WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 Honor your father and mother. 00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.000 That's a great commandment. 00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:11.000 It's always exciting to see all the parents smile when you mention that commandment. 00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:14.000 Actually, I'm willing to bet all my money, which is not very much, 00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:19.000 that at any given point in church history when this sermon was preached, 00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:24.000 there was at least one parent who looked to the side and said to his child, 00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 you should listen, you know? 00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:31.000 Okay, so the fifth commandment, the fifth word of God, 00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:37.000 as you will have realized, we're almost halfway through or serious on the 10 commandments. 00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:40.000 So let's talk a little bit about where we are. 00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:43.000 Honor your father and your mother. 00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:47.000 Actually, I think every time I say it, I think, 00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:51.000 my mother, if she's watching the live stream, she will be delighted 00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:55.000 that I have to talk about this commandment. 00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:59.000 So let's dive right in, the fifth word. 00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:06.000 Just so you are aware, we will be talking about the commandment in its biblical context, 00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 in its ancient context. 00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 We will talk about what it means to honor our parents, why it's important, 00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.000 and finally, how we can do it. 00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:19.000 What I won't say or what I won't be talking about is, 00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:24.000 this commandment can be understood in a bigger sense. 00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:29.000 The Westminster Large Aceticism talks about that honor your father and mother. 00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:32.000 It does not just apply to your father and mother, 00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:37.000 it also applies to any authorities, to those who are worthy of honor. 00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:42.000 I won't dive into that tonight, because we could talk about that for hours and hours, 00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:44.000 but I won't. 00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 You can be relaxed. 00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:50.000 So let's talk about where we find the fifth word. 00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:55.000 First of all, the fifth word is halfway through the commandment. 00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:56.000 We've got ten commandments. 00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:03.000 The fifth commandment is halfway through, as your maths will allow you to understand. 00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:08.000 Usually we say that ten commandments can be divided in two parts. 00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 We've got commandments that talk about us and our relationship to God. 00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:16.000 You can say vertical commandments, and we've got commandments that talk about us 00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.000 and relationship to our neighbors, right? 00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:19.000 Horizontal commandments. 00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:26.000 Some people actually think that the two tablets of stone that the commandments were written on, 00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:29.000 they might have been that distinction, you know? 00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:32.000 One tablet of stone talked about the first four commandments, 00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:35.000 and then the other tablet about the other six commandments. 00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:38.000 You can also use your hands to memorize them. 00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:40.000 Maybe, I don't know. 00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:44.000 It's four and six, so maybe that's not a good mnemonic. 00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:47.000 It's up to you if you want to use that or not. 00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:52.000 So we've got commandments that talk about us loving God, 00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:58.000 and we've got commandments talking about us loving our neighbors, right? 00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:01.000 And that's the distinction Jesus gives us as well in the New Testament. 00:03:01.000 --> 00:03:05.000 Love the Lord your God with all your heart, will, mind, and soul, 00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:08.000 and love your neighbor as yourself. 00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:11.000 Now, the fifth commandment is interesting, 00:03:11.000 --> 00:03:16.000 because it actually functions a little bit like a bridge between those categories. 00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:20.000 What I mean by that is your parents are not God, obviously, 00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:25.000 although sometimes they like to think that when they tell you what to do. 00:03:25.000 --> 00:03:29.000 But at the same time, your parents, they're not just your normal neighbors. 00:03:29.000 --> 00:03:32.000 They're not just your friends, your pals, or strangers on the street. 00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:34.000 Your parents are your parents. 00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:38.000 They fall into their own category if we think about it. 00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:45.000 And that's especially true for the time and context the commandment was given in. 00:03:45.000 --> 00:03:49.000 The ancient Israelites, they had a very different approach to family. 00:03:49.000 --> 00:03:52.000 There was a very clear hierarchy there. 00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:58.000 The father and mother were at the top, and that level of authority was just given. 00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:02.000 In our society, we don't care about our parents very much anymore. 00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:04.000 I mean, you can do that exercise. 00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:10.000 If I had to give ten commandments, would I reserve one commandment for father and mother, 00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:12.000 to honor a father and mother? 00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:15.000 Probably, a lot of us wouldn't do that. 00:04:15.000 --> 00:04:17.000 But God says it's important. 00:04:17.000 --> 00:04:19.000 We've got to talk about it. 00:04:19.000 --> 00:04:21.000 And the Israelites, they knew that. 00:04:21.000 --> 00:04:23.000 Why did they know that? 00:04:23.000 --> 00:04:29.000 Well, in Genesis, God creates the earth, the heavens, and He creates people. 00:04:29.000 --> 00:04:33.000 Now, your parents also kind of create you, right? 00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:37.000 If I was to ask you who created you, was it God or was it your parents? 00:04:37.000 --> 00:04:39.000 We couldn't say either or. 00:04:39.000 --> 00:04:42.000 We have to say, yes, it was God, but yes, also our parents. 00:04:42.000 --> 00:04:44.000 They're kind of involved in that. 00:04:44.000 --> 00:04:49.000 Biology and divine creation play a part in this, both of it. 00:04:49.000 --> 00:04:53.000 And that's why your parents have a special relationship with you. 00:04:53.000 --> 00:04:55.000 You have their genetics ingrained in you. 00:04:55.000 --> 00:04:58.000 You are their flesh and blood, as it were. 00:04:58.000 --> 00:05:03.000 So the position of this commandment within the Ten Commandments is quite interesting, 00:05:03.000 --> 00:05:07.000 because parents are not God, but they're also not like your normal neighbors. 00:05:07.000 --> 00:05:10.000 There is a level of authority involved. 00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:13.000 A friend of mine actually told me, he's a bit older than me, I have to say. 00:05:13.000 --> 00:05:15.000 He could be my dad's age. 00:05:15.000 --> 00:05:18.000 But when he was a young lad, he told his father, 00:05:18.000 --> 00:05:22.000 respect is something that needs to be earned. 00:05:22.000 --> 00:05:26.000 Maybe we would generally agree with that statement. 00:05:26.000 --> 00:05:30.000 But it is a bit odd to hear that, because he would say that to his father. 00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:36.000 Well, now he's grown up and he realized that it was a bit foolish to say that. 00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:39.000 Because it's different with our parents. 00:05:39.000 --> 00:05:44.000 They participated in your creation, and without them you wouldn't be here. 00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:50.000 And I know that some of us here tonight actually didn't have good parents, 00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:52.000 and we will talk about that in a little while, 00:05:52.000 --> 00:05:59.000 but generally spoken, parents have a level of authority over their child. 00:05:59.000 --> 00:06:00.000 So what does it mean then? 00:06:00.000 --> 00:06:03.000 What does it mean to honor our parents? 00:06:03.000 --> 00:06:06.000 If you were here last week and you listened to Corey Sermon, 00:06:06.000 --> 00:06:10.000 you know that this is one of the two positive commandments. 00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:13.000 So last week we talked about the Sabbath. 00:06:13.000 --> 00:06:15.000 Keep the Sabbath. 00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:18.000 This week we talked about honor your parents. 00:06:18.000 --> 00:06:19.000 Honor your parents. 00:06:19.000 --> 00:06:21.000 It's not a you shall not. 00:06:21.000 --> 00:06:23.000 It's nothing that's forbidding. 00:06:23.000 --> 00:06:26.000 It's something that's commanded, which tells us something. 00:06:26.000 --> 00:06:32.000 Usually the commandments forbid something that we naturally desire to do. 00:06:32.000 --> 00:06:37.000 This one wants us to do something that we naturally struggle to do. 00:06:37.000 --> 00:06:41.000 Children don't usually wake up in the morning and say to their parents, 00:06:41.000 --> 00:06:46.000 Mom and Dad, I have tidied my room, emptied the bins, cleaned the whole kitchen, 00:06:46.000 --> 00:06:50.000 just because I wanted to show you that I love you and respect you. 00:06:50.000 --> 00:06:52.000 Well, I did that as a child actually. 00:06:52.000 --> 00:06:54.000 It's quite obvious. 00:06:54.000 --> 00:06:57.000 No, all jokes aside, I didn't do that as a child. 00:06:57.000 --> 00:07:00.000 And if your child does that, congratulations. 00:07:00.000 --> 00:07:03.000 But usually that's not what happens, right? 00:07:03.000 --> 00:07:07.000 We struggle with this and this commandment addresses all of us. 00:07:07.000 --> 00:07:09.000 All of us have parents. 00:07:09.000 --> 00:07:14.000 And as I said, there is some special circumstances, which we will talk about later. 00:07:14.000 --> 00:07:17.000 But in general, everyone has parents. 00:07:17.000 --> 00:07:21.000 So what does it mean then to honor our parents? 00:07:21.000 --> 00:07:24.000 Let's do a little word study. 00:07:24.000 --> 00:07:29.000 In seminary, you're actually told you should never mention Hebrew or Greek 00:07:29.000 --> 00:07:32.000 when you're preaching, but I don't care about that. 00:07:32.000 --> 00:07:34.000 So let's do that. 00:07:34.000 --> 00:07:41.000 The Hebrew word that is used here to describe to honor is very interesting. 00:07:41.000 --> 00:07:45.000 When we think about what honoring means, people will often say, 00:07:45.000 --> 00:07:48.000 to honor your parents means to do what they say. 00:07:48.000 --> 00:07:50.000 It means to obey. 00:07:50.000 --> 00:07:53.000 And we read Ephesians 6 where Paul says, 00:07:53.000 --> 00:07:56.000 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 00:07:56.000 --> 00:07:59.000 And that's great. So obeying is part of it. 00:07:59.000 --> 00:08:03.000 And then he continues, honor your father and mother. 00:08:03.000 --> 00:08:07.000 This is the first commandment with a promise that it may go well with you 00:08:07.000 --> 00:08:09.000 and that you may live long in the land. 00:08:09.000 --> 00:08:14.000 So Paul says obeying is part of it, but he doesn't stop there. 00:08:14.000 --> 00:08:18.000 It's not quite enough, you know, because the Hebrew word, Kavit, 00:08:18.000 --> 00:08:22.000 which he has translated as to honor, 00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:26.000 it bears this meaning of heaviness, weightiness. 00:08:26.000 --> 00:08:32.000 There's something connected to this word that's just really heavy. 00:08:32.000 --> 00:08:36.000 It actually is used in negative context as well, 00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:39.000 like heavy labor for the Israelites. 00:08:39.000 --> 00:08:45.000 Or it's used in context with the Pharaoh and his heart was hardened. 00:08:45.000 --> 00:08:47.000 His heart was heavy. 00:08:47.000 --> 00:08:51.000 But here it's used in a very positive sense. 00:08:51.000 --> 00:08:54.000 It means something like honoring. 00:08:54.000 --> 00:08:58.000 And the Bible usually uses this word in its positive sense 00:08:58.000 --> 00:09:00.000 in connection with God. 00:09:00.000 --> 00:09:05.000 It's used to describe our response and our attitude towards God. 00:09:05.000 --> 00:09:10.000 It's actually a word of worship to honor or to glorify. 00:09:10.000 --> 00:09:17.000 And the Psalms over and over again, you'll find this, glorify Yahweh, glorify the Lord. 00:09:17.000 --> 00:09:23.000 So it seems in a way that father and mother here are associated with God. 00:09:23.000 --> 00:09:25.000 So what's that mean? 00:09:25.000 --> 00:09:27.000 Shall we pray to our father and mother? 00:09:27.000 --> 00:09:29.000 Obviously not. 00:09:29.000 --> 00:09:31.000 Shall we worship them? 00:09:31.000 --> 00:09:33.000 No, of course not. 00:09:33.000 --> 00:09:35.000 Apparance are not God. 00:09:35.000 --> 00:09:40.000 But you see, God reveals in the 10 words his character. 00:09:40.000 --> 00:09:43.000 That's what the law, what the 10 words are all about. 00:09:43.000 --> 00:09:50.000 His character and his ideas so that we can become more like him. 00:09:50.000 --> 00:09:55.000 The role of the parents here is actually similar to the role of God 00:09:55.000 --> 00:09:59.000 because our parents participated in creating us. 00:09:59.000 --> 00:10:04.000 But also, and here's the difficult point for parents, 00:10:04.000 --> 00:10:06.000 if the children are to honor their parents, 00:10:06.000 --> 00:10:14.000 it presumes that God's intention for parents is to reflect his character to their children. 00:10:14.000 --> 00:10:16.000 And that's where it gets tricky. 00:10:16.000 --> 00:10:20.000 And that's where usually all the parents in the room stop smiling. 00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:27.000 Because we know that we, well, I'm not a parent, but I know that parents struggle as well. 00:10:27.000 --> 00:10:32.000 God wants parents to be merciful, to be good like he is. 00:10:32.000 --> 00:10:39.000 The premise here is that the children honor their parents as the parents reflect God's character. 00:10:39.000 --> 00:10:44.000 So this commandment is about obeying your parents, partly. 00:10:44.000 --> 00:10:47.000 But it's also about so much more than that. 00:10:47.000 --> 00:10:53.000 It's about our attitude toward people who have authority over us. 00:10:53.000 --> 00:10:58.000 The commandment reveals God's heart about what he intends families to be like. 00:10:58.000 --> 00:11:03.000 Obeying is not quite enough, it's part of it, but it goes further. 00:11:03.000 --> 00:11:10.000 The reason for that is that you can obey your parents and you can hate them at the same time. 00:11:10.000 --> 00:11:14.000 You can obey your parents and you can hate them at the same time, 00:11:14.000 --> 00:11:19.000 but you cannot honor your parents and hate them at the same time. 00:11:19.000 --> 00:11:21.000 You see what I'm saying here? 00:11:21.000 --> 00:11:25.000 I can do what my parents tell me, but I can hate them in my heart for it. 00:11:25.000 --> 00:11:31.000 But I cannot honor them, this posture, this attitude of honoring your parents, 00:11:31.000 --> 00:11:34.000 cannot be there and I can still hate them. 00:11:34.000 --> 00:11:38.000 That doesn't work, that's a paradox. 00:11:38.000 --> 00:11:43.000 You see, God gave this commandment to his son Israel. 00:11:43.000 --> 00:11:46.000 So the people of Israel, they were in covenant with God. 00:11:46.000 --> 00:11:51.000 So symbolically, the Bible describes it as God is the father of his people, 00:11:51.000 --> 00:11:54.000 of his son Israel, you could say. 00:11:54.000 --> 00:11:59.000 And he gave it so they would become more like him and honor him through that. 00:11:59.000 --> 00:12:01.000 So that's the big scale, right? 00:12:01.000 --> 00:12:06.000 And on the small scale, we can honor God by honoring our parents. 00:12:06.000 --> 00:12:13.000 Now, you and I know that it's impossible to be a good parent honoring child out of your own strength. 00:12:13.000 --> 00:12:22.000 And all parents in this room know that it's impossible to be a good God honoring Christ reflecting parent out of your own strength. 00:12:22.000 --> 00:12:25.000 And the solution here is not to just try harder. 00:12:25.000 --> 00:12:28.000 It's not just you have to be better. 00:12:28.000 --> 00:12:31.000 That's not what Christianity is all about. 00:12:31.000 --> 00:12:33.000 That's not what we are saying. 00:12:33.000 --> 00:12:35.000 What we need is grace. 00:12:35.000 --> 00:12:39.000 We need grace as parents and we need grace as children. 00:12:39.000 --> 00:12:42.000 And you know what? 00:12:42.000 --> 00:12:45.000 There's good news today. 00:12:45.000 --> 00:12:50.000 Some of you will have guessed it, but the 10 words, they're all about Jesus Christ. 00:12:50.000 --> 00:12:55.000 We can honor God in our parents and we can dishonor them. 00:12:55.000 --> 00:13:03.000 Jesus always honored his parents, his earthly parents, Mary and Joseph, but also his father in heaven. 00:13:03.000 --> 00:13:08.000 So in Luke 2, we read all about Jesus being born and we have one story. 00:13:08.000 --> 00:13:09.000 It's very interesting. 00:13:09.000 --> 00:13:18.000 There's not much about Jesus' childhood, but we have that one story where Jesus is in Jerusalem with his parents and they lose him. 00:13:18.000 --> 00:13:23.000 And they're actually on their way back home and they realize we don't know where Jesus is. 00:13:23.000 --> 00:13:30.000 So they turn around and they find Jesus sitting in the temple discussing theology with some scholars. 00:13:30.000 --> 00:13:36.000 And when his parents find Jesus, he says, didn't you know I must be in my father's house? 00:13:36.000 --> 00:13:40.000 And his parents, of course, don't really understand what he's saying. 00:13:40.000 --> 00:13:43.000 And then the Bible tells us something interesting. 00:13:43.000 --> 00:13:48.000 It says he went down with them and came to Nazareth and was obedient to them. 00:13:48.000 --> 00:13:53.000 You see, Jesus just went with his parents and was obedient to them and honored them. 00:13:53.000 --> 00:13:55.000 That's what the Bible says. 00:13:55.000 --> 00:14:00.000 If you're a parent tonight, you know that your children behave like they know better. 00:14:00.000 --> 00:14:04.000 Now, you have to understand Jesus actually knew better. 00:14:04.000 --> 00:14:12.000 It must have been in some ways pretty difficult to be Jesus' father or mother because he did know better. 00:14:12.000 --> 00:14:17.000 But he also honored his parents. He was obedient to them. 00:14:17.000 --> 00:14:25.000 And then we've got a story of Jesus at the end of his life where he's hanging on the cross and he's dying. 00:14:25.000 --> 00:14:29.000 And he tells John to take care of his mother, Mary. 00:14:29.000 --> 00:14:34.000 He honors his mother even in his last hour. 00:14:34.000 --> 00:14:40.000 And he also honors God, his heavenly father. 00:14:40.000 --> 00:14:46.000 He tells his parents, did you know I must be in my father's house? 00:14:46.000 --> 00:14:49.000 John 17, the high priestly prayer. 00:14:49.000 --> 00:14:58.000 Jesus prays to his father and says, I glorified you on earth having accomplished the work that you gave me to do. 00:14:58.000 --> 00:15:01.000 So Jesus was the perfect example. 00:15:01.000 --> 00:15:03.000 Always honored his father in heaven. 00:15:03.000 --> 00:15:06.000 Always honored his parents, his earthly parents. 00:15:06.000 --> 00:15:10.000 So should we try to be more like Jesus in this regard? 00:15:10.000 --> 00:15:11.000 Absolutely, yes. 00:15:11.000 --> 00:15:14.000 Will we fail to be like Jesus? 00:15:14.000 --> 00:15:15.000 Absolutely, yes. 00:15:15.000 --> 00:15:17.000 But here's the thing. 00:15:17.000 --> 00:15:20.000 Jesus is not only the example of our faith. 00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:25.000 We're not just to imitate Jesus and try better and try harder. 00:15:25.000 --> 00:15:26.000 Jesus is so much more than that. 00:15:26.000 --> 00:15:29.000 He's the object of a faith. 00:15:29.000 --> 00:15:33.000 Not just the example, but also the object of our faith. 00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:36.000 So what do I mean by that? 00:15:36.000 --> 00:15:41.000 I mean that we ought to become more like Jesus in the way we honor our parents. 00:15:41.000 --> 00:15:45.000 But without him and his Holy Spirit, we can't do it. 00:15:45.000 --> 00:15:54.000 See, we believe that Jesus takes away our sin and that the Holy Spirit enables us to do the things God asks of us. 00:15:54.000 --> 00:16:01.000 Only through our union with Christ can we actually be good sons and good daughters and good fathers and good mothers. 00:16:01.000 --> 00:16:11.000 Only through Jesus and by looking at what he has done for us at the cross can we become God honoring children and God honoring parents. 00:16:11.000 --> 00:16:19.000 You see, other religions like Islam, Judaism, they say similar things about honoring our parents. 00:16:19.000 --> 00:16:21.000 But the whole weight is on you to do it. 00:16:21.000 --> 00:16:23.000 You have to be a good parent. 00:16:23.000 --> 00:16:25.000 You have to be a good son. 00:16:25.000 --> 00:16:32.000 In Christ, we find the one who perfectly honored his father so that in him we can honor him too. 00:16:32.000 --> 00:16:34.000 We can honor God. 00:16:34.000 --> 00:16:40.000 We can honor our parents and by honoring our parents, we honor God. 00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:41.000 Why? 00:16:41.000 --> 00:16:44.000 Why do we have to do that? 00:16:44.000 --> 00:16:51.000 Well, maybe you sit here, you listen to my sermon and you're thinking to yourself, well, why would I do it? 00:16:51.000 --> 00:16:57.000 Well, first of all, as I said, your parents made you and second of all, God tells you to. 00:16:57.000 --> 00:17:02.000 You don't honor and obey your parents because they are perfect and have it all figured out. 00:17:02.000 --> 00:17:10.000 First and foremost, you do it because the Bible, which we believe to be God's infallible world, tells us to do it. 00:17:10.000 --> 00:17:15.000 But there's also another reason that the Bible gives us here. 00:17:15.000 --> 00:17:19.000 See, the first four commandments all have an explanation tacked on to them, right? 00:17:19.000 --> 00:17:23.000 The first commandment promises something. 00:17:23.000 --> 00:17:24.000 Honor your father. 00:17:24.000 --> 00:17:25.000 Sorry. 00:17:25.000 --> 00:17:27.000 No, sorry. 00:17:27.000 --> 00:17:31.000 The first four commandments, yeah, they have explanations tacked on to them, right? 00:17:31.000 --> 00:17:35.000 This is the first commandment that promises something to us. 00:17:35.000 --> 00:17:37.000 Paul says this in Ephesians 6. 00:17:37.000 --> 00:17:40.000 This is the first commandment with a promise. 00:17:40.000 --> 00:17:47.000 Honor your father and mother that your days may be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you. 00:17:47.000 --> 00:17:50.000 The 10 words were given to the Israelites. 00:17:50.000 --> 00:17:56.000 If you recall the situations and where they are, they're on their way out of Egypt, going to the promised land. 00:17:56.000 --> 00:17:58.000 It makes sense, right? 00:17:58.000 --> 00:18:02.000 Your days will be long in the land that the Lord your God is giving you. 00:18:02.000 --> 00:18:05.000 You will remember that they are on their way to the promised land. 00:18:05.000 --> 00:18:07.000 So that's okay. 00:18:07.000 --> 00:18:08.000 I can get behind that. 00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:10.000 But what does it have to do with me? 00:18:10.000 --> 00:18:15.000 What does that mean to us? 00:18:15.000 --> 00:18:21.000 Does it mean that we have to follow this command and then we will live forever? 00:18:21.000 --> 00:18:25.000 Or that we will live in another promised land or something? 00:18:25.000 --> 00:18:27.000 No, that's not what it means. 00:18:27.000 --> 00:18:35.000 In Deuteronomy, the fifth book of Moses, when the words, the 10 words are written down a second time, 00:18:35.000 --> 00:18:37.000 it actually says something a bit different. 00:18:37.000 --> 00:18:42.000 It says, honor your father and mother so that your days may be extended. 00:18:42.000 --> 00:18:46.000 That it may go well with you in the land that he is about to give you. 00:18:46.000 --> 00:18:49.000 And Paul is using that sentence in Ephesians 6, 2. 00:18:49.000 --> 00:18:52.000 So how do we understand this? 00:18:52.000 --> 00:18:54.000 And why should we care? 00:18:54.000 --> 00:18:56.000 So I think the reason is truthful. 00:18:56.000 --> 00:18:57.000 There's two reasons. 00:18:57.000 --> 00:19:06.000 So first of all, we can say that having two parents who are married is a good thing. 00:19:06.000 --> 00:19:10.000 Physically, mentally, psychologically. 00:19:10.000 --> 00:19:13.000 And I'm not just saying that because I want to say it's... 00:19:13.000 --> 00:19:17.000 I say this because there is countless studies that confirm that. 00:19:17.000 --> 00:19:19.000 It's very much observable. 00:19:19.000 --> 00:19:23.000 Non-Christians say that as well. 00:19:23.000 --> 00:19:31.000 There's countless studies that actually say growing up with one or two parents makes a difference 00:19:31.000 --> 00:19:36.000 on our health, on our mental health, on our career chances, on our education, to mention just a few. 00:19:36.000 --> 00:19:40.000 And I don't want to say this to hurt you. I don't want to say this to judge you. 00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:45.000 But I want to say this because the Bible is right. 00:19:45.000 --> 00:19:52.000 God's intention for what a family is supposed to look like works. 00:19:52.000 --> 00:19:56.000 God is our Creator and He knows what's best for us. 00:19:56.000 --> 00:20:00.000 And we're actually in a crisis. 00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:06.000 In the 1960s, about 90% of babies were born to couples who were married. 00:20:06.000 --> 00:20:08.000 Today, it's about 50%. 00:20:08.000 --> 00:20:10.000 And these are the facts. 00:20:10.000 --> 00:20:12.000 And it's something to lament over. 00:20:12.000 --> 00:20:17.000 And it's something that we should change as a generation. 00:20:17.000 --> 00:20:21.000 We should go back to that biblical view of what marriage is. 00:20:21.000 --> 00:20:25.000 A quarry delivered a great sermon about that the other week. 00:20:25.000 --> 00:20:29.000 So go back and listen to that. 00:20:29.000 --> 00:20:33.000 And again, I don't say this to make you feel bad about yourself. 00:20:33.000 --> 00:20:38.000 If you come from that kind of a background, the Bible actually is full of complicated families 00:20:38.000 --> 00:20:45.000 and full of stories about God working through these complex family issues 00:20:45.000 --> 00:20:51.000 and redeeming them and healing wounds and using people for amazing things. 00:20:51.000 --> 00:20:59.000 Okay, the second thing, how does it make a go well with us in the land that God is giving us? 00:20:59.000 --> 00:21:03.000 So the second reason is spiritual well-being. 00:21:03.000 --> 00:21:10.000 If you honor your parents, you will do what they say and you will thank them for it. 00:21:10.000 --> 00:21:17.000 Parents of God's heart will raise their children up to place their faith in Jesus Christ. 00:21:17.000 --> 00:21:20.000 Now, I know it doesn't work like that. 00:21:20.000 --> 00:21:24.000 It's not as easy as that. There's a lot of mystery involved in all of that. 00:21:24.000 --> 00:21:27.000 No question. Ultimately, God has the last say. 00:21:27.000 --> 00:21:34.000 But I think we can all agree that parents who reflect the character of God want the best for you 00:21:34.000 --> 00:21:38.000 because they love you and they love God and this is for the children. 00:21:38.000 --> 00:21:44.000 You will be wise to listen to your parents and to do what they say. 00:21:44.000 --> 00:21:47.000 Okay. 00:21:47.000 --> 00:21:49.000 What does this mean for us? 00:21:49.000 --> 00:21:53.000 How can we practically honor our parents? 00:21:53.000 --> 00:21:58.000 The answer to that might not be so simple because for different people in different stages of life 00:21:58.000 --> 00:22:02.000 in different situations with different backgrounds with different parents, 00:22:02.000 --> 00:22:05.000 it might mean different things. 00:22:05.000 --> 00:22:10.000 So for some of us who grew up with God-fearing parents, 00:22:10.000 --> 00:22:16.000 it might simply mean to say, thank you, mom, and thank you, dad. 00:22:16.000 --> 00:22:19.000 Thank you for everything you have done for me. 00:22:19.000 --> 00:22:23.000 Or maybe just yes, mom, yes, dad. 00:22:23.000 --> 00:22:27.000 I feel like I'm honoring your parents 101 here. 00:22:27.000 --> 00:22:32.000 Saying, I'm sorry. Saying hello to your parents. 00:22:32.000 --> 00:22:35.000 If you don't live at home, give your parents a call. 00:22:35.000 --> 00:22:37.000 Spend time with them. Send them cards. 00:22:37.000 --> 00:22:42.000 Let them know that you're thankful for the way they have raised you. 00:22:42.000 --> 00:22:49.000 For some of us here, the commandment can mean much more. 00:22:49.000 --> 00:22:53.000 For some of you, this commandment actually can be hurtful. 00:22:53.000 --> 00:22:58.000 I have a friend who was born into a house with abusive parents. 00:22:58.000 --> 00:23:02.000 And I remember a conversation that I had with her, I was years ago, 00:23:02.000 --> 00:23:07.000 but I remember it very clearly that she quoted this commandment on me and said, 00:23:07.000 --> 00:23:12.000 look, I'm an Annoiur Christian, but I don't want to follow a God 00:23:12.000 --> 00:23:19.000 who tells me to honor my parents, who abused me and who did nothing but bad things to me. 00:23:19.000 --> 00:23:24.000 And if that's the case and you grew up with parents like that, 00:23:24.000 --> 00:23:29.000 then I'm sorry, and I want you to know that it's not right. 00:23:29.000 --> 00:23:31.000 And it shouldn't be like this. 00:23:31.000 --> 00:23:35.000 God's heart that He reveals in this commandment 00:23:35.000 --> 00:23:42.000 is for families and for parents to honor Him and for children to love their parents. 00:23:42.000 --> 00:23:48.000 Some of you here tonight will have grown up in broken homes, divorced parents, 00:23:48.000 --> 00:23:50.000 parents who have died maybe. 00:23:50.000 --> 00:23:55.000 This commandment that we are looking at, it reveals God's heart about this, 00:23:55.000 --> 00:24:01.000 good parents who reflect God's character and good children who honor their parents. 00:24:01.000 --> 00:24:05.000 Look, if you never had parents who honored God or were good to you, 00:24:05.000 --> 00:24:08.000 then I've got news for you. 00:24:08.000 --> 00:24:12.000 We have a good Father in heaven, the creator of this universe. 00:24:12.000 --> 00:24:16.000 We have an amazing God who's like a mother to us. 00:24:16.000 --> 00:24:19.000 That's what Isaiah 49 says. 00:24:19.000 --> 00:24:27.000 Hebrews 2 verse 11 speaks about Jesus, God the Son, becoming to us like a brother. 00:24:27.000 --> 00:24:33.000 Now, God cannot physically hug you, but He's giving you brothers and sisters 00:24:33.000 --> 00:24:37.000 in the eternal church family who can give you a hug. 00:24:37.000 --> 00:24:45.000 God actually tells you in His Word that you are honored and loved and precious in His sight. 00:24:45.000 --> 00:24:51.000 If you trust in God, you will be adopted into His big family. 00:24:51.000 --> 00:24:57.000 He becomes a father to the fatherless as we read in the call to worship Psalm 68. 00:24:57.000 --> 00:25:01.000 So maybe if you have a difficult relationship with your parents, 00:25:01.000 --> 00:25:06.000 God is asking you to go the next step towards forgiveness perhaps. 00:25:06.000 --> 00:25:09.000 See, this passage is actually very challenging. 00:25:09.000 --> 00:25:12.000 It became from something that seemed a bit funny to us, 00:25:12.000 --> 00:25:16.000 to something that is really difficult and complex. 00:25:16.000 --> 00:25:19.000 They are still your parents. 00:25:19.000 --> 00:25:25.000 If you hate your parents, maybe it's time for you to pray to God and to ask Him 00:25:25.000 --> 00:25:30.000 to help you to find strength, to take the next step in forgiving them, 00:25:30.000 --> 00:25:33.000 to find healing for your family situations. 00:25:33.000 --> 00:25:36.000 Or maybe your parents are already a bit older. 00:25:36.000 --> 00:25:40.000 Then the situation for you will be different again. 00:25:40.000 --> 00:25:45.000 Perhaps honoring your parents means taking care of them, making sure they're doing okay. 00:25:45.000 --> 00:25:50.000 Maybe it means visiting them more often, having more important conversations 00:25:50.000 --> 00:25:52.000 about life than ever before. 00:25:52.000 --> 00:25:55.000 You might be surprised by the things you will discover about your parents 00:25:55.000 --> 00:25:57.000 or rediscover about your parents. 00:25:57.000 --> 00:26:02.000 Perhaps you are a parent who is struggling tonight. 00:26:02.000 --> 00:26:06.000 Maybe you're struggling with dealing with your child. 00:26:06.000 --> 00:26:10.000 You find it extremely difficult to reflect God's character 00:26:10.000 --> 00:26:13.000 and to raise them up in placing their faith in Christ. 00:26:13.000 --> 00:26:17.000 Or maybe you are a parent and your children are a bit older 00:26:17.000 --> 00:26:19.000 and you only came to faith later on in life 00:26:19.000 --> 00:26:23.000 and you regret that you never told them about God. 00:26:23.000 --> 00:26:30.000 Listen, Jesus Christ came and fulfilled this law to make things right. 00:26:30.000 --> 00:26:35.000 He came to make families right, to build bridges, to heal wounds. 00:26:35.000 --> 00:26:39.000 And you must never forget that it all depends on God's grace. 00:26:39.000 --> 00:26:44.000 You must never forget that He wants you to enjoy Him and become close to Him. 00:26:44.000 --> 00:26:47.000 It's never too late to start praying for your children 00:26:47.000 --> 00:26:52.000 and it's never too late to ask for forgiveness from our Heavenly Father. 00:26:52.000 --> 00:26:58.000 It's all about Christ and what He has done for us. 00:26:58.000 --> 00:27:02.000 So therefore, honor your Father and Mother 00:27:02.000 --> 00:27:08.000 that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land. 00:27:08.000 --> 00:27:10.000 Amen.