WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:11.080 Good morning. My name's Matthew Capone, and I'm one of the pastors here at Cheyenne Mountain Presbyterian Church, and it's my joy to bring God's word to you today. 00:00:11.279 --> 00:00:20.640 We're continuing this morning our series in the book of Genesis. You remember that Genesis is the origin story of God's people, Israel. 00:00:20.640 --> 00:00:28.640 And this summer, we are looking at the story of Isaac and Jacob, mostly Jacob, in chapters 25 through 36. 00:00:29.100 --> 00:00:39.140 And to a certain extent, it's the same theme we saw last year, last summer, in the story of Abraham, which is that we're answering the question, what does it look like to follow God in faith? 00:00:39.679 --> 00:00:45.760 But as I've been telling you, the story of Isaac and Jacob adds some more layers, some new themes that are introduced. 00:00:45.759 --> 00:00:52.199 Last week, we were in chapter 27, where Jacob cheats Esau out of the blessing. 00:00:53.259 --> 00:00:59.539 And so we saw God's work in and through dysfunctional families. 00:01:00.179 --> 00:01:02.979 This week, we're going to continue the story of Jacob. 00:01:03.219 --> 00:01:09.219 The topic this morning's already been introduced with our New Testament reading this morning, and it's this. 00:01:09.219 --> 00:01:15.719 We're going to discuss why Christians should only marry other Christians. 00:01:15.760 --> 00:01:25.140 Now, as I say that, I realize some of you are not married to Christians, and you might be thinking, oh, no, am I going to get beat up on this morning? 00:01:25.400 --> 00:01:29.800 Is this the moment where the pastor criticizes me and shames me? 00:01:30.359 --> 00:01:31.920 That's not our goal. 00:01:31.920 --> 00:01:44.760 It is my job as a pastor to provide warnings from God's word, but it is equally my job to remind you the great hope that we have in any situation because of the power of the gospel. 00:01:45.760 --> 00:01:53.740 And so with that, I invite you to turn with me to Genesis chapter 27, starting at verse 41, which you'll find on page 7 of your worship guide. 00:01:53.900 --> 00:01:56.700 As we turn here, remember that this is God's word. 00:01:57.439 --> 00:02:06.200 And Isaiah chapter 40 tells us, the grass withers and the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever. 00:02:06.200 --> 00:02:11.800 So that's why we read now Genesis chapter 27, starting at verse 41. 00:02:13.199 --> 00:02:18.460 Now Esau hated Jacob because of the blessing with which his father had blessed him. 00:02:19.039 --> 00:02:24.300 And Esau said to himself, the days of mourning for my father are approaching. 00:02:25.000 --> 00:02:27.680 Then I will kill my brother Jacob. 00:02:27.680 --> 00:02:32.240 But the words of Esau, her older son, were told to Rebecca. 00:02:33.180 --> 00:02:36.659 So she sent and called Jacob, her younger son, and said to him, 00:02:37.480 --> 00:02:43.780 Behold, your brother Esau comforts himself about you by planning to kill you. 00:02:45.260 --> 00:02:47.680 Now, therefore, my son, obey my voice. 00:02:48.460 --> 00:02:55.620 Arise, flee to Laban, my brother in Haran, and stay with him a while until your brother's fury turns away. 00:02:55.620 --> 00:03:01.680 Until your brother's anger turns away from you and he forgets what you have done to him. 00:03:02.460 --> 00:03:04.800 Then I will send and bring you from there. 00:03:05.500 --> 00:03:09.319 Why should I be bereft of you both in one day? 00:03:10.319 --> 00:03:17.040 Then Rebecca said to Isaac, I loathe my life because of the Hittite women. 00:03:17.039 --> 00:03:23.639 If Jacob marries one of the Hittite women like these, one of the women of the land, 00:03:24.099 --> 00:03:27.340 what good will my life be to me? 00:03:28.299 --> 00:03:29.479 Chapter 28. 00:03:30.840 --> 00:03:33.780 Then Isaac called Jacob and blessed him and directed him, 00:03:34.340 --> 00:03:37.579 You must not take a wife from the Canaanite women. 00:03:37.580 --> 00:03:42.600 Arise, go to Paddan Aram, to the house of Bethuel, your mother's father, 00:03:42.860 --> 00:03:48.300 and take as your wife from there one of the daughters of Laban, your mother's brother. 00:03:49.340 --> 00:03:53.240 God Almighty bless you and make you fruitful and multiply you, 00:03:53.680 --> 00:03:55.840 that you may become a company of peoples. 00:03:56.860 --> 00:04:01.460 May he give the blessing of Abraham to you and to your offspring with you, 00:04:01.460 --> 00:04:07.560 that you may take possession of the land of your sojournings that God gave to Abraham. 00:04:09.300 --> 00:04:15.740 Thus Isaac sent Jacob away, and he went to Paddan Aram, to Laban, the son of Bethuel the Aramean, 00:04:16.160 --> 00:04:19.939 the brother of Rebekah, Jacob, and Esau's mother. 00:04:21.079 --> 00:04:21.980 Verse 6. 00:04:23.079 --> 00:04:28.840 Now Esau saw that Isaac had blessed Jacob and sent him away to Paddan Aram to take a wife from there. 00:04:28.839 --> 00:04:31.519 And that as he blessed him, he directed him, 00:04:32.099 --> 00:04:34.859 You must not take a wife from the Canaanite women. 00:04:35.599 --> 00:04:39.500 And that Jacob had obeyed his father and his mother and gone to Paddan Aram. 00:04:40.459 --> 00:04:45.019 So when Esau saw that the Canaanite women did not please Isaac his father, 00:04:45.759 --> 00:04:50.899 Esau went to Ishmael and took as his wife, besides the wives he had, 00:04:51.479 --> 00:04:57.279 Mahalath, the daughter of Ishmael, Abraham's son, the sister of Nebaioth. 00:04:57.279 --> 00:05:02.459 I invite you to pray with me as we come to this portion of God's word. 00:05:05.000 --> 00:05:11.379 Our Father in heaven, we do thank you again for your word that speaks life to us, 00:05:11.779 --> 00:05:17.239 that shows us our great need for your mercy and your grace, 00:05:17.619 --> 00:05:22.559 and also assures us that you meet us at that very same place of need. 00:05:22.560 --> 00:05:27.199 We ask this morning that you would show us our need for the gospel. 00:05:28.100 --> 00:05:32.720 Even more, you would highlight your mercy and your grace, 00:05:33.100 --> 00:05:36.879 that you'd be at work in our hearts and our minds by your Holy Spirit, 00:05:37.800 --> 00:05:43.420 growing our love for you and setting our eyes on you more than anything else. 00:05:43.920 --> 00:05:47.300 And we ask all of these things in the mighty name of Jesus Christ. 00:05:47.300 --> 00:05:48.300 Amen. 00:05:50.860 --> 00:05:54.819 We are picking up this morning our story from last week. 00:05:54.900 --> 00:06:02.340 You'll remember in chapter 27, there was this conflict over who would receive the blessing of Isaac. 00:06:02.520 --> 00:06:05.060 Was it going to be the son Jacob or the son Esau? 00:06:05.540 --> 00:06:09.500 Isaac wants the blessing on Esau because Esau is his favorite, 00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:16.519 but Rebecca and Jacob work together to deceive Isaac and actually get the blessing for Jacob. 00:06:16.519 --> 00:06:21.539 And you'll remember we talked about the fact that everyone behaves poorly. 00:06:22.060 --> 00:06:27.899 The consequences of all of that are significant, and there are three consequences right away. 00:06:28.699 --> 00:06:33.219 First, Esau wants to kill Jacob. 00:06:34.079 --> 00:06:37.120 See that in chapter 27, verse 41. 00:06:37.919 --> 00:06:42.859 Now Esau hated Jacob because of the blessing with which his father had blessed him. 00:06:42.860 --> 00:06:44.740 And Esau said to himself, 00:06:45.680 --> 00:06:48.180 The days of mourning for my father are approaching. 00:06:48.560 --> 00:06:51.740 Then I will kill my brother Jacob. 00:06:52.259 --> 00:06:56.199 So in other words, he's not going to kill Jacob until Isaac dies. 00:06:56.300 --> 00:07:00.060 And I mentioned last week that it's actually going to be 20 plus years. 00:07:00.199 --> 00:07:04.520 It's not till Genesis chapter 35 that Isaac actually dies. 00:07:04.519 --> 00:07:08.519 But the consequence one then is Esau is out for blood. 00:07:09.419 --> 00:07:14.459 That leads to consequence two, which is that Jacob must flee. 00:07:15.019 --> 00:07:16.419 That takes us to verse 42. 00:07:16.979 --> 00:07:24.459 Rebecca finds out about Esau's plan, and she once again, as she always does, has a plan of her own. 00:07:25.099 --> 00:07:27.919 So she tells Jacob, look, run away to my uncle. 00:07:28.039 --> 00:07:28.759 Run away to Laban. 00:07:28.859 --> 00:07:31.799 He will protect you and just hide out there. 00:07:31.939 --> 00:07:33.500 Let everything calm down. 00:07:33.500 --> 00:07:38.100 And when the temperature is lower here, I will send for you. 00:07:38.899 --> 00:07:45.040 Now if you're familiar with the story of Genesis, you know she never sends for him. 00:07:45.920 --> 00:07:47.180 That's consequence three. 00:07:48.379 --> 00:07:51.879 Rebecca loses her favorite son. 00:07:53.040 --> 00:07:54.839 So one, Esau wants to kill Jacob. 00:07:55.000 --> 00:07:56.639 Two, Jacob therefore needs to three. 00:07:56.800 --> 00:07:58.160 And Jacob has to flee. 00:07:58.339 --> 00:08:01.019 Therefore, number three, Rebecca loses Jacob. 00:08:01.019 --> 00:08:04.180 And that's just a review of what we saw last week. 00:08:04.259 --> 00:08:09.680 I told you the scheming, the lying, ends up hurting everyone. 00:08:10.799 --> 00:08:13.099 Doesn't lead to any good. 00:08:13.959 --> 00:08:14.819 And so I'll tell you this. 00:08:14.939 --> 00:08:16.979 I promise for the last time for a little bit. 00:08:17.279 --> 00:08:18.719 Page eight of your worship guide. 00:08:18.799 --> 00:08:20.419 I've mentioned this two times recently. 00:08:20.420 --> 00:08:21.939 This quote from Crime and Punishment. 00:08:22.860 --> 00:08:28.660 Your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing. 00:08:29.640 --> 00:08:31.600 And the book of Genesis is trying to make that clear for us. 00:08:31.640 --> 00:08:35.460 Look, it's actually in God's glory that we discover our good. 00:08:36.139 --> 00:08:39.659 All this running around, disobeying God's commands and laws, 00:08:39.659 --> 00:08:43.939 it doesn't just offend him, it also hurts you. 00:08:45.279 --> 00:08:48.439 Sin never pays. 00:08:49.559 --> 00:08:50.419 Never pays. 00:08:51.679 --> 00:08:54.740 This leads us into the narrative about marriage. 00:08:55.039 --> 00:08:58.500 You'll notice that Rebecca is very crafty here. 00:08:58.740 --> 00:09:01.480 She goes to Isaac and she does not say, 00:09:01.879 --> 00:09:05.740 hey, by the way, Isaac, one of our sons wants to kill the other one. 00:09:06.379 --> 00:09:07.759 Okay, she keeps that to herself. 00:09:07.759 --> 00:09:11.139 She actually says, hey, she comes up with this reason 00:09:11.139 --> 00:09:13.740 she thinks it's going to appeal to her husband. 00:09:14.019 --> 00:09:15.480 Instead of making it about their sons, 00:09:15.840 --> 00:09:18.799 she makes it about marrying the wrong people. 00:09:19.259 --> 00:09:20.399 This is verse 46. 00:09:20.919 --> 00:09:22.299 Then Rebecca said to Isaac, 00:09:22.659 --> 00:09:26.460 I loathe my life because of the Hittite women. 00:09:26.939 --> 00:09:29.879 If Jacob marries one of the Hittite women like these, 00:09:30.059 --> 00:09:31.899 one of the women of the land, 00:09:32.240 --> 00:09:35.720 what good will my life be to me? 00:09:36.299 --> 00:09:37.700 Now we already know this. 00:09:37.759 --> 00:09:39.799 The end of chapter 26, 00:09:40.279 --> 00:09:44.080 we found out that Esau had married two Hittite women, 00:09:44.399 --> 00:09:49.759 and there it said they made life bitter for Isaac and Rebecca. 00:09:50.019 --> 00:09:53.879 So this has been a problem for some time. 00:09:54.919 --> 00:09:57.200 The leadership expert, Michael Hyatt, 00:09:57.259 --> 00:09:59.259 says that there is a radio station, 00:09:59.259 --> 00:10:02.919 and that radio station is called WIIFM, 00:10:03.580 --> 00:10:05.480 what's in it for me? 00:10:06.580 --> 00:10:11.360 And that that is a radio station that everyone in the world is tuned into. 00:10:12.460 --> 00:10:13.799 Rebecca knows that. 00:10:13.899 --> 00:10:14.759 She's crafty. 00:10:15.299 --> 00:10:20.000 She knows that this is what's actually going to appeal to her husband. 00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:22.039 It's what's going to get Isaac's attention. 00:10:22.379 --> 00:10:25.519 Hey, you know all those problems we have with Esau's wives? 00:10:25.519 --> 00:10:27.939 If we don't do something, 00:10:28.039 --> 00:10:32.120 we're going to have the same problem with Jacob's wives. 00:10:32.840 --> 00:10:36.220 Isaac, as we saw last week, he's ruled by his appetites, 00:10:36.480 --> 00:10:39.419 which means he's ruled by comfort and pleasure. 00:10:39.840 --> 00:10:43.279 And so she has to present something that's an immediate threat to his comfort and pleasure. 00:10:43.279 --> 00:10:45.179 Hey, you know we're suffering now? 00:10:45.899 --> 00:10:49.339 Let's make sure we don't suffer more. 00:10:54.319 --> 00:10:56.240 I'm going to pull us out of the story for a second. 00:10:56.379 --> 00:10:57.100 So that's where we're at. 00:10:57.620 --> 00:11:01.799 And I'm going to explain to you why the Hittite women are so problematic. 00:11:02.480 --> 00:11:04.000 I'm going to apply it for us, 00:11:04.059 --> 00:11:05.839 and then we're going to jump back into the story. 00:11:06.179 --> 00:11:06.339 Okay? 00:11:07.500 --> 00:11:12.819 The problem with the Hittite women, first of all, is not their race. 00:11:13.600 --> 00:11:17.740 The problem with the Hittite women is their religion. 00:11:18.439 --> 00:11:20.579 Now, this gets confusing in the Old Testament 00:11:20.579 --> 00:11:25.939 because race and religion overlap in a way that's bigger than it does today. 00:11:26.120 --> 00:11:30.819 But we have other places in the Bible that help us understand that race is not the problem. 00:11:31.220 --> 00:11:32.659 I'm just going to tell you one of them. 00:11:32.959 --> 00:11:34.600 It's from the story of Ruth. 00:11:35.059 --> 00:11:36.899 Ruth is a Moabite. 00:11:37.019 --> 00:11:38.439 So she's not an Israelite. 00:11:38.539 --> 00:11:40.019 She's not from the people of God. 00:11:40.480 --> 00:11:42.939 But Ruth comes to Naomi and says, 00:11:42.940 --> 00:11:44.260 this is in Ruth chapter 1, 00:11:44.680 --> 00:11:46.940 your God is my God. 00:11:47.980 --> 00:11:49.780 So she's not the right race, 00:11:49.920 --> 00:11:51.840 which actually doesn't matter. 00:11:52.240 --> 00:11:53.700 She's the right religion, 00:11:53.700 --> 00:11:55.180 which does matter. 00:11:55.520 --> 00:11:56.540 And she marries Boaz. 00:11:56.840 --> 00:11:58.180 Another way of putting it is this. 00:11:58.680 --> 00:12:01.980 Boaz is better off marrying Ruth 00:12:01.980 --> 00:12:06.500 than many of the Israelite women at the time. 00:12:07.220 --> 00:12:08.240 So we have to clear that up. 00:12:08.320 --> 00:12:09.820 The problem is not that they're Hittites. 00:12:10.100 --> 00:12:12.879 The problem is that they are not people of the promise. 00:12:13.039 --> 00:12:14.700 They're not people of the covenant. 00:12:15.659 --> 00:12:20.919 That then takes us to some principles we have to lay out and understand about marriage. 00:12:20.919 --> 00:12:25.759 And that helps us understand why it is that if we're a Christian, 00:12:25.919 --> 00:12:27.059 we marry other Christians. 00:12:27.500 --> 00:12:28.839 The first one is this. 00:12:30.759 --> 00:12:38.799 There is nothing in your life that is more important than your relationship with God. 00:12:38.799 --> 00:12:50.299 Principle two, 00:12:50.299 --> 00:13:01.479 there is most likely no one who has more power and influence in your life than your spouse. 00:13:02.299 --> 00:13:14.559 There is most likely no one who is able to turn you in one direction or another than your husband or your wife. 00:13:14.559 --> 00:13:21.459 That is the person with the most influence and power. 00:13:22.219 --> 00:13:24.879 So if someone's able to turn you towards the Lord, 00:13:25.679 --> 00:13:26.859 it's going to be your spouse. 00:13:27.619 --> 00:13:31.139 If someone is able to turn you away from the Lord, 00:13:31.559 --> 00:13:33.739 it's going to be your spouse. 00:13:35.000 --> 00:13:39.759 And so you never want that person who has the most power in your life 00:13:39.759 --> 00:13:44.159 to be someone who would even move you an inch away from God. 00:13:45.460 --> 00:13:46.340 Third principle, 00:13:47.960 --> 00:13:54.279 it is harder to raise our children to love and know God 00:13:54.279 --> 00:13:57.379 when our spouse is not helping us. 00:13:58.600 --> 00:13:59.539 It is harder. 00:13:59.559 --> 00:14:02.279 And I say it's harder because I don't want you to hear it's impossible. 00:14:02.799 --> 00:14:05.899 I don't want you to hear me say that and for you to be discouraged. 00:14:05.899 --> 00:14:09.279 I am here to provide warnings from God's word, as I mentioned. 00:14:09.759 --> 00:14:13.259 But also to remind you of the great hope that comes in the gospel. 00:14:13.919 --> 00:14:17.159 And we have an example from the Bible itself that gives us great hope. 00:14:17.559 --> 00:14:21.559 You may be familiar with Timothy, who is a church planter in the New Testament. 00:14:22.080 --> 00:14:26.639 The letters of 1 and 2 Timothy were written by the Apostle Paul to Timothy. 00:14:27.519 --> 00:14:27.679 Okay? 00:14:28.460 --> 00:14:30.659 Timothy's dad was not a Christian. 00:14:31.879 --> 00:14:33.899 And Paul writing to him says, 00:14:33.899 --> 00:14:37.960 Hey, remember you learned the faith from your mother and your grandmother. 00:14:37.960 --> 00:14:40.800 So I don't want you to hear me say that. 00:14:40.840 --> 00:14:43.620 It is harder to raise our children in the Lord. 00:14:43.700 --> 00:14:45.540 It is certainly not impossible. 00:14:46.240 --> 00:14:47.400 So those are our principles. 00:14:47.820 --> 00:14:50.180 There's nothing more important than your relationship with God. 00:14:50.460 --> 00:14:53.080 There's no one more powerful than your spouse. 00:14:53.560 --> 00:14:57.940 And it is harder to raise your children in the Lord. 00:14:57.940 --> 00:15:05.900 Now, I'm going to tell you how this applies to both people who are single and people who are married. 00:15:06.560 --> 00:15:14.220 First of all, for single people, at risk of stating the obvious, we do not marry people who are not Christians. 00:15:14.220 --> 00:15:19.340 Now, this is a constant challenge and temptation in the church. 00:15:19.460 --> 00:15:22.899 And it's a challenge and a temptation for a number of reasons. 00:15:23.360 --> 00:15:26.240 First of all, it is culturally acceptable now. 00:15:26.320 --> 00:15:30.040 When you see someone who has an interfaith marriage, people celebrate about it. 00:15:30.160 --> 00:15:35.300 When Chelsea Clinton, who I think was Episcopalian, married Mark Mesvinsky, who was Jewish, 00:15:35.440 --> 00:15:38.899 people thought, man, this is just so progressive and modern and good. 00:15:38.899 --> 00:15:44.159 Someone once told me about an interfaith marriage, you know, they said it actually works. 00:15:45.079 --> 00:15:49.159 And I thought, well, yeah, I'm sure it actually works if neither of you really care about your faith. 00:15:50.059 --> 00:15:51.959 I'm sure it works in that situation. 00:15:52.500 --> 00:15:54.179 But it's culturally accepted, right? 00:15:54.199 --> 00:15:58.179 So we're going against the current when we say, actually, we only marry people in our faith. 00:15:59.079 --> 00:16:03.579 Second reason it's a challenge is that finding a spouse is really hard. 00:16:04.799 --> 00:16:07.439 You have to find someone you're actually attracted to. 00:16:07.440 --> 00:16:10.240 Then you have to be compatible with them. 00:16:10.480 --> 00:16:12.840 Then you have to have a similar vision for life. 00:16:12.920 --> 00:16:15.120 You're going to have to want the same things. 00:16:16.260 --> 00:16:19.180 And then on top of that, you're going to add the same faith. 00:16:19.800 --> 00:16:21.340 That just makes it even more complicated. 00:16:21.460 --> 00:16:25.220 That takes the pull that I had and it shrinks it even more. 00:16:26.620 --> 00:16:31.280 Why would I add that as a limiter when there's so many other limiters? 00:16:33.320 --> 00:16:36.080 Third, and this one is especially insidious. 00:16:36.080 --> 00:16:44.879 It is tempting to believe that some marriage is better than no marriage. 00:16:45.680 --> 00:16:50.639 It's tempting to believe that some marriage is better than no marriage. 00:16:50.720 --> 00:16:54.920 And so what they say is, hey, at least I'm not alone anymore. 00:16:55.040 --> 00:16:55.879 At least I'm not single. 00:16:56.200 --> 00:16:57.600 I won't be lonely. 00:16:57.600 --> 00:17:00.960 The problem is this. 00:17:02.879 --> 00:17:07.759 There is more than one type of loneliness. 00:17:09.920 --> 00:17:11.860 There's more than one type of loneliness. 00:17:11.859 --> 00:17:18.439 Yes, it is lonely to be literally alone, that there's physically not someone with you. 00:17:19.319 --> 00:17:24.359 There's also something that can actually be worse, which is emotional loneliness. 00:17:25.139 --> 00:17:33.919 It is incredibly lonely to be with someone who does not share your deepest values and convictions. 00:17:33.920 --> 00:17:41.600 It's incredibly lonely to be with someone who uses a totally different compass than you do in life. 00:17:41.599 --> 00:17:48.919 It's lonely to be with someone who has a different north star. 00:17:51.399 --> 00:17:56.759 Marriage will not necessarily make you feel less alone. 00:17:58.139 --> 00:18:01.179 In certain circumstances, it might make you feel more alone. 00:18:01.180 --> 00:18:03.400 So it's a myth. 00:18:03.480 --> 00:18:09.140 It is not true that it's better to have some marriage than no marriage. 00:18:11.200 --> 00:18:12.340 Fourth reason is this. 00:18:13.160 --> 00:18:20.299 It is tempting because often non-Christians are more exciting than Christians. 00:18:22.880 --> 00:18:26.180 I'm not going to go into all of the reasons for that, but you'll hear people say things like this. 00:18:26.180 --> 00:18:29.460 The Christian guys that I know are really boring. 00:18:29.460 --> 00:18:32.279 The Christian girls that I know are really boring. 00:18:32.840 --> 00:18:37.880 I had a friend in seminary who was frustrated with all these seminarians not knowing how to date, 00:18:37.980 --> 00:18:41.420 and so he told me, I'm going to run a seminar for you all on game. 00:18:42.440 --> 00:18:46.600 I'm going to teach everyone how to have game, which is a way of saying, 00:18:46.660 --> 00:18:47.960 I'm going to teach you how to be less boring. 00:18:48.059 --> 00:18:49.019 I'm going to teach you how to date. 00:18:49.940 --> 00:18:55.720 The problem with that is this, that the excitement that you sense with that person is going to wear off. 00:18:55.720 --> 00:19:01.059 It's going to wear off because excitement naturally wears off as you age, 00:19:01.299 --> 00:19:07.319 and it's also going to wear off as you realize, hey, we actually care about really different things. 00:19:08.779 --> 00:19:12.420 Chemistry is only going to take us so far. 00:19:12.420 --> 00:19:17.080 Fifth and final reason it's tempting is this. 00:19:18.660 --> 00:19:26.080 Often, sometimes, non-Christians treat you better than Christians. 00:19:27.360 --> 00:19:29.500 And so you'll hear people say things like this. 00:19:29.500 --> 00:19:35.720 I know he's not a believer, but he treats me better than any Christian guy ever has. 00:19:36.880 --> 00:19:43.519 Hey, I know she doesn't share my faith, but she's kinder to me than any Christian woman has been. 00:19:44.779 --> 00:19:46.299 Now, you might find that shocking. 00:19:46.700 --> 00:19:48.339 We've talked about this before, though. 00:19:48.759 --> 00:19:51.079 Remember chapter 20 of the book of Genesis? 00:19:51.079 --> 00:19:56.859 We have this comparison between Abimelech, who's a pagan, and Abraham, who loves God. 00:19:56.939 --> 00:20:00.699 And in that instance, Abimelech is actually more righteous. 00:20:01.939 --> 00:20:06.559 So there are times you'll meet a non-Christian, and they're going to treat you better than a Christian does. 00:20:07.319 --> 00:20:07.919 Go back. 00:20:08.039 --> 00:20:09.699 We could review chapter 20. 00:20:09.799 --> 00:20:11.399 There's a lot of reasons we talked about for that. 00:20:11.779 --> 00:20:14.279 Ultimately, it's about the fact that we're made in the image of God, 00:20:14.279 --> 00:20:19.039 that God's characteristics still shine through in people who have rejected him. 00:20:21.079 --> 00:20:22.779 The point of all of it is this. 00:20:24.659 --> 00:20:32.019 If someone does not share your faith, then they have no interest in your relationship with the Lord. 00:20:33.439 --> 00:20:36.199 At best, they will ignore it. 00:20:36.899 --> 00:20:42.480 At worst, they will discourage it or be hostile to it. 00:20:43.539 --> 00:20:49.299 If we're single, do not marry non-Christians. 00:20:49.299 --> 00:20:53.039 By the way, I want to mention that we don't missionary date. 00:20:53.680 --> 00:20:57.339 You might say, okay, I'm not going to marry a non-Christian, but I'm going to date them, 00:20:57.399 --> 00:21:00.899 because as they get to know me, of course, they're going to get to know the Lord, right? 00:21:01.000 --> 00:21:02.440 And I'm going to convert them. 00:21:03.419 --> 00:21:06.619 At the very best, you're in sort of this bait-and-switch situation. 00:21:07.839 --> 00:21:10.919 At the very worst, you end up marrying a non-Christian. 00:21:10.920 --> 00:21:16.640 Because the heart wants what it wants. 00:21:21.300 --> 00:21:31.140 Kids, at some point, you will likely meet someone who is wonderful and beautiful, 00:21:31.560 --> 00:21:36.460 who shares your interests and with whom you have intense chemistry. 00:21:36.460 --> 00:21:40.860 But they do not share your faith. 00:21:43.680 --> 00:21:48.100 It might be exciting for a time, for a short time. 00:21:50.880 --> 00:21:53.940 And it will also be lonely for a long time. 00:21:56.120 --> 00:21:57.900 Do not do it. 00:21:57.900 --> 00:22:05.519 I told you I was going to speak to single people. 00:22:06.259 --> 00:22:08.220 I'm also going to tell you how this matters to married people. 00:22:08.320 --> 00:22:10.800 You might be thinking, okay, I'm married to a Christian. 00:22:10.920 --> 00:22:11.440 I'm a Christian. 00:22:11.580 --> 00:22:14.700 I'm not sure how this applies to me, but I'm glad the single people are hearing it. 00:22:16.900 --> 00:22:21.100 If you are married to a Christian, this principle still applies to you. 00:22:21.099 --> 00:22:30.959 There is no one in your life who has more power and influence to turn you towards the Lord. 00:22:32.819 --> 00:22:42.659 You have more power in your spouse's life than anyone else to encourage them, 00:22:43.740 --> 00:22:49.139 empower them, and enable them to chase after God. 00:22:49.140 --> 00:22:53.960 Use your power for good. 00:22:56.920 --> 00:22:57.940 Urge each other. 00:22:59.300 --> 00:23:04.060 Urge each other in a kind and loving and gentle way that we're going to be in church together. 00:23:04.180 --> 00:23:05.400 We're going to be in prayer together. 00:23:05.500 --> 00:23:07.180 We're going to read the word together. 00:23:08.600 --> 00:23:13.860 No one can catalyze your faith more than your spouse. 00:23:15.220 --> 00:23:16.080 So do it. 00:23:16.079 --> 00:23:19.299 Do it for each other. 00:23:21.500 --> 00:23:24.819 Now maybe you're married, and you are married to a non-Christian. 00:23:25.519 --> 00:23:30.960 As I mentioned earlier, our goal here is not for you to feel defeated or discouraged or shamed or called out, 00:23:30.960 --> 00:23:34.539 because the power of the gospel is still at work. 00:23:35.399 --> 00:23:38.259 And the Bible speaks to this situation as well. 00:23:38.259 --> 00:23:44.039 1 Peter 3 talks to wives who are married to husbands who are not Christians, and it says, 00:23:44.559 --> 00:23:45.920 win them without a word. 00:23:47.079 --> 00:23:51.660 In other words, if your spouse is the most powerful person in your life, guess what? 00:23:52.519 --> 00:23:57.099 No one has more power to draw your spouse to the Lord than you. 00:23:58.039 --> 00:23:58.819 Take heart. 00:23:58.819 --> 00:24:16.379 There's great hope. 00:24:16.379 --> 00:24:21.500 You may very well be God's instrument in their lives. 00:24:21.500 --> 00:24:36.240 So there's a powerful principle, which is of the power of a spouse to bring close or draw away from the Lord that applies to anyone and everyone. 00:24:36.240 --> 00:24:43.460 I told you we were going to jump out of the story. 00:24:44.120 --> 00:24:45.319 Now we're going to jump back in. 00:24:46.000 --> 00:24:47.160 We're in chapter 28. 00:24:48.039 --> 00:24:51.140 Isaac goes to Jacob, this is verse 1, and tells him, 00:24:51.500 --> 00:24:52.680 no Canaanite women. 00:24:53.319 --> 00:24:58.960 You need to go to Laban, your mother's uncle, your uncle, your mother's brother, get a wife there. 00:24:58.960 --> 00:25:03.440 Then verses 3 and 4, he gives him the blessing that he should have given him before. 00:25:03.860 --> 00:25:08.200 So this Abrahamic blessing, remember we've talked about the chain of custody, gets passed on. 00:25:08.840 --> 00:25:14.160 Verse 5, Jacob does what he's told, which sets us up for the next part of the story. 00:25:15.039 --> 00:25:20.319 Because we're going to spend a number of chapters with our friend Laban. 00:25:21.940 --> 00:25:26.319 Esau, on the other hand, completely messes it up. 00:25:26.380 --> 00:25:27.279 He fumbles things. 00:25:27.279 --> 00:25:30.559 So verses 6 and 7, he sees what happens. 00:25:30.680 --> 00:25:34.779 He sees his father telling his brother, hey, make sure you marry in the family. 00:25:36.319 --> 00:25:38.819 Sees that that results in a blessing. 00:25:38.980 --> 00:25:39.559 He's like, oh, look. 00:25:39.839 --> 00:25:42.359 Okay, so if you marry someone in the family, the father's happy. 00:25:42.500 --> 00:25:43.559 He blesses you. 00:25:44.420 --> 00:25:46.519 Verse 8, this is pleasing to dad. 00:25:46.759 --> 00:25:49.420 By the way, it's interesting, there's no mention of mom in verse 8. 00:25:50.700 --> 00:25:53.420 Esau's his father's favorite son, not his mother's. 00:25:53.420 --> 00:25:57.980 And so he thinks, okay, I want the blessing. 00:25:58.700 --> 00:25:59.860 I want to honor my father. 00:25:59.980 --> 00:26:01.440 I want to do what my parents want. 00:26:01.980 --> 00:26:03.340 I'm going to go marry a relative. 00:26:03.339 --> 00:26:10.819 So he goes and he marries Ishmael's daughter. 00:26:16.819 --> 00:26:20.099 Ishmael is not included in the covenant. 00:26:20.099 --> 00:26:24.199 Remember I told you this is not about race. 00:26:24.259 --> 00:26:25.539 It's about religion. 00:26:26.159 --> 00:26:27.259 Esau gets that flipped. 00:26:28.539 --> 00:26:30.359 Esau doesn't realize this is about religion. 00:26:30.500 --> 00:26:31.639 He thinks it's about race. 00:26:32.639 --> 00:26:39.799 He doesn't realize that the marriage he's supposed to make is one of commitment to God and his covenant. 00:26:39.939 --> 00:26:42.799 The covenant does not flow through Ishmael. 00:26:42.799 --> 00:26:46.039 God made this clear in Genesis chapter 17. 00:26:46.599 --> 00:26:51.139 Remember Abraham's bargaining with him and Abraham says, hey, why can't you just bless Ishmael? 00:26:51.480 --> 00:26:53.259 This is when he has not had a son yet. 00:26:53.419 --> 00:26:54.299 Isaac hasn't been born. 00:26:55.019 --> 00:26:56.779 And God says, hey, look, I hear you. 00:26:57.180 --> 00:26:59.419 I'm going to bless Ishmael and multiply him. 00:27:00.059 --> 00:27:03.879 But I will establish my covenant with Isaac. 00:27:08.220 --> 00:27:12.740 Esau has never understood what is most valuable. 00:27:13.759 --> 00:27:19.980 He didn't understand it in chapter 25 when he sold his birthright for a pot of stew. 00:27:21.200 --> 00:27:27.879 He doesn't understand it now when he goes for Ishmael and marries outside of the covenant. 00:27:29.119 --> 00:27:30.480 Esau is his own worst enemy. 00:27:31.720 --> 00:27:35.119 Spiritually numb, uninterested in the things of God. 00:27:35.200 --> 00:27:38.180 He completely misses the point. 00:27:38.180 --> 00:27:46.720 He does not understand that his relationship with God is more important than anything else. 00:27:46.720 --> 00:27:46.819 Jesus. 00:27:48.680 --> 00:27:52.339 Which, by the way, is the opposite of what Jesus teaches. 00:27:53.360 --> 00:27:59.279 Matthew chapter 13, Jesus gives us two stories about how much the gospel is worth. 00:27:59.680 --> 00:28:01.900 Stories about the kingdom of heaven. 00:28:01.900 --> 00:28:06.280 First of all, he says the kingdom of heaven is like a treasure hidden in a field. 00:28:07.280 --> 00:28:14.280 And when a man finds out about it, he sells everything to buy the field. 00:28:14.279 --> 00:28:22.180 It's worth losing every single thing he owns if he can have that. 00:28:23.740 --> 00:28:28.639 Then Jesus says the kingdom of heaven is like a pearl of great value. 00:28:28.640 --> 00:28:41.220 And there's a pearl merchant who finds the pearl and he sells every other pearl he owns to have that one pearl. 00:28:41.220 --> 00:28:57.319 Brothers and sisters, the gospel is of such great value that it is worth giving up everything else. 00:28:57.319 --> 00:29:12.519 The gospel is so precious that we cannot, we must not risk it on a mere relationship. 00:29:14.899 --> 00:29:18.059 Why is the gospel so valuable? 00:29:20.079 --> 00:29:21.819 There's many reasons. 00:29:22.359 --> 00:29:24.679 I'll remind you of a few. 00:29:24.680 --> 00:29:28.720 First, as we've discussed many times, 00:29:29.840 --> 00:29:35.600 worshiping God is the only way to enjoy anything else. 00:29:37.000 --> 00:29:38.880 Remember David Gibson says, 00:29:39.039 --> 00:29:44.480 in the created world, you can only truly enjoy what you do not worship. 00:29:46.060 --> 00:29:49.000 If you put that romantic relationship first, 00:29:49.539 --> 00:29:51.380 you won't enjoy it. 00:29:52.220 --> 00:29:53.820 It will rule over you. 00:29:53.819 --> 00:29:57.000 It will be a thorn in your side. 00:29:58.899 --> 00:30:02.339 The gospel is worth more than anything else 00:30:02.339 --> 00:30:09.639 because our relationship with God actually gives us the full and true intimacy 00:30:09.639 --> 00:30:13.519 that marriage can only point to. 00:30:13.519 --> 00:30:19.039 And the gospel is worth more than anything else. 00:30:19.039 --> 00:30:24.859 Because our eternal future with God in heaven 00:30:24.859 --> 00:30:33.299 hangs on the forgiveness that comes from following God in faith. 00:30:33.299 --> 00:30:41.819 There is nothing that compares in value to the gospel of Jesus Christ. 00:30:41.819 --> 00:30:52.259 Our relationship with God is our only path to life. 00:30:52.259 --> 00:31:00.019 And it is the only hope for those inside the church and those outside the church. 00:31:00.019 --> 00:31:02.639 And so we must not. 00:31:03.319 --> 00:31:11.599 We cannot do anything that threatens that because the gospel is our greatest treasure. 00:31:11.599 --> 00:31:14.339 Father, let's pray. 00:31:16.119 --> 00:31:24.199 Our Father in heaven, we do thank you and praise you that you offer us more than any spouse can give. 00:31:24.200 --> 00:31:29.940 That you can out-give and out-bless any relationship. 00:31:30.480 --> 00:31:34.279 We ask that you would protect us from our own foolishness. 00:31:35.220 --> 00:31:37.360 That you would set our hearts on you. 00:31:37.480 --> 00:31:41.819 That you would remind us that your gospel is worth more than anything else. 00:31:41.900 --> 00:31:45.680 And that it would be the north star of our lives. 00:31:45.720 --> 00:31:47.700 That we would set our eyes on it. 00:31:47.700 --> 00:31:50.039 That we would let nothing get in the way. 00:31:50.319 --> 00:31:52.400 And we ask all of these things in Jesus' name. 00:31:52.779 --> 00:31:53.019 Amen.