, that God has forgiven me and Jesus forgiven my sin, that he's reconciled me to himself and that makes me a Christian. 00:14:30.039 --> 00:14:35.419 And yet there is no evidence of a willingness to forgive in your life at all. 00:14:36.759 --> 00:14:44.019 That you hold on to, you know, anger and bitterness and resentment and you refuse to forgive and you, you, you only want to see justice done and you want to, you want payback. 00:14:44.019 --> 00:14:49.059 Then what this would say is you need to question your relationship with God. 00:14:49.139 --> 00:14:54.559 What that's really about is do you really believe, was there ever a point when you actually believed you needed the forgiveness? 00:14:54.860 --> 00:14:56.779 Or are you just saying the words? 00:14:56.779 --> 00:15:04.779 So our willingness to forgive others is evidence of the genuineness of our relationship with God based on his forgiveness of us. 00:15:07.159 --> 00:15:12.319 So forgiveness is necessary because it's, it one, it's necessary for the health of the community. 00:15:12.899 --> 00:15:17.519 And two, it's necessary because it's evidence of the actual quality of our relationship with God. 00:15:17.639 --> 00:15:18.720 Is it genuine or not? 00:15:18.720 --> 00:15:21.800 So that's why it's necessary. 00:15:22.019 --> 00:15:25.460 That leads us to the second question is, as we talk about forgiveness, what is it? 00:15:25.519 --> 00:15:26.540 What does forgiveness require? 00:15:27.240 --> 00:15:31.060 And this parable shows us that there are actually four parts to genuine forgiveness. 00:15:31.480 --> 00:15:32.899 And there are four necessary parts. 00:15:33.120 --> 00:15:37.500 One of the nice things about this parable is the king shows us exactly what forgiveness looks like. 00:15:37.500 --> 00:15:41.700 In verses 24 to 27, you see the king do four things. 00:15:41.820 --> 00:15:43.860 First, the king recognizes the wrong. 00:15:45.259 --> 00:15:46.639 Then the king takes pity. 00:15:47.620 --> 00:15:49.039 And then he cancels the debt. 00:15:49.179 --> 00:15:50.419 And then he lets the man go. 00:15:51.100 --> 00:15:52.720 So I want to look at each of those four things. 00:15:52.840 --> 00:15:57.340 The first thing that we see here, the first kind of where forgiveness begins, is this. 00:15:57.559 --> 00:16:00.539 And this is something that we mostly can skip over. 00:16:01.679 --> 00:16:03.559 It's so easy to not do this. 00:16:03.879 --> 00:16:06.700 And yet I don't believe that true forgiveness is possible unless we do this. 00:16:07.500 --> 00:16:10.740 The first thing the king does is he identifies the wrong. 00:16:11.559 --> 00:16:13.340 And in the parable, the wrong is what? 00:16:13.379 --> 00:16:14.759 What's the wrong that's been done? 00:16:15.279 --> 00:16:17.559 The servant owes the king 10,000 talents. 00:16:18.840 --> 00:16:20.179 It's a huge sum of money. 00:16:21.120 --> 00:16:24.639 And the king is very clear on how much is owed him. 00:16:25.679 --> 00:16:27.740 The king isn't kind of cloudy on the debt. 00:16:28.399 --> 00:16:32.759 The king knows exactly, probably down to the penny, exactly what the debt is. 00:16:33.179 --> 00:16:34.620 Because it's a huge sum of money. 00:16:34.620 --> 00:16:39.240 This is the kind of sum of money that might put the king's kingdom in jeopardy. 00:16:39.580 --> 00:16:40.419 It's that much money. 00:16:42.799 --> 00:16:44.700 The king's very clear on how much is owed. 00:16:45.620 --> 00:16:50.560 And this thing, this need to be clear on the debt is essential for true forgiveness. 00:16:50.700 --> 00:16:59.680 In other words, you must be able to honestly and accurately name the hurt or the wrong or the debt that has been created in your life. 00:16:59.679 --> 00:17:02.339 Because we all have default tendencies. 00:17:02.539 --> 00:17:03.959 I mean, think about the last time you were hurt. 00:17:04.099 --> 00:17:06.700 Think about the last time that somebody wronged you or let you down. 00:17:07.179 --> 00:17:09.700 We all have default tendencies, right? 00:17:10.059 --> 00:17:11.599 Some of us tend to be minimizers. 00:17:12.519 --> 00:17:16.599 Somebody does something that's hurtful and your immediate gut reaction is to say, oh, don't worry about it. 00:17:16.619 --> 00:17:17.139 No big deal. 00:17:17.220 --> 00:17:18.079 I totally understand. 00:17:18.379 --> 00:17:19.519 I know you were just tired that day. 00:17:19.559 --> 00:17:20.319 I know you were just upset. 00:17:20.519 --> 00:17:21.099 It's no big deal. 00:17:21.200 --> 00:17:21.460 Really? 00:17:21.659 --> 00:17:22.399 I really don't care. 00:17:22.480 --> 00:17:22.960 It's no big deal. 00:17:23.019 --> 00:17:23.419 No big deal. 00:17:23.420 --> 00:17:25.340 That's minimizing, right? 00:17:26.220 --> 00:17:31.340 Even if it really hurt you, you find the words tumbling out of your mouth, you know? 00:17:31.600 --> 00:17:35.519 Maybe somebody stood you up and you sat there waiting for, you know, three hours and they never came. 00:17:36.500 --> 00:17:39.620 And they come back and say, oh, man, I'm sorry. 00:17:39.779 --> 00:17:40.440 Oh, it's no big deal. 00:17:40.500 --> 00:17:41.279 No big deal, right? 00:17:42.700 --> 00:17:44.380 Other people, so those are minimizers. 00:17:44.620 --> 00:17:46.500 We, others of us, have the opposite tendency. 00:17:46.620 --> 00:17:47.519 We're kind of maximizers. 00:17:48.180 --> 00:17:51.720 You know, you can kind of find a reason to be offended in almost every situation. 00:17:51.720 --> 00:17:55.680 You tend to read situations in ways that are hurtful to you. 00:17:56.120 --> 00:17:58.680 You tend to assume the worst about other people's motives. 00:17:59.160 --> 00:18:05.480 If something happens and it's ambiguous as to exactly what was going on, you will tend to interpret it in a way that is most hurtful to you. 00:18:06.420 --> 00:18:08.220 You can tend to blow things out of proportion. 00:18:08.380 --> 00:18:11.039 You can tend toward the dramatic, right? 00:18:11.220 --> 00:18:14.160 So we all have our tendencies in ways that this becomes distorted. 00:18:15.360 --> 00:18:20.259 And so forgiveness, true forgiveness begins when we have an accurate assessment and we can name the hurt that's done. 00:18:20.259 --> 00:18:25.160 Without minimizing it, without blowing it out of proportion, naming it for what it is, right? 00:18:25.220 --> 00:18:26.299 You've got to name the debt. 00:18:27.099 --> 00:18:27.660 Recognize it. 00:18:29.180 --> 00:18:30.660 The second step is this. 00:18:30.740 --> 00:18:38.299 Once you've named it, once you're aware of the hurt and are able to name it and identify it as best you can, take pity. 00:18:40.660 --> 00:18:41.319 Take pity. 00:18:41.319 --> 00:18:45.599 The word here is actually pretty fascinating. 00:18:45.740 --> 00:18:49.939 The Greek word literally means that your heart goes out to somebody. 00:18:52.299 --> 00:18:58.039 It actually refers to your bowels, but in the Greek world that referred to your, that was kind of like talking about your heart. 00:18:58.119 --> 00:18:59.879 The seed of your love, the seed of your emotions. 00:19:00.339 --> 00:19:03.419 That being stirred or moved or even going out to somebody. 00:19:03.420 --> 00:19:03.460 Empathy. 00:19:05.519 --> 00:19:07.340 So what we're talking about is what? 00:19:07.640 --> 00:19:08.000 Empathy. 00:19:09.000 --> 00:19:09.720 That's what we're talking about. 00:19:09.779 --> 00:19:10.060 Empathy. 00:19:11.140 --> 00:19:13.140 Knowing, being able to identify with somebody. 00:19:13.279 --> 00:19:15.160 Being able to know what it's like to be them. 00:19:15.240 --> 00:19:18.500 Being able to imagine what they must feel like in their situation. 00:19:19.920 --> 00:19:24.100 So when somebody hurts or wrongs you, the temptation is to do a couple of things. 00:19:24.600 --> 00:19:28.060 You know, first the temptation is to over-focus on your own victimhood. 00:19:29.080 --> 00:19:29.480 Right? 00:19:30.080 --> 00:19:31.400 You kind of stew on it. 00:19:31.400 --> 00:19:35.019 You stew on how bad you were wronged. 00:19:35.019 --> 00:19:37.640 Which can lead to self-pity and it can lead to bitterness. 00:19:38.280 --> 00:19:38.460 Right? 00:19:39.720 --> 00:19:44.620 And you stew on how wrong it was and how egregious it was and you can't believe that they did that to you. 00:19:44.700 --> 00:19:46.420 And you just kind of like meditate on that. 00:19:47.940 --> 00:19:52.000 That's the first temptation is to kind of exaggerate your victimhood. 00:19:52.800 --> 00:19:56.580 The other temptation that comes along with that is to dehumanize the perpetrator. 00:19:56.579 --> 00:20:03.579 You see them less and less and less in your mind as you think about it and relive the events again and again and again. 00:20:03.899 --> 00:20:06.799 They cease to become a three-dimensional flesh and blood human being. 00:20:07.159 --> 00:20:10.720 And more and more and more they become a one-dimensional cardboard cutout of a person. 00:20:11.579 --> 00:20:13.980 Defined pretty much exclusively by the wrong. 00:20:13.980 --> 00:20:19.740 They become not just a person who's morally, you know, ambiguous and good and bad and a mix. 00:20:20.079 --> 00:20:21.299 But somebody who's evil. 00:20:22.880 --> 00:20:27.960 In other words, when somebody hurts us, I think the temptation is to widen the gap between us and them. 00:20:28.460 --> 00:20:28.720 You know? 00:20:29.599 --> 00:20:32.079 We imagine ourselves ten foot high in a pulpit. 00:20:32.759 --> 00:20:35.079 And we imagine them kind of groveling down on the ground. 00:20:35.819 --> 00:20:36.120 You know? 00:20:36.119 --> 00:20:39.639 And we look at them from our place of self-righteous victimhood. 00:20:42.579 --> 00:20:46.079 Miroslav Volf, who's written a lot about this, says this. 00:20:46.139 --> 00:20:46.439 He says, 00:20:47.119 --> 00:20:51.759 Forgiveness flounders because I exclude the enemy from the community of humans, 00:20:52.479 --> 00:20:55.459 even as I exclude myself from the community of sinners. 00:20:58.079 --> 00:20:59.359 That's a brilliant quote. 00:21:00.059 --> 00:21:03.879 Forgiveness flounders because I exclude the enemy from the community of humans, 00:21:03.880 --> 00:21:08.160 even as I exclude myself from the community of sinners. 00:21:10.140 --> 00:21:14.320 Jesus is saying forgiveness requires us to close that gap. 00:21:15.260 --> 00:21:19.040 It requires us to send our hearts out to the person, 00:21:19.140 --> 00:21:23.780 to have compassion for, to identify with the person who has wronged us. 00:21:25.040 --> 00:21:28.000 And to do it to the point where we can see that even though, 00:21:28.920 --> 00:21:30.640 even though we have been wronged, 00:21:30.640 --> 00:21:33.160 and even though in this particular situation I was sinned against, 00:21:33.160 --> 00:21:34.279 I'm also a sinner. 00:21:36.279 --> 00:21:40.000 And we do it to the point where we realize that even though this perpetrator 00:21:40.000 --> 00:21:42.000 may have brought great evil against us, 00:21:42.360 --> 00:21:43.920 he or she is still a human being. 00:21:44.680 --> 00:21:45.700 I'm still a sinner. 00:21:47.120 --> 00:21:48.400 They're still a human being. 00:21:48.900 --> 00:21:50.960 And in fact, as much as I hate to admit it, 00:21:51.140 --> 00:21:53.620 we have much more in common than I would like to admit. 00:21:55.279 --> 00:21:56.720 We have to close the gap 00:21:56.720 --> 00:22:00.080 by sending our heart out to be with them. 00:22:00.079 --> 00:22:02.319 Now, this does not mean, 00:22:02.399 --> 00:22:06.500 this does not mean that we deny the evil that has been done against us, right? 00:22:06.699 --> 00:22:08.439 It doesn't, again, we don't minimize that. 00:22:09.099 --> 00:22:12.159 If you've been seriously hurt or you've been seriously abused, 00:22:12.480 --> 00:22:14.240 and I know some of you, your stories, 00:22:14.379 --> 00:22:15.079 and I know that you have. 00:22:16.159 --> 00:22:18.659 I know some of you have had experiences like that, 00:22:18.740 --> 00:22:19.819 and I don't know about it. 00:22:19.819 --> 00:22:20.859 Maybe nobody knows about it. 00:22:21.500 --> 00:22:24.419 But if you've been seriously hurt or abused or wronged in your life, 00:22:24.420 --> 00:22:27.900 those actions are evil. 00:22:29.100 --> 00:22:29.880 They're wicked. 00:22:30.700 --> 00:22:32.420 And so being able to, as we said before, 00:22:32.640 --> 00:22:34.660 name and pronounce them as being evil 00:22:34.660 --> 00:22:36.519 is a part of what forgiveness requires. 00:22:37.480 --> 00:22:38.539 So I'm not saying that, 00:22:38.580 --> 00:22:39.539 but what I am saying is 00:22:39.539 --> 00:22:41.720 you have to strive and do the hard work 00:22:41.720 --> 00:22:44.660 of sending your heart out past the evil, 00:22:44.880 --> 00:22:46.800 down, down, down, into that person 00:22:46.800 --> 00:22:48.500 until you find their humanness. 00:22:48.840 --> 00:22:50.320 Until you're able to recognize 00:22:50.319 --> 00:22:51.899 that on some deep level, 00:22:52.200 --> 00:22:52.939 you are the same. 00:22:54.139 --> 00:22:55.079 That you're the same. 00:22:56.039 --> 00:22:58.000 That there is a commonality between you 00:22:58.000 --> 00:22:59.439 that you can identify with them. 00:22:59.859 --> 00:23:00.779 So you have pity. 00:23:01.159 --> 00:23:01.839 You have empathy. 00:23:01.980 --> 00:23:02.720 You cultivate empathy. 00:23:03.000 --> 00:23:04.259 This can take years 00:23:04.259 --> 00:23:07.240 to cultivate even a shred of empathy 00:23:07.240 --> 00:23:09.059 for somebody who has wronged you. 00:23:10.859 --> 00:23:11.879 That's the second thing. 00:23:12.000 --> 00:23:12.980 The third thing, 00:23:13.079 --> 00:23:14.319 once you've named the wrong, 00:23:14.399 --> 00:23:15.339 once you've identified it, 00:23:15.559 --> 00:23:16.819 and once you have begun to be able 00:23:16.819 --> 00:23:18.399 to cultivate some degree of empathy, 00:23:18.400 --> 00:23:20.680 then you cancel the debt. 00:23:22.000 --> 00:23:23.000 You cancel the debt. 00:23:25.100 --> 00:23:27.019 Once you've been able to get to this point, 00:23:27.440 --> 00:23:28.259 you have to recognize 00:23:28.259 --> 00:23:30.200 that whenever there is a wrong done, 00:23:30.340 --> 00:23:31.680 there's a debt that has to be paid. 00:23:32.380 --> 00:23:33.380 Whenever there's a wrong done, 00:23:33.440 --> 00:23:34.540 there's a debt that has to be paid. 00:23:36.180 --> 00:23:37.540 So if I borrow your car 00:23:37.540 --> 00:23:39.040 and I take it out and I wreck it, 00:23:39.740 --> 00:23:42.440 there's a debt that has to be paid. 00:23:43.019 --> 00:23:44.220 And either I'm going to pay it 00:23:44.220 --> 00:23:45.200 and get the car repaired, 00:23:45.580 --> 00:23:46.519 or you're going to pay it 00:23:46.519 --> 00:23:47.480 and get the car repaired. 00:23:47.480 --> 00:23:48.779 But somebody has to pay. 00:23:49.720 --> 00:23:50.339 And you say, 00:23:50.420 --> 00:23:52.339 well, what if nobody has the car repaired? 00:23:53.200 --> 00:23:54.839 Well, still the damage has been done 00:23:54.839 --> 00:23:56.500 and the value of the car 00:23:56.500 --> 00:23:57.500 has been decreased 00:23:57.500 --> 00:23:58.539 because of that damage. 00:24:00.519 --> 00:24:01.940 And if I don't pay you, 00:24:02.000 --> 00:24:02.779 then you have to just 00:24:02.779 --> 00:24:04.220 incur that debt yourself. 00:24:05.680 --> 00:24:07.279 It's a loss that you have to bear. 00:24:08.539 --> 00:24:10.299 And this is what forgiveness means. 00:24:10.440 --> 00:24:11.120 Forgiveness means 00:24:11.120 --> 00:24:12.819 that you pay the debt 00:24:12.819 --> 00:24:15.039 on behalf of the perpetrator 00:24:15.039 --> 00:24:16.160 as a gift to them. 00:24:16.160 --> 00:24:19.279 That you take the debt 00:24:19.279 --> 00:24:20.259 that is owed you 00:24:20.259 --> 00:24:23.300 and you transform it into a gift. 00:24:24.320 --> 00:24:25.720 That's really what forgiveness is. 00:24:25.779 --> 00:24:27.240 It's transforming a debt 00:24:27.240 --> 00:24:28.100 into a gift. 00:24:29.120 --> 00:24:29.800 Transforming something 00:24:29.800 --> 00:24:30.840 that is owed you 00:24:30.840 --> 00:24:32.300 into something that you give. 00:24:34.960 --> 00:24:36.460 And this is the same 00:24:36.460 --> 00:24:37.519 with emotional hurt, 00:24:37.580 --> 00:24:38.600 which is far more common. 00:24:40.019 --> 00:24:41.080 Someone says or does 00:24:41.080 --> 00:24:42.120 something hurtful to you, 00:24:42.720 --> 00:24:43.759 they're still the same choice. 00:24:43.759 --> 00:24:46.599 Either you make them pay 00:24:46.599 --> 00:24:49.259 or you pay it on their behalf. 00:24:51.379 --> 00:24:53.059 It's very tempting and easy 00:24:53.059 --> 00:24:54.519 to want to make that person pay. 00:24:54.940 --> 00:24:55.680 And how do we do that? 00:24:55.740 --> 00:24:56.680 Well, all kinds of ways. 00:24:56.779 --> 00:24:58.180 We're all very creative at this. 00:24:59.279 --> 00:25:01.759 You can maybe say 00:25:01.759 --> 00:25:03.079 directly hurtful things 00:25:03.079 --> 00:25:04.920 or use sarcasm. 00:25:05.920 --> 00:25:07.920 Or you can emotionally withdraw 00:25:07.920 --> 00:25:09.180 and cut that person off. 00:25:09.180 --> 00:25:11.960 Maybe you can treat them like dirt. 00:25:12.960 --> 00:25:14.100 Or maybe you slander them 00:25:14.100 --> 00:25:14.740 to other people. 00:25:15.220 --> 00:25:16.940 Now, you're not going to actually 00:25:16.940 --> 00:25:18.240 go out and directly say, 00:25:18.440 --> 00:25:19.740 listen, I'm getting ready 00:25:19.740 --> 00:25:20.560 to slander somebody. 00:25:20.740 --> 00:25:21.340 Get ready. 00:25:22.080 --> 00:25:22.860 What you'll do is 00:25:22.860 --> 00:25:23.860 you'll go to your small group 00:25:23.860 --> 00:25:24.299 and you'll say, 00:25:24.420 --> 00:25:25.500 guys, I need to process 00:25:25.500 --> 00:25:26.259 something with you. 00:25:27.100 --> 00:25:27.860 I need to process 00:25:27.860 --> 00:25:29.080 this relationship with you. 00:25:29.560 --> 00:25:31.220 Can I just process this with you? 00:25:31.299 --> 00:25:32.320 Because I want to be authentic 00:25:32.320 --> 00:25:33.259 and I want to be transparent. 00:25:33.440 --> 00:25:34.660 So let me just process this with you. 00:25:34.799 --> 00:25:35.940 And I just want to get your feedback. 00:25:36.680 --> 00:25:37.420 And then you'll rip 00:25:37.420 --> 00:25:38.500 that person to shreds. 00:25:38.900 --> 00:25:39.840 And what you want to do 00:25:39.840 --> 00:25:40.700 is you want to, 00:25:41.279 --> 00:25:42.680 when we do that, 00:25:42.720 --> 00:25:43.420 if we're really honest, 00:25:43.480 --> 00:25:44.220 what are we trying to do? 00:25:44.360 --> 00:25:45.680 We're trying to get the people 00:25:45.680 --> 00:25:46.340 that are listening 00:25:46.340 --> 00:25:48.360 to hate that person 00:25:48.360 --> 00:25:49.259 as much as we do. 00:25:50.340 --> 00:25:51.640 And the minute you get somebody 00:25:51.640 --> 00:25:51.940 to say, 00:25:52.000 --> 00:25:53.519 I can't believe they did that to you. 00:25:53.759 --> 00:25:54.380 Man, what a jerk. 00:25:54.440 --> 00:25:55.180 I can't believe that. 00:25:55.240 --> 00:25:56.400 That's crazy. 00:25:57.519 --> 00:25:58.340 You feel better. 00:25:59.160 --> 00:26:00.220 It vindicates you. 00:26:00.680 --> 00:26:01.080 Because you're like, 00:26:01.080 --> 00:26:01.980 I got somebody else 00:26:01.980 --> 00:26:02.980 on my side now. 00:26:03.680 --> 00:26:04.640 And so we can go around 00:26:04.640 --> 00:26:05.620 in the name of authenticity 00:26:05.620 --> 00:26:06.340 and transparency 00:26:06.339 --> 00:26:07.179 and processing 00:26:07.179 --> 00:26:08.159 and emotional honesty 00:26:08.159 --> 00:26:08.879 and all that stuff. 00:26:09.079 --> 00:26:10.659 Just recruiting people. 00:26:11.299 --> 00:26:11.419 Right? 00:26:11.759 --> 00:26:13.019 Recruiting fellow haters. 00:26:13.859 --> 00:26:14.519 Building a club 00:26:14.519 --> 00:26:15.679 around a person we don't like. 00:26:17.599 --> 00:26:18.720 And all the while, 00:26:18.819 --> 00:26:20.119 you're making that person pay. 00:26:20.740 --> 00:26:21.159 You're right? 00:26:21.619 --> 00:26:23.379 Or you can just fantasize 00:26:23.379 --> 00:26:24.379 and take pleasure 00:26:24.379 --> 00:26:25.319 at their misfortune. 00:26:26.119 --> 00:26:27.179 Or you can maybe 00:26:27.179 --> 00:26:27.919 just sit around, 00:26:29.199 --> 00:26:30.319 drinking your wine, 00:26:31.459 --> 00:26:32.319 fantasizing about 00:26:32.319 --> 00:26:33.299 all the hurtful things 00:26:33.299 --> 00:26:33.919 that you're going to say 00:26:33.919 --> 00:26:34.879 the next time you see them. 00:26:34.880 --> 00:26:36.780 That zinger that you can't wait 00:26:36.780 --> 00:26:38.160 to just nail them to the floor. 00:26:39.200 --> 00:26:40.680 But in all these different ways, 00:26:41.400 --> 00:26:42.380 we can choose 00:26:42.380 --> 00:26:43.720 to make that person pay. 00:26:44.580 --> 00:26:45.720 The other option 00:26:45.720 --> 00:26:46.600 is much harder. 00:26:46.720 --> 00:26:47.800 And that is that we pay. 00:26:48.820 --> 00:26:49.260 In other words, 00:26:49.380 --> 00:26:50.440 every time a wave, 00:26:50.760 --> 00:26:51.740 and have you ever noticed 00:26:51.740 --> 00:26:53.900 the times that I've been 00:26:53.900 --> 00:26:54.940 really hurt in my life, 00:26:55.860 --> 00:26:56.400 and there's actually 00:26:56.400 --> 00:26:57.240 even been a relationship 00:26:57.240 --> 00:26:58.220 over the last few years 00:26:58.220 --> 00:26:59.200 that has been really difficult, 00:26:59.360 --> 00:26:59.900 one that's required 00:26:59.900 --> 00:27:00.600 a lot of forgiveness. 00:27:00.599 --> 00:27:02.579 And that hurt 00:27:02.579 --> 00:27:03.899 doesn't come all at once. 00:27:04.119 --> 00:27:05.179 It comes in waves. 00:27:06.079 --> 00:27:07.839 So it hurts almost unbearably, 00:27:08.000 --> 00:27:08.959 and then it'll subside. 00:27:09.139 --> 00:27:10.119 And it hurts again, 00:27:10.299 --> 00:27:11.079 and it's like waves 00:27:11.079 --> 00:27:12.019 crashing on the beach. 00:27:13.240 --> 00:27:14.279 And when you choose 00:27:14.279 --> 00:27:15.439 to pay an emotional debt, 00:27:15.500 --> 00:27:15.919 when you choose 00:27:15.919 --> 00:27:16.779 to forgive somebody 00:27:16.779 --> 00:27:17.859 what they owe you, 00:27:18.459 --> 00:27:19.500 it means that every time 00:27:19.500 --> 00:27:20.319 a wave breaks 00:27:20.319 --> 00:27:21.379 on the shore of your heart, 00:27:21.879 --> 00:27:23.379 you choose to absorb it. 00:27:25.240 --> 00:27:26.279 You absorb it. 00:27:26.519 --> 00:27:27.579 You take it into yourself. 00:27:28.579 --> 00:27:29.619 You incur the debt. 00:27:31.119 --> 00:27:32.559 It means that when people 00:27:32.559 --> 00:27:33.599 who are not involved 00:27:33.599 --> 00:27:34.599 and shouldn't be involved 00:27:34.599 --> 00:27:36.079 try to ask you questions 00:27:36.079 --> 00:27:37.259 and get you to talk about it, 00:27:38.119 --> 00:27:38.960 you don't. 00:27:39.359 --> 00:27:39.960 You refuse. 00:27:40.579 --> 00:27:41.579 It means when your heart 00:27:41.579 --> 00:27:42.039 or your mind 00:27:42.039 --> 00:27:43.179 is tempted to fantasize 00:27:43.179 --> 00:27:45.119 about the nasty things 00:27:45.119 --> 00:27:46.039 you might say to them 00:27:46.039 --> 00:27:48.460 or the, you know, 00:27:48.539 --> 00:27:50.059 if you are tempted 00:27:50.059 --> 00:27:50.939 to kind of glory 00:27:50.939 --> 00:27:51.919 and misfortune 00:27:51.919 --> 00:27:52.859 that they may be experiencing 00:27:52.859 --> 00:27:53.439 in their life, 00:27:53.699 --> 00:27:54.939 you simply flip the switch 00:27:54.939 --> 00:27:56.339 and you decide not to. 00:27:57.579 --> 00:27:59.419 It means that when you do 00:27:59.419 --> 00:28:00.879 and if you do process 00:28:00.879 --> 00:28:03.220 these kinds of things 00:28:03.220 --> 00:28:03.819 with friends, 00:28:04.159 --> 00:28:05.559 you do it in a way 00:28:05.559 --> 00:28:06.859 that honors the perpetrator. 00:28:09.500 --> 00:28:10.839 It doesn't feel good 00:28:10.839 --> 00:28:11.960 to do this, okay? 00:28:12.399 --> 00:28:13.819 It doesn't feel good. 00:28:14.159 --> 00:28:15.139 It feels much better 00:28:15.139 --> 00:28:16.379 to make the other person pay. 00:28:17.319 --> 00:28:18.299 But there's a problem 00:28:18.299 --> 00:28:19.079 with doing that. 00:28:20.039 --> 00:28:20.639 Frederick Buechner 00:28:20.639 --> 00:28:21.279 says it well. 00:28:21.359 --> 00:28:21.740 He says, 00:28:22.579 --> 00:28:24.359 of the seven deadly sins, 00:28:24.539 --> 00:28:25.679 anger is possibly 00:28:25.679 --> 00:28:26.559 the most fun. 00:28:27.579 --> 00:28:28.839 Listen to this. 00:28:28.919 --> 00:28:29.159 He says, 00:28:29.419 --> 00:28:30.419 to lick your wounds, 00:28:30.879 --> 00:28:31.980 to smack your lips 00:28:31.980 --> 00:28:33.740 over grievances long past, 00:28:34.359 --> 00:28:35.839 to roll over your tongue 00:28:35.839 --> 00:28:36.460 the prospect 00:28:36.460 --> 00:28:37.939 of bitter confrontations 00:28:37.939 --> 00:28:38.819 still to come, 00:28:39.199 --> 00:28:40.539 to savor to the last 00:28:40.539 --> 00:28:41.599 toothsome morsel 00:28:41.599 --> 00:28:43.159 both the pain you were given 00:28:43.159 --> 00:28:44.639 and the pain you were giving back. 00:28:45.000 --> 00:28:45.759 In many ways, 00:28:45.859 --> 00:28:47.399 it is a feast fit for a king. 00:28:48.199 --> 00:28:49.399 The chief drawback 00:28:49.399 --> 00:28:50.939 is that what you were wolfing down 00:28:50.939 --> 00:28:51.720 is yourself. 00:28:53.139 --> 00:28:54.919 The skeleton at the feast 00:28:54.919 --> 00:28:56.159 is you. 00:28:56.160 --> 00:28:59.019 In other words, 00:28:59.680 --> 00:29:00.920 it may feel good, 00:29:01.040 --> 00:29:02.580 but we are devouring ourselves 00:29:02.580 --> 00:29:05.320 if we hold on to things 00:29:05.320 --> 00:29:06.300 like bitterness and resentment. 00:29:06.620 --> 00:29:07.800 Making the perpetrator pay 00:29:07.800 --> 00:29:08.540 feels good, 00:29:08.640 --> 00:29:10.200 but it will destroy us eventually. 00:29:10.340 --> 00:29:11.640 It will consume us. 00:29:12.960 --> 00:29:14.920 Forgiveness is an extremely hard road, 00:29:15.160 --> 00:29:16.060 but that is the road 00:29:16.060 --> 00:29:16.960 that paradoxically 00:29:16.960 --> 00:29:18.220 will ultimately set you free. 00:29:18.220 --> 00:29:21.180 So, 00:29:21.380 --> 00:29:23.160 the reality is 00:29:23.160 --> 00:29:26.200 forgiveness requires 00:29:26.200 --> 00:29:29.440 that we commit to forgiveness 00:29:29.440 --> 00:29:31.039 long before we feel it. 00:29:32.160 --> 00:29:32.400 Okay? 00:29:33.240 --> 00:29:33.740 So, 00:29:33.819 --> 00:29:35.039 if you're thinking about a situation 00:29:35.039 --> 00:29:36.000 in your life right now 00:29:36.000 --> 00:29:36.519 and you're wondering 00:29:36.519 --> 00:29:38.160 how am I going to possibly do this 00:29:38.160 --> 00:29:39.819 and you can't imagine 00:29:39.819 --> 00:29:40.579 feeling that way, 00:29:40.640 --> 00:29:40.720 well, 00:29:40.740 --> 00:29:41.440 the answer is 00:29:41.440 --> 00:29:43.259 forgiveness is a choice you make 00:29:43.259 --> 00:29:44.900 sometimes 00:29:44.900 --> 00:29:46.440 years and years and years 00:29:46.440 --> 00:29:47.579 before you ever feel it. 00:29:48.439 --> 00:29:49.419 You choose it. 00:29:49.619 --> 00:29:50.379 You commit to it. 00:29:52.819 --> 00:29:53.819 Emotional forgiveness, 00:29:53.960 --> 00:29:55.259 the emotional reality forgiveness 00:29:55.259 --> 00:29:56.539 is like a distant land. 00:29:57.279 --> 00:29:58.579 And sometimes all you can do 00:29:58.579 --> 00:29:59.460 is buy a ticket 00:29:59.460 --> 00:30:01.179 and get on the train. 00:30:02.259 --> 00:30:03.339 And you buy the ticket 00:30:03.339 --> 00:30:04.259 and you get on the train 00:30:04.259 --> 00:30:05.259 and you start the journey. 00:30:05.259 --> 00:30:07.359 And your choice to forgive 00:30:07.359 --> 00:30:08.319 is buying the ticket. 00:30:08.900 --> 00:30:10.240 But the reality of forgiveness 00:30:10.240 --> 00:30:12.019 is a long ways off. 00:30:12.519 --> 00:30:13.940 And it may be a long train ride 00:30:13.940 --> 00:30:14.279 for you. 00:30:15.920 --> 00:30:17.279 But all you can do right now 00:30:17.279 --> 00:30:18.220 is get on the train 00:30:18.220 --> 00:30:20.099 and wait and trust 00:30:20.099 --> 00:30:21.240 that eventually the tracks 00:30:21.240 --> 00:30:22.480 will lead you there. 00:30:24.839 --> 00:30:26.019 I want to also say 00:30:26.019 --> 00:30:27.059 that this is not the same 00:30:27.059 --> 00:30:27.759 as reconciliation. 00:30:29.000 --> 00:30:29.859 Because reconciliation 00:30:29.859 --> 00:30:31.660 is a two-way rebuilding 00:30:31.660 --> 00:30:32.460 of a relationship 00:30:32.460 --> 00:30:34.220 that requires both people. 00:30:35.000 --> 00:30:35.580 But forgiveness 00:30:35.580 --> 00:30:36.880 is something that you can do 00:30:36.880 --> 00:30:38.040 in your own heart. 00:30:39.500 --> 00:30:40.640 There's a time and a place, 00:30:40.740 --> 00:30:40.960 I think, 00:30:41.019 --> 00:30:41.900 to confront someone 00:30:41.900 --> 00:30:42.660 in their sin. 00:30:42.840 --> 00:30:43.820 We see that in verses 00:30:43.820 --> 00:30:44.900 15 through 17. 00:30:45.700 --> 00:30:45.880 You know, 00:30:45.880 --> 00:30:46.800 anytime there's somebody 00:30:46.800 --> 00:30:47.640 that's sinned against you, 00:30:47.720 --> 00:30:48.800 you should confront them. 00:30:49.480 --> 00:30:49.880 We're told, 00:30:50.000 --> 00:30:51.040 we're commanded to do that. 00:30:51.400 --> 00:30:52.000 But there are times 00:30:52.000 --> 00:30:53.200 when that's simply not possible. 00:30:54.279 --> 00:30:54.840 There are times 00:30:54.840 --> 00:30:55.720 when you're not in a place 00:30:55.720 --> 00:30:56.180 to do that. 00:30:56.180 --> 00:30:56.680 And that's why, 00:30:56.799 --> 00:30:58.340 as we see in this chapter, 00:30:58.420 --> 00:30:59.180 it's good to sometimes 00:30:59.180 --> 00:31:00.039 rely on the community 00:31:00.039 --> 00:31:00.480 to help. 00:31:02.180 --> 00:31:02.980 There's also times 00:31:02.980 --> 00:31:03.640 when you can't simply 00:31:03.640 --> 00:31:04.220 because the person 00:31:04.220 --> 00:31:05.259 is no longer in your life 00:31:05.259 --> 00:31:06.960 or they've passed away. 00:31:11.000 --> 00:31:11.799 Canceling the debt 00:31:11.799 --> 00:31:13.480 is something that you can do, 00:31:14.259 --> 00:31:15.259 that you must do 00:31:15.259 --> 00:31:16.039 if you want to forgive, 00:31:16.920 --> 00:31:17.799 and that you can do 00:31:17.799 --> 00:31:18.640 in your own heart. 00:31:19.700 --> 00:31:20.640 But it's not easy. 00:31:21.700 --> 00:31:22.880 And then the last thing we do, 00:31:22.980 --> 00:31:23.799 so you assess 00:31:23.799 --> 00:31:24.980 or you name the hurt, 00:31:24.980 --> 00:31:25.920 the wrong. 00:31:27.640 --> 00:31:29.039 You cultivate empathy. 00:31:29.200 --> 00:31:29.740 You have pity. 00:31:30.140 --> 00:31:31.380 Identify with the perpetrator. 00:31:32.299 --> 00:31:33.180 Once you've done that, 00:31:33.259 --> 00:31:34.200 you cancel the debt. 00:31:34.539 --> 00:31:35.860 You pay it on their behalf. 00:31:36.880 --> 00:31:37.539 And then lastly, 00:31:37.680 --> 00:31:38.640 you have to let it go. 00:31:39.759 --> 00:31:41.380 The king lets the man walk out. 00:31:41.599 --> 00:31:42.380 You have to let it go. 00:31:42.440 --> 00:31:43.019 What does that mean? 00:31:43.319 --> 00:31:44.640 It means that you relinquish 00:31:44.640 --> 00:31:46.059 your right to ever hold this 00:31:46.059 --> 00:31:47.039 over that person again. 00:31:49.279 --> 00:31:50.299 You can't bring it up. 00:31:50.360 --> 00:31:51.160 You can't bring it back. 00:31:51.240 --> 00:31:52.400 You can't ever leverage it. 00:31:53.019 --> 00:31:54.079 You have to let it go. 00:31:54.980 --> 00:31:56.539 You don't forget. 00:31:56.799 --> 00:31:57.380 Forgive and forget 00:31:57.380 --> 00:31:58.279 is not in the Bible. 00:31:59.720 --> 00:32:02.059 That's pop psychology lunacy 00:32:02.059 --> 00:32:03.819 to tell somebody 00:32:03.819 --> 00:32:05.500 who's been traumatized 00:32:05.500 --> 00:32:05.920 or abused 00:32:05.920 --> 00:32:06.799 that they should forget. 00:32:08.039 --> 00:32:09.099 That's a big problem 00:32:09.099 --> 00:32:09.940 in trauma, actually, 00:32:10.519 --> 00:32:11.140 is the forgetting 00:32:11.140 --> 00:32:11.700 and the remembering. 00:32:13.700 --> 00:32:14.579 It doesn't mean 00:32:14.579 --> 00:32:15.299 forgive and forget, 00:32:15.579 --> 00:32:16.200 but it means that 00:32:16.200 --> 00:32:16.940 as you forgive 00:32:16.940 --> 00:32:18.539 and as you will 00:32:18.539 --> 00:32:19.400 probably remember, 00:32:19.980 --> 00:32:21.120 you choose what you do 00:32:21.120 --> 00:32:21.779 with those memories. 00:32:21.779 --> 00:32:23.359 and you choose 00:32:23.359 --> 00:32:24.319 not to use them 00:32:24.319 --> 00:32:24.799 as leverage 00:32:24.799 --> 00:32:25.660 over that person. 00:32:26.359 --> 00:32:27.859 You choose to let them go, 00:32:28.240 --> 00:32:29.039 let them walk free. 00:32:31.240 --> 00:32:31.920 And you say, 00:32:32.000 --> 00:32:32.740 well, I hear this 00:32:32.740 --> 00:32:33.859 and this is just not fair. 00:32:34.559 --> 00:32:35.359 You're right. 00:32:36.240 --> 00:32:37.319 It's not fair. 00:32:38.160 --> 00:32:38.440 Do you know 00:32:38.440 --> 00:32:39.000 what the definition 00:32:39.000 --> 00:32:40.119 of grace and mercy is? 00:32:40.779 --> 00:32:42.460 Mercy is not giving 00:32:42.460 --> 00:32:42.899 to somebody 00:32:42.899 --> 00:32:43.599 what they deserve. 00:32:45.440 --> 00:32:46.680 Grace is giving 00:32:46.680 --> 00:32:47.160 to somebody 00:32:47.160 --> 00:32:48.099 what they don't deserve. 00:32:48.099 --> 00:32:50.779 They're not fair. 00:32:51.159 --> 00:32:51.719 Grace and mercy 00:32:51.719 --> 00:32:52.579 are not fair. 00:32:56.119 --> 00:32:56.919 But forgiveness 00:32:56.919 --> 00:32:57.899 is necessary 00:32:57.899 --> 00:32:58.539 for Christians. 00:32:59.059 --> 00:32:59.799 It's not an option. 00:33:01.000 --> 00:33:01.899 And it's hard. 00:33:02.119 --> 00:33:03.259 It means identifying 00:33:03.259 --> 00:33:03.819 the wrong, 00:33:03.919 --> 00:33:04.819 having pity and empathy 00:33:04.819 --> 00:33:05.819 for a wrongdoer, 00:33:06.699 --> 00:33:07.480 canceling the debt 00:33:07.480 --> 00:33:08.179 and then letting them 00:33:08.179 --> 00:33:08.759 walk free. 00:33:09.659 --> 00:33:10.879 And then Jesus says, 00:33:11.019 --> 00:33:11.519 this is something 00:33:11.519 --> 00:33:12.399 that we are called 00:33:12.399 --> 00:33:13.659 to do over and over 00:33:13.659 --> 00:33:14.500 and over again. 00:33:14.759 --> 00:33:16.099 So that leads us 00:33:16.099 --> 00:33:16.980 to the last question. 00:33:18.099 --> 00:33:18.699 How on earth 00:33:18.699 --> 00:33:19.419 is this possible? 00:33:22.719 --> 00:33:23.699 The real power 00:33:23.699 --> 00:33:24.299 of this parable 00:33:24.299 --> 00:33:25.039 is the difference 00:33:25.039 --> 00:33:26.099 between the two debts. 00:33:26.199 --> 00:33:26.539 I told you 00:33:26.539 --> 00:33:27.339 we'd come back to this. 00:33:28.139 --> 00:33:28.919 The debt owed 00:33:28.919 --> 00:33:29.939 by the fellow servant 00:33:29.939 --> 00:33:30.480 is what? 00:33:31.639 --> 00:33:33.179 It's 100 denarii, 00:33:33.399 --> 00:33:33.699 right? 00:33:34.619 --> 00:33:34.980 Now, 00:33:36.179 --> 00:33:36.719 a denarii 00:33:36.719 --> 00:33:37.279 or denarius 00:33:37.279 --> 00:33:38.459 was about 00:33:38.459 --> 00:33:39.359 one day's wages. 00:33:40.559 --> 00:33:41.879 So I calculated this 00:33:41.879 --> 00:33:42.359 based on 00:33:42.359 --> 00:33:43.459 DC minimum wage. 00:33:44.579 --> 00:33:45.699 And the debt 00:33:45.699 --> 00:33:46.699 owed by one servant 00:33:46.699 --> 00:33:47.379 to the other 00:33:47.380 --> 00:33:48.680 is about $8,000. 00:33:50.040 --> 00:33:50.700 What's interesting 00:33:50.700 --> 00:33:51.320 about that is 00:33:51.320 --> 00:33:53.480 it's not a small sum. 00:33:54.880 --> 00:33:56.060 And by itself, 00:33:56.440 --> 00:33:57.320 if somebody owes you 00:33:57.320 --> 00:33:57.960 $8,000, 00:33:58.260 --> 00:33:59.400 that's a significant sum. 00:33:59.500 --> 00:33:59.580 You know, 00:33:59.620 --> 00:34:00.840 that's worth suing over. 00:34:00.920 --> 00:34:01.360 That's worth 00:34:01.360 --> 00:34:02.400 going to the authorities 00:34:02.400 --> 00:34:02.960 about, right? 00:34:03.160 --> 00:34:03.760 $8,000 00:34:03.760 --> 00:34:05.300 is a lot of money. 00:34:06.680 --> 00:34:07.660 It's not nothing. 00:34:08.059 --> 00:34:08.820 Sometimes when people 00:34:08.820 --> 00:34:09.539 talk about this parable, 00:34:09.619 --> 00:34:10.680 they say it's a paltry sum. 00:34:10.840 --> 00:34:11.559 I think it's important 00:34:11.559 --> 00:34:12.079 to recognize 00:34:12.079 --> 00:34:12.860 that by itself, 00:34:12.860 --> 00:34:13.420 this is actually 00:34:13.420 --> 00:34:14.000 a lot of money. 00:34:16.240 --> 00:34:17.220 But it's nothing 00:34:17.220 --> 00:34:18.180 compared to the debt 00:34:18.180 --> 00:34:19.380 that the servant 00:34:19.380 --> 00:34:20.059 owes the king. 00:34:20.840 --> 00:34:21.800 The servant owes 00:34:21.800 --> 00:34:22.240 the king 00:34:22.240 --> 00:34:23.500 10,000 talents. 00:34:23.720 --> 00:34:23.920 Now, 00:34:23.980 --> 00:34:24.519 we could try 00:34:24.519 --> 00:34:25.980 to calculate that up, 00:34:26.519 --> 00:34:27.720 but you would 00:34:27.720 --> 00:34:28.460 miss the point 00:34:28.460 --> 00:34:30.079 because a talent 00:34:30.079 --> 00:34:31.280 was the highest 00:34:31.280 --> 00:34:32.300 unit of currency 00:34:32.300 --> 00:34:33.900 that they had. 00:34:34.160 --> 00:34:35.140 And 10,000 00:34:35.140 --> 00:34:36.000 was the highest 00:34:36.000 --> 00:34:36.860 Greek numeral 00:34:36.860 --> 00:34:37.860 there was. 00:34:37.860 --> 00:34:39.860 So, 00:34:39.980 --> 00:34:40.460 it's not about 00:34:40.460 --> 00:34:40.980 the calculation. 00:34:41.300 --> 00:34:42.460 This is about extremes. 00:34:43.380 --> 00:34:44.340 This is like saying 00:34:44.340 --> 00:34:44.940 that the servant 00:34:44.940 --> 00:34:45.680 owed the king 00:34:45.680 --> 00:34:47.360 trillions of dollars. 00:34:49.220 --> 00:34:50.400 Makes the Greek debt 00:34:50.400 --> 00:34:51.860 look pretty small 00:34:51.860 --> 00:34:52.500 by comparison, 00:34:52.620 --> 00:34:52.820 right? 00:34:54.440 --> 00:34:55.599 Trillions of dollars. 00:34:57.400 --> 00:34:58.480 Trillions of dollars. 00:35:00.079 --> 00:35:01.059 Everything changes 00:35:01.059 --> 00:35:01.740 when you compare 00:35:01.740 --> 00:35:02.400 the amount 00:35:02.400 --> 00:35:03.099 of the debt 00:35:03.099 --> 00:35:04.099 owed to the servant 00:35:04.099 --> 00:35:05.380 and the amount 00:35:05.380 --> 00:35:05.900 of the debt 00:35:05.900 --> 00:35:07.180 owed to the king. 00:35:07.860 --> 00:35:08.620 $8,000 00:35:08.620 --> 00:35:10.019 seems huge 00:35:10.019 --> 00:35:11.820 until 00:35:11.820 --> 00:35:13.980 you hold it up 00:35:13.980 --> 00:35:14.360 against 00:35:14.360 --> 00:35:15.900 the greater debt. 00:35:18.140 --> 00:35:18.680 See, 00:35:18.760 --> 00:35:19.820 this is the key, 00:35:19.960 --> 00:35:20.300 I think, 00:35:20.380 --> 00:35:21.400 the real possible, 00:35:21.840 --> 00:35:22.800 the reason 00:35:22.800 --> 00:35:23.980 that Christian forgiveness 00:35:23.980 --> 00:35:25.059 is actually possible 00:35:25.059 --> 00:35:26.260 is forgiveness 00:35:26.260 --> 00:35:26.840 like this 00:35:26.840 --> 00:35:27.760 becomes possible 00:35:27.760 --> 00:35:28.640 when we turn 00:35:28.640 --> 00:35:29.180 our attention 00:35:29.180 --> 00:35:30.599 away from our debt, 00:35:30.860 --> 00:35:31.740 the debt owed us, 00:35:31.840 --> 00:35:33.220 and focus on the debt 00:35:33.220 --> 00:35:34.220 that we owe God 00:35:34.220 --> 00:35:35.240 and what God did 00:35:35.240 --> 00:35:36.120 for us through Jesus 00:35:36.120 --> 00:35:36.860 because the gospel 00:35:36.860 --> 00:35:37.320 is this. 00:35:37.320 --> 00:35:38.120 Here's the gospel. 00:35:38.400 --> 00:35:39.220 It starts this way. 00:35:39.720 --> 00:35:40.940 God assesses the debt. 00:35:41.059 --> 00:35:41.640 What is the debt? 00:35:42.039 --> 00:35:43.360 Our sin against God 00:35:43.360 --> 00:35:44.840 is bigger than the sum 00:35:44.840 --> 00:35:45.720 of all sin 00:35:45.720 --> 00:35:46.620 ever committed 00:35:46.620 --> 00:35:47.280 against us. 00:35:49.440 --> 00:35:50.559 Do you believe that? 00:35:52.240 --> 00:35:53.380 Our debt 00:35:53.380 --> 00:35:54.720 that we owe God 00:35:54.720 --> 00:35:56.140 is bigger than the sum 00:35:56.140 --> 00:35:57.480 of all of the sin 00:35:57.480 --> 00:35:58.300 and all of the debt 00:35:58.300 --> 00:35:59.700 that will ever be owed us. 00:35:59.699 --> 00:36:00.319 God sends us to us. 00:36:00.319 --> 00:36:00.939 God sends us to us. 00:36:00.939 --> 00:36:01.480 God sends us to us. 00:36:01.480 --> 00:36:02.079 God sends us to us. 00:36:02.079 --> 00:36:02.599 And yet, 00:36:02.599 --> 00:36:04.239 God sends his heart 00:36:04.239 --> 00:36:05.000 out to us. 00:36:05.799 --> 00:36:07.099 He sends his heart 00:36:07.099 --> 00:36:07.799 out to us. 00:36:08.500 --> 00:36:10.000 His heart has a name. 00:36:10.399 --> 00:36:10.939 It's Jesus. 00:36:11.799 --> 00:36:12.980 He sends his heart 00:36:12.980 --> 00:36:13.899 to be with us, 00:36:14.159 --> 00:36:15.460 to be one of us. 00:36:16.339 --> 00:36:17.480 And through the death 00:36:17.480 --> 00:36:18.000 of Jesus, 00:36:18.199 --> 00:36:19.319 God pays the debt 00:36:19.319 --> 00:36:20.679 off on our behalf, 00:36:20.739 --> 00:36:21.559 an infinite debt, 00:36:22.019 --> 00:36:22.960 cancels our debt, 00:36:23.239 --> 00:36:24.199 and sets us free 00:36:24.199 --> 00:36:25.899 to become his children, 00:36:26.039 --> 00:36:26.719 which is what we were 00:36:26.719 --> 00:36:27.879 made to be. 00:36:28.019 --> 00:36:29.039 So here's the point. 00:36:29.180 --> 00:36:30.140 Christian forgiveness, 00:36:30.380 --> 00:36:31.220 distinctly speaking, 00:36:31.640 --> 00:36:32.720 is only possible 00:36:32.720 --> 00:36:33.840 at the foot of the cross. 00:36:34.640 --> 00:36:35.760 It's only possible 00:36:35.760 --> 00:36:36.539 at the foot of the cross. 00:36:36.740 --> 00:36:37.500 And this is why, 00:36:37.579 --> 00:36:37.860 by the way, 00:36:37.860 --> 00:36:38.920 we have regular rhythms 00:36:38.920 --> 00:36:39.860 in our life together 00:36:39.860 --> 00:36:40.700 of gathering 00:36:40.700 --> 00:36:42.000 and confessing our sin 00:36:42.000 --> 00:36:43.079 and hearing forgiveness 00:36:43.079 --> 00:36:43.760 and singing 00:36:43.760 --> 00:36:44.340 and preaching 00:36:44.340 --> 00:36:44.980 and praying 00:36:44.980 --> 00:36:46.260 about God's forgiveness 00:36:46.260 --> 00:36:47.500 because it's all meant 00:36:47.500 --> 00:36:48.340 to keep our eyes 00:36:48.340 --> 00:36:49.140 on the cross 00:36:49.140 --> 00:36:51.480 rather than on everything 00:36:51.480 --> 00:36:52.200 that's owed us. 00:36:52.260 --> 00:36:52.860 It's the only way 00:36:52.860 --> 00:36:53.340 it's possible. 00:36:53.480 --> 00:36:54.420 So if you're here 00:36:54.420 --> 00:36:55.440 and you're not a Christian, 00:36:55.440 --> 00:36:58.860 I personally don't believe 00:36:58.860 --> 00:37:00.079 that the kind of forgiveness 00:37:00.079 --> 00:37:01.079 we're talking about here 00:37:01.079 --> 00:37:02.480 is possible for you. 00:37:03.119 --> 00:37:03.900 I'm not saying 00:37:03.900 --> 00:37:04.500 that forgiveness 00:37:04.500 --> 00:37:05.440 is not possible. 00:37:06.240 --> 00:37:07.400 But this kind of 00:37:07.400 --> 00:37:09.780 culture of forgiveness, 00:37:10.599 --> 00:37:11.119 unlimited, 00:37:11.740 --> 00:37:12.800 unconditional forgiveness, 00:37:13.659 --> 00:37:14.519 I don't believe 00:37:14.519 --> 00:37:15.179 that's possible 00:37:15.179 --> 00:37:16.119 apart from the cross. 00:37:16.780 --> 00:37:18.039 You simply lack 00:37:18.039 --> 00:37:19.280 the resources necessary. 00:37:19.280 --> 00:37:23.360 In order to forgive 00:37:23.360 --> 00:37:23.820 like this, 00:37:23.860 --> 00:37:24.940 we have to experience 00:37:24.940 --> 00:37:25.540 this forgiveness 00:37:25.540 --> 00:37:26.440 in our own lives. 00:37:28.980 --> 00:37:29.940 So that brings us 00:37:29.940 --> 00:37:32.920 back to our initial opening. 00:37:33.800 --> 00:37:34.519 The kingdom of God 00:37:34.519 --> 00:37:35.800 is radically countercultural 00:37:35.800 --> 00:37:37.300 because it's not 00:37:37.300 --> 00:37:38.240 a culture of outrage, 00:37:38.320 --> 00:37:38.880 it's a culture 00:37:38.880 --> 00:37:40.000 of forgiveness. 00:37:40.880 --> 00:37:41.340 It's a culture 00:37:41.340 --> 00:37:42.260 of mercy and grace. 00:37:43.300 --> 00:37:43.700 And listen, 00:37:43.800 --> 00:37:44.480 in our culture, 00:37:44.940 --> 00:37:45.840 things like anger 00:37:45.840 --> 00:37:47.580 and righteous indignation, 00:37:47.579 --> 00:37:49.380 they look like powerful weapons. 00:37:51.079 --> 00:37:52.739 And they make a difference. 00:37:53.900 --> 00:37:55.059 And it can be so tempting 00:37:55.059 --> 00:37:55.599 as Christians 00:37:55.599 --> 00:37:56.920 to pick those weapons up 00:37:56.920 --> 00:38:00.039 when people are coming after, 00:38:00.179 --> 00:38:01.400 when we feel 00:38:01.400 --> 00:38:03.420 that people are coming after us 00:38:03.420 --> 00:38:05.340 or attacking us 00:38:05.340 --> 00:38:06.539 or saying hateful things 00:38:06.539 --> 00:38:07.420 or persecuting us. 00:38:07.539 --> 00:38:08.360 It can be so easy 00:38:08.360 --> 00:38:09.519 to pick those weapons up, 00:38:09.840 --> 00:38:10.579 believing that these 00:38:10.579 --> 00:38:11.500 are the powerful weapons 00:38:11.500 --> 00:38:12.819 that will give us a chance. 00:38:12.820 --> 00:38:14.660 But what we have to realize 00:38:14.660 --> 00:38:15.720 is those weapons 00:38:15.720 --> 00:38:17.920 of anger and shame 00:38:17.920 --> 00:38:19.200 have no place 00:38:19.200 --> 00:38:20.000 in the kingdom of God. 00:38:20.940 --> 00:38:22.800 The only weapons we have 00:38:22.800 --> 00:38:24.559 are grace and mercy. 00:38:25.480 --> 00:38:26.220 That's it. 00:38:27.100 --> 00:38:28.300 And yet the good news is this, 00:38:28.360 --> 00:38:29.100 that grace and mercy 00:38:29.100 --> 00:38:30.440 are far more powerful. 00:38:31.960 --> 00:38:33.019 Far more powerful. 00:38:33.980 --> 00:38:34.480 Let's pray. 00:38:34.480 --> 00:39:04.460 Let's pray.