The Christ-Filled Home

[0:00] I'm talking now about the Christ-filled home and we're going to go to Colossians chapter 3 verses 18 through 21 where it reads, Wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands as it is fit in the Lord.

[0:16] Husbands love your wives and be not bitter against them. Children obey your parents in all things for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers provoke not your children to anger lest they be discouraged.

[0:32] We're going to look at some guidelines from the Bible, some building blocks if you like for a healthy family, for husbands, wives, parents.

[0:43] We know only too well that homes are under attack. A woman wanting marriage guidance said it all began when he wanted to be in the wedding photographs.

[0:53] Families are threatened. I'm sure deep down we all want to be stronger as families, to build homes where Christ is honoured. We all want to have a Christ-centred home.

[1:07] Vance Havner said, we are not at home in this world because we are made for a better one. But our home here below can be a heavenly one. There's a company in California called Rent-A-Family. The lady who started it jokes, we can do what any family does. We can come over and eat all the food, turn on all the lights, put handprints on the walls, take showers and leave towels on the floor.

[1:35] When clients are finished with Rent-A-Family, they'll have to call Rent-A-Wife. Let's look at these key building blocks now, which brings us to number one, leading.

[1:47] Leading, it says in verse 18, wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands as it is fit in the Lord. God has planned a divine order in the family that the wife submit, or in other words, be under authority.

[2:04] This is fit. It's fitting. It's proper. It's appropriate. It's the right thing. The Bible commands a virtuous woman in Proverbs 31 verse 10.

[2:14] It says,

[3:44] A Chinese proverb says to govern a small family as you would cook a small fish very gently.

[3:56] The typical modern day Western Christian has been said instead of moving their family into Sodom, like Lot did, have moved Sodom into their home in the form of television.

[4:07] It's almost impossible to rescue these people, especially their children. Another quote, marriage is an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person.

[4:19] Of course, we husbands fit the description of imperfect person. Some of us are more imperfect than others. The leadership and healthy order is an important building block of the home.

[4:34] It's been said when a woman opposes that order, she rebels against the will of God. The man is responsible to be a provider and protector. Here's another quote.

[4:45] Take time for each other. Men, come home at night. Change jobs if necessary. Psalm 104 verse 23. It says, man goeth forth unto his work and to his labor until the evening.

[4:59] God ordained for men to work during the day. Have you noticed that God turns out the lights at night? John 9 verse 4. It says, our Lord says, I must work the works of him that sent me while it is day.

[5:11] The night cometh when no man can work. Another quote, ladies, devote yourselves to your husbands, your children and your homes. When you started having children, you chose your career until they are grown.

[5:26] Stay home. Prepare the evening meal. Clean your house. Turn off the television. Go places together. Take everyone to the restaurant. Take everyone to church. That's good advice.

[5:37] Men, take the lead. Take your family to church. And women, follow the lead. The wife is called to reverence or respect her husband. It says in Ephesians 5 verse 33.

[5:49] Nevertheless, let every one of you, in particular, so love his wife even as himself. And the wife see that she reverence her husband. Reverence him, it says.

[6:00] In other words, regard him, honour him, venerate, esteem him, praise, love and admire him. The second building block is loving.

[6:12] We see that, for example, in Colossians 3 verse 19. It says, husbands, love your wives and be not bitter against them.

[6:23] It's saying husbands, it's commanding us, be loving, not bitter, harsh or dominating. Serve your wife, appreciate. Be thoughtful. Love is commitment.

[6:34] Love is commitment. This is a through thick and thin commitment. Until death do us part love. God tells husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church.

[6:46] In other words, love them to death. Husbands are to love their wives as God loves us. And how much is that? God loved us even when we were dead in sin.

[6:57] It can be hard to love a corpse. The husband is to have unconditional, sacrificial love. Here's another quote. An exhaustive study shows that no woman has ever shot her husband while he was doing the dishes.

[7:13] Husbands, let us show our love. Marriage is meant to be a sweet and sacred relationship. Marriage is for keeps. It's a covenant. God is committed to marriage.

[7:23] One plus one plus one equals one. The devil wants to drive a wedge between husband and wife. Marriage is God's idea. He created it.

[7:34] So uphold each other. Support each other. What money can't buy. A minister was speaking to the Sunday school about the things money can't buy. It can't buy laughter and it can't buy love, he told them.

[7:47] Driving his point home, he said, What would you do if I offered you $1,000 not to love your mother and father? Stunned silence ensued. Finally, a small voice queried, How much would you give me not to love my big sister?

[8:02] We're told that a husband and wife shall cleave to each other. To cling, it means to hold fast, to stick fast, to be faithful. Love is the glue.

[8:13] A super glue. It's an unbreakable bonding. And it boils down to attitude. Rather than focusing on their own rights, marriage partners must focus on their responsibilities to one another.

[8:25] What about you? Do you have a gimme-gimme attitude or do you have love like Christ has for the church? The church with all its faults and failings. Ephesians 2 verse 4 reads, But God who is rich in mercy for his great love wherewith he loved us.

[8:43] Think of that love. What great love. Abundant love. Unmerited love. Undeserved love. That's the kind of love that God calls us to. Husbands, love your wives.

[8:55] Wives, love your husbands. Titus 2 verse 4 it says, To the women that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children. It's not optional.

[9:06] It's not whether we feel like it or not. It is a command. Another building block is listening. Verse 20 it says, Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.

[9:22] Obey. It means listen attentively. Hearken in everything. Listening means keeping your mouth closed. Show them respect and honor them. This pleases the Lord. Obedience means respect for authority.

[9:35] Some families don't give time to listening. There's barriers. There's walls. Someone said, I put a mirror on my TV set. I wanted to see what my family looked like.

[9:45] It's good to spend time to listen. Obeying means really listening and bearing with each other, hearing each other. Ephesians 6.23 it says, Honor thy father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise, that it may be well with thee, and that thou mayest live long on the earth.

[10:04] If we want to live long and prosper, let us honor our parents. Respect is a feeling. Honor is an act. It could mean for children, schoolwork, help with the dishes, making your bed, cutting the grass, reading some good books, being polite and courteous and kind, keeping your temper and your tongue under control.

[10:27] Disobeying or dishonoring parents is something very serious. And if we do the right thing, there's great reward. Another building block is learning. It says in verse 21, Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

[10:43] And similarly it says in Ephesians 6 verse 4, And ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. So parents, build up and encourage your children.

[10:56] There's learning and training here in the home. A Christ-filled home is one where we can be encouraged and supported and built up. Not a home where children are disheartened and pulled down, picked on.

[11:08] Fathers were instructed, don't vex them, harass them, irritate them, don't be hard on them. You may not be a perfect parent, but you can be a positive example. Be a supporter, an encourager, a coach, a guide.

[11:22] The evangelist Gypsy Smith used to say that there are five gospels, Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, and you. You may be the only gospel some people read. You are to be an example, especially to your family.

[11:35] Parents to children, children to parents. So parents, let's exercise wise and loving authority. You are training your children, whether you realize it or not. And they're learning.

[11:46] They're learning your bad habits, your bad attitudes sometimes. Proverbs 22, verse 6, it says, train up a child in the way he should go. And when he is old, he will not depart from it.

[11:58] Another quote here, it's commonplace how easily a child of three or four picks up a foreign language, if exposed to it, without any formal teaching. Yet we are unwilling to admit that a child of the same age picks up our unconscious attitudes and prejudices without being taught, and often retains these longer than any of his formal education.

[12:21] Training means discipline and also encouragement. Parents are to model the Christian life before their children. We know that from scripture that marriage is a lifelong commitment.

[12:32] Homes are meant to be built to last. Families are meant to have these strong building blocks. A Christ-filled home is one that is encouraging, peaceful. It has leading, loving, listening, and learning.

[12:47] Family. Thank you.