God is the maker and designer of healthy marriage relationships and family living. The Biblical model shows us how we can find the fitting roles and relationships that honour Him.
[0:00] The Bible gives us a blueprint for the home. A blueprint for the Christian home. The maker of the family has a plan for us of how the family can work best.
[0:13] ! The framework of a Christian home.
[0:32] Some important guidelines for a healthy marriage, relationship and family living. God has the perfect plan. God has designed the family. God cares about families.
[0:43] Let's learn about how the family can operate in a Biblical way. How can I become a better spouse? What does God expect of me in my marriage, in my family? Am I going God's way?
[0:54] Let's see how has God designed the family to operate. Colossians 3, verse 18-21 it says, Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands as it is fit in the Lord.
[1:11] Husbands, love your wives and be not bitter against them. Children, obey your parents in all things for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.
[1:24] Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. First he addresses the husbands and wives. Marriage is a lifelong commitment, a covenant.
[1:36] Family is important. And yet, do we really show it? How is your family? Someone said, I put a mirror on my TV set. I wanted to see what my family looked like.
[1:49] Now there's a sense where there's a lot of lack in the home in terms of that relationship building. Someone has said, don't brag about your ancestors. Give your descendants something to brag about.
[2:02] Now let's look at ourselves. Let's look at some principles of how a family will best work according to its designers. Verse 18 says, Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands as it is fit in the Lord.
[2:19] This doesn't mean women have a lower status or men are to be dictators or men should always get their own way. It means voluntary submission. A willing, joyful submission to the leadership of their husband.
[2:33] A recognition of authority. It involves a commitment, a concern, a learning from him, helping him, working with him, a reverence of him. It's a military term.
[2:44] It's phrased as a command. It's described as a lining up of soldiers under the commanding officer. There are different ranks and the home is meant to have an order and a harmony to it.
[2:56] The wife has a responsibility to follow the lead of the husband. The wife is not to be selfish but to take her place as a support and a help meet for her husband.
[3:08] It says it is fitting in the Lord. It's the right and proper thing. Verse 19, husbands. Husbands are spoken to here. Husbands, love your wives and be not bitter against them.
[3:21] The love spoken of here is love that is selfless. Serving, giving, love, love without thought of return. It could be put keep on continuously, supernaturally, sacrificially loving.
[3:37] Someone has put this together. Tell her so. Tell her so. Amid the cares of married life, in spite of toil and business strife, If you value your sweet wife.
[3:49] Tell her so. There was a time you thought it bliss, To get the favour of a kiss. A dozen now won't come amiss. Tell her so. Do not act as if she has passed her prime, As though to please her was a crime.
[4:06] If e'er you loved her now is the time. Tell her so. Never let her heart grow cold. Richer beauties will unfold. She is worth her weight in gold.
[4:18] Tell her so. Although the husband is the head, He should not tread underfoot his wife. Eve was taken from Adam's side to symbolise her place by his side.
[4:30] Eve was not to rule, but to be a helper and companion. Husbands must love their wives. Each is to compliment the other. Also, husbands are not to be harsh or selfish.
[4:43] Paul says, be not bitter against them. Instead of being bitter, be forgiving. In verse 20 it addresses the children now. Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.
[4:56] It says, children are to obey. There is a higher authority that we are to respect. Children listen to your parents. It's been said, parents are not always right, but they are always your parents.
[5:11] Here's an amusing quote here from Edward VIII. He said this, the thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children.
[5:22] You know, it's the wrong way around, isn't it? What's happening these days? But children are to honour their parents, to accept their instruction. In Ephesians 6 verses 2 to 3 it says, Honour thy father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise, that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
[5:41] To honour means to show respect, to regard them highly. In Ephesians 6 verse 1 it says, obey them. It is right. It is the right thing to do. Verse 21 says, fathers, provoke not to be the right thing.
[5:54] Provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. You know, parents, especially fathers, we have a responsibility for encouragement, for sensible discipline, and how we can act in a way that will be fair for our children and consistent.
[6:10] It's been said, don't make unreasonable demands that make no allowance for the inexperience and immaturity of the child. Don't humiliate. Discipline should not be arbitrary or unkind.
[6:23] That will not build up the child. It will lead to discouragement and frustration. And the quote goes on, do not abdicate responsibility either.
[6:34] We are to give our children a Christ-centred training for life. Here's another quote. There are little eyes upon you, and they're watching night and day.
[6:45] There are little ears that quickly take in every word you say. You're the little fellow's idol. You're the wisest of the wise. In his little mind about you, no suspicions ever rise.
[6:56] You are setting an example every day in all that you do to the little boy who is waiting to grow up and become like you. In Ephesians 6 verse 4 it says, And ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
[7:14] It says, don't provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the Lord. With that right discipline. It's talking about instruction and training. Let's grow to be such a family that follows God's blueprint.
[7:30] Let's grow to a group of brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and brothers and