[0:00] take your Bibles and open them with me if you would to 1 Samuel. I know we're supposed to be in Isaiah, but while I was in Peru, I worked on a whole bunch of new stuff. And so I am going to preach a series of messages on Thursday nights for a while on child rearing from the Bible.
[0:19] And so I want to take you back through the story that you have heard if you come on Sunday mornings, but these missionaries haven't heard. And we're going to talk about honoring God above your children. Before we get into that, I'd just like to say we are blessed beyond what we could possibly imagine. I don't know if you have any idea, but 36 families out of our church are now missionaries.
[0:40] 36 families have surrendered. We have godly parents in our church that have given their children. We have godly deacons tonight. We have John and Sandy who have raised up a missionary wife, Catherine Rostelli. We have Chuck and Lisa who have raised up a missionary wife, and Hannah Shreve.
[1:06] And then we have Jeff and Deanna Mize who have raised up a son, Justice Mize. And that's just an unheard of thing in a church. And 36 missionary families, an unheard of thing. And I'm just so proud of you and blessed that I get to serve with you. We have a lot to do to reach our own area, and we have a I'm very glad that God has worked to bring the Canavans along and for them to go start a church.
[1:33] We need to pray for others that would do the same. I get calls all the time. I got a call this week about it, but most people aren't ready maybe to pay the price that has to be paid. But anyway, praise the Lord for what he's doing. Go with me, if you would, to 1 Samuel 2 and verse 12. 1 Samuel 2 and verse 12. I want to talk to you tonight about honoring God above your children. I think it is an exciting thing when you read the Bible and you see the stories that are told of God and how children are raised. And everybody in this room, I'm sure by now, knows very well that Eli was the man of God before Samuel. And Samuel will be a little boy when he goes to live with Eli. And Eli did a lousy job raising his children. And the Bible makes that clear. There's some very harsh and ugly statements that are actually made about Eli right in the scriptures about how he didn't raise his children and the things that went bad. The sad thing is that Samuel learned from Eli and did much the same thing wrong with his own children and he lost his own children. The story is in the book of, in the story of 1 Samuel chapter 2, you have the story of a man raising his children and them not doing right. Look at verse 12. The sons of Eli were sons of Balao. That's like saying sons of the devil.
[2:53] They knew not the Lord. They knew not the Lord. Skip down to verse 17. If you would, the Bible says, the sin of the young men, that's the sons of Eli, was very great before the Lord. For men abhorred, his sons hated the offering of the Lord. So what happened was they've been raised in the house of the man of God and they got to eat the offerings that were brought in and the sacrifices. That's where they get their food supply. But they said, I want my meat cooked the way I want it cooked. I want my things done the way I want them done. I don't want to wait on the way God had it planned. And so they didn't like it. They didn't like the way the offerings were being given to them. Verse 22, look at your Bible. And Eli was very old and he heard all that his sons did unto all Israel, how they lay with the women that assembled at the door of the tabernacle. So Eli's an old man. His boys are messing up. They are not happy with the offering, not enjoying the offering that God gave them.
[3:54] They are having sexual relations with women at the very house of God. Eli's heart's broken. And in verse 23, he goes to them and says, guys, I hear of your evil dealings. Everybody's talking about the junk you guys are doing. Verse 24. Now, boys, no, my sons, it's not good what I'm hearing.
[4:16] You're even causing God's people to do wrong, to transgress. I mean, guys, if you sin against a man, that's one thing. But when you sin against God, there's nobody we can even ask to help you.
[4:28] And yet they wouldn't listen to their dad. Verse 29. God says, why do you kick at my sacrifice? Why do you not like what I set up for you? Why are you not satisfied with the way I want to take care of you?
[4:41] I've commanded and I wish I've commanded in my habitation, my house, my ministry, my offerings, your mind. You ought to be happy with the way I want to do it, but you're not happy. And then he says, Eli and Eli, buddy, you honor your sons above me. Eli, you honor your sons above me. You make yourselves fat with the cheapest of the offerings. You honor your sons above me. Verse 30. And the Lord God of Israel said, I said, indeed, that thy house and house of thy father should walk before me forever. But now the Lord says, be it far from me. For them that honor me, I will honor. And they that despise me will be lightly esteemed.
[5:25] You don't love me, buddy. You don't honor me. You don't put me first. Well, I'm not going to do things for you either. You don't want to put God first. And so God is very angry. And in verse 35, he lets Eli know that he is fully going to raise up somebody to take his place and to become the man. This should have been the first book of Eli and the second book of Eli, but Eli honored his children above his God.
[5:53] When you're raising kids, before you have kids, it's like, I love God. And when you don't have children, it's pretty easy. When you don't have children, it's pretty easy to know all about child rearing. I mean, when you're not married, you know all about marriage. Amen. You could even write an advice column about it. Never been married. You can hold marriage seminars. You'd have the best marriage example anybody could ever have because if you've never been married, you could really tell some good stories and nobody know the difference. If you had never had children, you could say that.
[6:25] But, but when, when you get married and God gives you a child, something happens in your heart, you fall so in love with your kid. And it is very easy to love your child so much that you will not honor God. It is very easy to, to love your child so much that you won't honor God. It's very easy to say, man, I just love my kid. And I'm just going to say a few things. I'm just going to go ahead and make you a little bit mad. That's why you just let them lay out a church. You wouldn't let them lay out a football game or the, or the, or, or, or the, or, or, or the school sort of thing. But God, you can slack up on that because you honor your kid. You'd make sure your kid got their shots and you make sure your kid got their education, but might not worry too much about the things that God, something might be a little wrong when that goes on in our lives. I would like to give you some things that I think I can see that would have made this story differently. Number one, you need to lead your children to Christ. Look, if you would, at chapter two and verse 12, you need to lead your children to Christ. The Bible says in chapter two and verse 12, now the sons of Eli were sons of Belial.
[7:30] They're not saved. They were raised in the home of a man of God. They were around the offerings all the time. They were, they, they saw all the things of God. They would have been as familiar with it.
[7:45] They could have explained every bit of it to you, but they didn't know God. And what goes on? People all over America are losing their kids. Preachers lose their kids. The majority of preacher kids don't turn out to serve God. The majority of deacon's kids don't turn out to serve God.
[8:01] And so something's wrong in there. My first responsibility as a dad ought to be, I want my kids to know Jesus as their personal savior. Can I get an amen right there? You know one of the blessings of being in the little meeting we were just in, as we talked to these new missionaries coming with us and is to have, have one of the young men look across and say, you know, my dad, he led me to Christ. You know, my dad, he led me to Christ. I was like, Lord of God, you can't get it any better than that. That's what old Eli should have done. Sometimes you can be so interested in the ministry that you don't take time to even talk to your own kids. You got to make sure that you just don't take the gospel in church for granted. I don't know if this is, you know, this is, I think, one of our problems. When you're overseas and, and, and, and you're in a certain areas of the world where there is no Christianity, where being a Christian gets you in trouble, where people don't like you because you like Jesus, where people mock you when you go to church, it makes church more precious. People used to literally walk down the road on the way to the Hunter church back in the day, and they hid their Bibles in their, in a, in a briefcase or wrapped it in a newspaper or stuck it in their pants. And they'd walk down the road because they didn't want people to know they're going to church. Cause when they went to church, everybody's sat on the side of the road, all the drunks would be sitting there and they'd go, Hey brother, Hey brother, you're going down to church, brother. And they mocked them for that. I think today that's probably not happening like it used to, but I bet it's still happening to some. And so it's kind of hard though. And with us,
[9:31] Hey, church is just where we live church. And we're here all the time. We've heard the gospel preached. We've, we've, uh, we've, uh, we've read the Bible. We've learned the songs. We know all the stuff and we get to taking it for granted. You need to teach your kids to listen in church.
[9:47] You need to let them see how much you love Jesus. You know what the greatest influence you're going to have on your kids and getting them to Jesus is that it's not a job. It's not a responsibility.
[9:58] It's not what you're supposed to do. You really do love Jesus. And when it comes time to go to church, it's not, Hey, we got to go to church. It's, Hey, let's get to church, man. Can't wait to see God's people. Can't wait to sing songs to God. Can't wait to preach the Bible together. I can't wait to get to church. It's so sad to see the children of the men of God, not saved and not knowing God. Look at verse 12. The sons of Eli were sons of Belial. They knew not the Lord. Second thing I want you to guide them to the, to the Lord. By the way, our daughter, Joy, at the age of four, Betty called me. I was at the church. There weren't cell phones back then. You had phones that had, there was these little boxes and they sat on tables and they were hooked with these wires and you had to push, you had to dial this button. It would, you don't know anything about that.
[10:46] You couldn't say, Hey Siri, call my wife. It wasn't that work back then. Uh, I, I never, I, I, my dream for so many years was to have a church big enough. I have one in phones where I could push a button and say, call him. Now you don't need that. So I just say, Hey Siri, just call Betty for me. How about that? Betty calls me on the telephone and she's crying and she's all broken hearted. And I said, good night, honey. What's wrong? She said, I'm scared about our daughter, Joy. And I said, what in the world? She said, Joy wants to go to hell. She said, I was talking to Joy and Joy. She said, I want to go to hell. I love the devil. I don't want to go to heaven.
[11:22] And Betty was all torn up. Thank God she got over that one. Amen. She's a pastor's wife today, but thank God. Guide your children to Christ. Number two, instruct your children in the things of God.
[11:36] They knew not the Lord. Verse 12. They knew not the Lord. They do not the Lord. Here they are, children of blot and they don't know God. Now, how do you live in God's house, eat God's food, set at God's table, watch your daddy do the things of God all day long, all day long. And you don't know God. And the reason I think is because we're not doing what the Bible said. Proverbs chapter 22, verse six, train up a child. Amazingly, you can't get your child to sit still for a church service.
[12:08] So I have to go to the bathroom, but you can, your dog and your cat. Some of you, if you take lessons on how you train your dog, you can probably get your kids sit still. You might have to carry some treats in your pocket and say, take it out of the recording.
[12:29] Number two, use every available opportunity when you instruct them. Did you know that you have a built-in audience? It's like when you preach in jail. If you ever been, if you ever preached in jail, they can't leave. I mean, where are they going to go? They're like, you say, I'm glad y'all are here tonight. They're like, we're not that glad. When you're a dad, you got all the kids in the room.
[12:50] They don't have a choice. You get to teach them. And Deuteronomy chapter six and verses six through nine. And I'll have time to go through those, but you know what it said? It said, when you get up in the morning, y'all be talking about Jesus. When you sit down and eat a meal, y'all be talking about Jesus.
[13:03] When you're walking down the road, y'all be talking about Jesus. When you're laying down at night, y'all be talking about Jesus. You ought to make sure you're talking about Jesus. You say, well, I talk about Jesus all the time. I'm really tired about talking about Jesus. I get home.
[13:15] Most important people in the world for you are your kids. You know why you'd honor your kids above God? Because every parent understands this because you love your kids too much. I've gotten myself in trouble. I've defended my kids when I probably shouldn't have defended them, but they're my kids. I mean, what are you going to do? They're yours. Don't honor your kids above God.
[13:41] You got to give them an example with your life. I'm going to preach all these verses again to you, but in Genesis chapter 18 and verse 19, which happens to be one of my very favorite things about instructing your children. God says this about Abraham. He said, I know him and I know he will command his children and his household after him. You never tell your kids to do what you don't do.
[14:05] You never tell your kids to read the Bible because unless you read the Bible, you never tell your kids to be happy at church, to pay attention in church and pray and read the Bible and trust Jesus. You never do that unless that's your example. They're going to do what you do a whole lot more than what you tell them to do. I'm a pastor and I lead and I train to work with a lot of people. And one of my favorite sayings is just do what you're going to do because I know you're going to do it anyway.
[14:30] But you know what? They'll imitate you a whole lot quicker than they'll obey you. And he said, I know him and he'll lead them and he'll teach them to keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment. You're to use the word of God. In 2 Timothy 3, 15, Lois and Eunice had talked to Timothy and Paul writes to Timothy and said, Tim, buddy, you know that from a child, you have known the Holy Scriptures. Isn't that amazing? From a child, he didn't even have a daddy in his life to tell him about Jesus as far as we know about the Bible. But since he was a little bitty kid, mama and grandmama sat him down and said, let us teach you. And Paul says, I know you, Timmy, you've known it since you was a little kid. This story is a tragedy. They were so close to the things of God, but they never believed. They saw the fire take the offering. They saw the people make the offering. They heard the great choirs singing. They saw all the blood being shed. They heard all the sermons being preached.
[15:31] That's our story if we're not careful. The third thing, and the most important thing in this message is you must restrain your children. This is the real reason I preach this message. I've preached it dozens of times over the years. 1 Samuel 3, verse 13, I have told him that I will judge his house forever for the iniquity which he knows because his sons made themselves vile, filthy, wicked, dirty.
[16:00] And look at this. And he restrained them not. You underline that. He restrained them not. Now, I read the story and I'm like, wait a minute. Now, that's not quite true. Don't you remember when he was old? When he was old, he said, hey, come here, boys. I hear all this stuff going on. I want to talk to you. What you're doing is not right. You shouldn't be doing that. But he didn't restrain them according to the scripture. Look if you would at verse 22. Now, Eli was very old. Chapter 2, verse 22. And he heard all that his sons did unto all Israel. They lay with the women. Verse 23, he said unto them, why are y'all doing that? Verse 24, nay, my sons, don't do this. He told them no.
[16:45] He told them what they were doing wasn't good. He even gave them a godly warning, but it was too late. And sometimes it's past talking time.
[16:58] I've had problems raising my own kids. I have dealt with a lot of junk raising my kids. And so I'm not saying we aren't going to have problems. But you know, you can't sit down and have a discussion and reason with a small child. And if you, you know, what's really the problem? You know, what's really the problem with Eli's kids? They're grownups. They weren't taught while they were young.
[17:29] There's still a time when they're moldable. Some of you are saying, well, I'm going to spank my kid when he gets to be six or eight or 10. I think I'll start spanking him by then. It's way too late. He didn't restrain them. I know he said no, but God said, you might've said no, but you didn't stop them. Facts are he should have had church discipline on his own kids. The facts are he should have embarrassed his family and gotten his kids out of the ministry. The facts are he should have taken hard stands, but he didn't. Here's what we know. Discipline works with those that understand.
[18:06] Listen to Proverbs chapter 19 and verse 25. Proverbs chapter 19 and verse 25. Smite a scorner and the simple will beware. Reprove one that has understanding and he will understand knowledge. Just to be honest, we are raising a nation, a generation of brats.
[18:25] And the Spanish word for brats, which means poorly raised. I think it's a much better way to describe or bad raising. It's a much better way to describe a brat. In Spanish, it's a much better word than it is in English. In English, we say the kids are brats. In Spanish, it says the parents are brats.
[18:44] You got brats for kids. Look in a mirror. It's your fault. You didn't discipline them. We better teach them while they're young and can learn. There will come a time when only those that understand can be reproved. We've got to discipline them. The Bible says in Proverbs chapter 20 and verse 30, don't read the verse. Don't read it. Because it says the blueness of the wound cleanses away evil. I am not advocating you leaving blue wounds. But you know what? You won't even use any discipline. And maybe you're like, whoa, I can't believe God said it. I didn't say it. That's what it says here. But it's pretty, pretty, pretty obvious in the Bible that God was like, they need a good busting every now and then. Thank you for the one amen-er.
[19:41] I know you love your kid too much to spank them. But you're going to wish you had when God says to you, I was going to let you and your family always be in charge of the ministry here, but now you're out. And it won't be but just a few days after what he says right here, when Eli was a man after my own heart, he was a big fat man. Our newest student today said he didn't know whose class he was in.
[20:02] They said, who was teaching that class? Yeah, a big fat guy. I love a skinny little kid. I'm going to call him skinny the rest of the time he's here at our church. So he's a big fat guy and his two boys died. The ark is lost and he falls off a stool and breaks his neck because he was heavy. But the Bible says, you don't want to wait for that. If you don't discipline your kids, the teachers will have to.
[20:25] And if the teachers can't handle a discipline, your kids, the police will have to. In Proverbs chapter 22 and verse 15, the Bible says, foolishness is bound in the heart of a child, but a good spanking will drive it far from them.
[20:45] I know we don't like that, but it is still in the book. Remember, this isn't about living a good life, but it's about eternity. You got to spank them. You got to deal with them. You want, they need to know they failed. And this thing of you always acting like they're great and everything is good is probably the worst thing you could do. They need to know you've done wrong. There comes a day when you can't do anything about your kids. Eli, why didn't you restrain your kids? I don't know. Were they running like wild? Can't say any words anymore. Were they running like crazy people? That's probably wrong to say that too. They ran around. Offerings are going on. Nobody's supposed to go in that room. That's the room where only the man of God goes. And maybe their kids come busting through the room and daddy should have snapped them up by the nap of the neck, give them a good swat and said, you know, you're not supposed to be in here. Or did he say, just don't tell nobody. What'd he do? You know what'll bring God's discipline. You know, God disciplines people. So let's, let's discipline them. So they don't have to be disciplined by God.
[21:54] I want me to verse 17, if you would teach your children to respect the house of God and the things of God. This is a horrible verse in my opinion. Although I can say to you that there have been plenty of times and I've been guilty of it. Wherefore the sin of the young men was very great before the Lord.
[22:13] For men hated, abhorred the offering of the Lord. See, they got used to the things of God. I had a problem in Peru, you know, preachers lived in church buildings. So, I mean, honestly, we didn't have, I didn't have enough money to be buying a church building and getting a place where the preacher lived. So we'd get this building and it wouldn't be, the whole building wouldn't be as big as this auditorium. And we built him an auditorium and we built him a bedroom, maybe two bedrooms. And we'd get him a bathroom and a little kitchen and he would live in the church.
[22:45] And that's the way it is all, almost everywhere you go around the world, you're going to find a little preacher living right there in the church. And you know, what happened was the kid got so used to it. He is, his playing place was up here where the preaching took place. You know, he just runs up here, runs his little cars around. And so sometimes he just, this is there. There's nothing special about the mic. Nothing special about that piano. Nothing special about that pulpit. Nothing special about any of this. He's just having fun in his living room. I've been known to be preaching and a preacher's kid just take a turn right around behind me. I stepped on one one time and that is not a good deal. I mean, I was preaching and, and I stepped back like that. And when I did, I stomped his little foot. He started screaming and, and ran to the back. I told him, I said, we better get a nursery if y'all want me to kill one of you kids. They got used to it and they weren't satisfied with the things that God had provided. See, their problem was they didn't like what God provided. When you get used to the, the offerings, when you get used to it, our kids need to see that we still hold an all for God.
[23:49] A guy came to me in Peru, uh, in the last year or two, so it'd be 13 or 14 years ago. He came to me while I was at Faith Baptist Church and pastoring there and he came to me and he said, we, he said, I need to talk to you. He said, my, my nephew is getting real interested in your church and religion junk. And he said, now you're an educated man, aren't you? I said, well, I went to college.
[24:09] And he said, now you and me both know that when you're a kid, you can believe his foolishness, but you've lived long enough. No, there's not a God. I'm a university professor. You're a smarter man. No, there's not a God. And I want you to tell that kid that you're just standing up or running your mouth because you get paid for it. It ain't really real. And I said, well, here's the problem.
[24:29] He said, what? I said, I think it's real. But let me tell you what I know about preachers. I know it ain't real. So lots of them. I tell you something I know about deacons.
[24:40] It doesn't take long to where we're no longer coming into this room saying, I need God to speak. I need God to work. We lost the all. We've lost the thing of, Oh God, will you work? And our kids know, we are no longer humbled before a mighty God. Our kids know we're doing a routine. Our kids know we're living a ritual. Our kids know daddy leads the songs and the daddy preaches and daddy runs the sound system and daddy counts the money and daddy does all that, but it's just what we do. And it ain't that real to him. Somehow that happens. And these guys are like, I don't like the offering.
[25:15] I don't like the food. I'm tired of the way God does stuff. We need to help our kids see the all. We need to still have the all. We need to help them see God working in our lives.
[25:27] Our kids need to be able to say, man, I know one thing. My daddy loves God. God hears his prayers. God answers him. He's in love with God. It's real for him. Don't get used to the things of God. So they become commonplace. Serving God is no joke. It's not what we do. It's what's right.
[25:46] And it has consequences. Let me finish with verse 29. Honor God more than you do your children. Verse 29. Why? Wherefore, kick you at my sacrifice and my offering, which I commanded in my habitation. And you honor your sons above me.
[26:07] I think Eli gave his kids what they wanted instead of teaching them what God wanted. You know, it doesn't take a kid long to know how to throw a fit and squall and cry and kick and faint and turn red to get what they want. And parents are all panicking. One of my favorite TV shows of all time is Andy Mayberry. And little Opie in the show has been running around with a new kid that moved to town. And a new kid said, you can get your daddy to do anything. Let me teach you how to do it.
[26:43] And so the kid goes to throw in a fit and laying on the floor and doing all that junk. And he said, if you do that, your daddy will give in. So Opie walks into the sheriff's office, into the jail. And he said, dad, I need you to do this. And his dad said, no. And Opie just threw himself in the floor and went to kicking and screaming and turning red. He wouldn't breathe. And so Andy just walked over on the table and sat there. And finally, Opie opens his eyes. He goes, what are you going to do?
[27:07] He said, I'm just waiting for you to get through. Then we'll talk this over. He wasn't going to jump up, but you know, you can make fun of that. But I watch it sometimes, don't we? I want this. I want that. When I allow my children to do what they want instead of teaching them what God wants, then I'm honoring my children more than I'm honoring my God.
[27:30] When I allow my children to do what they want instead of teaching them what God wants, I'm honoring my children above the Lord. Real worship is obeying more than it is going through motions. In 1 Samuel chapter 15 and verse 22, it says to obey is better than sacrifice. Coming here to church isn't what we're looking for. We're looking for falling in love with Jesus, giving an offering is not what we're looking for. Singing the songs and mumbling through the mumbo jumble is not what we're looking for. We're looking for honoring God. The best example I can give you is when I do what God wants more than what I want. That's honoring God. The hardest thing you tell your children is no. I think it's probably the most important word they ought to learn in their entire life. No. You can throw a fit, but you are not getting what you want. You happen to live in a day and time, and I know there are kids with real physical, emotional, psychological problems. I know that. But most problems could probably be solved with Proverbs. The hardest thing is telling your children no. You are to please God more than you are to please your children. In verse 30, wherefore the Lord God of Israel said, I said indeed that thy house and the house of thy father would walk before me forever. But now the Lord said, be it far from me. For them that honor me will I honor.
[28:55] And they that despise me shall be lightly esteemed. You got to please God. If in the long run you put God first and you do what he wants, that'll be best for your children. That'll be best for your future.
[29:09] It's a horrible story. It's a horrible story. Eli, a great man of God. Eli, Eli who was raised up Samuel.
[29:20] Eli, what a man of God. He had a great future. And the only real thing I know that he did wrong was he didn't raise his kids right. I'm not trying to judge us. I've had more mess ups with kids than everybody in this room has. I'm not trying to judge you at all. I'm not trying to make you feel bad at all. But if you're young, you got young enough kids, you need to take it. You guys got these kids in diapers. You need to get on the stick, buddy. You need to figure out now it's time to raise my kid right. For me, it's a little too late. They're grown. And for a lot of us in this room, we, if we could go back and redo it, we do differently than we did before. There are a lot of things we change, but you can change them now. Get in the book of Proverbs. Don't listen to TV shows that teach you don't. It'll just make him violent. It'll just make him violent. You ever, you ever spank him, make him violent. I wouldn't listen to that. I'd listen to God. I really wouldn't listen. I'd listen to God. Hey, if you take things away from him, you'll make him a thief when he grows up because you have to learn to steal. No, come on.
[30:24] Honor God above your children. Get along with God and let him tell you how to raise kids.
[30:36] By the way, he will not speak to you audibly. He will speak to you through the book. If you read it, he'll help you. What a sad story. Eli, I had big plans for you. I had big plans for your sons.
[30:49] I was going to let you write first Eli and second Eli. You'd have been one of the most famous men in the Bible, but instead it's going to be Samuel. What'd you do wrong? Well, you did a real good job being a preacher. You did a real good job leading the worship, but you did a lousy job at home.
[31:07] And let me tell you why I'm canning you today. I'm canning you because you weren't a good parent, because you honored your children above me.
[31:22] You got to take something away from your kid. Don't take a youth event away from your kid. You got to take something away from your kid. Take away something where they're not going to hear about God. Tonight, you guys ought to, every parent in this room ought to say, I'm going to make sure I'm talking about Jesus. I'd rather my kid hate me because he heard too much about Jesus than my kid one day be a son of Belal who knew nothing about God.