WEBVTT

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 Several years ago, the New York Times ran an article,

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 Unmarried Pastor Seeking a Job Sees Bias.

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 It chronicled the lives of several single evangelical pastors

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 who struggled to find employment.

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 And it noted several reasons for this,

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 and one of them was that churches often have unspoken expectations

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 for the pastor's family members.

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 So, for example, expecting the pastor's wife to be an unpaid employee

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 who plays the piano for the church and runs the children's ministry.

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 So that would obviously be an advantage for a married pastor.

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 So that's one reason it noted.

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 But the most reasons that it noted are what it called,

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 quote, irrational fears.

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 That a single pastor cannot counsel a mostly married flock.

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 That he might sow turmoil by flirting with a church member.

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 Or that he might be gay.

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 So those are the reasons they quoted for why churches were afraid to hire a single pastor.

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 And this article probably overplays the so-called bias a little bit.

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 But nevertheless, I think it points to a real discomfort

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 that there is with singleness in churches.

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 And frequently, there's an assumption in churches that singles want to get married.

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 If you're single, you must want to get married.

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 And then an expectation that if they have the opportunity that they will get married.

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 And a presumption that if they don't get married before a reasonable age,

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 that there is something deficient about them.

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 You guys have probably, some of you have probably experienced this.

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 And this unfortunate situation stems from an unbiblical view of singleness and marriage.

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 And it's a significant deviation, actually,

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 from the way the church has historically treated these issues and treated singles.

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 And so this passage offers a much-needed corrective here in 1 Corinthians 7, 25-40,

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 where Paul teaches us that singleness is a blessing from God in which we can please the Lord.

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 And the main three points that I want to highlight is verses 25-28.

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 It talks about the principle of singleness.

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 And verses 29-35 about the rationale for singleness.

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 And then verses 36-40 about the exception to singleness.

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 So principle, rationale, and exception.

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 And Paul begins this passage with the phrase in verse 25,

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 Now concerning the betrothed,

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 which is a helpful marker to indicate a new topic,

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 because this is now the second time Paul has used this phrase.

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 He said earlier in chapter 7, verse 1,

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 Now concerning the matters about which you wrote,

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 it is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.

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 And then he proceeded to deal with the issue of sexual relations within marriage

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 and about whether or not married Christians get divorced

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 so that they could avoid the sexual temptation and have practiced abstinence.

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 And Paul's response on both counts was no,

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 that people who are married should give each other their conjugal rights

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 and that people who are married should stay married and not divorce.

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 So in that section when he said,

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 Now concerning such and such,

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 he addressed that matter in that passage.

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 And now he's turning to the issue of singles.

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 In instance, Paul says betrothed,

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 which literally means virgins.

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 And it specifically refers to singles who are engaged,

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 basically have someone in their life that they're about to get married.

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 And remember that the Corinthians,

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 just remember the Corinthian context,

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 that they had an unbiblically low view of the body.

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 So some of the Corinthians were saying that it doesn't matter what you do with your body,

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 so do whatever you want with it.

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 Go commit sexual immorality.

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 That's fine.

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 And the other part,

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 other segment of the Corinthians believers were saying,

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 Well, since the body doesn't matter at all,

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 we shouldn't have anything to do with it.

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 Don't have any sex.

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 Don't even have sex in marriage.

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 Get divorced so that you don't have to be tempted to it.

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 So that's the kind of view that the Corinthians had.

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 And it seems from the context of this passage

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 that some of the people in some of these factions in the Corinthian church

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 were pressuring people,

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 singles who were engaged,

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 to not marry.

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 Saying,

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 Well, you're engaged.

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 Well, you shouldn't marry

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 because then you're going to have to have these things to do with the body,

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 have sexual relations.

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 That's not good.

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 It doesn't tend to spiritual things.

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 So you should stay betrothed.

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 You should not marry.

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 So they're applying those kind of pressures to them.

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 And even it seems from verse 28 and verse 36

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 that they were calling it sinful to marry.

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 If you're single, you're not married yet.

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 You shouldn't marry because to do so is sinful.

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 And so Paul seems to hear explicitly and forcefully

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 and repeatedly denies that,

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 saying that it is not sinful for a betrothed person

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 to go through with the marriage.

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 And so that's really the issue he's turning to

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 when he says,

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 Now concerning the betrothed,

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 he's addressing singles or engaged singles particularly.

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 And he continues in verse 25.

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 Concerning the betrothed,

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 I have no command from the Lord,

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 but I give my judgment

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 as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy.

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 So earlier in chapter 7, 12 to 13,

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 Paul said,

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 To the rest I say,

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 parentheses,

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 I, not the Lord,

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 that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever

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 and she consents to live with him,

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 he should not divorce her.

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 If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever

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 and he consents to live with her,

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 she should not divorce him.

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 So the reason why Paul added that qualification,

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 I, not the Lord,

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 in that instance,

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 was not to diminish the authoritativeness of his teaching

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 by saying,

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 Oh, this is just my personal opinion,

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 but to indicate that he wasn't relaying

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 a direct teaching of the Lord Jesus

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 as he was doing earlier

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 when he was talking about

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 how Christian couples should not divorce

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 and that even if they do,

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 that they should not remarry.

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 So he'd say in that case,

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 he was relaying a direct teaching of the Lord,

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 but on this case,

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 he was not.

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 So he says,

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 I, not the Lord, right?

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 So he's kind of doing a similar thing here

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 when he says that I don't have a command from the Lord,

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 I don't have a direct teaching from Jesus,

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 but I do give my judgment

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 as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy, right?

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 This is not just a throwaway opinion.

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 This is his judgment that the Corinthians asked for,

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 his apostolic judgment,

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 his judgment inspired by the Spirit,

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 and he's saying,

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 this is my judgment

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 as someone who by the Lord's mercy

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 is trustworthy

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 and he's about to tell us what his judgment is.

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 And it's amazing how he puts that, right?

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 So it's by the Lord's mercy that he's trustworthy,

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 that he can say anything that's trustworthy to these people.

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 It's because of the Lord's mercy,

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 not because of his intrinsic merit or quality.

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 So that's Paul,

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 because of God's mercy is trustworthy

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 and now he's gonna give us his judgment

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 in verses 26 to 27.

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 Read that with me.

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 I think that in view of the present distress,

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 it is good for a person to remain as he is.

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 Are you bound to a wife?

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 Do not seek to be free.

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 Are you free from a wife?

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 Do not seek a wife, right?

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 So this is where we find the principle of singleness

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 for the betrothed.

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 Those who are single should remain as they are.

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 And it's really the counterpart that mirrors

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 what he said earlier,

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 that those who are married should stay married.

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 Now he's saying those who are single should stay single.

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 And Paul offers a brief preview of his rationale for it

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 when he says,

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 in view of the present distress,

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 it is good for a person to remain as he is.

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 So the word that's translated distress here

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 literally means compulsion or a necessity.

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 It's the exact same word that is translated

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 in verse 37 of the same chapter as necessity.

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 So when it says,

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 whoever is firmly established in his heart,

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 being under no necessity,

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 but having his desire under control

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 and has determined this in his heart

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 to keep her as his betrothed,

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 he will do well.

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 So that's the same word.

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 So it refers to a situation

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 that brings some kind of compelling force to it.

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 So a situation that we cannot escape,

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 therefore with which we must cope

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 because we can't leave it.

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 So we might translate it to present exigencies

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 or the current pressing situation.

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 So because of the current pressing situation,

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 those who are single should remain as they are.

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 And the word present offers us another clue

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 as to the intended meaning of the word distress.

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 It's a distress, a necessity, a present situation

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 that characterizes the present,

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 the time we're in now.

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 And in verse 28, Paul says,

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 but if you do marry, you have not sinned.

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 And if a betrothed woman marries,

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 she has not sinned.

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 Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles.

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 And I would spare you that, right?

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 The phrase worldly troubles is in the Greek,

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 literally the troubles of the flesh

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 and refers to the anxieties and the stresses

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 that married people experience

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 by virtue of their fleshly and worldly existence

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 here and now, right?

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 So in light of these present pressing situations,

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 in light of our present existence in the flesh,

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 in this world,

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 it is good for a person to remain as he is.

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 Or as the Bible commentator, Leon Morris puts it,

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 when high seas are raging,

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 it is no time for changing ships.

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 That's basically what Paul's saying.

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 As Paul says later in verse 31,

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 the present form of this world is passing away.

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 So there's no reason then to make such a big deal

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 of marriage or singleness

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 as if those things determined our ability

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 to serve God and follow him.

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 Paul's principle is essentially the same

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 as what he taught in the previous passage,

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 namely that we can fulfill our Christian calling

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 no matter what condition we're in,

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 no matter what situation we're in.

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 Whether we're circumcised or uncircumcised,

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 whether we're free or enslaved.

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 So likewise here, Paul says in verse 27,

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 are you bound to a wife?

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 Do not seek to be free.

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 Are you free from a wife?

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 Do not seek a wife.

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 Because this present distress characterizes

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 the lives of all believers who live between two worlds.

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 Because it characterizes this present passing world,

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 we shouldn't be so invested in these things.

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 Now we can remain as we are.

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 So that's the principle that those who are not yet married

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 are to live by.

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 It is good for a person to remain as he is.

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 It's good to remain single.

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 So on this point, Paul agrees with the Corinthians.

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 But his enforcement of it is different

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 because he says it's not sinful to marry

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 while the Corinthians are saying that it's sinful to marry.

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 And Paul's theological reason for this principle is different.

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 But the principle that it's good to remain as they are

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 is the same.

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 But Paul is aware of the Corinthian tendency,

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 as I mentioned, to really codify this principle,

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 this general rule into a law that everybody has to observe.

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 So Paul adds a sharp qualification in verse 28.

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 He says,

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 But if you do marry, you have not sinned.

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 And if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned.

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 Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles,

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 and I would spare you that.

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 While it is good for a single man or woman to remain single,

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 it is decidedly not sinful for him or her to marry.

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 Then Paul adds the reason why he is really encouraging singleness,

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 and that he says,

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 And that serves really as the transition to verses 29 to 35,

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 where Paul offers us the rationale for singleness.

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 So let's turn to that.

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 He says in verse 29,

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 That's helpful, right?

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 So if what he said up to this point has been confusing to you,

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 Paul is about to explain it to us.

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 This is what I mean, brothers.

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 Verses 25 to 28.

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 In view of the present distress,

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 it is good for a person to remain in years.

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 That's what he is explaining now.

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 Those who marry will have worldly troubles.

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 What does that mean?

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 That's what he is explaining now.

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 And this is his rationale.

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 The appointed time has grown very short.

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 The appointed time refers to the second coming of Christ,

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 and the day of judgment.

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 And Paul is saying that the appointed time is imminent.

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 Paul also speaks of this in Acts 17, 32-31.

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 He says,

00:12:04.039 --> 00:12:06.339
 The times of ignorance God overlooked,

00:12:06.479 --> 00:12:09.399
 but now he commands all people everywhere to repent,

00:12:09.879 --> 00:12:11.779
 because he has fixed a day

00:12:11.779 --> 00:12:14.239
 on which he will judge the world in righteousness

00:12:14.239 --> 00:12:16.199
 by a man whom he has appointed.

00:12:16.699 --> 00:12:19.299
 And of this he has given assurance to all

00:12:19.299 --> 00:12:21.620
 by raising him from the dead.

00:12:21.620 --> 00:12:25.279
 So the end of the world as we know it is imminent.

00:12:25.679 --> 00:12:27.479
 Not in the sense that the hourglass

00:12:27.479 --> 00:12:29.659
 is about to run out of sand necessarily,

00:12:29.919 --> 00:12:31.439
 but in the sense that the hourglass

00:12:31.439 --> 00:12:33.059
 has been turned over

00:12:33.059 --> 00:12:34.699
 and that the clock is ticking.

00:12:35.379 --> 00:12:37.219
 Our life here, we're on the clock now.

00:12:37.539 --> 00:12:39.139
 The appointed time is impending,

00:12:39.279 --> 00:12:41.899
 and it's making unavoidable progress

00:12:41.899 --> 00:12:43.079
 toward its fulfillment.

00:12:43.959 --> 00:12:45.219
 If you think about it this way,

00:12:45.259 --> 00:12:46.639
 it's impending in a similar way

00:12:46.639 --> 00:12:47.979
 that our death is impending.

00:12:48.579 --> 00:12:50.259
 I mean, our death is imminent, right?

00:12:50.599 --> 00:12:51.799
 Sorry to break it to you,

00:12:51.899 --> 00:12:52.879
 but the death,

00:12:52.879 --> 00:12:54.840
 not in the sense that you're about to die tomorrow

00:12:54.840 --> 00:12:55.679
 or next week,

00:12:55.840 --> 00:12:57.700
 but that death is surely coming.

00:12:58.159 --> 00:12:59.980
 And in light of the context of history

00:12:59.980 --> 00:13:01.679
 and about our life,

00:13:01.740 --> 00:13:02.879
 it's really, really short.

00:13:03.360 --> 00:13:04.100
 Time is short,

00:13:04.200 --> 00:13:05.059
 and our death is coming,

00:13:05.120 --> 00:13:06.299
 and we have to live in light of it.

00:13:06.320 --> 00:13:08.080
 And that's what Paul is telling us here,

00:13:08.159 --> 00:13:09.939
 that it's fast approaching.

00:13:10.039 --> 00:13:11.700
 The finish line is now visible.

00:13:12.200 --> 00:13:13.879
 The end is in sight,

00:13:14.120 --> 00:13:16.320
 because the life, death, resurrection,

00:13:16.539 --> 00:13:17.679
 and ascension of Jesus Christ

00:13:17.679 --> 00:13:19.519
 has signaled, has marked,

00:13:19.599 --> 00:13:21.739
 has fixed the end of the age.

00:13:21.799 --> 00:13:23.639
 It's the beginning of the end of the age.

00:13:24.120 --> 00:13:25.079
 And because of that,

00:13:25.379 --> 00:13:25.799
 Paul says,

00:13:25.859 --> 00:13:28.639
 the appointed time has grown very short.

00:13:29.779 --> 00:13:31.579
 And then in verses 30 to 31,

00:13:31.739 --> 00:13:33.579
 Paul offers us a series of examples

00:13:33.579 --> 00:13:36.599
 that illustrate the application of this principle.

00:13:37.459 --> 00:13:38.039
 Read with me.

00:13:38.039 --> 00:14:06.659
 I just noticed the light flickering,

00:14:06.659 --> 00:14:08.740
 but I don't want you guys to ignore it.

00:14:08.819 --> 00:14:10.980
 Think of it as it's nearing the end of the age,

00:14:11.120 --> 00:14:12.659
 and this is what this passage is all about.

00:14:13.439 --> 00:14:13.959
 And now,

00:14:14.240 --> 00:14:15.819
 in this principle,

00:14:15.939 --> 00:14:16.459
 so he's illustrating,

00:14:16.559 --> 00:14:17.740
 so it'd be a mistake

00:14:17.740 --> 00:14:19.159
 if we took these illustrations

00:14:19.159 --> 00:14:20.039
 that he gave us here

00:14:20.039 --> 00:14:21.679
 and applied it literally,

00:14:22.219 --> 00:14:23.219
 because that would be,

00:14:23.719 --> 00:14:25.879
 that would mean that husbands who have wives

00:14:25.879 --> 00:14:27.159
 should ignore their wives,

00:14:27.279 --> 00:14:27.779
 neglect them,

00:14:27.819 --> 00:14:29.519
 and live like their wives don't exist, right?

00:14:29.919 --> 00:14:31.759
 That would mean that you're really sad

00:14:31.759 --> 00:14:32.360
 and you're mourning,

00:14:32.480 --> 00:14:34.120
 and then you act like you're not sad,

00:14:34.179 --> 00:14:34.959
 you're not mourning, right?

00:14:34.960 --> 00:14:36.780
 I mean, that's not what Paul is saying.

00:14:36.879 --> 00:14:38.540
 He's not saying when you own things,

00:14:38.580 --> 00:14:39.000
 you purchase,

00:14:39.420 --> 00:14:40.620
 don't act like you don't have them,

00:14:40.780 --> 00:14:41.600
 don't use them.

00:14:41.620 --> 00:14:42.740
 That's not what Paul is saying.

00:14:43.120 --> 00:14:44.560
 These illustrations are here

00:14:44.560 --> 00:14:45.960
 to demonstrate a principle,

00:14:46.360 --> 00:14:47.500
 to demonstrate a point

00:14:47.500 --> 00:14:49.200
 that he wants to make,

00:14:49.480 --> 00:14:50.259
 because, in fact,

00:14:50.300 --> 00:14:51.379
 if you applied it literally,

00:14:51.500 --> 00:14:52.800
 it would directly contradict

00:14:52.800 --> 00:14:53.980
 what he just said.

00:14:54.060 --> 00:14:54.320
 He said,

00:14:54.660 --> 00:14:55.160
 let those,

00:14:55.320 --> 00:14:56.080
 when he says,

00:14:56.160 --> 00:14:57.240
 let those who have wives

00:14:57.240 --> 00:14:58.460
 live as though they had none,

00:14:59.000 --> 00:14:59.160
 right,

00:14:59.240 --> 00:15:00.100
 if that would directly,

00:15:00.240 --> 00:15:01.240
 if we did that literally,

00:15:01.360 --> 00:15:02.300
 that would directly contradict

00:15:02.299 --> 00:15:03.740
 what he said in the preceding passage

00:15:03.740 --> 00:15:04.379
 when he gave,

00:15:04.579 --> 00:15:05.459
 told husbands and wives

00:15:05.459 --> 00:15:06.079
 to give each other

00:15:06.079 --> 00:15:07.000
 their conjugal rights.

00:15:07.479 --> 00:15:08.219
 And not only that,

00:15:08.259 --> 00:15:11.120
 he says in the following section

00:15:11.120 --> 00:15:12.259
 that the married man

00:15:12.259 --> 00:15:13.879
 is anxious about worldly things,

00:15:13.919 --> 00:15:15.000
 how to please his wife.

00:15:15.019 --> 00:15:16.539
 That's how a married man should be,

00:15:16.639 --> 00:15:18.079
 anxious to please his wife.

00:15:18.519 --> 00:15:19.859
 And so Paul's not saying,

00:15:20.199 --> 00:15:22.679
 live as if you don't have your spouses.

00:15:23.159 --> 00:15:24.059
 It's not supposed to be

00:15:24.059 --> 00:15:25.439
 pressed into literal detail,

00:15:25.559 --> 00:15:26.559
 but rather the principle

00:15:26.559 --> 00:15:27.799
 that he's asserting is this,

00:15:28.120 --> 00:15:30.000
 since Christians have been

00:15:30.000 --> 00:15:31.759
 time stamped with eternity,

00:15:32.259 --> 00:15:33.480
 we should not accord

00:15:33.480 --> 00:15:34.740
 ultimate significance

00:15:34.740 --> 00:15:36.320
 to worldly things

00:15:36.320 --> 00:15:38.159
 that have expiration dates on them.

00:15:38.899 --> 00:15:40.740
 Marriage has an expiration date on it.

00:15:41.200 --> 00:15:43.279
 So don't act as if that marriage

00:15:43.279 --> 00:15:44.419
 is what defines you

00:15:44.419 --> 00:15:45.759
 and gives you ultimate significance

00:15:45.759 --> 00:15:46.519
 and meaning.

00:15:47.279 --> 00:15:48.580
 Live as if that's from,

00:15:48.799 --> 00:15:49.620
 that ultimate significance

00:15:49.620 --> 00:15:51.100
 comes from the Lord alone.

00:15:51.919 --> 00:15:52.419
 Like it's,

00:15:52.720 --> 00:15:53.159
 you would,

00:15:53.259 --> 00:15:54.679
 if you knew that you had

00:15:54.679 --> 00:15:55.820
 one year left to live

00:15:55.820 --> 00:15:56.960
 because you have terminal cancer,

00:15:57.039 --> 00:15:57.159
 I mean,

00:15:57.220 --> 00:15:59.019
 you would undoubtedly live differently,

00:15:59.580 --> 00:15:59.820
 right?

00:15:59.820 --> 00:16:01.660
 Christians who have seen

00:16:01.660 --> 00:16:02.800
 the last day

00:16:02.800 --> 00:16:04.680
 live with clarity,

00:16:04.900 --> 00:16:06.700
 live today with urgency,

00:16:06.980 --> 00:16:07.200
 right?

00:16:07.480 --> 00:16:08.900
 We're to live this day

00:16:08.900 --> 00:16:10.460
 in light of that day.

00:16:10.540 --> 00:16:11.180
 That's what Paul

00:16:11.180 --> 00:16:12.180
 is trying to teach us.

00:16:12.460 --> 00:16:13.360
 That doesn't mean

00:16:13.360 --> 00:16:15.400
 we seek to escape the world

00:16:15.400 --> 00:16:16.580
 or detach ourselves

00:16:16.580 --> 00:16:17.300
 from the world.

00:16:17.580 --> 00:16:18.460
 We still marry,

00:16:18.840 --> 00:16:19.780
 we still mourn,

00:16:19.900 --> 00:16:20.700
 we still rejoice,

00:16:20.840 --> 00:16:21.879
 we still buy things,

00:16:21.920 --> 00:16:23.360
 and we still deal with the world

00:16:23.360 --> 00:16:24.760
 like the rest of humanity,

00:16:24.960 --> 00:16:26.420
 but we must not give

00:16:26.420 --> 00:16:27.680
 ultimate significance

00:16:27.680 --> 00:16:28.580
 to these things.

00:16:28.580 --> 00:16:30.100
 We deal with the world,

00:16:30.160 --> 00:16:31.660
 but we're not defined by it

00:16:31.660 --> 00:16:34.540
 as people who are in the world,

00:16:34.639 --> 00:16:36.080
 but not of it.

00:16:36.200 --> 00:16:37.680
 We live with awareness

00:16:37.680 --> 00:16:39.180
 of the present distress,

00:16:39.400 --> 00:16:40.840
 the present exigencies

00:16:40.840 --> 00:16:41.960
 that characterize life

00:16:41.960 --> 00:16:42.860
 between two worlds.

00:16:43.520 --> 00:16:44.320
 So that means

00:16:44.320 --> 00:16:45.420
 whether we are circumcised

00:16:46.100 --> 00:16:46.420
 or uncircumcised,

00:16:47.200 --> 00:16:49.220
 whether free or enslaved,

00:16:49.500 --> 00:16:50.340
 whether we are single

00:16:50.340 --> 00:16:51.020
 or married,

00:16:51.100 --> 00:16:51.920
 we are to remain

00:16:51.920 --> 00:16:52.860
 as we are

00:16:52.860 --> 00:16:53.720
 and live

00:16:53.720 --> 00:16:55.140
 as if we are not.

00:16:55.139 --> 00:16:56.460
 That means

00:16:56.460 --> 00:16:57.240
 if you're married,

00:16:58.220 --> 00:16:59.240
 you shouldn't look

00:16:59.240 --> 00:16:59.819
 to your husband

00:16:59.819 --> 00:17:00.799
 or wife

00:17:00.799 --> 00:17:02.779
 for your ultimate sense

00:17:02.779 --> 00:17:03.659
 of self-worth

00:17:03.659 --> 00:17:04.700
 and fulfillment.

00:17:06.879 --> 00:17:07.660
 That means

00:17:07.660 --> 00:17:08.460
 if you're single,

00:17:08.859 --> 00:17:10.119
 you shouldn't be desperate

00:17:10.119 --> 00:17:10.779
 for a boyfriend

00:17:10.779 --> 00:17:11.319
 or a girlfriend

00:17:11.319 --> 00:17:11.920
 or a husband

00:17:11.920 --> 00:17:12.759
 or a wife

00:17:12.759 --> 00:17:13.920
 as if he or she

00:17:13.920 --> 00:17:14.720
 can be your savior

00:17:14.720 --> 00:17:15.879
 and imbue your life

00:17:15.879 --> 00:17:16.519
 with meaning

00:17:16.519 --> 00:17:17.519
 and significance.

00:17:18.319 --> 00:17:19.960
 If we look to men

00:17:19.960 --> 00:17:21.220
 for such fulfillment,

00:17:21.480 --> 00:17:22.440
 we will invariably

00:17:22.440 --> 00:17:23.200
 be disappointed.

00:17:23.200 --> 00:17:25.039
 We are people

00:17:25.039 --> 00:17:25.819
 who are defined

00:17:25.819 --> 00:17:27.319
 by our heavenward call,

00:17:27.559 --> 00:17:30.299
 not by our earthly circumstances.

00:17:30.460 --> 00:17:31.100
 Only God

00:17:31.100 --> 00:17:32.240
 can provide ultimate meaning.

00:17:32.380 --> 00:17:32.900
 Only God

00:17:32.900 --> 00:17:34.200
 can provide eternal security

00:17:34.200 --> 00:17:35.940
 and that's Paul's rationale

00:17:35.940 --> 00:17:37.380
 for why singles

00:17:37.380 --> 00:17:38.480
 should remain singles.

00:17:39.180 --> 00:17:40.480
 For the present form

00:17:40.480 --> 00:17:41.019
 of this world

00:17:41.019 --> 00:17:42.500
 is passing away.

00:17:43.700 --> 00:17:45.480
 And then in verses 32-34,

00:17:45.600 --> 00:17:46.039
 he provides

00:17:46.039 --> 00:17:46.900
 a little more detail.

00:17:47.500 --> 00:17:47.680
 He says,

00:17:47.740 --> 00:17:48.799
 I want you to be free

00:17:48.799 --> 00:17:49.640
 from anxieties.

00:17:50.440 --> 00:17:51.519
 The unmarried man

00:17:51.519 --> 00:17:52.100
 is anxious

00:17:52.100 --> 00:17:52.920
 about the things

00:17:52.920 --> 00:17:53.480
 of the Lord,

00:17:53.600 --> 00:17:54.759
 how to please the Lord,

00:17:54.800 --> 00:17:55.720
 but the married man

00:17:55.720 --> 00:17:56.300
 is anxious

00:17:56.300 --> 00:17:57.720
 about worldly things,

00:17:57.880 --> 00:17:59.560
 how to please his wife,

00:18:00.000 --> 00:18:00.920
 and his interests

00:18:00.920 --> 00:18:01.920
 are divided.

00:18:02.440 --> 00:18:03.320
 And the unmarried

00:18:03.320 --> 00:18:04.200
 or betrothed woman

00:18:04.200 --> 00:18:04.980
 is anxious

00:18:04.980 --> 00:18:06.000
 about the things

00:18:06.000 --> 00:18:06.880
 of the Lord,

00:18:07.080 --> 00:18:07.980
 how to be holy

00:18:07.980 --> 00:18:09.240
 in body and spirit,

00:18:09.539 --> 00:18:10.560
 but the married woman

00:18:10.560 --> 00:18:11.160
 is anxious

00:18:11.160 --> 00:18:12.360
 about worldly things,

00:18:12.480 --> 00:18:13.320
 how to please

00:18:13.320 --> 00:18:14.220
 her husband.

00:18:14.720 --> 00:18:16.000
 So Paul's not here

00:18:16.000 --> 00:18:16.700
 speaking about

00:18:16.700 --> 00:18:18.060
 sinful anxiety

00:18:18.060 --> 00:18:19.220
 because he's saying

00:18:19.220 --> 00:18:20.019
 that the unmarried man

00:18:20.019 --> 00:18:20.580
 is anxious

00:18:20.580 --> 00:18:21.400
 about the things

00:18:21.400 --> 00:18:21.980
 of the Lord,

00:18:22.019 --> 00:18:22.660
 how to please the Lord.

00:18:22.660 --> 00:18:23.540
 So that's not sinful.

00:18:23.660 --> 00:18:24.560
 It's the way

00:18:24.560 --> 00:18:25.180
 it should be.

00:18:25.500 --> 00:18:26.259
 It's a good thing

00:18:26.259 --> 00:18:26.720
 to be anxious

00:18:26.720 --> 00:18:27.279
 about the things

00:18:27.279 --> 00:18:27.620
 of the Lord

00:18:27.620 --> 00:18:28.620
 and wanting to please him.

00:18:28.840 --> 00:18:29.600
 So he's not talking

00:18:29.600 --> 00:18:30.800
 about sinful anxiety,

00:18:30.980 --> 00:18:32.279
 but a proper concern

00:18:32.279 --> 00:18:33.220
 that we ought to have

00:18:33.220 --> 00:18:33.900
 with things

00:18:33.900 --> 00:18:35.640
 regarding which

00:18:35.640 --> 00:18:36.320
 we will be accountable

00:18:36.320 --> 00:18:36.820
 to God.

00:18:36.819 --> 00:18:38.319
 And the truth of the matter

00:18:38.319 --> 00:18:39.339
 is the married man

00:18:39.339 --> 00:18:40.419
 is anxious

00:18:40.419 --> 00:18:42.179
 about worldly things,

00:18:42.179 --> 00:18:43.839
 how to please his wife.

00:18:44.359 --> 00:18:45.240
 And his interests

00:18:45.240 --> 00:18:46.279
 are divided.

00:18:47.279 --> 00:18:48.299
 And the married woman

00:18:48.299 --> 00:18:49.240
 is anxious

00:18:49.240 --> 00:18:50.659
 about worldly things,

00:18:50.779 --> 00:18:51.639
 how to please

00:18:51.639 --> 00:18:53.000
 her husband.

00:18:53.299 --> 00:18:54.079
 If you are married

00:18:54.079 --> 00:18:55.200
 and you're not anxious

00:18:55.200 --> 00:18:55.919
 about how to please

00:18:55.919 --> 00:18:56.500
 your wife

00:18:56.500 --> 00:18:57.279
 or please your husband,

00:18:57.379 --> 00:18:58.259
 then you're not living

00:18:58.259 --> 00:18:58.720
 in marriage

00:18:58.720 --> 00:18:59.500
 as you should be.

00:18:59.819 --> 00:19:00.879
 You should be anxious

00:19:00.879 --> 00:19:01.399
 about those things.

00:19:01.859 --> 00:19:03.399
 And this is the reality.

00:19:03.500 --> 00:19:03.960
 For this reason,

00:19:04.040 --> 00:19:04.720
 Paul wants those

00:19:04.720 --> 00:19:05.620
 who can remain single

00:19:05.620 --> 00:19:06.519
 to do so

00:19:06.519 --> 00:19:07.420
 in order that they

00:19:07.420 --> 00:19:07.980
 might be free

00:19:07.980 --> 00:19:08.880
 from these particular

00:19:08.880 --> 00:19:10.019
 anxieties that attend

00:19:10.019 --> 00:19:11.040
 to marriage.

00:19:12.500 --> 00:19:13.240
 And here,

00:19:13.560 --> 00:19:14.660
 notice that Paul

00:19:14.660 --> 00:19:15.740
 separately addresses

00:19:15.740 --> 00:19:16.640
 the unmarried

00:19:16.640 --> 00:19:17.420
 and the betrothed.

00:19:17.480 --> 00:19:18.100
 So that confirms

00:19:18.100 --> 00:19:19.100
 our early interpretation

00:19:19.100 --> 00:19:20.180
 from the preceding passage

00:19:20.180 --> 00:19:21.259
 that the unmarried people

00:19:21.259 --> 00:19:22.800
 refer to demarried people.

00:19:23.280 --> 00:19:24.240
 So people who are now

00:19:24.240 --> 00:19:24.960
 single but who were

00:19:24.960 --> 00:19:25.620
 once married.

00:19:25.980 --> 00:19:26.680
 And the betrothed

00:19:26.680 --> 00:19:28.019
 are people who were

00:19:28.019 --> 00:19:28.580
 never married.

00:19:28.680 --> 00:19:29.300
 So they've been

00:19:29.300 --> 00:19:29.900
 their virgins.

00:19:30.940 --> 00:19:32.460
 And so he's addressing

00:19:32.460 --> 00:19:33.460
 both here.

00:19:34.160 --> 00:19:34.799
 And in view of

00:19:34.799 --> 00:19:35.880
 the present distress,

00:19:36.400 --> 00:19:38.000
 the things of this world

00:19:38.000 --> 00:19:39.799
 can easily entangle us.

00:19:40.059 --> 00:19:41.240
 And when we get married,

00:19:41.579 --> 00:19:42.579
 these worldly troubles

00:19:42.579 --> 00:19:43.759
 are compounded

00:19:43.759 --> 00:19:44.660
 because now,

00:19:44.740 --> 00:19:45.740
 not only are we anxious

00:19:45.740 --> 00:19:46.700
 to please the Lord,

00:19:46.960 --> 00:19:48.180
 we must also be anxious

00:19:48.180 --> 00:19:49.220
 about worldly things,

00:19:49.299 --> 00:19:50.079
 how to please

00:19:50.079 --> 00:19:51.279
 our respective spouses.

00:19:52.319 --> 00:19:53.360
 When we marry,

00:19:53.819 --> 00:19:54.559
 even if it's

00:19:54.559 --> 00:19:55.340
 to a fellow believer,

00:19:55.559 --> 00:19:56.640
 our interests are

00:19:56.640 --> 00:19:57.600
 in a real way

00:19:57.600 --> 00:19:58.299
 divided.

00:19:58.920 --> 00:19:59.680
 So that's why

00:19:59.680 --> 00:20:00.180
 Paul writes

00:20:00.180 --> 00:20:01.000
 in verse 35,

00:20:01.000 --> 00:20:02.059
 I say this

00:20:02.059 --> 00:20:03.359
 for your own benefit,

00:20:03.940 --> 00:20:04.799
 not to lay any

00:20:04.799 --> 00:20:06.019
 restraint upon you,

00:20:06.079 --> 00:20:06.640
 but to promote

00:20:06.640 --> 00:20:07.200
 good order

00:20:07.200 --> 00:20:07.920
 and to secure

00:20:07.920 --> 00:20:09.420
 your undivided

00:20:09.420 --> 00:20:11.039
 devotion to the Lord.

00:20:12.059 --> 00:20:13.660
 But in contrast

00:20:13.660 --> 00:20:14.440
 to the Corinthians,

00:20:14.819 --> 00:20:15.779
 Paul's not willing

00:20:15.779 --> 00:20:16.400
 to elevate

00:20:16.400 --> 00:20:17.720
 this general principle

00:20:17.720 --> 00:20:18.519
 into law.

00:20:18.940 --> 00:20:19.740
 So he adds

00:20:19.740 --> 00:20:20.440
 that he's saying

00:20:20.440 --> 00:20:21.579
 this for their benefit,

00:20:21.759 --> 00:20:22.500
 not to lay

00:20:22.500 --> 00:20:23.339
 any restraint

00:20:23.339 --> 00:20:24.039
 upon them.

00:20:24.559 --> 00:20:24.740
 Right?

00:20:24.819 --> 00:20:25.420
 The phrase

00:20:25.420 --> 00:20:26.759
 lay any restraint

00:20:26.759 --> 00:20:28.460
 is a translation

00:20:28.460 --> 00:20:30.039
 of a metaphorical expression

00:20:30.039 --> 00:20:31.500
 that literally means

00:20:31.500 --> 00:20:32.579
 to throw a news

00:20:32.579 --> 00:20:33.779
 upon someone's neck,

00:20:33.940 --> 00:20:35.000
 to throw a news upon.

00:20:35.079 --> 00:20:35.779
 So Paul's saying

00:20:35.779 --> 00:20:37.019
 that his principle

00:20:37.019 --> 00:20:37.559
 of singleness

00:20:37.559 --> 00:20:38.799
 is for their benefit.

00:20:39.180 --> 00:20:40.339
 It's not supposed

00:20:40.339 --> 00:20:41.079
 to be interpreted

00:20:41.079 --> 00:20:41.799
 legalistically

00:20:41.799 --> 00:20:42.599
 as a news

00:20:42.599 --> 00:20:43.500
 around your neck.

00:20:43.660 --> 00:20:44.519
 So don't feel

00:20:44.519 --> 00:20:45.720
 like legally bound

00:20:45.720 --> 00:20:46.059
 to it.

00:20:46.319 --> 00:20:47.740
 Don't let it be

00:20:47.740 --> 00:20:48.140
 something,

00:20:48.279 --> 00:20:49.279
 it's not a requirement,

00:20:49.420 --> 00:20:49.660
 it's something

00:20:49.660 --> 00:20:50.259
 that's helpful.

00:20:50.740 --> 00:20:51.619
 It's an advice

00:20:51.619 --> 00:20:52.819
 that's salutary,

00:20:52.819 --> 00:20:54.099
 it's not necessary.

00:20:54.480 --> 00:20:55.240
 That's the principle

00:20:55.240 --> 00:20:56.200
 of singleness.

00:20:57.440 --> 00:20:58.420
 And I want you guys

00:20:58.420 --> 00:20:59.480
 to really think about this

00:20:59.480 --> 00:21:00.339
 for a minute

00:21:00.339 --> 00:21:02.620
 because this is probably

00:21:02.620 --> 00:21:03.700
 not how you have,

00:21:04.359 --> 00:21:05.420
 you're used to thinking

00:21:05.420 --> 00:21:06.059
 about marriage

00:21:06.059 --> 00:21:06.480
 and singleness.

00:21:06.839 --> 00:21:07.839
 It's definitely

00:21:07.839 --> 00:21:09.039
 counter-cultural.

00:21:09.720 --> 00:21:10.759
 And so let it sink in

00:21:10.759 --> 00:21:12.380
 because it's unusual.

00:21:12.660 --> 00:21:13.440
 Because usually

00:21:13.440 --> 00:21:14.299
 the way we think about it

00:21:14.299 --> 00:21:15.759
 is it's okay

00:21:15.759 --> 00:21:16.440
 to stay single.

00:21:16.880 --> 00:21:17.539
 Of course you don't

00:21:17.539 --> 00:21:18.240
 have to marry,

00:21:18.539 --> 00:21:19.160
 but it's certainly

00:21:19.160 --> 00:21:20.160
 better to marry.

00:21:20.160 --> 00:21:21.059
 That's how we typically

00:21:21.059 --> 00:21:21.759
 think about marriage

00:21:21.759 --> 00:21:22.160
 and singleness,

00:21:22.279 --> 00:21:22.579
 isn't it?

00:21:23.559 --> 00:21:24.319
 But Paul teaches

00:21:24.319 --> 00:21:25.220
 that while it's fine

00:21:25.220 --> 00:21:25.819
 to marry,

00:21:26.079 --> 00:21:26.860
 it's better

00:21:26.860 --> 00:21:27.860
 to remain single.

00:21:28.579 --> 00:21:29.339
 And his rationale

00:21:29.339 --> 00:21:30.019
 for singleness

00:21:30.019 --> 00:21:31.059
 is that it promotes

00:21:31.059 --> 00:21:32.380
 undivided devotion

00:21:32.380 --> 00:21:33.420
 to the Lord.

00:21:34.180 --> 00:21:34.839
 And I want to speak

00:21:34.839 --> 00:21:35.319
 to those of you

00:21:35.319 --> 00:21:36.440
 who are single directly.

00:21:37.400 --> 00:21:38.600
 Do you see your singleness

00:21:38.600 --> 00:21:40.519
 in this biblical perspective?

00:21:41.860 --> 00:21:43.279
 Scripture unequivocally

00:21:43.279 --> 00:21:44.759
 affirms and commends

00:21:44.759 --> 00:21:45.240
 singleness

00:21:45.240 --> 00:21:46.500
 as a viable way

00:21:46.500 --> 00:21:47.140
 of life

00:21:47.140 --> 00:21:48.460
 that can bring glory

00:21:48.460 --> 00:21:49.140
 to God.

00:21:49.240 --> 00:21:50.440
 Do you see your singleness

00:21:50.440 --> 00:21:51.100
 in this way?

00:21:52.120 --> 00:21:53.140
 Later in verse 40,

00:21:53.360 --> 00:21:53.839
 Paul says that

00:21:53.839 --> 00:21:54.579
 a Christian widow

00:21:54.579 --> 00:21:55.720
 who does not remarry

00:21:55.720 --> 00:21:56.659
 but remains single

00:21:56.659 --> 00:21:58.279
 is happier for it.

00:21:59.000 --> 00:21:59.179
 Quote,

00:21:59.559 --> 00:22:00.379
 the word happy

00:22:00.379 --> 00:22:01.399
 means blessed

00:22:01.399 --> 00:22:02.819
 or fortunate.

00:22:02.939 --> 00:22:03.639
 It's the same word

00:22:03.639 --> 00:22:04.500
 that Jesus uses

00:22:04.500 --> 00:22:05.699
 in the Sermon on the Mount

00:22:05.699 --> 00:22:06.500
 when he says,

00:22:06.939 --> 00:22:07.819
 blessed are the poor

00:22:07.819 --> 00:22:08.379
 in spirit

00:22:08.379 --> 00:22:09.480
 for theirs is

00:22:09.480 --> 00:22:10.319
 the kingdom of heaven.

00:22:10.359 --> 00:22:10.699
 He says,

00:22:10.939 --> 00:22:12.059
 they are more blessed

00:22:12.059 --> 00:22:13.319
 who remain single,

00:22:13.480 --> 00:22:14.079
 the widow that does

00:22:14.079 --> 00:22:14.720
 not remarry.

00:22:15.980 --> 00:22:16.879
 That means singleness

00:22:16.880 --> 00:22:18.440
 is not a malady

00:22:18.440 --> 00:22:19.680
 to be remedied.

00:22:20.820 --> 00:22:21.920
 It is a blessing

00:22:21.920 --> 00:22:22.980
 to be enjoyed

00:22:22.980 --> 00:22:24.080
 for God's glory.

00:22:24.860 --> 00:22:25.600
 Do you think of

00:22:25.600 --> 00:22:26.160
 your singleness

00:22:26.160 --> 00:22:27.080
 in that way?

00:22:28.240 --> 00:22:28.880
 Although we didn't

00:22:28.880 --> 00:22:29.600
 plan this,

00:22:30.060 --> 00:22:31.520
 I do not have the foresight

00:22:31.520 --> 00:22:32.080
 to plan it

00:22:32.080 --> 00:22:33.080
 this far out in advance,

00:22:33.360 --> 00:22:34.060
 but I think it's

00:22:34.060 --> 00:22:35.180
 God's providential wisdom

00:22:35.180 --> 00:22:36.180
 and wonderful sense

00:22:36.180 --> 00:22:36.520
 of humor

00:22:36.520 --> 00:22:37.420
 that this passage

00:22:37.420 --> 00:22:38.180
 falls right after

00:22:38.180 --> 00:22:39.020
 Valentine's Day

00:22:39.020 --> 00:22:41.160
 in the beginning

00:22:41.160 --> 00:22:41.640
 of Lent.

00:22:41.640 --> 00:22:43.520
 Some of you

00:22:43.520 --> 00:22:44.040
 probably hate

00:22:44.040 --> 00:22:44.720
 Valentine's Day

00:22:44.720 --> 00:22:46.460
 because it's

00:22:46.460 --> 00:22:47.560
 a perennial reminder

00:22:47.560 --> 00:22:48.700
 of your unfulfilled

00:22:48.700 --> 00:22:49.840
 longing for romance

00:22:49.840 --> 00:22:51.060
 and relationship

00:22:51.060 --> 00:22:52.160
 and companionship.

00:22:53.120 --> 00:22:54.120
 Maybe some of you

00:22:54.120 --> 00:22:55.620
 are kind of masochistic

00:22:55.620 --> 00:22:56.320
 and you browse

00:22:56.320 --> 00:22:57.480
 through wedding blogs

00:22:57.480 --> 00:22:58.220
 and scroll through

00:22:58.220 --> 00:22:58.920
 other people's

00:22:58.920 --> 00:23:00.040
 social media profiles

00:23:00.040 --> 00:23:01.740
 to remind yourself

00:23:01.740 --> 00:23:02.759
 of just how much

00:23:02.759 --> 00:23:04.020
 other people's love life

00:23:04.020 --> 00:23:05.160
 is better than yours.

00:23:06.100 --> 00:23:06.660
 But remember

00:23:06.660 --> 00:23:07.540
 that your singleness

00:23:07.540 --> 00:23:08.740
 is a blessing.

00:23:09.720 --> 00:23:10.980
 Don't turn marriage

00:23:10.980 --> 00:23:11.960
 into an idol.

00:23:12.140 --> 00:23:13.720
 If you feel distressed

00:23:13.720 --> 00:23:15.019
 or depressed

00:23:15.019 --> 00:23:16.400
 by your singleness,

00:23:16.539 --> 00:23:17.480
 if you feel angry

00:23:17.480 --> 00:23:19.019
 or bitter toward God

00:23:19.019 --> 00:23:20.059
 because of your singleness

00:23:20.059 --> 00:23:21.259
 or any situation

00:23:21.259 --> 00:23:21.920
 or circumstance

00:23:21.920 --> 00:23:22.779
 for that matter,

00:23:23.440 --> 00:23:24.460
 then you have replaced

00:23:24.460 --> 00:23:26.000
 God's vision of happiness,

00:23:26.180 --> 00:23:27.700
 God's vision of blessedness

00:23:27.700 --> 00:23:28.700
 with your own.

00:23:30.380 --> 00:23:31.599
 Singleness is a blessing

00:23:31.599 --> 00:23:32.240
 from God

00:23:32.240 --> 00:23:32.980
 in which we can

00:23:32.980 --> 00:23:33.759
 please the Lord.

00:23:33.900 --> 00:23:35.200
 Don't buy the illusion

00:23:35.200 --> 00:23:36.460
 of love and romance

00:23:36.460 --> 00:23:37.000
 that our culture

00:23:37.000 --> 00:23:37.880
 is selling you.

00:23:38.460 --> 00:23:39.299
 Your marriage

00:23:39.299 --> 00:23:40.339
 is not all roses

00:23:40.339 --> 00:23:41.279
 and I say this

00:23:41.279 --> 00:23:41.799
 even though

00:23:41.799 --> 00:23:43.199
 I'm a happily married man.

00:23:45.139 --> 00:23:46.019
 Hannah has been

00:23:46.019 --> 00:23:46.859
 a tremendous source

00:23:46.859 --> 00:23:47.319
 of blessing

00:23:47.319 --> 00:23:48.699
 in my life

00:23:48.699 --> 00:23:50.359
 and apart from Christ

00:23:50.359 --> 00:23:51.439
 and his spirit,

00:23:51.740 --> 00:23:52.500
 she is the single

00:23:52.500 --> 00:23:53.119
 greatest gift

00:23:53.119 --> 00:23:54.319
 that I have ever received

00:23:54.319 --> 00:23:55.000
 from the Lord

00:23:55.000 --> 00:23:57.539
 and I cherish

00:23:57.539 --> 00:23:58.579
 every day I get to spend

00:23:58.579 --> 00:23:58.919
 with her

00:23:58.919 --> 00:24:00.339
 and this is all true.

00:24:02.539 --> 00:24:03.019
 But

00:24:03.019 --> 00:24:04.879
 I would be lying to you

00:24:04.879 --> 00:24:05.980
 if I didn't tell you

00:24:05.980 --> 00:24:06.659
 that it's hard.

00:24:06.660 --> 00:24:10.700
 it takes work.

00:24:11.440 --> 00:24:12.200
 It takes work

00:24:12.200 --> 00:24:13.540
 every single day

00:24:13.540 --> 00:24:14.519
 and it requires you

00:24:14.519 --> 00:24:15.400
 to die to your own

00:24:15.400 --> 00:24:16.019
 selfishness

00:24:16.019 --> 00:24:17.860
 every single day.

00:24:17.960 --> 00:24:18.720
 There are no days

00:24:18.720 --> 00:24:19.560
 off in marriage.

00:24:21.400 --> 00:24:22.259
 There were times

00:24:22.259 --> 00:24:23.180
 earlier in our marriage

00:24:23.180 --> 00:24:24.040
 I just broke down

00:24:24.040 --> 00:24:24.440
 and wept

00:24:24.440 --> 00:24:25.720
 because of how hard

00:24:25.720 --> 00:24:26.279
 it was

00:24:26.279 --> 00:24:28.620
 because I saw

00:24:28.620 --> 00:24:29.120
 the depth

00:24:29.120 --> 00:24:30.480
 of that sinfulness

00:24:30.480 --> 00:24:31.500
 and selfishness

00:24:31.500 --> 00:24:32.019
 and ugliness

00:24:32.019 --> 00:24:32.779
 in my own heart

00:24:32.779 --> 00:24:33.800
 exposed by my

00:24:33.800 --> 00:24:34.700
 relationship to Hannah.

00:24:34.700 --> 00:24:36.019
 And there are days

00:24:36.019 --> 00:24:36.960
 when I still weep

00:24:36.960 --> 00:24:37.680
 because of the ways

00:24:37.680 --> 00:24:38.180
 in which I know

00:24:38.180 --> 00:24:38.940
 I have hurt Hannah

00:24:38.940 --> 00:24:40.019
 in my own sinfulness.

00:24:41.340 --> 00:24:42.620
 It's not easy

00:24:42.620 --> 00:24:43.840
 to be married.

00:24:47.500 --> 00:24:48.620
 So if you

00:24:48.620 --> 00:24:49.799
 are going to pursue marriage

00:24:49.799 --> 00:24:50.559
 it's not sin

00:24:50.559 --> 00:24:51.480
 to pursue marriage

00:24:51.480 --> 00:24:53.279
 but do so

00:24:53.279 --> 00:24:54.480
 with biblical clarity

00:24:54.480 --> 00:24:55.920
 knowing that

00:24:55.920 --> 00:24:56.680
 living together

00:24:56.680 --> 00:24:57.759
 with another sinner

00:24:57.759 --> 00:24:59.240
 is not going to be easy

00:24:59.240 --> 00:25:00.279
 it's going to be difficult.

00:25:01.460 --> 00:25:02.799
 No human relationship

00:25:02.799 --> 00:25:03.720
 is going to solve

00:25:03.720 --> 00:25:04.620
 all of your woes.

00:25:05.600 --> 00:25:06.559
 And know this also

00:25:06.559 --> 00:25:07.299
 that your marriage

00:25:07.299 --> 00:25:08.100
 if you get married

00:25:08.100 --> 00:25:09.140
 is going to divide

00:25:09.140 --> 00:25:10.019
 your interests.

00:25:10.440 --> 00:25:11.240
 When I'm counseling

00:25:11.240 --> 00:25:11.960
 a church member

00:25:11.960 --> 00:25:12.720
 over coffee

00:25:12.720 --> 00:25:13.680
 or over the phone

00:25:13.680 --> 00:25:14.840
 and the conversation

00:25:14.840 --> 00:25:15.960
 is going long

00:25:15.960 --> 00:25:17.900
 and I have to be mindful

00:25:17.900 --> 00:25:18.340
 of the fact

00:25:18.340 --> 00:25:19.080
 that the longer

00:25:19.080 --> 00:25:19.980
 I am away

00:25:19.980 --> 00:25:21.200
 the longer Hannah

00:25:21.200 --> 00:25:21.980
 will have to hold

00:25:21.980 --> 00:25:22.900
 down the fort at home

00:25:22.900 --> 00:25:23.740
 and she's having

00:25:23.740 --> 00:25:24.700
 a much more repetitive

00:25:24.700 --> 00:25:25.720
 exhausting

00:25:25.720 --> 00:25:26.940
 and less stimulating

00:25:26.940 --> 00:25:27.539
 conversation

00:25:27.539 --> 00:25:28.340
 with our kids.

00:25:29.340 --> 00:25:30.279
 That's the reality.

00:25:30.380 --> 00:25:31.380
 My interests are divided.

00:25:31.380 --> 00:25:33.920
 When we were

00:25:33.920 --> 00:25:34.300
 prayerfully

00:25:34.300 --> 00:25:34.920
 considering

00:25:34.920 --> 00:25:36.220
 and deciding

00:25:36.220 --> 00:25:37.200
 where to plant

00:25:37.200 --> 00:25:38.840
 Trinity Cambridge Church

00:25:38.840 --> 00:25:41.840
 there were some

00:25:41.840 --> 00:25:42.240
 neighborhoods

00:25:42.240 --> 00:25:42.940
 that were

00:25:42.940 --> 00:25:43.980
 out of the question

00:25:43.980 --> 00:25:44.880
 right from the gate

00:25:44.880 --> 00:25:45.540
 right out of the gate

00:25:45.540 --> 00:25:45.840
 because

00:25:45.840 --> 00:25:47.020
 I could not

00:25:47.020 --> 00:25:48.140
 merely think about

00:25:48.140 --> 00:25:49.020
 my calling to the Lord

00:25:49.020 --> 00:25:49.960
 but I had to think about

00:25:49.960 --> 00:25:51.420
 how to care for my family

00:25:51.420 --> 00:25:52.720
 and my kids.

00:25:52.720 --> 00:25:57.680
 Thankfully Hannah

00:25:57.680 --> 00:25:58.640
 is a selfless

00:25:58.640 --> 00:25:59.740
 and faithful woman

00:25:59.740 --> 00:26:00.339
 so there's much

00:26:00.339 --> 00:26:01.039
 that we can do

00:26:01.039 --> 00:26:01.640
 together

00:26:01.640 --> 00:26:02.680
 in partnership

00:26:02.680 --> 00:26:04.220
 but there's no man

00:26:04.220 --> 00:26:04.620
 or woman

00:26:04.620 --> 00:26:05.559
 in the whole world

00:26:05.559 --> 00:26:06.279
 whose interests

00:26:06.279 --> 00:26:07.460
 are exactly identical

00:26:07.460 --> 00:26:08.339
 to that of the Lord.

00:26:10.100 --> 00:26:11.279
 And so when you get married

00:26:11.279 --> 00:26:11.920
 your interests

00:26:11.920 --> 00:26:13.019
 will be divided

00:26:13.019 --> 00:26:14.279
 and when you're married

00:26:14.279 --> 00:26:15.259
 you have to

00:26:15.259 --> 00:26:15.940
 be anxious

00:26:15.940 --> 00:26:16.980
 about worldly things

00:26:16.980 --> 00:26:17.720
 how to please

00:26:17.720 --> 00:26:18.440
 your spouse.

00:26:19.960 --> 00:26:20.600
 If you're currently

00:26:20.600 --> 00:26:21.000
 single

00:26:21.000 --> 00:26:22.120
 and you're old enough

00:26:22.119 --> 00:26:23.279
 to have some married friends

00:26:23.279 --> 00:26:24.159
 you probably have seen

00:26:24.159 --> 00:26:24.559
 this already

00:26:24.559 --> 00:26:25.439
 you may have noticed

00:26:25.439 --> 00:26:26.019
 that your friends

00:26:26.019 --> 00:26:27.159
 kind of drop off the map

00:26:27.159 --> 00:26:27.979
 when they get married

00:26:27.979 --> 00:26:30.039
 there's a reason for that.

00:26:32.739 --> 00:26:33.799
 So if you're single

00:26:33.799 --> 00:26:34.879
 let me encourage you

00:26:34.879 --> 00:26:36.439
 to take advantage

00:26:36.439 --> 00:26:37.359
 of your singleness

00:26:37.359 --> 00:26:38.479
 harness it

00:26:38.479 --> 00:26:39.479
 to serve God

00:26:39.479 --> 00:26:40.259
 and his people.

00:26:40.839 --> 00:26:42.059
 Even if you don't intend

00:26:42.059 --> 00:26:42.679
 to be single

00:26:42.679 --> 00:26:43.779
 for the rest of your life

00:26:43.779 --> 00:26:45.059
 you can glorify God

00:26:45.059 --> 00:26:46.239
 in your singleness now.

00:26:47.059 --> 00:26:47.899
 Because you're single

00:26:47.899 --> 00:26:48.579
 in many ways

00:26:48.579 --> 00:26:49.799
 you can be more spontaneous

00:26:49.799 --> 00:26:50.759
 and selfless

00:26:50.759 --> 00:26:51.779
 than married people

00:26:51.779 --> 00:26:52.819
 can ever hope to be.

00:26:54.680 --> 00:26:55.819
 Are you using that

00:26:55.819 --> 00:26:56.440
 for God's glory?

00:26:57.500 --> 00:26:58.460
 Of course that doesn't

00:26:58.460 --> 00:26:59.559
 just happen naturally

00:26:59.559 --> 00:27:00.039
 right?

00:27:00.180 --> 00:27:01.399
 God's not glorified

00:27:01.399 --> 00:27:02.420
 by singleness

00:27:02.420 --> 00:27:03.359
 in and of itself.

00:27:03.559 --> 00:27:04.519
 You have to use

00:27:04.519 --> 00:27:05.460
 singleness for God's glory

00:27:05.460 --> 00:27:06.680
 because it's possible

00:27:06.680 --> 00:27:07.500
 to be single

00:27:07.500 --> 00:27:09.079
 and be completely selfish

00:27:09.079 --> 00:27:10.240
 and undevoted to God.

00:27:10.339 --> 00:27:11.240
 There's a lot of those people

00:27:11.240 --> 00:27:11.639
 as well.

00:27:12.299 --> 00:27:12.980
 So it's not something

00:27:12.980 --> 00:27:13.700
 that's going to come to you

00:27:13.700 --> 00:27:14.200
 naturally

00:27:14.200 --> 00:27:15.519
 but in your singleness

00:27:15.519 --> 00:27:16.660
 you have the potential

00:27:16.660 --> 00:27:17.819
 to give yourself

00:27:17.819 --> 00:27:19.019
 wholly and exclusively

00:27:19.019 --> 00:27:19.920
 and entirely

00:27:19.920 --> 00:27:21.019
 to God.

00:27:22.180 --> 00:27:23.440
 Are you doing that?

00:27:24.940 --> 00:27:26.019
 That's his rationale

00:27:26.019 --> 00:27:26.800
 for singleness.

00:27:27.960 --> 00:27:29.259
 But as I've said already

00:27:29.259 --> 00:27:30.640
 that Paul doesn't

00:27:30.640 --> 00:27:32.000
 codify this into law

00:27:32.000 --> 00:27:32.779
 this principle

00:27:32.779 --> 00:27:33.300
 of singleness.

00:27:33.759 --> 00:27:34.580
 So he offers

00:27:34.580 --> 00:27:35.580
 in this final section

00:27:35.580 --> 00:27:36.380
 the exception

00:27:36.380 --> 00:27:37.140
 to singleness.

00:27:38.519 --> 00:27:39.740
 In verse 35

00:27:39.740 --> 00:27:40.259
 Paul said

00:27:40.259 --> 00:27:40.980
 he was commending

00:27:40.980 --> 00:27:41.500
 singleness

00:27:41.500 --> 00:27:43.039
 to promote

00:27:43.039 --> 00:27:44.080
 good order

00:27:44.080 --> 00:27:45.120
 but now

00:27:45.120 --> 00:27:45.940
 in verse 36

00:27:45.940 --> 00:27:47.100
 he speaks of a situation

00:27:47.100 --> 00:27:48.259
 where the exact opposite

00:27:48.259 --> 00:27:48.900
 is happening.

00:27:49.059 --> 00:27:49.319
 He says

00:27:49.319 --> 00:27:50.859
 if anyone thinks

00:27:50.859 --> 00:27:52.420
 that he is not behaving

00:27:52.420 --> 00:27:54.819
 properly toward his betrothed

00:27:54.819 --> 00:27:55.379
 the phrase

00:27:55.379 --> 00:27:57.039
 not behaving properly

00:27:57.039 --> 00:27:57.700
 in the Greek

00:27:57.700 --> 00:27:59.039
 is the negative form

00:27:59.039 --> 00:28:00.500
 of this exact same word

00:28:00.500 --> 00:28:01.059
 that was used

00:28:01.059 --> 00:28:01.839
 in verse 35

00:28:01.839 --> 00:28:02.359
 translated

00:28:02.359 --> 00:28:03.539
 promote good order.

00:28:04.039 --> 00:28:05.019
 So Paul's telling us

00:28:05.019 --> 00:28:05.599
 that even though

00:28:05.599 --> 00:28:06.839
 he is commending singleness

00:28:06.839 --> 00:28:08.259
 to promote good order

00:28:08.259 --> 00:28:09.319
 there are cases

00:28:09.319 --> 00:28:10.039
 when singleness

00:28:10.039 --> 00:28:10.940
 is actually

00:28:10.940 --> 00:28:11.720
 not going to promote

00:28:11.720 --> 00:28:12.119
 good order

00:28:12.119 --> 00:28:13.859
 but tend to disorderliness

00:28:13.859 --> 00:28:15.559
 and produce

00:28:15.559 --> 00:28:17.259
 improper behavior

00:28:17.259 --> 00:28:18.699
 between singles.

00:28:19.319 --> 00:28:20.319
 And so he says

00:28:20.319 --> 00:28:21.799
 and that's

00:28:21.799 --> 00:28:23.059
 what he is addressing here

00:28:23.059 --> 00:28:23.619
 he says

00:28:23.619 --> 00:28:24.699
 if his passions

00:28:24.699 --> 00:28:25.219
 are strong

00:28:25.219 --> 00:28:26.119
 this is the exception

00:28:26.119 --> 00:28:27.859
 if his passions

00:28:27.859 --> 00:28:28.439
 are strong

00:28:28.439 --> 00:28:29.899
 and it has to be

00:28:29.899 --> 00:28:30.939
 let him do

00:28:30.939 --> 00:28:32.199
 as he wishes

00:28:32.199 --> 00:28:33.259
 let them marry

00:28:33.259 --> 00:28:34.599
 it is no sin.

00:28:35.619 --> 00:28:36.059
 If you have

00:28:36.059 --> 00:28:37.319
 a strong desire

00:28:37.319 --> 00:28:38.259
 to get married

00:28:38.259 --> 00:28:39.639
 so that you are convinced

00:28:39.639 --> 00:28:40.359
 that you ought

00:28:40.359 --> 00:28:41.119
 to get married

00:28:41.119 --> 00:28:43.859
 and so it has to be

00:28:43.859 --> 00:28:44.879
 then scripture says

00:28:44.879 --> 00:28:45.419
 let him do

00:28:45.419 --> 00:28:46.000
 as he wishes

00:28:46.000 --> 00:28:46.839
 let them marry

00:28:46.839 --> 00:28:48.199
 it is no sin.

00:28:48.979 --> 00:28:49.579
 And note the phrase

00:28:49.579 --> 00:28:50.059
 let him do

00:28:50.059 --> 00:28:51.159
 as he wishes

00:28:51.159 --> 00:28:51.879
 it's okay

00:28:51.879 --> 00:28:52.859
 to follow through

00:28:52.859 --> 00:28:54.019
 with your wish

00:28:54.019 --> 00:28:54.779
 to marry

00:28:54.779 --> 00:28:55.500
 getting married

00:28:55.500 --> 00:28:57.079
 is not a sin.

00:28:58.179 --> 00:28:59.319
 So while Paul agrees

00:28:59.319 --> 00:28:59.959
 that singleness

00:28:59.959 --> 00:29:01.079
 is preferable

00:29:01.079 --> 00:29:01.959
 for the sake

00:29:01.959 --> 00:29:02.879
 of singular devotion

00:29:02.879 --> 00:29:03.399
 to God

00:29:03.399 --> 00:29:04.039
 for him

00:29:04.039 --> 00:29:04.839
 it is not a matter

00:29:04.839 --> 00:29:05.359
 of obedience

00:29:05.359 --> 00:29:06.279
 or disobedience

00:29:06.279 --> 00:29:07.279
 it's no sin

00:29:07.279 --> 00:29:07.719
 to marry

00:29:07.719 --> 00:29:08.359
 in fact

00:29:08.359 --> 00:29:08.919
 as we know

00:29:08.919 --> 00:29:10.439
 from Proverbs 18.22

00:29:10.440 --> 00:29:11.860
 he who finds

00:29:11.860 --> 00:29:12.279
 a wife

00:29:12.279 --> 00:29:13.600
 finds a good thing

00:29:13.600 --> 00:29:14.420
 and obtains

00:29:14.420 --> 00:29:15.880
 favor from the Lord.

00:29:16.320 --> 00:29:17.500
 This is also true

00:29:17.500 --> 00:29:18.420
 but for those

00:29:18.420 --> 00:29:18.700
 who have

00:29:18.700 --> 00:29:20.880
 strong passions

00:29:20.880 --> 00:29:21.960
 marriage

00:29:21.960 --> 00:29:22.840
 is its own

00:29:22.840 --> 00:29:23.840
 blessing from God.

00:29:24.580 --> 00:29:25.380
 While singleness

00:29:25.380 --> 00:29:26.480
 is a great blessing

00:29:26.480 --> 00:29:27.059
 from God

00:29:27.059 --> 00:29:28.660
 it's not for everyone

00:29:28.660 --> 00:29:29.620
 and if your passions

00:29:29.620 --> 00:29:30.559
 are strong

00:29:30.559 --> 00:29:32.080
 then marriage

00:29:32.080 --> 00:29:33.039
 may be the blessing

00:29:33.039 --> 00:29:33.660
 that God

00:29:33.660 --> 00:29:34.840
 intends for you.

00:29:36.140 --> 00:29:37.360
 Recall what Paul said

00:29:37.360 --> 00:29:37.980
 in verse 7

00:29:37.980 --> 00:29:38.820
 of the same chapter

00:29:38.819 --> 00:29:39.919
 I wish

00:29:39.919 --> 00:29:40.939
 that all

00:29:40.939 --> 00:29:41.460
 were as

00:29:41.460 --> 00:29:42.179
 I myself

00:29:42.179 --> 00:29:42.559
 am

00:29:42.559 --> 00:29:43.480
 but each

00:29:43.480 --> 00:29:44.419
 has his own

00:29:44.419 --> 00:29:45.200
 gift from God

00:29:45.200 --> 00:29:46.079
 one of one

00:29:46.079 --> 00:29:46.480
 kind

00:29:46.480 --> 00:29:46.960
 and one

00:29:46.960 --> 00:29:47.720
 of another.

00:29:48.220 --> 00:29:48.700
 So Paul

00:29:48.700 --> 00:29:49.279
 was someone

00:29:49.279 --> 00:29:49.899
 whose sexual

00:29:49.899 --> 00:29:50.419
 passions

00:29:50.419 --> 00:29:51.099
 were not

00:29:51.099 --> 00:29:51.639
 strong

00:29:51.639 --> 00:29:52.779
 and he had

00:29:52.779 --> 00:29:53.460
 his desires

00:29:53.460 --> 00:29:54.500
 under control.

00:29:54.980 --> 00:29:55.519
 So when Paul

00:29:55.519 --> 00:29:56.259
 insists that

00:29:56.259 --> 00:29:56.980
 his celibacy

00:29:56.980 --> 00:29:57.879
 is a gift

00:29:57.879 --> 00:29:59.579
 he's saying

00:29:59.579 --> 00:30:00.139
 that not all

00:30:00.139 --> 00:30:00.819
 have this gift

00:30:00.819 --> 00:30:01.200
 when he says

00:30:01.200 --> 00:30:01.879
 I wish

00:30:01.879 --> 00:30:02.559
 that all

00:30:02.559 --> 00:30:02.899
 were as

00:30:02.899 --> 00:30:03.319
 myself

00:30:03.319 --> 00:30:03.539
 am

00:30:03.539 --> 00:30:04.000
 he's saying

00:30:04.000 --> 00:30:04.339
 that not

00:30:04.339 --> 00:30:05.000
 all are

00:30:05.000 --> 00:30:05.779
 as he is

00:30:05.779 --> 00:30:06.639
 so the clear

00:30:06.639 --> 00:30:07.059
 implication

00:30:07.059 --> 00:30:07.460
 is that

00:30:07.460 --> 00:30:08.240
 the gift

00:30:08.240 --> 00:30:08.660
 of celibacy

00:30:08.660 --> 00:30:09.039
 is not

00:30:09.039 --> 00:30:09.399
 common

00:30:09.399 --> 00:30:09.879
 to all

00:30:09.879 --> 00:30:10.779
 and that's

00:30:10.779 --> 00:30:11.119
 why Paul

00:30:11.119 --> 00:30:11.440
 writes

00:30:11.440 --> 00:30:12.079
 in 1 Corinthians

00:30:12.079 --> 00:30:12.500
 12

00:30:12.500 --> 00:30:12.940
 that God

00:30:12.940 --> 00:30:13.579
 sovereignly

00:30:13.579 --> 00:30:14.200
 distributes

00:30:14.200 --> 00:30:15.119
 many gifts

00:30:15.119 --> 00:30:15.799
 diverse gifts

00:30:15.799 --> 00:30:16.559
 to the very

00:30:16.559 --> 00:30:17.420
 members of the body

00:30:17.420 --> 00:30:17.940
 for the sake

00:30:17.940 --> 00:30:18.319
 of promoting

00:30:18.319 --> 00:30:19.160
 interdependence

00:30:19.160 --> 00:30:20.500
 within the body

00:30:20.500 --> 00:30:21.460
 so that means

00:30:21.460 --> 00:30:21.960
 if someone

00:30:21.960 --> 00:30:22.539
 has a gift

00:30:22.539 --> 00:30:23.240
 of celibacy

00:30:23.240 --> 00:30:23.879
 and if you

00:30:23.879 --> 00:30:24.359
 don't have

00:30:24.359 --> 00:30:24.599
 the gift

00:30:24.599 --> 00:30:25.019
 of celibacy

00:30:25.019 --> 00:30:25.319
 then you

00:30:25.319 --> 00:30:26.059
 have another

00:30:26.059 --> 00:30:26.440
 gift

00:30:26.440 --> 00:30:27.019
 that God

00:30:27.019 --> 00:30:27.440
 has given

00:30:27.440 --> 00:30:28.079
 you to use

00:30:28.079 --> 00:30:29.039
 for the body

00:30:29.039 --> 00:30:29.879
 and it is

00:30:29.879 --> 00:30:30.639
 inadvisable

00:30:30.639 --> 00:30:31.240
 and dangerous

00:30:31.240 --> 00:30:31.680
 for someone

00:30:31.680 --> 00:30:32.259
 who does not

00:30:32.259 --> 00:30:32.879
 have the gift

00:30:32.879 --> 00:30:33.599
 of celibacy

00:30:33.599 --> 00:30:34.680
 to insist

00:30:34.680 --> 00:30:35.220
 on that

00:30:35.220 --> 00:30:36.079
 and to insist

00:30:36.079 --> 00:30:36.640
 on such a

00:30:36.640 --> 00:30:36.900
 standard

00:30:36.900 --> 00:30:37.900
 for everybody

00:30:37.900 --> 00:30:39.519
 and so those

00:30:39.519 --> 00:30:40.000
 who do not

00:30:40.000 --> 00:30:40.640
 have the gift

00:30:40.640 --> 00:30:41.019
 of celibacy

00:30:41.019 --> 00:30:41.539
 have a gift

00:30:41.539 --> 00:30:42.380
 of another

00:30:42.380 --> 00:30:42.880
 kind

00:30:42.880 --> 00:30:44.779
 so this shows

00:30:44.779 --> 00:30:45.180
 us that

00:30:45.180 --> 00:30:45.860
 we shouldn't

00:30:45.860 --> 00:30:47.000
 elevate singleness

00:30:47.000 --> 00:30:48.039
 to a point

00:30:48.039 --> 00:30:48.720
 where we put

00:30:48.720 --> 00:30:49.360
 people who are

00:30:49.360 --> 00:30:50.380
 single on a pedestal

00:30:50.380 --> 00:30:51.380
 and then look down

00:30:51.380 --> 00:30:52.079
 on married people

00:30:52.079 --> 00:30:53.000
 I mean this is not

00:30:53.000 --> 00:30:53.500
 as common

00:30:53.500 --> 00:30:54.240
 in our context

00:30:54.240 --> 00:30:54.980
 but it has

00:30:54.980 --> 00:30:55.600
 been common

00:30:55.600 --> 00:30:56.240
 throughout church

00:30:56.240 --> 00:30:56.600
 history

00:30:56.600 --> 00:30:57.819
 especially certain

00:30:57.819 --> 00:30:58.460
 denominations

00:30:58.460 --> 00:30:59.360
 that insist

00:30:59.360 --> 00:31:00.620
 that the pastor

00:31:00.620 --> 00:31:01.059
 or priest

00:31:01.059 --> 00:31:02.000
 has to be

00:31:02.000 --> 00:31:02.579
 celibate

00:31:02.579 --> 00:31:03.500
 even if he does

00:31:03.500 --> 00:31:04.100
 not have

00:31:04.099 --> 00:31:05.199
 the gift

00:31:05.199 --> 00:31:05.819
 of celibacy

00:31:05.819 --> 00:31:06.199
 right

00:31:06.199 --> 00:31:08.839
 we can't

00:31:08.839 --> 00:31:09.259
 pressure

00:31:09.259 --> 00:31:09.879
 or force

00:31:09.879 --> 00:31:10.159
 people

00:31:10.159 --> 00:31:10.500
 into the

00:31:10.500 --> 00:31:10.719
 life

00:31:10.719 --> 00:31:11.319
 of celibacy

00:31:11.319 --> 00:31:11.759
 and that's

00:31:11.759 --> 00:31:12.679
 abundantly clear

00:31:12.679 --> 00:31:13.579
 from verse 37

00:31:13.579 --> 00:31:14.240
 look at it with me

00:31:14.240 --> 00:31:15.019
 verse 37

00:31:15.019 --> 00:31:16.019
 but whoever

00:31:16.019 --> 00:31:16.939
 is firmly

00:31:16.939 --> 00:31:17.619
 established

00:31:17.619 --> 00:31:18.240
 in his heart

00:31:18.240 --> 00:31:19.059
 being under

00:31:19.059 --> 00:31:19.919
 no necessity

00:31:19.919 --> 00:31:20.459
 but having

00:31:20.459 --> 00:31:20.980
 his desire

00:31:20.980 --> 00:31:21.980
 under control

00:31:21.980 --> 00:31:23.159
 and has determined

00:31:23.159 --> 00:31:24.240
 this in his heart

00:31:24.240 --> 00:31:25.079
 to keep her

00:31:25.079 --> 00:31:26.039
 as his betrothed

00:31:26.039 --> 00:31:27.159
 he will do

00:31:27.159 --> 00:31:27.599
 well

00:31:27.599 --> 00:31:27.980
 right

00:31:27.980 --> 00:31:29.079
 in at least

00:31:29.079 --> 00:31:30.159
 four different ways

00:31:30.159 --> 00:31:31.139
 Paul emphasizes

00:31:31.139 --> 00:31:31.959
 that remaining

00:31:31.959 --> 00:31:32.740
 betrothed

00:31:32.740 --> 00:31:33.660
 and not going

00:31:33.660 --> 00:31:34.240
 through with the

00:31:34.240 --> 00:31:34.599
 marriage

00:31:34.599 --> 00:31:35.700
 has to be

00:31:35.700 --> 00:31:36.339
 the free

00:31:36.339 --> 00:31:37.079
 choice

00:31:37.079 --> 00:31:38.200
 of the

00:31:38.200 --> 00:31:38.759
 individual

00:31:38.759 --> 00:31:39.380
 that's

00:31:39.380 --> 00:31:39.980
 in view

00:31:39.980 --> 00:31:40.539
 right

00:31:40.539 --> 00:31:41.380
 it has to be

00:31:41.380 --> 00:31:41.779
 established

00:31:41.779 --> 00:31:42.680
 in his heart

00:31:42.680 --> 00:31:43.079
 it says

00:31:43.079 --> 00:31:43.819
 he must be

00:31:43.819 --> 00:31:44.420
 under no

00:31:44.420 --> 00:31:45.000
 necessity

00:31:45.000 --> 00:31:45.920
 and it must

00:31:45.920 --> 00:31:46.500
 spring from

00:31:46.500 --> 00:31:47.240
 having his

00:31:47.240 --> 00:31:47.620
 desire

00:31:47.620 --> 00:31:48.500
 under control

00:31:48.500 --> 00:31:49.640
 and he has

00:31:49.640 --> 00:31:49.980
 to have

00:31:49.980 --> 00:31:50.500
 determined

00:31:50.500 --> 00:31:51.039
 this in

00:31:51.039 --> 00:31:51.539
 his

00:31:51.539 --> 00:31:52.440
 heart

00:31:52.440 --> 00:31:53.579
 so if

00:31:53.579 --> 00:31:54.500
 if he has

00:31:54.500 --> 00:31:54.900
 his desire

00:31:54.900 --> 00:31:55.339
 under control

00:31:55.339 --> 00:31:55.740
 then he can

00:31:55.740 --> 00:31:56.160
 choose to

00:31:56.160 --> 00:31:56.620
 keep his

00:31:56.620 --> 00:31:57.339
 fiancee

00:31:57.339 --> 00:31:58.000
 a virgin

00:31:58.000 --> 00:31:58.819
 by not going

00:31:58.819 --> 00:31:59.299
 through with

00:31:59.299 --> 00:31:59.839
 the marriage

00:31:59.839 --> 00:32:01.179
 and if

00:32:01.179 --> 00:32:01.539
 he does

00:32:01.539 --> 00:32:01.740
 this

00:32:01.740 --> 00:32:02.259
 Paul says

00:32:02.259 --> 00:32:02.899
 he will

00:32:02.899 --> 00:32:03.539
 do well

00:32:03.539 --> 00:32:05.119
 now

00:32:05.119 --> 00:32:06.079
 that's

00:32:06.079 --> 00:32:06.599
 probably

00:32:06.599 --> 00:32:07.399
 some of you

00:32:07.399 --> 00:32:07.740
 guys are probably

00:32:07.740 --> 00:32:08.279
 breathing a sigh

00:32:08.279 --> 00:32:08.720
 of relief

00:32:08.720 --> 00:32:09.259
 like okay

00:32:09.259 --> 00:32:10.539
 now I don't

00:32:10.539 --> 00:32:11.000
 have to feel

00:32:11.000 --> 00:32:11.519
 pressure to

00:32:11.519 --> 00:32:12.859
 stay single

00:32:12.859 --> 00:32:13.919
 Sean's not

00:32:13.919 --> 00:32:14.139
 going to

00:32:14.139 --> 00:32:14.579
 pressure me

00:32:14.579 --> 00:32:15.059
 into breaking

00:32:15.059 --> 00:32:15.619
 up with my

00:32:15.619 --> 00:32:16.119
 boyfriend or

00:32:16.119 --> 00:32:16.419
 girlfriend

00:32:16.419 --> 00:32:18.299
 but I don't

00:32:18.299 --> 00:32:19.019
 want you to

00:32:19.019 --> 00:32:20.279
 dismiss all of

00:32:20.279 --> 00:32:20.799
 Paul's teaching

00:32:20.799 --> 00:32:21.159
 up to this

00:32:21.159 --> 00:32:21.459
 point

00:32:21.459 --> 00:32:22.619
 all of a

00:32:22.619 --> 00:32:22.819
 sudden

00:32:22.819 --> 00:32:23.439
 because

00:32:23.439 --> 00:32:24.379
 sometimes people

00:32:24.379 --> 00:32:25.319
 mistakenly think

00:32:25.319 --> 00:32:25.839
 that the gift

00:32:25.839 --> 00:32:26.519
 of celibacy

00:32:26.519 --> 00:32:27.639
 means having

00:32:27.639 --> 00:32:28.339
 no sexual

00:32:28.339 --> 00:32:28.740
 desire

00:32:28.740 --> 00:32:29.400
 like being

00:32:29.400 --> 00:32:30.099
 asexual

00:32:30.099 --> 00:32:31.120
 but I don't

00:32:31.120 --> 00:32:31.720
 think that's

00:32:31.720 --> 00:32:32.359
 what it means

00:32:32.359 --> 00:32:33.559
 because it

00:32:33.559 --> 00:32:33.940
 says it

00:32:33.940 --> 00:32:34.519
 talks about

00:32:34.519 --> 00:32:36.059
 people who

00:32:36.059 --> 00:32:36.460
 should marry

00:32:36.460 --> 00:32:37.599
 if their

00:32:37.599 --> 00:32:38.039
 passions are

00:32:38.039 --> 00:32:38.640
 strong they

00:32:38.640 --> 00:32:39.000
 should marry

00:32:39.000 --> 00:32:39.859
 but if they

00:32:39.859 --> 00:32:40.339
 have their

00:32:40.339 --> 00:32:41.140
 desire under

00:32:41.140 --> 00:32:41.960
 control that

00:32:41.960 --> 00:32:42.319
 they should

00:32:42.319 --> 00:32:43.180
 remain celibate

00:32:43.180 --> 00:32:44.279
 so the fact

00:32:44.279 --> 00:32:44.799
 that people

00:32:44.799 --> 00:32:45.359
 who are to

00:32:45.359 --> 00:32:46.140
 remain celibate

00:32:46.140 --> 00:32:46.500
 have their

00:32:46.500 --> 00:32:47.400
 desires under

00:32:47.400 --> 00:32:48.620
 control means

00:32:48.620 --> 00:32:49.259
 that they have

00:32:49.259 --> 00:32:49.759
 desires

00:32:49.759 --> 00:32:50.759
 it doesn't

00:32:50.759 --> 00:32:51.220
 mean that you

00:32:51.220 --> 00:32:51.660
 have no

00:32:51.660 --> 00:32:52.339
 desire it

00:32:52.339 --> 00:32:52.819
 means that you

00:32:52.819 --> 00:32:53.559
 have a moderate

00:32:53.559 --> 00:32:54.420
 desire that

00:32:54.420 --> 00:32:55.120
 you're able to

00:32:55.120 --> 00:32:55.680
 keep under

00:32:55.680 --> 00:32:56.420
 self-control

00:32:56.420 --> 00:32:57.259
 that's what it

00:32:57.259 --> 00:32:57.779
 means to have

00:32:57.779 --> 00:32:58.420
 the gift of

00:32:58.420 --> 00:32:58.980
 celibacy

00:32:58.980 --> 00:33:03.039
 so that

00:33:03.039 --> 00:33:04.180
 means if

00:33:04.180 --> 00:33:04.820
 you have

00:33:04.820 --> 00:33:05.500
 that gift

00:33:05.500 --> 00:33:07.480
 if you don't

00:33:07.480 --> 00:33:08.259
 feel that it

00:33:08.259 --> 00:33:09.240
 has to be

00:33:09.240 --> 00:33:10.140
 if you have

00:33:10.140 --> 00:33:10.580
 your desires

00:33:10.580 --> 00:33:11.240
 under control

00:33:11.240 --> 00:33:11.940
 then you should

00:33:11.940 --> 00:33:13.200
 seriously consider

00:33:13.200 --> 00:33:13.700
 singleness

00:33:13.700 --> 00:33:15.640
 as a way of

00:33:15.640 --> 00:33:16.560
 promoting singular

00:33:16.560 --> 00:33:17.500
 devotion to God

00:33:17.500 --> 00:33:19.000
 and Paul sums

00:33:19.000 --> 00:33:19.539
 it up this way

00:33:19.539 --> 00:33:20.340
 in verse 38

00:33:20.340 --> 00:33:21.019
 so then

00:33:21.019 --> 00:33:22.200
 he who marries

00:33:22.200 --> 00:33:23.140
 his betrothed

00:33:23.140 --> 00:33:24.200
 does well

00:33:24.200 --> 00:33:25.740
 and he who

00:33:25.740 --> 00:33:26.559
 refrains

00:33:26.559 --> 00:33:27.160
 from marriage

00:33:27.160 --> 00:33:27.720
 will do

00:33:27.720 --> 00:33:28.960
 even better

00:33:28.960 --> 00:33:31.000
 marriage

00:33:31.000 --> 00:33:32.000
 is good

00:33:32.000 --> 00:33:33.120
 to marry

00:33:33.120 --> 00:33:33.600
 is not

00:33:33.600 --> 00:33:34.120
 sin

00:33:34.120 --> 00:33:34.819
 and marriage

00:33:34.819 --> 00:33:35.440
 too is a

00:33:35.440 --> 00:33:35.900
 gift from

00:33:35.900 --> 00:33:36.220
 God

00:33:36.220 --> 00:33:37.240
 but singleness

00:33:37.240 --> 00:33:38.279
 is better

00:33:38.279 --> 00:33:38.920
 Paul says

00:33:38.920 --> 00:33:39.880
 singleness

00:33:39.880 --> 00:33:40.680
 is a blessing

00:33:40.680 --> 00:33:41.500
 from God

00:33:41.500 --> 00:33:41.940
 in which we

00:33:41.940 --> 00:33:42.519
 can please

00:33:42.519 --> 00:33:43.019
 the Lord

00:33:43.019 --> 00:33:44.819
 then having

00:33:44.819 --> 00:33:45.339
 addressed

00:33:45.339 --> 00:33:46.460
 the betrothed

00:33:46.460 --> 00:33:46.920
 singles

00:33:46.920 --> 00:33:47.240
 who are

00:33:47.240 --> 00:33:47.720
 engaged

00:33:47.720 --> 00:33:48.619
 Paul's mind

00:33:48.619 --> 00:33:49.400
 returns once

00:33:49.400 --> 00:33:50.079
 again to

00:33:50.079 --> 00:33:50.720
 women who

00:33:50.720 --> 00:33:51.279
 were formerly

00:33:51.279 --> 00:33:51.819
 married but

00:33:51.819 --> 00:33:52.139
 are now

00:33:52.139 --> 00:33:52.519
 single

00:33:52.519 --> 00:33:53.539
 whom he had

00:33:53.539 --> 00:33:54.000
 specifically

00:33:54.000 --> 00:33:54.559
 addressed in

00:33:54.559 --> 00:33:55.200
 verses 8 to

00:33:55.200 --> 00:33:55.460
 9

00:33:55.460 --> 00:33:56.420
 he says in

00:33:56.420 --> 00:33:57.139
 verse 39

00:33:57.140 --> 00:33:58.180
 a wife is

00:33:58.180 --> 00:33:58.820
 bound to

00:33:58.820 --> 00:33:59.380
 her husband

00:33:59.380 --> 00:34:00.100
 as long

00:34:00.100 --> 00:34:00.480
 as he

00:34:00.480 --> 00:34:00.940
 lives

00:34:00.940 --> 00:34:01.620
 but if

00:34:01.620 --> 00:34:02.120
 her husband

00:34:02.120 --> 00:34:02.620
 dies

00:34:02.620 --> 00:34:03.020
 she is

00:34:03.020 --> 00:34:03.460
 free to

00:34:03.460 --> 00:34:03.860
 be married

00:34:03.860 --> 00:34:04.200
 to whom

00:34:04.200 --> 00:34:04.880
 she wishes

00:34:04.880 --> 00:34:05.880
 only in

00:34:05.880 --> 00:34:06.300
 the Lord

00:34:06.300 --> 00:34:07.080
 so here

00:34:07.080 --> 00:34:07.600
 Paul's

00:34:07.600 --> 00:34:08.320
 reiterating

00:34:08.320 --> 00:34:08.800
 Christ's

00:34:08.800 --> 00:34:09.119
 teaching

00:34:09.119 --> 00:34:10.079
 from Luke

00:34:10.079 --> 00:34:10.460
 16

00:34:10.460 --> 00:34:10.760
 18

00:34:10.760 --> 00:34:11.360
 and elsewhere

00:34:11.360 --> 00:34:12.260
 that everyone

00:34:12.260 --> 00:34:12.960
 who divorces

00:34:12.960 --> 00:34:13.460
 his wife

00:34:13.460 --> 00:34:14.019
 and marries

00:34:14.019 --> 00:34:14.420
 another

00:34:14.420 --> 00:34:14.780
 commits

00:34:14.780 --> 00:34:15.300
 adultery

00:34:15.300 --> 00:34:15.900
 and who

00:34:15.900 --> 00:34:16.300
 marries

00:34:16.300 --> 00:34:16.680
 a woman

00:34:16.680 --> 00:34:17.119
 divorced

00:34:17.119 --> 00:34:17.539
 from her

00:34:17.539 --> 00:34:17.820
 husband

00:34:17.820 --> 00:34:18.220
 commits

00:34:18.220 --> 00:34:18.740
 adultery

00:34:18.740 --> 00:34:19.280
 so

00:34:19.280 --> 00:34:19.920
 remarriage

00:34:19.920 --> 00:34:20.260
 while

00:34:20.260 --> 00:34:20.680
 one's

00:34:20.680 --> 00:34:20.960
 former

00:34:20.960 --> 00:34:21.440
 spouse

00:34:21.440 --> 00:34:22.280
 is alive

00:34:22.280 --> 00:34:23.059
 constitutes

00:34:23.059 --> 00:34:23.619
 adultery

00:34:23.619 --> 00:34:24.140
 because while

00:34:24.140 --> 00:34:24.559
 the marriage

00:34:24.559 --> 00:34:25.220
 vows might

00:34:25.220 --> 00:34:25.720
 be broken

00:34:25.720 --> 00:34:26.420
 the marriage

00:34:26.420 --> 00:34:26.920
 bond

00:34:26.920 --> 00:34:27.599
 cannot be

00:34:27.599 --> 00:34:27.860
 broken

00:34:27.860 --> 00:34:28.200
 because it

00:34:28.200 --> 00:34:28.700
 was forged

00:34:28.700 --> 00:34:29.639
 by God

00:34:29.639 --> 00:34:30.099
 himself

00:34:30.099 --> 00:34:30.400
 to be

00:34:30.400 --> 00:34:30.700
 binding

00:34:30.700 --> 00:34:31.240
 for life

00:34:31.240 --> 00:34:32.019
 but if

00:34:32.019 --> 00:34:32.519
 her husband

00:34:32.519 --> 00:34:33.180
 dies

00:34:33.180 --> 00:34:33.780
 he says

00:34:33.780 --> 00:34:34.440
 she is

00:34:34.440 --> 00:34:35.019
 free to

00:34:35.019 --> 00:34:35.440
 be married

00:34:35.440 --> 00:34:35.820
 to whom

00:34:35.820 --> 00:34:36.300
 she wishes

00:34:36.300 --> 00:34:37.200
 only in

00:34:37.200 --> 00:34:37.659
 the Lord

00:34:37.659 --> 00:34:38.480
 so in

00:34:38.480 --> 00:34:38.920
 the case

00:34:38.920 --> 00:34:39.559
 of widows

00:34:39.559 --> 00:34:40.019
 marriage

00:34:40.019 --> 00:34:40.639
 is an

00:34:40.639 --> 00:34:40.940
 option

00:34:40.940 --> 00:34:41.220
 on the

00:34:41.220 --> 00:34:41.599
 table

00:34:41.599 --> 00:34:42.400
 in the

00:34:42.400 --> 00:34:42.880
 same way

00:34:42.880 --> 00:34:43.119
 it is

00:34:43.119 --> 00:34:43.599
 for singles

00:34:43.599 --> 00:34:43.980
 and that's

00:34:43.980 --> 00:34:44.400
 why Paul

00:34:44.400 --> 00:34:44.880
 mentions

00:34:44.880 --> 00:34:45.159
 them

00:34:45.159 --> 00:34:47.180
 and in

00:34:47.180 --> 00:34:47.639
 this short

00:34:47.639 --> 00:34:48.159
 sentence

00:34:48.159 --> 00:34:48.960
 Paul offers

00:34:48.960 --> 00:34:49.519
 two really

00:34:49.519 --> 00:34:50.220
 helpful clues

00:34:50.220 --> 00:34:50.980
 as to how

00:34:50.980 --> 00:34:51.980
 eligible singles

00:34:51.980 --> 00:34:52.740
 are supposed

00:34:52.740 --> 00:34:53.260
 to pursue

00:34:53.260 --> 00:34:53.659
 marriage

00:34:53.659 --> 00:34:54.740
 and this is

00:34:54.740 --> 00:34:55.260
 really as

00:34:55.260 --> 00:34:56.039
 close as

00:34:56.039 --> 00:34:56.380
 scripture

00:34:56.380 --> 00:34:57.280
 ever comes

00:34:57.280 --> 00:34:57.820
 to offering

00:34:57.820 --> 00:34:58.380
 tips for

00:34:58.380 --> 00:34:58.640
 dating

00:34:58.640 --> 00:34:59.500
 so if you

00:34:59.500 --> 00:34:59.920
 are single

00:34:59.920 --> 00:35:00.200
 and you're

00:35:00.200 --> 00:35:00.579
 interested in

00:35:00.579 --> 00:35:01.019
 this please

00:35:01.019 --> 00:35:02.300
 listen up

00:35:02.300 --> 00:35:03.160
 carefully

00:35:03.160 --> 00:35:03.820
 first Paul

00:35:03.820 --> 00:35:04.420
 says this

00:35:04.420 --> 00:35:05.300
 she is free

00:35:05.300 --> 00:35:05.960
 to be married

00:35:05.960 --> 00:35:06.720
 to whom

00:35:06.720 --> 00:35:07.700
 she wishes

00:35:07.700 --> 00:35:08.780
 right

00:35:08.780 --> 00:35:09.720
 here's a

00:35:09.720 --> 00:35:10.539
 biblical precedent

00:35:10.539 --> 00:35:11.800
 for the idea

00:35:11.800 --> 00:35:12.300
 that you should

00:35:12.300 --> 00:35:13.000
 marry someone

00:35:13.000 --> 00:35:13.539
 you love

00:35:13.539 --> 00:35:14.099
 right

00:35:14.099 --> 00:35:15.599
 someone you

00:35:15.599 --> 00:35:16.239
 want to

00:35:16.239 --> 00:35:16.519
 marry

00:35:16.519 --> 00:35:17.259
 right

00:35:17.259 --> 00:35:18.380
 and notice

00:35:18.380 --> 00:35:18.800
 that Paul

00:35:18.800 --> 00:35:19.460
 offers this

00:35:19.460 --> 00:35:20.000
 prerogative

00:35:20.000 --> 00:35:20.800
 to woman

00:35:20.800 --> 00:35:22.039
 which is

00:35:22.039 --> 00:35:22.579
 radically

00:35:22.579 --> 00:35:23.099
 progressive

00:35:23.099 --> 00:35:23.440
 for its

00:35:23.440 --> 00:35:23.739
 time

00:35:23.739 --> 00:35:24.320
 unheard

00:35:24.320 --> 00:35:24.539
 of

00:35:24.539 --> 00:35:24.920
 in the

00:35:24.920 --> 00:35:25.079
 Roman

00:35:25.079 --> 00:35:25.420
 Empire

00:35:25.420 --> 00:35:26.500
 and notice

00:35:26.500 --> 00:35:27.579
 this point

00:35:27.579 --> 00:35:28.079
 Paul had

00:35:28.079 --> 00:35:28.900
 focused a lot

00:35:28.900 --> 00:35:29.139
 of his

00:35:29.139 --> 00:35:29.719
 injunctions

00:35:29.719 --> 00:35:30.519
 on men

00:35:30.519 --> 00:35:31.440
 because men

00:35:31.440 --> 00:35:32.159
 were expected

00:35:32.159 --> 00:35:32.639
 to take

00:35:32.639 --> 00:35:33.219
 the initiative

00:35:33.219 --> 00:35:33.679
 and to

00:35:33.679 --> 00:35:34.599
 provide

00:35:34.599 --> 00:35:35.119
 leadership

00:35:35.119 --> 00:35:35.779
 when it

00:35:35.779 --> 00:35:36.320
 comes to

00:35:36.320 --> 00:35:36.779
 pursuing

00:35:36.779 --> 00:35:37.279
 engagement

00:35:37.279 --> 00:35:37.739
 in marriage

00:35:37.739 --> 00:35:38.459
 but this

00:35:38.459 --> 00:35:38.839
 does not

00:35:38.839 --> 00:35:39.199
 mean that

00:35:39.199 --> 00:35:39.500
 the woman

00:35:39.500 --> 00:35:39.959
 had no

00:35:39.959 --> 00:35:40.439
 choice

00:35:40.439 --> 00:35:41.159
 she is

00:35:41.159 --> 00:35:41.519
 to marry

00:35:41.519 --> 00:35:42.019
 whom

00:35:42.019 --> 00:35:42.439
 she

00:35:42.439 --> 00:35:43.119
 wishes

00:35:43.119 --> 00:35:43.759
 right

00:35:43.759 --> 00:35:45.000
 in a now

00:35:45.000 --> 00:35:45.539
 classic

00:35:45.539 --> 00:35:45.939
 article

00:35:45.939 --> 00:35:46.500
 entitled

00:35:46.500 --> 00:35:47.339
 the age

00:35:47.339 --> 00:35:47.759
 of Roman

00:35:47.759 --> 00:35:48.219
 girls

00:35:48.219 --> 00:35:49.000
 at marriage

00:35:49.000 --> 00:35:49.599
 this was

00:35:49.599 --> 00:35:49.879
 published

00:35:49.879 --> 00:35:50.819
 in 1965

00:35:50.819 --> 00:35:51.500
 by a

00:35:51.500 --> 00:35:51.879
 historical

00:35:51.879 --> 00:35:52.479
 demographer

00:35:52.479 --> 00:35:53.059
 named

00:35:53.059 --> 00:35:53.399
 Keith

00:35:53.399 --> 00:35:53.799
 Hopkins

00:35:53.799 --> 00:35:54.659
 he

00:35:54.659 --> 00:35:55.119
 noted

00:35:55.119 --> 00:35:55.339
 that

00:35:55.339 --> 00:35:55.679
 most

00:35:55.679 --> 00:35:56.079
 Roman

00:35:56.079 --> 00:35:56.559
 marriages

00:35:56.559 --> 00:35:57.319
 involved

00:35:57.319 --> 00:35:58.199
 prepubescent

00:35:58.199 --> 00:35:58.619
 girls

00:35:58.619 --> 00:35:59.399
 around the

00:35:59.399 --> 00:35:59.759
 age of

00:35:59.759 --> 00:36:00.119
 12

00:36:00.119 --> 00:36:00.939
 or younger

00:36:00.939 --> 00:36:02.019
 and they

00:36:02.019 --> 00:36:02.399
 were given

00:36:02.399 --> 00:36:02.819
 away in

00:36:02.819 --> 00:36:03.079
 marriage

00:36:03.079 --> 00:36:03.500
 to much

00:36:03.500 --> 00:36:04.319
 older men

00:36:04.319 --> 00:36:04.979
 that was

00:36:04.979 --> 00:36:05.379
 common

00:36:05.379 --> 00:36:05.779
 practice

00:36:05.779 --> 00:36:06.079
 in the

00:36:06.079 --> 00:36:06.279
 Roman

00:36:06.279 --> 00:36:06.639
 Empire

00:36:06.639 --> 00:36:07.699
 but when

00:36:07.699 --> 00:36:08.239
 he parsed

00:36:08.239 --> 00:36:08.579
 out the

00:36:08.579 --> 00:36:08.799
 Roman

00:36:08.799 --> 00:36:09.339
 marriages

00:36:09.339 --> 00:36:10.199
 according

00:36:10.199 --> 00:36:10.799
 to their

00:36:10.799 --> 00:36:11.259
 religious

00:36:11.259 --> 00:36:12.099
 affiliation

00:36:12.099 --> 00:36:13.079
 he found

00:36:13.079 --> 00:36:13.579
 out that

00:36:13.579 --> 00:36:14.099
 Christian

00:36:14.099 --> 00:36:14.539
 women in

00:36:14.539 --> 00:36:14.859
 the Roman

00:36:14.859 --> 00:36:15.319
 Empire

00:36:15.319 --> 00:36:16.199
 were three

00:36:16.199 --> 00:36:17.000
 times as

00:36:17.000 --> 00:36:17.960
 less likely

00:36:17.960 --> 00:36:18.839
 to have

00:36:18.839 --> 00:36:19.460
 married by

00:36:19.460 --> 00:36:19.920
 the age

00:36:19.920 --> 00:36:20.559
 of 13

00:36:20.559 --> 00:36:21.139
 right

00:36:21.139 --> 00:36:22.839
 they had

00:36:22.839 --> 00:36:23.379
 much more

00:36:23.379 --> 00:36:23.940
 choice in

00:36:23.940 --> 00:36:24.239
 the matter

00:36:24.239 --> 00:36:24.659
 and they

00:36:24.659 --> 00:36:25.480
 married far

00:36:25.480 --> 00:36:26.299
 later than

00:36:26.299 --> 00:36:26.879
 people in

00:36:26.879 --> 00:36:27.619
 the typical

00:36:27.619 --> 00:36:28.079
 woman in

00:36:28.079 --> 00:36:28.259
 the Roman

00:36:28.259 --> 00:36:28.659
 Empire

00:36:28.659 --> 00:36:29.819
 and that's

00:36:29.819 --> 00:36:30.519
 because of

00:36:30.519 --> 00:36:31.480
 the unprecedented

00:36:31.480 --> 00:36:32.199
 dignity

00:36:32.199 --> 00:36:32.859
 that the

00:36:32.859 --> 00:36:33.719
 church accorded

00:36:33.719 --> 00:36:34.019
 to their

00:36:34.019 --> 00:36:34.359
 woman

00:36:34.359 --> 00:36:35.599
 and because

00:36:35.599 --> 00:36:36.079
 of verses

00:36:36.079 --> 00:36:36.539
 like this

00:36:36.539 --> 00:36:37.300
 that specifically

00:36:37.300 --> 00:36:38.159
 teach that

00:36:38.159 --> 00:36:38.579
 women should

00:36:38.579 --> 00:36:39.059
 marry whom

00:36:39.059 --> 00:36:39.659
 they want

00:36:39.659 --> 00:36:41.480
 many traditional

00:36:41.480 --> 00:36:42.159
 cultures have

00:36:42.159 --> 00:36:43.179
 arranged marriages

00:36:43.179 --> 00:36:43.739
 right because

00:36:43.739 --> 00:36:44.639
 they see marriage

00:36:44.639 --> 00:36:45.539
 as essential

00:36:45.539 --> 00:36:46.579
 and necessary

00:36:46.579 --> 00:36:47.579
 for the

00:36:47.579 --> 00:36:48.099
 upbringing of

00:36:48.099 --> 00:36:48.579
 society

00:36:48.579 --> 00:36:49.500
 but marriage

00:36:49.500 --> 00:36:50.400
 is not

00:36:50.400 --> 00:36:50.980
 essential

00:36:50.980 --> 00:36:52.039
 or necessary

00:36:52.039 --> 00:36:52.800
 for the

00:36:52.800 --> 00:36:53.179
 Christian

00:36:53.179 --> 00:36:54.759
 so you should

00:36:54.759 --> 00:36:55.440
 wait for someone

00:36:55.440 --> 00:36:56.079
 you want to

00:36:56.079 --> 00:36:56.320
 marry

00:36:56.320 --> 00:36:56.940
 that's the

00:36:56.940 --> 00:36:57.360
 first tip

00:36:57.360 --> 00:36:58.800
 then the

00:36:58.800 --> 00:36:59.420
 second guideline

00:36:59.420 --> 00:36:59.960
 is this

00:36:59.960 --> 00:37:01.199
 only in the

00:37:01.199 --> 00:37:01.480
 Lord

00:37:01.480 --> 00:37:03.159
 this is really

00:37:03.159 --> 00:37:03.619
 the only

00:37:03.619 --> 00:37:04.639
 requirement that

00:37:04.639 --> 00:37:05.159
 Paul gives

00:37:05.159 --> 00:37:05.779
 us for

00:37:05.779 --> 00:37:06.239
 your potential

00:37:06.239 --> 00:37:06.579
 spouse

00:37:06.579 --> 00:37:07.179
 he or she

00:37:07.179 --> 00:37:07.779
 must be

00:37:07.779 --> 00:37:08.199
 someone who

00:37:08.199 --> 00:37:08.839
 shares your

00:37:08.839 --> 00:37:09.719
 faith in

00:37:09.719 --> 00:37:10.239
 and your

00:37:10.239 --> 00:37:11.139
 commitment to

00:37:11.139 --> 00:37:11.980
 the Lord

00:37:11.980 --> 00:37:13.420
 note that it

00:37:13.420 --> 00:37:14.219
 doesn't say

00:37:14.219 --> 00:37:15.000
 only those

00:37:15.000 --> 00:37:15.599
 whose bank

00:37:15.599 --> 00:37:16.219
 accounts are

00:37:16.219 --> 00:37:16.599
 full

00:37:16.599 --> 00:37:18.119
 only those

00:37:18.119 --> 00:37:18.619
 who are

00:37:18.619 --> 00:37:19.159
 sufficiently

00:37:19.159 --> 00:37:19.819
 attractive

00:37:19.819 --> 00:37:21.179
 only those

00:37:21.179 --> 00:37:21.480
 who are

00:37:21.480 --> 00:37:21.980
 sufficiently

00:37:21.980 --> 00:37:22.980
 educated

00:37:22.980 --> 00:37:24.219
 Paul says

00:37:24.219 --> 00:37:24.779
 very simply

00:37:24.779 --> 00:37:26.019
 only in

00:37:26.019 --> 00:37:26.879
 the Lord

00:37:26.879 --> 00:37:28.139
 because marriage

00:37:28.139 --> 00:37:28.779
 is to be a

00:37:28.779 --> 00:37:29.879
 picture of the

00:37:29.879 --> 00:37:30.539
 church's union

00:37:30.539 --> 00:37:31.199
 with Christ

00:37:31.199 --> 00:37:32.079
 it will work

00:37:32.079 --> 00:37:32.980
 as God

00:37:32.980 --> 00:37:33.679
 intended it

00:37:33.679 --> 00:37:34.519
 only in so

00:37:34.519 --> 00:37:35.199
 far as you

00:37:35.199 --> 00:37:35.839
 follow in

00:37:35.839 --> 00:37:36.419
 your marriage

00:37:36.419 --> 00:37:37.139
 the pattern

00:37:37.139 --> 00:37:37.799
 of Christ's

00:37:37.799 --> 00:37:38.359
 self-giving

00:37:38.359 --> 00:37:39.639
 love and

00:37:39.639 --> 00:37:40.440
 the church's

00:37:40.440 --> 00:37:41.039
 self-giving

00:37:41.039 --> 00:37:41.579
 submission

00:37:41.579 --> 00:37:43.359
 it's impossible

00:37:43.359 --> 00:37:44.500
 to do this

00:37:44.500 --> 00:37:45.119
 when your spouse

00:37:45.119 --> 00:37:45.859
 doesn't even

00:37:45.859 --> 00:37:46.460
 believe that

00:37:46.460 --> 00:37:47.099
 Christ gave

00:37:47.099 --> 00:37:47.599
 himself for

00:37:47.599 --> 00:37:48.039
 the church

00:37:48.039 --> 00:37:51.039
 so this

00:37:51.039 --> 00:37:51.719
 criterion is

00:37:51.719 --> 00:37:52.199
 critical

00:37:52.199 --> 00:37:52.960
 and think

00:37:52.960 --> 00:37:53.379
 about this

00:37:53.379 --> 00:37:54.019
 if marriage

00:37:54.019 --> 00:37:54.440
 to a

00:37:54.440 --> 00:37:54.980
 Christian

00:37:54.980 --> 00:37:56.059
 divides

00:37:56.059 --> 00:37:56.659
 your

00:37:56.659 --> 00:37:57.339
 interests

00:37:57.339 --> 00:37:57.739
 can you

00:37:57.739 --> 00:37:58.139
 imagine

00:37:58.139 --> 00:37:58.859
 what marriage

00:37:58.859 --> 00:37:59.239
 to an

00:37:59.239 --> 00:37:59.859
 unbeliever

00:37:59.859 --> 00:38:00.519
 will do

00:38:00.519 --> 00:38:03.300
 if you

00:38:03.300 --> 00:38:03.639
 follow

00:38:03.639 --> 00:38:04.159
 scripture's

00:38:04.159 --> 00:38:04.400
 command

00:38:04.400 --> 00:38:04.759
 and seek

00:38:04.759 --> 00:38:05.099
 to marry

00:38:05.099 --> 00:38:05.539
 only in

00:38:05.539 --> 00:38:05.840
 the Lord

00:38:05.840 --> 00:38:06.239
 then there

00:38:06.239 --> 00:38:07.239
 are some

00:38:07.239 --> 00:38:08.059
 more implications

00:38:08.059 --> 00:38:08.460
 for your

00:38:08.460 --> 00:38:09.019
 dating life

00:38:09.019 --> 00:38:09.400
 as well

00:38:09.400 --> 00:38:10.280
 the Bible

00:38:10.280 --> 00:38:10.920
 doesn't have

00:38:10.920 --> 00:38:11.340
 a category

00:38:11.340 --> 00:38:11.820
 for dating

00:38:11.820 --> 00:38:12.360
 because until

00:38:12.360 --> 00:38:13.179
 you're married

00:38:13.179 --> 00:38:14.420
 for all intents

00:38:14.420 --> 00:38:14.860
 and purposes

00:38:14.860 --> 00:38:15.539
 you're single

00:38:15.539 --> 00:38:16.139
 from a biblical

00:38:16.139 --> 00:38:16.800
 point of view

00:38:16.800 --> 00:38:17.860
 and that means

00:38:17.860 --> 00:38:18.519
 because you're

00:38:18.519 --> 00:38:19.400
 not yet married

00:38:19.400 --> 00:38:19.880
 you need to

00:38:19.880 --> 00:38:20.280
 treat your

00:38:20.280 --> 00:38:20.699
 boyfriend

00:38:20.699 --> 00:38:21.320
 or girlfriend

00:38:21.320 --> 00:38:21.980
 as a

00:38:21.980 --> 00:38:22.280
 Christian

00:38:22.280 --> 00:38:22.759
 brother

00:38:22.759 --> 00:38:23.940
 or sister

00:38:23.940 --> 00:38:25.039
 for example

00:38:25.039 --> 00:38:25.420
 1st

00:38:25.420 --> 00:38:26.159
 Timothy 5

00:38:26.159 --> 00:38:26.880
 verse 2

00:38:26.880 --> 00:38:27.480
 teaches us

00:38:27.480 --> 00:38:27.820
 to treat

00:38:27.820 --> 00:38:28.659
 older women

00:38:28.659 --> 00:38:29.139
 in the church

00:38:29.139 --> 00:38:29.820
 as mothers

00:38:29.820 --> 00:38:30.820
 and younger

00:38:30.820 --> 00:38:31.200
 women

00:38:31.200 --> 00:38:32.140
 as sisters

00:38:32.140 --> 00:38:33.220
 in all

00:38:33.220 --> 00:38:33.880
 purity

00:38:33.880 --> 00:38:35.559
 and if

00:38:35.559 --> 00:38:36.019
 that's the

00:38:36.019 --> 00:38:36.300
 case

00:38:36.300 --> 00:38:36.660
 that means

00:38:36.660 --> 00:38:37.300
 you shouldn't

00:38:37.300 --> 00:38:38.160
 do anything

00:38:38.160 --> 00:38:39.320
 to them

00:38:39.320 --> 00:38:40.000
 or with

00:38:40.000 --> 00:38:40.300
 them

00:38:40.300 --> 00:38:40.860
 that you

00:38:40.860 --> 00:38:41.300
 wouldn't

00:38:41.300 --> 00:38:41.700
 do with

00:38:41.700 --> 00:38:42.059
 your own

00:38:42.059 --> 00:38:42.400
 brother

00:38:42.400 --> 00:38:43.019
 or sister

00:38:43.019 --> 00:38:47.019
 they are

00:38:47.019 --> 00:38:47.559
 to be

00:38:47.559 --> 00:38:48.320
 safeguarded

00:38:48.320 --> 00:38:48.680
 in all

00:38:48.680 --> 00:38:49.240
 purity

00:38:49.240 --> 00:38:51.539
 1st

00:38:51.539 --> 00:38:52.000
 Thessalonians

00:38:52.000 --> 00:38:52.360
 4

00:38:52.360 --> 00:38:52.640
 3

00:38:52.640 --> 00:38:53.059
 it teaches

00:38:53.059 --> 00:38:53.260
 that

00:38:53.260 --> 00:38:54.120
 transgressing

00:38:54.120 --> 00:38:54.559
 sexual

00:38:54.559 --> 00:38:54.960
 boundaries

00:38:54.960 --> 00:38:55.440
 with other

00:38:55.440 --> 00:38:55.820
 believers

00:38:55.820 --> 00:38:56.780
 is equivalent

00:38:56.780 --> 00:38:57.760
 to wronging

00:38:57.760 --> 00:38:58.740
 or cheating

00:38:58.740 --> 00:38:59.380
 a brother

00:38:59.380 --> 00:38:59.980
 or sister

00:38:59.980 --> 00:39:01.420
 by depriving

00:39:01.420 --> 00:39:02.059
 one another

00:39:02.059 --> 00:39:02.800
 of God's

00:39:02.800 --> 00:39:03.500
 good design

00:39:03.500 --> 00:39:04.000
 for sex

00:39:04.000 --> 00:39:04.480
 within

00:39:04.480 --> 00:39:05.099
 marriage

00:39:05.099 --> 00:39:06.340
 we defraud

00:39:06.340 --> 00:39:07.099
 exploit

00:39:07.099 --> 00:39:08.220
 and cheat

00:39:08.220 --> 00:39:08.740
 one another

00:39:08.740 --> 00:39:11.579
 so if there's

00:39:11.579 --> 00:39:12.300
 biblical grounds

00:39:12.300 --> 00:39:12.960
 for getting

00:39:12.960 --> 00:39:13.380
 married

00:39:13.380 --> 00:39:14.200
 because your

00:39:14.200 --> 00:39:14.619
 passions are

00:39:14.619 --> 00:39:15.000
 strong

00:39:15.000 --> 00:39:15.700
 then I think

00:39:15.700 --> 00:39:16.160
 there's also

00:39:16.160 --> 00:39:16.940
 biblical grounds

00:39:16.940 --> 00:39:17.740
 for not

00:39:17.740 --> 00:39:18.460
 delaying

00:39:18.460 --> 00:39:18.840
 marriage

00:39:18.840 --> 00:39:19.380
 because your

00:39:19.380 --> 00:39:19.900
 passions are

00:39:19.900 --> 00:39:20.280
 strong

00:39:20.280 --> 00:39:23.260
 if your

00:39:23.260 --> 00:39:23.720
 passions are

00:39:23.720 --> 00:39:23.920
 strong

00:39:23.920 --> 00:39:24.340
 don't let

00:39:24.340 --> 00:39:24.760
 your wedding

00:39:24.760 --> 00:39:25.280
 planning get

00:39:25.280 --> 00:39:25.640
 in the way

00:39:25.640 --> 00:39:26.200
 of a marriage

00:39:26.200 --> 00:39:27.340
 get it done

00:39:27.340 --> 00:39:28.579
 get married

00:39:28.579 --> 00:39:30.740
 finally

00:39:30.740 --> 00:39:31.660
 having offered

00:39:31.660 --> 00:39:32.180
 these guidelines

00:39:32.180 --> 00:39:32.840
 for singles

00:39:32.840 --> 00:39:34.059
 and for seeking

00:39:34.059 --> 00:39:34.460
 marriage

00:39:34.460 --> 00:39:35.340
 Paul returns

00:39:35.340 --> 00:39:36.120
 once again

00:39:36.120 --> 00:39:36.680
 to the main

00:39:36.680 --> 00:39:37.160
 theme of this

00:39:37.160 --> 00:39:37.600
 passage in

00:39:37.600 --> 00:39:38.160
 verse 40

00:39:38.160 --> 00:39:39.380
 yet in my

00:39:39.380 --> 00:39:39.760
 judgment

00:39:39.760 --> 00:39:40.700
 she is happier

00:39:40.700 --> 00:39:41.620
 if she remains

00:39:41.620 --> 00:39:42.519
 as she is

00:39:42.519 --> 00:39:43.280
 and I think

00:39:43.280 --> 00:39:43.920
 that I too

00:39:43.920 --> 00:39:44.620
 have the spirit

00:39:44.620 --> 00:39:45.079
 of God

00:39:45.079 --> 00:39:46.480
 so Paul

00:39:46.480 --> 00:39:47.220
 writes as a

00:39:47.220 --> 00:39:48.019
 spirit inspired

00:39:48.019 --> 00:39:48.559
 apostle

00:39:48.559 --> 00:39:48.980
 that while

00:39:48.980 --> 00:39:49.559
 marriage is a

00:39:49.559 --> 00:39:49.940
 blessing

00:39:49.940 --> 00:39:50.720
 it is more

00:39:50.720 --> 00:39:51.280
 blessed to

00:39:51.280 --> 00:39:52.000
 remain single

00:39:52.000 --> 00:39:52.880
 because singleness

00:39:52.880 --> 00:39:53.480
 is a blessing

00:39:53.480 --> 00:39:53.980
 from God

00:39:53.980 --> 00:39:54.340
 in which we

00:39:54.340 --> 00:39:54.880
 can please

00:39:54.880 --> 00:39:55.700
 the Lord

00:39:55.699 --> 00:39:56.859
 in the Roman

00:39:56.859 --> 00:39:57.319
 Empire

00:39:57.319 --> 00:39:58.000
 the widows

00:39:58.000 --> 00:39:59.039
 faced tremendous

00:39:59.039 --> 00:39:59.779
 pressure to

00:39:59.779 --> 00:40:00.259
 remarry

00:40:00.259 --> 00:40:01.159
 in fact

00:40:01.159 --> 00:40:02.799
 because they

00:40:02.799 --> 00:40:03.579
 had no recourse

00:40:03.579 --> 00:40:04.219
 to survival

00:40:04.219 --> 00:40:05.079
 apart from

00:40:05.079 --> 00:40:05.939
 the income

00:40:05.939 --> 00:40:06.199
 of their

00:40:06.199 --> 00:40:06.500
 husbands

00:40:06.500 --> 00:40:06.980
 in most

00:40:06.980 --> 00:40:07.359
 cases

00:40:07.359 --> 00:40:09.059
 and for

00:40:09.059 --> 00:40:09.599
 that reason

00:40:09.599 --> 00:40:10.099
 actually

00:40:10.099 --> 00:40:12.480
 this Rodney

00:40:12.480 --> 00:40:12.839
 Stark

00:40:12.839 --> 00:40:13.319
 who is an

00:40:13.319 --> 00:40:13.579
 American

00:40:13.579 --> 00:40:14.159
 sociologist

00:40:14.159 --> 00:40:14.439
 who is

00:40:14.439 --> 00:40:14.839
 teaching at

00:40:14.839 --> 00:40:15.019
 Baylor

00:40:15.019 --> 00:40:15.460
 University

00:40:15.460 --> 00:40:15.980
 writes about

00:40:15.980 --> 00:40:16.599
 this reality

00:40:16.599 --> 00:40:18.539
 that Christians

00:40:18.539 --> 00:40:19.059
 the way they

00:40:19.059 --> 00:40:19.500
 treated widows

00:40:19.500 --> 00:40:20.019
 was radically

00:40:20.019 --> 00:40:20.379
 different

00:40:20.379 --> 00:40:20.739
 he says

00:40:20.739 --> 00:40:22.099
 should they

00:40:22.099 --> 00:40:22.619
 be widowed

00:40:22.619 --> 00:40:23.519
 Christian women

00:40:23.519 --> 00:40:24.259
 enjoyed very

00:40:24.259 --> 00:40:24.939
 substantial

00:40:24.939 --> 00:40:25.619
 advantages

00:40:25.619 --> 00:40:26.500
 pagan

00:40:26.500 --> 00:40:26.900
 widows

00:40:26.900 --> 00:40:27.319
 faced

00:40:27.319 --> 00:40:27.679
 great

00:40:27.679 --> 00:40:28.139
 social

00:40:28.139 --> 00:40:28.559
 pressure

00:40:28.559 --> 00:40:28.759
 to

00:40:28.759 --> 00:40:29.179
 remarry

00:40:29.179 --> 00:40:30.139
 Augustus

00:40:30.139 --> 00:40:30.619
 even had

00:40:30.619 --> 00:40:30.920
 widows

00:40:30.920 --> 00:40:31.480
 fined

00:40:31.480 --> 00:40:31.739
 if they

00:40:31.739 --> 00:40:32.059
 failed

00:40:32.059 --> 00:40:32.219
 to

00:40:32.219 --> 00:40:32.500
 remarry

00:40:32.500 --> 00:40:32.799
 within

00:40:32.799 --> 00:40:33.199
 two

00:40:33.199 --> 00:40:33.639
 years

00:40:33.639 --> 00:40:34.539
 of course

00:40:34.539 --> 00:40:34.839
 when a

00:40:34.839 --> 00:40:35.099
 pagan

00:40:35.099 --> 00:40:35.339
 widow

00:40:35.339 --> 00:40:35.719
 did

00:40:35.719 --> 00:40:36.039
 remarry

00:40:36.039 --> 00:40:36.759
 she lost

00:40:36.759 --> 00:40:37.259
 all of

00:40:37.259 --> 00:40:37.359
 her

00:40:37.359 --> 00:40:37.819
 inheritance

00:40:37.819 --> 00:40:38.639
 it became

00:40:38.639 --> 00:40:39.079
 the property

00:40:39.079 --> 00:40:39.299
 of her

00:40:39.299 --> 00:40:39.420
 new

00:40:39.420 --> 00:40:39.779
 husband

00:40:39.779 --> 00:40:40.480
 in

00:40:40.480 --> 00:40:41.299
 contrast

00:40:41.299 --> 00:40:41.900
 among

00:40:41.900 --> 00:40:42.519
 Christians

00:40:42.519 --> 00:40:43.460
 widowhood

00:40:43.460 --> 00:40:44.279
 was highly

00:40:44.279 --> 00:40:44.799
 respected

00:40:44.799 --> 00:40:45.759
 and remarriage

00:40:45.759 --> 00:40:46.519
 was if anything

00:40:46.519 --> 00:40:47.039
 mildly

00:40:47.039 --> 00:40:47.619
 discouraged

00:40:47.619 --> 00:40:48.859
 thus not only

00:40:48.859 --> 00:40:49.639
 were well-to-do

00:40:49.639 --> 00:40:50.380
 Christian widows

00:40:50.380 --> 00:40:50.920
 enabled to

00:40:50.920 --> 00:40:51.559
 keep their

00:40:51.559 --> 00:40:52.079
 husband's

00:40:52.079 --> 00:40:52.460
 estate

00:40:52.460 --> 00:40:53.159
 the church

00:40:53.159 --> 00:40:53.980
 stood ready

00:40:53.980 --> 00:40:54.719
 to sustain

00:40:54.719 --> 00:40:55.639
 poor widows

00:40:55.639 --> 00:40:56.579
 allowing them

00:40:56.579 --> 00:40:57.179
 a choice

00:40:57.179 --> 00:40:57.980
 as to whether

00:40:57.980 --> 00:40:58.500
 or not

00:40:58.500 --> 00:40:59.279
 to remarry

00:40:59.279 --> 00:41:02.079
 why has the

00:41:02.079 --> 00:41:02.799
 church been so

00:41:02.799 --> 00:41:03.459
 different throughout

00:41:03.459 --> 00:41:04.419
 history in the way

00:41:04.419 --> 00:41:05.659
 it treated singles

00:41:05.659 --> 00:41:06.679
 because the Bible

00:41:06.679 --> 00:41:07.819
 teaches that singleness

00:41:07.819 --> 00:41:09.039
 is a blessing from God

00:41:09.039 --> 00:41:09.559
 in which we can

00:41:09.559 --> 00:41:10.259
 please the Lord

00:41:10.259 --> 00:41:12.480
 many in our society

00:41:12.480 --> 00:41:13.159
 view singles

00:41:13.159 --> 00:41:14.219
 with suspicion

00:41:14.219 --> 00:41:15.359
 especially older

00:41:15.359 --> 00:41:15.879
 singles

00:41:15.879 --> 00:41:17.480
 and in fact

00:41:17.480 --> 00:41:18.299
 there's now a term

00:41:18.299 --> 00:41:19.239
 for this I found out

00:41:19.239 --> 00:41:20.319
 social scientist

00:41:20.319 --> 00:41:21.179
 Bella DePaulo

00:41:21.179 --> 00:41:21.979
 coins the term

00:41:21.979 --> 00:41:22.799
 singlism

00:41:22.799 --> 00:41:24.679
 in her book

00:41:24.679 --> 00:41:25.359
 Singled Out

00:41:25.359 --> 00:41:26.139
 and defines it as

00:41:26.139 --> 00:41:27.299
 the stereotyping

00:41:27.299 --> 00:41:28.419
 and stigmatizing

00:41:28.419 --> 00:41:29.179
 and discrimination

00:41:29.179 --> 00:41:30.159
 of people

00:41:30.159 --> 00:41:30.919
 who are not

00:41:30.919 --> 00:41:31.399
 married

00:41:31.399 --> 00:41:32.859
 but the church

00:41:32.859 --> 00:41:34.159
 consistently

00:41:34.159 --> 00:41:35.199
 and throughout

00:41:35.199 --> 00:41:35.599
 history

00:41:35.599 --> 00:41:36.359
 offered a more

00:41:36.359 --> 00:41:37.059
 positive

00:41:37.059 --> 00:41:38.139
 and sensible

00:41:38.139 --> 00:41:39.139
 view of singleness

00:41:39.139 --> 00:41:40.779
 and it has made

00:41:40.779 --> 00:41:41.639
 the sacrifices

00:41:41.639 --> 00:41:42.339
 necessary

00:41:42.339 --> 00:41:43.299
 to sustain

00:41:43.299 --> 00:41:43.779
 singles

00:41:43.779 --> 00:41:44.079
 in their

00:41:44.079 --> 00:41:44.599
 singlehood

00:41:44.599 --> 00:41:45.779
 we need to

00:41:45.779 --> 00:41:46.359
 recover that

00:41:46.359 --> 00:41:47.259
 idea once again

00:41:47.259 --> 00:41:48.019
 in our generation

00:41:48.019 --> 00:41:50.239
 I know that

00:41:50.239 --> 00:41:50.920
 this is difficult

00:41:50.920 --> 00:41:51.699
 to accept

00:41:51.699 --> 00:41:52.820
 for a lot of you

00:41:52.820 --> 00:41:54.320
 it's so

00:41:54.320 --> 00:41:55.960
 counterintuitive

00:41:55.960 --> 00:41:56.659
 and you will

00:41:56.659 --> 00:41:58.599
 neither believe this

00:41:58.599 --> 00:41:59.860
 nor live by it

00:41:59.860 --> 00:42:00.980
 unless you make

00:42:00.980 --> 00:42:01.679
 sense of it

00:42:01.679 --> 00:42:02.440
 in light of the

00:42:02.440 --> 00:42:03.639
 gospel of Jesus Christ

00:42:03.639 --> 00:42:05.239
 and the reason

00:42:05.239 --> 00:42:05.960
 because the reason

00:42:05.960 --> 00:42:06.699
 why marriage

00:42:06.699 --> 00:42:07.420
 has such

00:42:07.420 --> 00:42:08.699
 an enduring appeal

00:42:08.699 --> 00:42:09.719
 for so many of us

00:42:09.719 --> 00:42:10.340
 is because

00:42:10.340 --> 00:42:11.280
 it is a picture

00:42:11.280 --> 00:42:12.619
 of an ultimate reality

00:42:12.619 --> 00:42:13.639
 of the church's

00:42:13.639 --> 00:42:14.599
 eternal union

00:42:14.599 --> 00:42:15.259
 with Christ

00:42:15.259 --> 00:42:16.259
 union with God

00:42:16.259 --> 00:42:17.159
 so throughout

00:42:17.159 --> 00:42:17.559
 scripture

00:42:17.559 --> 00:42:18.799
 our Lord Jesus Christ

00:42:18.799 --> 00:42:19.519
 is described

00:42:19.519 --> 00:42:20.599
 as the bridegroom

00:42:20.599 --> 00:42:21.519
 that comes to

00:42:21.519 --> 00:42:22.380
 claim her bride

00:42:22.380 --> 00:42:23.059
 which is us

00:42:23.059 --> 00:42:23.699
 the church

00:42:23.699 --> 00:42:25.119
 Ephesians 5

00:42:25.119 --> 00:42:25.759
 25-20

00:42:25.759 --> 00:42:26.559
 described Christ

00:42:26.559 --> 00:42:27.279
 as the husband

00:42:27.279 --> 00:42:29.279
 who sanctified

00:42:29.279 --> 00:42:29.619
 the church

00:42:29.619 --> 00:42:30.599
 to set her apart

00:42:30.599 --> 00:42:31.639
 for himself

00:42:31.639 --> 00:42:32.259
 to be presented

00:42:32.259 --> 00:42:33.239
 to him as a bride

00:42:33.239 --> 00:42:35.000
 Jesus is

00:42:35.000 --> 00:42:35.880
 the prince

00:42:35.880 --> 00:42:36.719
 of peace

00:42:36.719 --> 00:42:37.860
 who slew

00:42:37.860 --> 00:42:38.920
 the great dragon

00:42:38.920 --> 00:42:40.059
 that ancient serpent

00:42:40.059 --> 00:42:40.880
 who is called

00:42:40.880 --> 00:42:41.880
 the devil and Satan

00:42:41.880 --> 00:42:43.679
 and to rescue

00:42:43.679 --> 00:42:44.219
 the church

00:42:44.219 --> 00:42:45.179
 as a bride for himself

00:42:45.179 --> 00:42:45.920
 it's the ultimate

00:42:45.920 --> 00:42:46.500
 fairy tale

00:42:46.500 --> 00:42:47.659
 he's the prince

00:42:47.659 --> 00:42:48.579
 who killed the dragon

00:42:48.579 --> 00:42:49.380
 to get the girl

00:42:49.380 --> 00:42:50.559
 to get the church

00:42:50.559 --> 00:42:51.219
 to claim the bride

00:42:51.219 --> 00:42:51.800
 for himself

00:42:51.800 --> 00:42:53.019
 and he did this

00:42:53.019 --> 00:42:54.219
 by dying on the cross

00:42:54.219 --> 00:42:55.179
 for our sins

00:42:55.179 --> 00:42:56.219
 thereby shattering

00:42:56.219 --> 00:42:57.360
 the chains of sin

00:42:57.360 --> 00:42:58.139
 that held us

00:42:58.139 --> 00:42:59.380
 enslaved to the dragon

00:42:59.380 --> 00:43:00.400
 that he emerged

00:43:00.400 --> 00:43:01.199
 from the grave

00:43:01.199 --> 00:43:01.960
 victoriously

00:43:01.960 --> 00:43:03.239
 and he is now

00:43:03.239 --> 00:43:03.900
 preparing

00:43:03.900 --> 00:43:04.980
 his bride

00:43:04.980 --> 00:43:05.659
 for that great

00:43:05.659 --> 00:43:06.300
 wedding day

00:43:06.300 --> 00:43:07.199
 when our union

00:43:07.199 --> 00:43:07.880
 with Christ

00:43:07.880 --> 00:43:09.280
 will be consummated

00:43:09.280 --> 00:43:10.820
 that's the gospel

00:43:10.820 --> 00:43:11.619
 the good news

00:43:11.619 --> 00:43:12.500
 of Jesus Christ

00:43:12.500 --> 00:43:13.360
 that's why marriage

00:43:13.360 --> 00:43:14.460
 is so glorious

00:43:14.460 --> 00:43:15.179
 because it's supposed

00:43:15.179 --> 00:43:15.599
 to be a picture

00:43:15.599 --> 00:43:16.420
 of that reality

00:43:16.420 --> 00:43:17.840
 but here's why

00:43:17.840 --> 00:43:18.480
 this should fill

00:43:18.480 --> 00:43:18.900
 those of you

00:43:18.900 --> 00:43:19.579
 who are single

00:43:19.579 --> 00:43:20.240
 with hope

00:43:20.240 --> 00:43:21.880
 marriage is a picture

00:43:21.880 --> 00:43:23.340
 of the ultimate reality

00:43:23.340 --> 00:43:24.740
 it's not the ultimate reality

00:43:24.740 --> 00:43:25.300
 itself

00:43:25.300 --> 00:43:26.539
 it's a shadow

00:43:26.539 --> 00:43:27.579
 of what is to come

00:43:27.579 --> 00:43:28.579
 Jesus teaches

00:43:28.579 --> 00:43:29.480
 in Matthew 22

00:43:29.480 --> 00:43:29.900
 to 30

00:43:29.900 --> 00:43:30.740
 in the resurrection

00:43:30.740 --> 00:43:32.119
 they neither marry

00:43:32.119 --> 00:43:32.960
 nor are given

00:43:32.960 --> 00:43:33.460
 in marriage

00:43:33.460 --> 00:43:34.179
 but are like

00:43:34.179 --> 00:43:34.800
 the angels

00:43:34.800 --> 00:43:35.400
 in heaven

00:43:35.400 --> 00:43:37.059
 there's no marriage

00:43:37.059 --> 00:43:37.579
 in heaven

00:43:37.579 --> 00:43:38.340
 because in heaven

00:43:38.340 --> 00:43:39.139
 the eternal

00:43:39.139 --> 00:43:40.280
 spiritual reality

00:43:40.280 --> 00:43:40.820
 that marriage

00:43:40.820 --> 00:43:41.519
 pointed to

00:43:41.519 --> 00:43:42.800
 will be consummated

00:43:42.800 --> 00:43:43.800
 so you no longer

00:43:43.800 --> 00:43:44.600
 need a picture

00:43:44.600 --> 00:43:45.900
 of Christ's love

00:43:45.900 --> 00:43:46.380
 when you come

00:43:46.380 --> 00:43:47.860
 face to faith

00:43:47.860 --> 00:43:48.980
 with Christ himself

00:43:48.980 --> 00:43:51.420
 and because humanity

00:43:51.420 --> 00:43:51.960
 was created

00:43:51.960 --> 00:43:52.680
 for this ultimate

00:43:52.680 --> 00:43:53.620
 relationship with God

00:43:53.620 --> 00:43:54.780
 if you are not yet

00:43:54.780 --> 00:43:55.280
 a follower

00:43:55.280 --> 00:43:56.180
 of Jesus Christ

00:43:56.180 --> 00:43:57.140
 and you are seeking

00:43:57.140 --> 00:43:57.640
 a boyfriend

00:43:57.640 --> 00:43:58.320
 or a girlfriend

00:43:58.320 --> 00:43:58.980
 or a husband

00:43:58.980 --> 00:43:59.560
 or a wife

00:43:59.560 --> 00:44:00.360
 to alleviate

00:44:00.360 --> 00:44:01.160
 your loneliness

00:44:01.160 --> 00:44:02.000
 and satisfy

00:44:02.000 --> 00:44:02.640
 your longing

00:44:02.640 --> 00:44:03.260
 for love

00:44:03.260 --> 00:44:04.560
 and companionship

00:44:04.560 --> 00:44:05.480
 then you're putting

00:44:05.480 --> 00:44:06.800
 an eternal weight

00:44:06.800 --> 00:44:08.480
 on a temporal reality

00:44:08.480 --> 00:44:10.140
 and your expectations

00:44:10.140 --> 00:44:11.240
 will crumble

00:44:11.240 --> 00:44:12.039
 under the pressure

00:44:12.039 --> 00:44:13.940
 turn to Christ

00:44:13.940 --> 00:44:14.279
 today

00:44:14.279 --> 00:44:15.320
 and you will

00:44:15.320 --> 00:44:15.759
 experience

00:44:15.759 --> 00:44:16.639
 the foretaste

00:44:16.639 --> 00:44:17.079
 today

00:44:17.079 --> 00:44:18.460
 of that eternal

00:44:18.460 --> 00:44:19.639
 union with God

00:44:19.639 --> 00:44:21.559
 and if you are

00:44:21.559 --> 00:44:22.259
 already a follower

00:44:22.259 --> 00:44:22.719
 of Christ

00:44:22.719 --> 00:44:23.480
 and you are single

00:44:23.480 --> 00:44:24.119
 then you are to

00:44:24.119 --> 00:44:25.480
 skip the picture

00:44:25.480 --> 00:44:26.159
 so to speak

00:44:26.159 --> 00:44:27.099
 to be devoted

00:44:27.099 --> 00:44:28.179
 to God entirely

00:44:28.179 --> 00:44:28.920
 and exclusively

00:44:28.920 --> 00:44:30.039
 as we will be

00:44:30.039 --> 00:44:30.480
 in heaven

00:44:30.480 --> 00:44:32.059
 you are to find

00:44:32.059 --> 00:44:33.059
 companionship

00:44:33.059 --> 00:44:34.340
 and support

00:44:34.340 --> 00:44:35.779
 not in forming

00:44:35.779 --> 00:44:36.840
 a biological family

00:44:36.840 --> 00:44:37.420
 but in your

00:44:37.420 --> 00:44:38.460
 spiritual family

00:44:38.460 --> 00:44:39.519
 the church

00:44:39.519 --> 00:44:41.460
 you are to focus

00:44:41.460 --> 00:44:42.800
 on propagating

00:44:42.800 --> 00:44:43.820
 spiritual children

00:44:43.820 --> 00:44:44.280
 of God

00:44:44.280 --> 00:44:45.159
 through the

00:44:45.159 --> 00:44:45.920
 proclamation

00:44:45.920 --> 00:44:46.619
 of the gospel

00:44:46.619 --> 00:44:47.800
 rather than focusing

00:44:47.800 --> 00:44:48.619
 on propagating

00:44:48.619 --> 00:44:49.639
 biological children

00:44:49.639 --> 00:44:50.699
 through sexual intercourse

00:44:50.699 --> 00:44:52.780
 you are to be

00:44:52.780 --> 00:44:54.199
 a daily reminder

00:44:54.199 --> 00:44:55.420
 to all those

00:44:55.420 --> 00:44:56.199
 around you

00:44:56.199 --> 00:44:57.639
 that what gives you

00:44:57.639 --> 00:44:59.119
 true eternal

00:44:59.119 --> 00:44:59.860
 significance

00:44:59.860 --> 00:45:01.300
 is not a man

00:45:01.300 --> 00:45:02.780
 and is not a woman

00:45:02.780 --> 00:45:04.219
 but your relationship

00:45:04.219 --> 00:45:04.940
 with God

00:45:04.940 --> 00:45:06.940
 you are to show

00:45:06.940 --> 00:45:07.900
 by your singleness

00:45:07.900 --> 00:45:08.680
 that the greatest

00:45:08.680 --> 00:45:09.639
 love in the world

00:45:09.639 --> 00:45:10.599
 is not the love

00:45:10.599 --> 00:45:11.340
 between a man

00:45:11.340 --> 00:45:11.820
 and a woman

00:45:11.820 --> 00:45:13.280
 but God's love

00:45:13.280 --> 00:45:13.940
 for his people

00:45:13.940 --> 00:45:16.740
 I know that some

00:45:16.740 --> 00:45:17.119
 of you have

00:45:17.119 --> 00:45:17.940
 strong passions

00:45:17.940 --> 00:45:18.900
 and you deeply

00:45:18.900 --> 00:45:20.019
 desire to get married

00:45:20.019 --> 00:45:21.059
 and you have not

00:45:21.059 --> 00:45:21.599
 been able to

00:45:21.599 --> 00:45:22.139
 some of you

00:45:22.139 --> 00:45:23.680
 but your loneliness

00:45:23.680 --> 00:45:24.880
 might be unbearable

00:45:24.880 --> 00:45:25.460
 at times

00:45:25.460 --> 00:45:26.220
 and you might be

00:45:26.220 --> 00:45:27.360
 overwhelmed by a sense

00:45:27.360 --> 00:45:28.059
 of insecurity

00:45:28.059 --> 00:45:29.039
 and self-doubt

00:45:29.039 --> 00:45:29.800
 that comes with that

00:45:29.800 --> 00:45:30.639
 but remember

00:45:30.639 --> 00:45:31.960
 this truth

00:45:31.960 --> 00:45:33.019
 you will

00:45:33.019 --> 00:45:34.139
 have yourself

00:45:34.139 --> 00:45:35.280
 a wedding day

00:45:35.280 --> 00:45:35.860
 in the end

00:45:35.860 --> 00:45:37.099
 you will have

00:45:37.099 --> 00:45:38.279
 yourself a bridegroom

00:45:38.279 --> 00:45:38.880
 in the end

00:45:38.880 --> 00:45:39.759
 and he is

00:45:39.759 --> 00:45:40.619
 an incomparable

00:45:40.619 --> 00:45:42.199
 and peerless bride

00:45:42.199 --> 00:45:43.880
 bridegroom

00:45:43.880 --> 00:45:45.219
 Isaiah 61 10

00:45:45.219 --> 00:45:45.380
 says

00:45:45.380 --> 00:45:46.119
 I will greatly

00:45:46.119 --> 00:45:47.159
 rejoice in the Lord

00:45:47.159 --> 00:45:48.279
 my soul shall

00:45:48.279 --> 00:45:49.460
 exalt in my God

00:45:49.460 --> 00:45:50.679
 for he has clothed me

00:45:50.679 --> 00:45:51.319
 with the garments

00:45:51.319 --> 00:45:52.199
 of salvation

00:45:52.199 --> 00:45:53.619
 he has covered me

00:45:53.619 --> 00:45:54.239
 with the robe

00:45:54.239 --> 00:45:54.920
 of righteousness

00:45:54.920 --> 00:45:56.239
 as a bridegroom

00:45:56.239 --> 00:45:56.960
 decks himself

00:45:56.960 --> 00:45:57.799
 like a priest

00:45:57.799 --> 00:45:58.839
 with a beautiful

00:45:58.839 --> 00:45:59.480
 headdress

00:45:59.480 --> 00:46:00.739
 and as a bride

00:46:00.739 --> 00:46:01.960
 adorns herself

00:46:01.960 --> 00:46:02.900
 with her jewels

00:46:02.900 --> 00:46:05.039
 even if you

00:46:05.039 --> 00:46:06.180
 never get to have

00:46:06.180 --> 00:46:07.800
 your dream wedding

00:46:07.800 --> 00:46:10.099
 that wedding day

00:46:10.099 --> 00:46:11.260
 will be more beautiful

00:46:11.260 --> 00:46:12.079
 than anything

00:46:12.079 --> 00:46:13.320
 you could have imagined

00:46:13.320 --> 00:46:16.280
 even if you never

00:46:16.280 --> 00:46:17.260
 find a man

00:46:17.260 --> 00:46:17.780
 or a woman

00:46:17.780 --> 00:46:18.400
 to have

00:46:18.400 --> 00:46:19.099
 and to hold

00:46:19.099 --> 00:46:20.240
 Christ will be

00:46:20.240 --> 00:46:20.660
 to you

00:46:20.660 --> 00:46:21.579
 a more beautiful

00:46:21.579 --> 00:46:23.200
 more lovely

00:46:23.200 --> 00:46:24.200
 more faithful

00:46:24.200 --> 00:46:25.280
 and true

00:46:25.280 --> 00:46:26.440
 bridegroom

00:46:26.440 --> 00:46:27.079
 than you

00:46:27.079 --> 00:46:28.119
 could have ever

00:46:28.119 --> 00:46:28.900
 hoped for

00:46:28.900 --> 00:46:33.420
 in 1st Samuel 1

00:46:33.420 --> 00:46:34.099
 when Hannah

00:46:34.099 --> 00:46:34.960
 is despondent

00:46:34.960 --> 00:46:35.880
 because she is

00:46:35.880 --> 00:46:36.320
 barren

00:46:36.320 --> 00:46:38.059
 and she is crying

00:46:38.059 --> 00:46:39.860
 and Elkanah

00:46:39.860 --> 00:46:40.420
 her husband

00:46:40.420 --> 00:46:41.099
 says to her

00:46:41.099 --> 00:46:41.440
 Hannah

00:46:41.440 --> 00:46:42.400
 why do you weep

00:46:42.400 --> 00:46:43.539
 and why do you not eat

00:46:43.539 --> 00:46:45.460
 and why is your heart sad

00:46:45.460 --> 00:46:48.360
 am I not more to you

00:46:48.360 --> 00:46:49.480
 than ten sons

00:46:49.480 --> 00:46:52.460
 let me ask you

00:46:52.460 --> 00:46:53.480
 is not Christ

00:46:53.480 --> 00:46:54.300
 more to you

00:46:54.300 --> 00:46:55.059
 than a husband

00:46:55.059 --> 00:46:57.619
 is not Christ

00:46:57.619 --> 00:46:58.300
 more to you

00:46:58.300 --> 00:46:58.940
 than a wife

00:46:58.940 --> 00:47:01.120
 is not Christ

00:47:01.120 --> 00:47:01.960
 more to you

00:47:01.960 --> 00:47:04.220
 than the thousands

00:47:04.220 --> 00:47:06.280
 chiefest among thousands

00:47:06.280 --> 00:47:07.860
 is not Christ

00:47:07.860 --> 00:47:08.460
 more to you

00:47:08.460 --> 00:47:09.760
 than the whole world

00:47:09.760 --> 00:47:10.240
 over

00:47:10.240 --> 00:47:12.960
 let your singleness

00:47:12.960 --> 00:47:13.880
 of devotion

00:47:13.880 --> 00:47:14.420
 to God

00:47:14.420 --> 00:47:15.640
 be so apparent

00:47:15.640 --> 00:47:16.640
 whether you're married

00:47:16.640 --> 00:47:17.140
 or single

00:47:17.140 --> 00:47:18.180
 that the answer

00:47:18.180 --> 00:47:19.320
 to that question

00:47:19.320 --> 00:47:20.420
 is obvious

00:47:20.420 --> 00:47:21.380
 to everybody

00:47:21.380 --> 00:47:22.539
 who knows you

00:47:22.539 --> 00:47:23.840
 and sees you

00:47:23.840 --> 00:47:25.000
 let's pray together

00:47:25.000 --> 00:47:31.760
 God this is

00:47:31.760 --> 00:47:32.960
 a lofty calling

00:47:32.960 --> 00:47:34.880
 to be wholly

00:47:34.880 --> 00:47:35.739
 devoted to you

00:47:35.739 --> 00:47:37.699
 we cannot do it

00:47:37.699 --> 00:47:38.440
 apart from the help

00:47:38.440 --> 00:47:39.039
 of your spirit

00:47:39.039 --> 00:47:41.059
 we cannot do it

00:47:41.059 --> 00:47:42.000
 apart from

00:47:42.000 --> 00:47:43.460
 the love

00:47:43.460 --> 00:47:44.079
 that you revealed

00:47:44.079 --> 00:47:44.599
 in your son

00:47:44.599 --> 00:47:45.320
 Jesus Christ

00:47:45.320 --> 00:47:46.980
 the way in which

00:47:46.980 --> 00:47:47.980
 you loved us first

00:47:47.980 --> 00:47:49.239
 died for us

00:47:49.239 --> 00:47:50.579
 gave yourself for us

00:47:50.579 --> 00:47:52.820
 define us

00:47:52.820 --> 00:47:53.640
 with that love

00:47:53.640 --> 00:47:55.140
 ground us

00:47:55.140 --> 00:47:56.039
 in that love

00:47:56.039 --> 00:47:57.680
 so that we can

00:47:57.680 --> 00:47:58.360
 live

00:47:58.360 --> 00:48:00.059
 in singular

00:48:00.059 --> 00:48:00.600
 devotion

00:48:00.600 --> 00:48:01.440
 to you

00:48:01.440 --> 00:48:02.620
 as your lover

00:48:02.620 --> 00:48:03.880
 as your bride

00:48:03.880 --> 00:48:05.039
 as the church

00:48:05.039 --> 00:48:06.480
 in Jesus name

00:48:06.480 --> 00:48:06.840
 we pray

00:48:06.840 --> 00:48:07.720
 amen

00:48:07.719 --> 00:48:24.859
19

00:48:24.859 --> 00:48:25.099
 peace

00:48:25.099 --> 00:48:25.419
 peace

00:48:25.419 --> 00:48:26.099
 peace

00:48:26.099 --> 00:48:26.539
 peace

00:48:26.539 --> 00:48:27.239
 peace

00:48:27.239 --> 00:48:28.839
 peace

00:48:28.839 --> 00:48:29.679
 peace

00:48:29.679 --> 00:48:30.619
 you

00:48:32.619 --> 00:48:33.459
 peace

00:48:33.459 --> 00:48:33.799
 peace

00:48:33.799 --> 00:48:35.639
 peace

00:48:36.099 --> 00:48:36.159
 peace

00:48:36.159 --> 00:48:36.559
 peace

00:48:36.559 --> 00:48:36.599
 peace

00:48:36.599 --> 00:48:37.619
 peace