WEBVTT 00:00:00.620 --> 00:00:05.820 Good morning again to all of you. I've said this many times, I'll say it again, the sound 00:00:05.820 --> 00:00:12.259 of children in this building just fills me with joy. It's the best sound there is. Kids, 00:00:12.339 --> 00:00:17.359 I'm so glad that you're here, and I'm so glad that we get to celebrate Easter together. 00:00:17.800 --> 00:00:25.339 I know my kids are here somewhere as well, so hello to you. Hey, to my kids. And I'm 00:00:25.339 --> 00:00:30.320 so glad that we can be together. This is a long-awaited Easter, I think, for many reasons 00:00:30.320 --> 00:00:38.359 that we'll get into. But we are in…we've been in a series actually for a while called 00:00:38.359 --> 00:00:42.760 Emotionally Healthy Spirituality. And we've been talking about this because it's, I think, 00:00:42.799 --> 00:00:51.179 very important to recognize that Easter, resurrection, the promise of the renewal that 00:00:51.179 --> 00:00:56.740 comes with the gospel doesn't just apply to us spiritually. It's not just about getting saved, 00:00:57.240 --> 00:01:02.200 getting a kind of punch card that gets us into heaven. It's not just about renewing us physically, 00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:08.039 meaning that we will be given new bodies and this world will be restored. It's about that, 00:01:08.079 --> 00:01:14.039 but it's not only about that. It's not about social renewal and all of the broken systems 00:01:14.039 --> 00:01:19.400 being set right in the world. It's about these things, but it's not only about these things. 00:01:19.400 --> 00:01:26.740 It also brings with it the promise of emotional renewal. And for many of us, emotional renewal is 00:01:26.740 --> 00:01:35.719 something that we think very little about, and yet it probably affects us every waking moment of our 00:01:35.719 --> 00:01:41.860 lives. And so we've been focusing on the power of the gospel to renew people emotionally, to renew us 00:01:41.860 --> 00:01:47.900 in that way. And in addition, in case you didn't figure it out already, this is Easter Sunday, 00:01:47.900 --> 00:01:53.880 and so we want to focus on Easter stories. We want to focus on the resurrection. And so this morning, 00:01:53.940 --> 00:01:59.260 I'm excited to focus on maybe my favorite Easter story of all. This has been my favorite story 00:01:59.260 --> 00:02:04.960 probably ever since I first read it 20 years ago when I really came to faith. So we're going to be 00:02:04.960 --> 00:02:10.780 looking at this story in John chapter 21. And John chapter 21 shows us about the power of the gospel, 00:02:10.780 --> 00:02:30.439 the power of the gospel, the power of the gospel, the power of Easter to heal shame. 00:02:32.120 --> 00:02:38.500 Peter has this encounter with the risen Lord Jesus that profoundly changes him because Jesus is able 00:02:38.500 --> 00:02:46.280 to heal his shame. And if you're someone who is in need of that kind of healing, as I quite frankly am, 00:02:47.219 --> 00:02:52.460 then this story is for you. And the good news of Easter is that it's available not just to Peter, 00:02:52.520 --> 00:02:58.099 but to everyone. So we're going to look at John 21. It's going to show us three things, the problem of 00:02:58.099 --> 00:03:05.780 shame, the dynamics of shame, how shame works in us, and then finally the answer to shame. 00:03:05.780 --> 00:03:12.879 How Easter is that answer? Let's pray. Lord, we thank you for your word, and we thank you for your 00:03:12.879 --> 00:03:18.139 son, and we thank you for the empty tomb. We thank you for the hope that it gives us. 00:03:19.360 --> 00:03:27.599 Lord, in years past, we focused on the evidence that leads us to believe with great confidence that 00:03:27.599 --> 00:03:31.539 this resurrection happened. But now, Lord, we ask you to show us what that means. 00:03:31.539 --> 00:03:36.879 What difference does that make for us as we sit here this morning? What difference does that make 00:03:36.879 --> 00:03:41.399 in a world that has suffered through a pandemic and economic collapse and political division 00:03:41.399 --> 00:03:46.399 and all of the other things that have, all of the other ills that we have suffered through, Lord? 00:03:46.939 --> 00:03:52.180 Most recently, mass shootings and death, Lord. We ask that you would show us what the resurrection 00:03:52.180 --> 00:03:56.659 means for our own hearts. We pray this in your son's holy name. Amen. 00:03:56.659 --> 00:04:02.979 Amen. So, the problem of shame. Some of you may have seen the film that came out years back called 00:04:02.979 --> 00:04:10.019 Force Majeure. Force Majeure is about a family. They go on a ski vacation in the French Alps, and they're 00:04:10.019 --> 00:04:15.259 staying at a ski resort. One beautiful afternoon, it's the second day of their week-long vacation. 00:04:15.439 --> 00:04:21.439 They're eating lunch together out on the veranda of the ski resort, and there's this beautiful shot of 00:04:21.439 --> 00:04:27.680 the Alps just behind. The mountains are just behind this veranda, and you have a husband, 00:04:27.899 --> 00:04:33.139 Tomas, and you have a wife, Ebba, and then you have their two children. And they're sitting there 00:04:33.139 --> 00:04:38.199 eating lunch, and there's a little rumble, and people turn, and they look up, and you can tell 00:04:38.199 --> 00:04:41.540 that there's something happening out of the shot, and then all of a sudden, you begin to see snow 00:04:41.540 --> 00:04:45.579 coming down, and people start to get interested, and they say, oh, it looks like an avalanche. Oh, 00:04:45.639 --> 00:04:48.819 this is going to be really cool. And people start to get their cameras and their binoculars, 00:04:48.819 --> 00:04:54.819 and our family, Tomas and Ebba, they kind of stand up, and they're, wow, what's happening? And 00:04:54.819 --> 00:04:59.379 the snow begins to come down the mountain, and people are taking pictures, and they're oohing and 00:04:59.379 --> 00:05:04.879 aahing, and then it gets closer, and it gets closer, and it gets closer, and the rumbling gets 00:05:04.879 --> 00:05:09.100 louder and louder and louder, and all of a sudden, people start panicking and screaming because it 00:05:09.100 --> 00:05:13.740 looks like the avalanche is going to crash right into the veranda. And so people start turning around 00:05:13.740 --> 00:05:19.379 and grabbing their things and running and screaming, and at that moment, at that moment, 00:05:20.319 --> 00:05:27.540 Ebba, the mom, grabs her children and covers them. As they cry out for their father, 00:05:28.360 --> 00:05:37.819 Daddy, Daddy. Tomas grabs his phone, pushes a man out of the way, and runs screaming off camera, 00:05:37.819 --> 00:05:48.459 abandoning his family. Turns out it's a false alarm. The snow, smoke, and haze begins to clear, 00:05:49.120 --> 00:05:55.000 and in the clearing haze, you can see people sort of getting back to their feet and sitting back down 00:05:55.000 --> 00:06:01.959 at their lunches, and you can see Ebba comforting the children and getting them to sit back down, 00:06:01.959 --> 00:06:10.079 and then slowly and very awkwardly, Tomas comes walking back onto the camera, looking around and 00:06:10.079 --> 00:06:17.779 kind of chuckling, and awkwardly sits down with his family and asks, everybody okay? And nobody will 00:06:17.779 --> 00:06:26.519 make eye contact with him. None of his family say a word to him. And the shame of that moment, 00:06:26.519 --> 00:06:36.759 the shame of that choice in that moment of panic haunts Tomas and Ebba, the rest of the film. It 00:06:36.759 --> 00:06:43.319 in fact starts to rot Tomas from the inside out. It starts to erode their marriage. He can't let it 00:06:43.319 --> 00:06:48.959 go. She can't let it go. It just sits under the surface and breaks everything apart. And that's what 00:06:48.959 --> 00:06:56.039 shame does. And you know, I think that this scene sort of gives us a little bit of insight into how 00:06:56.040 --> 00:07:07.240 the disciple Peter must have felt in the days following Easter, the days following the crucifixion, 00:07:07.800 --> 00:07:15.960 right? Peter is this man who had pledged himself to Jesus. He had sworn on multiple occasions, 00:07:16.280 --> 00:07:22.820 I'm going to follow you anywhere. Even if I have to lay down my life for you, I am committed to you, 00:07:22.819 --> 00:07:30.879 Jesus. He had made all of these audacious pledges of his loyalty. But then Peter was arrested. 00:07:32.120 --> 00:07:38.480 And it says that as Jesus was being taken away after Jesus was arrested, Peter is following along 00:07:38.480 --> 00:07:45.500 behind, but at a distance so nobody would know that he was associated with Jesus. And then it says that 00:07:45.500 --> 00:07:51.560 somebody had built a charcoal fire. And so Peter sits down next to the fire. And as he sits down, 00:07:51.560 --> 00:08:00.839 a woman looks at him and says, hey, aren't you one of Jesus's disciples? And an avalanche of panic 00:08:00.839 --> 00:08:08.740 and fear washes over Peter. And in that moment, he says, no, no, you're mistaken. And then somebody 00:08:08.740 --> 00:08:12.819 else says, no, no, no, I could sworn that you were one of his disciples. I've seen you with him before. 00:08:12.860 --> 00:08:16.040 He says, no, absolutely not. I don't know what you're talking about. And then a third person says, 00:08:16.040 --> 00:08:20.620 yeah, I'm really certain that I've seen you with Jesus before. And he says, I tell you the truth, 00:08:20.819 --> 00:08:21.860 I don't even know the man. 00:08:25.060 --> 00:08:33.300 And Luke 22, 61 tells us that at that moment, the rooster crows. And Jesus, who's being arrested, 00:08:33.620 --> 00:08:38.740 hauled away by soldiers, turns. And he makes eye contact with Peter. 00:08:38.740 --> 00:08:46.779 And there's this moment of eye contact, a look of knowing. And so Peter gets up from the fire. He 00:08:46.779 --> 00:08:52.120 runs out away where nobody can see him. And he collapses. And it says, he weeps bitterly 00:08:52.120 --> 00:09:01.320 over what he's done. So by the time we get to John chapter 21, it's been days after Easter weekend, 00:09:01.320 --> 00:09:08.840 God only knows how many nights Peter had lain there in agony. You know, shame, one of the things 00:09:08.840 --> 00:09:16.040 it does, it just keeps you awake at night. You toss and you turn. And God only knows how many nights 00:09:16.040 --> 00:09:22.379 Peter laid there at three o'clock, four o'clock in the morning, replaying that scene in his mind 00:09:22.379 --> 00:09:29.360 over and over, wishing that he could go back, wishing that he could take it back. You can only imagine 00:09:29.360 --> 00:09:34.480 Peter laying there in agony, just fantasizing about what he would say if he could go back and do it 00:09:34.480 --> 00:09:42.700 again. Fantasizing about standing up and saying, I am a follower of Jesus. I would follow him anywhere. 00:09:42.879 --> 00:09:49.639 I would lay down my life for him. I love that man. And surely he comforted himself and thought, 00:09:49.639 --> 00:09:54.539 if I could only go back, that's what I would say. That's what I would do. That's the real me. 00:09:54.539 --> 00:10:04.860 So in John chapter 21 verse 3, when Peter says, I'm going fishing, there's a lot going on in that 00:10:04.860 --> 00:10:13.319 little statement. That statement is the result of the impact of shame on Peter's identity. By this 00:10:13.319 --> 00:10:19.219 point, Scripture tells us, and it's easy to miss this, by this point when Peter says, I'm going fishing, 00:10:19.220 --> 00:10:25.460 Scripture tells us in a couple of different places, not only in the Gospels, but Paul says it in 1 Corinthians 00:10:25.460 --> 00:10:32.899 15, that Peter had seen the risen Jesus face to face. That when Jesus rose, he made a special 00:10:32.899 --> 00:10:38.180 appearance to Peter. So by this point, Peter has already seen the risen, he knows he's resurrected. 00:10:39.720 --> 00:10:46.399 So you ask, well, why is he going fishing? And the answer is, it's because Peter no longer 00:10:46.399 --> 00:10:57.759 believes that he's a disciple. A disciple has one job, follow your master. One job, follow your master. 00:10:59.039 --> 00:11:05.620 Peter failed in that one job when it counted most. So he's gone back to his former life that he had 00:11:05.620 --> 00:11:09.459 before Jesus ever called him, the life of a fisherman. He has to do something with his life. 00:11:09.460 --> 00:11:18.019 So shame is about our identity. And this is what makes shame different from guilt. See, 00:11:18.379 --> 00:11:25.860 guilt focuses on what we do. Shame focuses on who we are. Guilt says, I did something bad. Shame says, 00:11:26.100 --> 00:11:34.200 I am bad. Guilt says, I made a mistake. Shame says, I am a mistake. It's completely different. 00:11:34.200 --> 00:11:42.080 Guilt is something that we don't really experience until we're old enough to grasp the impact of our 00:11:42.080 --> 00:11:49.320 actions on another person. It requires a certain amount of empathy. And so we can't really experience 00:11:49.320 --> 00:11:55.740 guilt until somewhere between the ages of three and six, developmentally. So children, if you're here 00:11:55.740 --> 00:12:01.320 and you're younger than that, no offense, but you don't have any empathy. And we don't expect it of you. 00:12:01.320 --> 00:12:07.340 It's just developmentally not possible. The good news is you can't really feel guilty for making 00:12:07.340 --> 00:12:12.700 your parents angry or spilling things. It's just developmentally inappropriate to expect that of you. 00:12:13.100 --> 00:12:22.440 Older kids can. But shame, shame is something that we can feel before we have even acquired language. 00:12:24.220 --> 00:12:29.140 Kurt Thompson's a local psychiatrist. He wrote an amazing book on shame called The Soul of Shame. I 00:12:29.139 --> 00:12:35.779 highly recommend it. But in that book, he says, we usually have no conscious memory of our initial 00:12:35.779 --> 00:12:46.419 encounters with shame. These can take place as early as 15 to 18 months. 15 to 18 months. And usually, 00:12:46.580 --> 00:12:54.360 these early experiences of shame involve a child's response to someone's nonverbal cues. A glance, 00:12:54.360 --> 00:13:01.460 a tone of voice, a tone of voice, body language, gestures, or intensity of behavior that interrupt 00:13:01.460 --> 00:13:07.800 whatever the child may be doing, delivering a subtle but undeniably felt message of disapproval. 00:13:09.639 --> 00:13:17.320 So kids as early as 15 to 18 months can pick up nonverbal cues of disapproval. 00:13:17.320 --> 00:13:27.860 So we feel shame long before we know what shame is. And Brene Brown, who many of you have probably 00:13:27.860 --> 00:13:34.000 heard of, is a very well-known sort of shame and vulnerability researcher. And she says that as we 00:13:34.000 --> 00:13:42.420 get older, we all experience shame, but men and women tend to, according to her, experience shame in 00:13:42.419 --> 00:13:49.259 somewhat different ways for different reasons. So I don't know if this will resonate you, but what 00:13:49.259 --> 00:13:58.879 Brene Brown says is that for many women, for many women, shame is this web of unattainable, conflicting, 00:13:59.259 --> 00:14:05.719 competing expectations about what you're supposed to be. Shame comes in the form of this. You need to have 00:14:05.719 --> 00:14:11.839 an amazing career. You need to be beautiful. You need to be fit. You need to be socially engaged. You need 00:14:11.840 --> 00:14:17.019 to be politically engaged and aware. You need to be an amazing parent. You need to be an amazing wife. 00:14:17.280 --> 00:14:24.399 You need to be all of these things. And so shame comes from this sense that no matter how hard I try, 00:14:24.620 --> 00:14:31.560 I am failing in some or all of these categories. Like shame whispers, you've sacrificed all that time 00:14:31.560 --> 00:14:36.920 with your kids for your career. Why isn't your career further along? What do you have to show for it? 00:14:36.919 --> 00:14:44.959 And she says, for many men, shame comes down to one thing. She says, it's not a whole web of 00:14:44.959 --> 00:14:54.299 expectations that for most men, shame comes down to one thing, being perceived as weak. Being perceived 00:14:54.299 --> 00:15:04.399 as weak. Like Thomas in Force Majeure. Right? The one thing you're supposed to do is the father and the 00:15:04.399 --> 00:15:13.279 husband, protect your family. Right? And he, and he, and he, he freaks out and he runs away. 00:15:14.100 --> 00:15:18.240 And this is another thing that she says that I think is interesting. So just take it for what it is. 00:15:19.059 --> 00:15:28.899 But Brene Brown says that this isn't just because men in our lives are hard on us, right? And tell us we 00:15:28.899 --> 00:15:33.819 can't be vulnerable. This is not just because of dads and coaches. She actually says that, that some of the 00:15:33.820 --> 00:15:38.920 men that she's talked to say that it's the women in their lives who are even harder on them when they 00:15:38.920 --> 00:15:45.700 are weak. So the problem of shame is this. If we kind of hold all this together, here's the problem 00:15:45.700 --> 00:15:51.500 of shame. Almost everyone experiences it from a very early age and yet almost no one knows how to 00:15:51.500 --> 00:15:59.120 deal with it. We don't know how to deal with our shame. So some people respond by numbing themselves. 00:15:59.120 --> 00:16:08.679 Right? Brene Brown says this is why we are the most in debt, obese, addicted, and medicated adult 00:16:08.679 --> 00:16:16.320 cohort in U.S. history. She says that's unresolved shame. Some people try to perfect themselves. 00:16:17.779 --> 00:16:25.080 They become highly perfectionistic about themselves, their marriages, their kids. Some people 00:16:25.080 --> 00:16:33.280 blame shift. They offload their shame onto another person or another group of people. It's all their 00:16:33.280 --> 00:16:38.580 fault. It's not my fault. That's a lot of what politics has become in our culture for many people. 00:16:38.980 --> 00:16:45.840 Some people in our society have learned how to weaponize shame and use it to coerce people to move 00:16:45.840 --> 00:16:52.379 in the direction that they believe will be best for society. So this is the problem of shame. Almost 00:16:52.379 --> 00:16:59.639 everyone experiences it. Almost no one knows how to deal with it. So I want to say something about how 00:16:59.639 --> 00:17:08.200 shame actually works on us. The dynamics of shame. Before we talk about the answer to shame. Because 00:17:08.200 --> 00:17:18.059 this is really important. Shame comes to us in the form of the stories that we tell ourselves. Shame comes 00:17:18.059 --> 00:17:26.279 to us in the form of the stories that we tell ourselves. There is a broad consensus in the 00:17:26.279 --> 00:17:34.980 research that human beings are hardwired to be storytelling creatures. We are compelled by our 00:17:34.980 --> 00:17:44.759 biology to make meaning out of our lives. So we're neurobiologically hardwired to create stories that make 00:17:44.759 --> 00:17:54.920 meaning of our experiences. So as Brown says, when we fail, when you fail, you are compelled by your 00:17:54.920 --> 00:18:02.019 wiring to come up with a story to explain that failure. And here's the most important truth. 00:18:03.079 --> 00:18:11.879 It doesn't matter if that story is true. Your brain will chemically reward you for coming up with a 00:18:11.880 --> 00:18:17.940 story that is false every bit as much as it will a story that is true. So accuracy doesn't matter. 00:18:19.020 --> 00:18:26.140 Whether or not it aligns with reality doesn't matter. But a story is a story is a story from the 00:18:26.140 --> 00:18:35.000 perspective of your brain chemistry. Right? So shame works by telling us stories, devising stories 00:18:35.000 --> 00:18:44.920 about who we are based on our life experiences. So Kurt Thompson, again, this local psychiatrist, 00:18:45.460 --> 00:18:50.339 he uses one of the most helpful analogies that I've ever heard for this. He says that all of us 00:18:50.339 --> 00:18:55.920 have this kind of personal shame attendant. A shame attendant. Imagine somebody just kind of following 00:18:55.920 --> 00:19:02.039 you around all the time, like a little shame attendant. And he says, we each have our own who attends to 00:19:02.039 --> 00:19:04.980 every turn in our storytelling venture. So we have a shame attendant. And we have a shame attendant. 00:19:05.000 --> 00:19:10.859 No matter how large or small the moment, our attendant is waiting to offer advice, suggestions, 00:19:11.180 --> 00:19:17.400 and reflections with the intended purpose of disintegration. Right? So see if this resonates 00:19:17.400 --> 00:19:23.319 with you. And he says, you know, you wake up in the morning. Your shame attendant is there waiting for 00:19:23.319 --> 00:19:28.740 you. You know, you open your eyes. And the first thing your shame attendant says is, wow, you really didn't 00:19:28.740 --> 00:19:34.960 get enough sleep last night. Why'd you stay up so late? What were you thinking? And then you get out of 00:19:34.960 --> 00:19:38.900 bed and you kind of walk into the bathroom and you look and you see yourself in the mirror. And your 00:19:38.900 --> 00:19:44.960 shame attendant is standing there and says, you've put on some weight. Look, those pants barely fit 00:19:44.960 --> 00:19:50.940 anymore. And look at that saggy part. That wasn't there a year ago. And look at your face. Right? 00:19:51.039 --> 00:19:54.180 And you sort of are looking in the mirror and your shame attendant is helpfully pointing out 00:19:54.180 --> 00:19:59.000 things that you might not have noticed. And then as you're brushing your teeth, your shame attendant 00:19:59.000 --> 00:20:03.539 is standing right there and it says, you know, there have been at least five or six times that you 00:20:03.539 --> 00:20:09.079 promised yourself you were going to start exercising, start eating better. How many times did you 00:20:09.079 --> 00:20:17.299 follow through on those? None? Okay. And it continues to list off example after example after example. 00:20:17.559 --> 00:20:22.619 Maybe it throws in a few memories of other things, other projects that you've started but never 00:20:22.619 --> 00:20:29.200 finished. Maybe your shower leaks and you look up and you're like, I told my spouse a month and a half ago 00:20:29.200 --> 00:20:33.019 I was going to fix that. And your shame attendant says, but you haven't touched it, have you? 00:20:33.480 --> 00:20:40.019 Right? And then before long, this narrative is being constructed of how worthless you are. 00:20:41.319 --> 00:20:46.240 How you're the kind of person who never follows through on anything that you say you'll do. 00:20:48.640 --> 00:20:51.900 Kurt Thompson talks about the shame attendant, but he also points out 00:20:51.900 --> 00:21:00.460 that as Christians we need to recognize that there is a true spiritual evil behind the shame 00:21:00.460 --> 00:21:07.660 attendant. This is not just psychological. This is spiritual. See, we think that satanic attack 00:21:07.660 --> 00:21:13.460 looks like the movies, you know, where things are moving around and it's all scary. No, no, no. A satanic 00:21:13.460 --> 00:21:19.320 attack most often comes in the form of that voice in your mind reminding you of all of those things as 00:21:19.319 --> 00:21:24.919 you're brushing your teeth in the morning. That's spiritual attack. You know, that's what the word 00:21:24.919 --> 00:21:35.240 Satan actually means. It means the accuser. When Jesus predicts Peter's denial in Luke chapter 22, 00:21:35.359 --> 00:21:42.579 verse 31, he says something interesting. He's saying to Peter, before the cock crows, you're going to deny 00:21:42.579 --> 00:21:50.079 me three times. And right there he says, just before that, he says, Simon, Simon, behold, Satan demanded 00:21:50.079 --> 00:21:57.240 to have you that he might sift you like wheat. I used to read that and think the focus is on the 00:21:57.240 --> 00:22:01.819 denial of Jesus. He's going to sift you like wheat, means you're going to deny Jesus, you're going to lose 00:22:01.819 --> 00:22:06.379 your salvation, and that's what the focus is. That's not, in fact, what it's talking about here. 00:22:06.380 --> 00:22:15.540 What it's talking about is the fact that Satan's true aim is to destroy Peter with the shame that 00:22:15.540 --> 00:22:21.480 follows that betrayal. That's what he's talking about. Satan wanted to get you to make a mistake, 00:22:21.660 --> 00:22:27.320 and then he wanted to spend the rest of your living years destroying you because of that mistake. 00:22:27.319 --> 00:22:39.740 Right? Like acid for your soul. This has been Satan's objective ever since the garden when he 00:22:39.740 --> 00:22:46.379 first convinced Adam and Eve to disobey God. See, before the fall, there had been no shame in the 00:22:46.379 --> 00:22:53.359 world. It says that they were naked and unashamed. But after the fall, Satan, the shame attendant, 00:22:53.359 --> 00:22:59.759 points out, right, just after the fall happens, Satan goes, you know you're naked, right? 00:23:01.379 --> 00:23:07.859 You should be ashamed. You should cover up. Nobody wants to see that. 00:23:09.399 --> 00:23:16.479 And shame enters the world, and it's been there ever since. So this is the problem with shame. 00:23:16.740 --> 00:23:22.319 Almost all of us experience it, unless you're, you know, have no empathy. 00:23:24.359 --> 00:23:28.519 No emotional awareness whatsoever, right? Most everybody experiences shame, 00:23:28.879 --> 00:23:34.099 and almost no one knows how to deal with it. And the way shame works is it's rooted in the stories 00:23:34.099 --> 00:23:39.779 we tell ourselves, the voice of our shame attendant. So let's put that together and ask, 00:23:39.879 --> 00:23:46.379 what's the answer, what's the hope that Easter offers us? Here's the answer to shame. The answer to 00:23:46.379 --> 00:23:52.839 shame is the truth of the resurrection and all that it means. Because here's how it works. 00:23:52.839 --> 00:23:59.579 There's one story that shame is trying to tell us about who we are. Every minute of every day, 00:24:00.099 --> 00:24:07.539 your shame attendant is telling you stories about who you are. And its objective is to convince you 00:24:07.539 --> 00:24:14.480 that you are not worthy of love or belonging. That's one story. You're worthless. 00:24:14.480 --> 00:24:25.620 The only way to be free from that story is to find another story. To find another story. And Easter 00:24:25.620 --> 00:24:35.380 tells us another story. A better story. A true story. Believing in the fact of the resurrection 00:24:35.380 --> 00:24:40.819 is very important. We said that at the outset. But it's not enough to heal shame. There are a lot of 00:24:40.819 --> 00:24:45.339 people who look at the evidence and they're like, yeah, I really believe that Jesus rose. But there's 00:24:45.339 --> 00:24:50.619 a disconnect between that and their shame. Right? It's not enough to believe that it happened. 00:24:51.579 --> 00:24:56.339 Peter believes in the fact of the resurrection. He had the advantage of seeing Jesus face to face. 00:24:57.000 --> 00:25:03.839 But he's still in the vice grip of shame. He's still the guy who betrayed Jesus. Peter, 00:25:03.839 --> 00:25:11.480 who are you? I'm the guy who betrayed Jesus. And that's what this encounter at the beach is all 00:25:11.480 --> 00:25:16.839 about. You say, well, what's going on with this little breakfast scene here? Here's what holds it 00:25:16.839 --> 00:25:25.079 all together. Jesus is giving Peter a new story with a new identity attached to it. And you say, well, 00:25:25.099 --> 00:25:33.000 how's he doing that? He is recreating the circumstances of Peter's calling. Peter was fishing 00:25:33.000 --> 00:25:38.660 when Jesus called him and said, leave your nets and come and follow me. He recreates that setting. 00:25:39.019 --> 00:25:48.119 And then he recreates the setting of Peter's betrayal. It is no coincidence that Jesus builds 00:25:48.119 --> 00:25:55.759 another charcoal fire there on the beach. Right? The olfactory sense is most closely connected to 00:25:55.759 --> 00:26:01.119 memory. And it's not a stretch to imagine that ever since that horrible night of Peter's betrayal, 00:26:01.119 --> 00:26:08.339 every time he smelled a charcoal fire, he went right back to that night. Right back to his moment of 00:26:08.339 --> 00:26:18.939 cowardice. Jesus builds another charcoal fire. And Jesus is putting the question on the table. 00:26:19.939 --> 00:26:30.299 Which Peter is the true Peter? Right? Peter the disciple? Peter the coward? Who's the real Peter? 00:26:31.119 --> 00:26:38.699 You know, as we said before, how many nights had Peter laid awake in his bed in agony, tossing and 00:26:38.699 --> 00:26:44.959 turning, wishing, if only I could go back, I would tell that woman and those two men, yes, I know Jesus. 00:26:45.339 --> 00:26:50.699 Yes, I followed Jesus for three years. Yes, I love Jesus. I would give my life for Jesus. Take me away. 00:26:50.700 --> 00:26:57.920 I want to die right next to him. Don't you understand that here on the beach over breakfast, 00:26:58.220 --> 00:27:04.940 Jesus is giving Peter that chance to go back and to say what he wished he could have said. 00:27:05.759 --> 00:27:10.580 He asks him three times, once for each denial. 00:27:10.579 --> 00:27:18.279 Simon, son of John, do you love me? Yes, Lord, you know that I love you. 00:27:19.059 --> 00:27:23.519 Simon, son of John, do you love me? Yes, Lord, you know that I love you. 00:27:24.379 --> 00:27:27.799 Simon, son of John, do you love me? Lord, you know everything. 00:27:28.619 --> 00:27:32.699 You know that I love you. His soul is being knit back together. 00:27:32.700 --> 00:27:41.059 The shame is evaporating. The lies of the accuser, the shame attendant, are being silenced as he speaks 00:27:41.059 --> 00:27:47.779 these words. Jesus already knows the answer to the question. He's doing this for Peter because 00:27:47.779 --> 00:27:58.019 Peter needs to hear his own voice saying this to Jesus. Peter needs this. This entire encounter is 00:27:58.019 --> 00:28:05.480 nothing short of a liturgy. This is a liturgy aimed at silencing the voice of shame and telling a new 00:28:05.480 --> 00:28:11.740 story. Not Peter the coward, but Peter the forgiven, Peter the rock, Peter the shepherd. 00:28:12.900 --> 00:28:19.359 And I think this is the true turning point in Peter's life and ministry. Right back in Luke chapter 22, 00:28:19.960 --> 00:28:27.059 when Jesus predicted Peter's denial, he said, I've prayed for you, Peter, that your faith may not fail 00:28:27.059 --> 00:28:32.899 and when you have turned again, strengthen your brothers. You know what's going on there? 00:28:33.579 --> 00:28:40.220 Jesus is saying this. The only way that Peter is going to become the kind of man who can strengthen 00:28:40.220 --> 00:28:48.559 his brothers, who can feed sheep, is if he fails and overcomes the shame that comes with that failure. 00:28:49.599 --> 00:28:55.119 Before this moment on the beach, Peter was overconfident. He was overzealous. He was constantly 00:28:55.119 --> 00:28:59.779 going over the top. He was constantly saying things like, I would die for you. I would do anything for 00:28:59.779 --> 00:29:04.619 you. As we heard this past Thursday, don't wash my feet. Let me wash your feet. Missing the point. 00:29:04.959 --> 00:29:11.659 So overconfident was Peter in his own excellence. And the only way Peter is going to become the kind of 00:29:11.659 --> 00:29:20.179 man who can be the rock of the church, the shepherd of God's people, is to fail, to be broken, 00:29:20.180 --> 00:29:27.140 to face and to ultimately deal with his shame. In other words, to put it more succinctly, 00:29:28.039 --> 00:29:34.740 Peter knows what grace is intellectually. Only now does Peter know what it's like to need grace 00:29:34.740 --> 00:29:43.660 and to have it poured into your life. And out of that brokenness, Peter becomes a new man. He is now 00:29:43.660 --> 00:29:52.080 ready to strengthen his brothers and sisters and to feed God's people. So there is a story, 00:29:52.259 --> 00:29:58.420 just to pull all this together for us, there is a story that shame wants to tell you. There is a 00:29:58.420 --> 00:30:05.940 story that shame is telling you right now. In your mind as you're listening to this, some of you as 00:30:05.940 --> 00:30:13.080 you're managing your kids. There's a story that shame is telling you. And the only goal of that 00:30:13.080 --> 00:30:20.059 story is to break you down, to isolate you, and to convince you that you're not worthy of love or 00:30:20.059 --> 00:30:26.840 belonging. But Easter, the reason for all of this, the reason for the bells, is we're here to announce, 00:30:27.380 --> 00:30:34.019 like heralds in the darkness, a new story. A new story is being told in the world about who you really 00:30:34.019 --> 00:30:42.879 are. And it's the story of a God who made you. It's the story of a God who loves you. It's a story 00:30:42.879 --> 00:30:49.240 of a God who will stop at nothing to ensure that you belong to Him forever. It's a story of a God who 00:30:49.240 --> 00:30:57.039 took all of our shame, all of our failure, all of our sin, and then died in our place to set us free 00:30:57.039 --> 00:31:08.259 from shame and guilt and failure and sin. The only way you will ever know who you are is to know 00:31:08.259 --> 00:31:16.339 whose you are. I remember Dan saying that, and it stuck with me. The only way you're ever going to 00:31:16.339 --> 00:31:23.740 know who you are is to know whose you are. But it's not enough to believe it intellectually. It's not 00:31:23.740 --> 00:31:30.220 enough to kind of hear this and think, okay, what are we doing for lunch? Like Peter, we have to 00:31:30.220 --> 00:31:37.920 inhabit this story again and again and again until we believe it in our bones, in our flesh, in our gut. 00:31:38.440 --> 00:31:43.900 And this is why it's so vital for us to be gathered together for worship on a regular basis. 00:31:44.880 --> 00:31:51.359 Right? Our liturgy, all of the words in this liturgy book are meant to do for us what the liturgy did for 00:31:51.359 --> 00:31:56.959 Peter on the beach. The words of this liturgy are designed to do those two things, to silence the 00:31:56.959 --> 00:32:03.359 voice of shame and accusation, and to reaffirm the story that is true about who you really are, 00:32:03.939 --> 00:32:12.359 who people are, who God has called them to be. And listen, man, you show me somebody who has dealt 00:32:12.359 --> 00:32:18.439 with their shame, you show me someone who knows who Jesus has called them to be in this world, 00:32:18.440 --> 00:32:26.320 and I will show you someone over whom Satan has no hold. And such a person is a threat. 00:32:27.360 --> 00:32:33.940 Such a person is dangerous to all that is dark and unjust in this world. Let's pray. 00:32:37.440 --> 00:32:43.059 Lord, we know this is true, but we need to know that we need to, that we know that we know that we 00:32:43.059 --> 00:32:49.859 know that this is true. That's the reason we sing, it's the reason we pray, it's the reason we confess 00:32:49.859 --> 00:32:55.740 and hear the absolution spoken, it's the reason we pass the peace, it's the reason above all that 00:32:55.740 --> 00:33:02.559 we share in the Lord's Supper. Even as we know this is true through our time together from here on out, 00:33:02.899 --> 00:33:08.819 help us to know that we know that we know that there is no voice of shame in our lives, 00:33:08.819 --> 00:33:13.319 that we are loved and that we belong to you and to one another forever and ever. Amen.