WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.480 You are listening to a message from Southwood Presbyterian Church in Huntsville, Alabama. 00:00:06.980 --> 00:00:09.560 Our passion is to experience and express grace. 00:00:10.080 --> 00:00:10.620 Join us. 00:00:12.040 --> 00:00:17.000 I want to say thanks in advance for praying for me, for my family. 00:00:19.019 --> 00:00:22.960 And I hope you do that when I'm in the United States, not just when I'm in India. 00:00:24.960 --> 00:00:26.679 I need it here too. 00:00:27.640 --> 00:00:30.519 And I'm grateful for many of you that do and let me know that. 00:00:30.679 --> 00:00:31.100 Thank you. 00:00:32.019 --> 00:00:38.439 Our passage this morning is a hard one as Jesus is betrayed and arrested. 00:00:39.719 --> 00:00:45.760 And then while he's being mocked and beaten, we hear Peter's denial of his Lord. 00:00:46.659 --> 00:00:50.799 Two really famous blunders here with Judas and Peter, right? 00:00:51.539 --> 00:00:53.740 It's a tale of two sinners. 00:00:53.740 --> 00:01:06.379 But before we read about them, I want to encourage you not to keep the betrayal and denial of Jesus out there at arm's length. 00:01:06.640 --> 00:01:08.340 It's easy to do that, right? 00:01:08.719 --> 00:01:10.680 These are terrible things. 00:01:10.680 --> 00:01:25.800 Dante puts Judas in the very darkest place in all of hell, right there with Brutus and Cassius, betrayers of Julius Caesar, in one of Satan's three mouths at the center of it all. 00:01:27.080 --> 00:01:28.880 Way removed from me, right? 00:01:29.400 --> 00:01:30.480 I'm definitely not there. 00:01:30.480 --> 00:01:40.079 It's easy to put Peter's denial up there with famous lies like Richard Nixon's denial, I am not a crook. 00:01:41.520 --> 00:01:45.079 Bill Clinton's denial of inappropriate relationships. 00:01:45.320 --> 00:01:46.500 Way removed from me. 00:01:46.760 --> 00:01:47.620 I haven't done that. 00:01:47.620 --> 00:01:57.920 But if we do that, we will miss some hard realities of what sin looks like in our own hearts and lives. 00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:00.280 A lot more like them than we wish it were. 00:02:00.719 --> 00:02:08.360 And what's worse, if we miss that, then we'll miss a view of our Savior that our hearts really need. 00:02:09.180 --> 00:02:09.980 Spoiler alert. 00:02:10.780 --> 00:02:15.319 The tale of two sinners is really a story of a Savior for sinners. 00:02:15.319 --> 00:02:17.219 We need to see Him. 00:02:17.560 --> 00:02:24.560 So as I read these familiar stories, remember, these are two of Jesus' twelve disciples, His close friends. 00:02:25.239 --> 00:02:28.159 They've been there with Him, heard His teaching. 00:02:28.699 --> 00:02:32.359 They've shaped their lives around Him like many of us. 00:02:33.979 --> 00:02:43.819 So put yourself in the shoes of these characters and feel some of the tension and angst that's in the air as midnight approaches in Jerusalem. 00:02:43.819 --> 00:02:48.039 Thursday night in a dark garden. 00:02:49.400 --> 00:02:55.799 Jesus, with great drops of blood still dripping from Him in His agony, 00:02:57.079 --> 00:03:02.900 is urging His disciples to pray when some others enter the garden. 00:03:03.199 --> 00:03:05.699 Luke 22 at verse 47. 00:03:05.699 --> 00:03:09.839 While He was still speaking, there came a crowd. 00:03:10.319 --> 00:03:13.879 And the man called Judas, one of the twelve, was leading them. 00:03:14.500 --> 00:03:16.399 He drew near to Jesus to kiss Him. 00:03:16.919 --> 00:03:18.099 But Jesus said to him, 00:03:18.500 --> 00:03:21.439 Judas, would you betray the Son of Man with a kiss? 00:03:23.060 --> 00:03:25.679 And when those who were around Him saw what would follow, they said, 00:03:25.919 --> 00:03:27.439 Lord, shall we strike with the sword? 00:03:27.519 --> 00:03:30.639 And one of them struck the servant of the high priest and cut off his right ear. 00:03:30.639 --> 00:03:33.179 But Jesus said, no more of this. 00:03:33.579 --> 00:03:36.479 And He touched His ear and healed him. 00:03:37.799 --> 00:03:42.639 Then Jesus said to the chief priests and officers of the temple and elders who had come out against Him, 00:03:43.239 --> 00:03:46.879 Have you come out as against a robber with swords and clubs? 00:03:47.079 --> 00:03:50.879 When I was with you day after day in the temple, you did not lay hands on me. 00:03:51.259 --> 00:03:54.539 But this is your hour and the power of darkness. 00:03:54.539 --> 00:03:59.979 Then they seized Him and led Him away, bringing Him into the high priest's house. 00:04:00.179 --> 00:04:02.120 And Peter was following at a distance. 00:04:03.139 --> 00:04:06.759 And when they had kindled a fire in the middle of the courtyard and sat down together, 00:04:06.919 --> 00:04:08.319 Peter sat down among them. 00:04:09.280 --> 00:04:13.659 Then a servant girl, seeing Him as He sat in the light and looking closely at Him, said, 00:04:14.079 --> 00:04:16.219 This man also was with Him. 00:04:17.139 --> 00:04:18.839 But he denied it, saying, 00:04:18.959 --> 00:04:20.480 Woman, I do not know Him. 00:04:20.480 --> 00:04:24.080 And a little later, someone else saw Him and said, 00:04:24.420 --> 00:04:25.780 You also are one of them. 00:04:26.800 --> 00:04:28.660 But Peter said, Man, I am not. 00:04:30.000 --> 00:04:33.780 And after an interval of about an hour, still another insisted, saying, 00:04:34.420 --> 00:04:38.600 Certainly this man also was with Him, for he too is a Galilean. 00:04:39.420 --> 00:04:42.759 But Peter said, Man, I do not know what you are talking about. 00:04:42.759 --> 00:04:47.800 And immediately, while he was still speaking, the rooster crowed. 00:04:48.680 --> 00:04:51.300 And the Lord turned and looked at Peter. 00:04:52.579 --> 00:04:56.680 And Peter remembered the saying of the Lord, how he had said to him, 00:04:57.319 --> 00:05:01.060 Before the rooster crows today, you will deny me three times. 00:05:02.120 --> 00:05:05.699 And he went out and wept bitterly. 00:05:06.899 --> 00:05:08.199 This is God's Word. 00:05:08.279 --> 00:05:08.740 Let's pray. 00:05:08.740 --> 00:05:19.500 Father, I confess that I would like to think how much better I am than Judas or Peter. 00:05:22.800 --> 00:05:32.420 When the truth is, I need to know how much like them I am and how much better Jesus is. 00:05:33.060 --> 00:05:35.040 So would you show us that this morning? 00:05:35.040 --> 00:05:36.939 Show me that again. 00:05:36.939 --> 00:05:37.060 Amen. 00:05:37.480 --> 00:05:40.259 Teach us, we ask in Jesus' name. 00:05:40.600 --> 00:05:40.899 Amen. 00:05:44.259 --> 00:05:49.600 The stories of Judas and Peter diverge significantly at the end. 00:05:50.279 --> 00:05:58.560 But they begin by revealing some shared realities about sin that are still realities in our hearts too. 00:05:59.019 --> 00:06:04.079 The first of those is the self-protective nature of sin. 00:06:04.079 --> 00:06:07.000 Consider Judas' story first here. 00:06:07.399 --> 00:06:15.759 How does the treasurer of the disciples end up leading a band of people coming to arrest Jesus? 00:06:17.379 --> 00:06:26.879 Well, earlier in this chapter, we read that Satan entered Judas and stirred him to seek money in exchange for betraying Jesus. 00:06:26.879 --> 00:06:27.079 Jesus. 00:06:28.259 --> 00:06:35.120 Apparently, Judas has made this intentional decision to cash his chips in, as it were. 00:06:35.959 --> 00:06:37.920 That he's got to get something for this. 00:06:38.019 --> 00:06:39.899 Jesus is not turning out as he hoped. 00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:43.899 Maybe he's not the political messiah Judas had hoped for. 00:06:44.600 --> 00:06:49.399 Maybe it's not getting Judas the power and influence that he longed for. 00:06:49.399 --> 00:06:58.159 We're not really sure why, but Judas decides to be opportunistic with his close relationship with Jesus. 00:06:59.019 --> 00:07:00.779 To take what he can get for it. 00:07:00.839 --> 00:07:03.259 Thirty pieces of silver, as it turns out. 00:07:04.539 --> 00:07:11.919 So in an effort to come out ahead, to be on the right side of history, Judas has positioned himself with the powerful. 00:07:11.920 --> 00:07:12.920 Right? 00:07:13.620 --> 00:07:16.900 He's sold out for some financial stability. 00:07:17.300 --> 00:07:24.700 Determined that what is best for him is not to go down with this Jesus, but instead to protect himself. 00:07:25.160 --> 00:07:26.660 To get what he can for him. 00:07:28.700 --> 00:07:30.360 Sometimes our sin is like that. 00:07:30.420 --> 00:07:37.860 It involves those intentional decisions to find safety and fulfillment in things other than Jesus, doesn't it? 00:07:38.600 --> 00:07:39.700 We call those idols. 00:07:39.699 --> 00:07:43.139 You know how it happens for us. 00:07:43.259 --> 00:07:51.699 We stay in close proximity to Jesus, but I use my church going as a means to build my business and network socially. 00:07:52.459 --> 00:07:57.519 Because money and power and influence are what I really think I need. 00:07:59.300 --> 00:08:04.319 Or we may decide this relationship on the side is what I need. 00:08:04.319 --> 00:08:07.240 Even though I know it's not what Jesus would have for me. 00:08:07.240 --> 00:08:11.680 But getting what I can for myself is priority number one. 00:08:11.840 --> 00:08:16.500 And comfort and pleasure and security are what I really long for. 00:08:16.620 --> 00:08:19.100 And I'm going to have to go get them my way. 00:08:20.740 --> 00:08:29.600 Have you decided that Jesus is fine to hang around, but is not ultimately the one who will fulfill you? 00:08:29.600 --> 00:08:36.600 And determined even if maybe you wouldn't use these exact words to make the best life for yourself? 00:08:39.659 --> 00:08:41.840 Sometimes that's the way our sin works. 00:08:42.159 --> 00:08:48.940 Sometimes that self-protective nature of sin is less premeditated. 00:08:49.159 --> 00:08:51.300 But sneaks up on you. 00:08:52.080 --> 00:08:56.920 Sometimes we plot our sin, but perhaps more often it ambushes us. 00:08:56.919 --> 00:09:00.899 And we fall where we thought we were standing firm. 00:09:01.219 --> 00:09:08.599 See, while Judas has been plotting against Jesus, Peter has been loudly professing his allegiance to Jesus, right? 00:09:09.319 --> 00:09:11.019 He's self-confident. 00:09:11.419 --> 00:09:13.919 Perhaps even self-righteous. 00:09:14.919 --> 00:09:17.819 When Jesus prophesies Peter's denial. 00:09:18.279 --> 00:09:19.339 No way, Jesus. 00:09:19.599 --> 00:09:21.099 No, not me. 00:09:21.699 --> 00:09:22.919 I'll go with you. 00:09:23.099 --> 00:09:24.279 No matter what. 00:09:24.279 --> 00:09:25.120 To the death. 00:09:26.919 --> 00:09:30.059 Peter didn't set out to deny Jesus, did he? 00:09:31.399 --> 00:09:36.979 But when the heat is turned up, he lashes out with a sword first to protect himself. 00:09:37.339 --> 00:09:40.740 Other gospels tell us it's Peter, in case we couldn't have guessed, 00:09:41.339 --> 00:09:46.000 who impetuously cuts off the ear of the high priest's servant before Jesus can even answer the question. 00:09:46.000 --> 00:09:59.139 And then in a desperate attempt to save his own skin, he denies three times with increasing intensity his relationship with Jesus. 00:10:00.080 --> 00:10:03.620 Picture it this way for what's happening to Peter. 00:10:03.960 --> 00:10:05.740 There are storms coming. 00:10:05.879 --> 00:10:07.360 We all know what that's like, don't we? 00:10:07.700 --> 00:10:08.379 Seen one of those? 00:10:08.379 --> 00:10:16.679 And in this split-second decision that I have to run for cover somewhere because there's danger around, 00:10:17.439 --> 00:10:20.659 my heart tells me I'm not safe with Jesus. 00:10:21.939 --> 00:10:26.139 And my sin runs for refuge over here to something else. 00:10:26.240 --> 00:10:29.820 And in the moment, something else seems like that's the safe place. 00:10:29.820 --> 00:10:37.200 So many of you have shared with me a struggle that I relate to myself very well. 00:10:37.560 --> 00:10:39.920 I call it self-protective silence. 00:10:41.340 --> 00:10:45.320 We can deny Jesus without even opening our mouths, can't we? 00:10:46.840 --> 00:10:47.800 It goes like this. 00:10:47.860 --> 00:10:50.100 There's water cooler conversation at work. 00:10:50.100 --> 00:10:54.879 And I feel the prompting to jump in and testify to the greatness of Jesus. 00:10:55.139 --> 00:11:00.420 But I find it easier to go back to the computer and carry on with my day. 00:11:00.840 --> 00:11:03.120 Silence seems safer. 00:11:04.980 --> 00:11:08.740 The other adults on the playground are talking about parenting struggles. 00:11:08.920 --> 00:11:13.420 And the conversation turns towards how these really are revealing struggles in our own hearts. 00:11:13.419 --> 00:11:17.599 And you see the opportunity to share about your own need for Jesus. 00:11:17.979 --> 00:11:22.120 But silence seems safer. 00:11:23.919 --> 00:11:28.299 The other students in class or co-workers in the office are talking science, right? 00:11:28.419 --> 00:11:29.360 Happens sometimes. 00:11:30.740 --> 00:11:34.599 And they're saying things like, can you believe there are actually people who really think? 00:11:35.079 --> 00:11:36.019 Fill in the blank. 00:11:36.259 --> 00:11:37.839 Something you really think. 00:11:39.899 --> 00:11:41.639 And silence seems safer. 00:11:43.419 --> 00:11:46.479 Self-protective silence. 00:11:47.679 --> 00:11:54.019 Y'all, when we are surrounded by people who need the good news of Jesus. 00:11:56.079 --> 00:11:59.639 But we think what we need is safety and protection. 00:12:00.139 --> 00:12:01.639 And that we can give it to ourselves. 00:12:02.099 --> 00:12:09.039 Judas and Peter aren't the only ones who find sin leading them to look out for themselves, are they? 00:12:09.039 --> 00:12:19.279 Perhaps even more poignant in this passage, as you read through it, is the relational nature of sin. 00:12:20.179 --> 00:12:24.299 Sin is not merely, as we sometimes think, breaking a rule. 00:12:25.339 --> 00:12:27.500 It's breaking a relationship. 00:12:28.980 --> 00:12:31.939 Judas infamously betrays Jesus. 00:12:31.939 --> 00:12:32.419 How? 00:12:33.719 --> 00:12:34.980 With a kiss. 00:12:34.980 --> 00:12:37.139 Verse 47. 00:12:37.139 --> 00:12:38.580 Here he comes. 00:12:39.000 --> 00:12:41.700 The man called Judas, one of the twelve. 00:12:42.180 --> 00:12:44.980 One of Jesus' twelve guys is leading them. 00:12:45.820 --> 00:12:49.139 He drew near to Jesus as he had been to kiss him. 00:12:50.060 --> 00:12:54.960 And Jesus said, Judas, would you betray the Son of Man with a kiss? 00:12:55.320 --> 00:12:58.379 This was a normal greeting, by the way, in these days. 00:12:58.379 --> 00:13:02.240 Of respect and intimacy for a friend. 00:13:02.240 --> 00:13:10.259 And Jesus points out to Judas that he's using this personal sign of favor as a sign of betrayal. 00:13:11.679 --> 00:13:15.559 Judas, are you missing the relational nature of this? 00:13:15.759 --> 00:13:17.519 You're turning against me. 00:13:20.580 --> 00:13:24.120 It's even more painfully obvious with Peter, isn't it? 00:13:24.120 --> 00:13:29.980 As they lead Jesus away, Peter is following at a distance. 00:13:30.600 --> 00:13:34.419 Verse 54 says, I think there's some double entendre there. 00:13:35.279 --> 00:13:37.840 Peter is following Jesus at a distance. 00:13:38.340 --> 00:13:39.840 I'm right behind you. 00:13:40.120 --> 00:13:41.679 Behind you all the way. 00:13:42.399 --> 00:13:44.659 Way, way behind you. 00:13:44.919 --> 00:13:46.580 Way behind you, Jesus. 00:13:46.580 --> 00:13:57.500 One denial that he doesn't know Jesus, that he's not associated with him, turns into three really quickly, doesn't it? 00:13:58.860 --> 00:14:02.379 Stronger and clearer denials of their close relationship. 00:14:02.740 --> 00:14:05.379 Doesn't sin always seem to snowball like that? 00:14:05.379 --> 00:14:14.679 And then there's the moment of realization for Peter when what he's doing really hits him. 00:14:14.679 --> 00:14:19.360 Just as he's denying again, knowing about this Jesus. 00:14:19.620 --> 00:14:20.840 Verse 60. 00:14:21.559 --> 00:14:23.659 Man, I don't know what you're talking about. 00:14:23.759 --> 00:14:26.740 And immediately while he was still speaking, the rooster crowed. 00:14:27.340 --> 00:14:30.740 And the Lord turned and looked at Peter. 00:14:30.740 --> 00:14:35.480 We don't know exactly where they were in this process at the high priest's house. 00:14:36.519 --> 00:14:40.120 But as it turns out, Jesus and Peter are able to make eye contact. 00:14:40.919 --> 00:14:43.139 And Peter remembered the saying of the Lord. 00:14:43.639 --> 00:14:49.100 How he had said to him before the rooster crows today, you will deny me three times. 00:14:49.379 --> 00:14:52.840 And he went out and wept bitterly. 00:14:53.480 --> 00:14:55.899 When does the weight of his sin hit him? 00:14:57.340 --> 00:14:59.460 When he locks eyes with Jesus. 00:15:00.740 --> 00:15:04.620 When he remembers Jesus' words warning him of this moment. 00:15:04.779 --> 00:15:08.299 When he sees the sadness, I suspect. 00:15:09.220 --> 00:15:13.299 In the now half-beaten face of Jesus. 00:15:15.180 --> 00:15:19.000 See, it's not merely that I've said something I shouldn't. 00:15:19.240 --> 00:15:22.620 Or I have failed to say something I should have. 00:15:22.740 --> 00:15:25.639 That's not really the essence of the sin. 00:15:25.639 --> 00:15:31.360 It's that I've denied the one who has embraced me. 00:15:31.919 --> 00:15:36.340 I've abandoned the one who has always been there for me. 00:15:37.600 --> 00:15:42.720 I've chosen not merely my way over God's way. 00:15:42.899 --> 00:15:47.019 But myself over God himself. 00:15:47.019 --> 00:15:51.419 That's the ugly reality of our sin. 00:15:51.539 --> 00:15:53.960 Ron was referring to it earlier as we confess. 00:15:55.000 --> 00:15:59.759 It has to sink in for us this morning that that's what our sin is. 00:15:59.759 --> 00:16:04.220 We were created for relationship with God. 00:16:04.220 --> 00:16:06.299 To trust him. 00:16:07.139 --> 00:16:11.039 To find life in his design for us. 00:16:11.360 --> 00:16:14.759 To have joy in knowing him deeply. 00:16:15.000 --> 00:16:17.340 That's what we're created to be about. 00:16:18.399 --> 00:16:20.659 And sin rejects him. 00:16:21.700 --> 00:16:23.720 The value of that relationship. 00:16:23.720 --> 00:16:26.540 As you've heard me say many, many times. 00:16:26.960 --> 00:16:29.680 The heinousness, the evil of our sin. 00:16:29.960 --> 00:16:32.779 Is primarily in the greatness. 00:16:33.259 --> 00:16:36.920 The glory of the one we've sinned against. 00:16:37.680 --> 00:16:40.540 You and you only, God. 00:16:42.220 --> 00:16:43.720 Have I sinned against. 00:16:45.759 --> 00:16:47.700 We don't always think of it that way. 00:16:47.820 --> 00:16:51.840 One of the ways we rationalize and minimize our sin. 00:16:51.840 --> 00:16:53.100 Is to look around and say. 00:16:53.720 --> 00:16:55.960 That didn't really hurt anyone, did it? 00:16:57.160 --> 00:16:57.460 You know. 00:16:57.860 --> 00:16:58.660 No big deal. 00:17:01.240 --> 00:17:04.759 And your sin hasn't overwhelmed you. 00:17:05.360 --> 00:17:09.319 Because you haven't considered the glorious God. 00:17:09.500 --> 00:17:10.839 Who loves you. 00:17:11.100 --> 00:17:13.380 Whom you've turned your back on. 00:17:13.600 --> 00:17:15.440 And walked away from. 00:17:17.079 --> 00:17:18.860 When you realize that. 00:17:19.319 --> 00:17:21.059 I've seen the weight of that. 00:17:21.059 --> 00:17:23.039 Knock a room of elders back. 00:17:23.139 --> 00:17:25.220 Like they've been punched in the gut. 00:17:26.419 --> 00:17:29.799 I felt the guilt that wells up quickly. 00:17:29.940 --> 00:17:32.019 And begins to feel overwhelming. 00:17:33.319 --> 00:17:36.559 Our sin is never theoretical. 00:17:37.519 --> 00:17:40.059 It's never impersonal. 00:17:40.859 --> 00:17:43.419 It's always relational. 00:17:44.220 --> 00:17:45.639 Against our God. 00:17:45.640 --> 00:17:47.700 Can you see that? 00:17:47.700 --> 00:17:48.940 In your own heart. 00:17:49.100 --> 00:17:49.800 In your own life. 00:17:53.500 --> 00:17:55.759 Both Judas and Peter. 00:17:56.420 --> 00:17:58.580 In an effort to protect themselves. 00:17:59.500 --> 00:18:00.700 Sin relationally. 00:18:01.360 --> 00:18:03.220 Against God himself. 00:18:04.540 --> 00:18:05.400 And so do we. 00:18:05.400 --> 00:18:09.860 But here's where their stories split. 00:18:10.259 --> 00:18:12.280 Their paths diverge. 00:18:12.400 --> 00:18:15.780 In such a way that impacts the rest of their lives. 00:18:15.780 --> 00:18:17.240 And their eternities. 00:18:18.240 --> 00:18:21.519 Judas demonstrates no sorrow here. 00:18:22.800 --> 00:18:25.400 Matthew tells us that within 24 hours. 00:18:25.640 --> 00:18:27.000 He's decided. 00:18:27.140 --> 00:18:28.040 He's made a mistake. 00:18:28.460 --> 00:18:29.800 Judas gives the money back. 00:18:29.800 --> 00:18:30.920 And goes out. 00:18:31.259 --> 00:18:33.420 And hangs himself. 00:18:33.420 --> 00:18:36.420 In his guilt. 00:18:36.880 --> 00:18:37.720 And despair. 00:18:37.960 --> 00:18:40.019 He sees no hope. 00:18:40.480 --> 00:18:41.900 Even though he has seen. 00:18:42.080 --> 00:18:43.620 Jesus heal his enemies. 00:18:44.140 --> 00:18:44.380 Right? 00:18:44.580 --> 00:18:45.700 Right there that night. 00:18:45.820 --> 00:18:46.460 In the garden. 00:18:46.600 --> 00:18:48.259 As he reaches over to heal. 00:18:48.380 --> 00:18:50.720 The ear of the high priest's servant. 00:18:51.140 --> 00:18:52.980 Even though Judas has heard. 00:18:53.120 --> 00:18:54.300 His gracious words. 00:18:54.420 --> 00:18:55.320 Over and over. 00:18:55.500 --> 00:18:56.060 First hand. 00:18:56.420 --> 00:18:57.940 Even though he's been close. 00:18:57.940 --> 00:18:58.600 To the Savior. 00:18:58.800 --> 00:18:59.539 Day after day. 00:18:59.620 --> 00:19:00.220 For years. 00:19:00.220 --> 00:19:03.460 His sorrow. 00:19:03.680 --> 00:19:04.940 Is apparently. 00:19:05.279 --> 00:19:06.259 Only worldly. 00:19:07.120 --> 00:19:07.720 Sorrow. 00:19:08.440 --> 00:19:09.500 That I got caught. 00:19:09.940 --> 00:19:10.100 That. 00:19:10.319 --> 00:19:11.799 That things didn't work out. 00:19:12.100 --> 00:19:12.799 As I hoped. 00:19:12.980 --> 00:19:13.640 That I wasn't. 00:19:13.880 --> 00:19:14.720 Strong enough. 00:19:14.819 --> 00:19:15.900 To be successful. 00:19:16.900 --> 00:19:18.059 And that sorrow. 00:19:18.220 --> 00:19:18.600 Leads. 00:19:18.860 --> 00:19:19.240 Only. 00:19:20.380 --> 00:19:21.000 To death. 00:19:23.600 --> 00:19:24.160 Peter. 00:19:24.259 --> 00:19:25.000 On the other hand. 00:19:25.660 --> 00:19:26.620 When he sees. 00:19:26.620 --> 00:19:27.259 His sin. 00:19:27.319 --> 00:19:27.860 What does he do? 00:19:27.859 --> 00:19:28.699 It says he. 00:19:29.699 --> 00:19:30.099 Weeps. 00:19:31.339 --> 00:19:31.859 Bitterly. 00:19:33.639 --> 00:19:34.519 He weeps. 00:19:34.659 --> 00:19:35.059 Bitterly. 00:19:35.319 --> 00:19:36.699 I remember the first time. 00:19:36.839 --> 00:19:37.139 That this. 00:19:37.699 --> 00:19:38.500 Bitter weeping. 00:19:38.740 --> 00:19:39.219 Happened. 00:19:39.679 --> 00:19:40.539 In my life. 00:19:41.299 --> 00:19:43.119 I was a homeschooled kid. 00:19:43.240 --> 00:19:43.819 I don't remember. 00:19:44.119 --> 00:19:44.559 Exactly. 00:19:44.819 --> 00:19:45.459 How old. 00:19:46.679 --> 00:19:47.979 And I was supposed to finish. 00:19:47.979 --> 00:19:49.519 The work I had. 00:19:49.759 --> 00:19:50.419 For the day. 00:19:50.879 --> 00:19:51.619 And I said. 00:19:51.659 --> 00:19:52.299 I was done. 00:19:52.639 --> 00:19:53.679 And part of that work. 00:19:53.679 --> 00:19:54.139 Included. 00:19:54.240 --> 00:19:54.939 Reading a story. 00:19:54.939 --> 00:19:55.819 About a bird. 00:19:55.819 --> 00:19:58.819 I wanted to play baseball. 00:19:59.599 --> 00:20:01.179 And that story looked too long. 00:20:02.519 --> 00:20:03.740 So I just skipped it. 00:20:04.619 --> 00:20:05.859 And I pronounced myself. 00:20:06.099 --> 00:20:06.519 Done. 00:20:06.619 --> 00:20:08.220 And as parents tend to do. 00:20:08.559 --> 00:20:10.119 My mom was on to me. 00:20:10.799 --> 00:20:12.960 She knew this was going on. 00:20:13.319 --> 00:20:13.919 She says. 00:20:14.119 --> 00:20:15.079 Did you read this story? 00:20:15.179 --> 00:20:15.519 Yes. 00:20:16.960 --> 00:20:18.259 You're not lying to me? 00:20:18.339 --> 00:20:19.000 No mom. 00:20:19.079 --> 00:20:19.240 No. 00:20:19.740 --> 00:20:20.939 So she asked questions. 00:20:20.939 --> 00:20:21.899 About the story. 00:20:22.599 --> 00:20:23.740 None of which I could answer. 00:20:23.740 --> 00:20:25.539 But I persisted to deny it. 00:20:25.819 --> 00:20:28.799 She left it alone. 00:20:28.899 --> 00:20:30.259 Waited until my dad came home. 00:20:30.339 --> 00:20:31.740 You always got to be careful for that. 00:20:33.299 --> 00:20:34.399 Dad got home. 00:20:34.579 --> 00:20:36.079 And I denied it again. 00:20:37.099 --> 00:20:40.559 I was several hours into the line. 00:20:40.659 --> 00:20:42.599 Now it was eating at me. 00:20:42.799 --> 00:20:43.899 I couldn't give in. 00:20:44.399 --> 00:20:46.359 I was too good of a kid. 00:20:47.159 --> 00:20:49.599 Maybe some of you kids know what this feels like. 00:20:50.439 --> 00:20:53.980 To think I've got to be a good enough kid for God. 00:20:54.980 --> 00:20:57.039 I can just be the good kid. 00:20:58.539 --> 00:21:02.319 I was trying to make sure I was good enough for God. 00:21:02.660 --> 00:21:04.140 I would never lie. 00:21:04.759 --> 00:21:06.380 Good kids don't lie. 00:21:08.019 --> 00:21:12.059 And I remember my parents had church friends over that night. 00:21:12.059 --> 00:21:15.779 And my dad came upstairs before they went to dinner and said, 00:21:16.279 --> 00:21:20.579 I'm praying that God won't let you rest until you confess your sin. 00:21:21.619 --> 00:21:26.279 But I needed that. 00:21:27.000 --> 00:21:30.759 And I remember lying in my bed alone that night and finally breaking. 00:21:30.759 --> 00:21:34.759 And just weeping bitterly. 00:21:36.440 --> 00:21:37.500 Alone in my bed. 00:21:38.379 --> 00:21:41.740 Part of it was because I knew my lying had hurt my parents. 00:21:42.240 --> 00:21:48.700 But most of it was because I was realizing that I wasn't a good enough kid for God anymore. 00:21:48.700 --> 00:21:50.960 I knew what I'd done. 00:21:51.519 --> 00:21:54.960 And I knew that I had to be perfect for Him. 00:21:55.120 --> 00:21:56.819 And I wasn't that. 00:21:56.940 --> 00:22:03.080 I was coming to the end of myself and realizing I'm not a good enough kid for God anymore. 00:22:04.759 --> 00:22:06.620 I saw that I turned my back on Him. 00:22:07.819 --> 00:22:09.000 I was a lot less righteous. 00:22:09.180 --> 00:22:11.960 In fact, a lot more sinful than I cared to admit. 00:22:12.259 --> 00:22:14.340 And that's scary, isn't it? 00:22:14.339 --> 00:22:19.059 When you see your sin like that, when you realize you're not good enough, 00:22:19.159 --> 00:22:22.759 it's a scary feeling and you may weep over that. 00:22:23.659 --> 00:22:25.539 And yet at the end of all of that, 00:22:26.419 --> 00:22:32.879 the end of myself and the end of not being good enough was Jesus. 00:22:34.220 --> 00:22:37.159 That's actually where God was. 00:22:39.379 --> 00:22:42.399 Peter wept bitterly. 00:22:42.400 --> 00:22:48.700 And this is some speculation, but I believe biblically directed speculation. 00:22:49.580 --> 00:22:51.160 Peter wept bitterly. 00:22:51.660 --> 00:22:51.980 Why? 00:22:54.300 --> 00:23:01.560 Because he was coming to the end of himself after professing that he would stand. 00:23:01.740 --> 00:23:02.480 Remember that? 00:23:02.880 --> 00:23:04.720 It'll never happen to me, Jesus. 00:23:05.259 --> 00:23:06.420 I'll stand with you. 00:23:06.420 --> 00:23:11.440 And now he's seeing his capacity to fall. 00:23:12.400 --> 00:23:14.940 He thought he was good enough. 00:23:15.480 --> 00:23:17.860 And now he knows that he's not. 00:23:19.740 --> 00:23:23.860 And at the end of that was Jesus. 00:23:26.080 --> 00:23:28.000 I love that verse. 00:23:29.280 --> 00:23:33.280 It's when his eyes met Jesus' eyes. 00:23:33.580 --> 00:23:33.740 Right? 00:23:33.740 --> 00:23:37.500 What do you think they saw in Jesus' eyes? 00:23:37.620 --> 00:23:42.099 My guess is deep sadness, the relational breaking hurt Jesus. 00:23:43.599 --> 00:23:45.539 I bet also deep compassion. 00:23:46.240 --> 00:23:50.799 Jesus mourns the evil of sin and the way it wreaks havoc on us. 00:23:50.799 --> 00:23:55.119 And I bet deep love for a broken sinner. 00:23:55.319 --> 00:24:00.680 Love that oozes out of Jesus to the point that he's willing to die for such sinners. 00:24:00.680 --> 00:24:09.640 And Peter is overwhelmed with grief that he would deny such a savior. 00:24:10.279 --> 00:24:16.560 And right there at that lowest point when he sees Jesus looking at him, he remembers Jesus' words, it says. 00:24:17.279 --> 00:24:20.299 And Peter realizes Jesus, he knows what he's talking about. 00:24:20.299 --> 00:24:25.119 He's a trustworthy prophet who told me this sin was going to happen. 00:24:26.119 --> 00:24:35.000 And I think he realizes Jesus is just as effective and trustworthy a prayer as he has said he will pray for Peter. 00:24:35.220 --> 00:24:37.240 That his faith will not fail. 00:24:37.519 --> 00:24:41.259 And that he will repent and strengthen his brothers. 00:24:41.919 --> 00:24:43.200 And that comes to mind. 00:24:43.200 --> 00:24:48.580 And I think as it overwhelms him, Peter realizes that Jesus really does heal. 00:24:49.640 --> 00:24:55.740 He sees that posture of healing towards his enemies, towards those who are against him. 00:24:55.920 --> 00:25:05.200 And for the first time, maybe in a new way, Peter realizes it's not just the servant whose ear he cuts off that's one of those out to get Jesus. 00:25:05.340 --> 00:25:06.519 But he sees who else? 00:25:08.440 --> 00:25:08.960 Himself. 00:25:08.960 --> 00:25:14.160 As one of those who's put himself against Jesus. 00:25:14.400 --> 00:25:18.600 And he realizes Jesus heals people like this. 00:25:19.319 --> 00:25:22.220 He looks into the eyes of his savior. 00:25:23.319 --> 00:25:25.360 I love the way B.B. Warfield said it. 00:25:26.160 --> 00:25:32.299 As our savior was being tried and preparing to bear the sins of us all on the cross, 00:25:32.299 --> 00:25:41.819 He had time to give one glance to a faltering disciple and so save his soul in the saving of the world. 00:25:43.019 --> 00:25:45.980 Sin is personal and relational. 00:25:47.119 --> 00:25:48.559 And so is Jesus. 00:25:49.200 --> 00:25:50.519 Isn't that such good news? 00:25:51.220 --> 00:25:56.740 Jesus is personal and merciful and a healing savior. 00:25:56.740 --> 00:25:59.519 And that's where repentance starts. 00:25:59.940 --> 00:26:06.220 Repentance for us begins with this godly sorrow that turns back to God himself. 00:26:06.779 --> 00:26:14.539 If sin turns from him, right, away from God, then repentance is not merely starting to do some good things. 00:26:15.480 --> 00:26:21.620 Repentance begins with turning back to God himself in that relationship. 00:26:21.619 --> 00:26:25.199 That's the difference between Judas and Peter, by the way. 00:26:25.699 --> 00:26:31.919 Judas remains alone and his sorrow leads to self-hatred and death. 00:26:32.979 --> 00:26:41.099 While Peter turns back to Jesus and his sorrow leads to sin, hatred, and life. 00:26:41.539 --> 00:26:44.439 Reinstated by Jesus as a leader of the early church. 00:26:44.440 --> 00:26:50.120 Paul had some hard things to say to the church in Corinth. 00:26:50.620 --> 00:26:53.960 And it caused them sorrow over their sin. 00:26:54.180 --> 00:26:58.220 But Paul says this in another letter, 2 Corinthians chapter 7. 00:26:59.620 --> 00:27:03.380 Paul tells them about the difference between worldly and godly sorrow. 00:27:03.559 --> 00:27:06.779 2 Corinthians 7 verse 9. 00:27:07.680 --> 00:27:07.980 It says, 00:27:07.980 --> 00:27:15.120 Yet now I am happy, not because you were made sorry, but because your sorrow led you to repentance. 00:27:16.440 --> 00:27:22.079 For you became sorrowful as God intended and were not harmed in any way by us. 00:27:22.740 --> 00:27:29.380 Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret. 00:27:29.519 --> 00:27:33.440 But worldly sorrow brings death. 00:27:33.440 --> 00:27:39.240 You see how those bitter tears, even those can be sweet. 00:27:40.660 --> 00:27:43.539 Repentance actually turns back to God in relationship. 00:27:43.779 --> 00:27:52.920 Runs to find protection in Him from a premeditated or spontaneous decision to run for refuge somewhere else in that moment. 00:27:53.620 --> 00:27:55.299 Back to God and saying, 00:27:55.400 --> 00:27:59.500 I'm only safe there are tears then. 00:27:59.500 --> 00:28:04.319 The sorrow is over the emptiness of self-protection. 00:28:05.640 --> 00:28:12.259 The shame that we ever left the Father's arms looking for safety anywhere else in the first place. 00:28:12.799 --> 00:28:20.160 And the joy that our Father welcomes us back with open arms so eagerly. 00:28:21.539 --> 00:28:24.980 Have you ever wept bitterly over your sin? 00:28:24.980 --> 00:28:36.140 Have you realized that your sin has turned your back on the God who loves you and told Him that you can find life and joy and safety somewhere else? 00:28:37.440 --> 00:28:44.200 Have you ever been there in the early morning darkness like Peter, wondering if there's ever any light to come again? 00:28:44.200 --> 00:28:53.940 If you haven't, there's a good chance you haven't really met God either because that's where He is. 00:28:55.279 --> 00:28:59.279 I mean, maybe like Judas, you've been close to Him and you know a lot about Him. 00:29:00.240 --> 00:29:01.840 And you've heard lots of things. 00:29:01.839 --> 00:29:09.859 But if you've never experienced that running to yourself is completely empty, 00:29:10.500 --> 00:29:15.059 and that Jesus is the only safe refuge for sinners like you and me, 00:29:15.859 --> 00:29:20.579 then you don't really know and trust Jesus as your Savior. 00:29:21.259 --> 00:29:27.019 May it not be that any of us would leave here today just with ourselves 00:29:27.019 --> 00:29:31.599 and despairing to death over the sinfulness that we have. 00:29:31.700 --> 00:29:33.220 No, no. 00:29:34.900 --> 00:29:36.079 For none of us. 00:29:38.079 --> 00:29:41.639 But even if you're more like Peter and like me, 00:29:42.779 --> 00:29:44.200 hoping for years, 00:29:45.079 --> 00:29:47.039 pretending to be strong enough, 00:29:47.160 --> 00:29:50.779 thinking God would be found at the end of good enough, 00:29:50.779 --> 00:29:53.859 you can come to Him this morning. 00:29:55.319 --> 00:30:02.279 Come weeping bitterly over your sin that's so awful that it sent Him to the cross. 00:30:03.180 --> 00:30:05.240 And see as you're weeping, 00:30:05.379 --> 00:30:09.200 see through those tears your Savior loving you, 00:30:09.899 --> 00:30:11.240 praying for you, 00:30:11.539 --> 00:30:14.099 going to the cross for you. 00:30:16.559 --> 00:30:17.639 Listen, sinner, 00:30:19.639 --> 00:30:20.160 idolater, 00:30:20.779 --> 00:30:22.319 betrayer, 00:30:23.319 --> 00:30:23.899 denier. 00:30:25.000 --> 00:30:28.099 It is God who justifies, 00:30:28.259 --> 00:30:29.680 who brings you home. 00:30:30.420 --> 00:30:31.480 Who is to condemn? 00:30:32.359 --> 00:30:33.980 Christ Jesus died, 00:30:34.119 --> 00:30:34.899 more than that, 00:30:35.099 --> 00:30:36.200 was raised to life, 00:30:36.279 --> 00:30:37.899 and is at the right hand of God, 00:30:38.299 --> 00:30:40.379 interceding for you. 00:30:41.160 --> 00:30:42.500 You don't need anything else. 00:30:43.579 --> 00:30:45.099 He looks on you with love. 00:30:46.460 --> 00:30:48.660 He loves to forgive. 00:30:48.660 --> 00:30:51.880 He prays for your repentance 00:30:51.880 --> 00:30:54.480 and your return to Him. 00:30:54.920 --> 00:30:56.700 Won't you run to Him? 00:30:58.940 --> 00:31:00.680 See, this table is here 00:31:00.680 --> 00:31:03.220 because even as you consider that 00:31:03.220 --> 00:31:04.700 and think about what it would mean 00:31:04.700 --> 00:31:05.660 for you to run to Him, 00:31:05.920 --> 00:31:08.000 He has come running to you first. 00:31:09.160 --> 00:31:11.180 That's what this table is reminding you. 00:31:11.180 --> 00:31:14.299 Jesus sat with betrayers 00:31:14.299 --> 00:31:15.500 and deniers 00:31:15.500 --> 00:31:16.900 who would leave Him alone 00:31:16.900 --> 00:31:17.840 later that night. 00:31:19.000 --> 00:31:20.799 And He took bread and broke it 00:31:20.799 --> 00:31:21.759 and gave it to them 00:31:21.759 --> 00:31:22.180 and said, 00:31:22.500 --> 00:31:23.720 this is my body 00:31:23.720 --> 00:31:24.299 broken 00:31:24.299 --> 00:31:26.080 for 00:31:26.080 --> 00:31:26.720 you. 00:31:26.720 --> 00:31:27.360 You. 00:31:28.680 --> 00:31:29.700 Do this 00:31:29.700 --> 00:31:31.440 in remembrance of me. 00:31:31.759 --> 00:31:32.779 And then He took the cup 00:31:32.779 --> 00:31:33.160 and said, 00:31:33.660 --> 00:31:34.700 this cup is a new covenant 00:31:34.700 --> 00:31:35.940 in my blood 00:31:35.940 --> 00:31:37.420 which I'm going to pour out 00:31:37.420 --> 00:31:38.600 for the forgiveness 00:31:38.600 --> 00:31:40.120 of sins 00:31:40.120 --> 00:31:41.660 like yours and mine. 00:31:42.680 --> 00:31:43.660 Drink from it. 00:31:46.440 --> 00:31:47.779 In His behalf, 00:31:48.480 --> 00:31:50.240 I have the privilege this morning 00:31:50.240 --> 00:31:52.059 of offering you Jesus 00:31:52.059 --> 00:31:53.379 again. 00:31:54.299 --> 00:31:55.000 His body 00:31:55.000 --> 00:31:55.879 and blood 00:31:55.879 --> 00:31:58.039 given for you. 00:31:59.980 --> 00:32:01.220 No matter how often 00:32:01.220 --> 00:32:01.980 you've denied Him. 00:32:03.039 --> 00:32:04.700 No matter how your life 00:32:04.700 --> 00:32:06.339 has betrayed His goodness. 00:32:06.740 --> 00:32:08.119 No matter how heavy 00:32:08.119 --> 00:32:09.119 your heart is 00:32:09.119 --> 00:32:11.159 over your own sins. 00:32:11.619 --> 00:32:13.500 Come to Him 00:32:13.500 --> 00:32:15.319 and receive Jesus. 00:32:15.700 --> 00:32:17.940 He is running toward you. 00:32:18.399 --> 00:32:19.639 Look into His eyes 00:32:19.639 --> 00:32:21.819 and come to this table 00:32:21.819 --> 00:32:23.059 both weeping 00:32:23.059 --> 00:32:24.839 and rejoicing. 00:32:29.740 --> 00:32:31.200 For more information, 00:32:31.579 --> 00:32:32.500 visit us online 00:32:32.500 --> 00:32:33.799 at southwood.org. 00:32:33.799 --> 00:32:35.180 www.entity.tv 00:32:35.180 --> 00:32:55.039 or AmongstS