So we're continuing our study of the Lord's Prayer this week, which is a prayer that Jesus taught His disciples, and then through them, we've received this prayer.
And the reason that Jesus teaches us this prayer is not just to teach us how to pray, although it's helpful for that.
It's really to teach us how to live.
It's to show us how to live in this world, and to have a relationship with the God who made this world, and to belong to Him as children belong to a Father.
And so that's what we've been looking at, and normally I like to take a couple of minutes at the beginning of a sermon and show the relevance for any particular passage and why people should care about understanding it.
But I don't really think I need to do that this week, because we come to the petition that I consider to be the most challenging one of all, which is the petition,
Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And I don't know a single person who doesn't have some area of their life, some relationship, where forgiveness is necessary.
For some of us, it may be a parent.
For some of us, it may be somebody from our childhood, or a teacher, or a coach.
Maybe it's somebody from your job, like a boss, or a co-worker.
Maybe it's a friend, or a roommate, or a spouse.
Maybe it's a friend, or a spouse, or a spouse, or a spouse, or a spouse.
Whatever the case may be, I don't know a single person who doesn't have some area where forgiveness is needed.
And if we're really honest, I think most of us not only have areas where we need to extend forgiveness,
but we also have things about our lives that require forgiveness.
And so I think this is relevant for every single one of us.
And so to understand more about this petition and about forgiveness,
we're going to look at one of the central go-to passages on forgiveness, which is Matthew chapter 18,
and this encounter between Peter and Jesus, and the parable that Jesus tells.
And we're going to see two things about forgiveness.
We're going to see, first, why we need it.
Why we need it.
And then, second, we're going to see how to do it.
So let's pray, and then we'll open God's Word together.
Lord, we thank You for Your Word.
And we thank You for Your promise and Your ability to do Your work through Your Word.
And Lord, we all, when it comes to something like this, we all need You to do Your work in our hearts.
And so I pray that You would do that through Your Word.
And I pray that this would not only happen for our betterment, for our good,
but ultimately for Your glory.
And it's for Your glory, and in the name of Your Son, that we pray.
Amen.
So first of all, why do we need forgiveness?
Why does the world need forgiveness?
In verse 21 and 22 of this passage, Peter comes to Jesus with a question.
And this is in the middle of a place in Matthew where Jesus has been teaching about kingdom people,
about the new community of the kingdom of God and how it's turning the world upside down.
And so He's been teaching about what life looks like in this community
and how it's different from the surrounding world.
And He's been talking about forgiveness and restoration in the community.
And so Peter comes up to Jesus and he says,
Lord, how often will my brother sin against me and I forgive him?
As many as seven times?
And what you need to understand is in the rabbinic tradition,
the traditional understanding was that you could forgive somebody up to three times,
and that was evidence of a generous heart.
But if you continued forgiving people, they might take advantage of you,
and it might be indicative of the fact that they weren't really sorry to begin with.
And so for Peter to say seven times is extravagant.
It's over the top.
So of course, Jesus' response surprises him.
Jesus says,
I do not say to you seven times, but 77 times.
Now, this translation that I'm using, the ESV, says 77.
Your translation at home may say 70 times 7,
and that's because the same Greek phrase can be translated either way.
So both are correct.
But the point is the same regardless of your translation.
Jesus is saying, on one level, the number doesn't matter.
Forgive as often as it takes.
Now that alone is worth noting.
But there's a lot more going on here behind Jesus' words.
The Greek phrase that we translate either 77 or 70 times 7
also shows up in the Greek version of the Old Testament in Genesis chapter 4.
Now, if you know anything about Genesis chapter 4,
this is the kind of origin story of human civilization.
This is where we began to see the trajectory,
the way things are going to play out
now that the relationship between God and human beings has been broken.
And we meet a man named Lamech,
who, by the way, is the first in Scripture to decide to take two wives instead of just one.
And that's a separate sermon, but it's worth noting.
And then Lamech says this to his wives.
He says,
You wives of Lamech, listen to what I say.
I've killed a man for wounding me,
a young man for striking me.
And it seems as though he's been in some kind of altercation,
and because of some either physical slap or insult,
he has responded by killing this man.
And then he goes on to say this.
This is kind of a vow that he makes.
If Cain's revenge is sevenfold,
then Lamech's is 77-fold.
The same phrase.
This is the beginning of the way of retribution.
This is the beginning of a cycle of retribution
that is going to spread and multiply and cover the face of the earth.
This is where retribution gets written into the DNA of the world.
And so this is the origin of tribalism and animosity and division and resentment and revenge.
This is the origin of eye for an eye justice.
This is where we begin to see the seeds of karma, karmic justice,
where they begin to root down into human society.
And so history is filled with cycles of retribution
that play out endlessly, generation after generation.
We see tribes killing other tribes.
We see cycles of revenge killings
that in some parts of the world have resulted in the near extinction of entire people groups.
We see nations warring against nations.
And even when wars end and peace treaties are signed,
often those peace treaties are based on the guilt of one offending party.
And so that accusation of guilt then plants seeds of resentment
that then lay the groundwork for future wars.
And this is much of our history.
But this can also happen not just at a national level,
but of course it can happen in our interpersonal relationships.
It can happen between friends and in marriages and in families
and between roommates, between siblings.
People can have experiences of being insulted or feeling slighted
or feeling disregarded or feeling hurt,
and then those turn into grudges,
and then we nurse those grudges,
and then those grudges are transformed into seething cauldrons of resentment.
There are many marriages out there that seem peaceful,
but that peace is more like a ceasefire.
It's a thin veneer of peace,
a kind of thin crust that is sitting on top of a deep pool of magma,
just waiting to erupt.
You know, in the HBO show Big Little Lies,
one of the main characters is Madeline.
And one of my favorite quotes from her is she says,
I love my grudges.
I tend to them like little pets.
And you know, I think it's funny partly because of her character,
but also partly because many of us are like that.
We sort of love to nurse our grudges and tend to them.
There's something that feels kind of good and satisfying about that.
But what this means is that these grudges,
this sort of sin, this guilt, this blame, this revenge,
it compounds upon itself.
It builds one generation to the next.
And so this little snowball
that begins with Adam and Eve and Cain and Abel and Lamech,
this little snowball turns into an avalanche.
And this great avalanche of retribution and guilt
is now crashing down through history,
doing damage to everything it touches.
And this avalanche and this cycle of retribution
and the guilt and the brokenness,
this means that our society is deeply divided.
There are deep cracks and fissures in our society.
One of the prime examples of this for our society
is the example of race.
Just this week, new footage of Ahmaud Arbery's murder
was released.
And what we see is that there was a struggle
that ensued after two white men
identified Arbery running down the street.
He was out for a jog.
And they identified him
and thought he looked like a burglary suspect.
And so they get in their truck,
they chase him down.
And then in the struggle that ensues,
because those two white men are armed,
Ahmaud Arbery is shot and killed
and dies on the street.
And then we see a report that came out
about DC and coronavirus this week,
where we learned that even though 47%
of people who test positive are black,
that 80% of the people who are dying
from COVID-19 are black.
Now, these realities are exposing
painful realities about our society.
The vast difference between being white
and being black in our country.
Truths like this emerge,
and we can't ignore that there's a massive difference
between being white in America and being black.
It's like we have two countries.
And there's this chasm that exists in our society,
these two alternate realities almost.
And that chasm exists because of centuries
of systemic injustice and racism
and poverty and ignorance.
It's even been written into our policies.
But because of this,
the resentment and the anger that this causes
is justified.
The desire for retribution is justified
because these are real realities.
The injustice is real.
And yet, all of this only serves
to deepen the divide.
The cracks are getting wider and deeper.
So there's this massive avalanche
of retribution and guilt
that is crashing down through history.
And listen to this.
Like any avalanche,
like any avalanche,
it has become such a tangled mass of destruction
that it's almost impossible
to clearly separate victim from perpetrator.
Right?
In an avalanche,
trees that were uprooted,
that were torn out further upslope,
are transformed into weapons of destruction
further down the slope.
And you see the same thing happening
with people in history.
History shows us that today's victims
can become tomorrow's perpetrators.
Shows us that today's liberators
can become tomorrow's tyrants.
And so we are all implicated.
No one is free from this.
No one has the luxury
of stepping outside of it
and analyzing it
from a position of moral neutrality.
And this avalanche of retribution
will not stop
until it destroys everything
and everyone.
All from these words
that we hear Lamech utter
so long ago.
All from the sin
that entered the world
when our relationship with God
was broken.
Our only hope
is to interrupt the cycle.
Right?
Our only hope
is to stop the avalanche
and if we can,
to reverse it.
So here's the point of all this.
When Jesus says to Peter,
I do not say to you seven times,
but 77 times,
he is deliberately reversing
Lamech's words.
He is deliberately reversing
the way of retribution.
The way of retribution says
vengeance.
Vengeance seven times over.
Vengeance 77 times over.
Vengeance 70 times seven times over.
As much as it takes
until the world is destroyed.
But Jesus is saying
there's another way.
This is the place
where he's teaching
about the kingdom of God.
And the kingdom of God
is turning the world upside down.
It is undoing
and reversing
the wrong
that has entered the world.
It's a reversal
of what it means to be human.
It's turning everything
on its head.
And Jesus says
there's another way.
There's a way to interrupt
the cycle of retribution
and revenge
and guilt.
It's the way of forgiveness.
Right?
Forgive.
Forgive seven times.
Forgive 77 times.
Forgive 70 times seven times.
Forgive as much as it takes
until the world
is made whole.
So why
is forgiveness
important?
And why do we need it?
It's because forgiveness
is the way that God
is making this world
whole again.
Forgiveness sits
at the very heart
of God's plan
to renew this world
and us.
So that's why we need it.
But how do we do it?
How do we do it?
In Matthew 18
when Peter asks
this question of Jesus
about forgiveness
Jesus responds
by telling him a parable.
And in the parable
a king is settling
his accounts
and a man is brought
to him who owes him
10,000 talents.
And you need to understand
that this is an astronomical
ridiculous
ludicrous sum.
It's like saying
that he owes
hundreds of billions
of dollars.
It's unimaginable sum.
And the man can't pay.
And so the king
is going to respond
with retribution.
He's going to sell
this man and his family
into slavery
which was commonly
a way to punish debtors.
It was an act of retribution.
And this man begs for mercy.
And he promises
to pay the debt back
but it's such a large sum
that that's impossible.
But the king
has compassion on this man
and he shows him pity.
And of all things
this king
cancels the debt
which means the king
has to absorb
the cost himself.
He has to absorb
the cost of hundreds
of billions of dollars
but he cancels
the debt entirely
and he releases this man
and lets him go free.
But then this man
goes out
the same servant
and he immediately
runs into a man
who owes him money.
And this man owes him
a much smaller amount.
It's a paltry sum.
It's worth about
three or four thousand dollars.
But the servant
chokes this man
and he demands payment.
And this man
says the same thing.
He begs for mercy.
Promises to pay it back.
But the servant
refuses to show mercy
and he throws him in prison.
And then the king
hears of this.
He calls the servant back
and then he throws
the servant in jail
until he can pay
the debt in full.
So this shows us
a number of things
about forgiveness.
And first of all
it simply shows us
what forgiveness is.
What it looks like.
And in short
I would say this.
Forgiveness means
giving up
the right to retribution.
Forgiveness means
giving up
the right to retribution.
Even if it's justified.
So it means
maybe
giving up your right
to expect repayment
of a debt.
Could be financial repayment
like this parable
or in much
more commonly
I think this could
refer to
emotional repayment
in the form of revenge.
But forgiveness means
giving up that right
even if we're justified.
The Greek word
literally means
to let someone go
which is exactly
what the king does
to this servant.
And in order
to forgive somebody
that requires
sort of three parts.
There are three parts
to forgiveness
at least.
And we see these
play out in this parable.
The first thing
that you have to do is
if you're going to
forgive somebody
you have to
name the debt.
You have to
honestly and thoroughly
name the debt.
Now this could be
a monetary amount
like in the parable
10,000 talents.
But much more often
this means
naming the hurt
or naming the wrong.
You have to name it.
It has to be stated
and acknowledged.
And this also means
that we have to be able
to honestly voice
our emotions
and the pain
that has been caused.
So forgiving somebody
does not mean
minimizing the wrong.
It doesn't mean
downplaying it.
It doesn't mean
being conflict avoided
and saying
oh it's no big deal
it doesn't matter.
If you do that
you're laying
the groundwork
for resentment
down the road.
nor does forgiveness
mean that we
condone injustice
or overlook
the need
for justice.
We can forgive
somebody in our heart
but justice
may still need
to be done.
Justice may still
need to be carried out
especially if somebody
has committed a crime.
We can forgive
and still long
for justice.
And when it comes
to an issue like
race in our country
yes we need forgiveness
but we also need justice
and we should fight
for justice.
And the two can coexist.
Forgiveness and justice
can coexist.
But the first part
of forgiveness
is simply naming
honestly the wrong
or the debt
that's been incurred.
The second thing
we need to do
is we need to decide
we need to choose
to cancel the debt.
To cancel the debt.
Which means
we choose
to absorb
the loss
ourselves.
What this means
is you decide
in your heart
from now on
I am giving up
my right
to demand repayment.
I'm giving up
my desire
to seek revenge.
I'm giving up
my desire
to see harm
done to this person.
I'm giving up
any tendency
I have
to wish ill
of this person
which means
when those temptations
arise
you don't give in to them.
You're giving
all of that up.
I release this person
from their debt.
I set this person
free in my heart.
Now this doesn't mean
automatically
that you reconcile
with that person.
Forgiveness is something
that you can do
on your own.
Reconciliation is a
two-way street.
Reconciliation requires
both people
working to rebuild
trust in a relationship
and that can take
a long time
and sometimes
it's not possible.
Nor does this mean
allowing someone
to continue hurting you.
If you're in a situation
where abuse is happening
or you're being
repeatedly harmed
and somebody is
repeatedly sinning
against you
it is possible
for you to forgive
that person
but also set
whatever boundaries
you need to set
in place
to make sure
that person
can't keep hurting you.
But what matters
is that you
cancel the debt
in your heart.
And then the last thing
the last thing
that you once
you've made
that choice
is you commit
to forgiveness
for as long
as it takes.
You commit
to forgiveness
for as long
as it takes.
Seventy times
seven or more
if that's what
it takes.
because if you've
ever forgiven
anyone
for really
causing you harm
then you know
that it's not
a one time choice.
It's a choice
that you have to make
again and again
and again
because that hurt
and that pain
and that resentment
will resurface
again and again
and again
and what this means
is that you choose
every single time
to cancel the debt.
You commit to it
as a posture.
I have pain
in my life.
I have ways
that I've been wronged
and I know
I know that pain
is going to be there
for the rest of my life
and so what this means
for me is that
sometimes every single day
I have to wake up
and I have to choose
to forgive
once more.
Committing yourself
to forgiveness
means making that choice
even when you don't want to
and for this reason
forgiveness may be
one of the hardest things
you ever have to do
in your life.
For many of us
it is.
Which of course
begs the question
why do it at all?
Why do it at all?
You know
much has been said
mainly by Christians
about all of the
psychological benefits
of forgiveness
and all of the
spiritual benefits
of forgiveness
and how it sets us free
and you know
some of that's true
but in my experience
forgiveness is
often extremely painful
and I don't often
feel free
when I'm doing
the hard work
of forgiveness.
It's interesting to note
that while some of that
is true
while there are many
benefits to forgiveness
it's interesting to note
that Jesus doesn't
say any of that
in Matthew chapter 18
nor does he mention
any of the benefits
of forgiveness
in the Lord's Prayer.
According to Jesus
the reason that Christians
forgive is simply this
we have been forgiven.
we've been forgiven.
That's the reason.
All of that avalanche
of retribution
and blame
and pain
crashing down
through history
it all started
as this tremor
when our ancestors
turned their backs
on God
but it has compounded
over the millennia
down to us
and we were born
into it.
We were born
into the guilt.
We were born
into the brokenness.
We were born
into the chaos.
And the great moral debt
of that rebellion
and all of the damage
that this avalanche
has done
that sits on our shoulders
and by comparison
10,000 talents
is a paltry sum
and all of that
sits on our shoulders
and it crushes us
and the thing
that we need to understand
is God has every right
to demand retribution.
God has every right
to demand retribution
and yet the core truth
of Scripture
running from Genesis
to Revelation
is that God
chooses to forgive.
He chooses to forgive
which means
as we said before
that God chooses
to absorb that debt
into Himself
and that's exactly
what we see on the cross.
On the cross of Christ
we see that entire avalanche
of human sin
and retribution
and guilt
and blame.
it all comes crashing down
on Jesus
and Jesus takes
all of that
on Himself
and so the ultimate
consequences
of human evil
and rebellion
and sin
the ultimate consequences
fall on Him
instead of us.
He takes our place.
Many religions
many philosophies
extol the value
of forgiveness
and talk about
the importance
of forgiveness
in our society.
Only Christianity
says that God
was willing to bear
the cost of forgiveness
in order to set
humanity free.
Only Christianity
says that.
Which means
God stands ready
here and now
to extend that forgiveness
to anyone who asks.
No matter what you've done
no matter where you've come from
no matter what you've done
even today
God stands ready
to extend that forgiveness
because He's absorbed the debt.
It's been paid in full.
And those who come to Him
and those who are set free
from that debt
they are given
a new life.
They're given
a new way
of being human
in the world.
They become free
women and men
and they have
an entirely new
range of possibilities
in front of them.
Which means
they are free
to break
the cycle
of retribution.
They can choose
to forgive
instead
because they've been forgiven.
And that's really
the point of this parable.
The point of this parable
is not
that God's forgiveness
is conditional
on our forgiveness
of other people.
That would run against
the entire witness
of Scripture.
The point of this parable
is that God's forgiveness
is what makes possible
our forgiveness
of other people
in our lives.
It's what makes it possible.
The scholar N.T. Wright
puts it like this.
He says,
you know,
forgiveness is a lot
like the air
in your lungs.
There's only room
for you to inhale
the next lungful
when you've just
breathed out
the previous one.
And he says,
so if you hold it in,
if you hold the forgiveness in
and you refuse
to exhale it
into the life
of someone who needs it,
you won't be able
to take any more
in yourself.
And if you do that,
if you hold it in,
then you will
very quickly suffocate.
And so he says,
no sooner do we
take God's forgiveness
into ourselves,
then we exhale it,
we breathe it out
into the life
of someone else
who needs it.
And you know,
that's honestly
been my experience.
Every day,
making that painful
choice to forgive,
breathing in
God's forgiveness
of me
and then breathing
it out
into someone's life
who needs it from me.
Breathing in
God's forgiveness
and breathing it out
into the world.
And as we do that,
we are breathing
life into the world.
We're breathing
hope into the world.
We're breathing
love into the world.
We're breathing
renewal into the world
one act of forgiveness
at a time.
Now there's one
final piece of this
that I want to emphasize.
That if you want
to be a kingdom person,
if you want to be
a part of making
the world whole again,
if you want to be
a part of breathing
life into the society
around you,
one act of forgiveness
at a time,
if you want to break
this cycle of retribution,
this is not something
that you can do alone.
It's not something
that you can do alone.
When you see
these extraordinary
acts of forgiveness,
I'm thinking of
the Amish
at Nickel Mines
after a shooter
entered a schoolhouse
and killed
five young girls
before killing himself.
I'm thinking of
the people
of the Charleston
AME Church
that also experienced
a violent shooting
and the deaths
of many of their loved ones.
I'm thinking about
times like this
when a horrible tragedy occurs,
when a random act
of violence occurs,
and then the community
responds
with an almost
inexplicable
act of forgiveness.
In both cases,
the community
forgave the shooter,
forgave the families
of the shooter,
and in some cases
surrounded the families
of the shooter.
At the funeral
for the shooter
for the Amish
at Nickel Mines,
over half of the people
who were present
at his funeral
were from the Amish community.
And that response
is breathtaking
and beautiful
and amazing.
And when interviewers
ask these people,
interviewers go in
and say,
how could you forgive?
How is something
like this possible?
And in both cases,
the people interviewed
talked about
Matthew chapter 18.
And they talked
about the Lord's Prayer,
which is something
that they had prayed
so often
that it had simply
become a part of them.
It was hardwired
into their DNA.
But the other point
I want to make
is this.
In both cases,
these are people
who were rooted
and formed
in a culture
of forgiveness.
A culture
of forgiveness.
They were in communities,
communities
of forgiveness.
You know,
three sociologists
actually wrote a book
about the Amish
at Nickel Mines
called
Amish Grace.
And, you know,
I heard Tim Keller
make this point
in a talk he made
gave to the House of Lords.
But they wrote this book
about the Amish
act of forgiveness
in Nickel Mines.
And they basically
say in that book
that this act
of forgiveness
was not the product
of American culture.
See, a lot of media
at the time,
a lot of people
were saying,
this is America
at our best.
This is just shows
what America can do.
We forgive the killer.
But they make the point
this is not
an outgrowth
of American culture.
He says,
this is the product
of a subculture
that is deeply rooted
in the truth
that God suffered
and died
in order to forgive
His people.
And the humility
and the self-denial
and the gentleness
and the kindness
and the love
that comes out
of that reality,
that that is what
produced this extraordinary
act of forgiveness.
You know,
the American culture
of consumerism
and expressive individualism,
that doesn't produce
people who forgive.
That doesn't form
people for that.
What it forms
is people who are
full of outrage
and moral indignation
and accusation.
So if you want
to become part
of this movement
of grace,
if you want
to be a kingdom person
and end the cycle
of retribution
and make the world whole,
it starts
with your prayer life.
It starts
with praying
the Lord's Prayer
and prayers like it
and praying it so much,
praying it so often
that it replaces
that DNA of retribution,
that it begins
to rewrite your DNA
so that forgiveness
becomes more
and more
a gut instinct.
And then even
more than that,
it means finding
a church community
that is committed
to forgiveness
and reconciliation
and then diving
into that community
and becoming
such a part of it,
so deeply intertwined
in that community
that it forms you.
It forms your heart,
it forms your mind,
it forms your imagination,
and it forms your sense
of what's possible.
Let's pray.
Lord, we thank you again
and we know
that forgiveness
is not something
that can be sourced
in us,
that the point
of this is very clear,
that forgiveness
is something
that we need
to receive from you
before we can
extend it to others.
And so I pray
for all of us here
listening who need forgiveness,
I pray that right now
they would turn
their hearts to you
and ask for that forgiveness
and that you would
grant it, Lord,
because we know
that you're a God
whose eternal nature
is always to have mercy.
And then, Lord,
we pray for those
difficult relationships,
those pain points,
those areas of struggle
where we need to forgive.
I pray that you would
give us your divine strength
to do just that,
even if it means
breathing it in and out
one breath at a time
and one act of forgiveness
at a time.
And we pray this
not only for our good,
not only that our world
might become whole one day,
but we pray it
for your glory, Lord,
because you're the source
and the center of all.
Amen.
Jesus, what a friend for sinners,
Jesus, love of my soul,
friends may...