WEBVTT 00:00:00.800 --> 00:00:07.259 Well, we've reached a spot in the book of Ephesians where the Apostle Paul is turning his attention to marriage. 00:00:07.459 --> 00:00:10.939 And so we're going to be turning our attention to marriage for the next couple Sundays here. 00:00:12.640 --> 00:00:18.580 But before we go there, I just want to give you a big picture of marriage. 00:00:19.179 --> 00:00:26.240 When we talk about salvation, we're talking about a big sweep of time. 00:00:26.239 --> 00:00:32.659 So you can summarize kind of the history of salvation with just three words. 00:00:33.539 --> 00:00:36.259 Creation, fall, and redemption. 00:00:36.780 --> 00:00:42.159 And those three words provide a very helpful way to think about certain things. 00:00:42.560 --> 00:00:44.659 One of which is marriage. 00:00:45.679 --> 00:00:53.399 And so what I'd like to do for you is just give you a crash course on marriage in light of creation, fall, and redemption. 00:00:53.399 --> 00:00:59.140 And that will set us up for what Paul says in Ephesians chapter 5. 00:00:59.600 --> 00:00:59.920 You ready? 00:01:02.700 --> 00:01:04.920 Marriage in the light of creation. 00:01:05.539 --> 00:01:14.579 In Genesis 1 and 2, God created man and woman, Adam and Eve, and he created each of them in his own image. 00:01:14.980 --> 00:01:18.539 And he's very, very specific about that. 00:01:18.540 --> 00:01:26.600 We read Genesis 1 and we walk away saying both Adam and Eve were made in the image of God. 00:01:27.120 --> 00:01:31.880 So a man is not more valuable in God's eyes because he's a man. 00:01:32.520 --> 00:01:36.219 And a woman is not less valuable in God's eyes because she's a woman. 00:01:37.060 --> 00:01:44.000 What this means is when God looks at a man and a woman, he sees two image bearers of same worth. 00:01:44.440 --> 00:01:47.840 They both are image bearers of God. 00:01:47.840 --> 00:01:55.900 And so God is clear on that in Genesis chapter 1, 26 and 27 where he says both man and woman were made in his image. 00:01:56.900 --> 00:02:06.100 But what we also learn from Genesis chapter 2 is that God gave distinct roles to Adam because he was a man. 00:02:06.460 --> 00:02:11.840 And he gave a distinct role to Eve because she was a woman in this thing called marriage. 00:02:12.819 --> 00:02:15.480 Adam was given charge of the garden. 00:02:15.479 --> 00:02:18.099 Adam, he named all the animals. 00:02:18.699 --> 00:02:22.159 Eve came out of him and he eventually named Eve. 00:02:22.539 --> 00:02:30.519 And so what the Bible describes there, how it summarizes up Adam's role is the word headship. 00:02:31.319 --> 00:02:33.759 We see that in 1 Corinthians 11 verse 3. 00:02:34.239 --> 00:02:37.879 And we'll see that played out a little later on in Ephesians chapter 5. 00:02:37.879 --> 00:02:46.379 What he did with Eve was he created Eve out of Adam for her to be Adam's helpmate. 00:02:46.879 --> 00:02:48.039 To help him. 00:02:48.439 --> 00:02:50.379 To help him tend the garden. 00:02:50.879 --> 00:02:52.419 To help him fulfill his role. 00:02:53.039 --> 00:02:58.859 And so what I want to help you to see though is both of them have the same value in God's eyes. 00:02:58.860 --> 00:03:01.980 But each of them were given distinct roles. 00:03:02.480 --> 00:03:09.800 And the reason why God gave them distinct roles to be played out together was for them to experience harmony in marriage. 00:03:10.660 --> 00:03:12.540 And so God's goal was unity. 00:03:13.360 --> 00:03:22.800 And not by kind of being able to swap out the roles, but by giving specific roles that complement each other. 00:03:22.800 --> 00:03:25.200 And what I also want to see is this. 00:03:25.960 --> 00:03:28.840 God assigned these roles before the fall. 00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:34.219 And so the fall didn't result in roles. 00:03:34.980 --> 00:03:39.060 The fall actually distorted the roles. 00:03:39.960 --> 00:03:42.180 So we talked about creation of Adam and Eve. 00:03:43.040 --> 00:03:45.760 Equal in value, different in roles. 00:03:46.020 --> 00:03:48.360 And now we turn to talking about the fall. 00:03:48.360 --> 00:03:52.360 And what we see in the fall is the distortion of the roles. 00:03:52.800 --> 00:03:55.420 So they both are image bearers of God. 00:03:55.600 --> 00:03:58.219 But with the fall comes consequences. 00:03:58.939 --> 00:04:01.920 And so in Genesis chapter 3, God walks into the garden. 00:04:02.240 --> 00:04:03.920 And he says, hey Adam, what happened? 00:04:04.540 --> 00:04:05.560 And you know the story. 00:04:05.680 --> 00:04:07.380 Adam punts to Eve. 00:04:07.460 --> 00:04:08.840 And Eve punts to the serpent. 00:04:09.800 --> 00:04:14.160 But in Genesis chapter 3 verse 16, God specifically says to Eve, 00:04:14.240 --> 00:04:16.019 there's some consequences here. 00:04:17.019 --> 00:04:20.900 You will desire your husband. 00:04:20.899 --> 00:04:26.839 You will long to be in power over him. 00:04:27.039 --> 00:04:30.779 That's the Hebrew meaning of that particular word. 00:04:32.500 --> 00:04:35.000 Your desire shall be for your husband. 00:04:35.519 --> 00:04:39.879 And then he says to Eve, and he, Adam, shall rule over you. 00:04:39.959 --> 00:04:44.120 And that word rule is talking about a kind of leadership. 00:04:44.120 --> 00:04:46.500 It's not a loving leadership. 00:04:47.240 --> 00:04:48.780 It's a harsh leadership. 00:04:49.540 --> 00:04:51.420 A tyrannical kind of leadership. 00:04:51.920 --> 00:04:57.120 And so what you see as the consequence, the fallout of the fall in Genesis 3 verse 16 is 00:04:57.120 --> 00:04:59.980 the distortion of the roles. 00:04:59.980 --> 00:05:06.040 But praise be to God, it doesn't end there. 00:05:07.660 --> 00:05:09.660 Because God all along had a plan. 00:05:10.700 --> 00:05:15.080 And we see that plan spoken of in Ephesians chapter 1 verse 9 and 10. 00:05:15.840 --> 00:05:22.420 That God's plan for all time was to unite all things in Christ. 00:05:22.420 --> 00:05:35.180 And so what Christ is seeking to do in us is to redeem our marriages. 00:05:35.720 --> 00:05:44.200 And to redeem the roles by restoring the roles as God had originally designed them. 00:05:44.199 --> 00:05:57.439 So what happens for us in Christ is God reverses, is seeking to reverse the distortion of sin on our roles as husbands and wives. 00:05:58.099 --> 00:06:02.279 And what sin does is it distorts things by making it about me. 00:06:02.419 --> 00:06:03.319 You know what I'm talking about? 00:06:03.399 --> 00:06:04.199 This is about me. 00:06:05.019 --> 00:06:07.219 And so marriage isn't about me. 00:06:08.360 --> 00:06:12.740 What God does in Christ is make marriage about Christ. 00:06:14.199 --> 00:06:15.099 It's about Him. 00:06:16.099 --> 00:06:19.979 And we're going to see that played out all throughout Ephesians chapter 5 and 6. 00:06:21.599 --> 00:06:26.180 In Christ, God is seeking to re-image Himself in us. 00:06:26.599 --> 00:06:27.459 Christ-likeness. 00:06:27.939 --> 00:06:36.500 And He's seeking to retool our roles to function the way that He originally designed them to function. 00:06:39.259 --> 00:06:44.180 So in Christ, God is seeking to restore His God-given roles. 00:06:44.199 --> 00:06:58.860 So the reason why Ephesians 5, 22-33 is in your Bible is to help you experience the unity that God intends for you out of obedience to Jesus. 00:06:59.259 --> 00:07:00.759 Unity in your marriage. 00:07:01.599 --> 00:07:02.860 Fulfilling of your roles. 00:07:02.860 --> 00:07:13.300 God is calling us to live out our designated roles out of obedience to Christ for the glory of His name. 00:07:13.720 --> 00:07:14.600 Because here's the deal. 00:07:15.759 --> 00:07:20.540 When we live according to God's plan in our marriages, you know what happens? 00:07:21.819 --> 00:07:24.699 Our marriages end up spotlighting Jesus. 00:07:24.699 --> 00:07:33.719 Our marriages become a little living parable between Christ's relationship to the church. 00:07:34.139 --> 00:07:36.519 It has a redemptive impact. 00:07:36.519 --> 00:07:43.819 So, this morning, wives, what I want you to see is this. 00:07:45.019 --> 00:07:55.259 Your relationship to Christ informs and directs your relationship to your husband. 00:07:56.060 --> 00:08:03.279 Your relationship to Christ informs and directs your relationship to your husband. 00:08:03.279 --> 00:08:08.079 And so, I'm going to show you by making five points this morning. 00:08:09.039 --> 00:08:14.079 But let me read Ephesians 5, 22-24. 00:08:16.799 --> 00:08:18.039 We read this. 00:08:18.739 --> 00:08:23.639 Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. 00:08:23.639 --> 00:08:31.919 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 00:08:33.179 --> 00:08:40.460 Now, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. 00:08:42.659 --> 00:08:48.960 Wives, your relationship to Christ informs and directs your relationship to your husband. 00:08:48.960 --> 00:08:55.519 Just to let you know, next week, we're going to get into the nitty-gritty of what God says to husbands. 00:08:57.420 --> 00:09:05.379 But let me give you these five points in order to bring this out, to help us see what God is saying right here. 00:09:05.980 --> 00:09:08.160 The first thing that I want you to see is this. 00:09:08.159 --> 00:09:16.539 It's the relationship between this text, verses 22-24, and what we just read before it. 00:09:17.459 --> 00:09:22.959 And so, Paul has been telling these Christians in Ephesus, starting in Ephesians 4-1, 00:09:23.379 --> 00:09:26.399 walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you've been called. 00:09:27.279 --> 00:09:29.879 And then in chapter 5, he says, walk in love. 00:09:30.360 --> 00:09:32.199 And then he says, walk as children of light. 00:09:32.579 --> 00:09:34.299 And then he says, walk in wisdom. 00:09:34.480 --> 00:09:35.319 Don't be a fool. 00:09:35.959 --> 00:09:36.879 Make the most of the time. 00:09:36.879 --> 00:09:37.700 Know God's will. 00:09:38.399 --> 00:09:40.379 Walk by the power of the Spirit. 00:09:40.759 --> 00:09:43.320 And then he says, when he's talking about the power of the Spirit, 00:09:43.720 --> 00:09:52.340 one of the ways that the Spirit's filling shows up is when Christians submit to one another out of fear of Christ. 00:09:52.419 --> 00:09:53.519 Do you see that in verse 21? 00:09:55.240 --> 00:09:57.039 And so here's what Paul is doing in 22. 00:09:58.080 --> 00:10:02.720 He's taking this idea of submission, and he's making a transition. 00:10:03.159 --> 00:10:03.860 He's pivoting. 00:10:03.860 --> 00:10:09.960 He's moving from submission in the context of a local church, submit to one another, 00:10:10.300 --> 00:10:17.940 and he's calling for submission, what that looks like, concrete examples in marriage. 00:10:17.940 --> 00:10:20.600 That's 522 through 33. 00:10:21.280 --> 00:10:25.320 And then he points to parenting in 6.1 through 6.4. 00:10:25.880 --> 00:10:30.140 And then he points to the workplace in 6.5 through 6.9. 00:10:30.700 --> 00:10:38.720 And so what he's doing is helping Christians understand what submission looks like in very concrete relationships. 00:10:38.720 --> 00:10:46.920 Now the thing that you need to know about each of these relationships is there's very clear lines of God-given authority in these relationships. 00:10:47.700 --> 00:10:58.080 And so what Paul is going to help us to see is how submission functions in these God-given lines of authority in these particular relationships. 00:10:58.080 --> 00:11:07.720 And so that's why he turns to marriage, and specifically to wives in chapter 5, verse 22. 00:11:09.720 --> 00:11:11.620 The second thing I want to point out. 00:11:14.860 --> 00:11:15.400 Headship. 00:11:15.399 --> 00:11:15.439 Headship. 00:11:17.139 --> 00:11:20.279 When I say headship, does that make you cringe? 00:11:23.480 --> 00:11:25.340 How do we think about headship? 00:11:27.000 --> 00:11:28.399 How should we think about that? 00:11:29.659 --> 00:11:31.539 How should we think about authority? 00:11:34.340 --> 00:11:42.799 My guess is that most of us think about headship or authority in terms of power and control. 00:11:42.799 --> 00:11:50.639 If you were to ask me, hey, give me a cultural example of authority, of submission, do you know where my mind goes to? 00:11:51.919 --> 00:11:53.959 Mixed martial arts battles. 00:11:55.799 --> 00:11:56.279 Seriously. 00:11:57.079 --> 00:12:01.599 People having to tap out in submission because they can't bear it anymore. 00:12:01.599 --> 00:12:09.679 I think many of us come to this word kind of authority and submission with this thought of power play. 00:12:11.159 --> 00:12:11.679 Dominance. 00:12:12.799 --> 00:12:20.699 And what I want to help you to see is that's not the primary intent here of headship or submission. 00:12:22.620 --> 00:12:23.659 I don't know about you. 00:12:23.740 --> 00:12:30.479 When I hear about headship and authority and think about in terms of power, I get suspicious. 00:12:31.839 --> 00:12:32.899 I get guarded. 00:12:33.479 --> 00:12:34.519 A little defensive. 00:12:34.519 --> 00:12:41.019 Because I tend to think that whoever's the head of something has the right to make people do what they want them to do. 00:12:42.939 --> 00:12:46.919 Whoever's the head, whoever's in charge gets to do whatever they'd like to do. 00:12:46.919 --> 00:12:55.919 So when we think about headship in terms of authority and power, we can easily start moving and thinking in terms of abuse. 00:12:55.919 --> 00:12:59.919 Authority exercised sinfully. 00:12:59.919 --> 00:13:06.199 And what I want to help you to think through is a better way of thinking about headship. 00:13:06.200 --> 00:13:10.320 Here it is. 00:13:10.320 --> 00:13:17.560 We must think about headship in authority primarily as responsibility. 00:13:17.559 --> 00:13:21.500 Would you look at Ephesians 5.23? 00:13:23.500 --> 00:13:27.259 For the husband is the head of the wife. 00:13:27.259 --> 00:13:34.659 Even as Christ is head of the church, his body. 00:13:35.799 --> 00:13:42.360 What I want both husbands and wives, men and women, to be thinking about primarily when you hear this word headship, 00:13:42.720 --> 00:13:46.879 I want you thinking in terms of responsibility. 00:13:47.879 --> 00:13:50.019 Headship is responsibility. 00:13:51.200 --> 00:13:55.259 John Stott in his commentary on Ephesians says it this way. 00:13:55.259 --> 00:14:05.100 In a word, the biblical concept of authority spells not tyranny, but responsibility. 00:14:06.539 --> 00:14:08.159 What kind of responsibility? 00:14:11.539 --> 00:14:14.039 Headship is a delegated responsibility. 00:14:16.259 --> 00:14:19.240 God giving responsibility to a husband. 00:14:20.879 --> 00:14:22.840 And so when we see that word headship, 00:14:22.840 --> 00:14:28.519 what we need to realize is behind that giving of responsibility is God himself. 00:14:29.800 --> 00:14:33.180 That is a responsibility entrusted to a husband 00:14:33.180 --> 00:14:36.940 because God chose it to give him that responsibility. 00:14:39.240 --> 00:14:43.420 By the way, that also means with that delegated responsibility, 00:14:43.840 --> 00:14:45.120 there is an accountability. 00:14:45.120 --> 00:14:47.820 Let me state it this way. 00:14:49.100 --> 00:14:54.519 I will have to give an account for my marriage to Jesus 00:14:54.519 --> 00:14:57.960 in a way my wife Jenny will not have to. 00:14:59.120 --> 00:15:02.960 God's going to hold me responsible for something of our marriage 00:15:02.960 --> 00:15:05.259 that he won't hold my wife responsible for. 00:15:05.259 --> 00:15:13.139 This headship responsibility is a representative responsibility. 00:15:15.019 --> 00:15:17.259 I have a responsibility for my wife. 00:15:19.179 --> 00:15:22.200 Do you remember in Genesis 3 what happens? 00:15:23.139 --> 00:15:27.779 In Genesis we read about how it was Eve who was tempted, 00:15:28.039 --> 00:15:30.299 took the fruit, ate the fruit, and gave it to her husband. 00:15:30.399 --> 00:15:30.840 Do you remember that? 00:15:31.799 --> 00:15:34.740 Remember in Genesis 3 who God comes to seek out? 00:15:35.259 --> 00:15:36.740 Do you recall? 00:15:38.319 --> 00:15:39.539 He seeks out Adam. 00:15:41.399 --> 00:15:44.480 It is a representative responsibility. 00:15:44.899 --> 00:15:46.539 It is a picture of headship. 00:15:50.720 --> 00:15:52.460 Brothers, it's pretty sobering, isn't it? 00:15:56.080 --> 00:15:58.080 It's a purposed responsibility. 00:15:59.259 --> 00:16:01.519 This is probably one of my burdens this morning. 00:16:01.519 --> 00:16:06.279 It's the aim of this responsibility. 00:16:07.480 --> 00:16:11.379 God has entrusted this to husbands for a purpose. 00:16:12.659 --> 00:16:16.519 The responsibility that we've been entrusted for, given, 00:16:16.860 --> 00:16:19.079 is the welfare of our wives. 00:16:20.139 --> 00:16:21.579 The good of our wives. 00:16:22.100 --> 00:16:23.000 The good of our children. 00:16:23.000 --> 00:16:25.000 Which means this. 00:16:25.000 --> 00:16:35.460 Brothers, we are not to exercise this God-given responsibility for our own sake, 00:16:36.019 --> 00:16:43.220 but for the sake of our own wives and our own children. 00:16:43.220 --> 00:16:46.620 That's the original intent. 00:16:49.120 --> 00:16:50.519 Sin distorted it, though. 00:16:52.440 --> 00:16:58.139 We've all experienced the sinful exercise of this kind of responsibility. 00:16:58.139 --> 00:17:01.779 But Christ is redeeming it. 00:17:03.039 --> 00:17:04.420 And we're given an example. 00:17:05.039 --> 00:17:07.200 So, I'm going to come back to this next week, 00:17:07.379 --> 00:17:10.759 but we just look at Ephesians 4.25. 00:17:13.480 --> 00:17:14.740 Excuse me, 5.25. 00:17:14.740 --> 00:17:26.720 Husbands, love your wives as Christ, the head of the church, loved the church, 00:17:27.380 --> 00:17:29.359 and gave himself up for her. 00:17:30.900 --> 00:17:32.599 Jesus is the ultimate head. 00:17:34.339 --> 00:17:38.779 He exercised the ultimate responsibility, the welfare of our souls, 00:17:39.000 --> 00:17:40.980 and he made the ultimate sacrifice. 00:17:40.980 --> 00:17:46.900 And what we see in Ephesians 5.25 is the exercise of responsibility. 00:17:48.960 --> 00:17:51.900 So, before we talk about submission, 00:17:52.500 --> 00:17:56.940 what I wanted to make sure we're clear on is this sense idea of headship. 00:17:58.440 --> 00:18:03.559 Headship is a God-given responsibility to husbands for the welfare, 00:18:03.860 --> 00:18:06.019 for the good of their wives, 00:18:06.339 --> 00:18:09.039 not the exploitation of their wives. 00:18:09.039 --> 00:18:12.059 not the abuse of their wives, 00:18:12.339 --> 00:18:15.799 for the good of their wives. 00:18:19.139 --> 00:18:23.659 And so, sisters, as we move now to this command to submit, 00:18:24.259 --> 00:18:26.399 I just want to help you to see something here. 00:18:26.980 --> 00:18:31.799 God isn't calling you to a degrading, mindless, 00:18:32.460 --> 00:18:34.859 tap-out kind of submission. 00:18:34.859 --> 00:18:40.859 God's calling you to a kind of a dance with your husband. 00:18:42.859 --> 00:18:45.139 His role is to lead for your good. 00:18:46.179 --> 00:18:49.259 And what we'll see here is your role is to let him lead you, 00:18:49.599 --> 00:18:51.539 even help him to lead you, 00:18:51.619 --> 00:18:57.259 because God intends for your husband to be a means of goodness to you. 00:18:57.259 --> 00:19:04.379 So, let's now, point three, turn to this command. 00:19:05.140 --> 00:19:06.279 The command to submit. 00:19:07.019 --> 00:19:09.859 Wives, submit to your own husbands. 00:19:11.859 --> 00:19:12.900 Remember, sisters, 00:19:13.759 --> 00:19:15.619 your relationship with Christ 00:19:15.619 --> 00:19:19.119 will inform and direct your relationship with your husband. 00:19:19.119 --> 00:19:22.119 And the other piece I just want to remind you of is, 00:19:22.239 --> 00:19:22.739 I know this. 00:19:23.159 --> 00:19:24.899 As soon as you hear the word submit, 00:19:25.439 --> 00:19:27.639 there's some things that can come into your mind. 00:19:28.000 --> 00:19:29.500 And so, let me just remind you of something. 00:19:30.779 --> 00:19:32.179 This command to submit 00:19:32.179 --> 00:19:34.079 that's aimed at wives, 00:19:35.079 --> 00:19:38.339 this is not a command 00:19:38.339 --> 00:19:40.059 to diminish your worth. 00:19:40.059 --> 00:19:45.619 This is not a diminishing of your value in God's eyes. 00:19:46.740 --> 00:19:50.279 This isn't God saying you're of lesser importance. 00:19:52.220 --> 00:19:56.319 This is God calling you to a particular role in marriage. 00:19:57.419 --> 00:19:58.940 A particular responsibility. 00:19:59.559 --> 00:20:02.839 And He's going to bring definition to that role. 00:20:02.839 --> 00:20:08.819 The word submit means to actually to line up in order. 00:20:09.919 --> 00:20:13.099 It means to come under authority. 00:20:14.099 --> 00:20:15.579 And what we've talked about before 00:20:15.579 --> 00:20:16.819 when we were talking about headship 00:20:16.819 --> 00:20:19.980 is that what God is calling a wife to 00:20:19.980 --> 00:20:22.839 is to come under your husband's 00:20:22.839 --> 00:20:25.059 God-given responsibility to care for you. 00:20:25.339 --> 00:20:27.019 That's what God is calling you to hear. 00:20:27.819 --> 00:20:29.240 Come under His care. 00:20:29.240 --> 00:20:34.960 Come under His seeking of your welfare. 00:20:37.000 --> 00:20:40.039 Your husband is to be attentive to 00:20:40.039 --> 00:20:43.140 and caring about your spiritual welfare, 00:20:44.000 --> 00:20:46.339 your physical welfare, 00:20:47.099 --> 00:20:49.660 your emotional welfare, 00:20:50.380 --> 00:20:51.920 even your financial welfare. 00:20:53.680 --> 00:20:57.220 He's to provide for you and protect you. 00:20:57.220 --> 00:20:59.319 And if that's in place, 00:20:59.620 --> 00:21:01.620 that will make your submission to Him 00:21:01.620 --> 00:21:03.259 coming under His care 00:21:03.259 --> 00:21:05.299 a joy and a privilege. 00:21:06.980 --> 00:21:09.600 I know the question's in your head right now. 00:21:11.680 --> 00:21:16.539 What if my husband doesn't care? 00:21:17.880 --> 00:21:18.819 We'll come back to that. 00:21:20.319 --> 00:21:21.860 But what I want you to see here 00:21:21.860 --> 00:21:23.440 is that this call to submit 00:21:23.440 --> 00:21:25.860 is a call to entrust yourself 00:21:25.860 --> 00:21:27.120 to the care of your husband. 00:21:27.740 --> 00:21:29.000 And what we see in verse 24, 00:21:29.319 --> 00:21:31.620 it's you to do that in everything. 00:21:32.680 --> 00:21:33.120 Everything. 00:21:33.279 --> 00:21:34.460 And the meaning of that is 00:21:34.460 --> 00:21:36.380 every area of your life. 00:21:37.620 --> 00:21:38.339 Your husband, 00:21:39.000 --> 00:21:40.839 because of what God has called him to 00:21:40.839 --> 00:21:41.759 for your good, 00:21:42.240 --> 00:21:43.620 he needs to know 00:21:43.620 --> 00:21:44.900 what's going on in your life 00:21:44.900 --> 00:21:46.420 so he can care for you, 00:21:46.960 --> 00:21:48.220 not exploit you. 00:21:51.220 --> 00:21:52.220 Now, a couple other clarifications 00:21:52.819 --> 00:21:53.880 on this word submission. 00:21:53.880 --> 00:21:58.620 This call to submit 00:21:58.620 --> 00:22:01.760 is not a call to a forced submission. 00:22:02.800 --> 00:22:03.680 God's not saying, 00:22:04.320 --> 00:22:05.680 do this or else. 00:22:07.200 --> 00:22:10.100 This is a voluntary submission. 00:22:11.100 --> 00:22:11.900 Think of it this way. 00:22:12.220 --> 00:22:12.860 God's saying, 00:22:13.040 --> 00:22:13.900 oh, dear daughter, 00:22:14.420 --> 00:22:16.360 you of your own volition, 00:22:17.440 --> 00:22:18.880 trusting in me, 00:22:18.880 --> 00:22:21.080 entrust yourself fully 00:22:21.080 --> 00:22:21.740 to your husband. 00:22:24.660 --> 00:22:26.120 This is your role in the dance, 00:22:26.220 --> 00:22:26.460 sister. 00:22:28.540 --> 00:22:30.480 Let your husband lead you. 00:22:32.660 --> 00:22:33.780 And might I add this, 00:22:33.880 --> 00:22:34.780 this is not a call 00:22:34.780 --> 00:22:35.600 for all women 00:22:35.600 --> 00:22:37.240 to submit to all men. 00:22:37.240 --> 00:22:39.559 wives, 00:22:40.059 --> 00:22:43.359 submit to your own husbands. 00:22:45.120 --> 00:22:46.740 There's two mistakes in this dance. 00:22:46.839 --> 00:22:48.440 In order to demonstrate this to you, 00:22:48.500 --> 00:22:49.539 I'm going to actually use some dancing. 00:22:52.799 --> 00:22:53.880 There's two mistakes 00:22:53.880 --> 00:22:55.880 that both men and women 00:22:55.880 --> 00:22:57.099 can make in terms of roles, 00:22:57.319 --> 00:22:57.720 their roles. 00:22:58.140 --> 00:22:59.420 One's a mistake on one side 00:22:59.420 --> 00:23:00.039 of passivity, 00:23:00.220 --> 00:23:02.059 the other's a mistake 00:23:02.059 --> 00:23:03.059 of aggressiveness. 00:23:04.579 --> 00:23:04.960 And so, 00:23:05.180 --> 00:23:06.140 think about this. 00:23:06.140 --> 00:23:07.480 your husband 00:23:07.480 --> 00:23:09.000 wants to lead you 00:23:09.000 --> 00:23:09.780 in a dance 00:23:09.780 --> 00:23:11.240 called marriage. 00:23:11.840 --> 00:23:12.060 Okay? 00:23:13.180 --> 00:23:13.759 And so, 00:23:13.860 --> 00:23:15.259 here's what the mistake 00:23:15.259 --> 00:23:17.160 of passivity looks like. 00:23:18.000 --> 00:23:19.000 Your husband's seeking 00:23:19.000 --> 00:23:19.680 to lead you, 00:23:20.660 --> 00:23:21.480 doing his best, 00:23:21.740 --> 00:23:22.759 and he keeps on 00:23:22.759 --> 00:23:23.920 stepping on your toes. 00:23:25.220 --> 00:23:26.180 And that hurts. 00:23:27.240 --> 00:23:28.320 Passivity is like this. 00:23:28.780 --> 00:23:29.820 I'm not going to say anything. 00:23:30.460 --> 00:23:31.840 I don't want to hurt his feelings. 00:23:32.480 --> 00:23:32.700 You know, 00:23:32.720 --> 00:23:33.240 blah, blah, blah. 00:23:33.700 --> 00:23:34.320 It's kind of, 00:23:34.520 --> 00:23:35.820 this is going to say it coarsely, 00:23:35.819 --> 00:23:37.220 but it's kind of a put up 00:23:37.220 --> 00:23:38.240 and shut up mentality. 00:23:39.579 --> 00:23:40.819 That's not submission. 00:23:42.419 --> 00:23:43.939 The other mistake is this. 00:23:44.639 --> 00:23:45.339 Same thing. 00:23:45.419 --> 00:23:47.240 Husband leading his wife, 00:23:47.379 --> 00:23:47.879 dancing, 00:23:48.799 --> 00:23:50.200 steps on her toes, 00:23:50.460 --> 00:23:51.359 and the wife is like, 00:23:51.960 --> 00:23:53.099 swat! 00:23:53.159 --> 00:23:53.279 Swat! 00:23:57.099 --> 00:23:58.359 I'm taking over. 00:23:59.099 --> 00:24:00.519 I'm leading this dance. 00:24:00.519 --> 00:24:01.160 Yes, honey, 00:24:01.319 --> 00:24:02.599 I will dance the way 00:24:02.599 --> 00:24:03.940 that you want to dance. 00:24:07.160 --> 00:24:08.099 Two mistakes. 00:24:10.599 --> 00:24:12.420 What God is calling wives to 00:24:12.420 --> 00:24:13.379 is a joyful, 00:24:13.639 --> 00:24:15.920 voluntary following 00:24:15.920 --> 00:24:17.059 of her husband's lead. 00:24:18.119 --> 00:24:19.160 It's sweet. 00:24:20.279 --> 00:24:21.160 Dancing's fun. 00:24:22.400 --> 00:24:22.639 And so, 00:24:22.700 --> 00:24:23.420 here's how it works out. 00:24:23.420 --> 00:24:25.880 This is an example 00:24:25.880 --> 00:24:26.640 of what it looks like. 00:24:27.360 --> 00:24:27.740 Alright? 00:24:29.360 --> 00:24:30.019 You're dancing 00:24:30.019 --> 00:24:30.900 with your wife. 00:24:32.720 --> 00:24:33.880 And she says, 00:24:34.320 --> 00:24:34.600 honey, 00:24:34.980 --> 00:24:36.440 your breath stinks. 00:24:38.640 --> 00:24:39.000 Sweetheart, 00:24:39.039 --> 00:24:39.640 I am so glad 00:24:39.640 --> 00:24:40.100 to know that 00:24:40.100 --> 00:24:41.019 because I don't want 00:24:41.019 --> 00:24:41.940 to have cursed breath. 00:24:42.019 --> 00:24:42.420 I want to have 00:24:42.420 --> 00:24:43.180 blessing breath. 00:24:43.759 --> 00:24:44.060 And so, 00:24:44.140 --> 00:24:45.120 let me put a mint in. 00:24:45.300 --> 00:24:46.060 We keep on dancing. 00:24:47.019 --> 00:24:47.340 Okay? 00:24:47.600 --> 00:24:48.240 Dance, dance, dance. 00:24:48.620 --> 00:24:48.960 Sweetheart, 00:24:49.019 --> 00:24:50.160 you're stepping on my toes 00:24:50.160 --> 00:24:50.900 and it really hurts. 00:24:50.900 --> 00:24:52.920 Oh, I'm so sorry, honey. 00:24:52.980 --> 00:24:54.100 I don't want to hurt you. 00:24:54.380 --> 00:24:56.340 I want you to enjoy the dance. 00:24:56.620 --> 00:24:57.519 Can you help me 00:24:57.519 --> 00:24:59.380 get these footwork down? 00:24:59.680 --> 00:25:00.540 Kind of a thing. 00:25:01.360 --> 00:25:01.700 And then, 00:25:01.820 --> 00:25:02.860 maybe your wife 00:25:02.860 --> 00:25:03.780 says something like this. 00:25:04.060 --> 00:25:04.660 You know, honey, 00:25:05.200 --> 00:25:06.360 I'm seeing that punch bowl 00:25:06.360 --> 00:25:06.780 over there 00:25:06.780 --> 00:25:07.640 and I'm really thirsty. 00:25:08.000 --> 00:25:08.540 Okay, honey, 00:25:08.700 --> 00:25:09.900 let's go over there. 00:25:14.080 --> 00:25:14.560 Gotcha. 00:25:16.160 --> 00:25:17.120 Keep on dancing. 00:25:19.200 --> 00:25:20.200 Your wife says, 00:25:20.200 --> 00:25:21.140 honey, 00:25:21.180 --> 00:25:22.160 I need to use the bathroom. 00:25:22.580 --> 00:25:23.299 I got you, honey. 00:25:23.559 --> 00:25:24.220 Let's go this way. 00:25:24.420 --> 00:25:24.880 Out of the way. 00:25:25.180 --> 00:25:25.620 Out of the way. 00:25:25.819 --> 00:25:26.380 Out of the way. 00:25:28.519 --> 00:25:28.920 Sweetheart, 00:25:29.140 --> 00:25:30.360 I'm feeling tired. 00:25:30.740 --> 00:25:32.400 I will scoop you up. 00:25:33.200 --> 00:25:34.559 Put you in this chair. 00:25:36.279 --> 00:25:37.519 Thank you for letting me know. 00:25:39.740 --> 00:25:40.100 See? 00:25:40.100 --> 00:25:40.160 See? 00:25:47.900 --> 00:25:48.299 Wives, 00:25:48.340 --> 00:25:48.960 would you like that? 00:25:48.960 --> 00:25:55.259 Marriage is a dance. 00:25:57.019 --> 00:25:58.240 Husbands were called to lead. 00:26:01.360 --> 00:26:01.720 Collaboratively. 00:26:04.600 --> 00:26:05.940 Welcome your wife's input. 00:26:06.940 --> 00:26:08.200 In order for her 00:26:08.200 --> 00:26:09.880 to care for her welfare, 00:26:10.799 --> 00:26:12.380 you need to know 00:26:12.380 --> 00:26:13.539 how she's doing. 00:26:13.539 --> 00:26:16.480 in order to lead her well, 00:26:17.159 --> 00:26:18.680 she needs to feel comfortable 00:26:18.680 --> 00:26:19.940 and safe 00:26:19.940 --> 00:26:21.740 to be able to say, 00:26:22.440 --> 00:26:23.779 you're stepping on my toes 00:26:23.779 --> 00:26:24.819 again. 00:26:29.759 --> 00:26:30.859 I love this. 00:26:32.539 --> 00:26:32.980 Sisters, 00:26:33.379 --> 00:26:34.779 the way to steer clear 00:26:34.779 --> 00:26:35.879 of these mistakes 00:26:35.879 --> 00:26:39.319 is to keep your eyes on Jesus. 00:26:39.319 --> 00:26:42.519 look at Ephesians 4. 00:26:42.519 --> 00:26:42.539 Ephesians 4. 00:26:42.619 --> 00:26:43.039 22. 00:26:44.399 --> 00:26:45.679 This is the motive 00:26:45.679 --> 00:26:47.480 of submission. 00:26:49.480 --> 00:26:49.919 Wives, 00:26:50.019 --> 00:26:51.299 submit to your own husbands 00:26:51.299 --> 00:26:57.379 as to the Lord. 00:26:57.939 --> 00:26:59.200 Will you say that with me, 00:26:59.279 --> 00:26:59.539 everybody? 00:26:59.539 --> 00:27:04.180 as to the Lord. 00:27:04.180 --> 00:27:05.980 You may submit 00:27:05.980 --> 00:27:07.299 to your husband, 00:27:08.299 --> 00:27:10.019 but you are submitting 00:27:10.019 --> 00:27:11.879 for Jesus. 00:27:14.480 --> 00:27:15.480 Better yet, 00:27:15.879 --> 00:27:18.180 the aim of your entrusting yourself 00:27:18.180 --> 00:27:19.339 to your husband's care 00:27:19.339 --> 00:27:21.099 is obedience 00:27:21.099 --> 00:27:22.980 to Christ. 00:27:22.980 --> 00:27:25.140 You are to live out 00:27:25.140 --> 00:27:26.480 your role as a wife 00:27:26.480 --> 00:27:27.860 as to the Lord. 00:27:28.740 --> 00:27:29.819 Your relationship 00:27:29.819 --> 00:27:31.299 to Christ 00:27:31.299 --> 00:27:32.480 informs 00:27:32.480 --> 00:27:33.819 and directs 00:27:33.819 --> 00:27:34.740 your relationship 00:27:34.740 --> 00:27:36.380 to your husband. 00:27:37.559 --> 00:27:38.680 You will fulfill 00:27:38.680 --> 00:27:39.860 your role as a wife. 00:27:40.160 --> 00:27:40.740 You must 00:27:40.740 --> 00:27:41.759 out of obedience 00:27:41.759 --> 00:27:42.860 to Jesus. 00:27:43.180 --> 00:27:43.599 Ultimately, 00:27:43.860 --> 00:27:45.120 it's about Jesus. 00:27:46.700 --> 00:27:47.660 So the way 00:27:47.660 --> 00:27:48.279 that you relate 00:27:48.279 --> 00:27:48.880 to your husband 00:27:48.880 --> 00:27:50.059 is a means 00:27:50.059 --> 00:27:51.120 by which you live 00:27:51.120 --> 00:27:51.960 for Christ. 00:27:52.980 --> 00:27:54.039 So when Paul says 00:27:54.039 --> 00:27:54.900 in Ephesians 4.1, 00:27:55.279 --> 00:27:55.759 walk in a manner 00:27:55.759 --> 00:27:56.519 worthy of the calling 00:27:56.519 --> 00:27:57.299 to which you've been called, 00:27:58.240 --> 00:27:59.640 that is specifically 00:27:59.640 --> 00:28:01.140 applied to a wife 00:28:01.140 --> 00:28:01.680 right here. 00:28:02.900 --> 00:28:03.839 Follow Jesus 00:28:03.839 --> 00:28:04.900 this way. 00:28:05.579 --> 00:28:06.120 Be filled 00:28:06.120 --> 00:28:06.980 by the Spirit 00:28:06.980 --> 00:28:07.680 so that you can 00:28:07.680 --> 00:28:08.640 do this faithfully. 00:28:14.220 --> 00:28:15.160 So here's what 00:28:15.160 --> 00:28:15.900 it boils down to. 00:28:16.819 --> 00:28:17.339 Sisters, 00:28:17.880 --> 00:28:18.700 married sisters, 00:28:19.920 --> 00:28:20.880 this morning 00:28:20.880 --> 00:28:22.120 I am calling you 00:28:22.119 --> 00:28:23.599 on the authority 00:28:23.599 --> 00:28:24.799 of this book 00:28:24.799 --> 00:28:26.899 to live out 00:28:26.899 --> 00:28:27.679 your role 00:28:27.679 --> 00:28:28.939 as a wife 00:28:28.939 --> 00:28:30.759 for the glory 00:28:30.759 --> 00:28:32.479 of Christ. 00:28:35.759 --> 00:28:36.979 It's all about Him. 00:28:38.759 --> 00:28:40.159 If Ephesians 1, 00:28:40.219 --> 00:28:40.439 9, 00:28:40.500 --> 00:28:40.759 and 10 00:28:40.759 --> 00:28:41.279 is true 00:28:41.279 --> 00:28:42.319 and God 00:28:42.319 --> 00:28:43.079 is in the process 00:28:43.079 --> 00:28:43.659 of uniting 00:28:43.659 --> 00:28:44.639 all things together 00:28:44.639 --> 00:28:45.359 in Christ, 00:28:45.859 --> 00:28:46.899 He's interested 00:28:46.899 --> 00:28:47.779 in uniting 00:28:47.779 --> 00:28:48.739 your marriage 00:28:48.740 --> 00:28:50.019 in Christ. 00:28:50.019 --> 00:28:51.940 In order to get 00:28:51.940 --> 00:28:52.640 that done, 00:28:52.960 --> 00:28:53.720 He's calling you 00:28:53.720 --> 00:28:55.160 to a specific role 00:28:55.160 --> 00:28:55.880 in that. 00:28:56.460 --> 00:28:57.259 To experience 00:28:57.259 --> 00:28:57.779 unity. 00:28:59.579 --> 00:29:00.319 And to that end, 00:29:00.920 --> 00:29:01.700 point five, 00:29:02.519 --> 00:29:03.259 the grounds 00:29:03.259 --> 00:29:05.039 for the roles. 00:29:07.120 --> 00:29:07.839 The grounds 00:29:07.839 --> 00:29:09.220 for a husband's 00:29:09.220 --> 00:29:10.039 role to be head, 00:29:10.759 --> 00:29:11.380 the grounds 00:29:11.380 --> 00:29:12.519 for a woman's 00:29:12.519 --> 00:29:13.660 role to be 00:29:13.660 --> 00:29:14.279 submissive. 00:29:14.279 --> 00:29:16.899 We can ask it 00:29:16.899 --> 00:29:17.299 this way. 00:29:18.039 --> 00:29:19.019 On what basis 00:29:19.019 --> 00:29:20.980 does the Apostle Paul 00:29:20.980 --> 00:29:21.940 call wives 00:29:21.940 --> 00:29:22.460 to submit 00:29:22.460 --> 00:29:23.240 to their husbands 00:29:23.240 --> 00:29:24.160 and husbands 00:29:24.160 --> 00:29:24.700 to be head 00:29:24.700 --> 00:29:25.220 of their wives? 00:29:25.279 --> 00:29:26.299 On what grounds? 00:29:27.299 --> 00:29:28.059 Let me just read 00:29:28.059 --> 00:29:29.319 verses 23 and 24. 00:29:30.039 --> 00:29:30.779 You will see 00:29:30.779 --> 00:29:31.440 the grounds. 00:29:34.200 --> 00:29:35.079 For the husband 00:29:35.079 --> 00:29:35.700 is the head 00:29:35.700 --> 00:29:36.299 of the wife 00:29:36.299 --> 00:29:37.980 even as Christ 00:29:37.980 --> 00:29:38.480 is the head 00:29:38.480 --> 00:29:39.059 of the church, 00:29:39.139 --> 00:29:39.599 His body. 00:29:39.980 --> 00:29:41.299 And He is Himself 00:29:41.299 --> 00:29:41.740 its Savior. 00:29:41.879 --> 00:29:42.740 Now as the church 00:29:42.740 --> 00:29:43.619 submits to Christ, 00:29:43.619 --> 00:29:44.679 so also wives 00:29:44.679 --> 00:29:45.619 should submit 00:29:45.619 --> 00:29:46.319 to everything 00:29:46.319 --> 00:29:47.159 to their husbands. 00:29:47.479 --> 00:29:47.879 Did you know 00:29:47.879 --> 00:29:48.379 there's another 00:29:48.379 --> 00:29:49.239 dance going on? 00:29:50.739 --> 00:29:52.079 Between Christ 00:29:52.079 --> 00:29:53.279 and His church? 00:29:56.039 --> 00:29:56.919 And we see 00:29:56.919 --> 00:29:57.519 those roles 00:29:57.519 --> 00:29:58.359 played out. 00:29:59.299 --> 00:30:00.179 Jesus is the head 00:30:00.179 --> 00:30:01.919 exercising His leadership 00:30:01.919 --> 00:30:02.639 for the welfare 00:30:02.639 --> 00:30:03.679 of His people 00:30:03.679 --> 00:30:05.059 and His people 00:30:05.059 --> 00:30:06.179 submissive, 00:30:06.559 --> 00:30:07.839 dependent upon, 00:30:08.379 --> 00:30:09.359 following Him. 00:30:11.299 --> 00:30:12.679 These are the grounds 00:30:12.680 --> 00:30:14.259 and they also 00:30:14.259 --> 00:30:15.840 help us to see, 00:30:16.320 --> 00:30:18.320 model the distinct roles 00:30:18.320 --> 00:30:19.620 for a husband and wife. 00:30:20.039 --> 00:30:21.519 Our roles are grounded 00:30:21.519 --> 00:30:23.299 upon Christ 00:30:23.299 --> 00:30:24.900 and the church. 00:30:29.900 --> 00:30:31.320 If we take our cues 00:30:31.320 --> 00:30:31.940 from something, 00:30:32.940 --> 00:30:34.680 it can't be our culture. 00:30:34.680 --> 00:30:38.000 we must take our cues 00:30:38.000 --> 00:30:39.620 from our Bibles. 00:30:40.640 --> 00:30:41.620 And what we're given here 00:30:41.620 --> 00:30:43.400 is the cue, 00:30:43.900 --> 00:30:45.860 a model of Christ 00:30:45.860 --> 00:30:47.100 and the church. 00:30:47.900 --> 00:30:48.720 Check this out. 00:30:49.360 --> 00:30:50.720 What Adam and Eve 00:30:50.720 --> 00:30:52.680 distorted because of their sin, 00:30:53.500 --> 00:30:55.380 Christ has redeemed. 00:30:56.700 --> 00:30:58.180 And in relationship 00:30:58.180 --> 00:30:59.620 to His church, 00:30:59.960 --> 00:31:01.539 He has demonstrated 00:31:01.539 --> 00:31:02.980 what a restored 00:31:02.980 --> 00:31:04.240 marriage relationship 00:31:04.240 --> 00:31:05.119 looks like. 00:31:07.399 --> 00:31:08.559 He is the head. 00:31:10.299 --> 00:31:11.799 The church is His bride 00:31:11.799 --> 00:31:12.920 submitting to Him. 00:31:14.139 --> 00:31:15.159 What we also see 00:31:15.159 --> 00:31:16.579 in verses 23 and 24 00:31:16.579 --> 00:31:17.119 is this. 00:31:19.500 --> 00:31:21.139 This example of Jesus 00:31:21.139 --> 00:31:21.819 in the church 00:31:21.819 --> 00:31:23.559 as the grounds 00:31:23.559 --> 00:31:23.960 and model 00:31:23.960 --> 00:31:24.819 for our roles 00:31:24.819 --> 00:31:25.359 in marriage, 00:31:26.059 --> 00:31:27.619 this is timeless. 00:31:27.619 --> 00:31:30.439 This is unchanging. 00:31:32.299 --> 00:31:34.159 It's universally binding 00:31:34.159 --> 00:31:36.819 on not just Christians 00:31:36.819 --> 00:31:38.919 but on everybody. 00:31:42.059 --> 00:31:43.739 This is making a claim 00:31:43.739 --> 00:31:44.679 on us. 00:31:47.479 --> 00:31:48.039 Husbands, 00:31:49.000 --> 00:31:50.179 verse 23, 00:31:51.259 --> 00:31:52.039 here's your role. 00:31:53.339 --> 00:31:54.519 You're to be Christ-like 00:31:54.519 --> 00:31:55.459 in your marriage, 00:31:55.679 --> 00:31:56.159 in your role. 00:31:57.619 --> 00:31:58.599 The husband is the head 00:31:58.599 --> 00:31:59.119 of the wife 00:31:59.119 --> 00:32:00.659 just as Jesus 00:32:00.659 --> 00:32:01.659 is head of the church, 00:32:01.759 --> 00:32:02.379 His bride. 00:32:03.359 --> 00:32:04.219 Jesus is seeking 00:32:04.219 --> 00:32:05.339 to provide and protect 00:32:05.339 --> 00:32:06.319 for His bride. 00:32:07.099 --> 00:32:08.099 So we as husbands 00:32:08.099 --> 00:32:09.639 like to provide 00:32:09.639 --> 00:32:09.979 and protect 00:32:09.979 --> 00:32:11.019 for our brides. 00:32:12.539 --> 00:32:13.459 That word, 00:32:14.119 --> 00:32:14.419 head, 00:32:15.299 --> 00:32:16.139 carries the sense 00:32:16.139 --> 00:32:16.959 of authority 00:32:16.959 --> 00:32:18.839 and responsibility 00:32:18.839 --> 00:32:20.819 not 00:32:20.819 --> 00:32:22.059 tyranny. 00:32:24.279 --> 00:32:25.339 In verse 24, 00:32:25.479 --> 00:32:26.659 we see the wives rule. 00:32:26.660 --> 00:32:28.279 just as the church 00:32:28.279 --> 00:32:29.279 submits to Christ, 00:32:29.460 --> 00:32:30.920 so wives are to submit 00:32:30.920 --> 00:32:31.860 to their husbands. 00:32:32.640 --> 00:32:33.900 The church is actively 00:32:33.900 --> 00:32:34.940 entrusting herself 00:32:34.940 --> 00:32:35.620 to Christ. 00:32:35.940 --> 00:32:36.840 The church depends 00:32:36.840 --> 00:32:37.600 on Christ. 00:32:38.620 --> 00:32:39.580 The church doesn't 00:32:39.580 --> 00:32:40.120 take matters 00:32:40.120 --> 00:32:41.160 into her own hands. 00:32:42.800 --> 00:32:44.060 Doesn't steal the show 00:32:44.060 --> 00:32:45.800 and lead the dance. 00:32:48.240 --> 00:32:49.420 There are examples. 00:32:51.279 --> 00:32:52.240 A wife is to follow 00:32:52.240 --> 00:32:53.259 her husband's lead 00:32:53.259 --> 00:32:55.539 just as the church 00:32:55.539 --> 00:32:56.480 submits to Christ. 00:32:58.279 --> 00:32:59.359 Our roles in marriage 00:32:59.359 --> 00:32:59.859 are grounded 00:32:59.859 --> 00:33:00.319 and modeled 00:33:00.319 --> 00:33:01.059 after the roles 00:33:01.059 --> 00:33:01.559 of Christ 00:33:01.559 --> 00:33:02.119 and His bride, 00:33:02.200 --> 00:33:02.640 the church. 00:33:03.759 --> 00:33:04.539 Isn't it good 00:33:04.539 --> 00:33:05.220 that God doesn't 00:33:05.220 --> 00:33:05.920 leave us guessing? 00:33:07.099 --> 00:33:07.799 Very clear. 00:33:11.220 --> 00:33:11.859 The goal, 00:33:12.019 --> 00:33:12.279 of course, 00:33:12.339 --> 00:33:12.839 is unity. 00:33:14.519 --> 00:33:14.920 Harmony. 00:33:14.920 --> 00:33:18.920 Just to draw 00:33:18.920 --> 00:33:19.740 out one implication 00:33:19.740 --> 00:33:20.240 of this, 00:33:20.680 --> 00:33:21.519 God's design 00:33:21.519 --> 00:33:22.120 for the roles 00:33:22.120 --> 00:33:22.640 in marriage, 00:33:23.300 --> 00:33:23.900 being that they're 00:33:23.900 --> 00:33:24.340 timeless 00:33:24.340 --> 00:33:25.259 and unchanging 00:33:25.259 --> 00:33:26.240 and universally 00:33:26.240 --> 00:33:26.759 binding, 00:33:27.860 --> 00:33:28.400 they're true 00:33:28.400 --> 00:33:29.500 whatever culture 00:33:29.500 --> 00:33:30.300 that you're in. 00:33:31.340 --> 00:33:32.380 We are not 00:33:32.380 --> 00:33:33.300 to redefine 00:33:33.300 --> 00:33:33.800 our roles 00:33:33.800 --> 00:33:34.500 in marriage 00:33:34.500 --> 00:33:36.240 because 00:33:36.240 --> 00:33:37.700 our roles 00:33:37.700 --> 00:33:38.200 in marriage 00:33:38.200 --> 00:33:39.320 aren't culture 00:33:39.320 --> 00:33:39.920 bound. 00:33:39.920 --> 00:33:42.140 they're 00:33:42.140 --> 00:33:43.160 grounded 00:33:43.160 --> 00:33:43.880 in a timeless 00:33:43.880 --> 00:33:44.380 truth, 00:33:44.759 --> 00:33:45.720 Christ and His bride. 00:33:47.340 --> 00:33:48.340 This is God's 00:33:48.340 --> 00:33:48.960 design 00:33:48.960 --> 00:33:51.039 for us. 00:33:54.039 --> 00:33:55.039 Let me move 00:33:55.039 --> 00:33:55.940 to some conclusions 00:33:55.940 --> 00:33:56.700 and some 00:33:56.700 --> 00:33:57.840 application questions. 00:34:01.820 --> 00:34:02.720 When God 00:34:02.720 --> 00:34:03.480 created Adam 00:34:03.480 --> 00:34:03.900 and Eve, 00:34:04.800 --> 00:34:05.519 He created them 00:34:05.519 --> 00:34:06.360 both in His image. 00:34:07.880 --> 00:34:08.539 Men and women 00:34:08.539 --> 00:34:09.820 are of equal value 00:34:09.820 --> 00:34:11.019 in God's eyes. 00:34:12.500 --> 00:34:13.180 God's committed 00:34:13.180 --> 00:34:13.519 to that. 00:34:15.340 --> 00:34:15.700 Men. 00:34:16.700 --> 00:34:17.620 Men in the room. 00:34:20.100 --> 00:34:21.019 Are you 00:34:21.019 --> 00:34:21.600 trusting 00:34:21.600 --> 00:34:23.320 in what 00:34:23.320 --> 00:34:24.519 God says 00:34:24.519 --> 00:34:26.000 about the 00:34:26.000 --> 00:34:26.380 worth 00:34:26.380 --> 00:34:27.680 of women? 00:34:30.080 --> 00:34:30.820 Do you 00:34:30.820 --> 00:34:31.300 think that 00:34:31.300 --> 00:34:31.760 you're more 00:34:31.760 --> 00:34:32.620 valuable than 00:34:32.620 --> 00:34:32.940 a woman 00:34:32.940 --> 00:34:33.519 because you 00:34:33.519 --> 00:34:34.300 are a man? 00:34:35.740 --> 00:34:36.660 That's not 00:34:36.660 --> 00:34:37.080 what God 00:34:37.080 --> 00:34:37.440 thinks. 00:34:37.440 --> 00:34:39.860 be honest, 00:34:40.240 --> 00:34:41.079 humble yourself, 00:34:41.079 --> 00:34:42.619 and confess 00:34:42.619 --> 00:34:43.200 it. 00:34:45.280 --> 00:34:46.079 Women, 00:34:46.720 --> 00:34:48.179 are you 00:34:48.179 --> 00:34:49.099 trusting in 00:34:49.099 --> 00:34:49.659 what God 00:34:49.659 --> 00:34:50.500 says about 00:34:50.500 --> 00:34:51.400 your worth? 00:34:52.880 --> 00:34:54.220 Your worth 00:34:54.220 --> 00:34:54.820 is not 00:34:54.820 --> 00:34:55.679 found in 00:34:55.679 --> 00:34:56.880 your role. 00:34:58.159 --> 00:34:59.019 Your worth 00:34:59.019 --> 00:35:00.159 is found 00:35:00.159 --> 00:35:00.740 in being 00:35:00.740 --> 00:35:01.579 an image 00:35:01.579 --> 00:35:02.159 bearer 00:35:02.159 --> 00:35:03.179 of God. 00:35:03.179 --> 00:35:05.500 Do you 00:35:05.500 --> 00:35:05.859 think you 00:35:05.859 --> 00:35:06.239 are less 00:35:06.239 --> 00:35:06.879 valuable 00:35:06.879 --> 00:35:08.399 than a man? 00:35:09.719 --> 00:35:10.460 God does 00:35:10.460 --> 00:35:10.919 not think 00:35:10.919 --> 00:35:11.399 that of you. 00:35:13.159 --> 00:35:14.000 Trust in 00:35:14.000 --> 00:35:14.699 what He 00:35:14.699 --> 00:35:15.279 says 00:35:15.279 --> 00:35:15.859 is true 00:35:15.859 --> 00:35:16.259 of you. 00:35:20.599 --> 00:35:21.099 Another 00:35:21.099 --> 00:35:21.960 concluding point, 00:35:22.299 --> 00:35:23.079 headship is 00:35:23.079 --> 00:35:24.659 a God-given 00:35:24.659 --> 00:35:25.759 responsibility. 00:35:27.379 --> 00:35:28.019 Husbands, 00:35:28.019 --> 00:35:30.380 in what 00:35:30.380 --> 00:35:31.300 ways 00:35:31.300 --> 00:35:32.579 have you 00:35:32.579 --> 00:35:32.800 been 00:35:32.800 --> 00:35:33.880 exercising 00:35:33.880 --> 00:35:34.920 this 00:35:34.920 --> 00:35:35.820 God-given 00:35:35.820 --> 00:35:36.699 responsibility 00:35:36.699 --> 00:35:38.340 for your 00:35:38.340 --> 00:35:39.000 own 00:35:39.000 --> 00:35:39.739 selfish 00:35:39.739 --> 00:35:40.460 ends 00:35:40.460 --> 00:35:41.940 instead 00:35:41.940 --> 00:35:42.440 of 00:35:42.440 --> 00:35:43.619 your 00:35:43.619 --> 00:35:44.400 wife's 00:35:44.400 --> 00:35:45.019 welfare? 00:35:46.099 --> 00:35:46.380 Another 00:35:46.380 --> 00:35:46.659 way to 00:35:46.659 --> 00:35:47.039 ask it 00:35:47.039 --> 00:35:47.519 is this. 00:35:48.599 --> 00:35:49.199 How 00:35:49.199 --> 00:35:49.639 have you 00:35:49.639 --> 00:35:49.820 been 00:35:49.820 --> 00:35:50.239 using 00:35:50.239 --> 00:35:50.579 your 00:35:50.579 --> 00:35:51.219 role 00:35:51.219 --> 00:35:52.320 to put 00:35:52.320 --> 00:35:52.780 yourself 00:35:52.780 --> 00:35:53.460 first? 00:35:54.880 --> 00:35:55.420 God's 00:35:55.420 --> 00:35:55.639 going to 00:35:55.639 --> 00:35:56.099 call you 00:35:56.099 --> 00:35:56.900 to not 00:35:56.900 --> 00:35:57.280 do that 00:35:57.280 --> 00:35:57.639 anymore. 00:35:58.019 --> 00:35:58.880 to put 00:35:58.880 --> 00:35:59.079 your 00:35:59.079 --> 00:35:59.579 wife 00:35:59.579 --> 00:36:00.239 first. 00:36:01.400 --> 00:36:01.900 We'll 00:36:01.900 --> 00:36:02.239 see that 00:36:02.239 --> 00:36:02.719 next week. 00:36:04.739 --> 00:36:05.460 Wives, 00:36:06.059 --> 00:36:07.960 this is a 00:36:07.960 --> 00:36:08.500 hard question. 00:36:12.840 --> 00:36:13.659 Have you 00:36:13.659 --> 00:36:13.820 been 00:36:13.820 --> 00:36:14.420 resentful 00:36:14.420 --> 00:36:16.440 of male 00:36:16.440 --> 00:36:17.000 headship 00:36:17.000 --> 00:36:18.659 because 00:36:18.659 --> 00:36:19.400 certain men 00:36:19.400 --> 00:36:19.639 in your 00:36:19.639 --> 00:36:20.360 life have 00:36:20.360 --> 00:36:20.960 sinfully 00:36:20.960 --> 00:36:21.440 abused 00:36:21.440 --> 00:36:21.659 it? 00:36:21.659 --> 00:36:26.420 could it 00:36:26.420 --> 00:36:26.779 be 00:36:26.779 --> 00:36:29.339 that the 00:36:29.339 --> 00:36:29.639 fault 00:36:29.639 --> 00:36:30.440 lies with 00:36:30.440 --> 00:36:30.980 the man 00:36:30.980 --> 00:36:33.159 not in 00:36:33.159 --> 00:36:33.679 the design? 00:36:37.099 --> 00:36:38.099 I'm so 00:36:38.099 --> 00:36:38.619 sorry. 00:36:41.199 --> 00:36:42.460 I know 00:36:42.460 --> 00:36:43.879 women in 00:36:43.879 --> 00:36:44.699 this room 00:36:44.699 --> 00:36:46.399 who have 00:36:46.399 --> 00:36:46.799 been on the 00:36:46.799 --> 00:36:47.859 receiving end 00:36:47.860 --> 00:36:49.140 of abuse 00:36:49.140 --> 00:36:51.380 because a 00:36:51.380 --> 00:36:52.120 man 00:36:52.120 --> 00:36:54.120 misused 00:36:54.120 --> 00:36:54.579 his 00:36:54.579 --> 00:36:55.500 responsibility. 00:36:56.500 --> 00:36:57.280 I'm so 00:36:57.280 --> 00:36:57.780 sorry. 00:36:59.140 --> 00:37:00.000 That's not 00:37:00.000 --> 00:37:00.500 God's will 00:37:00.500 --> 00:37:01.019 for this. 00:37:02.400 --> 00:37:03.460 It's wrong. 00:37:06.160 --> 00:37:06.900 God would 00:37:06.900 --> 00:37:07.260 have it 00:37:07.260 --> 00:37:07.579 different. 00:37:11.579 --> 00:37:11.920 Let me 00:37:11.920 --> 00:37:12.260 just say 00:37:12.260 --> 00:37:12.660 this too. 00:37:13.039 --> 00:37:13.599 Not all 00:37:13.599 --> 00:37:14.240 men abuse 00:37:14.240 --> 00:37:15.019 the responsibility 00:37:15.019 --> 00:37:15.480 God has 00:37:15.480 --> 00:37:16.059 entrusted to 00:37:16.059 --> 00:37:16.180 them. 00:37:16.179 --> 00:37:16.619 Not all 00:37:16.619 --> 00:37:17.599 men abuse 00:37:17.599 --> 00:37:17.839 that. 00:37:31.599 --> 00:37:32.019 Third 00:37:32.019 --> 00:37:32.299 point. 00:37:33.960 --> 00:37:34.379 God's 00:37:34.379 --> 00:37:34.819 calling a 00:37:34.819 --> 00:37:35.159 wife to 00:37:35.159 --> 00:37:35.579 submit to 00:37:35.579 --> 00:37:36.000 her husband 00:37:36.000 --> 00:37:37.079 is a 00:37:37.079 --> 00:37:37.799 high calling. 00:37:38.679 --> 00:37:39.039 It's a 00:37:39.039 --> 00:37:39.559 high calling. 00:37:41.119 --> 00:37:41.619 It's a 00:37:41.619 --> 00:37:41.980 call to 00:37:41.980 --> 00:37:42.279 live a 00:37:42.279 --> 00:37:42.819 certain way 00:37:42.819 --> 00:37:43.559 for Christ. 00:37:43.699 --> 00:37:44.299 A specific 00:37:44.299 --> 00:37:44.699 way to 00:37:44.699 --> 00:37:45.219 walk in 00:37:45.219 --> 00:37:45.440 a manner 00:37:45.440 --> 00:37:45.980 worthy 00:37:45.980 --> 00:37:47.380 so 00:37:47.380 --> 00:37:47.860 husbands 00:37:47.860 --> 00:37:50.420 have you 00:37:50.420 --> 00:37:50.880 been joking 00:37:50.880 --> 00:37:51.440 about it? 00:37:52.519 --> 00:37:53.059 Have you 00:37:53.059 --> 00:37:53.420 been making 00:37:53.420 --> 00:37:53.900 light of 00:37:53.900 --> 00:37:54.139 that? 00:37:55.460 --> 00:37:55.740 Have you 00:37:55.740 --> 00:37:56.099 been making 00:37:56.099 --> 00:37:56.760 jokes about 00:37:56.760 --> 00:37:57.199 submission? 00:37:59.340 --> 00:37:59.639 You're 00:37:59.639 --> 00:38:01.240 undignifying 00:38:01.240 --> 00:38:01.740 your wife. 00:38:03.440 --> 00:38:04.000 You're 00:38:04.000 --> 00:38:04.400 belittling 00:38:04.400 --> 00:38:04.780 God's 00:38:04.780 --> 00:38:05.219 design. 00:38:06.820 --> 00:38:07.119 Do you 00:38:07.119 --> 00:38:07.860 realize that 00:38:07.860 --> 00:38:08.260 how your 00:38:08.260 --> 00:38:09.019 wife relates 00:38:09.019 --> 00:38:09.400 to you 00:38:09.400 --> 00:38:10.099 matters to 00:38:10.099 --> 00:38:10.619 Christ? 00:38:10.619 --> 00:38:11.619 God's 00:38:11.619 --> 00:38:12.059 love to 00:38:12.059 --> 00:38:12.819 Christ? 00:38:12.819 --> 00:38:13.900 It's 00:38:13.900 --> 00:38:14.319 ultimately 00:38:14.319 --> 00:38:15.199 about him. 00:38:15.960 --> 00:38:16.559 Wives, 00:38:17.559 --> 00:38:18.599 are you 00:38:18.599 --> 00:38:19.460 looking to 00:38:19.460 --> 00:38:20.019 Jesus 00:38:20.019 --> 00:38:22.420 to help 00:38:22.420 --> 00:38:22.699 you 00:38:22.699 --> 00:38:24.019 voluntarily 00:38:24.019 --> 00:38:24.779 entrust 00:38:24.779 --> 00:38:25.460 yourself to 00:38:25.460 --> 00:38:26.119 your husband's 00:38:26.119 --> 00:38:26.380 care? 00:38:27.059 --> 00:38:27.940 Are you 00:38:27.940 --> 00:38:28.319 submitting 00:38:28.319 --> 00:38:29.059 yourself to 00:38:29.059 --> 00:38:29.500 your husband 00:38:29.500 --> 00:38:31.099 for Christ's 00:38:31.099 --> 00:38:31.599 sake? 00:38:32.279 --> 00:38:33.000 Are you 00:38:33.000 --> 00:38:33.359 making it 00:38:33.359 --> 00:38:33.799 about you? 00:38:34.480 --> 00:38:35.000 Are you 00:38:35.000 --> 00:38:35.359 making it 00:38:35.359 --> 00:38:35.699 about your 00:38:35.699 --> 00:38:36.000 husband? 00:38:36.000 --> 00:38:37.460 make it 00:38:37.460 --> 00:38:38.579 about Jesus 00:38:38.579 --> 00:38:40.260 as to 00:38:40.260 --> 00:38:41.039 the 00:38:41.039 --> 00:38:41.860 Lord. 00:38:44.860 --> 00:38:45.820 Just one 00:38:45.820 --> 00:38:46.199 life 00:38:46.199 --> 00:38:47.960 which will 00:38:47.960 --> 00:38:48.460 soon be 00:38:48.460 --> 00:38:48.920 passed. 00:38:50.239 --> 00:38:50.980 Only what's 00:38:50.980 --> 00:38:51.380 done for 00:38:51.380 --> 00:38:51.980 Christ will 00:38:51.980 --> 00:38:52.320 last. 00:38:54.940 --> 00:38:55.920 Now, I'm 00:38:55.920 --> 00:38:56.300 guessing 00:38:56.300 --> 00:38:57.880 that about 00:38:57.880 --> 00:38:58.559 halfway through 00:38:58.559 --> 00:38:59.079 this sermon, 00:39:00.119 --> 00:39:00.980 you began 00:39:00.980 --> 00:39:01.639 asking a 00:39:01.639 --> 00:39:02.019 what-if 00:39:02.019 --> 00:39:02.500 question. 00:39:03.139 --> 00:39:03.420 I was 00:39:03.420 --> 00:39:04.099 talking about 00:39:04.099 --> 00:39:05.320 the command 00:39:05.320 --> 00:39:06.220 to wife to 00:39:06.220 --> 00:39:06.720 submit to 00:39:06.720 --> 00:39:07.240 their husbands 00:39:07.240 --> 00:39:08.300 and I 00:39:08.300 --> 00:39:08.860 said that if 00:39:08.860 --> 00:39:09.380 your husband 00:39:09.380 --> 00:39:10.340 was exercising 00:39:10.340 --> 00:39:11.240 his responsibility 00:39:11.240 --> 00:39:12.059 in a Christ-like 00:39:12.059 --> 00:39:12.539 fashion, 00:39:13.980 --> 00:39:14.440 submitting to 00:39:14.440 --> 00:39:14.800 him would be 00:39:14.800 --> 00:39:15.180 a joy and 00:39:15.180 --> 00:39:15.620 a privilege 00:39:15.620 --> 00:39:16.519 because you 00:39:16.519 --> 00:39:16.980 know he's 00:39:16.980 --> 00:39:17.600 in it for 00:39:17.600 --> 00:39:18.080 your welfare. 00:39:20.280 --> 00:39:21.260 But what 00:39:21.260 --> 00:39:22.240 if a husband 00:39:22.240 --> 00:39:22.880 is not 00:39:22.880 --> 00:39:23.740 seeking his 00:39:23.740 --> 00:39:24.240 wife's 00:39:24.240 --> 00:39:24.620 welfare? 00:39:25.780 --> 00:39:26.200 Isn't that 00:39:26.200 --> 00:39:26.640 the question? 00:39:28.059 --> 00:39:28.380 Anybody 00:39:28.380 --> 00:39:28.820 ask that 00:39:28.820 --> 00:39:29.100 question? 00:39:31.940 --> 00:39:32.519 Worse 00:39:32.519 --> 00:39:32.840 yet, 00:39:32.840 --> 00:39:35.460 what if 00:39:35.460 --> 00:39:36.260 the husband 00:39:36.260 --> 00:39:38.240 is actually 00:39:38.240 --> 00:39:38.860 using his 00:39:38.860 --> 00:39:39.720 role to 00:39:39.720 --> 00:39:40.280 harm his 00:39:40.280 --> 00:39:40.559 wife? 00:39:41.600 --> 00:39:42.420 Does she 00:39:42.420 --> 00:39:43.579 still need 00:39:43.579 --> 00:39:44.620 to submit 00:39:44.620 --> 00:39:45.180 to him? 00:39:48.460 --> 00:39:49.120 Let me 00:39:49.120 --> 00:39:49.539 answer that 00:39:49.539 --> 00:39:50.059 question this 00:39:50.059 --> 00:39:50.280 way. 00:39:51.039 --> 00:39:51.420 This is 00:39:51.420 --> 00:39:51.600 going to 00:39:51.600 --> 00:39:51.960 take a 00:39:51.960 --> 00:39:52.140 couple 00:39:52.140 --> 00:39:52.579 minutes and 00:39:52.579 --> 00:39:52.900 we're done. 00:39:55.180 --> 00:39:55.740 First, 00:39:56.740 --> 00:39:58.820 if you're 00:39:58.820 --> 00:39:59.380 experiencing 00:39:59.380 --> 00:39:59.760 that, 00:40:00.220 --> 00:40:00.920 there is a 00:40:00.920 --> 00:40:01.539 misuse of 00:40:01.539 --> 00:40:02.099 responsibility 00:40:02.099 --> 00:40:02.840 going on. 00:40:03.639 --> 00:40:03.940 It's 00:40:03.940 --> 00:40:04.579 grievous in 00:40:04.579 --> 00:40:04.940 God's 00:40:04.940 --> 00:40:05.179 sight. 00:40:06.099 --> 00:40:06.420 Let's 00:40:06.420 --> 00:40:06.940 agree on 00:40:06.940 --> 00:40:07.179 that. 00:40:08.500 --> 00:40:08.920 Second, 00:40:10.019 --> 00:40:10.779 as a 00:40:10.779 --> 00:40:11.400 follower of 00:40:11.400 --> 00:40:11.679 Jesus, 00:40:12.400 --> 00:40:13.279 you are to 00:40:13.279 --> 00:40:13.900 live for 00:40:13.900 --> 00:40:15.980 Jesus no 00:40:15.980 --> 00:40:16.659 matter how 00:40:16.659 --> 00:40:17.199 your husband 00:40:17.199 --> 00:40:17.719 is treating 00:40:17.719 --> 00:40:18.059 you. 00:40:19.119 --> 00:40:19.920 It's about 00:40:19.920 --> 00:40:20.440 Christ. 00:40:21.800 --> 00:40:22.320 Your 00:40:22.320 --> 00:40:22.820 relationship 00:40:22.820 --> 00:40:23.500 with Christ 00:40:23.500 --> 00:40:24.279 informs and 00:40:24.279 --> 00:40:24.739 directs your 00:40:24.739 --> 00:40:25.179 relationship 00:40:25.179 --> 00:40:25.599 with your 00:40:25.599 --> 00:40:25.920 husband, 00:40:26.239 --> 00:40:26.719 whether he's 00:40:26.719 --> 00:40:27.179 walking in 00:40:27.179 --> 00:40:28.320 obedience or 00:40:28.320 --> 00:40:28.880 disobedience, 00:40:29.139 --> 00:40:29.699 whether he's a 00:40:29.699 --> 00:40:30.340 Christian or a 00:40:30.340 --> 00:40:30.800 non-Christian, 00:40:30.800 --> 00:40:31.600 whether he's 00:40:31.600 --> 00:40:32.160 more mature 00:40:32.160 --> 00:40:32.740 than you or 00:40:32.740 --> 00:40:33.420 less mature 00:40:33.420 --> 00:40:33.860 than you, 00:40:35.400 --> 00:40:37.300 Christ leads 00:40:37.300 --> 00:40:39.519 you on as 00:40:39.519 --> 00:40:39.860 to the 00:40:39.860 --> 00:40:40.140 Lord. 00:40:43.080 --> 00:40:43.600 But, 00:40:44.600 --> 00:40:47.640 you are not 00:40:47.640 --> 00:40:48.320 to submit to 00:40:48.320 --> 00:40:48.840 your husband 00:40:48.840 --> 00:40:50.860 if he's 00:40:50.860 --> 00:40:51.780 commanding you 00:40:51.780 --> 00:40:52.220 to do 00:40:52.220 --> 00:40:52.900 something that 00:40:52.900 --> 00:40:53.940 God forbids 00:40:53.940 --> 00:40:56.080 or forbidding 00:40:56.080 --> 00:40:56.860 something that 00:40:56.860 --> 00:40:57.800 God commands 00:40:57.800 --> 00:40:58.300 you to do 00:40:58.300 --> 00:41:00.360 because your 00:41:00.360 --> 00:41:01.519 primary devotion 00:41:01.519 --> 00:41:02.820 is to 00:41:02.820 --> 00:41:03.640 Christ. 00:41:04.440 --> 00:41:05.220 Get it? 00:41:09.600 --> 00:41:10.100 Now, 00:41:10.160 --> 00:41:10.480 here's where 00:41:10.480 --> 00:41:10.960 things get 00:41:10.960 --> 00:41:11.960 kind of brass 00:41:11.960 --> 00:41:12.380 tacks. 00:41:13.800 --> 00:41:14.680 If you are 00:41:14.680 --> 00:41:15.500 a wife in 00:41:15.500 --> 00:41:16.000 this kind of 00:41:16.000 --> 00:41:16.620 situation, 00:41:17.620 --> 00:41:19.800 that word 00:41:19.800 --> 00:41:21.220 submit is a 00:41:21.220 --> 00:41:21.860 really difficult 00:41:21.860 --> 00:41:22.519 word to kind 00:41:22.519 --> 00:41:23.500 of make fit 00:41:23.500 --> 00:41:24.780 into a 00:41:24.780 --> 00:41:25.600 situation when 00:41:25.600 --> 00:41:26.340 there's difficulty 00:41:26.340 --> 00:41:26.920 going on in 00:41:26.920 --> 00:41:27.360 abuse. 00:41:28.860 --> 00:41:29.240 So, 00:41:29.320 --> 00:41:30.000 let me suggest 00:41:30.000 --> 00:41:31.180 another biblical 00:41:31.180 --> 00:41:31.980 word for the 00:41:31.980 --> 00:41:32.600 role of life, 00:41:33.220 --> 00:41:33.579 helper, 00:41:34.220 --> 00:41:34.539 found in 00:41:34.539 --> 00:41:35.220 Genesis chapter 00:41:35.220 --> 00:41:35.519 2. 00:41:36.740 --> 00:41:37.340 If your 00:41:37.340 --> 00:41:38.039 husband is not 00:41:38.039 --> 00:41:38.579 seeking your 00:41:38.579 --> 00:41:39.480 welfare or is 00:41:39.480 --> 00:41:39.940 doing your 00:41:39.940 --> 00:41:40.360 harm, 00:41:40.800 --> 00:41:41.600 the question that 00:41:41.600 --> 00:41:42.140 you need to be 00:41:42.140 --> 00:41:42.559 asking, 00:41:42.800 --> 00:41:43.079 though it's 00:41:43.079 --> 00:41:43.640 difficult to 00:41:43.640 --> 00:41:44.220 ask in that 00:41:44.220 --> 00:41:44.760 context, 00:41:45.760 --> 00:41:46.940 is what does 00:41:46.940 --> 00:41:47.559 it look like 00:41:47.559 --> 00:41:48.140 for you to 00:41:48.140 --> 00:41:49.000 help him in 00:41:49.000 --> 00:41:49.539 the name of 00:41:49.539 --> 00:41:50.380 Jesus even 00:41:50.380 --> 00:41:50.920 though you're 00:41:50.920 --> 00:41:51.660 being hurt? 00:41:51.659 --> 00:41:55.480 And in 00:41:55.480 --> 00:41:55.940 order to get 00:41:55.940 --> 00:41:56.239 your head 00:41:56.239 --> 00:41:56.639 around the 00:41:56.639 --> 00:41:56.980 answer to 00:41:56.980 --> 00:41:57.639 that question, 00:41:58.799 --> 00:41:59.399 you need 00:41:59.399 --> 00:41:59.679 help. 00:42:02.000 --> 00:42:02.719 You need 00:42:02.719 --> 00:42:03.239 wise, 00:42:03.460 --> 00:42:03.920 compassionate 00:42:03.920 --> 00:42:04.440 counsel. 00:42:05.779 --> 00:42:06.480 And that's 00:42:06.480 --> 00:42:07.019 why God has 00:42:07.019 --> 00:42:07.839 provided godly 00:42:07.839 --> 00:42:08.339 friends and 00:42:08.339 --> 00:42:08.940 godly leaders. 00:42:10.539 --> 00:42:11.460 If you're a 00:42:11.460 --> 00:42:12.480 woman in 00:42:12.480 --> 00:42:12.839 need of 00:42:12.839 --> 00:42:13.199 help, 00:42:14.539 --> 00:42:15.059 the elders 00:42:15.059 --> 00:42:15.679 of this 00:42:15.679 --> 00:42:16.619 church are 00:42:16.619 --> 00:42:17.219 here to 00:42:17.219 --> 00:42:17.779 help you. 00:42:19.259 --> 00:42:19.960 We want 00:42:19.960 --> 00:42:20.359 to do you 00:42:20.359 --> 00:42:20.659 good. 00:42:22.319 --> 00:42:22.899 We want 00:42:22.899 --> 00:42:23.359 to provide 00:42:23.359 --> 00:42:23.839 and protect 00:42:23.839 --> 00:42:24.159 for you 00:42:24.159 --> 00:42:24.599 within our 00:42:24.599 --> 00:42:24.960 roles. 00:42:27.739 --> 00:42:28.339 But if 00:42:28.339 --> 00:42:28.579 you're a 00:42:28.579 --> 00:42:28.879 woman in 00:42:28.879 --> 00:42:29.559 this situation, 00:42:30.440 --> 00:42:30.799 you need 00:42:30.799 --> 00:42:31.500 to take a 00:42:31.500 --> 00:42:31.899 courageous 00:42:31.899 --> 00:42:32.399 step. 00:42:34.859 --> 00:42:35.500 I know 00:42:35.500 --> 00:42:36.039 there's shame. 00:42:36.659 --> 00:42:37.000 I know 00:42:37.000 --> 00:42:37.179 there's 00:42:37.179 --> 00:42:37.539 disgrace. 00:42:38.239 --> 00:42:38.539 I know 00:42:38.539 --> 00:42:38.739 there's 00:42:38.739 --> 00:42:39.299 embarrassment. 00:42:39.960 --> 00:42:40.279 I know 00:42:40.279 --> 00:42:40.500 there can 00:42:40.500 --> 00:42:41.099 be threats. 00:42:42.519 --> 00:42:43.579 But to 00:42:43.579 --> 00:42:44.079 bring this 00:42:44.079 --> 00:42:44.500 into the 00:42:44.500 --> 00:42:46.379 light is 00:42:46.379 --> 00:42:46.920 the way 00:42:46.920 --> 00:42:47.879 to move 00:42:47.879 --> 00:42:48.179 forward. 00:42:48.179 --> 00:42:48.279 God, 00:42:49.279 --> 00:42:51.839 we will 00:42:51.839 --> 00:42:52.639 be unable 00:42:52.639 --> 00:42:53.099 to help 00:42:53.099 --> 00:42:53.480 you if 00:42:53.480 --> 00:42:53.819 we don't 00:42:53.819 --> 00:42:54.139 know. 00:42:55.859 --> 00:42:56.599 We want 00:42:56.599 --> 00:42:56.940 to know. 00:43:02.419 --> 00:43:02.940 Wives, 00:43:03.539 --> 00:43:03.779 your 00:43:03.779 --> 00:43:04.239 relationship 00:43:04.239 --> 00:43:04.899 to Christ 00:43:04.899 --> 00:43:05.639 informs and 00:43:05.639 --> 00:43:06.159 directs your 00:43:06.159 --> 00:43:07.139 relationship to 00:43:07.139 --> 00:43:07.759 your husband. 00:43:09.679 --> 00:43:10.500 Next week, 00:43:10.980 --> 00:43:11.639 we're going 00:43:11.639 --> 00:43:12.079 to look at 00:43:12.079 --> 00:43:12.980 God's call 00:43:12.980 --> 00:43:14.400 on husbands. 00:43:15.519 --> 00:43:16.179 It's a 00:43:16.179 --> 00:43:17.840 call to 00:43:17.840 --> 00:43:18.159 die. 00:43:19.599 --> 00:43:20.000 Let's pray. 00:43:33.440 --> 00:43:34.000 Jesus, 00:43:34.139 --> 00:43:34.679 I am so 00:43:34.679 --> 00:43:35.219 aware that 00:43:35.219 --> 00:43:35.940 there are 00:43:35.940 --> 00:43:37.539 potholes all 00:43:37.539 --> 00:43:37.860 over the 00:43:37.860 --> 00:43:38.360 place with 00:43:38.360 --> 00:43:38.639 this. 00:43:40.460 --> 00:43:41.000 God, 00:43:41.099 --> 00:43:41.699 would you 00:43:41.699 --> 00:43:43.859 bring the 00:43:43.859 --> 00:43:44.879 truth of 00:43:44.879 --> 00:43:45.399 your word 00:43:45.399 --> 00:43:45.899 to bear 00:43:45.899 --> 00:43:46.339 in our 00:43:46.339 --> 00:43:47.119 hearts as 00:43:47.119 --> 00:43:47.559 you see 00:43:47.559 --> 00:43:47.899 fit. 00:43:49.079 --> 00:43:49.539 God, 00:43:49.579 --> 00:43:49.779 would you 00:43:49.779 --> 00:43:50.359 pray for 00:43:50.359 --> 00:43:51.919 sisters who 00:43:51.919 --> 00:43:52.539 need help. 00:43:53.099 --> 00:43:53.359 God, 00:43:53.419 --> 00:43:53.879 bring them 00:43:53.879 --> 00:43:54.179 help. 00:43:55.859 --> 00:43:56.099 God, 00:43:56.139 --> 00:43:56.399 thank you 00:43:56.399 --> 00:43:56.699 for your 00:43:56.699 --> 00:43:56.980 word. 00:43:57.879 --> 00:43:58.259 Thank you, 00:43:58.339 --> 00:43:58.460 God, 00:43:58.480 --> 00:43:58.819 that you 00:43:58.819 --> 00:43:59.980 speak right 00:43:59.980 --> 00:44:01.079 into our 00:44:01.079 --> 00:44:01.619 lives. 00:44:02.539 --> 00:44:03.139 In Jesus' 00:44:03.339 --> 00:44:03.559 name, 00:44:04.239 --> 00:44:04.539 amen.